- We're back with more Reddit stories, and today I'm joined by my
friends, Damien and Ian. - What's up, gamers? - Great to be back, Shayne. - Ian, we've actually been waiting for you to come back on the show because our first story here is an update that people have been wanting
us to read for a while now, but we've been waiting for you. Do you remember the story? There was a woman, a
young woman who joined, she started a new job and there
was a camera in her office. - Oh my god! Oh my god. - [Damien] I watched this episode. I don't remember this. - Not the cameras. - She had a camera in her office, and she kind of questioned it, but she's like, "Maybe they're inactive." But anytime she would
like be done with her work and had nothing to do, she would suddenly, her boss would be like, "Oh, here's some work for you to do." And she'd be like, "I think they're actively
watching me in my office." - And she was like, "It's
not like a big deal. "Like, I don't really wanna
like raise a concern." Probably outta fear of losing her job. - What have they done to us as a society that we're just like, "It's okay." - [Shayne] Yeah. - I think when you're in your early 20s and you finally land your
first corporate gig, you know, you don't wanna bungle
it by upsetting the boss. - And all the comments were
like, "Dude, this is crazy. "You can't stand for this. "Like, talk to them about this. "Figure this out."
- So scary. - So we talked about it here on the show, and now there's an update. - Yes! - [Shayne] So here we go. - Yes, yes! - "Update, I don't think my boss knows "that I know there's a
camera in my office." Okay. "There's no HR, but the camera
was removed thanks to IT. "So as previously stated, "I still never said
anything about the camera. "I wasn't really comfortable with it, "but I got used to being
conscious of my actions, "so they weren't seeing
anything I didn't want them to. "There also isn't some sort
of HR to talk to about this "or anything like that. "But our IT guy came in, and
he asked my boss about it. "I wasn't in the room, "so I didn't hear the entire conversation, "but the first thing I
heard was my boss saying "that the camera was there
before my office ever was. "Something about using it to
see the front door originally. "I guess. "That was a weird excuse to me though, "because I've been there
for at least two months "at this point, "and there's no way they could
have accidentally watched me "as much as it felt like they had been. "Hearing the conversation
out loud also confirmed "beyond a shadow of a
doubt that it was a camera "and that I wasn't paranoid. "The IT guy must have felt
some type of way about it "because I didn't hear what he said, "but I heard my boss say something about, "'Well, it's not like
I was just watching her "'in her office,' in a sort of quieter, "sheepishly defensive way. "Nobody said anything to me
while they were removing it. "They took it from his side, not mine. "But they instead put it "where it'd be facing the front door. "This happened just over a week ago. "I haven't posted an update until now "because I was waiting to see "if the camera would be put back. "I really wanted to see "if they were gonna put it
back a few days after IT left "because that would've been wild. "But it's been over a week now, "the camera is still away from me. "It'll take some time "before I stop feeling
like I'm being watched "all the time though. "I'm really curious what
the guy said to my boss, "whether he said something
about it not being allowed "or if he called it flat out creepy, haha. "But I'm glad he did say something "as it got resolved without me
ever having to say anything. "I'd like to think he low key had my back. "I've still just been acting
as if I've never known "and haven't said anything about it. "And work carries on. "Also, it's so wild "that this story got put in a Smosh video. "Holy shit." (crew laughs) "I heard the news back to back, "first the hey Smosh just
bought their channel back "at the same time "as hey, your post is
in a new Smosh video." (Ian laughs) "I made this post mostly to vent "because I couldn't
tell if I had the right "to feel so weird about this situation "because everyone in my
personal circle says it isn't "that weird, so it's so nice "that so many strangers
are validating how I feel. "To hear people talk about my experience "on a public platform was a
little surreal, I won't lie. "This got so much more traction
than I was ever expecting. "But it makes me feel better,
so thank you, genuinely. "My experience feels
validated and it feels heard, "and I feel better because of it. "I'm still going to stay at this job "because I still like everyone
here and I enjoy my field. "But now I'll be doing it "under a little less surveillance, LOL. "The camera comes back,
I'll let you know." - [Ian] Wow. - Yeah, so... - My boss apologized by putting
a teddy bear in its place. Thankfully it's always there. (everyone laughs) - Yeah. - Sorry about that whole camera thing, but I hear you're a big fan of cameras, so we got you one right here. - Recording. What was that? It said, "I love you." - There's one comment here. "I saw this post from
the Smosh Pit channel. "I did like the many
comments on the last post, "including staring into the camera. "I hope they'll do an update video, "and we'll all be famous here. "Been watching them since 6/6 2013 "and still watching them today. "As for the OP, I'm glad
the camera's gone for now. "You'll let us know if it returns. "Your boss saying, 'Well,
it's not like I was "'just watching her in her office,' "kind of sounds like they're lying "and could have been
watching you the whole time." - Yeah. - "Try bringing it up
next time you're called "into their office. "I want to hear the deets now." OP responded, "I was absolutely
flabbergasted seeing it "on the Smosh channel. "They were the OG famous YouTubers. "It was cool to see them
responding to my story "and talking about me. "I do still check the office for cameras "because I still get
paranoid, but so far so good. "If I ever bring it up to them, "I'm definitely making an update." Yeah, if there's ever a camera, if you suspect there's a camera, watch some Smosh videos in your office and see if your boss brings it up. - Yeah, can you put your boss
on the camera real quick? We just wanna talk to him. - You know what's funny
is they're like stoked that we read this post on this video. I'm also a little starstruck
that we got mentioned in a Reddit.
- Yeah. I feel so special. I feel seen. - Yeah, it actually feels trippy, 'cause I've been a lurker on Reddit for like years and years. So to see like, just to be mentioned on
like a random subreddit, not the Smosh subreddit. Like, that makes sense. But it's weird. - That's funny. - It's absolutely wild. It's sort of like we've
reached documentary territory where like the aspect of
by observing something, you are now changing it. There's no such thing as
like pure observation. You know, like being observed
in your office via a camera and how you can't work normal anymore. I don't know what y'all
said on the first episode, but I do just wanna say
to anybody out there who feels like something's
a little bit off with your work situation,
even if it's your first job, you're just like, "I don't know if this is
how it's supposed to be," you gotta trust your gut
and stick up for yourself. And I know it's hard. I know it's hard. But we are controlled
through the fear of like, "Well, I guess we'll take
your employment away." Like, you are in the right, and there's no other way
that that would be excusable, even if it was just like
leftover from another office. Can you imagine like, "Oh my god, why is there this
like pit of like meat slurry?" It's like, "Oh, sorry, this
used to be a butcher shop, "and we changed it. "We forgot to remove that
pit of meat in the corner." Like, that doesn't apply. - Yeah, 'cause at the very least, she didn't even feel like
she could ask the question. - That sucks too. - You should be able to go and be like, "Hey, is that a camera in my office? "Am I being watched?" - And I'm sorry you felt that way. Like, it's not your fault. You didn't do anything wrong. This is all... - But we gotta say, good guy IT. - Yeah, all right. - Good guy IT. - I'm glad she has a Tim. - I'll say this, neutral guy IT. Because unless you're actively
working to fix the problem, like reporting the dude, you're just sort of
letting things carry on. - I guess we don't know. - [Damien] Guess not. - It's still been a couple days, but yeah. - It's just like, what a
weird thing for the boss to be like, "It's not like I
was watching her or anything." - Yeah, that's the suspicious thing. - Why'd he even have to like
defend like why the camera, I don't know. It's just so weird.
- There's like eight CRTVs on the walls. He is just like, "Yeah, it's good. "Nothing, nothing, nothing!" - It's odd, it's weird. - [Shayne] It sounds- - The camera was there
before it was an office? - 'Cause they moved the front door on account it wasn't an office before, 'cause they moved the front door, and that's why it was there. I wasn't watching her. - To all this point. She said, "I couldn't
tell if I had the right "to feel so weird about this situation "because everyone in my
personal circle says it isn't "that weird." - That's insane. - Guys, that's weird. - That's insane. - if you have your own
personal office somewhere, they're not allowed to record you in it, or at the very least without, look, at least without them telling you. Like, them to try to keep it a secret makes it all super weird. No, and it's very clear
from the get go of this one and what the boss is
saying, that it was weird. It was not professional
in any sort of means. I can't believe, yeah, that is sad that her personal circle's
like, "Yeah, that's not weird." - Yeah, on that, to that
end, original poster, I'm so glad that you're
enjoying Smosh videos. Thank you so much. You get a snack, we wanna talk
to your friends real quick. (everyone laughs) Good? If anything happens to her, it's on you. (everyone laughs) - Yeah, look, I mean, I
do know a lot of people, and I can tend to be the type of person that like lets things
slide, that I'm just like, if it's happening to me, I'll
be like, "Oh yeah, whatever." But no, it's weird. That's a weird thing, and
you have to stand up for it because, and I know it's scary, but like even if it's okay for you, then it might happen for someone else, and it's just you normalize that behavior, and you need to call it out. It is scary though. - Yeah, I'm trying to
think of like a situation where like employees would think it's okay and like normal to be filmed. And I guess it's like, I'm guessing like, 'cause this person's young,
their friends are young, they might work in service industries where there's security cameras. - [Shayne] Right. - And like yeah, if you're
working as like a cashier or whatever, like there's
oftentimes security cameras. So that's probably the context
in which they're thinking. But in an office environment, there's no reason to be filming
a person in their cubicle. That's freaky. - I could see if I was in my early 20s, new to the workforce, like in a new job, I wouldn't question things. Like, you wouldn't. I could see myself being that way. But if something makes you uncomfortable, you need to feel you have the right to at least ask about it. - I do think we'd be remiss though if we didn't bring this up. Like, we are three cis men. The original poster is a woman, right? - [Shayne] Yes. - There is an aspect there of
like power dynamic difference. And like, you know, we
might not think like, "Oh, we're being watched. "It's creepy." But like, if you're a young
woman in the workplace- - Absolutely. - There is a real possibility that a boss could be creeping on you. - [Shayne] Oh, totally. - Like, not that it doesn't happen to men, but like it's just more of like a society has shown you this can already
happen a bunch kind of thing. - Right. I was just saying for anyone who's young- - Oh, for sure. - And in the work space, you just go, "Oh, this must be how this workspace is." - Yeah. - That was more of a general comment. Not to like, "Shayne."
