The Diren Kartal Show #27 LUCY LORD

today i've got lucy lord in the house or scan on lucy thanks for having me your voice is amazing stop it yes i swear it's such a light smoothie your voice man i can't even listen to it myself on these headphones i'm like turn it down and turn it down but how good how does it feel like i don't know with the headphones it makes me feel like it makes me feel important okay it's nice it's like you're going to recall some tunes in it you got any bars for me no you're like i've got chocolate bars yeah i can cook you protein bars but that is it okay so everyone that comes on right i'm not even a bother talking about lucy lord everyone knows who lucy lord is right but everyone that comes on um there is a question that i ask is a very important one i don't think we've even been there together yet no we haven't nando's what's your nando's order double chicken wrap yeah with halloween medium what about chips uh yeah if that i'll usually have that but if i'm having a sit down like a bigger one i'll have a quarter chicken medium macho peas no prayer chips pear purchased garlic bread sometimes my next question that i ask everyone right tell me about yourself i'm joking i've listened to all of your podcasts there's no second question so on the way here like i was talking about people that like talk about on their podcast and some of the some of the things that they say is like so yes please please tell me about yourself and i was like you you've listened to me say that that's why i'm kind of here on this podcast no you know and it's like not that it's annoying but it's like i know you don't like talking about yourself do you no no not at all not at all not at all should i talk about you yeah that'd be that'd be easier that'd be easier i'll just do the podcast on my own all right okay so let's talk about when we first met yeah it was four years ago now three years ago was it four years ago oh you know i can't keep up with no three three years ago at james's uh he was having a party it was like an 80s themed party was it was it his birthday do you know i actually no you know what it was it was his 100k facebook party that's what it was that's what it was yeah and that was because on he on his facebook he went he exploded on facebook really rapidly in it um and um i remember thinking rod he's he wants like an old school 80s pot and i'm thinking [ __ ] you know man these white boys from sorry what am i going to wear like i can't be i can't beat that let's all wear bum bags and bright colors yeah but at that point i'm not gonna lie i didn't even wear budgie smugglers no you didn't no and smith introduced me to them blue shorts i'd already met you as in like i knew who you were i'd seen you on videos because because james would come back like an excited kid from school and be like so doing this and doing that and doing this show all the videos that were going on the academy oh six um and so when i met you i was like i already know you oh wicked and i came kind of went up i was like darren hi how did you want to drink and you just kind of looked at me like who is this no you know what it is yeah i remember when i met like you i knew who you were as well but i didn't know like you in depth there's no videos of me yeah yeah yeah because there's there's always been that thing like oh so he's lord and i know everyone guesses everyone's like so is does lord like james or james like lord and like after like you meet after i met you it's like oh my god that'd be like asking if i fancy my sister you know what i mean yeah and it's so weird right yeah do people still ask you that [ __ ] um not not not really not as much no not as much maybe i don't know not really hashtag hashtag not my birds yeah exactly no not really but you said but maybe they don't want to ask because they kind of think oh it's obviously like a top secret private thing it's like no really no no really it's not like that lord lord's one of the boys i hope you don't get it what um what did you think what did you think of me you said i was quiet you were quiet but i'm quite quiet like i'm very that introvert i'm quite shy i'm not someone to go up to someone and be like hi how are you but at this party when i saw you i was like i've seen videos of you i know that you're this loud personality i know you know you're like a hype man and so i came in and i was like i didn't know anyone but i recognized yeah yeah and i was like oh great someone's going like someone's safe to go and speak to you tyrion how are you mate do you want a drink i don't really drink yeah so not me but you know what i've always like i've always been one of those people like you know when you first meet a group of people i only knew james yeah i didn't know anything about uh joshie mayhew was there willets was there no idea who they were no matter who they were i didn't know um sean siddall that he was living with at the time i think i didn't know them and i'm always like before i act billy big bollocks in any sort of environment i like to stay low-key you're watching the room i watch in the room and i feel like you know that element of respect like you don't just walk into someone's house and swing your dick around do you know what i mean i certainly don't know you don't not that we know of anyway but like you just don't do that so i've always like you know what i'm just going to say low-key until these people like kind of get me a bit more then i can act a little bit more comfortable because i think going into that circle of people was it was very different to me like you guys are complete opposite to people that have been raised around you know and did you were you were you friends with smith for a long time