The Psychology of Arcane: Vi and Caitlyn — Therapist Reacts!

who the hell are you here she is she has been here for years and that gruff avoidant personality of i don't need anyone and it's not for her i'm happy to finally see someone that's coming here it's immediately that back off who are you this is her avoidant personality she's learnt to depend only on herself perfectly at play silke the industrialist okay this is getting old can you just send in whoever's going to kick the out of me so i can get on with my night she expects to get beaten up it's not even a trauma it's just what happens this is her life and she's accepted it which is a huge telling of who her personality is this is someone that expects the world to come at her she doesn't trust it it isn't safe so avoidant personalities they're ones that the world did not turn out well but they ended up learning that they could handle themselves that even if they're in distress no one else is going to come in and rescue them so they learnt to depend on all the tools that they had at their own resources that they will be their own rescuer does this mean anything to you she sees the red line that says do not walk over it and she walks over it anyways she's willing to take this risk is it that she can read by not v vi that she can read her that well or is it that she's more naive than in her world caitlyn has learned that the world actually does take care of you and so she's willing to take these risks to trust people even if other people say she shouldn't where did you get this and when vi sees the picture that powder jinx drew she immediately rushes down to the jail cell but caitlyn doesn't back off my question first he worked for silke uh they all do how can anyone not know that where did you find this caitlyn instead of being scared and just doing what vi had asked she takes a step in that moment shows her own strength and says i'm going to ask for something first from you now they're negotiating they have this rapport in between each other that could be a good way to get a lay of the land too risky we have vi she's gotten her moment of freedom and she's not gonna do things the way that caitlyn does them which is by the book she's doing them her way this shows this wonderful opposite characters of who they are as people caitlyn believes that vi might actually have a way of getting information that she hasn't been able to do yet and she wants to be able to come back with something to show for herself to show her parents and to show the world that she is more than a rich person that's been placed in this position because her parents gave it to her i love the difference between this here we have vai in her element doing things that she shouldn't do it shows caitlyn scared timid even though she's scared though she keeps on following vi anyways this is a new world for her that she's being submerged in and then you see vi this is her world she's parkouring and running and she's finally been let out and you see these two very different people and the way that they go about things one fearless reckless and one timid but still courageous enough to be able to follow a new path that moment of vi finally being free being able to kind of fly through the air like a bird after being caged for that many years you can feel it through the movement and her actions how amazing this moment really is for her and you see kalyn that pause of what am i doing is this even the right thing that she's not used to breaking the rules but that she wants to she also wants to be free free of the expectations of her parents free of the rules that are imposed upon her for both of them here we have these two opposite worlds this very romeo juliet moment of these worlds colliding to completely different people yet in so many ways so similar and i think in a lot of ways that's why opposites attract are you going to question him about what and me silco his connections isn't that why we're here we're here because i'm hungry do you know what prison food is like no of course you don't i think that it is sometimes really hard for us to understand what someone else's journey is and for caitlyn she's lived a life of luxury and i don't think that she understands where vi is really coming from i think that's part of the intrigue upon both of them is that they live this completely separate way but when we don't understand someone else's culture or where they have been we can often misinterpret their actions and what they mean because of that well that place does look like it has bodies buried in the basement you don't know anything it's funny when we don't know what someone else has been through or what their intention is their look on this place is completely from opposite spectrums vi takes a look at in this was her old home where she and powder lived where she hung out with van der carries all kinds of painful but also beautiful memories and caitlyn coming from this upper class high society looks at it as this is a horrific place and judges it and it causes via a lot of hurt to have her home be looked at as this horrific place where bodies must have been buried i think that we do that a lot when we can't fully properly empathize with what someone else went through sometimes we say something without really thinking what someone else's intentions are because we impart our own belief system on top of theirs and sometimes that can cause some really deep hurt and pain [Music] here we have caitlyn does not feel comfortable at all in the surrounding whereas vi goes into this brothel like she owns the place and so that culture shock of having to learn a whole bunch of sets of rules very quickly can cause us a lot of social anxiety where we're not sure what we have to do and we can feel a lot of anxiety because we don't want to do the wrong thing and i think that this adds a little bit of that attraction here is vi she's able to show caitlin a part of the world where it's scary for her but for vi she's comfortable and in control and able to keep her safe this forces her into a trusting situation with vi and a lot of times that sense of danger and calamity can actually make people feel a stronger attraction to each other going to see a horror film or going rock climbing or staying on a very high bridge it actually increases our feeling of love and want for another person little tiny tip there let him think you work here excuse me i will not you expect everyone to give you what you want if you really want people to talk to you you have to let them think you have what they want and i love that because that is the truth so kaelyn is used to using her power or status to be able to get what she wants and people will just listen to her because of that but that isn't what happens in the lanes you can't just use power you have to be able to manipulate cozy up to a situation or make someone want to be able to tell you and so this has caitlyn not feeling very comfortable because she has to use a new set of tools that she is not used to and whenever we do something that's new for us our levels