The Return of Ceserac - Chapter One [Goldcrest]

gentlemen I want to welcome you to my humble home and thank you for agreeing to participate in my wonderfully and lovingly crafted Homebrew Dungeons and Dragons fifth edition campaign Trump Obama Biden and Bush welcome to the return of Cesar we really appreciate you having us here Sean I assume you've managed to fit us into your schedule now that You' finished up with knights of the zodiac oh yeah I assume you made a boatload of cash off that Trump take that stupid helmet off you sound weird fine fine anyway Sean I haven't watched it myself not my C te but definitely a smart business decision on your part you and your friends are most certainly welcome to be a Obama yes Trump I did make a decent pound off of the film now back to wait a minute who brought me to Shan Connor's house I thought he was dead oh fuddy duddy how did I get here I was literally just at Coldstone getting some chocolate chocolate chip waffle cone goodness Joe we literally picked you up from Coldstone 30 minutes ago before we headed over here I don't freaking understand how you can run a country when you forget something every other 3 hours as much as I'd like to get into all of the typical presidential nonsense we do have a session zero to get started gentlemen what's a session zero Obama I thought you said you ran Joe through the player's handbook technically yes I helped him set up his D and Beyond account and showed him how to open the digital players handbook then I pointed out the most important parts for him to read in hindsight I probably should have stayed and made sure he actually read it instead of taking a nap yeah hindsight is kind of a [ __ ] when it comes to Joe huh Barack hindsight is a [ __ ] for Barack when it comes to a lot of things Obamacare Joe as a vice president the surges in the Middle East now hold on a sec marrying a man named Michael okay we are done with that Sean let's get on with this session zero gladly so as I explained to you gentlemen over text message you will all be starting at level three what have you all chosen for your class also since we're starting at level three everyone here should have a subass regardless of the class they chose so what is your subass as well while you're at it give me your character's name and race if you don't mind oh oh I remember this part I'm playing a music man he's from a school that uses fancy words or something I'm also playing a goat man named Joel buckling so Joe you're playing a college of eloquence Bard you're also a Seder the shoe definitely fits I wouldn't be surprised if you had chosen the weirdest instrument possible anyway Sean I'm going to be playing a war forged artificer armorer named Bushmaster 2000 holy [ __ ] George if that name isn't on the damn nose I don't know what is you're literally One Singular number off of a really [ __ ] up reference however we are on to bigger and better things now I Donald J Trump am going to be playing a variant human Vengeance Paladin named Pax am Maradona his backstory revolves around avenging his loss in the Grand Arena to his arch rival rigus electionus because he mysteriously cheated somehow I knew we weren't going to make it an hour without you shoehorning in an election fraud power fantasy it can't be helped I guess Sean I'm going to be playing a fallen asmer aberant mind sorcerer hopefully I can keep our rabble glued together for this Campa well it at least sounds like the party is pretty solidly built support tank damage healing all the key elements seem to be in place did everybody manage to figure out the D and D Beyond interface pretty well that's a big Texas 104 of course I finally tuned the details better than anyone else at the table um yes the interface is pretty user friendly Joe Joe Joe Jiminy crickets you guys almost made me poo myself well if you were paying attention instead of trying to catch some z's maybe you wouldn't be filling up your depend Bush could you please not use a cell phone soundboard at the table okay yeah I apologize that was completely out of order all right so we're going to go over some key rules to remember during this Homebrew campaign Critical Hits during combat will have you roll your damage dice twice instead of the normal once we will not be using components for spells since you gentlemen are fairly new to the game a long rest cannot be taken whenever you want to an adequate amount of time must have pass or enough events must have happened for one to occur the money system will only use gold and silver I'm eliminating copper to make it easier to track for all of us also remember gentlemen your actions have consequences I'm not the type of evil dungeon master to kill you outright for wrong moves and such however constant Act of hobo murdering or complete ignorance can endanger you and the whole party if there's anything I missed here that becomes important later we'll go over it at that time in detail do you guys have any questions about standard mechanics or my home brew Creations so Mr connory how are you alive I'd like your secret to immortality I was certain that you had died a few years back Joe that's not Shawn connory that's Shawn Bean you know the same guy that played Boromir in Lord of the Rings ring a bell he played Ned Stark in Game of Thrones he's in the famous One does not simply walk into Mordor meme it's always an enjoyable time watching you do this with him so it's like watching a fat kid chase the ice cream truck and actually expect to catch it if that's not the pot calling the kettle I don't know what else it could be I'm not fat Bush I am Peak male performance anyways Sean I have some lore questions could you tell us a little bit about this world the overall history stuff we should know going into the campaign as our characters anything about the country or Nation we are starting in ah yes now that is a good question the world you gentlemen are in is called teria it is a world kind of like Earth but between fantasy and high fantasy the nation you are starting in is known as the Empire of alium the Empire is currently in what would be considered an early Twilight era it is not yet lost but it is most certainly fading without assistance as far as world law goes mhm 1,000 years ago on teria four Legendary Heroes Rose to resist a great evil they fought through a great deal of trials and tribulations to hold back this evil for as long as they could to buy time for their allies in the west however they could not hold this evil forever sharak Tyrant of chaos rose up on the far Northeastern continent of tiia he crushed the peaceful nation of Lon and gathered all creatures of hate and despair to his side he fought a long and brutal battle with the heroes of Legend eventually forcing them to retreat west across the sea back home upon Gathering his full strength he invaded the Western continent and pillaged another Nation Al ganil as the nations of the continent squabbled over what to do he built the Alex Spire which Drew its magical powers from the Heat and Chaos of the nearby volcano named the Blazing pinnacle after the nations of the western continent came together as the first concordat they marched to Aid the capital of Alon alost there the heroes of Legend reached their final chapter the accounts of what happened at the Battle of alost are muddled at best and completely lost at worst what is known for sure is that Cesar was defeated by the heroes of Legend the histories of the heroes following that they are mostly lost say for a monument or a burial site although teria lives in peace today the odd show of evil creature here and there across the world is causing fear to surface in the populace once more Whispers can be heard in seedy taverns thieves dens and banded enclaves Cesar returns however it seems that these warning signs are not noticed by the old nations of the first concordat or their government are just a large to notice at this point in time perhaps the rumors are just that though rumors the average citizen can only hope that the peace Remains the only fact that is known for certain about the heroes of Legend and the Battle of alost is that they Ed the mythical sword of creation to defeat cesak the historians claimed that the heroes were assisted by a being of Untold power only known by the name taram however this comes from a ripped page in the Diary of a soldier who claims he was there that day and the page is very damaged holy [ __ ] I thought I was coming to play some beginner Dungeons and Dragons I feel like you just sucked me through a portal into Middle Earth or something Boromir help please I need you to take these arrows for my small and frail body I'm only level three Bush we're only 9 minutes into the first episode sha Bean isn't allowed to die yet he has to make a certain time quota in each movie SL show he's in before he can die off yes yes very funny I die in the majority of films and shows I star in better buckle up on that one Sean they're going to keep hitting you with that [ __ ] bus off and on through the whole campaign that was so beautiful Shan Aston I'm going to write so many poems and ballads as a fancy music man in this game I honestly don't even understand how you've made that Bloody mistake with my name but Obama said you were the Shawn that acted in the Lord of the Rings right yes Joe but there's two sha acting in Lord of the Rings look we'll talk about it later and get this fixed up sorry about this Shawn yes definitely later indeed I'm going to have to make sure to bring a more open and patient mind for session one that'll conclude our session zero gentlemen I bid you a safe car ride back home I believe that's our cue to clean up and get out guys come here Joe I'm going to staple a [ __ ] poit note to your [ __ ] forehead with sha Bean's name on it Obama help he actually has a freaking stapler Trump stop I got three Big Max and two shakes in it for you if you give me the stapler all right Obama here's the stapler you got yourself a deal damn it Obama that was going to be some sweet ass world star footage and you ruined it [Music] [Applause] oh man that was freaking awesome what an absolute wonderful first episode hopefully you people outside the screen over there enjoyed what you saw who am I kidding of course you did it's me you're watching since you did enjoy what you saw with your eyes and heard with your ears hit that sub button smack that like button and smash that alert button you're not going to want to miss what paxim Maradona Cooks up in session one all right Joe before we go inside remember it's sha Bean not any other Shawn name nothing else just Shawn bean I really wouldn't want to make him feel disrespected in his own home again I've got the stapler and Post-it notes on standby Joe I'm not afraid to use them right in front of Shawn oh yeah I'm wearing a GoPro this session just in case this actually goes down not a chance I miss getting this crazy ass footage Trump please put the stapler away you're scaring me I promise you guys I won't mess his name up this time I want to play this session just as bad as you do all right Joe I'm trusting you however Pop Quiz what is Sea's last name beam his last name is Bean see I told you guys I would remember all right let's head in side then get ready guys today is freaking session one now the fun [Music] begins so gentlemen welcome back to my humble home I'm excited to have you back for session one as I'm sure you're also excited to be here for it more than excited Sean I'm absolutely ecstatic I'm so pumped after listening to some of that lore from session zero definitely agreeing with Bush on this one that was some epic lore in session zero absolutely Mr uh Mr uh come on Joe can do this you promised Mr [Music] Bean Mr Bean absolutely Mr Bean totally excited to be here ah damn it son of a [ __ ] he actually did it damn it you two are freaking ridiculous well we're off to a phenomenal start already I see I don't know what any of that was about but let's go ahead and hop into this session one Pax braa Bushmaster and Joel for various reasons you've all arrived in the quaint Village of gold Crest which resides in the Empire of elesium would you like me to give you lore reasons for why you're here or would you like to throw one out oh sure after losing to the cheating rigus electionus Pax of Maradona has come to Gold Crest to rest and earn some spare gold he used all his gold betting on himself to beat rigus election I would say Joel has arrived here as part of a local tour he's doing to increase his Fame as a Bard braa is here in pursuit of more knowledge of the depths considering this is an ocean Village his subass is tied to some rather eldrich things Bushmaster isn't sure why he is here he was just brought back online in a local Artisan's shop he can't remember anything very good I'm liking the roleplay participation and definitely the backstory info you're giving me to work with regardless of the means of which each of you have gotten to Gold Crest all of you have found yourself in the Local Tavern the saled dog what would each of you like to do do oh oh oh I want to speak with the barkeep about introducing myself and playing a tune for the tavern all right Joel you approach the front of the bar and see a friendly looking halfling standing on a stool behind the bar what do you