yeah i've i've met him at uni so what like 10 11 maybe 12 years ago but we i knew of him and you know we just run in the same circles it was like a very small universe like a sporting university yeah um so we knew each other to like you know be on a night out with kind of thing um but i wouldn't go and meet him for coffee you know we weren't like we were facebook friends but not friends friends so it was after we left uni that you just kind of um yeah we just became like twitter friends then you just tweet banter back and forth and then i was working a little bit down where he lived in maidenhead yeah and so sometimes i'd be like you're right like i'm going to pop in and say hi oh he's working at the gym down there and then australia had like australia was on the cards for us both and you just kind of become friends you know what i think it's mad about australia like how many people have you met other than me are from london that have moved to australia other than you other than me from london like a london boy no yeah you haven't or maybe yeah and always i always find that like say you guys are from outside of london you always know people from back home when you're in australia and i'm like i've got no one here from back home i didn't know anyone when i moved out dude no james hasn't moved out then no i didn't know anyone i moved over with one of my good friends from school yeah but as soon as we we went traveling first then as soon as we got to sydney i was like i want to live by the beach she wanted to live in the city so we just went our own ways but i didn't know anyone before i'd never been to australia i didn't know anyone where did you go traveling uh went to japan first unbelievable yeah yeah what was it what was about japan that was like it's just beautiful and so diverse like we went flew into tokyo but then we went out to where like mount fuji is climbed that did you yeah what was that like insane like insanely difficult as well is this like when you um when you went from because i know when you left you were like when you left you were in cheltenham yeah and you were ready to leave oh yeah i was yeah i was like counting down the clock can't wait and then you know as soon as you like go on a flight and then you landed it was the first place japan you landed yeah so i was in so i'm not from cheltenham but i'd lived i moved there after uni and then had been there about three years kind of left come back and i was like i'm like i need to go yeah and i think because i was brought up kind of moving around quite a lot yeah it's something that's quite natural just dad's job so they're in scotland now but they're not there he's an oil so we lived like around the middle east oman mashallah and then moved to scotland when like kind of school age okay and then i went down to england for uni which was like unheard of because everyone kind of stays in their own little yeah you know lives with their parents and yeah that kind of stuff whereas i was the only one to kind of really leave scotland and go back down to england so i moved to cheltenham shortly after university yeah and then after about three years i was like honey i've got a gp i need to go yeah and so we i went back home to scotland for a month yeah packed up all my [ __ ] sold on my [ __ ] on ebay like i had no money was in like loads of credit cards it's funny like when you're talking about it like you get so excited i can see you i remember i remember it what was that feeling like when you decided you were like okay i'm i'm flying i'm going what was that feeling like do you know what there was actually a super quick it was like five-month turnaround really because you know like you see on instagram now there's so many people who are like pack your bag quit your job catch a flight like with what with what what cash what are you talking about yeah it doesn't happen or i don't know many people i don't know anyone where that's happened they've literally dropped bags gone on a flight the next day yeah i'm sure it happens but everyone who i know there's been a plan there yeah and so like five mo yeah there was a five month turnaround it sounds a bit more sexy when you say you just left in it yeah it sounds yeah exactly it's instagramable isn't it it's like double tap i love you living on the edge i'm doing i'm doing it tomorrow i'm leaving great you're buy a ticket go to bali it's like really did that really happen no well didn't happen for me yeah and i don't know anyone whether it's happened i'm sure it has to some people but i don't know anyone who's just next day quit their [ __ ] moved yeah to be fair when i left australia when i left sydney to go bali when me and smith left it was um it was actually quite a bit of a process although we smoked bombed i don't know if you noticed but me and him got like free flights and we kept delaying flights and changing because there was that element of doubt yeah i remember it like yesterday it was fair yeah i remember it like yesterday it's weird didn't it was emotions like you saw us go through that yeah weird little stage in it but um when you so you went back to you went back to scotland yeah from up and then when mexico just just to literally just pack up like my parents are there so i was like what did your parents think of all this oh do you know what i think because they they when they were like 20 early 20s super early 20s got married typical like you know moved i think they moved to brunei not old school no not at all brunei's like i don't even know like was that was that you acted like like malaysia okay malaysia before i was in scotland no because they were because they so young kind of packed up and moved yeah yeah that was unheard of back in