The Hobbit: Theatrical Audiobook | Chapter 1 - An Unexpected Party (J.R.R. Tolkien)

The Hobbit by J.R.R. Tolkien chapter one an unexpected party in the hole in the ground there lived a hobbit not a nasty dirty wet hole filled with the ends of worms and an oozy smell no yet dry bare sandy hole with nothing in the test sit down on or to eat it was a hobbit hole and that means comfort it had a perfectly rounded dome like a portal painted green with shiny yellow brass knob in the exact middle the door opened onto a tube shaped hole like a tunnel a very comfortable tunnel without smoke with paneled walls and floors tiled and carpeted provided with polished chairs and lots and lots of pegs for hats and coats the hobbit was fond of visitors the tunnel wound on and on going fairly but not quite straight into the side of the hill the hill as all the people for many miles around called it and many little round doors opened out of it first from one side and been on another no going upstairs for the hobbits bedrooms bathrooms cellars pantries lots of these wardrobes he had whole rooms devoted to clothes kitchens dining rooms were all on the same floor and indeed on the same passage the best rooms were all on the left-hand side going in for fees were the only ones to have windows deep set round windows looking over his garden and meadows beyond sloping down to the river this Hobbit was a very well-to-do hobbit and his name was Baggins the Bagginses had lived in the neighbourhood of the hill for time out of mind and people considered them very respectable not only because most of them were rich but also because they never had any adventures who ordered anything unexpected you could tell what a Baggins would say on any question without the bother of asking him this is a story of how a Baggins had an adventure and found himself doing in saying things altogether unexpected he may have lost the neighbors respect but he gained well you will see whether you gained anything in the end the mother of our particular hobbit Oh what is a hobbit I suppose hobbits need some description nowadays since they have become rare and shy of the big people as they call us they are or were of little people about half our height and smaller than the bearded dwarves hobbits have no beers there is little or no magic about them except the ordinary everyday sort which helps them to disappear quietly and quickly when large stupid folk like you and me come blundering along making a noise like elephants which they can hear a mile off they are inclined to be fat in the stomach they dress in bright colours chiefly green and yellow where no shoes because their feet grow natural leathery soles and thick warm brown air like the stuff on their heads which is curly have long clever brown fingers good-natured faces and laughs deep fruity laughs especially after dinner which they had twice a day when they can get it now you know enough to go on with as I was saying the mother of this Hobbit of Bilbo Baggins lettuce was the famous belladonna took one of the three remarkable daughters of the old Souq head of the hobbits who lived across the water the small river that ran at the foot of the hill it was often said in other families that long ago one of the two ancestors must have taken a fairy wife that was of course absurd but certainly there was still something not entirely Hobbit right about them and once in a while members of the two clan would go and have adventures they discreetly disappeared and the family hushed it up but the fact remained that the tooks were not as respectable as the Bagginses though they were undoubtedly richer not that belladonna ever had any adventures after she became mrs. bunker Baggins Bunga thus was builders father built the most luxurious hobbit o for her and partly with her money that was to be found either under the hill or over the hill or across the water and there they remained to the end of their days still it is probable that builder our only son although he looked and behaved exactly like a second edition of his solid and comfortable father got something a bit queer in his make up from the tube side something that only waited for a chance to come out the chance never arrived until bilbo baggins was grown up being about fifty years old or so and living in the beautiful hobbit hole built by his father which I've just described for you until he had in fact apparently settled down in move ibly by some curious chance one morning long ago in the quiet of the world when there was less noise and more green and the hobbits were still numerous and prosperous and Bobo was standing at his door after breakfast smoking an enormous long wooden pipe that reached nearly down to his wooly toes neatly brushed Gandalf came by candle if you had heard only a quarter of what I've heard about him and I have heard only very little of all there is to hear you would be prepared for any sort of remarkable tale tales and adventures sprouted up all over the place wherever he went in the most extraordinary fashion he had not been down that way under the hill for ages and ages not since his friend the old Duke died in fact and the hobbits had almost forgotten what he looked like he had been away over the hill and across the water on businesses of his own since they were all small hobbits boys and Hobbit girls all that the unsuspecting Bilbo saw that morning was an old man with staff he had a tall pointed blue hat a long grey cloak a silver scarf over which his long