say why hello there my small friend if I may I'd like to introduce myself to your establishment and uh Possibly play a tune to your patrons the halfling cast his gaze over to you and then glowers at you I'm afraid I'm going to have to refuse your request my lar friend I simply don't have time for BS in my establishment with such a rude demeanor adab boy Joe let that little piece of [ __ ] know how small he is in this world of big folk like us wait what what just happened Joe for a Democrat you're not too bright when it comes to hardle leaning things like diversity and acceptance I'm surprised he didn't want to smell the little guy's hair okay that's enough bashing on Joe Sean can I hear this going on since I'm also at the tavern it's the weekend and the tavern is somewhat full of patrons having a good time make me a perception check to see if you can hear Joel bookling conversation with the barkeeper over the bustle of the crowd all right yeah that's going to be a 12 braa while you're sitting at your table you can't quite hear what's being said but you do notice what seems to be a negative commotion going on in between the barkeep and a SATA fellow okay I go up to the bar and I interject I walk up to the bar and slam my hand down halfling are you refusing to serve this fine Patron because of his race role for intimidation of Maradona sorry braa because you guys are new I'm going to let players interrupt a little where I normally wouldn't let them all right dice don't let a midona down hell yeah that's a [ __ ] 18 the halfling barkeep stares up at a maradona's hulking size no no no sir The Bard is free to drink Merry and Play songs as much as they want in my establishment oh well thank you my small friend also thank you human fellow may I ask what your name is and you as well my dark friend in robes pause you're playing a fallen asamar Obama there is no pause there your skin is dark gray my name is paxa Maradona goat man you would do well to remember it I am famous throughout the land as an arena Champion now I expect compensation from your earnings tonight for getting you your silly Sing Song spot on the little stage up there hello my name is braa I was going to attempt to help you free of charge before Pax of Maradona jumped in and took over what is your name Sader nice to meet you Pax of Maradona and braa my name is uh Joel buckling I guess I could give you a little of tonight's earnings of Maradona if uh I even get anything that is Bush what are you doing while all this is going on you've been pretty quiet I've been observing this entire interaction from my table my character is driven by intelligence having just been currently brought back online he's collecting data on his surroundings however he's identified these three fellows as a possible contact point for getting him back on his feet and part of a adventuring group Bushmaster will approach the group and introduce himself as a Adventurer looking for a party to Quest with hello you three my name is Bushmaster 2000 as you can see I am War forged I'm currently looking for an adventuring group to Quest and make money with could that perhaps be a possibility with you three you know what that actually sounds like a great idea I could always use more funds for my studies I love parties sure I'll go with you guys to a party like I can sing and play my loot there if there's gold involved I'm in just to give you guys some pertinent information as long-standing citizens of alium you're all aware of the fact that almost all towns have notice and Quest or Bounty boards in town all right good good I'm midona Joel and Bushmaster do you guys want to try and go check out the board in town for a quest or Bounty sounds good let's head that direction maybe I'll see some sweet gnome or Goblin short stacks on the way there oh no well let's go Bushmaster you're committed to the group now the group exits out into the village streets you begin to make your way through various groups of people and pass the occasional traveling cart attempting to get to the town center where the quest or notice board should be as you're making your way through the market you are approaching by an elderly woman excuse me good sir you look like fine strapping lads who could handle themselves I've been looking for my husband for 4 days and haven't been able to find him have you seen him she shows you a crudely painted picture of an elderly fellow no I'm afraid I haven't seen this guy at all I'm sorry but I haven't seen him either ma'am perhaps we could look for him for you for a price of course our services don't come for free with braa and Bushmaster wow that looks like a painting of me Joe now's not the time the elderly woman looks up at the four of you and says of course of course I'd be willing to give my entire life savings just to find my dear sweet husband again I fear he might be dead say no more paxam Maradona is on the job where's the last place you saw him we could search for Clues the elderly woman approaches paxa mer donor and gently says I last saw him at our home I can take you Lads there and let you look for Clues sounds good my fair lady we can head that way with you now the group follows the elderly lady through the village for a few minutes until they reach a quaint looking home the flowers on the window sill on the outside haven't been watered in days and it looks like a couple of letters have been ignored well that's totally expected behavior for a woman going crazy about her missing husband I moved to go ahead and follow her inside couldn't give less a [ __ ] about flowers and letters let's find Joe's confused fart dementia brother and get paid this old lady's life savings we always have to consider the possibility that the old guy could have legitimately just have died somewhere quit speculating out of game and follow me inside and look for Clues the group heads inside together following the elderly woman once inside you see an oddly empty living room to the right is one door and to the left are two separate doors I asked the lady first for her name because we didn't get it earlier and second for the layout of the house and where in the house she saw her husband last she slowly makes her way over to you and says the door to the right is our simple bedroom on the left is the kitchen and storage room my name is Amelia I appreciate you asking I've felt so alone the past few days braa quit [ __ ] around come with me to search the bedroom for Clues Bushmaster and Joel go search the other two room for clues or something all right I go with a madona to search the bedroom for Clues I'll search the kitchen I guess I'll look through the storage room then all right something to keep in mind as you guys separate as I switch back and forth in between all of you keep in mind that everything is happening at the same time not one thing after the other anyways aerona and braa you guys arrive in the bedroom inside you see a simple straw mattress bed big enough for two people the sheets aren't on the bed a mediumsized chest sits at the foot of the bed on each side of the bed is a simple wooden nightstand with a drawer aside from those things the room has one swedo dresser and that's it I go look in the chest good Lord of Maradona can you not leave their things alone I'm going to go look for Clues around the bed the both of you notice as you move closer to the bed that you begin to smell a foul stench braa did you [ __ ] yourself or something I'm sure they have an ouse outside no you idiot the smell is coming from over here by the bed I go to check out the opposite side of the bed from braa what do I see Sean on the ground tucked up against the side of the bed seems to be two rather large humanoid sized lumps wrapped up in a large sheet what do you see a midona um bra I think we have a [ __ ] problem problem after am Merona says that to braa the both of you hear the door Creak and slam shut then the room seems to quickly fill with a magical Darkness pause now we go over to Joe Joe as you enter the kitchen it seems like a normal kitchen for the current time frame and LW setting nothing seems out of the ordinary except for the fact that it appears that nothing has been touched in quite a while um okay uh how do I do this I uh I want to try and figure stuff out about this room you're going to want to give me either an investigation or perception role Joe investigation will have you basically look for Clues and evidence perception will have you try to notice things that might be out of the ordinary okay I'll do perception then all right that's going to be a 12 for my perception Joe upon looking closer you notice that a film of dust has started to form over most the objects in this kitchen you you know that any living humanoid needs to eat food and whoever is living here isn't eating food oh uh that sounds Sinister who uh the old lady wait the Dead flowers outside the ignored letters the oddly empty living room in the middle of you passing out the information you hear a door creaking and a slam on the other side of the house pause now we go over to bush bush as you enter the storage room you notice that it is more half storage room half office inside is a bunch of wooden crates on one side and on the other is a small wooden desk with some drawers and a few ruffled papers on top of the desk okay well let's go have a look at that desk and the papers I move over to the desk and examine the papers on the top of the desk what do they say the papers seems to be various letters written back and forth between what seems to be the husband and an unknown person he complains about a series of onset headaches over the past few days and how his wife Sarah has been trying every home remedy in the book to help him out wait a [ __ ] minute I was in the living room when the old lady told braa that her name was Amelia these papers say her name is Sarah something isn't right here I need to go talk to braa and am Maradona as you discover these Revelations you hear a creaking and a loud slam on the other side of the house pause now we're back to braa and am Merona braa and am Merona as the magical Darkness clears the both of you turn towards the door to witness the elderly lady however your head hurts as you witness her Visage blur and you see her turn into an entirely different creature Obama Trump uh you stop but Obama please the creature Snickers at a midona as she can see he is most certainly a struck by her striking Beauty she softly and seductively begins walking towards am Merona you can have all you desire of me and more if you just submit to me you're such a handsome and strong man a meridon make me a wisdom saving throw hell yeah 19 on the D20 baby nobody questions the Donald's Infinite Wisdom minus the whz keep the dumb and add Asser shut the [ __ ] up Obama you're just jealous of all my sweet ass rolls oh yeah jelly rolls all right fat rolls is more like it [ __ ] off all of you I am supreme Crunch Wrap Supreme I am ultimate ultimate stuffed crust um I have the dominant roles of the group what happens now Sean the creature fails to charm you amarona both of you roll for initiative we won't be using the battle map since the two of you and the creature are in such close proximity [ __ ] I got a four that's a 12 for me not too bad the creature got an eight the initiative order will be a midona the creature then braa I will point out that both of you recognize this creature to be a succubus a Merida due to being a paladin and braa due to being a sorcerer the both of you are heavily aware of how dangerous being seduced by this succubus can be I rolled to Uno reverse the succubus uh midona it doesn't matter if you seduce her or if she seduces you if you mate with her she will suck out your soul and you'll be killed damn it she's so hot though well if I can't have her time to treat her like the thought she is time for some Smite all right am midona give me an attack and damage [Applause] roll that's going to be 19 to hit and 12 damage plus 15 radiant damage from the Smite and due to her being a fiend I'll use my bonus action to trigger a pole arm master and strike her with the opposite side of my glaive that'll be 10 to hit and seven damage a midona rushes The succubus and swings his mighty glaive his strike Rings true and hits the succubus she smirks for a split second as the glaive hits her and the slashing damage is hared due to being non-magical but then screeches in pain as the GLA glows with a Holy Light a tenth of a second later and smites her with Celestial energy Merona am midona twists slightly and swings the opposite end of the glaive at the succubus but she keenly Dodges being aware of how much pain a midona can dish out the succubus having already failed to charm a midona and fearing for its life looks towards braa and sends him a kiss and a wink my body every single inch of it could be yours all you have to do is submit to me braa give me a wisdom saving throw [ __ ] that's going to be an 11 sha please tell me that works out a merid dona you look towards braa as you witnessed the succubus say that his eyes change color and go Violet yes my queen I submit to you you are my everything you may take me I am yours God damn it braa you made me stop thinking about seducing this thot and now you're over there sing on your knees trying to crawl over and