of anxiety often come up and what do i have you're hot cupcake so what'll it be man or woman um okay and now we see we see that beginning spark between both of them one is the way that by kind of predatorily walked around caitlyn which makes her feel a little bit uneasy but you can tell that she didn't mind it and then that power move when vi corners her by putting her arm up and getting really close to her you can see caitlyn's breathing starts to change and she doesn't really know what to say she's testing the waters this is the beginning of both of them flirting and flirting is our way to be able to see how someone else feels about us without having to go straight out and risk ourselves by actually saying it and for vi being more avoidant she's gonna wait until she's really pretty sure before she's gonna make any direct moves to caitlyn because that risk of getting hurt being abandoned or being rejected is so painful and so that's where flirting comes in it's two people being able to see what really is up and how they feel about each other you're hot cupcake so right away when you tell someone that you're attractive and the way that vice said it was not those really sugary oh you're so pretty compliments this was more like a statement then she went into her space she cornered her that's often can be seen as a very threatening gesture unless you like the person and you can tell right away that caitlyn was taken aback but that her breathing started to change and she didn't try to escape her eyes were not darting away which we do when we want to find an escape route they were staring straight at her so we see that beginning of that spark forming between caitlyn and vi [Music] and so i love the shock on vae's face one is like wait a second is that caitlyn suddenly really comfortable in this position that she didn't think that she would ever be that comfortable in and i love that little huff of wow she definitely is much more comfortable in this situation than i expected it to i was completely right about her why did you let her go do you ever say thank you he's gonna know we're here now whose fault is that no vi isn't used to thanking people she's not even used to having anyone save her even after she was with vander vai was used to being the one that was the leader of the troop she was the one that led things she took care of everyone else so she's not used to having to depend on anyone else she's not even used to having anyone ever have to rescue her she usually fights her way out of it so this is completely new territory for vi also you're an all right shot i'm an excellent shot you're gonna help me out cupcake stop calling me that by giving caitlyn a compliment is a huge deal because it's not something that vi does often when you don't usually give people compliments they carry much more weight are you gonna help me out cupcake stop calling me that my name is caitlin but you're so sweet like a cupcake shut up even her asking caitlyn to help her up her trusting her depending upon her for someone that's avoidant that is a huge deal when anyone that has an avoidant personality type asks from someone else for help that means that they're showing them that they trust them when they both have this joking around about calling her cupcake that is really cute flirting going on it's that joking teasing that we do to people that we like that we feel comfortable with and for vi she's definitely testing the waters that caitlyn tells her to shut up in that cute way while she's helping support her and they're this close shows that chemistry that they both have with each other you really only tease people that you feel very comfortable with and for a lot of people only the people that they feel comfortable with so they're being nice to you they may not like you that much and if they're teasing you that might be the first sign that they really like you i know you have your reservations about me this only works if we can trust each other it doesn't work so here we have those different attachment types so caitlyn that's securely attached who has lived in a world that she believes is always safe talks about being able to trust each other and even when she goes to touch vae's face she doesn't allow her to for vi this is not a world that is safe everything that she has been taught has said that you know what if you depend on someone they're going to let you down you topsiders always find a way to screw us i suppose topside is to blame for all your misfortunes and it's really interesting so often we as humans make our own little groups which is an us and then everyone outside of that is of them them is bad and scary and does the wrong thing and us are right and righteous and we are the ones that we need to protect we're basically tribalists we have these hundred thousand year old brains in this modern society and that's what's happening between caitlyn and vi they've each made each other into other which has allowed them to be able to hurt each other to demonize them to kill without having to feel remorse we aren't monsters you know we're people just like you you don't know anything about me and so caitlyn's words of we are not monsters we're humans just like you helps bring us to that point of you know what us as humans no matter what walk of life that we have what culture what socioeconomic status we are more similar than different there is good and bad among all of us i shouldn't have left you it's all right and when vi says i shouldn't have left you what she's really saying is not just to caitlin but she also left powder and so she's going through the guilt of leaving an abandoning powder because she sometimes gets overloaded and needed to break and she's not used to depending and leaning on people it's easier for her to not have anyone to get too close to her because then she might hurt them or she might lose them and so i think that for vi it's also a little bit of a defensive strategy you have a good heart you've got a good heart vi's reaction to getting this compliment one is the compliment is one that's kind of i see through all of your blocks we create all these masks that we wear in front of ourselves so that people don't see inside of who we really are because we want to keep that part safe caitlyn is saying i see through all of this harsh tough exterior to the soft warm part that is inside of you and she likes it easy easy oh and you see when vison distress how close caitlyn gets to her and she places her hands on her face which is very intimate you can see how distressed caitlyn is to be able to see vi going through all of this pain we don't get our face that close to someone that we don't really like even if they're distressed even if they're pain this shows their level of closeness that they're able to actually achieve they've created this bond by going through all of these traumatic experiences you'd be like this is way too soon to create this connection but when you go through traumatic experiences together you form connections much faster much deeper why because you had to depend on