white beard hung down below his waist and immense black boots good morning said Bilbo and he meant it the Sun was shining and the grass was very green but Gandalf looked at him from under long bushy eyebrows that stuck out further than the brim of his shady hat what do you mean he said do wish me a good morning or men that it is a good morning whether I want it or not or that you feel good this morning or that it is the morning to be good on all of them at once said builder and a very fine morning for a pipe of tobacco out of doors into the bargain if you have a pipe with you sit down and have a fill of fine there is no hurry we have all the day before us Ben Bilbo sat down on a seat by his door crossed his legs and blew out a beautiful gray ring of smoke that sailed up into the air without braking and floated away over the hill very pretty said Gandalf but I have no time to blow smoke rings this morning I am looking for someone to share in an adventure that I'm arranging and it's very difficult to find anyone why do you think so in these parts oh we are a plain quiet fokin have no use for adventures nasty disturbing uncomfortable things and make you late for dinner hmm fuck unthinking what anybody sees in them said our mr. Baggins and stuck one thumb behind his braces and blew out another even biggest smoke ring then he took out his morning letters and began to read pretending to take no more notice of the old man he had decided that he was not quite as sought and wanted him to go away but the old man did not move he stood leaning on his stick and gazing at the Hobbit without saying anything till Bober got quite uncomfortable and even the little cross good morning he said at last we don't want any adventures here thank you you might try over the hill or across the water by this he meant that the conversation was that meant what a lot of things you do use good morning for said Gandalf now he meant that you want to get rid of me and that it won't be good till I move off My dear sir um let me see I don't think I know your name yes yes my Jess and I do know your name mr. Bilbo Baggins and you do know my name though you don't remember I belong to it hi I'm Gandalf and canned huff means me to think I should have left to be good morning to by belladonna tooks son as if i were selling buttons of the door can tell that fishes may not the wandering wizard that gave up took a pair of magic diamond studs that fastened themselves and never came undone until ordered not the fellow who used to tell such wonderful tales at parties about dragons and governance and Giants in the rescue of princesses and the unexpected luck of widows sons not the man that used to make such particularly excellent fireworks I remember those Oh took used to have them on Midsummer's Eve splendid they used to go up like great lilies and snapdragons and laburnums of fire and hang in the Twilight all evening you will notice already that mr. Baggins was not quite so Pro Z as he liked to believe also that he was very fond of flowers dear me he went on not the Gandalf who was responsible for so many quite lads and lasses going off into the blue for mad adventures anything from climbing trees to visiting elves sailing in ships sailing to other Shores bless me I used to be quite interested I mean you used to upset things badly in these parts once upon a time I beg your pardon but I had no idea you were still in business where else should I be said the wizard all the same I'm pleased to find you remember something about me you seem to remember my fireworks kindly at any rate and that is not without hope indeed for your old grandfather Trucks sake and for the sake of poor belladonna I will give you what you asked for I beg your pardon I mean I'll spare anything else you have twice now my pardon I give it to you in fact I will go so far as to send you on this adventure very amusing for me very good for you and profitable two very likely if you ever get over it sorry I don't want any adventures thank you not today good morning but please come to tea anytime you like oh why here why not tomorrow come tomorrow good goodbye with that the hobbits turned and scuttled inside his round green door and shut it as quickly as he dared not to seem rude wizards after all our wizards what earth did ask him to t4 he said to himself as he went to the pantry he had only just had breakfast but he thought a cake or two and a drink of something would do him good after his fright Gandalf in the meanwhile was still standing outside his door and laughing long but quietly after a while he stepped up and with the spike on his staff scratched a queer sign on the hobbits beautiful green front door then he strode away just about the time when Bilbo was finishing his second cake and beginning to think that he had escaped Adventures very well the next day he had almost forgotten about Gandalf he did not remember things very well unless he put them down on his engagement tablet like this Gandalf tea Wednesday yesterday he had been too flustered to do anything of the kind just before teatime there came a tremendous ring on the front doorbell and then he remembered he rushed and put on the kettle and put out another cup and saucer and an extra cake or two and ran to the door I am so sorry to keep you waiting he was going to say when he saw that it was not Gandalf at all it was a dwarf with a blue beard tucked into a golden belt and very bright eyes under his dark green hood as soon as the door was