the day yeah i think now you kind of got it from blizzard yeah they just like do whatever you want do whatever you want that's cool what's the worst case scenario you can always come home i wonder what would be like with our kids if like would you be like that i reckon i'd be like get out of my house really yeah really yeah i don't know what i'd be like you know i reckon there'll be an element of me like keeping them there a little bit but that's selfish myself yeah because then you're maybe preventing them if they want to like you know how everyone says um you know everyone should go traveling everywhere i think no they shouldn't you know what that's interesting okay carry on what were you gonna say not because i've never heard that really and now when you said that it's made everyone should go traveling everyone i'm like no they [ __ ] shouldn't because not everybody wants to and like i know people who are really happy yeah at home just stay there their entire lives happy as [ __ ] they don't want to you know go like it's not being on holiday it sounds so sexy it's not going on holiday for three months and visiting all these amazing places you know it's that's not what like traveling true traveling is like hostels hostile jumping that kind of [ __ ] like one bag 20 kilograms and i think if you imagine how busy like changu is bali now yeah imagine if everybody went traveling and half the people who are in changu now don't even want to be there because they're complaining the toilet seats are like this the food is like this the roads like this yeah it's like don't come then that's funny because like i've always said like everyone should travel right experience it it helps you grow you see different places you learn all these different cultures and all that stuff but you're saying maybe it's not for everyone it's not for everyone no it's not for everyone and i think that's what like that attracts like-minded people so all of my friendship group that i can think of especially over in australia are all people who travel who enjoy that who it's like do you want to go to um i mean bali is like a cliche thing to do but you want to go to sri lanka for two weeks pack your bag let's go yeah you know but i couldn't say that to to some of my friends who've just certain people you can say that exactly right and you can't go around saying that to your mate that's married married with kids and he's like you know what i'm a homebody i read like my best mate steph hates being away from cheltenham she's not uh let's go on holiday for a month let's kind of see what happens really she loves going back to chat worse yeah it's mad she loves it whereas i'm like i just yeah after a while i just want to go somewhere else to be free yeah or like i'm happy as anything yeah in a hostel yeah 20 people that i don't know and just you know just in my bed do my own thing yeah where some people like their home comforts like to go to bed you know they're in bed they're like the normality of things staying the same i think um there's a big difference between traveling and going on holiday yeah right and i think i always said i traveled until i actually traveled yeah because you realize you're like if you're going away for two weeks that's not traveling that's not champagne that's a holiday you're going to stay in shitty hostels and you then i think that's when you'll really decide like i don't think traveling exactly that's it and you walk you're literally doing like you're walking around the entire day you don't know where you're going you don't speak the language you're this you're that like it's exhausting traveling proper traveling is exhausting it's hard to also get a routine yeah yeah you're completely out of your own comfort zone yeah but i i quite enjoy that it's not a holiday you don't sit in your ass and read a book yeah and it's weird because i feel like to kind of accomplish anything you do need that element of routine yeah and although like when we go away or whatever it sparks different things in your brain to maybe get it but no like where i've been with you there's been nowhere that you don't get up early you see your laptop like those kind of fundamentals are still the same that's true yeah you know you manage to keep your routine no matter where you are yeah i enjoy it man yeah i'll get up i'm like i'm so [ __ ] excited to over you have a business to run i'm like this is so exciting yeah what's the challenge today yeah what's what's going down today is everyone doing what they're supposed to be doing who hates me who likes me it's fun yeah but i think that one of the problems with social media now is that people look at other people instagraming a sunset in bali and being like that's travelling and they just drop they just quit their job yesterday got on this flight and flew to bali that's traveling they don't know that they're really like the crisis yeah like they you don't see all the struggles and all the pain and all that everything that comes with you know getting there and that that's why i think that some people just oh i want to be happy i want to be free i'll go to thailand i'll go to bali wherever it is then you get there and it's like [ __ ] it's not supposed to be like this i still don't like myself this is false advertising i didn't see this on their instagram page exactly right you're in a room crying on your own or like the ghillie um have you been to the islands uh no i went to la yeah okay i didn't go to gilead you need to go it's amazing but it's beautiful but there's these sweets here yeah magic mushrooms everyone um and everyone sits on this swing and takes this picture but if you actually go there there's a massive cube to get to this swing yeah and