- Of course, of course. All right. - Nice, you did it. - Next one. "Am I the asshole for
trying to help my girlfriend "without hurting her feelings?" Okay.
- Good start. - [Shayne] Okay. - Nothing wrong here. - "I, a 32-year-old man,
have been in a relationship "with my girlfriend, a 24-year-old woman, "for almost three years now. "When we first got together,
she was pretty overweight "and struggling with her
self-esteem, depression, "and anxiety. "Over time, she started
to work on herself, "both physically and mentally. "I've been incredibly
proud of her progress "and how far she's come. "Lately though, "I noticed that she's been
putting on some weight again, "and it's been affecting
her mental health. "She's mentioned feeling
down about her body image, "and her struggles with anxiety "and depression have resurfaced. "I genuinely care for her, "and I don't wanna see
her suffer like this. "I thought about talking it out, "but I knew it would
just evolve into asking "if I'm still attracted to her. "And truthfully, I have
lost some attraction "over the last month or so, "though she does still look
amazing for the most part. "I thought it would be-" (Ian laughs) Yeah, I know. - Sorry. It's the "for the most part" for me. Okay. - "I thought it would be better "to take a more subtle approach, "so I've started adding
small amounts of sawdust "to her food." - No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! - I've never been more caught
off guard by a sentence. I'm sorry, let me... - Oh! - "I thought I would take
a more subtle approach, "so I've started adding
small amounts of sawdust "to her food. "The idea being it would
help her feel fuller faster "and encourage her to eat
less without her knowing. "I was trying to prevent
her from falling back "into her previous state
of depression and anxiety. "Unfortunately, my
brother, a 30-year-old man, "caught me in the act,
and he was shocked/angry. "He told me-" (Ian mimics saw buzzing) (Damien exhales) (Ian laughs) "He told me I was being
manipulative and abusive, "which, okay, a little shady maybe, "but abusive is a serious stretch." (crew laughs)
(Damien groans) "Now my brother is giving me an ultimatum. "He wants me to tell my
girlfriend what I've been doing "by the end of the week,
or he'll tell her himself. "He believes she deserves
to know the truth. "I think what I've been
doing is enough to help her "without causing her unnecessary pain "by revealing what I've done. "She's already lost a few pounds. "I told him I would stop, "and I believe that should be sufficient. "I don't see the point of telling her "and potentially destroying
the progress she's made. "My brother thinks I'm
completely in the wrong "and that my girlfriend
deserves the truth. "But I genuinely believe I was doing "what I thought would be best for her. "And I don't see it as a malicious act. "Am I really the jerk for
trying to help my girlfriend "in this way, or is my
brother overreacting? "Should I tell my girlfriend
what I've been doing "or keep it to myself
to spare her feelings? "I need honest opinions here. "Please keep in mind
that telling her upfront "that she's put on weight could seriously "set back her mental health." - Okay, well first off- - Sometimes you get a story
that you're just like... - I want to go to bed. (Shayne laughs) Like, I don't know how to continue my day. - I think we're missing
some serious context here. I need to know is this sawdust organic? - [Damien] That's a good point. - Yeah, is it keto? Keto sawdust.
- Yeah. - Let me read this comment really quick. "You're the asshole. "You were poisoning her food." OP responded, "It wasn't 'poison.' "It was sawdust. "I could see if I was adding
laxatives or something, "but plenty of processed
foods use sawdust as a filler. "I thought it was a safe way
to reduce her caloric intake." - So I think it's cellulose. 'Cause that was the whole
thing with Subway bread. Like, people were like,
"Subway bread has sawdust," because it's cellulose. - Got it. I will say sawdust has a lot of fiber. Ha cha cha cha cha. That's (beep) bad. - That's so insane. That's like also just like
robbing her of like the agency to like-
- [Damien] Yeah. - Oh yeah. - Like (groans) - It's yet another story here where we see like a man
looking at his partner and being like, "I love her so much. "She's so sweet. "I'm doing these crazy things to her "because I love her so much." Like, that's not love. That's control. And I also wanna point out like, look, sometimes age differences are fine. Sometimes it works out. But as the age difference gets bigger, there's more of a chance
for it to be like, this is a little creepy
and a little controlling. So when they got together,
he was 29, she was 21. It's an eight year age gap. And he's also like, "Yeah,
her self-esteem was terrible. "And there's an eight
year age difference." I'm like, well, you have all the power and control you could ever want. Good lord. - [Shayne] Yeah. - And now he's like, "Yeah,
I'm feeding her secretly." It's just, that's an unhealthy situation. - That's super creepy.
- No, it's super insane. - It's horrifying. - It's insane. Look, reading these Reddit stories, I do notice a correlation of when dudes are dating a
woman much younger than them, there's often controlling
habits from these men. - Like, a "I know better." - I do notice that they're
like, "I can help her. "I can fix this." And it's like, then that's
not a relationship to be in. Like, if you believe you're
superior to your partner, no, that's not good. That's not healthy. It's a bad mindset. That's controlling. - Also I guess it should be noted, if you wanna lose
weight, don't do sawdust. - [Damien] Oh my god. - [Shayne] Don't eat sawdust. - Like, don't eat sawdust. - If you're feeling like
shit, don't eat sawdust. That's gonna make you feel worse. - Sawdust is not gonna
make you feel better. - It's so sad because like so much is tied to, you know, people's weight, and everybody has so
much baggage tied to that in your own personal journey. And I don't know anybody who's ever like not
questioned their own weight. And certain people have like
really troubled histories with that. So for him to basically be implementing what would be the result
of like an eating disorder onto this person without their knowledge, it's truly horrific on so many levels. - Yeah, I don't know if I've ever heard of a secondary eating disorder before. - Like, Munchausen by proxy, but like- - He literally is like
Munchausen by proxying her in a weird way. Someone commented being
like, "You are the asshole. "For starters, I understand
that you're trying to help her "in your own way, but
please never add things "to people's food without their consent." - Yeah. - "She could have been allergic,"
or I mean, it's sawdust. I'm adding splinters to her oatmeal. - I mean, actually. - Someone commented saying like, "Have you made similar comments to her "that might be making her feel this way?" And he said, "No. "I would never say
something like that to her. "I know how damaging it could be. "I was trying to take
a two-pronged approach, "if that makes sense. "I thought if we had healthy habits "and she saw immediate results, "it would help her stay motivated." Look, we only have this story- - But sawdust and healthy are not- - We only have this story to go off of, but he's talking a lot about like, "Oh, but it makes her, "her mental health," and all this stuff. And I'm just like, it sounds
to me like you care more about this than her. And I think she's, I don't know, that's my
assumption based on this story from his perspective that she can, and he even admitted like, "Yeah, and it's affected
my attraction for her." I think he cares about her weight, and he's trying to use a bunch of excuses. - I think he cares about her weight a lot, and I also think not
speaking to her is for him more than her. He's like, "If I bring this up to her," because he's afraid to admit
to her that it matters to him, which yeah, that sucks, but
like he's afraid to bring it up, "then she's going to be
mad at me or feel sad "and then things are
gonna get worse for me." Like, none of this is
from a place of love. It's from a place of like ownership. - [Shayne] Yeah. - And it's really gross. - It's also a crime. - It's a crime, 100%. - I think this is a full on crime. - Putting sawdust in food? - Yeah. I would imagine this, at the very least, she
needs to get out of this. I hope his brother tells her, and I hope she runs for the hills. You're right about the cellulose. But is OP using cellulose
or literal sawdust? We don't know. What happens though if you eat sawdust. Sawdust is a human carcinogen. Eating sawdust can lead
to intestinal blockages as well as other gastrointestinal issues. He says she's been losing weight. I wonder if it's actually just causing- - She's already corked up. - [Shayne] Serious issues. - Yeah, 'cause I think
with the whole thing of like cellulose and
like the Subway breads, people go like, "Cellulose. "Well, cellulose is found in sawdust." I don't think Subway is
dumping actual sawdust in. It's just like it's
derived from that, I guess. - Well, these are the
dangers that people have when everyone thinks
they're a doctor, right? - That's a good point. - Look, man, you don't
understand this shit. He's clearly not a
nutritionist, he's not a doctor, he's not even a fitness
trainer or anything. And he's trying to make all
these executive decisions over her health. - Fittin' this sawdust in your food. (Damien laughs) - And his only measurement is weight, which is not an accurate
measurement of health. - That's a thing too. - He's so clearly obviously focused on, "Oh, I want my girlfriend to be hotter." - He's just poisoning her. - He's truly a monster. - [Ian] Creepy. - Well, beyond asshole,
actual terrifying man. If that woman watches these stories, run. I hope someone tells her. God damn.