opened he pushed inside just as if he had been expected he hung his hooded cloak on the nearest peg and Dwalin Archer service he said with a low bow Bilbo Baggins that yours said The Hobbit too surprised to ask any questions for the moment when the silence that followed had become uncomfortable he added I am just about to take tea pray come and have some with me a little stiff perhaps but he meant it kindly under what would you do if an uninvited dwarf came and hung his things up in your hall without a word of explanation they had not been a table long in fact they had hardly reached the third cake when they came another even louder ring at the Bell excuse me said the hobbit and off he went to the door so you've got to hear it last that was what he was going to say to gandalf this time but it was not gandalf instead there was a very odd-looking dwarf on the step with a white beard and a scarlet hood and he too hopped inside as soon as the door was open just as if he had been invited I see they have begun to arrive already he said when he caught sight of dwellings green hood hanging up he hung his red one next to it and Balin at your service he said with his hand on his breast thank you said BOGO with a gasp it was not the correct thing to say but they have begun to arrive had flustered him badly he liked visitors but he liked to know them before they arrived and he prefer to ask them himself he had a horrible thought that the cakes might run short and then he as the host he knew his duty and stuck to it however painful he might have to go without come along in and have some tea he managed to say after taking a deep breath our little beer would suit me better if it is all the same to you my good sir said Balin with the white beard but I don't mind some cake a seed cake if you have any Oh Lots Bilbo found himself answering to his own surprise and he found himself struggling off to to the cellar to fill a pint beer mug and then to a pantry to fetch two beautiful round seed cakes which he had baked that afternoon for his after supper morsel when he got back Balin and Dwalin were talking at the table like old friends as a matter of fact they were brothers I still tell you Bilbo plumped down the beer and the cake in front of them when loud came a ring at the Bell again and then another ring Gandalf for certain this time he thought as he puffed along the passage but it was not it was two more dwarves both with blue hoods silver belts and yellow beards and each of them carried a bag of tools and a spade in they hopped as soon as the door began to open Kobo was hardly surprised at all what can I do for you my dwarves he said clearly at your service said the one and Frehley added the other and they both swept off their blue hoods and bowed yours and your families replied belper remembering his manners this time Dwalin and Balin here already I see said Kili let us join the throng throng thought mr. Baggins I don't like the sound of that I really must sit down for a minute didn't collect my wits and have a drink he had only just had a sip in the corner while the four dwarves sat around the table and talked about mines and golds and troubles with goblins and the depredations of dragons and lots of other things which he did not understand and did not want him for they sounded much too adventurous when ding dong Ling Lang his bell rang again as if some naughty little hobbit boy was trying to pull the handle off someone at the door he said blinking some for I should say by the sound said fili besides we saw them coming along behind us in the distance the poor little Hobbit sat down in the hall and put his head in his hands and wondered what has happened and what was going to happen and whether they would all stay to supper then the bell rang again louder than ever and he had to run to the door it was not for after all it was 5 another dwarf had come along while he was wandering in the hall he had hardly turned the knob before they were all inside bowing and saying at your service one after another Dori nori Ori Owen and glowin were their names and very soon the two purple hoods a grey hood a brown hood and a white hood were hanging on the pegs and off they marched with their broad hands stuck in that gold and silver belts to join the others already it had almost become a throng some called for ale and some for Porter and one for coffee and all of them for cake so the hobbits was kept very busy for a while a big jug of coffee had just been set in the heart the seed cakes were gone and the dwarfs was starting on a round of buttered scones when there came a loud knock not a ring but a hard rat-tat on the hobbits beautiful green door somebody was banging with a stick Bilbo rushed along the passage very angry and altogether bewildered and beloved this was the most Awkward Wednesday he ever remembered he pulled open the door with a jerk and they all fell in one on top of the other more Dwarfs for more and there was Gandalf behind leaning on his staff and laughing he had made quite a dent on the beautiful door he had also by the way knocked out the secret mark that he had put there the morning before he said it is not like you Bilbo to keep friends waiting on the mat and then open the door like a popgun let me introduce b'fer Bofur Bombur and especially Thorin at your service at your service so Josephus said biffer Bofur and bomba standing in a row then they hung up to yellow hoods and a pale green one and also a sky-blue one with a long silver