The Unspoken Rules of Society

you wake up in the morning head outside and you say good morning to your next-door neighbor you walk down the street and you see a familiar face so you nodded them to let them know that you acknowledge them you get into a bus and an old lady walks in behind you so you stand up and let her take your seat you're not compelled to do any of these things there are no moral handbooks or guides that give us a checklist of the world's do's and don'ts it's not in any constitution or any written rule but somehow we all know these rules we strictly abide by them we don't tell each other what they are but we all know when someone breaks them these are the unspoken rules of society aristotle once said man is by nature a social animal an individual who is unsocial naturally and not accidentally is either beneath our notice or more than human because we're such social animals we depend on one another for everything including sometimes determining what is right and what's wrong we come together to make seats of government appoint leaders to keep things in check and we write ourselves a constitution but that's for the big stuff for the little things that we are more likely to face every day there are no rules or constitutional demands just a common understanding among all of us on what is right and what is wrong but we don't always get it right as a society we love to look at pictures it reminds us of a time that once was it makes us feel nostalgic and when we share these pictures with people it gives them a sneak peek into our lives where we were how far we've come and all the things we've been through along the way before smartphones we'd all keep large family photo albums in our house for when a guest comes over and occasionally as they sat we'd hand it over to them and bond over the memories of the past now we still do that today just in a different way we often send pictures to one another from our smartphones post throwback photos on social media and simply just hand our phones to people to see a certain picture but then they start swiping left or right to see more pictures so we get angry but why because they've just broken an unspoken rule don't swipe left or right if someone shows you a photo on their phone unless they tell you it's okay to do so because unlike our family photo albums that are carefully curated to show the pictures we're comfortable with others seeing our phones have everything from funny memes we want to share to private photos that should never be seen by anyone else this is why it's important to restrict yourself to as much information as the other person is willing to share it's amazing when you think about it but smartphones are a very recent invention the very first commercial smartphone was released around 30 years ago but it wasn't until 2007 with the release of the iphone that phones truly became smart by modern standards and in such a short period of time as a society we've been able to create unspoken rules around using the smartphone that somehow we all just seem to follow before phones were invented we always had to visit each other unannounced but since phones came around and texting became a thing we created a new unspoken rule you don't normally go to people's houses without texting or calling them to let them know of course this often exempts family members and very close friends but if you just want to stop by the house of your co-worker or someone you're not really close to you should probably send them a text first or you won't be greeted by a smiling face when you ring the doorbell as humans we communicate not with just our words but also with our actions in fact as the saying goes actions speak louder than words when we speak to each other we're watching for hand gestures hand movements proximity we're watching for body language oftentimes this helps us know exactly how we're doing in a conversation does the person seem interested do they look confused all of that this is why it's considered rude to look down at your phone screen when someone's talking to you even if you're listening to them without most concentration people want to be able to look you in the eyes when they're talking to you in the same vein it's also considered rude to leave your earbuds in your ear while you're talking to people this has become even more important since wireless earbuds became a thing because they're so tiny and comfortable it's easy to leave them in your ears even when you're talking to people but as a society we've come together to say that it's much more respectful to take the earbuds out so people don't think they have to shout at you to hear them people on public transport often have no respect for personal space and honestly most times it's not really their fault there's just very little room for everyone to share we've learned to understand these things but still there are boundaries you must not cross no matter how close you have to be to someone else just don't look at their phone like i already alluded to earlier phones usually contain really private and sensitive information some of which you really might not want to see and peeping into someone else's phone is a sure way to witness the unforgettable speaking of smartphones and public transportation there is one unspoken rule i wish more people would follow don't play music out of your speakers in a small public place like in a waiting room or on a bus no matter how amazing you think that song is not everyone's gonna like it and even if everyone does some people might have just had a rough day and just want to sit in silence to take a break and recollect their thoughts we should give them the opportunity to do this if you want to listen to music on your commute get a pair of wireless earbuds they're pretty cheap similarly don't take personal calls in public is another really popular unspoken rule unless it's an emergency no one really wants to hear the conversation you're having with your long-lost second cousin or all the office gossip your co-worker is giving you and if you must take the call it's best you find somewhere even moderately private or reduce your voice to the bare minimum to avoid getting