kiss her feet now we pause and go out into the living room Bushmaster and Joel both of you run out into the living room at the same time having realized that something is wrong after making separate odd discoveries and hearing a door slam holy [ __ ] what was that noise um uh it looks like it came from the bedroom we have to hurry up and get in there something weird is going on that old woman isn't who she says she is oh uh yeah the kitchen it's covered in dust I don't think that old lady eats you gentlemen hear the clang of a weapon and the whale of a screech woman [ __ ] we run to the door and open it you pull on it Bushmaster but it doesn't budge hurry up Bushmaster our new friends are in danger in there something bad is happening I cast catapult on the door itself interesting interesting I'll allow it you cast catapult on the door and rip it off its hinges sending it kening into the room it Rams into the succubus who was standing in front of the door roll the damage on the Catapult spell Bushmaster God damn only 12 damage a Merida you witness the door blow off its hinges and Kine across the room smacking the succubus across the back she barely avoids being knocked To The Ground by it Bushmaster and Joe you have both entered the bottom of the initiative order the order now reads as follows am Merona succubus braa Bushmaster Joel it'll now be Joel's turn then we'll reach the top of the round again keep in mind that each round is only 6 seconds worth of real time and all of your turns are actually happening at the same time I uh let's see here I guess I'll cast vicious mockery on the succubus she has to make a dc13 wisdom saving throw I also want to give uh a Maradona my bic inspiration since he's going to be up next very wise of you Joe very wise you realize that I'm the anchor that carries this group oh you're an anchor all right shut the [ __ ] up you succubus simp Joel attempts to mock the succubus with some vicious words but ends up stuttering and saying nothing he does however play a merry tune and a merid donor begins to feel a well of motivation to take the succubus down it is now the top of the round which means it is a Merida's turn all reactions have now refreshed all right I'm going to use my bonus action first and channel My Vow of enmity [ __ ] this silly succubus [ __ ] if she thinks she's going to give all her attention to braa over there she's wrong I'm the most handsome boy here now I roll to attack her with [ __ ] Advantage Smart Move On The Vow I rolled an eight and a 22 now I have a 12 for slashing damage and then 12 damage for the Smite so 18 damage in total with the haved slashing damage a midona approaches the succubus again he aggressively states to the succubus that she is an enemy of the natural order of the Prime material plain then mightily swings his glaive down upon her she screeches in pain as the celestial energy capitalizes on the original slashing damage blackish purple blood drips from under a piece of her armor and she wipes another stream of blood away from under her nose she slightly sways on her feet before Vanishing and then reappearing beside braa she moves to him and draws him in close she then brings him into a deep kiss [ __ ] I'm not from sh make me a constitution saving throat holy [ __ ] [ __ ] the D and D Gods shined on me at the right time natural [ __ ] 20 baby wow nice nice not only does the succubus fail to drain life from you and fail to recover herself braa but you instantly snap out of her charm pushing her away and getting some distance it is now your turn [ __ ] this [ __ ] she literally just tried to drain my soul and [ __ ] kill me to keep herself alive I cast witch bolt at second level that'll be a modded 20 to hit and 17 freaking damage Bara jumps back from the succubus after freeing his mind from her grasp lightning channels in between his hands and the room flickers before he snaps it and flashes it towards her in an incredibly violent AR the succubus is struck by the powerful and continuous bolt of lightning it courses through her body as she collapses to the ground spazzing and seizing her body begins to sizzle and Char she lets out a guttural screech until lightning and then a quick jet of fire and smoke shoot out her mouth her body then collapses limp to the ground smoking and lifeless holy [ __ ] I think the body is still cooking bua he gets the kiss and and the kill this is the worst [ __ ] day ever am Maradona I'm not sure you wanted that kiss I think that kiss almost killed him it almost did I could feel my life force trying to leave my body before I was able to break my mind free from her will well I guess we figured out what happened to the husband at least he went out with a bang figuratively metaphorically and factually but what happened to the wife then Sarah was her actual name found it on a letter in the storage slof office room her body is bundled up in some sheets with the husband in the bedroom on the back side of the bed the succubus has probably been luring people here to feed herself with that fake story if she was trying to feed herself she should have went for you not me a midona I'm a salad you would have been like a buffet shut the [ __ ] up braa you SED for that succubus so [ __ ] hard please Mommy I'm yours and you are mine take me this is going to be a really interesting first song to write about us especially baraka's part in all this Joel you better not say [ __ ] about what happened in here I didn't say anything about that succubus being Mommy I can just imagine it now Joel up on stage singing about braa sing for the succubus well that's a good job on that fight gentlemen I believe I'll conclude our session one there as it seems like a good stopping point in session two the party will deal with the aftermath of the battle with the succubus in the village make sure you level up to level four before you come back for session two I do wish you gentlemen a safe car ride home this evening sounds good I'm [ __ ] beat let's head to the car [Music] guys nobody and I mean nobody is the to tell Michelle about the succubus event okay never do you like that Obama you're my best friend too late Obama got it on the GoPro get the [ __ ] over here Bush I'll kill you run Bush I'm sitting on him get the footage to a safe [Music] place well that was a freaking great time I hope you've enjoyed session two with us here today we'd really appreciate it if you tickle all the buttons on the screen today clicking the like subscribe and alert buttons help the algorithm get our video out there to more fans of AI president Shenanigans we make these videos for your enjoyment and the more of you that see them the happier and more motivated we are to make them drop us a comment if you have any suggestions or questions and we'll try to get back to you in a timely manner Bush you absolute piece of [ __ ] I found that [ __ ] DVD in my mailbox with the GoPro footage on it you're lucky I got up early yesterday morning and found it before Michelle checked the mail damn we almost got him Trump next time you'll have to sneak in the house and put it in her panty drawer or something if I catch either of you ever in my house doing anything in Michelle's panty drawer you'll both find yourself waking up tied up naked and covered in butter in Clinton's basement Obama I thought nobody was supposed to know about the Clinton's being used as the black hole for unwanted people uh [Music] [Music] [ __ ] [Music] [Music] hello gentlemen welcome back for the next session I trust that you've had some time to think about your upcoming actions for this session anyhow brief announcement for you I've got some friends that have realized I'm doing Dungeons and Dragons again and asked to play but I had to reject them because of various reasons however I did tell them they could come to do NPC guest lines if they wanted one of them will be here shortly today oh that sounds really cool Mr Bean who's coming today one of your Lord of the Rings friends ah Joe I can't let the cat out of the bag that easy you'll see when I introduce him as the NPC he's playing I bet it's somebody hun yeah please tell me it's one of your Game of Thrones friends oh Sean I'll follow every plot hook you toss out if it's a Amia Clark and you wanted to try and dog me out last session for getting seduced by that succubus here you are sing for Amelia Clark I mean at least Amelia Clark is real the succubus was just a figment of the imagination nobody asked for your input Bush all right Gentlemen let's not get sidetracked Amelia Clark Trump [ __ ] Focus please bloody hell fine fine I'm sorry uh my bad so last we left off you guys had just finished off the succubus in the house Bush you're all now standing around her freshly cooked corpse in the bedroom of the house well uh we should probably report this to the guards or something maybe maybe not they might think we killed the old couple or something a madona there's absolutely no way the guards will think we killed this old couple if anything they'll recognize that we finally stopped this Menace and possibly reward us oh a reward I could buy some new paper to write my new song the S and the succubus [ __ ] you Joel buckling if you write that song I'll personally send you to the deeps I changed my mind this is now a win-win situation I pack some Maradona will personally escort us all to the guard house to inform them of what happened and get us a nice reward as you guys are coming to a conclusion on what you're going to do you hear a clattering at the front door and footsteps coming in you hear someone yell gold Crest guard show yourselves [ __ ] never mind bad plan I roll to push Obama into the main room you racist ass [ __ ] lies it has nothing to do with your race Obama you just have such a rich vocabulary and you're such an eloquent speaker Obama do you allow this to happen or are we doing opposing roles whether he's lying about the first part or not he's not lying about the second part I'm charismatic as [ __ ] I'll allow him to push me out my character probably wouldn't expect it or have the strength to resist after the fight anyway Obama give me a dexterity saving throw to see if you trip and fall or catch yourself and remain standing when a Merona pushes braa out into the main room uh that'll be a 16 Shan well done right after the group hears the guards call out into the house am Merona inches himself behind braa and positions himself as such to push braa out the door out in the main room the guards suddenly witness a fallen asimar in red and black sorcerer robes stumble out into the main room and catch himself without fall calling the guard calls out halt you state your name your business here and what has happened Villages reported sounds of violence and flashing Through the Windows hello sir my name is braa me and my companions were lured here by a succubus posing as an elderly lady who lost her husband and was seeking help she revealed herself to us in the house and tried to kill us for sustenance the noises of violence was the battle and the flashing was my witch bolt that killed her her body is in the bedroom with my companions the body of the couple that used to live here is also in the bedroom and based off your explanation an offer of proof right around the corner you have put the guard's mind at ease just enough for him to trust you he approaches you and says that's quite the story Adventurer let's have a look at this succubus body all right I wave him to follow me and lead him into the bedroom I point him towards the charred body of the succubus and say there she is all cooked up he stares at the body and says by the one God you weren't lying maybe this is what's been responsible for the occasional disappearance of a villager here and there for the past week we'll take care of everything here the captain will want to hear about this from you guys one of the guards will take you there you aren't in trouble thank you for taking care of this he waved aves in another guard and tells him to take you to Captain Ironstone the other guard hollers for your attention and asks for you to follow him well looks like everything turned out in our favor CE nothing to be afraid of a midona I wasn't scared I have no problems dealing with the law we're the good guys says the guy who grabbed the first minority he could find and yeed him out the room I'll teach you the true meaning of Yeet if you don't leave it be Bushmaster yeah I'm sure you will you'll head over to the local Ye Old Tavern and Order Whole Hog then proceed to Yeet it down your gullet oh I never got to play at the tavern I forgot about that shut the [ __ ] up braa I'm going to personally fund Joel's the S and the succubus song and protect him from your reprisals ah I appreciate that amarona no problem little goat man we'll see if that's where your hard-earned gold actually goes am Maradona well you guys shut the hell up the guard is waiting on us okay yeah let's follow the Guard the guard quickly escorts you through the village and to the guard house it's not much more than a Barracks with a medium-sized office and jail attached to it the guard who escorted you asked you to wait a second while he goes and fetches Captain Ironstone I wonder if we'll get any sort of reward for taking down the succubus that one guard made it sound like she may have