tassel this last belonged to Thorin an enormous Lea important dwarf in fact no other than the great Thorin Oakenshield himself who was not at all pleased at falling flat on Bilbo's mat with biffer Bofur and Bombur on top of him for one thing Bombo was immensely fat and heavy Thorin indeed was very haughty and said nothing about service but poor mr. Baggins said he was sorry so many times that had last he grunted Oh pray don't mention it and stopped frowning ah now we're all here said Gandalf looking at the row of thirteen hoods the best detachable party hoods and his own hats hanging on the pegs quite merry gathering I hope there is something left for the late comers to eat and drink what's that tea no thank you a little nothing for me unfamiliar and raspberry jam and Apple topped said biffer and mince pies and chase said Bopha under pork pie and solid said Bombay and more cakes and coffee if you don't mind called the other Dwarfs through the door put all of your eggs there's a good fellow Gandalf called after him as the hobbits stumped off to the pantries and just bring out the cold chicken and pick holes seems to know as much about the inside of Mylar disease to do herself thought mr. Baggins who was feeling positively flummoxed and was beginning to wonder whether a most wretched adventure had not come right into his house by the time he had got all the bottles and dishes and knives and forks and glasses and plates and spoons and things piled up on big trays he was getting very hot and red in the face and annoyed confussed a gated that bothered these dwarves he said aloud why don't they come and lend a hand lo and behold there stood Balin and Dwalin at the door of the kitchen and fili and Kili behind us and before he could say knife they had a whisk the trays and a couple of small tables into the parlors and set out everything afresh gandalf sat at the head of the party with the thirteenth wharves all round and Bilbo sat on a stool at the fireside nibbling at a biscuit his appetite was quite taken away and trying to look as if this was all perfectly ordinary and not in the least an adventure the dwarves ate and ate and talked and talked and time got off at last they pushed their chairs back and over made a move to collect the plates and glasses I suppose you will all stay to supper he said in his Politis on pressing tales of course said Thorin and after we shall get through the business so late and we must have some music first now to clear up there upon the twelve doors not Thorin he was too important to the state talking to Gandalf jumped to their feet and made tall piles of old things off they went not waited for trays balancing columns of plates each with a bottle on top on while the only started to sing the wine on every door and of course they did none of these dreadful things and everything was cleaned and put away safest quickest lightning while the Hobbit was turning round and round in the middle of the kitchen trying to see what they were doing then they went back and found Thorin with his feet on the fenders smoking a pipe he was blowing the most enormous smoke rings and wherever he told one to go it went up the chimney or behind the clock on the mantelpiece or under the table all round and round the ceiling but wherever it went it was not quick enough to escape Gandalf pop he sent a smaller smoke ring from his short clay pipe straight through each one of thorns then Gandalf smoke ring would go green and come back to hover over the Wizards head he had a cloud of them about him already and in the dim light it made him look strange and sorceress Bilbo stood still and watched he loved smoke rings and then he blushed to think how proud he had been yesterday morning of the smoke rings he had sent up the wind over the hill love for some music said Thorin bring out the instruments Kili and Phoebe rushed for their bags and brought back little fiddles Dori nori and Dori brought out flutes from somewhere inside their coats bomba produced a drum from the hall vivir and Bofur went out too and came back with clarinets that they had left among the walking sticks Dwalin and Balin said excuse me I left mine in the porch just bring mine and with you said Thorin they came back with violas as big as themselves and with Thorens harp wrapped in the green cloth it was a beautiful golden harp and when Thorin struck it the music began all at once so sudden and sweet that Dober forgot everything else and who swept away into dark lands under strange moons far over the water and very far from his hobbit Oh under the hill the dark came into the room from the little window that opened in the side of the hill the firelight flickered it was April and still they played on while the shadow of Gandalf speared Waggett against the wall the dark filled all the room and the fire died down and the shadows were lost and still they played on and suddenly first one and then another began to sing as they played deep throated singing of the dwarves in the deep places of their ancient homes and this is like a fragments of their song far over the Misty Mountains cold too James D uncovers old we passed away in a break of day to seek the chanted go the Wars of your made my tea smell Wow like ringing in places deep where dog things they're nice love raishin skein under visual me Golden Bowl they shaped and rolled and light they call to hide in jazz on hills of so on Silva cause as they strong the flowering star Songkran say huh the dragon fire in