- I'll do it. - All right, next story. Here we go. "Am I the asshole for taking a THC gummy "at a Christian wedding?" Hell yeah, man.
- Awesome. (everyone laughs) - Yeah! - Okay. - Praise to the most high. (everyone laughs) - Whoa. Jesus is just like... (crew laughs) - It's the one time those
wafers have tasted good. - Yeah. - Oh, do you want the rest of these? Just shoveling down the communion wafers like hand over fist.
- These are good, man. All right, here we go. "I, a 26-year-old man, was the plus one "for a wedding that my
roomie, a 27-year-old woman, "was in as a bridesmaid. "I had previously met the
couple, a male and female 28, "a few times, and they seemed fine. "I brought a pack of
five milligram gummies "that I would take during the reception, "and my roomie knew I was bringing them. "The wedding was small, about 60 people. "I knew going in that not
everyone was allowed plus ones, "but my roomie was as
she's in the bridal party. "The ceremony was nice, and
we moved to the reception. "I was seated with three bridesmaids "and two of the bride's college friends, "20s male female couple. "The wedding party left for pics, "and some food was brought
out, so I took a gummy. "I offered some to the
couple I was left with, "and they politely declined, "and I thought that was the end of that. "Some time passed and the
wedding party returned. "Right away the couple engaged
in a hushed conversation "with the bridesmaid sitting opposite me." - Oh, here we go. - "I couldn't hear over the music. "The couple's vibe changed. "And while we were talking as a table, "they would start responding
to things I was saying with, "'Oh, I wonder what other
fun things you're taking,' "and, 'Don't let the kids
hear you're doing that,' "in snarky-ish tones. "I became uncomfortable,
so I excused myself." - 'Cause he's high. - "Stepped out onto the patio. "Soon after, my roomie
stepped out and joined me. "She informed me that the
table started talking about me "when I left. "And the couple was appalled
to find out I brought gummies "to the reception. "They expressed their distaste for drugs "that aren't FDA approved and
are also apparently Christian, "which became clear when they stated "that this was a Christian wedding "and I should be more respectful "in not bringing addictive
drugs around a celebration "with kids present. "My roomie thought they were overreacting, "but the other bridesmaids
agreed with them "and debated kicking me out. "I was embarrassed "and didn't realize I
would cause such a reaction "as they had an open bar "and plenty of the people
were already buzzed, "that couple included. "We returned, and I apologized
and tried to explain "that the gummies are legal "and not addictive like
alcohol or other drugs. "The man seemed to think
that that was a jab at him "as he was already pretty drunk. "He interrupted me and said,
'You don't get to tell others "'how much they can drink at a wedding, "'especially when you're a plus one "'and we were actually invited.' "The convo died, and we
were dismissed for dinner. "I could hear a couple
a few people behind us "for the buffet still talking about it "and including others in the convo. "At that point, I felt unwelcome "and told my roomie I
was just going to wait "in the car outside. "She opposed that, but I told
her I'd be fine and left. "I stayed in the car for three hours. "When my roomie finally came, "she told me that when the
bride heard about this, "she didn't personally care, "but said I absolutely
shouldn't have brought edibles "as many of the attendees were Christian "and equated weed to meth or cocaine." - Okay. - Those are my favorite
parts of the Bible, you know? (everyone laughs) Where they talk about weed and
how it shouldn't be allowed. - Thou shall not toke. - [Shayne] That's so funny, dude. - I mean, that's crazy to me. Like, when it's so well
documented that like alcoholism is like such a huge issue. - It's (beep) awful. - And they're like, "You brought
addictive drugs." (gulps) Like, come on. - No, no, alcohol is so destructive. Like, you can't make that, yeah. - It's not, but like, you can't make that. But I will say for me, this is probably the most like eh one that I've ever heard on this show because like, full disclosure, like I don't think weed is that bad. Like, it is habit forming,
but it's not addictive. And as long as you're
like, like anything else, using things in moderation
and intelligently, like totally fine. But not everyone's on that same page, and societally like, I think we should be. I think trying to like
reduce marijuana presence does more harm than it does good. But that being said, like,
this is not your wedding. And not only that, it's not even something
you were invited to. You are a plus one. So like, while I wholeheartedly disagree with them being like,
"It's the same as meth," and, "Oh, I wonder what
else you're doing." Like, that's crappy and I think wrong. But also it's not their place to be like, "No, actually my thing is right." It's like, well, you
brought it to their wedding, and they don't want that, so oops. - And to your point, the
verdict here was everyone sucks. - Yeah. - And I do agree. I do think when you're
invited to a wedding, especially as a plus one, like there's a certain
level of respect of like, what is this wedding? What's the vibe? - Right. - Like, and you are bringing something that people may be uncomfortable with. Is it right that they're
uncomfortable with? That's up for debate, but
it's not your wedding. Like, the whole point of
a wedding is kind of like, now I do think it sucks that if the bride and groom are fine with it, then it's like, all right, then it's fine. Like, these do sound like shitty people, but if that's the vibe of
this wedding, you know? I don't know. That is tough. - If I was going to
like a Christian wedding with a bunch of people
that I did not know, I would not think, "You know what? "I'm gonna get high there." That sounds like a bad time. - It's only 60 people
total, so it's also small. - That's big too. - I also think it's a
lot that he, you know, it's also one of those
things too where it's like, hey, if you're gonna do this, don't like go around offering it to other people you don't know. Like, don't blow your cover then. Like, if you're someone
who can subtly do it and nobody's gonna know... You know, you can still
debate on the ethics of that, but you're going around
offering it to other people. You clearly made them uncomfortable. - Or vibe check 'em first. - Yeah, vibe check for sure.
- Be smarter about it. - And that does sort of bring
up like the culture of alcohol versus the culture of weed, you know, at least how it is
generally viewed nowadays by like older generations. Like, there is a thing where
like if you go to a wedding and you don't know a lot of people, you can keep a thing of
alcohol in your trunk. And like when you meet
someone cool, just be like, "Hey, like, come out to my car." And they're like, "What?" And it's like, "You know,
I got stuff in the trunk," and it's like, "Oh shoot." And you end up having like
four or five people join you at the trunk. Like, that's a thing that people do. But like weed culture is so hit and miss. And like, again, if it's a 60 person, like if it were a 200 person wedding, it was a party venue and everyone's young, and someone's like,
"Oh, Benifer got high." It's like, all right. - It's pretty intimate. - It's 60 people in like a church. And it's like the odds of you
ending up in a conversation with Memaw and Pap Pap is
like, that's pretty high. - Yeah. - I don't think that would be fun. - [Shayne] Yeah. - It was definitely an odd choice. - Not very self-aware choice. I have a feeling, hearing
how these people reacted, I feel like a quick vibe
check, you'd have been like, "Oh, not my audience." - Yeah. - I like to think that
this person actually just got so high and nobody cared, but they were so paranoid and they thought everyone
was talking about them. And they're like, "I'm
just gonna go to the car." - They were all actually so fine with it. - They're actually like really excited. Be like, "What other
fun things do you take?" Like, they really mean it. - He's like, "Oh my god,
they're grilling me right now." - I will say, when you do meet
someone in that situation, like it is very rude of them to be like, "What other things are you taking? "Like, make sure you
don't talk to the kids." Like, that is pretty messed up. The way I like to interact with people when I like know they're really high, and like it's, you know,
it doesn't bother me, but I'd like to do a little
game where I just look at them and I go, "They're
coming, they're coming!" And I'm like, "Everyone's mad at you! "They're coming!" And I sort of see what they do. It's really funny to me. - You know what a fun prank that they all could have pulled on him is halfway through the wedding,
he goes to the bathroom, they all take off their
clothes, leave it on the ground, and then they all disappear. He goes, "The rapture!" (everyone laughs) - Yeah, and they all got raptured 'cause they're good Christians. - I'm sorry. - Oh no! I took the weed. That's why I'm still here. (everyone laughs) My point of view got overshadowed by them bringing up like
Christian beliefs of weed. And I'm like, what is this? Like, this is where it shows like... Look, this is my point of view. I've seen people talk about it. Like, American Christianism is just not Christianity anymore. - It's just its own thing. - It's just this weird
thing where we have, it's all points of view on
American issues and things that they just say are Christian. It's like there's nothing
in the Bible about weed. - Well, that was funny. - You know, this guy, it sounds
like he learned his lesson. He put an edit in saying,
"Thanks for the feedback. "Overall lesson learned. "I'm not gonna sweat it though
since they were pretty catty, "and I'll never see any of them again." Fair. I guess if he's never gonna
see 'em again, whatever. But he won't do that again hopefully. - But it does shine bad upon his roommate. - It's true. He should care for his roommate. You know what, that's actually fair. I almost think to a degree, you know what? My take, maybe people disagree, you're the asshole only to your friend, that you kind of like got
invited to this wedding, you should only be thinking of like, "Hey, what makes them look good and bad?" - Were we aware? Was the roommate aware that
this was going to happen? - Yeah, the roommate
seemed all good with it. So I guess that's- - Yeah, if it's like, "Hey,
I'm gonna do this thing." Like, you probably should be like, "Hey, by the way, my family's
super like not down for-" - That's a good point,
that's a good point. - But I guess the roommate was fine. The roommate stayed for
the whole wedding and- - So the roommate's the asshole! - I say the car is the asshole. Divorce the people, marry their parents. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. - [Damien] Done. - Next story. This is from Relationship Advice. - We got this.