been responsible for more than a few murders I'd imagine we would if the captain has any sense of Honor we took care of something that wasn't even on their scrier we better get a reward braa almost died and I had to wail on that thing and not even in the real fun way I mean it was a fun way but not the fun I really wanted to have with her uh and you want to call me the S as you gentlemen are talking you hear some footsteps cross the corner and a deep accented voice begins speaking so these are the Mighty Heroes I've been told about that killed the succubus that had apparently murdered the old Smithers couple holy [ __ ] holy [ __ ] holy [ __ ] H what's going on it's [ __ ] all right come on guys I'm here for some fun not to get fan girl to death keep it in your pants gentlemen this is our guest for the session he'll be voicing Captain Ironstone as you've probably already deduced my apologies Mr niss big fan nice to meet you uh anyways back in game I looked at Captain Ironstone yes I single-handedly fought the succubus while my companion braa had to fight through her seduction he almost had his soul sucked out by her through a kiss hey I smashed a door over her back don't leave me out oh yeah I was there too I uh inspired a midona to fight on yes and as soon as I snapped out of her charm I roasted that [ __ ] with lightning until she was dead I softened her up for you for quite a bit uh most of the work really I mean hell Bushmaster got her with the door by the time you got to her she was bleeding out her nose and from under her armor you probably could have thrown your floppy hat at her and killed her well regardless of how you made it happen The Village thanks you we had no idea such a dangerous creature was here there's no telling how many more people it could have murdered if it hadn't had been for you adventurers we'll have to investigate further to see how many disappearances it was responsible for well sounds like we've done a great service for the village and Country reward ah yes I do suppose a reward is due if we had known the creature existed a bounty would have been posted for such a dangerous a creature as a succubus 120 gold would have been posted I'll have a Clark fetch it from the back you see Captain Ironstone wave over a small and frail looking Clark he hurriedly walks off into the back and quickly returns struggling to carry a hefty Brown Sack He Flops it down onto the desk in front of Captain Ironstone oh yeah that's what Daddy of midona is talking about closest Tavern here I come prepare the goblin short stacks I continue to be appalled at that line of thought that's that's just the tip of the iceberg you know cuz he is an iceberg [ __ ] you Joel I'm not funding your song anymore I walk up to grab the bag we appreciate the reward Captain Ironstone is there anything else we could do for you the only thing the guard is tracking is a bounty placed by the blacksmith something about goblins in the mine weird there hasn't been goblins in the region for hundreds of years having a succubus turnup was already seriously unnerving and we'll have the Village fearful for a decade the Goblins will only exaggerate this problem I would appreciate it if you also handled this yes reward yes uh what was your name Paladin I assume Pax of Maradona is my name ah gotcha well Paladin am Maradona yes there is a reward for the blacksmith's Bounty but it comes from him not from the guard so you'll need to discuss it with him I'd also advise going and registering with the adventurer's guild before taking his quest posting completions of the quests with the adventurers Guild can be quite lucrative I hear now that sounds like a good deal I'd like to head straight to this Guild after we're done here I agree I pick up the bag and thank Captain Ironstone a final time I beckon the rest of the party to follow me outside farewell adventurers I do hope we meet again and in better Tidings than goblins and fell demons the party emerges back out onto the dirt streets of the village of Goldcrest uh we didn't get directions to The adventurer's Guild I'm sure if we just head into the center of the village we'll find it the party makes its way into the center of the village of goldest it just so happens that braa was correct the adventurers Guild is the second largest building in town however that isn't saying much it was easily picked out by the Taxidermy monsters on the front porch hey guys I think that's it over there that building with the funny looking animals on the porch nice eyes Joel let's head over there and see what this place has to offer the party enters the adventurer's guild the Taxidermy heads of different monsters can be seen on the walls in this small and interesting office all of a sudden the manager of the establishment appears before you a towering half elf with bulging muscles he has an extremely strong jawline and some scars on his face he says to you welcome wel new adventurers we don't see many new applicants in Gold Crest on account of it being so far out of the way and all that holy [ __ ] that's a big boy big boy indeed I step up to him and offer my hand for a handshake while introducing myself he takes your hand with enthusiasm Bara will need to roll a strength saving throw oh [ __ ] I rolled a five he grips your hand with the strength of a seasoned Warrior and adventurer maybe a little too seasoned you feel your hands strain a little under the pressure and you take one bludgeoning damage I winse a little and try as hard as I can not to show the pain on my face give me a performance role to hide the pain on your [Music] face get wrecked Obama you've got to be [ __ ] kidding me well um in your attempt to hide the pain on your face you try and bite your tongue however you bite it a little to hard and cause it to cut and bleed a little blood runs out of your mou mouth and A Tear runs out of both your eyes the big half elf stares down at you with a peculiar look of curiosity he looks over at Joel is your friend all right he's uh bleeding from the mouth and crying sorry he's probably still suffering some sort of Mind issues from being Charmed by that succubus I am Paladin am Maradona it's a pleasure to meet you we were recommended here by Captain Ironstone after defeating a succubus that had murdered the Smithers uh couple and possibly more people we wish to register an adventurers party he looks over to you and says n wonderful I'll get the necessary paperwork drawn up it's been quite some time since I've registered a whole new party reminds me of many years ago when I joined my first party ah those were the Glory Days I'm long past that time now I'm quite enjoying my nice and peaceful retirement here in goldest oh so you used to be an adventurer were you famous did you ever have any bards write songs about you that I would have heard or no he looks over at Joel while stacking up some papers on the desk well my name is adavar back then I was called adavar orc Ripper the name is a long story for another day though if you hear that name in a song then it's most likely about me I don't know any other adavar the orc rippers out there he looks back over at a Merona anyways a succubus you say my goodness how in the world did one of those show up that's a creature that hasn't been seen in hundreds of years things have been getting rather odd lately lots of creatures turning up that haven't been seen in ages people are starting to talk about old Legends of Forgotten dark Lords and stuff I try to keep my nose out of hearsay though I wipe the tears from my face and the blood from my mouth and speak up old Legends of dark Lords you say interesting do you know anything more about this he turns his head to braa no like I said uh I Tred to keep my nose out of things like that adventuring was a simpler thing in my time the concordat museum in Citadel the city along the road to the Northeast would have the information you seek well all the paperwork is in order could I get all your proper names then a party leader and a party name to write down and register you under yes yet I am paxam Maradona the Paladin the one in the robes is brocka the sorcerer the one with the loot is Joel buckling The Bard and the metal one over there is Bushmaster 2000 the artificer I paxa Maradona am the party leader now wait a freaking minute here he looks at a midona awesome everything sounds good if you could all appr roach the book and sign below your names please I walk up and sign my autograph as fancy as I can ah whatever I go up and stamp my War forged Mark I quickly go up and sign my name nice and large oh yeah because you are nice and large makes sense shut the hell up Joel or I'm going to put a large hole upside you forgetful ass head so we're all just going to sit here and let a Maradona swoop in and be the party leader no discussion no debate just a Maradona is the party leader what can I say brocka my campaign was short but successful the slogan was phenomenal I borrowed it straight from the armored boot store in my old Hometown just do it except I changed it to just a merido yeah well it should have been just a merid donut ah a meridon nut nice damn it now you've made me think of bar snacks which made me think of the tavern which made me remember that I once again forgot that I need to play in The Tavern damn it you'll get to play eventually Joel we'll get you there little buddy I promise hurry up braa and sign the damn paper we have things to do fine but when things go wrong I'm going to remind the two of you whose fault it is that amarona is the one who's making the decisions I go up to the paper and sign my name begrudgingly avadar looks down at all of you good good now what is to be the party name well uh interesting anybody got any ideas um well how about magic Missile it's like the D and D version of drone strike [ __ ] you Bush anybody have any actual ideas fresh out here I'm drawing a blank let's see here something bad ass uh I got it but Eagles Talon I I don't want to give it to you I'm not usually Petty but damn it oh come on Bara give it to him it's a good one yeah Bara give it to him ha shut the [ __ ] up with your ouse humor Bushmaster okay a Maradona fair is fair it's not a bad name at all all right avadar Eagle's Talon is the name of the party he looks to braa awesome I'm loving the name cool now that you're registered a quick explanation of the benefits you guys will currently be registered at iron tier which is the starting tier progressing to higher tiers with greater benefits is reliant on completion of quests at greater difficulties it's no secret that all within the the adventurers Guild aspire to be great Heroes The Guild was founded by Paladin UT one of the original Heroes of Legend So the greater your Deeds the faster you progress as he briefs you on the guild process all four of you your vision begins to go blurry and you black out each of you individually experience a rapid flash of different Visions you see a great destruction rought upon the world of tiia you see great battles fought upon Smoke Filled Plains black banners on one side and multiple different colors on the other you see the capital of elisium funist lies in Ruins and on fire a Darkness envelops the world and it seems that there is nothing left but sadness and despair the final red doubts of Hope finally fall the last vision is that of a column of magical fire shooting up out of a black Spire into the sky it strikes a point in the sky and the planet is lost in a magical detonation all of these Visions quickly pull themselves in Reverse you hear a voice echo through the darkness seek me out Heroes you are chosen do not listen to his messages or believe his Visions this world is not yet lost as he finishes speaking you see a bright flash you see a fract sword floating above a pedestal its pieces lining up to almost connect you quickly come back to reality and your vision returns it appears a davar just finished his brief on the guild so yeah that'll pretty much conclude the brief on all the benefits being a member of The Guild has to offer here's a pamphlet in case you need a reminder you new members have any questions [Music] adavar looks at the whole party visibly Disturbed well I uh I've never had that type of reaction to my brief on Guild benefits before did I do something wrong no no everything is fine we had a slight magical function but uh everything's perfectly all right now we're fine we're all fine here now thank you how are you I'll uh I'll be right [Music] back are you sure uh is he going to be okay he's uh coughing some up in the back office yeah and that one is just making weird noises on the ground I'll uh I'll try and help him out I'll uh go into my files and try and refine my benefits brief some obviously something is wrong with it adventurers who defeated a succubus shouldn't have the anxiety to be overwhelmed by a simple boring brief I'll head into the back office and send your Paladin friend back out you guys should go check up on that blacksmith Quest depending on the tale of its completion you could get bumped to Steel tier since you've already defeated a succubus yeah we'll uh we'll go get that done adavar walks into the back office and quickly returns with amarona one arm slung over his shoulder helping him back out into the lobby here's the Paladin he's slightly