twisted why they matched the light of Moon and Sun far over the Misty Mountains cold to dungeons D I'm caverns old we must away ere break of day to claim all for God's and gold God let's take on the for them soft oh well no matters the lathe a long and many a song was sung goodbye the pines were lorry ha Hey was it's blaze right trees like so raised with love the bells were ringing in the day man looked with faces the dragons are more fierce and far lay low that ties and houses frame the mountain so beneath um but we'll say the drop of dew they flared the hole to dying for then these his feet beneath the MU far over the Misty Mountains grim to dungeons deep and caverns day we must away they'll break of day - when our hearts and go from as they sang the hobbits felt the love of beautiful things made by hands and by cunning and by magic moving through him a fierce and jealous love the desire of the hearts of dwarves then something to Koosh woke up inside him and he wished to go and see the great mountains and hear the pine trees and the waterfalls and explore the caves and wear a sword instead of a walking stick he looked out of the window the stars were out in the dark sky above the trees he thought of the jewels of the dwarfs shining in dark caverns suddenly in the wood beyond the water a flame lapped up probably someone lighting a wood fire and he thought of plundering dragons settling on his quiet Hill and kindling it all to flames he shuddered and very quickly he was plain mr. Baggins of Bag End Underhill again he got up trembling he had less than half a mind to fetch the lamp and more than half a mind to pretend to and go and hide behind the beer barrels in the cellar and not come out again until all the dwarves had gone away suddenly he found that the music and the singing had stopped and they were all looking at him with eyes shining in the dark where are you going said Thorin in a tone that seemed to show that he guessed both halves of the hobbits mind what about a little light said Bilbo apologetically we like the dark said all the dwarves dark for dark business there are many hours before dawn of course said builder and sat down in a hurry he missed the stool and sat in the fender knocking over the poker and harsh said Gandalf not foreign speak and this is how Thorin began gandalf dwarves and mr. Baggins we are met together in the house of our friend and fellow conspirator this most excellent and audacious hobbits may the hare honest O's never fall out all praise to his wine and ale he paused for breath and for a polite remark from The Hobbit but the compliments were quite lost on poor Bilbo Baggins who was wagging his mouth in protest at being called audacious and worst of all fellow conspirator though no noise came out he was so flummoxed so Thorin went on we are much to discuss our plans our ways means policy and devices we shall soon before the break of day start on our long journey a journey from which some of us or perhaps all of us except our friend and counselor the ingenious wizard Gandalf may never return it is a solemn moment our object is I take it well known to us all to the estimable mr. Baggins and perhaps to one or two of the younger Dwarfs I think I should be right in naming Kili and fili for instance the exact situation at the moment may require a little brief explanation this was Thorin's style he was an important dwarf if he had been allowed he would probably have gone on like this until he was out of breath without telling anyone there anything that was not known already but he was rudely interrupted who Bilbo couldn't bear it any longer at may never return he began to feel a shriek coming up inside and very soon at first out like the whistle of an engine coming out of all the dogs sprang up knocking over the table gandalf struck a blue light on the end of his magic staff and in its firework of glare the poor little hobbit could be seen kneeling on the hearth rug shaking like a jelly bird was melting then he fell flat on the floor and kept on calling out over and over again and that was all they could get out of him for a long time so they took him and laid him out of the way on the drawing-room sofa with a drink at his elbow and they went back to their dark business horrible little fella said Gandalf as they sat down again it's funny queer fits but is one of the best man one of the best as fierce as a dragon in a pinch if you have ever seen a dragon in a pinch you will realize that this was only poetical exaggeration applied to any hobbits even to old tux great grand uncle bull-roarer who was so huge for a hobbit that he could ride a horse he charged the ranks of the goblins of Mount Graham in the Battle of the green fields and knocked that King golf in bull's head clean off with a wooden Club it sailed a hundred yards through the air and went down the rabbit hole and in this way the battle was won and the game of golf invented at the same moment in the meanwhile however bullroar is gently descendant was reviving in the drawing-room after a while and a drink he crept nervously to the door of the parlour this is what he heard gluon speaking will he do do you think it is all very well for Gandalf to talk about this Hobbit being fierce but won't shriek like wah in a moment of excitement would be enough to wake the dragon and all of his qualities and killed a lot of us I think it sounded more like frightened and excitement in fact if it had not been for the sign on the door I should have been