- We got this. - So good. - This is a 26-year-old woman. "I left trip early because
my boyfriend, who's 28, "and his friends embarrassed me to tears." - Oh.
- Oh. - Okay. "Okay, strap in because
this is the most bizarre "and embarrassing thing that
has ever happened to me. "Throwaway account, first
time poster, et cetera. "So I went on a ski trip with
my boyfriend and his friends. "It's their annual trip,
and the first time I went. "We've been together for two years. "The group that goes is him
and five of his friends, "four guys and one girl all late 20s. "I have met two of the guys before, "but the other two and the
girl I've only met briefly "over FaceTime. "They knew I was coming on the trip, "so they VRBO this house about 10 minutes "from the ski resort."
- Oh my god. - "We are a few days in
for this weekly trip, "and everything is fine. "The only problem has
been the bathroom doors "don't seem to lock. "Important for later. "There had been some near
embarrassing moments, "but nothing major
until day four of seven. "I'm not a huge drinker, "especially around
people I don't know well. "I wanted to just nurse a
drink while we all talked "and they drank. "We haven't been eating the
best and have pizza before this. "My stomach was bothering me, "so I excused myself to the
bathroom on the main floor. "I should have gone in the one upstairs, "but you know what they
say about hindsight. "So I'm on the toilet,
obviously taking a poop, "when the doorknob starts to move. "I am in here, but his female
friend comes in anyway. "I don't know if it is because it was me "or she was too drunk to hear or care. "She honestly smells what's going on "and makes a big ruckus
to the rest of the group "that I'm pooping. "I told her to please get
out as calmly as I could "because I was starting to get very upset. "She was making a big deal
over a normal bodily process. "So she goes to leave the bathroom, "but basically throws open
the bathroom door to do so. "Three of the four guys
are there in the hallway, "and she's exposed me to them. "Now I'm very upset and mortified. "I yelled at her to get out and
to shut the door behind her. "They all are standing in the doorway "and not listening to me. "My boyfriend notices what is going on "and comes into the bathroom. "I think he's going to
yell at his friends, "but instead the drunk asshole
comments on how bad it smells "in the bathroom. "He leaves, but doesn't
take his friends with him. "They continue to point and laugh "while I'm in a vulnerable state. "I think they were making potty jokes, "all while I'm sat on the
toilet, pants at my ankles, "keeping my knees locked shut. "I start screaming at this point "to get the (beep) outta the bathroom "and shut the (beep) door over and over. "I am actually crying at this
point because I'm so mortified "and I've never been in
such a bizarre situation. "My crying and screaming "finally got the drunkards' attention. "She shuts the door behind her. "Now I'm breaking down in the bathroom. "I'm still crying and
trying to get sorted, "so I can be done and wash my hands "and get the hell out of this room. "While washing my hands, "all I can think is that my
boyfriend didn't help at all. "I know they're drunk, "but I don't think
that's much of an excuse. "They've just been drinking beer, "and I think he'd had four so far. "I'm absolutely mortified "and decide to just go into the bedroom. "However, when I come outta the bathroom, "still crying a bit, by the way, "all six of them start
howling with laughter "and pointing at me. "It's like one of those crazy nightmares "where everything seems more dramatic "than real life should be. "I just look at my
boyfriend, meet his eyes "and everything to show how
upset I am, and they don't stop. "I go upstairs to our room and pack. "I can't go three more
days with these people, "and I don't wanna sleep in the same bed "as my drunk boyfriend. "Drunk or not, "they're being incredibly
disrespectful and childish. "I don't think I've ever
been so embarrassed. "I finished packing, change
my flight to the next morning, "and order an Uber to
go to the airport hotel. "I gather all of my things "and walk downstairs to
get my coat and leave. "They all start laughing
when I come back in the room, "but boyfriend finally
notices I have bags with me. "I silently put my coat on. "Boyfriend yells, 'Where
the (beep) are you going?' "'Airport,' is all I say. "Now he is yelling, and
they're all yelling, "saying it was just in good
fun and I should lighten up, "have another beer, et cetera. "No one apologizes, not even boyfriend. "He just seems so mad that I'm leaving. "I tell him I'll see him in a few days "and walk out to my Uber. "Once I'm finally in my hotel room later, "I curl up in bed and cry. "I definitely did not see this
being the way my trip ended. "Once I flew home the next morning "and got back to my apartment,
I had so many texts, "missed calls, and
voicemails from my boyfriend. "They ranged from apologetic
to angry to accusing "as if I did something wrong "by going to the freaking bathroom. "I haven't responded yet, and
he comes home in two days. "I haven't even read all of the texts "because it got more upset. "How the (beep) am I supposed
to face these people again? "It just seems like the most
bizarre and surreal experience. "I think I'm more upset that
my boyfriend did nothing, "even when I was screaming and crying. "He didn't stop me from leaving,
he didn't follow me out. "He just yelled at me "and asked me where
the (beep) I was going. "How could he not make sure I'm okay? "Even now I was upset enough to leave, "and his texts that I did
read are not supportive. "No apology. "Basically, I put a damper on the trip. "I'm dramatic. "It wasn't that bad. "But I made a terrible
impression with his friends. "What about their impression of me? "Because I'm having some
pretty strong thoughts. "Right now, I still have a boyfriend. "That might be changing in a few days. "I love him, but I do not
like his reaction to all this. "Why the (beep) am I getting blamed? "I did not receive this
type of deal breaker." What the (beep) - I mean, like, it's so funny
'cause like I was thinking and then she said it, like, this feels like one of
those like nightmares. Like, legit. Like, "Oh, she's pooping! "Everyone look!" And everyone's like, "Hahaha." - This truly sounds like
the logic of like a sketch that we would write. - Yeah. - Where it's like, oh
yeah, this is so insane. This would never happen in real life. - It's so bizarre. Like, and also, you
know, when she was like, "Well, I love my boyfriend." I'm like, you've never met your boyfriend because that was your boyfriend. When you've had a few drinks and you're laughing
along with your friends, like that's your boyfriend right there. And I just... How could you ever get that trust back? - I do almost see a version where this could have been a
funny moment for everybody, but she made it very clear that it wasn't, and they didn't apologize. And I think it's one of those like, it's almost like one of those
like mob mentality moments, like, when like everybody
gets on board with something, it's like hard to like shift
that sort of like thinking, you know what I mean? - Yeah. - And like it's, I mean, she has every right to be angry, and like I think the boyfriend at this point is probably embarrassed. Like, it's clear that
he's like thinking more about himself of like,
"How does this look for me? "Because now my girlfriend
seems ridiculous and crazy." But it's like, yeah, she had every right
to feel embarrassed. She was exposed to a group of people. - That's the thing. Like, exposed to a bunch of
people like involuntarily. Like, that's a huge violation. - Yeah! The girl like enabled it. - So like yeah, which
is absolutely so rough. And on top of that, like to
have the boyfriend use the, excuse me, specific phrasing of like, "Where the (beep) are you going?" That is violent language to
use against someone like that. And I don't care, like, I don't care if someone is
making direct eye contact with you and making lava plops
in the middle of the floor. Like, if they're like, "I need help," you're just like, "Got it." Like, there needs to be a point of like, there's no more joking. Like, when you're being tickled and you're about to throw up,
you need to be like, "Stop!" And eventually someone gets it. - Right. - Wow. - And he's known her for two years. He's been in a relationship
with her for two years. He should know her
comfort levels on things. - Yeah. - You know, they're not
on the set of "Jackass." Like, this is real life. And he should know that with
people that she's just met for the first time especially,
like this is not okay at all. She's making it very apparent. - Yeah, I don't see this
as something that like, it's like, oh, you need to dump him. But I think this is a very
big learning opportunity for this guy and the friends. - I think you need to dump him. - We got a bunch of comments here. Someone said, "(beep) that guy. "The fact that he wasn't furious "with his asshole buddies
invading your privacy "shows his character. "You weren't his girlfriend that night. "You were their entertainment. "Dump his ass and never look back. "He obviously does not respect you." Someone else said, "You know
this relationship is over. "He didn't have your back." Someone else said, "Okay, so I went through a
similar situation minus the poop "with my ex at his brother's birthday. "It was a nightmare. "Everyone else was making fun
of me and getting (beep) up, "and I was in the middle of
nowhere stuck with these people, "and my boyfriend would
only come to check on me "to tear down more and yell at me, "which meant I would hide more and cry, "which would piss him off more. "Repeat for three days
as I had no way home. "It won't get better. "I don't know why I thought it might "or why I didn't care more, "but that relationship almost ruined me. "Your partner should have your back, "otherwise, what's the point? "Do what I wasn't brave enough
to do and forget this guy." I do agree. This is like... It was just this such a prolonged
amount of him not caring about her, like so long. And like even the days of all the texts and stuff not apologizing, it's like, you've had time to
think about this, you know? - Yeah, but I don't think he has. Do you know what I mean? Like, he's still with those people that are enabling that thinking. - But that would scare
me to be with someone who I'd be like, "Oh, if you're influenced "by the right people,
you could (beep) me up." - Oh, for sure, yeah, yeah, for sure. - So, but wait, what were we gonna say? - I was just gonna say
also like, you know, if he has been with her for
two years and he hasn't, like say for instance, let's give him the benefit
of the doubt, and he's like, "I really didn't know she was mad." Like, that is a colossal
problem because after two years, you should know your
partner's comfort level. You should know, you know,
when they're joking around and when they're being
like, "I need your help." And if you're still after two
years being like (chuckles) Like, that's not even a matter
of like not having her back. Like, that is antagonistic. That is a problem. It's scary. Icky. - And at like 28, I don't know, man. - They're 28? - [Shayne] He's 28. - That's a manchild. Get him outta there. - It is scary. - Push him in the pit. - So there is an update. - All right.