dirty looks from the people around you when someone whispers something to you it's an unspoken rule to whisper or reply back to them because more often than not they're whispering because they don't want anyone else hearing it on your conversation as humans we tell a lot of lies sometimes we lie to make ourselves feel better sometimes we lie to protect other people's feelings sometimes we lie to impress people sometimes to fit better in certain social spaces and sometimes we just want to get some time off work whatever the reason might be for you the truth is we lie a lot and for the most part we've accepted this as a society however as a rule there are two people you never lie to your doctor and your lawyer thankfully these two people are also required by law to take your truths to the grave so you don't have to worry about your secrets getting exposed to prevent people from lying unnecessarily just to save face there are also some questions we just don't ask you normally never ask how much they earn how much they weigh and you never ask a woman her age why that is i'm still not so sure if you're close enough to people you'll most likely know all of these details without asking and if you're not close enough to them to know then you're not close enough to be asking either it's important to say it again that humans are very social animals this means that we thrive in groups as a result we've learned to be kind to one another it creates a sense of camaraderie and helps us build and strengthen our communities so to make it easier for everyone we created unspoken rules to help us determine what is kind what is nice and what is not if you had an arrangement to meet up with someone and for some reason you had to cancel it's your job to reschedule when you do this you let the person know that you value their time and you're willing to make things right for not fulfilling your end of the bargain previously if someone offers to share food with you they get to have the first and the last pieces and if they have just one piece left it's only courteous that you don't ask them for that thing at all being kind doesn't always mean cheering people on sometimes it's pointing out flaws and helping to fix them whenever we can however as an unspoken rule you should only point out flaws that can be fixed in 30 seconds or less you're having lunch with your friend and there's something on his teeth tell him your girlfriend's shirt got untucked in the back let her know but things like her makeup or his poor combination of clothes there's no need to point it out if they can't immediately do anything about it you'll only make them insecure and self-conscious there are two places you should never make fuss or start drama a wedding end at a funeral weddings are really special and sacred to most people and in most cultures around the world so ruining one is heavily frowned upon in our society don't try to propose at someone else's wedding please unless they offer do not ask them because then you put them in a weird position where it's difficult for them to say no especially if you're close friends don't make their lives harder than they need to be at funerals you should have respect for the dead let people pay their final respects to their deceased loved ones you can meet the living relatives much later to demand whatever it is they owe as children we didn't really see any of these unspoken rules because not much was expected of us at the time yes we might have been taught to be kind to strangers and respectful to our elders but generally we were also easily forgiven if we ever broke any unspoken rule but it's not the same for adults in fact the older we get the more rules get added to what we already have to follow as a child leaving a shopping cart in the middle of the grocery aisle could be considered cute but as an adult you won't be forgiven so easily as you get older people will also be less keen to borrow your things they bought their stuff with their own money and they expect you to do the same so as a general unspoken rule you never borrow stuff more than twice if you're borrowing it for a third time then you clearly need one of your own when you start living on your own you have to get important things like your furniture kitchen utensils and bathroom appliances however one thing you must never forget is a plunger and this is one of the only unspoken rules that's her personal benefit alone you should always buy a plunger before you need a plunger on your first day at a new job you're usually told how things work at the organization you're given a set of duties and responsibilities and you're educated on the culture of that office things you're allowed to do and things you're not allowed to do however there are a few things they don't include in the orientation speech like don't cook fish or anything that has the potential to smell terrible in the office kitchen be kind to the less skilled staff like the janitors and security guards and wait until everyone has gotten off the elevator before you get on it's rules like these that bind us together as a society if everyone and everything was put in a constitution we would be living like robots but i mean we basically already are by leaving many of these rules unspoken we're able to follow them more naturally because some things are better left unsaid today's video was sponsored by new a company aimed at helping people worldwide lead to healthier lives we all have things in life we want maybe it's a new car or a better job or even a healthy relationship however before we can attain these things there's one thing that we need to make sure is our number one priority our personal health both mental and physical without that we don't 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Channel: Aperture

Views: 463,803

Keywords: aperture, yt:cc=on, The Unspoken Rules of Society, unspoken rules, unspoken, rules, society, rules of nature, rules of society, social media, unwritten rules, unwritten rules of life, unwritten rules of society, social norms, social norms examples, psychology, social norms experiment

Id: f4qhjH54sqw

Length: 13min 8sec (788 seconds)

Published: Fri Jul 09 2021