Delirious I suggest you guys make a quick stop outside for some fresh air to collect your yourself me and Bushmaster collect Joel in a Maradona we then head outside to try and get some fresh air and recover the party exits back out onto the dirt streets of Goldcrest braa has recovered from his coughing fit and Bush Master's intake modulator has debugged properly however a merid donor is still delirious and Joel is still unconscious braa do you have any magic to help deal with this whatever the hell that was clearly messed with these two's Minds a little harder than us I don't have anything that I think would help them the only thing I have for this that might work as calm emotions although that might only work on a midona since he's conscious give it a rip maybe a Maradona will have something for Joel he's got holy magic uh my head H that feels better Jesus what the [ __ ] was that did you guys see that Holy [ __ ] I couldn't control what I was feeling I felt so overwhelmed I just started puking and then I blacked out in that guy's office we don't know but I'm pretty sure we all saw the same thing based on our reactions do you have anything to get Joel up oh yeah let me pop his ass with lay on hands that'll probably bring him up from the shock of it alone there we go you owe me one you were about to take the Eternal nap old man the Great am midona brought you back from the precipice with the great weight of his holy power more like the great weight of his fat hands as he leaned on him too hard and almost crushed him to death I wonder if rigus electionus possibly just beat you in the Arenas just by running in circles until your fat ass was tired don't worry brocka and Bushmaster I'll remember this for later anyway Joel is up guys I had the most [ __ ] up dream it wasn't a dream Joe I'm pretty sure it was a vision we all got it everybody saw battlefield for Hest in ruins the planet exploding a voice talked to you and then a fractured sword right yep yep uh yeah okay so we all saw the same thing then I don't think we'll find any answers in this small village for this Vision the voice said to seek him out whoever he is maybe there's somebody in the city out ofar mentioned that can help uh uh Citadel I think he called it we can head there after we finish up that blacksmith's Quest sounds like a fair enough plan to me also braa how about you split up that coin purse that you snatched off captain Iron Stone's desk oh yeah upgrade money oh new instrument here I come oh yeah uh almost forgot we got 120 total so each of us will be getting 30 almost forgot my ass I caught you sliping brocka you were trying to pocket that coinage some of us aren't money hungry [ __ ] of Maradona hey I'm not money hungry um what nothing don't worry about it a Maradona let's head to the blacksmiths the party winds its way through the people in Town Square until they reach the blacksmith whoever the blacksmith is they have a nice and quaint shop that the party goes ahead and enters upon entering the blacksmith the party can hear the clangs of a blacksmith at work however it sounds like he's in the back after just a few swings though the clangs stop all of a sudden a Dwarven blacksmith pops up right in front of you well how are you we Lads doing today what can I be doing for you we're here to deal with your Goblin mind problem we just got done speaking with Captain Ironstone actually well that's the best thing I heard all day okay I think we're going to have a problem here shut the [ __ ] up and be respectful Bushmaster Captain Ironstone had mentioned that we needed to come to you for all the question info and the reward info so let's figure all that out ah ah then sounds like a good idea so the Goblins infested the mine about a week ago they kill it a few Miners and the rest flip we haven't been able to get any metal Zoots in from what I've been TT there's between five to 10 goblins and a leader the local mining Guild is afin one Hunter and 50 goal for the problem Ty be dealt with so uh I heard goblins Min a leader and 10 and something gold [ __ ] it we accept my brain can't handle more of that handle more of what he's got a really thick accent Joe I got no clue what you're talking about he said that the mine was infested about a week ago a couple of miners got killed and the rest fled there's somewhere between 5 to 10 goblins and a leader and that the local mining Guild is offering 160 gold for a reward for clearing the the place out I mean he was pretty clear and concise what in the absolute [ __ ] I can't I I [ __ ] can't right now my head hurts even worse and I can we please go to the tavern and rest it's been a really [ __ ] day let's just take care of the goblin mine tomorrow in a moment of rare solidarity I agree with the Maradona let's go shack up in the tavern for tonight and rest and recuperate we'll storm the goblin mind tomorrow refreshed and renewed [ __ ] agreed Oh yay I can go play at the tavern now so so the party bids farewell to the blacksmith and meanders through town to the Local Tavern would you guys like to interact or simply get your rooms for the night and hit the hay getting a room no interactions same thing yeah no interactions here my brain has had enough for today I'd like to play get a room you guys are so mean I go to get a room Sean with everyone getting a room everybody please deduct four silver from your inventory however gentlemen with that interaction we have found our session's end point prepare your minds for next session gentlemen the mine might get rough who knows I wish you guys a safe car ride home more than happy to reach an end point now let's head to the car I need some aspirin or something after all [Music] that hey uh you guys mind if we swing through the Taco Bell drive-thru on the way home Crunch Wrap Supreme Joe please I'm vulnerable I just need to stress Eed it's okay Trump we all have our vulnerable moments uh you deserve them too even if you are a [ __ ] a lot of the time thanks Obama you really mean that no [ __ ] [ __ ] you just got [Music] yeah you just got [Music] got uh okay can you turn the screen more to the left thank you start of line hello everyone thank you for watching we would appreciate it if you would click the like subscribe and alert buttons also leave a comment if you have any ideas questions or feedback we will get back to you as soon as possible we've recently started a Discord Channel as well the link is in the description of this video and also on the channel page thanks for watching End of Line all right guys I'm going to need everyone to forget that taco belt trip after last session it wasn't real and it didn't happen I won't mention it Donald I honestly kind of feel bad for what I said I wasn't acting myself n that was comedy gold Trump everybody is fair game here you can't Dome everybody in the group and then think you're special Bush forget it happened and I'll cash app you 10 grand forget what happened now that's what I call a team player um I um I'm not going to forget it Trump wow Joe look a youthful looking person with freshly washed hair in their holding an ice cream cone with well look at that I think the flavor is chocolate oh oh where where oh I'm sorry you missed it Joe what were we talking about again oh Dad git I forgot yeah oh yeah that's what I [Music] [Music] thought [Music] [Music] all right gentlemen welcome back to the table hopefully you guys talked at some point when you were together about how you wanted to accomplish this session's goals regardless I do believe that this is going to be a fun one oh I think I'll be able to lead us through the mine pretty well Sean it's just some goblins after all what's the Worst That Could Happen getting stabbed crushed by mind collapse toxic gases poisonous snakes deep holes concealed by standing water tunnel flooding getting lost and starving to death hypothermia infectious diseases you're a lard ass crushing me as we walk up an incline and you slip and fall all right all right I get it Jesus [ __ ] you guys the majority of what you said is even relative stabbing in cave-ins seem like the most likely problem um I think your lard ass is pretty relative like probably the most dangerous thing on the list my ass shouldn't be on a list Joe you should be I'm just going to say you guys are in the hallway outside your rooms after your well-deserved rest at the tavern this is what you're actively discussing as you congregate and decide how to begin the day all right well let's get our [ __ ] together and head out to this mine no no we have time you guys have screwed me over for too long now I demand to play at least one song in The Tavern this morning it's not going to cost us anything to let me do it Joel the morning after a night of heavy drinking isn't exactly the time that people want to hear a fledgling new Bard play their untested Tunes now wait a minute braa I'm sure that Joel could bring some wonderful entertainment to this morning oh oh you know what it sounds sounds like a plan Joel let's head down to the tavern and let you jingle a tune for this morning's fine patrons who are nursing off last night's hangover I'm sure your wonderful Melodies will Spirit their illnesses Away Joe don't Sean I quickly cast command on braa all right Trump Obama make a wisdom save and throw oh you've got to be kidding me uh fine that's a 14 Sean that'll succeed Obama Bara successfully beats a madonas i silvery barbs baraka's saving he has to roll it again Joe what the [ __ ] you're not going to stop me from playing in The Tavern you snake in the grass oh man what a turn of events well Obama go ahead also Sean since it's a bonus action I'd also like to unsettling words braa I will play in the tavern Joe for your information that's not how that works you were using your reaction just now and it wasn't your turn however we're not in combat so since I'm curious uh I'll allow this for now this is [ __ ] Joe you're only [ __ ] yourself whatever Sean that's going to be a natural 11 minus 6 from the unsettling words to make a five Trump what does a midona command Bara to do as he attempts to speak to Joel in that moment oh it's a really simple command Sean and it's not a big deal I simply say silence as braa attempts to speak the party Witnesses a mered donor turn to him and simply say silence braa doesn't proceed to say anything for the rest of you it simply seems as if braa might be taking a Merida's role as the party leader more seriously now well Joel let's get downstairs and get you jingling a tune the barkeep already told a Maradona that you're welcome to play and make Mary all you want the party makes their way down into the main floor of the tavern the main floor is somewhat populated with a patron here and there they all seem to be in some sort of hung over State eating breakfast or drinking water doing anything they can to just to try and get some Solace from the pounding headache am Merona Bara and Bushmaster take a seat at a table in the middle of the room whilst Joel takes his position on the little corner stage sh I want to turn my head and throw a dirty ass glance back at the halfling bartender you turn your head back and see the halfling bartender wide ey in panic he's looking at Joel on the stage then back at The Hungover patrons at the tables you can tell he fears the reactions that are about to take place Sean can I cast sacred flame on my fingertip to get his attention but not fire it off like I'm lighting a flip lighter yeah I'll allow that all right so I cast sacred flame on my fingertip in a real quick flicker to get his attention once our eyes meet and make contact I give him a real dirty look can place my hand on the handle of my glaive on my back the halfing makes eye contact with you you can infer from his even wider eyes now that he immediately remembers your previous interaction you can see him slightly slump on the bar counter and place his face in his hands almost as if sobbing I turned back around satisfied ready to watch Joel all right Joel go ahead and tell me what you do on the stage then give me a performance role based on what you tell me I may tell you to roll with ad advantage or disadvantage oh good I sit down on the little bar stool Sean I take out my trusty Loot and quietly ensure that it's finely tuned without disturbing the fine listeners once I feel confident that I'm finely tuned I'll clear my throat and take a sip from my water skin then I'll begin to play a soft Melody with a gentle rise and fall of notes my lyrics will speak of the wonderful beginnings of our party and slowly transition to our arrival in Gold crest I'll very lightly pick up my tune as I speak of our walk through the market and run in with a sweet elderly lady I'll drop into a deeper and slower thrum as I pick away at my Loot and attempt to beguile the crowd with the tale of our party being tricked by a succubus I'll pick up my Pace but keep the lower thrums as I titilate the crowd with the tale of the simp and the succubus and the great Heroes am Maradona Joel and Bushmaster who came to his and then I'll pan back out into a merry but middle paced jaunt as I finish off with a quick whip of how the tail ends with a happy ending of a mystery solved and a town saved well then wow Joe go ahead and roll Joel's performance role with Advantage my high rooll is a 25 Shan as Joel