- Oh god, let's see. Am I gonna like it, Shayne? - He got back. Did they fix it? - He poops too to make it up to her. - She starts, "Possible
trigger warning, drug use." - Ooh.
- Okay, so... "So boyfriend came home a day after I did. "He called me before his flight "and asked to come over to my
apartment when he got back. "I agreed. "I needed a flipping explanation
for their bizarre behavior "before I could decide what
to do in our relationship. "He's been wonderful and
respectful for two years "and then that? "At that point, "I decided I didn't wanna
see his friends again. "They're unimportant to me. "So he gets here, I let him in, "and right away I see he is
noticeably nervous and twitchy. "He sits on my couch. "I sit separately on my recliner. "He blurts out, 'Are we over?' "Depends on what you have to say "unless you want it to be over. "He says 'no' before I finish. "Okay then, "so I tell him to explain
what the (beep) happened. "So he and his genius
friends took LSD and shrooms. "Female friend took shrooms only. "The guys were a mix of both with alcohol. "My boyfriend said he took LSD only. "I flipped a bit. "Why the (beep) didn't he tell me? "What if one of them had a
really bad reaction or trip? "Shouldn't the one person "who didn't take drugs know they did "to be able to keep them safe? "I've done it, and I
wouldn't have judged them. "He knew I'd tried in
college and had a bad time, "like nightmare fuel bad. "No real answer on that. "It is his decision to
take something like that. "But I am more upset that they
weren't really safe about it. "That wasn't okay to omit that. "He agreed that was a dumb decision. "He said it's been about six
years since they last tried it. "I asked him to explain
his asshole behavior "the next morning then. "He says he and guy friends
didn't remember the reality "of what happened. "But shocker, female friend B did. "The bitch that she is laughed "when explaining it later that afternoon. "The guys were horrified. "Boyfriend is rethinking
friendship with her. "I said, 'I never wanna see her again.' "Not an ultimatum, just a fact. "So once he knew he was embarrassed "and didn't want to
apologize over phone or text, "so he came home early. "He took the time to get his itinerary "and thoughts sorted, he says. "He asked for my side of it, "and I just let him read my first post. "It was too hard to say. "He gave me a huge hug after, "apologizing between
forehead and cheek kisses. "We agreed to work through it. "I could practically smell his relief. "He thought I was done with him. "I did too before we talked
and got an explanation. "We set boundaries. "No secrets, "even if we think the
other is going to be upset. "Better to talk through
things than have issues later. "My main sticking point was
that I didn't want that B "in our lives. "The fact that she acted that
way when she was mostly sober "and could recant the entire thing "while laughing is unacceptable. "I don't know what kind
of personality trait "or disorder makes that possible,
but I don't give a (beep) "She's disgusting." - I diagnose her as a pick me. (everyone laughs) - Ding, ding, ding. - "He understood and messaged
the guys in front of me. "He told them I was giving
him a second chance, "and he explained what happened. "They asked if they could
FaceTime us later to apologize. "We said yes, but without B. "They understood and agreed. "Their apologies later that
night were all very sweet "and genuine. "Boyfriend spoke with B a few days later "and then blocked her all while beside me. "These last couple of months,
he has really stepped up "and shown me how important I am to him "and how much he loves me. "We both upheld our side of
the boundary of no secrets. "It's actually been awesome "to just talk through any
issues, feelings, et cetera. "We were great before
this bizarre incident, "but things are strangely better now. "I wouldn't have thought that
when I wrote my first post. "We are talking about moving
in with one another next year. "B did try to reach out several times, "but more so after my post was on TikTok. "She was screaming that
I needed to take it down. "It's not like anybody has any
idea who she is in real life "for (beep) sake, the drama. "Boyfriend's friend group
has all shut her out "since the trip. "Apparently she's always had an excuse "about why a new girlfriend
of theirs didn't like her "or misheard her."
- Oh. - "She's created more
issues than they realize "during their 14 year friendship. "My boyfriend knows I have no issues "with him having friends of any gender "but agrees we don't
need her stereotypical "female best friend behavior in our lives. "I don't know if she has
feelings for any of them "or just likes their attention, "but whatever it is no longer my problem. "I don't know if this is
the update you hoped for "or if you are all rooting for
boyfriend to get dumped hard, "but please know I'm genuinely
happy with my outcome. "Thanks for taking our own
crazy trip with my story "and update. "Had to make light of it. "You all have been wonderfully
sweet and supportive. "It was incredibly appreciated." Wow. - Yeah, okay, okay. So I don't feel so bad about my stance. I mean, they worked it out. I felt like they could. - I mean, sure. I didn't predict that this was happening. - No, I didn't, I didn't. - I went with her assumption
of four beers, you know? But to be fair, I don't know
a ton about like what LSD and shrooms, you know, how much that would
affect your mental state where this situation would be handled. I can't speak to that. - Yeah, there's some
serious dumbassery there. I don't know why you wouldn't- - I definitely do not
like that they all took it and didn't tell her.
- That's what I was gonna say. - [Shayne] That's crazy to me. - This doesn't absolve anything for me because there's a couple things that are majorly wrong with this. One, she did not consent
to being in a room with a bunch of people who are on a little
bit more hallucinogenic and heavy drugs. I'm not one to judge drug use. You know, do what you gotta do safely. But like that's a lot to deal with. To be the only sober
person in that scenario, like, that's a lot. - It's a big responsibility.