you're like this is so [ __ ] fake yeah like this isn't me sat and sat in a swing like yeah pedaling away as if i'm you know the only person on the island it's like no this is a this is a full-on tourist attraction this isn't real this isn't happening this is not real yeah but like okay so when you went from you went to japan so we went to japan uh yeah i went to japan for i think two weeks and you were 24 25 yeah 24 25 and then went to thailand but didn't do the usual like full moon parties and i think because i'd already done like i went to uni um when i was 17 so i was a year early oh so i missed all of just like no not because i'm smarter but because like the scottish english system is different okay so i was in a different year for my age yeah so i went to uni i missed freshers i missed all that fun kind of let's get pissed and meet each other kind of thing um and so when i think because i been to uni i'd had like four or five years under my belt in the work scenario i think traveling to me was different it wasn't let's go do [ __ ] loads of magic mushrooms and gilly island and let's go to you know the full moon parties and all that stuff i just was not interested in that do you think do you think you know when we like take off when we're traveling yeah do you think we're like escaping something so i think i think that's definitely my that was the reason that i left initially yeah but then everywhere you go there you are yeah have you heard of that so everywhere you go there why you always drop these mad little you you just drop something powerful and you blow my mind away again but it's true isn't it no it's true so you if you're fed up in your life yeah you can go to um indonesia but then after two weeks you're still fed up in your own life you still have to deal with those problems exactly so it's like you're trying to run from yourself which i think was definitely a reason why i left initially yeah we've all done that but exactly but now it's like i want to travel to you know to see the countries and want to learn more about myself it's something like fun it's exciting now whereas before it was like holy [ __ ] i'm so i hate my life yeah so much i need to get out of this where can i go yeah and the problem now is that everyone looks at other people thinking they're happier than me they're in australia they're in sydney sydney is a [ __ ] lonely place you don't know anyone yet yeah especially like um i think when i was there at winter when i i've done like two winters in australia yeah i hated it so much i hated it so much i was like it's thought it's people i swear it's colder than the uk in winter yeah people like oh it's sunny none of the houses are built for they're not they don't have double glazing they don't have a radiator they don't have all this [ __ ] you're in bed with a tracksuit on it yeah i remember being in in bed with joggers on socks tucked in hat on hoodie on in bed i woke up in the morning in sydney in winter i could see my own breath and i was like [ __ ] this nobody tells you about that [ __ ] no one tells you nobody yeah and so you see everyone down in bondi having fun and all that stuff but that's not real life like sydney is incredible it's amazing but if you're not happy within yourself it doesn't matter where you are you're not going to be it's also a bit clicky yeah a bit clicky yeah well everywhere kind of is you know everywhere yeah you're right i think that it's very easy to stay in that comfort zone of your friends where like people you grew up with but i think that happens a lot in australia and then when you try like as a brit like to break into that i think it's a little bit harder and it's harder to because it's harder to relate and i think that's why when we travel on like so when i met you straight away we have something in common like we're both from the uk we're both traveling oh best friends yeah you know i mean you've got a friend in common and all of a sudden your friends become kind of family there yeah because we have no one else do you know what i mean so it's kind of weird but kind of great and i feel like that's where you create these crazy friendships when you are like traveling but then i think the best thing about it is that you can then be in another part of the world and you bump into so many people oh that's the coolest isn't it yeah that's the best part about it is that you're never just in your little bubble just doing your own yeah you know we were waiting to come in here and you see two of your mates outside yeah walking outside hey what is a small small world and there's six degrees of separation with everyone that you kind of meet you know there's there's always some kind of common connection a common link yeah 100 so you went from and then you went you did the thailand so we did thailand but we went north to time so we went like we did some jungle um went to some jungle i can't remember what it's called because the pea then went to chiang mai then went to pai then did the long boat over to lao vietnam kuala lumpur bali and then moved to sydney i went to thailand but i did it for james shaw's um yeah yeah yeah yeah you didn't yeah yeah you weren't you weren't i don't think i've did pissing in the hall like i was not oh i don't know no way no you weren't in a three dollar hostel no we were in a five-star hotel i'm not gonna lie yeah this time it was good yeah i'm still pissed i saw the pictures it was mad yeah it's crazy that was unreal we were at the wedding the wedding was fun the wedding was in like beautiful what's the best wedding i've been to those weddings down in berry yeah and i'm usually haunted by weddings but that one i really enjoyed that one are really amazing food so you