finishes his song he looks out on a small mourning crowd in various states of emotion some enthralled some with a slight teary eye even a few standing ovations the halfling bartender in the back stands behind his bar in an utter State of Shock around half the patrons make their way up to the stage and drop coins on the lip of the stage well I'll be damned that was that was beautiful I've been forever Remembered in the anals of history now I um uh thank you for hitting me with silence I know the intentions were bad at first first but this couldn't have turned out any better Joel the halfling bartender walks up to you sir I want to apologize for any foul Behavior I've laid at your feet Not only was I blind to your talent but I was also blind to the heroics you and your party would bring to our humble Village I will make sure that all who pass through my quaint Tavern know of your song and tail please take this as a token of my gratitude and as my apology I've kept it for years years as a tool to make my life easier but I believe it will serve you and your adventuring companions better he takes your hand and places a decent sized brown bag in it then walks back to his bar solemnly as he walks back towards the bar sha I raise my voice to him and say thank you my good friend I will cherish this humbly given gift then I will walk back over to my friends and party as Joel returns I'll pop a hand on his shoulder and tell him well done goat man you may keep all of your earnings I want none of it you earned it all to yourself with that beautiful performance Sean how much money did I collect off the stage once finally finished counting it looks like you managed to snag a whole 12 gold off the tiny hungover morning crowd quite a large amount considering the circumstances oh very nice Joel what's in the bag the halfling gave you uh I opened the bag Sean when Joel looks in the bag all he sees is an infinite Inky black void the enchant ing NeverEnding emptiness of the internals of the bag seemed to draw him further into a captivated state of awe never has Joel ever laid eyes upon such magnificent objects such as this the magical theories that Joel currently has running through his head to attempt to understand the mathematical phenomenon occurring before his eyes are endless if only he could Joel It's a bag of holding stop staring at it like you found an enchanted mythical loot or something oh sorry I guess I just got caught up on how weird the inside of the bag looks well that'll be good to help carry any supplies in and any loot out of the mine when we're done dealing with the goblins you still keep rambling about these supplies that we really don't need a Maradona just humor me and let me personally buy us some supplies at the general store before we head out you won't have to spend a penny fine fine I'll agree to this let's head to the supply store so the party makes its way through the village to the general supply store upon entering the vibrant smell of various different odds and ends wafts into your nose the senu of rope the grains of wood and all sorts of Oats salts dried jerkies and other common supplies behind the counter you see an all to Common race of alium a simple human he makes eye contact and hits you with a simple warm smile how may I help you find fellows today I stride to the front of the party Sean hello sir we've taken on the quest from the town blacksmith to clear the mine of goblins and have come to take stock of ourselves and our equipment before we head out I have a couple ideas myself of things we might need however I was hoping as someone who might commonly sell supplies to the miners you might have some recommendations as to things we should take with us to delve the mine he gives you a keen look for a few seconds then begins well then friend you'd be correct I do commonly sell supplies to the miners well I did before they shut down good of you to come ask you'll probably be wanting some torches as I doubt the lit ones from the miners are still going you also might want some rope I have no idea if the minecart bridges are still intact down there that they use I also still have some of their alchemical explosives that they use to clear deeper passages into the mine I doubt you would need it for that but you might need it to clear your way out if a m shaft collapse happens other than that you'd know better what you need for combat related things I feel like all those are good recommendations as far as combat related things go I believe we'd only want to inquire as to your inventory of health potions if you have any indeed I do but it's only a small stock we're just a simple V Village so I don't bring much in on trade I have five potions of healing in stock nothing special I know they're 25 gold a piece all right give me one moment to converse with my companions Sean I relay all this information to the party so do you guys have any of this stuff already or anything that can stand in the place of it I have a crowbar a hammer 10 patons a 50 ft of rope 10 torches and a Tinder Box I have that same kit but I also have the jump spell it can triple our jump distance so that might come in handy for something um the only semi-useful thing I have is a candle I do have Mage hand though I can grab and manipulate stuff 30 ft away I can also make one of us invisible if I need two I got rope torches and a Tinder Box other than that I'm going to destroy all the pesky goblins looks like we really didn't need to come by here we already have the Torches and the Rope well hold on I was thinking we should at least grab a healing potion and one of those alchemical explosives we got no way out if the mine collapses I'll agree on the explosive I don't have anything to clear Rubble yet however Joel and am Maradona both have quite a lot of healing magic I don't think we need the potion all right fine we compromis there then I approached the counter again Sean all right sir how much for one of those alchemical explosives he turns back to you and looks at you with Annoying grin pH one of those is going to run you around 50 gold friend they're quite the industrial trinket o I don't have the gold for that but I told a Maradona this was going to be at my expense I'm going to try and persuade him down Sean look sir I don't quite have that much gold I don't think anybody is going to be buying any of these anytime soon unless we clear out this mine I'd also like to not go bankrupt buying something to try and help bring a lot of your business back to you do you think you could do me a favor and help me out with the price on that go ahead and give me a persuasion rooll Obama ah thank God that's a 16 shot he looks down at the counter towards the alchemical explosive then back at the pile of mining supplies that have sat and collected dust for a week he sigh and then turns to you I suppose you make a point friend it wouldn't be right of me to scalp you on a price while you're doing good by me and bringing a lot of good business back to my store I do need something off you for the explosive so that I can take something home tonight business has exactly been easy since the mine closure however you can have the alchemical explosive for only 15 gold think of it as a favor for helping keep my shop from possibly going under in the future I gladly accept the deal from him Sean thank you for the favor sir I promise that we'll have that mind cleared out your business will be back to normal here soon with that I turn back to the party with the explosive and let them know we're good to head out well good we have br's little trinket now let's let's get to Stepping uh I'd like to get close to the mine before it starts to get dark so we can scout the outside so the Party heads out of the General Store and out of town the trip down the dirt path that leads through the woods towards the mine is uneventful after about 6 to 7 hours you begin to see an opening at the end of the path in the woods you can clearly tell it probably means the mine is nearby everybody get into the woods to our right let's start creeping up to the edge of the Woodline and scout out what's ahead everybody give me a stealth roll as you creep up to the edge of the Woodline oh [ __ ] I got a five I got a damn four cuz I have disadvantage um I got an eight I also got a four because of disadvantage aren't we just the stealthiest bunch of morons like a bunch of drunk people in the woods despite the party's best efforts to be subtle as they approach the wood line it couldn't be anything more different than subtle braa stubs his toe on a rock and Yelps Joel Clips his hoof on a Mossy branch and Falls his loot making a loud twang Bushmaster is just heavy as hell as a war forged he's stomping towards the Woodline as if he was a living vending machine and a Merida's glaive on his back seems to get caught on every single thing in existence he can't help but get aggravated and curse every other time it happens he thinks he's doing it under his breath but he's not when the party reaches the edge of the wood line everybody does indeed see the entrance to the mine however right as you get there you also see two goblins coming outside to inspect the area obviously alerted to all the weird noises outside in the woods everybody be quiet and wait for them to go back inside Trump give me a stealth role to see if you effectively communicate that with the party and remain undetected H [ __ ] dice don't screw the Donald now I give a midona baric inspiration [Applause] oh thank God I'll save your bar dick inspiration for later Joe I rolled a 17 Sean awesome a meridon a very quietly gets the party's attention and hands signals to everybody to stay quiet and wait for them to retreat back inside it takes about an hour for the two centries to abandon the more alert status and head back inside but they eventually do all right Sean we're going to get up to the mine entrance and start making our way in okay everybody give me another stealth roll this time with Advantage due to it getting closer to evening time and due to the fact that the goblin sentries just stared at the woods for a whole hour and saw nothing so they're not paying as much attention nice that'll be a 21 for me so the advantage canceled out my natural disadvantage and made my role normal however uh sorry guys that'll be a nasty natural one for me well that's probably made my amazing natural 20 not matter now the advantage cancels my natural disadvantage and I got an eight well the good news is you guys were rolling for a group average of stealth Joel's natural 20 is going to cancel out Bush Master's natural one bracka 21 will meet a mer donor's eight and give you guys a pretty decent group stealth check so as the group makes it's way up to the mine entrance Bushmaster stumbles on a rock and almost Falls with a clatter but Joel manages to Glide across the ground without making a sound using Mage hand to assist himself in catching you he successfully averts disaster for the party in his Adept use of Bic Magics am Merona and Baraka lead the way and have each other's backs am Merona taking the front glaive ready to take down all challenges and Baraka watching the sides protecting a maradona's flanks the party successfully reaches the entrance of the mine without issue or being heard and spotted all right let's get in here and see if we can start picking these little guys off as the party gently makes its way into the mine Joel your passive perception picks up some cackling noise off to your left guys I think we have company up there to the left sh Joel sneak up there and check it out sh no I'm going to have to do it nobody can see into this Darkness but me Obama gave me a stealth rooll to see if you can sneak up there successfully and scouted out I got a 14 Sean braa Glides across the stone floor of the mine silently moving up near a pile of crates as he peers over them he lays eyes on a pair of goblins most likely the two who came out to scout the surroundings earlier they seem to be idly chatting about some nonsense I sneak back over to the party Sean there's two goblins in there looks like they're chatting with each other well let's go in there and clean their clock I'm getting tired of this sneaky crap these are literally goblins we were told there were only 8 to 10 of them that's literally nothing for us to handle shaa light a torch and then I walk up and throw it in the room the rest of the party watches as a Merida lights up a torch and tosses it into the room with the two goblins this has immediately gotten the attention of the two goblins everybody roll for initiative I got a modded 20 18 here damn it I got an 11 I got a 14 Sean all right both goblins were below that so the order is Joel braa Bushmaster a midona then the Goblins Joel it's your turn all right right Sean I'm going to run up slightly behind a midona and cast vicious mockery on the Goblin on the right it'll need to pass a dc14 wisdom save it fails Joe roll your attack damage that'll be two damage and it has disadvantage on its next attack role Joel's stinging words Pierce through the stagnant air of the mine and into the Goblin's ears the party can see the Twisted look on his face as he suffers the emotional damage all right Obama it's your turn okay okay Sean I'm going to run over to the right side of Joel and try to hit