- Huge responsibility. - And like if someone
actually does get hurt and you've gotta call medical authorities, it's like, what's going on? It's just like, "I guess he fell down." Like, they would need to know that. And thing number two is the fact that all of those friends
together decided to do that and he just didn't tell the girlfriend- - It's weird. - Says a lot about the relationship to me. It's like she's a problem or a wet blanket or like, you know, well
it's gonna be a fun thing for we to do, but like don't tell Bethica, or like, it's just-
- Super weird. - There's so much wrong with it there. And like the fact that it's like, "He apologized and gave
me a forehead kiss." I'm like, yuck, yuck, gross. Like, I wanna recoil at that. Like, I'm glad she's happy, I really am, and I'm trusting this
adult to know what is best for herself. But like it still doesn't sound safe. And just because that other girl was a huge problematic
influence on these people doesn't mean they didn't still like engage in this behavior time and time again. They're like, "Yeah, it's the typical like
female jealous best friend." It's like, okay, sure, she's rough, but four people got puppeted
by that I guess at best. Like... - So we got some comments here. Man. Someone said, "Good luck
wasting your years with him." Damn. - I mean, kind of. - Someone else said, "So your partner got high with his buddies "without clueing you in,
mortifyingly embarrassed you, "and pinned it all on a girl. "Sounds like a charming group of guys." - Yeah. - Someone else said, "OP, I've been on shrooms
and LSD and let me tell you, "it doesn't wipe your memory. "They all knew what happened. "You especially remember when
you are laughing hysterically "and making a big deal about something. "Nah, he and his friends ain't it." Last comment we have here is, "This is literally an insane update. "There is nothing in this world "that would make me forgive anyone "who interacted with me like that. "Do you have difficult family members "who you are often forced to forgive "in order to live peacefully? "If so, "analyze if this is just
that behavior being repeated. "Being alone would be
better than being with a man "who so deeply disrespected you." Yeah, I also wanna point
out in the original post, even after all of this,
before this update, she still was like, "I
don't know, I love him, "but I do not like this is his reaction." So that wasn't the end of the line before she found out about all
this drug use and everything. I do think she is-
- It's tough. - I don't know. I tend to kind of side
with these comments. And yes, she's an adult. She's allowed to make her own decisions. She's allowed. She has every right to go
about this as she wants. But I mean this is... I agree with you that
there's a lot to this. The original post was in
March, the update is in July. So she's been saying for months
things have felt way better. I just, maybe this is a
very shitty thing to say. I am skeptical of what her idea
of like, "Things are great." I'm just like-
- That's tough, yeah. - Man, like, I don't know. But we only have this story to go off of. But it seems like all the
comments are skeptical on it. - Yeah, I mean I think really, you know, our relationship advice tends to lean towards everyone
saying "dump his ass." And most of the time, like a lot of times these
stories involve some form of abuse, in which case
I'm all for being like, "That's abuse, that's an abuser. "Cut him out." - [Shayne] Yeah. - This I'm like, this is
a really shitty situation. This was extremely disrespectful. I think you can learn
from something like that. And I think you can grow
from something like that. To me, and this is obviously not my life, but I think it's something you
can grow from and grow past. - I have a thought on that, 'cause I think it is very valid
to like talk about wanting to learn from mistakes and grow. Like, I think not just
on, you know, this format, but like societally in general
when we hear something rough, we're just like, "That's it done." So like I understand that
there probably should be a path for redemption in a lot of cases unless someone's safety is concerned. I think though what that
requires is accountability. And you would have to look
at the situation and be like, "What was actually wrong
with this at its core?" And I think that was a
lot of what we were saying about like the disrespect that came from like not telling
someone, yada, yada, yada. And it seems like the
resolution of this was like, "He's gonna be nicer, "and he is not hanging out
with that mean girl anymore. "He won't do drugs again." As opposed to like, "No,
you made the active choice "to really mess with me "and like put me in a
very dangerous situation." Like, that would've to be addressed, and you'd have to grow from that. And if that ends up happening, great. - 'Cause she doesn't
list any like examples, but she just keeps saying like, "We've had full honesty for months." They say this girl had been
their friends for 14 years, so I'm assuming these
are high school friends. So the excuse that I could see
some people saying is like, you know, they're falling into old habits, old high school habits. I still- - Boys club type. - Yeah, and one girl. I think all I can say is
if I was in this situation, it would be less about like, "Oh, you're bad and I need to
dump you because you suck," and more that I'd just be like, "I don't know if I can recover from this. "Like, I don't know if I can mentally." Now that's me saying my
own personal reaction to these things. You know, and also like the
under the influence excuse, I just don't buy it. And like look, these
people in the comments, like I said, I don't
have personal experience, but a lot of people are saying like, "Hey look, I've done shrooms and LSD, "and you don't forget things. "Like, he's lying to you." If he's saying you guys have full honesty and he's lying about that still, then he's lying about you guys being on this full honesty kick right now. And at the very least I would say to her, I'd be like, "At least, you know, "you guys are saying
you have full honesty, "but if something happens now,
if something happens again, "you need to walk."
- He's on notice. - [Shayne] Yeah. - For sure. Oh yeah, I mean he's gotta do
a lot of work to regain trust. - Yes.
- [Ian] Absolutely. - Yeah. Well anyway, that's crazy. - That's a wild one.
- Bonkers. - [Shayne] That's nuts.
- He sounds like a dumbass. - He really does.
- He does sound stupid. He does sound very stupid. - He just sounds like a dumbass. Not that I'm excusing his
behavior, but he's a dumbass. - There are a lot of stories
we read where it's like, okay, is there asshole-ery
exceeding their stupidity? Like, which one is leading the charge? - This is stupid, this is stupid. - There's like that, god,
a philosophical theorem about like you should never assume malice when I think it's like ignorance or stupidity can like serve just as well. But then there's the
addendum to that of like at a certain point stupidity
is indistinguishable from malice. It's like yeah, you might just be stupid, but you're still messing things up. - At a certain point,
it also doesn't matter. - [Damien] Yeah, that's I'm saying. - This is someone that you're
supposed to be relying on. - Yeah. - And that's scary. - That's somehow worse. It's like, "Oh, you're too stupid for me "to have you be by my side." - All right, next story. "Am I the asshole for ordering more food "after I heard we were
splitting the check?" Nice. - We can just skip this one. Yeah. For sure. - Okay, so, "I, a 21-year-old
guy, and a few friends went "to celebrate a mutual friend's birthday. "It was organized by his partner, "and we were planning on going "to a kind of upscale
restaurant in our city. "Think suit and tie dress code enforced. "I showed up with my girlfriend, "and we were having a good time. "We checked the prices beforehand, "and me and my girlfriend set
a budget we wouldn't go over "since we have other priorities "besides dumping it all on a dinner party. "We ordered the food and
are having a good time. "We stay under budget. "But I notice my friend's partner
continuously ordering more "and more expensive drinks and foods. "I don't think much of it since
it's his partner's birthday. "But when the bill comes, "the table of 10 is suddenly
told the gifts we're expected "to give is for us to split the check. "Now, it's my friend's birthday, "and I've known him for close to a decade. "I would've been fine splitting his bill, "however expensive it should be. "To put it into perspective, "me and my girlfriend's bill
came out to just under $200, "give or take. "The entire bill was nearing $800, "and they still wanted to get dessert. "I noticed me and my girlfriend
had the least amount of food "and didn't get multiple
appetizers, drinks, et cetera. "The thing is I know I'm
more financially stable "than my friends my age "since I really just had the cosmic luck "of landing a decent job out of school. "So I could have contributed, "but frankly I felt this was
a trap to get me to pay more "than we budgeted. "If they communicated prior to
the dinner as an obligation, "that's one matter,
but suddenly telling us "after everyone is mostly done
eating dinner seems sketchy "at the very least. "I had a quick text
conversation with my girlfriend, "and we both decided to
order expensive desserts "raising the price even more. "Now suddenly when the bill comes, "some people, especially
my friend's boyfriend, "doesn't have enough money
to split the bill equally "between everyone. "They started bickering
in a public restaurant, "and my friend accuses me of
intentionally raising the bill "outside of their budget. "I counter with how it was kind of rude "to just expect people
to pay stuff for him. "And he said it's his birthday. "To keep the peace, I
paid for only his meal, "but left his drink and dessert tab "for everyone else to split. "I left with my girlfriend
and paid our bills. "When we were leaving, "they were still arguing over the bill. "That was yesterday. "I woke up this morning to
find on multiple social media "how I'm such a terrible person, "how I raised the bill
by ordering extra food. "Mind you, they were
all planning on desserts "while we weren't. "My girlfriend says I did
the moral thing of paying "for my friend's food, "but I'm livid I got
peer pressured into it. "Am I the asshole?" Some info here. "Decided to put the vague prices "since I know my friends have Reddit. "Me and my girlfriend's
bill came up to $200, "just entrees plus one
appetizer we split." - Wow. - "The bill was nearing $800 "at just entrees plus appetizers. "The final bill came out to 1.2K-ish. "But the crime comes in "when you add up the additional drinks. "For 10 people, it came out to 2K plus. "And most importantly, myself
and my girlfriend didn't drink "since we worked this morning." - Wow, wow! - Wow. - I mean, that changes things,
the drink part for sure. - Yeah, bro. - Wait, wait, wait. So they spent $1,000 on just alcohol? - They spent 2K plus. - They spent 2,000 plus. They spent 1,200 on food
and over 2,000 on drinks? - So doing an even split for them, that would've total been around 600 bucks before tax and tip, combining their share
of drinks and appetizer. - The way he wrote it out is strange. The overall bill was over $2,000. - Got it. - But they didn't have any drinks. - So they didn't share in
that split of the drinks? - Yeah, I mean, regardless of
the amount, it is very high. I think for most people's,
you know, monetary income, if you're very wealthy, this
isn't even a discussion. But for anybody who this matters
to, this is a lot (laughs) This is a lot of money. - It's a lot of money. - So like I personally have an issue with splitting a bill usually because I don't drink because
I don't order as much. When people are like,
"Appetizer, appetizer. "Well, the whole table's
gonna have a bite. "Get it." It's just like (groans) It kind of frustrates me, but like... - Especially at a really expensive place. - That's really tough. And I think there's a common thread here, 'cause we also had that other one, that other Reddit story
a few episodes back where someone was like, "I'm
throwing a party for myself "and I wanna charge my friends admission." I don't think on your
birthday it's ever a good move to be like, "Everybody pay for this for me "'cause it's my special
day and I'm a special boy." - Yeah. It's weird.