shown we had come to the wrong house as soon as our clucked eyes on the little fellow bobbing and puffing on the back I had my doubts he looks more like a grocer than a burglar then mr. Baggins turned the handle and went in the chooks I'd had one he suddenly felt he would go without bed and breakfast to be thought fierce as for little fellow bobbing on the mat it almost made him really fierce many a time afterwards the Baggins part regretted what he did now and he said to himself Bilbo you were a fool you walked right in and put your foot in it pardon me he said if I have overheard words that you were saying I don't pretend to understand what you are talking about or your reference to burglars but I think I am right in believing this is what he called being honest dignity that you think I am no good I will show you I have those signs on my door it was painted a week ago and I'm quite sure you have come to the wrong house as soon as I saw your funny faces on the doorstep I had my doubts but treat it as the right one tell me what you want done and I will try it if I have to walk from here to the east of East to fight the great where worms in the last desert I had a great great great granduncle once bull-roarer tuck and yes yes but that was long ago said glowing I was talking about you and I assure you there is a mark on this door the usual one in the trade all used to be bargain wants a good job plenty of excitement and reasonable reward that's how it's usually read you can say expert treasure hunter in Valka if you like some of them do it's all the same to us Gandalf told us that there was a man of the sort in these parts looking for a job at once and that he had arranged for a meeting here nice when st teatime of course there is a Mark said Gandalf I put it there myself for very good reasons who asked me to find the 14th man for your expedition that I chose mr. Baggins just let anyone say I chose the wrong man or the wrong house and you can stop at 13 and have all the bad laugh you like go go back to digging coal he scowled so angrily at glowing that the dwarf huddled back in his chair and when Bilbo tried to open his mouth to ask a question he turned and frowned at him and stuck out his bushy eyebrows till bobba shut his mouth tight with a snap butts right said Gandalf let's have no more argument I have chosen mr. Baggins and that ought to be enough for all of you if I say here's a burglar a burglar here sore will though when the time comes there is a lot more in him the new gas and a great deal more than he has any idea of himself young man possibly all lived to thank me yet now Bilborough my boy first the lamp let's have a little light on this on the table in the light of a big lamp with the red shade he spread a piece of parchment rather like a map this was made by thrall your grandfather Thorin he said in answer to the dwarfs excited questions it was a plan of the mountain I don't see that this will help as much said Thorin disappointedly after a glance I remember the mountain well and the lands about us and I know one work with us and the withered Heath were the great dragons bred there is a dragon marked in red on the mountain said Balin but it will be easy enough to find him without that if we ever arrived there there is one point that you haven't noticed said the wizard and that is the secret entrance you see that rule on the west side and the hand pointing to it from the other rooms but marks a hidden passage to the lower halls it may have been secret once said thorn but how do we know that it is secret any longer old Smaug has lived there long enough now to find out anything there is to know about those caves he may but he can't have used it for years and years why because it is too small five feet higher the door and three may walk abreast say the rooms but Smaug could not creep into a hole that size not even when he was a young dragon certainly not after devouring so many of the dwarves and Men of Dale it seems like a great big hole to me squeaked bill burr who had no experience of dragons and Oly of Hobbit holes he was getting excited and interested again so that he forgot to keep his mouth shut he loved maps and in his Hall there hung a large one of the country round with all his favorite walks marked on it in red ink how could such a large door be kept secret from everybody inside apart from the dragon he asked he was only a little Hobbit you must remember in lots of wires said Gandalf but in what way this one has been hidden we don't know without going to see from what it says on the map I should guess there is a closed door which has been made to look exactly like the side of the mountain that's the usual dwarves method I think that is right isn't it quite right said Thorin also went on Gandalf I forgot to mention that would the map went Keir a small and curious key here it is he said and handed you thorin a key with a long barrel and intricate words made of silver keep it safe indeed or we'll set Thorin and he fastened it upon a fine chain that hung about his neck and under his jacket now things began to look more hopeful this news alters them much for the better so far we have had no clear idea what to do we thought of going east as quiet and careful as we could as far as the long lake after that the trouble would begin a long time before that if I know anything about the roads East interrupted Gandalf we might go from bar up along the river running went on Thorin taking no notice and so to the ruins