the left Goblin with Ray of frost that'll be a 17 to hit and six damage brocka runs over and skids to a halt besides Joel he slaps his hands together and conjures a freezing cold orb of frost he then directs it outwards in a beam towards the left Goblin striking true the goblin reels in Frost touch pain he looks as if he could collapse at any minute Bushmaster at the beginning of your turn you begin to hear cackling in the distance not to far behind you down the Other M shaft oh yeah fantastic rushing in plan a merido here comes the rest of the goblin family we're about to get surrounded Shan I run over close to the mine shaft that I heard the cackling coming from I point my arm towards the 10x 10t enclosed passageway and spray it down with grease that'll end my turn Sean all right so now it'll be the left Goblin's turn he's going to run up to a Maradona and attempt to hit him with his Scimitar he attempts to strike Merona but his speed is so sluggish from Brea's Frost that a midona easily Sid steps the blade now it'll be the right Goblin's turn he's going to attempt to hit am Merona with his short bow oh yeah that's awesome everybody is just trying to dog pile me I think it's more that you're the big armored Paladin with the massive weapon right in front of them um anyways he's going to roll with disadvantage because he's trying to hit amarona through his Goblin Ally the goblin pulls the string back on his bow he attempts to concentrate to attempt to aim around found his Goblin Ally however at the moment he is ready to release his Arrow he thinks about the slew of emotional damage that Joel inflicted upon him earlier and releases the arrow it harmlessly flies wide off to the side wait a minute you skip my turn Sean well uh you know what Trump you're right new table rule if I screw you over as the dungeon master you get a free inspiration so Trump you get a free inspiration now and it's your turn nice nice all right Sean I'm going to attack the Goblin in front of me with a normal melee attack no Smite that's going to be an 18 to hit and then that's seven damage um awesome the party watches as a midona runs the small Goblin through with his mighty glaive he then slings the goblin off the glaive to the side of the mine passage as if it was nothing more than a piece of garbage all right Sean now I'm going to move to the Archer Goblin in the back and use my bonus action pole AR master and strike him all right I rolled a 13 to hit and then seven damage all right that'll hit the less armored Archer Goblin the party watches as a midona rushes from his position towards the rear of the mining Cavern he nears the Archer Goblin and swings the Pummel of his glaive across the skull of the goblin with a sickening crack the goblin crumbles to the cave floor motionless as soon as the party thinks the combat has ended Bushmaster can see three new goblins running down the Min shaft that he sprayed down with grease they'll enter the top of the initiative order and take their turns immediately each of them will attempt to move through the grease covered area and attack Bushmaster Goblin one fails and falls in the grease prone Goblin 2 fails and falls in the grease prone and Goblin 3 barely makes it through having slipped but just barely maintained his balance he makes his way over to you Bushmaster and attempts to strike you with his timitar just so you guys know I have all your character sheets pulled up on the DM screen on my laptop in D and D Beyond so that's why I never ask for your passives armor classes or DC checks on abilities anyways the goblin manages to swing his zitar and strike true on your Bushmaster getting past your armored outer layers and hitting something critical he'll deal three slashing damage to you oh wow that's it oh uh I mean Ah that's smart s very funny Bush very funny I'll remember that for later Joe it's Joel's turn thanks Bush I can't wait till Shawn pulls out something later to take us to Clapp bees anyways Shawn I'm going to cast vicious mockery on the goblin attacking Bushmaster the goblin hears the stinging words coming from Joel but manages to shake them off knowing that he has comrades nearby even though they're currently faltering I'll save my bonus action for now Sean Baraka at the beginning of your turn you now also hear additional cackling and holling coming from the other mining shaft heading deeper into the mine out of the frying pan and into the oven boys we got more incoming from the other shaft Joel I suggest you stay helping Bushmaster am Merona can you please come Frontline for me over here I can't take melee hits hey I'm the party leader Joel you go help Bushmaster I'm going to front line for braa so he doesn't get squished over there squished by the enemy or squished by you shut the hell up Joe this fat Ambush isn't time for jokes missed opportunity Joe just like you missed that victory in the Middle East damn holy [ __ ] Joe Friendly Fire anyways Sean I'm going to move slightly up to the deeper Min shaft and take the ready action I'm going to ready a second level Rhymes binding ice spell all right Obama Bush Master it's your turn Okay Sean I'm going to use Thunder Wave on the goblins in front of me they need to make that dc14 Constitution saving throw all right so Goblin one is going to fail Goblin 2 critically fails and Goblin 3 right in front of you also fails what's the damage holy crap double eight that's going to be 16 damage Sean very nice Bushmaster and Joel look on in amazement as Bushmaster claps his hands together and the thunderous Force projects outwards from his hands as the Rippling Force rocks across the shaft it strikes each of the god goblins in turn the physical power is so strong that it flays pieces of skin off the Goblins as the edges of the Zone touches them as the primary force actually impacts their bodies their sternums and rib cages buckle inwards their skulls cave in and their internal organs rupture and burst as the wave finishes passing over them their bodies are left limp and not a sound is heard H take that scrawny little goblins maybe a Maradona was right this is lightweight Sean I use my movement to adjust to the other Min shaft to help the rest of the party okay Trump it's a maradona's turn Sean I take the ready action and prepare the sacred flame can trip for the first goblin I see very good as you guys prepare yourselves at the M shaft the cackling stops and you begin to hear chanting then a heavy stomping coming down the M shot ah [ __ ] what now well that didn't sound good Sean I prepare the the lightning lure cantrip for whatever comes through the [Music] shaft Sean I quickly run over behind the guys and prepare a vicious mockery all right Joe the entire party prepares itself weapons at the ready and spells a light in hand after a tense few more moments a dastardly sight emerges before you from the M shaft a full cave Oger followed by what looks to be about six more goblins one of them appearing to be wielding a staff instead of a melee or ranged weapon Sean I released my Rhymes binding ice all right looks like the cone will hit them all because they're all clustered up right now so they'll all have to roll the saving throw Goblin one fails Goblin 2 critically fails Goblin 3 fails Goblin four fails Goblin 5 fails and Goblin 6 fails I think I need to get new dice or something now for the cave ogre wow he'll also fail by one I'm definitely buying a new set of dice the NPCs have done nothing but fail saving throws this entire scenario encounter anyways what's the damage on that spell of arm they'll all be taking 14 cold damage Sean uh well then the party looks on in amazement as braa releases his prepared spell of Frozen death a wave of Chilly Frost washes over the goblins and their ogre Ally the cave ogre manages to weather the attack but his morale is definitely damaged as he watches every single one of his Goblin allies freeze solid then fall over and shatter into hundreds of pieces Sean I release my prepared sacred flame at the ogre well let's go ahead and roll that saving throw then of course it fails by one due to its negative 1 deex modifier what what's the damage Trump uh that's going to be six damage Sean well then let's minus that off and now we Shan I released my lightning lure that I had [Music] prepared yep yep you sure do well let's go ahead and do this it's a strength saving throw so surely the cave ogre doesn't fail this today just isn't my day that [ __ ] one what's the damage bush uh uh- it's uh it's pulled 10 ft towards me and it takes five lightning damage cool cool go ahead Joe I know it's there I'm not sure what you're talking about Sean I uh I forgot I'm just going to go ahead and roll that wisdom saving throw hell yeah a five what's the damage Joe no I don't I don't want to what is the damage Joe I'm scared the damage is for Oba help so now it's the ogre's turn Bushmaster you're right in the way it swings its Mighty great Club at [Music] you the sheer weight of the club smashes you like a grape and inflicts 15 damage on you all right I'm uh I'm sorry I got a little bit out of control there uh let's just continue on Obama it's your turn I believe I uh um okay yeah uh I cast Firebolt at the ogre oh no what's up Obama nothing I rolled a five I missed H let me see uh no no uh there's nothing to see here these aren't the dice you're looking for move Obama let me see no Sean it's a five I swear I will see that D20 fine then of course it's a natural fr freaking 20 go ahead roll the damage Obama it's going to be 11 damage Sean the party Witnesses braa pull off yet another astonishing move of magical amazement he conjures another larger than normal magical anomaly this time a lance of fire that Jets out of his hand and Strikes the ogre directly in the face the ogre reels away in pain its face left charred from the fire Joe it's your turn I'm going to use healing word on Bushmaster he will get eight health back all right then moving on to you Trump time to finish Rosie o Donal over here off I'm going to strike the ogre with my glaive and added Smite that's going to be a 14 to hit and then we'll have 12 slashing damage along with a 10 radiant damage the party watches as a midona charges the short distance to the cave ogre he leaps through the air and pierces his glaive into the skull of the ogre as soon as the glaive is embedded into the skull of of the ogre the party see the ogre's eyes glow bright with Celestial light and then burn out the ogre's body collapses to the ground a midona steps off the body glaive in hand light work good job handling all the little guys braa it was pretty funny watching them all topple over and shatter into pieces I've got to admit it was pretty funny now that I look at it in hindsight it was also pretty funny watching the look on that thing's face when Bushmaster grabbed it with that lightning lasso and pulled it closer it was already [ __ ] its pants after it lost all its Little Friends next thing it knew it was getting lit up and dragged closer to deathland I didn't think I'd already have more Source material for a new song not sure what the name will be yet maybe I'll have thought of something by the time we're done securing the mine well let's head down this passage they came from and make sure there's no stragglers back here so the Party begins heading down the Min shaft that the ogre came out of of as you guys travel you notice all sorts of trash and clutter left around by the Goblins it seems that you might have fully cleared them out however as you near the back of the shaft it opens up into a cavern you hear some faint voices around a corner in the back of the cavern and see some torch light back there looks like we got some stragglers in the back maybe this is where the short stacks are hiding a midona wouldn't that be unhealthy they're living in a gross unbathed part of the flavor I know you did not just say flavor uh let's go Bop these last stragglers over the head the party approaches the back Nook of the cavern filled with the bravado of the constant victories of the past few fights when you cross the corner however you see the hulking back of a large green orc and then The Telltale red skin and jet black hair of two hobgoblin guards you also see a small sniveling Goblin in the corner waiting with a cup in his hands and his eyes cast at the floor without turning away from what he is looking at on the table he begins to speak to you so I guess the ogre didn't get the job done then who would have thought that gold Crest had some adventurers worth their salt in the village right now it's no matter I guess this is just something I'll have to take care of myself well I didn't really expect to turn the corner and find this who are you guys my name is Oram but anything beyond that is none of your concern you've set meticulously crafted plans back and caused problems that I can't afford so I'm afraid your road ends here Sean I want to cast detect thoughts on this orc uh Oram something weird is going on here interesting choice Joe well played as you peer around the surface thoughts of Oram you can see anger and anxiety you can feel that he carries a sense of dread at the possibility of failing his current set of orders do you wish to probe deeper this will trigger the saving throw yes this information seems tied to something bigger all right