hit all those places when you went to australia when you left home right yeah did you um was there in your head you were like i'm not coming back for a while or was it i know i'm just going to go off take off a little bit did you know when you stepped into oz did you know that you will stay there for a bit did you have like did you apply for a year working with a bizarre or what yeah so you apply i applied for my working visa in my head i was like you know what i'm just gonna go there for a year yeah i'm gonna i'm gonna go there and see how i like it there was no expectations like i didn't know if i'd hate it and come back i didn't know if i'd go to new zealand i didn't know where i would go yeah so i was like i'm just gonna it was complete freedom you know it was going to this country where no one knows anything about you such a good feeling you know yeah there's no you could be a brand new friend you can be whatever the [ __ ] you want right it's empowering it is it is and but i've always said i was like sydney i can't imagine myself forever in sydney it's good for now but it's not forever and i think that one of the best things about australia in general is that it's so hard to get into especially now well yeah even before covered is so hard to get into and it's so hard to stay yes that it makes it special because you know that it's not going to be there forever yeah and i also often kind of would think to myself like if i had pr i don't have permanent residency assistantship but i think to myself if i had pr would i still be in sydney well that's me yeah exactly that's me it's like i've got pr yeah i wouldn't i don't know but there's something so good keeping like keeping you there because you know that yeah time limit on it it's amazing it's like i love australia until like 4 p.m and then i feel kind of lonely like get everything done you go for a walk you go for a swim you can go for dinner it's kind of like london like and even between cheltenham and um aberdeen in scotland i lived in birmingham for about a year by myself did not meet one person like not yeah i moved there for work and um what was the work uh pharmaceutical sales so what i do now yeah so a lot of people don't know actually you're a drug dealer drug dealer for the four-legged variety so for animals i do veterinary pharmaceutical sales and that's all i've really done out of uni so i moved from scotland to birmingham but i was there for a year by myself and i think if i'd have made an active um effort to i'd have gone up to people said hi if i'd have joined gyms and all that [ __ ] maybe i would have eventually kind of forged some kind of friendship but i'm not i'd i you know i wouldn't say boo to a goose i'm shy i don't go up to people and just start chatting away you know i'm getting better at it now you are here yeah like and i think that that's for me what travelling brings to you yes you know that's kind of have to you have to and that's what sydney sydney's a very very like we said sydney's a lonely place if you don't know anybody you could spend your whole day walking the beach doing the coastals going to manly sitting down in like you know overpriced coffee shops paying for 20 avocado and toast but you're still by yourself yeah and i think what's funny about that is there's so many people like that yeah and it's like and that's why they hate it yeah you're right you're right in birmingham did you enjoy that time on your own or not were there times where you like you know what [ __ ] out no no and i think that's the first time that i realized that i was really happy in like just my own little you know in my own little company that's when i kind of realized like oh i'm a bit of an introvert like i don't you know i don't need to be out of big groups of people to feel recharged like i'm pretty happy just bumbling about by myself which is why you do which i don't know how you do i don't know i don't know if i could never do it it'd be a real challenge doing a silent retreat silent retreats yeah tell me about that so i'd heard about them yeah uh through like yoga i'd heard about these silent retreats and oh you know i'd heard about people who'd done silent retreats and i thought that sounds [ __ ] awful i'm into it like that sounds really difficult to anyone that's me but like that bit's easy the not talking to people is easy but the no external stimulation the no work to keep you busy the no you know the no cafes the no uh you're kind of cussing what's it like where are you like i mean this was in a beautiful place in bali like at the foot of mount betour so kind of in the middle of nowhere you're in all these rice paddy fields where's your phone you have it but there's no signal but like for me i made a conscious effort of i'm going to experience this i'm turning my phone off i'm turning my laptop off i'm all of this um but i'm sure i can't why would you go to a silent tree and be on your phone like that you know i can't imagine people would go and do that but hey guys i'm on a silent retreat i'm exactly yeah whereas like i'd still i'd take pictures and stuff like that but you know my phone's on aeroplane mode i'm not how many people were there 20 max maybe 20 people do you talk to them no nothing do you just like stare at them well some people will like give you eye contact and give you kind of like a smile with your eyes but there's other people who just are uh they're not being rude like i remember being like that guy's really rude and it's like but he's not because he's there for that reason he's there for that reason he's in his own solitude place them hippie vibes them hippie vibes yeah but i think there's a difference between like me being in birmingham just not speaking to