of Dale the old town in the valley there under the shadow of the mountain but we mana verse liked the idea of the front gate the river runs right out of it through the great cliff for the south of the mountain and out of it comes the dragon too far too often unless he has changed his habits that would be no good said the wizard but without a mighty warrior even a hero I tried to find one but warriors a busy fighting one another in distant lands and in this neighborhood heroes are scarce or simply not to be found swords in these parts are mostly blunt and axes are used for trees and shields as cradles or dish covers and Dragons are comfortably far off and therefore legendary but is why I settled on burglary especially when I remembered the existence of a site door and here is our little Bilbo Baggins the burglar the chosen and selected burglar so now let's get on and make some plans very well then said Thorin supposing the burglar experts gives us some ideas or suggestions he turned with mock politeness to builder the first I should like to know a bit more about things said he feeling all confused and a bit shaky inside but so far still too crucially determined to go on with things I mean about the gold and the dragon and all that and how it got there and who it belongs to and so on and further plus me said Thorin haven't you got a map or did you hear our song and haven't we been talking about all this for hours all the same I should like it all plain and clear said he obstinately on putting on his business manner usually reserved for people who tried to borrow money off him and doing his best to appear wise and prudent and professional and live up to Gandalf's recommendation also I should like to know about risks out-of-pocket expenses a time required and remuneration and so forth by which he meant what am I going to get out of it and am I going to come back alive oh very well Sante Thorin long ago in my grandfather thralls time our family was driven out of the far north and came back with all their wealth and their tools to this mountain on the map it had been discovered by my far ancestor drain the old but now they mined and they tunneled and they made huge halls and greater workshops and an addition I believe they found a good deal of gold and a great many jewels too anyway they grew immensely rich famous and my grandfather was king under the mountain again and treated with great reverence by the mortal men who lived to the south and were gradually spreading up the running river as far as the valley overshadowed by the mountain they built the Murray town of Dale there in those days Kings used to send for our Smiths and reward even the least skilful most richly father's would beg us to take their sons as apprentices and pay us handsomely especially in food supplies which we never bothered to grow or find for ourselves altogether those were good days for us and the poorest of us had money to spend and to lend and leisure to make beautiful things just for the fun of it not to speak of the most marvelous and magical toys the like of which is not to be found at the world now so my grandfather's halls became full of armor and jewels and carvings and cups and the toy market of Dale was the wonder of the north undoubtedly that was what brought the dragon dragons steal gold and jewels you know from men and elves and dwarves wherever they could find them and they guard that plunder as long as they live which is practically forever unless they are killed and never enjoy a brass ring of it indeed they hardly know a good bit of work from a bat though they usually have a good notion of the current market value well they can't make a thing for themselves not even mend a little loose scale of their armor there were lots of dragons in the North in those days the gold was probably getting scarce up there with the dwarves flying south or getting killed and all the general waste and destruction the dragons make going from bad to worse there was a most specially greedy strong and wicked worm called Smaug one day he flew up into the air and came South the first we heard of it was annoys like a hurricane coming and the pine trees on the mountain creaking and cracking in the wind some of the dwarfs who happened to be outside I was one ruffling a find adventurous lad in those days always wandering about and it saved my life that day well from a long way off we saw the driving to settle on our Mountain in a spout of flame then he came down the slopes when in which the worst they all went up and fire by that time all the bells were ringing it down and the Warriors were arming the dwarves rushed out of that great games that does the dragon waiting for none escaped that way the river rushed up and Stephen a fog fell one daily fuck the driving came on them and destroyed most of the Warriors the usual unhappy story it was only too common in those days then he went back and crept in through the front gate and routed out all the halls and lanes and tolls alleys cellars mansions and passages after that there were no doors left alive inside but he took all their wealth for himself probably for that is the drugs way he has piled it all up in a great heap far inside and sleeps on it for a bet later he used to crawl out of the great gate and come by night today and carry away people especially made its to eat until Dale was ruined and all the people dead or gone what goes on back now I don't know for certain but I don't suppose anyone lives nearer to