then Joel attempts to probe deeper into oram's mind for more information however as he does he sees Orum glan at him with a keen gaze Joel can't seem to gleam any more information it seems I might have already gifted off too much info with how relaxed I was being you morons have any last words and here I thought the ogre was the final fight in here [ __ ] I came for short stacks and all I got was a big Burly orc and his two hobgoblin lovers time to hand out the Clapp sauce Boys Roll for initiative everyone 17 here I got a 13 hell yeah 19 for the Donald damn I got a five uh all right so the initiative is am meridon Bushmaster Oram Joel hobgoblin one Bara and then Hub Goblin to uh all right Sean I'm coming in with a can of whoop ass wide open I'm going to bonus action vow of enmity on Oram for attack Advantage then I'm going to attack him with my glaive and smite ah [ __ ] that's an 11 and a 12 I'm going to assume that doesn't hit this big boy you would be correct Trump am Merona closes in on Oram and attempts to deliver a mighty swing but Oram throws up his battle axe and blocks it he stares you in the eye with a grin as you two lock weapons Trump uh not light work boys [ __ ] it's Bush Master's turn all right Sean I'm going to cast my trusty catapult spell with that iron pot behind Oram and then fling it at him he needs to make a dc-14 deck save he fails to save Bush what's the damage looks like that'll be 17 bludgeoning damage Sean the party sees Bushmaster snatch up the iron pot off the table with his catapult spell he reels it back behind him and then flings it at Oram with great force it strikes him in the rib cage and the party could swear that they heard a slight crack however Oram doesn't Flinch and continues to lock weapons with a midona I'm also going to bonus action Guardian armor for four temp HP Shan nice nice the party also sees Bush Master activate his armor for the first time additional magical defensive runes spring to life on the armor and the party hears a slight humming as the runes glow now it's going to be oram's turn he breaks his melee lock with a midona and begins his own series of offensive moves against him he swings his battle axe with enraged Fury and catches a midona off guard connecting cleanly with the side of your torso and dealing 15 damage he then swings again at you but having gathered his senses a midona just manages to block with his glaive o guys this isn't a joke don't play around this fight I got more than the wind knocked out of me just now it's now Joel's turn uh okay think think no panicking I'm going to save my actual spells for healing an attempt to help a Maradona take the brunt of this guy's attacks I cast vicious mockery on him he hears your stinging words Joel and for a second you think it's worked he then looks at you and shakes his head you'll be next for screwing with my head so much you flimsy music man oh [ __ ] I've only pissed it off all right it's hobgoblin one's turn he points at Bushmaster and smiles then rushes him he swings his long sword at him but Bushmaster just manages to get his mace raised to block the oncoming blow it now be br's turn all right Sean I'm going to second level witch Bolt the other hobgoblin before he can attack me or Joel oh thank God it's a natural 20 let's see that's going to be 23 lightning damage Sean I'm beginning to think you have some loaded dice over there Obama the party sees braa strike out with a powerful blast of lightning it connects with the Hobgoblin and shocks its body through and through until it's nothing but a burning and smoking corpse am Merona now that it's your turn you see Oram witness the loss of one of his guards as you two are locked weapons you see him release a mighty battlecry into the a I would say good job braa but I think you might have just gotten me killed Sean I'm going to attempt to strike Oram again with Smite added and then I'm going to bonus action strike him with polearm [Music] Master my high role is a 16 Shan does that hit yep roll damage Trump okay that'll be 11 slashing damage plus 12 radiant damage now I'm going to try and hit him with pole arm Master that'll be a modded 20 sha with seven bludgeoning damage the party sees a mer donor redouble his efforts to assault orgam now truly understanding the threat that he poses he conducts a series of offensive Maneuvers first pivoting and confusing Oram striking him in the hip with his glaive and smite then twisting backwards while twirling the glaive in his backand to bring the pommel up striking orgam across the jaw Bush it's your go Shan I quickly drop my mace and activate my thunder gauntlets then strike the Hobgoblin attacking me that'll be a 21 to hit and 11 damage well done the party sees Bushmaster toss his mace aside and smash his fists together they pulse and crackle with thunderous energy he then strikes out and connects with the Hobgoblin who slightly doubles over from being punched in the gut with such Force we're back on oram's turn he's visibly filled with hatred at the onslaught that am meridon just dropped on him so he begins to attempt to return the favor oh [ __ ] he swings his battle axe with rage but a midona ducks and Dodges then attempts a second swing with even more hatred but am Merona manages to roll out of the way he begins a third attack with a gutural War crime finally manages to make contact with the midona rending him across the back dealing 19 damage a midona barely remains standing coughing up some blood Joel heels please I can't take another hit like that Joel is up oh yeah this is what I'm here for I cast second level healing word on a Maradona as an action healing him for 10 HP then I cast Bic inspiration on a Maradona now Hob Goblin one will continue his assault on Bushmaster he swings his long sword down on Bushmaster and connects on his shoulder joint dealing 15 damage due to his martial Advantage Bush Master's entire body begins to spark at different places the magic structure having taken a costly toll guys I I I I don't have much more left to TT in the eminent popow power failure braa it's now your turn and you feel the full weight of the situation on you Bushmaster and am Merona are almost down Joel can't keep up with the healing hold on guys we ain't going down in this filthy cave Shan I use metamagic to Twin spell a second level witch bolt at Oram and the Hobgoblin let's see I rolled a 15 Shan braa conjures another witch bolt and twins it at both of the enemies but having seen the threat that the spell poses they both were preparing for it to be used again arum and the Hobgoblin Dodge the bolt damn it am Merona you have to do something they dodg my spellwork [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] Sean as an action I restore 20 hit points with lay on hands then I attack orgam with polar arm Master as a bonus action that'll be a 16 to hit and six damage the party sees a Merona placs his hand to his own chest and a pulsing Celestial glow thrums from his palm he then stands quickly and swings his glaive pommel into organ's jaw catching him off guard Bushmaster it's your turn turn Sean I'm going to magic Missile The Hub Goblin I've got to get him out of this fight that's going to be eight damage Bush Master sends out three magic missiles from a mount on his wrist they all strike the Hobgoblin he reels back in pain and his left barely standing on his feet he looks to be in a terrible way coughing up blood well damn it's now or's turn he's going to continue to conduct combat with a midona he quickly makes two vicious Swings with his battle axe at Merona however with his renewed Vigor from his lay on hands aerona Dodges and then blocks the hits the two lock weapons and meet each other's eyes both knowing that only one person is coming out of this fight alive Joel is up Sean I cast a second level healing word on bushmasters my bonus action healing him for 7 HP then I'll use my crossbow on the Hobgoblin that'll be a 22 to hit and nine damage Bush Master field feels a wave of healing wash over him as he's knelt on the ground and watching the Hobgoblin hobble over to him sword raised and ready to strike you think about how the healing was probably useless as this disgusting creature is about to finish you off just as he's about to strike you see a crossbow bolt Pierce through the front of his skull the Hobgoblin audibly stammers stumbles a bit then collapses to the ground you see Joel standing a little ways behind him crossbow empty and aimed in your direction ah great I'm never going to get to live this one down damn it thanks Joel no problem Bushmaster everybody rallied to a midona braa it's back to you going for another witch bolt on orgam my last second level spell slot damn it that's an 11 I know that misses it's over to am Maradona now come on you big bastard just go down uh I attack with my glaive and then bonus action with my polar AR Master that's a 15 to hit nope I'm going to use that inspiration to roll there we go that'll be a 21 to hit with eight damage poar Master will have also 21 to hit with a seven damage nice a midona leans down and cuts up with his glaive getting a good slice out of Orum he then shoves him slightly away with a grunt and twists his glaive around clocking him across the forehead with the Pummel of the glaive Orum seeing the fight not going his way calls out to his little Goblin servant pipsqueak go detonate the cavern go now the party sees the small Goblin with the cup from earlier attempt to run out of the cavern Nook Bushmaster you get an attempt to stop him or you can use your turn as normal I'm going to try and stop him Sean I use my lightning lure cantrip on him he has to pass a a dc14 strength saving throw he fails the party and Oram sees Bushmaster fire his lightning rure out from his wrists it snatches the goblin up and electrocutes him until he falls to the ground damn it why won't you weaklings just die you're ruining all the Master's plans Orum swings at am Merona once more in his rage and panic he misses both times swinging wildly and without Focus Joel it's your turn Sean I'm going to attempt to cast sleep on him now this is taking a turn I didn't expect roll the hit point dice Joe all right that'll be a 30 shot well hot damn I can't believe it the party watches Joel play a gentle tune on his loot Orum stumbles a bit and his eyes grow heavy he then collapses on the ground with a mighty thud it only lasts for a minute guys what are we doing I say we kill him and be done with it he already had us on the ropes he was weathering most of the attacks we could throw at him with ease a single hit from him was decimating me he has a lot of that we need a lot of the stuff he said leaves questions that needs answering everybody knows I hate to agree with the Maradona but I think we should just be done with him he's too dangerous to be left alive it's not the hero way uh shut up you too with your weird pop culture references I'm killing him and that's final start searching the room for any clues and info he's got papers and stuff on the table Sean I move to stand over his body and drive my glaive into and through the back of his neck I'm not going to ask for any numbers or anything he is asleep injured and completely vulnerable you drive your glaive into the back of his neck and through it with an audible gurgle Orum lays on the ground dead well that's that then Shan and I search the body when searching the body amarona finds a crumpled up missive in one of oram's leather pouches he opens it and begins reading Oram had been ordered to build a strike force outside of Goldcrest he was to attack the town four to 5 days from now now after receiving around 25 goblins as reinforcements his objective was to draw forces away from Citadel to assist in the main Army's attack on Citadel the following day the missive isn't signed it's only stamped by a single symbol an upright black hand with the thumb folded inward the symbol is too intricate to be that of an all green skin Force Sean I relay this info to the rest of the party holy crap that's some serious stuff we need to get back to Goldcrest and tell Captain Ironstone guys there's more there's two crates of chains and shackles back here there's a note with the same sigil it says for the attained slaves yep gather all the evidence we can we'll detonate the entrance to the mine on our way out so those goblins can't use it as a base if they show up I'm sure the mining Guild will understand they shouldn't have a problem clearing their way back in especially if it's empty and safe the party gathers up the evidence and makes their way to the entrance of the mine Bushmaster set the alchemical explosive wherever you think best to collapse the entrance at the top will be best on the support beam all right we're all set I suggest we get some distance I'm starting the timer now the party Sprints back to the tree line and turns to watch the detonation the explosive goes off and does its job collapsing the entrance however jents we're going to stop right there and resume next session this one has been a long one you guys can level up to five after that boss fight I'll see you next [Music] time

Channel: GIMME YOUR BELT STUDIOS

Views: 11,957

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Id: 1brFXKO9U4A

Length: 120min 42sec (7242 seconds)

Published: Sun Feb 25 2024