- I think if you're at dinner and someone is like, you
know, it's their birthday, you can like whisper
to people and be like, "Shayne, man, we got this. "No, no, no, don't pull out that wallet. "We got this. "We'll split for you." - Right. - Otherwise that sucks. - Yeah, also I will say like, good point. The birthday boy is
the (beep) asshole here because they said, "Well,
everyone's gonna pay for me. "I'm gonna find the most
expensive restaurant in my city, "and they're gonna pay for me." What?
- And he didn't let at least some of them
know until they were done. - Yeah. - [Shayne] That's insane. - That's insane. - That's absolutely insane behavior. - That's like a reverse treat. Like, once everyone's eating
it's just like, "Hey everyone-" - [Ian] You're paying for it. - "This meal's on me." Like, he did it wrong. It's like, "Everyone, give me $500." - Yeah, it's absolutely absurd. It sounds like some of the
friends were in on it though on like the split, and they
were trying to like amp it up. The fact that they didn't drink, but then everyone got mad at
them for having a smaller bill- - Order some more. - This all seems so shady and weird. - I mean, like, yeah. - Also the OP is 21. (laughs) - Oh my god, they don't
have that kind of money. What? - Well, he said he got
lucky and has a decent job, but it doesn't matter. Like, they were trying to budget, they were trying to do their thing. - It also like-
- Dude, I'd be so- Sorry.
- Sorry no. I was just gonna say like,
even if they do have the money, like (sighs) Money is like... Money's a tricky thing. Like, that is tied to
so many things in life. And regardless of whether
or not someone makes money, you might wanna budget, you might wanna live below your means. Like, it doesn't mean you should just be a huge spender
all the time, right? So just because they're assuming like, "Oh, he makes good money." Like yeah, he can help out his friend, and if he wants to help
out just his friend, great. But that assumption sucks. And at first, like when
you're reading the story, I was like, "Oh, you're ordering
the most expensive desserts "to ratchet up the bill. "That's kind of spiteful. "You're doing it intentionally. "You didn't even want dessert. "That sucks." And now I'm just like,
"All right, do your thing." - Yeah, I mean like- - 'Cause they paid for their own food. So they didn't ratchet up the bill. They paid for their own food. They removed it from the bill. - Did they? Okay, I missed that. - Someone said, "ROFL. "If I was you, I would
pay only for my own food "along with the girlfriend "and let the others split their food "if that's what they wish. "It's inappropriate and
rude to attend a birthday, "order food, and then say,
'We're gonna split it all.' "That's not how birthdays work, "but it's a good way
to manipulate someone. "Not the asshole." Someone else said, "When I read the title, "I was so ready for you to be
the asshole in this situation, "but nope, I don't think you are. "I think it's really shitty behavior "when people know that
they're splitting a bill, "so they start ordering
cocktails, multiple hor d'oeuvres, "expensive main courses, et cetera. "It's clear that everyone was doing this "because they expected you to cover it. "I can't believe that your friend "actually allowed you to pay for his meal "after everything that happened. "If that was me, I would've
been so embarrassed "and would've insisted on
paying for my own food to prove "that I wasn't just using
my friend for free food." Yeah, I will say like, you know, yeah, a birthday's
your special day to a degree. I do think selfish people
often use it as an excuse. - 100%. - Like, it's like, oh, here's my my get outta
jail free card today. It's like, no man, you
could still be an asshole on your birthday. - Yeah. - Like, there's still rules, there's still etiquette,
there's still respect. - It's the Purge! It's my birthday. It's the Purge. You can do whatever. - There's also like way easier ways to just like be responsible
for what you ate at a restaurant. It's called Venmo, bro. You take a picture of
the receipt and you go, "You did that, you did that,
you did that, you did that. "Tip is what? "Okay, we all split that," and you Venmo that person the amount. - Right. - And then you don't have to like, like it always puts such
a damper on the mood of like a good night
out with your friends, and you're all having a great time, you have a couple drinks, the bill comes, and it's like this mad
like kind of thing of like, "Okay, who's paying for what? "Like, okay, like you got that." It's like, bro, just take
a picture of the receipt. Like, give everybody your Venmo. One person puts their credit card down. You get some sick points and then- - Good point. - And then, you know, you
just hold people accountable for paying you back on Venmo. - And if someone doesn't pay you back, you don't ever get dinner
with that person again. - Well, you shake 'em down. (Shayne laughs) - You dangle him off a roof. - Like, if you ever have trouble,
I'll be right behind you. I'll be like, "What're you trying to do?" (Shayne laughs) - No, I remember talking this one guy that he was on this thing with like a bunch of like
rich people, and they went to this like nice like
Michelin star restaurant, and then one of the people said like, "Oh, he's good for it," like
in the middle of the dinner. And he's like, "What the (beep)" And he literally like
chased down the people later for their money. - Yeah. - I can't imagine- - People he didn't even
like know that well. - I can't imagine thinking that way of just assuming
someone's gonna cover you. I'm just glad that I don't feel
like this is an issue I deal with with my friends,
so that's all I can say. - Yeah. - I stole from you for years
when we were roommates. - Well, that's all right. - Sold your blood. - Anthony did it to Ian too. - I heard about that. - Pennies, but it adds up. - I think like really
the ultimate solution for this problem is just get rich. - Get rich or die trying. - Or die trying. - Yeah. My guy. Hey, my guy. - All right, next story. Well, that was crazy. That was crazy. It can't get worse than that. "Am I the asshole for calling
my eight-year-old niece ugly?" - Let's go.
- Let's hear them out. Let 'em cook. - This was posted today as of reading. - Oh really? - [Shayne] Reading this
right now, it says today. - This is some alpha male shit. - So someone called their
eight-year-old niece ugly today. - Great. - Okay. This is a 20-year-old dude. "My older sister, who's 32, "and her husband have an
eight-year-old niece who I adore. "She's smart, extremely
precocious, and very funny. "She's also simply put
very unfortunate looking." - Just such an ugo. - I'm sorry, I'm sorry. That's so... - Look, you're smart. You're smart and stuff,
but you're freaking ugo. - "Neither her parents are ugly, "but she received the
worst possible combination "of their features."
- Oh no. - "Maybe in time she'll
grow into it with time, "but currently she is, as I
said, unfortunate looking. "My sister and her husband
try to circumvent this "by constantly calling
her pretty, beautiful, "gorgeous, et cetera. "I get that every parent is
going to see their kid that way, "but I don't think it's a good idea "to constantly praise her for beauty. "Why? "Kids are cruel, "and they'll let her
know she's not beautiful. "So all praising her
looks does is reinforce "that beauty is something to
be desired and praised for, "all the while with her
knowing she doesn't have it. "It's much better, in my
opinion, to boost her self-esteem "off the many good traits she does have, "so she doesn't have to rely
on looks for her confidence. "My sister and her husband
don't seem to understand this "or disagree with it,
which is fair enough. "Their call as parents. "But they insist that I
call her beautiful too. "And I said no and explained why." (Ian laughs) "I do praise her a lot
for her intelligence, "her sense of humor, et cetera. "They say that she's beautiful, "and I need to call her
beautiful so she knows it. "So I said bluntly that no, "if we're being honest, she's ugly. "And kids will let her know she's ugly. "So bringing up beauty
will only make her see it "as something worthy of
praise she doesn't have. "My sister started screaming at me "for calling her daughter ugly. "I know it can be a sensitive topic, "but she's a grown adult, "and I think she should
be able to handle honesty "on the subject. "She thinks I'm a huge asshole, "but I'm just trying to be realistic "and do what I think
is best for my niece." - Oh man. - I, 20, childless
would like to tell my... - He didn't say to her face, she's ugly. I thought at the beginning- - That's what I thought. - Yeah, but with those huge
(beep) ears, she heard it. (everyone laughs) - Goddamn. (everyone laughs) Okay, okay. - I think there's something kind of... Like, it's not that, like I don't think he has a point here. Like, I don't- - We do not under any
circumstances gotta hand it to him. (laughs) - No, no. But like, isn't that kind of weird for like the parents to be like, "You have to call her beautiful." Like, that's also like weird. But also, okay. Like, okay. - The conversation sounds like
it was weird from the get go. Yeah. - It's just so funny to
think of the parents like, "You have to call her beautiful." And he's like, "Yeah, but I
mean, you've seen her, right?" (everyone laughs) - Are we looking at the same person? - Like, walking into a
home improvement store, like ah, ah, and like
smashing every mirror. Like, "Right this way, sweetie. "Just walk on by, it's fine. "They didn't have 'em today." - She's never seen her reflection. I will say like beautiful is a very like all encompassing term. That means a lot of things. And this guy is thinking entirely looks. And it's like calling someone
beautiful is also like, you're a beautiful person,
you are a beautiful being. Okay, this guy, I do not
agree with him at all. What I will say that I do- - Here comes the but,
which is what they say when they see her face walking toward 'em. Am I right? Am I right? Goddamn. Got her. She got jacked. Let's go. - One of those eight-year-old bangers. - As someone who started in
the acting industry very young, and I've seen it with a lot of people, like there is a point of yes, like constantly making a kid like be like, yes, you're so pretty. Like, you're pretty. And having that be like
the primary adjective that you're giving to a kid of like you're worthy.