each other and so we end up testing each other out and finding out who the other person is at a much deeper level and limbicly it forms that emotional connection because distress and safety they've each rescued fought for each other and protected each other and so that created this bond of they are a safe person for me they'll be there to protect me we need you back in your feet what was the name savika gave you jinx and look at caitlyn how quickly that moment took her but then she had to move away it was too intense a moment for her and then she immediately changed the subject also as a deflection so that vi wouldn't catch that they carried this moment that she showed her true feelings for vi in that fraction of a second you can't change her i have to try don't get yourself killed you see that sadness in caitlyn's eyes when vi says that she has to leave that little tiny pout that look those little micro expressions that give way that this is not something that she's happy about you see actual raw emotions of them having to be separated it's been real cupcake thanks for everything and do you see the difference between the hugs via has known echo since childhood they're really really close but the hug is kind of you know warm but it's not tight and even when vi was hugging echo she was looking up towards caitlyn i'm sorry that i have to do this and then when they hug together it's this warm tight embrace they're holding on to each other and by her hand rubs softly on the back of her neck that's another sign of affection romantic affection between both of them and then that small nuzzle in that caitlyn does that is to people that we really care about animals do that in order to scent things meaning this is mine i wanted that even in this short amount of time they've formed this deep connection to one another and it's going to be very painful to have to part we played a game where we pretended to be bigger and bigger monsters so she would say i'm a slug monster with venom for ooze and i would say well i'm a slug eating crap with razor spikes the cool part about this scene is when you start to hang around with someone you like them we start to mirror their emotions and their movements and you see them both with their arms in the same position curled up on the bed sharing these wonderful moments mimicking each other but it also is kind of like a yang and a yang they're opposites and i think that that shows the differences of their worlds this romeo juliet enforcer and person from the lanes the rich the poor the powerful the powerless and how they work so beautifully together even though they come from completely different worlds and i think that that is something that they're so different yet carries so many of the same values and that attraction to one another i love this moment between caitlyn and her mom her mom sees how deeply she's hurt that vi left i think that her mom gets that this is more than just good friends and she gives her that little tiny nod like yeah go get her wait where are you going i don't know back where i came from so you see that avoidant when they're in distress and things don't go their way they leave they escape they run seems like that's what everyone up here wants i can fix this you can't kaitlyn is not anxiously attached though she's securely attached she came from good parents that loved her and protected her so she goes to get vibe but not in a way that is distressful very different from the way that powder reacted when vi left her she's talking to her she's asking what's happening she wants to be able to reach out and make this better top sides and bottom oil and water that's all there is what about us oil and water what does it mean to pay and when caitlyn asks what about us she means their relationship for vi she's used to being alone this is not comfortable for her she figures especially after seeing caitlyn in this big beautiful world of being lavish and rich that she wouldn't really be able to understand her or accept her or make this work and what avoidant people often do when they feel threatened or that they might lose someone is that they will cut ties first caitlyn is there wanting to try to make it work because she sees wonderful things in vi probably things that vi doesn't really recognize in herself vi is used to things ending poorly that it's always going to end badly so why even attempt this when it's going to become so painful so she might as well cut ties early and be the one to be in control to be able to do it and she leaves caitlyn in the rain caitlyn doesn't chase her she respects that vi has asked this even though she doesn't agree and that shows that secure attachment [Music] so caitlyn goes back through the moments of vi leaving her because it's so heartfelt to her she's in so much pain about it we're very associative to smell and location it was beneficial for us if we get bitten by a rattlesnake it's smart to remember that mossy area the next time we go into a mossy area and so being in the shower for her reminds her of being in the rain plus it's that quiet time when there are no distractions and you can be alone with your thoughts and she tries to turn back time you see the raindrops going backwards as she wishes that she had done something different that she had played this out in a different way which happens inside of our heads when we've gone through something that's painful we relive it and hopes that we can make something different happen and that's what caitlin wants she wants to replay this with a different ending one where she doesn't lose vi in the process because she's realizing how much vi really means to her no powder listen we can just go we'll leave and never come back we'll put this behind us you'll never have to see him again i'm not lying i'm on your side i promise it's beautiful to see vi she's so worried that jinx is going to shoot her girlfriend the person that she cares so much about and she wants to protect them both so deeply that she's willing to lose one in order to keep her safe she offers to her sister what your sister really wants you and i can leave this place even though she knows that she may never see caitlyn again because of that this wonderful relationship of two people that are completely different showing how opposites attract and this shows what a fabulous relationship caitlyn and vi really have with each other just like our sponsor fabulous fabulous is a behavioral changing out if you want to change something that you're doing you have a bad habit or you want to become more motivated or deal with stress fabulous can help you do it the cool part about fabulous is that it uses actual cognitive behavioral techniques scientific methods in order to help you not only does fabulous support 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Channel: Georgia Dow

Views: 406,157

Keywords: psychology, psychotherapy, therapy, self help, life coach, psychotherapist, self improvement, arcane, league of legends, vi, Caitlyn

Id: ZfT46OiYzic

Length: 26min 39sec (1599 seconds)

Published: Tue Dec 28 2021