the mountain than the far edge of the long lake nowadays the few of us that were well outside sat and wept in hiding and cursor smiled and there we were unexpectedly joined by my father and my grandfather which cinched beards they looked very grim but they said very little when I asked how they had got away they told me to hold my tongue and said that one day in the proper time I should know after that we went away but we have had to earn our living as best as we could up and down the lands often enough sinking as lowest blacksmith work or even coal mining but we have never forgotten our stolen treasure and even now when I will allow we have a good bit laid by and are not so badly off here Thorin stroked the gold chain around his neck we still mean to get it back and to bring our curses home to smoke if we can I have often wondered about my father's and my grandfather's escape I see now they must have had a private side door which only they knew about but apparently they made a map and I should like to know how Gandalf got hold vents and why did not come down to me the rightful heir I did not get hold of it I was given it said the wizard the old grandfather thrall was killed you remember and the mines of Moria by azog the Goblin curses name yes said Thorin and throne your father went away on the 21st of April a hundred years ago last Thursday and has never been seen by you since true true said Thorin well your father gave me this to give to you and if I have chosen my own time and way for handing it over you can hardly blame me considering the trouble I had to find you your father could not remember his own name when he gave me the paper and he never told me who so on the whole I think I ought to be President Thanks here it is said he handing the map to Thorin I don't understand Seto Thorin and bilborough's he would have liked to say the same the explanation did not seem to explain your grandfather said the wizard slowly and grimly gave the map to his son for safety before he went to the mines of Moria your father went away to try his luck with the map after your grandfather was killed and lots of adventures of a most unpleasant sort he had but he never got near the mountain how he got there I don't know but I found him a prisoner in the dungeons of the necromancer whatever were you talking that I was touring with a shudder and all the dwarves Shiv it never you mind I was finding things house as usual and announced a dangerous business it was even I Gandalf only just escaped I tried to save your father but it was too late he was witless and wandering and had forgotten almost everything except the map and the key we have long ago paid the goblins of Moria said Thorin we must give a thought to the necromancer owed absurd here's an enemy far beyond the powers of all the dwarves put together if they could all be collected again from the four corners of the world the one thing your father wished was for his son to read the map and use the key the dragon and the mountain the more than big enough tasks for you hear hear said Bilbo and accidentally said it aloud hear what they all said turning suddenly toward him and he was so flustered that he answered hear what I have to say well I'll start they asked well I should say that you ought to go east and have a look round after all there is the side door and Dragons must sleep sometimes I suppose if you sit on the doorstep long enough I daresay you will think of something and well don't you know I think we've talked long enough for one night if you see what I mean what about Bedan and only starting all that I will give you a good breakfast before you go before we go I suppose you mean said Thorin on to you the burglar and isn't sitting on the doorstep your job not to mention getting inside the door but I agree about bed and breakfast I like six eggs with my ham when starting on a journey right not poached and Margie don't break em after all the others had ordered their breakfasts without so much as a please which annoyed Bill burr very much they all got up The Hobbit had to find room for them all and filled all his spare rooms and made beds on chairs and sofas before he got them all stowed and went to his own little bed very tired and not altogether happy one thing he did make his mind up about was not to bother to get up very early and cook everybody else's wretched breakfast the turkish nurse was wearing off and he was not now quite so sure that he was going on any journey in the morning as he lay in bed he could hear Thorin still humming to himself in the best bedroom next to him Mountains cold to dungeons we must Oh break of day to find a loan for korchenko Bilbo went to sleep with that innocence and it gave him very uncomfortable dreams it was long after the break of day when he will come you

Channel: Bluefax

Views: 444,370

Rating: 4.8982315 out of 5

Keywords: hobbit, audiobook, tolkien, audio, book, lotr, drama, bilbo, baggins, gandalf, thorin, oakenshield, howard shore, peter jackson, lord of the rings, new, 2019, an, unexpected, party, desolation, smaug, battle, five, armies, audible, AUJ, BOFA, DOS, FOTR, TTT, ROTK, Phil, dragash, journey, adventure, fantasy, JRR, martin, freeman, richard, armitage, spoken, voiceover, silmarillion, rob, inglis, official, amazing, producer, fellowship, ring, return, king, towers, the hobbit, impressions, impersonation, andy, serkis, andyserkis, hobbitathon

Id: VAdeB-vtwgM

Length: 56min 25sec (3385 seconds)

Published: Sat Jun 22 2019