- Especially for women. - Yes. I will say like with
my nieces and nephews, now I don't have this situation, but like I try to use so
many different adjectives to be like, yeah, like your worth is more than your appearance. Like, but I grew up, you know,
being in the acting industry, your appearance was heavily pushed on you. And it was like, "Oh, you're gorgeous." - And you were reminded. - You got this, like you're gorgeous. And it's like, oh, so if I
don't have that, I'm screwed. And it is damaging. I do see that. But you are also, you can
call your niece beautiful. Like, this guy's, this is weird. - Because I've heard that
before too where like, you know, I'm not a parent, but
it's a matter of like, you know, complimenting everything. Like, you're so creative, you're so smart. Like, and that makes sense, and I understand you with
the acting aspect of like, I grew up and, you know, I
always struggled with my weight and if I ever lost any, it'd be like, "Oh, you're looking thin,
you're looking good." And I had really bad stomach
issues in my early 20s to the point where like
the same frame I am now, just so people are like aware
of reference, I'm like 194. I was 137 at my lowest. Very sick, not doing well,
looked like a skeleton. People would be like,
"You're looking great." And like, I hate that. But like the idea that he just couldn't
call his niece beautiful 'cause that's a lie, but he just wants to say everything else. Like, his heart is in the right
place for the other stuff. But he's just not following
through on that aspect. Like, and also telling
an eight-year-old like, "You're so smart." It's like, no, they're not. They can't even do long division yet. - Yeah. - I'm smart! So like it's a lie no matter what. - Yeah. (Ian laughs) Yeah. - Eight-year-olds are great. - Some comments here. "You're the asshole. "Everything you said
about it not being good "to put beauty on a pedestal "and act like that's
what's important is true. "You're right about the overall attitude, "but saying to her parents "that she's ugly is completely unnecessary "and incredibly rude asshole behavior." - Yeah.
- Yeah, yeah. - Yes, exactly. Someone else said, "You're right to wanna
compliment other things "to balance out the perception "that physical beauty is most important, "but why do the two need
to be mutually exclusive? "What benefit is there
to calling her ugly? "Why not, I don't know, "do what you can to
make her feel less ugly "while also highlighting all
her other great qualities? "And you're right that she'll
run into her fair share "of bullies in her life. "My heart breaks for
her that her own uncle "is her first one." - There we go. - [Shayne] Yeah, that's true. - It's based off of his
judgment that he's like, "Well, I know she's ugly." It's like she's eight. - Yeah, I feel like he's
like almost there, you know? Like, he's like almost there,
and he's just gotta just- - And I know a lot of
people from this industry that dealt with that too where
yes, teens and your peers when you're growing up
are gonna be awful to you, but there's nothing more devastating than your own authority figures backing that shit up.
- That sucks. - That makes you feel like
you have no support system, that no one in life. Like, you know, like I do think to agree like it's great to have
parents or authority figures in your life that you look up to who are like they believe in me and they see it even if I don't and the people around me don't. And that's huge to have, and
he's just not seeing that. So that's sad, but hopefully he'll learn. Here we go. Last story. "Today I (beep) up by
accidentally pantsing myself "on a first date." - Okay. - This is Mr. Bean. (everyone laughs) - I hope it had some like
cartoonish sound to it. - Yeah. Okay. So, "I, a 20-year-old
man, was preparing to go "on a first date with a girl,
19, that I met on Bumble. "I have not been on many dates
before and was quite nervous. "I also didn't have much
date appropriate clothing. "Procrastinating like usual, "I didn't start trying
things on until 30 minutes "before I was supposed to pick her up. "Freaking out and needing to
find anything presentable, "my roommate was kind enough
to lend me his nice khaki pants "and a flannel. "So I just threw on the pants
figuring it'd be good enough. "He's a bit bigger than me, "but I didn't realize how much bigger "until I was walking to her door. "I was damn near holding
my pants up with one hand "in the pocket but played it off "with the world's most awkward side hug, "afraid to take my hand out of my pocket. "Gravity was not my friend tonight. "Whole date was just sitting
down at dinner, great. "Pants can't hurt you
when you're sitting down. "She's really nice, and
we had a great time. "Everything changed when we
walked outta the restaurant "and drove back to her house. "We were saying goodbye at the door. "And gaining courage, I went
in for a full hug instead. "Immediate regret. "I tried to widen my stance, "but gravity is a heartless bitch. "I immediately felt a
cool breeze in my nethers "and my pants around my knees. "I tried to reach around still embracing "and pull them up to respectable levels, "but it was too late. "My face was beet red. "She looked down and saw my underwear. "She stepped back very concerned. "I tried to explain everything, "and she ended up just
laughing hysterically saying-" - That's great. - "All it takes to get
your pants off is one hug? "Apparently her sister
as well was watching "through the window and was
also laughing and confirmed I "at least didn't
intentionally de-pants myself. "Anyway, we're going on a second date, "and I'm getting a belt." - That's cute. - I think that's, I mean
that's a great first date. - That is a pretty good first date. - Like, I don't think it could
have gone better than that. - And his roommate was
like, "How'd it go?" (everyone laughs) "Yeah, did the pants come off?" - [Damien] I got you, bud. - [Shayne] I got you, dude. - I was afraid she was gonna think he like did it intentionally, and it was gonna be like scary. - Oh yeah, I thought for a second too. - But I mean that's great. - I'll also say like
that's a better outcome than like him successfully hugging her with like extremely wide stance. Like, 'cause that's at least a laugh. Like, if she walks away, and
he's just like this far spread, she's just like, "What are you doing?" - Also how sus would it be for
a guy to walk up like this? - Yeah. - Hey. (everyone laughs) - It literally sounds
like a cartoon situation of like two kids in a trench
coat, it's falling off. Just like, "Oh hey." - She's like, "Goodbye hug?" And he goes like this, he goes. (everyone laughs) - Yeah. - Oy! (everyone laughs) - Zangy. - Let's go. Bring it in. Some comments. "You're 20, never owned
a belt in your life, "and this is only the first
time this has happened to you?" He said, "Well, I buy pants that fit. "These weren't my pants." Okay, fine. Someone else said, "If you
end up dating for a while, "this will be something
funny for you to share. "It's all good." He responded, "Definitely
could have ended worse, "but she responded great,
which has made it much funnier. "Never living it down though." Super funny. This is young Mr. Bean. - I really wanted him to like
keep going on the description. He's like, "Her sister
was in the window watching "as was her elderly nun of a
grandmother and youth pastor "and a baby that just
happened to be there." - And a Christian couple who were upset 'cause they saw some
edibles fall outta my pants. - Meanwhile they had an ugly daughter. (everyone laughs) - Ugly niece. - Wow, this has been a rollercoaster of Reddit stories.
- It really has. - A lot of insane things. Well, I don't know if we
learned anything today, but, you know. - It made me feel good about myself to hear about all these
shitty people for sure. - Yeah, I think so. And I'm gonna try that
belt trick with somebody. I think that'll be like
fun comic relief, you know? - Oh no, I didn't have a belt. - I don't think if you're older than 20- - Planning for it? - I don't think anyone older than 20 you're gonna get away with it. Like, you drive a very nice car. You can't be like, "I don't have a belt." - But it is a way to
get out of a split bill. If it's like, "Can we split the bill?" And you stand up in your pants come off, they're not gonna believe
you can split the bill. - Yeah, be like, "I gotta go to bed." (everyone laughs) It's past my bed time. - Oh god. - My diaper's full. (everyone laughs) Sorry. - Thank you guys for being here. This has been a lot. We've been through a lot today. And thank you all for watching. You know how it is. Let us know if there's other subreddits
we should be looking at or other stories. You can go over to the Smosh
Reddit and send them there. Also, if you're ever watching these and you see your story on here, make an update and let
us know that you saw it. And hey, we'll read it here. - There's a camera behind here. - What? All right, we'll see you later. - I think it's okay. I think, honestly, I think it's okay. - All my friends think it's okay.