anyone because i don't have any friends there and you know putting yourself in a situation where there's no external stimulation there's no work to do there's no busyness hey lord how's life yeah i'm just having a silent retreat in birmingham yeah there's no distractions you know there's nothing to keep you away from yourself and outside your own mind but what i the reason i went there is because what i found with me is this pattern of things that i think that sounds like absolute [ __ ] tends to be the things that change my life really yeah can you mean examples yoga okay meditation uh sleeping with my phone out my room all of that [ __ ] i kind of roll my eyes and that sounds like absolute bollocks silent retreat like why the [ __ ] would you do that yeah but i think there's this thing when there's when you're there is an aversion to something for me now i'm like why become curious yeah i'm much like people there's not there's not many people or i can't think of anyone off the top of my head who i'm like i do not like that person but you know when you're in a big group of people there's someone here just like there's just something funny about them yeah i i get that weird energy but that to me is a mirror it's like why why is it is it because they're confident is it because they're you know secure like what is it about them yeah that makes me get my back up and think oh and i think it happens a lot with with girls and females is that you know you you're kind of judging each other and you're like oh well she's you know she's confident and she's outspoken you know i don't like her but it's like no it's it's because you're not confident and not spoken it's because you're you know maybe a bit insecure you care about what other people think that kind of thing so now like outside of the people um example when there's things that people say to me you know if you do this you should try to do that you should try going for a cold swim in the morning yeah that sounds [ __ ] awful yeah let's do it yeah yeah you know is when like because girls can get [ __ ] in it yeah and boys can as well as well boys can as well but i feel like with boys it usually ends up in a scrap yeah and it's kind of done with and it's like raw okay we just scrapped it out it's kind of stupid you kind of shake hands and walk away but i feel like with girls sometimes the beachiness goes on for so long and there's no there's no limit to like it just keeps going and going i've personally never heard you [ __ ] about a girl which is actually a [ __ ] amazing quality yeah i think i think stereotypically especially with um i think stereotypically and in movies you see like mean girls yeah that's how you see it played out girls chatting [ __ ] about other girls and you see it in school you see it in everything and i think it it people who are happy within themselves do not chat [ __ ] about other people you know you don't have to all like the same thing you don't have to all yeah you know my best mate is it's probably the complete opposite to me that the people who i think are closest to me steph you james are the complete opposite to me yeah you know but i don't chat [ __ ] about them yeah do you know so i think that stereotypically yeah probably women have been made out to be this [ __ ] they've got to be like that and i think that why don't we try and change that why don't women help empower women what would your response be if you found out someone was bitching about you hard what would your response be as a woman to a woman i know what my response what do you mean so if i found out that if someone was talking [ __ ] about me yeah you or me if no so if someone if i found out someone was talking [ __ ] about me and it's someone in my circle yeah someone i see oh bro what's your [ __ ] problem what's going on what would your response be so if i heard that you'd been saying [ __ ] about me my my feeling would be hurt i would be hurt okay but my my reaction wouldn't be to ask me this it wouldn't be to say [ __ ] back about you okay it'd be like yeah it'd be like yeah i would ask a sad person no i would be i would ask you but then but then it would be i think then it would be cut okay you know like you i wouldn't hang around if i knew my close mates were chatting [ __ ] about me i wouldn't i wouldn't keep them as close friends but i think sometimes like you know when you like confront someone about it i think they get this awakening because i don't think enough people get confronted about their actions which is a problem and i think people think they can get away with it doesn't have to be confront when you're swinging for him but like confront be like bro what's going on you need to call someone out on their own [ __ ] yeah like if you were doing something like if we were walking here and you said some [ __ ] if you spoke derogatory derogatory to um anybody in the street what the [ __ ] are you doing yeah why are you doing it why are you doing that like you wouldn't do that to me yeah you wouldn't do that to why you you know why are you doing that did i say something but like see that if you said you say that to me and when people pull up their friends or other people about it that's kind of embarrassing for me and i get embarrassed or it's a mirror it makes you look at yourself and be like why did i do that and sometimes i think we just get in these you know kind of going back to the [ __ ] and you get in these motions of it's what everyone else is doing no one's pulling me up on it because it's like no sometimes you need to pull your friends up and yourself up and be like why am i doing that that's why that's why it's important when you have friends around you can't have yes people yeah i think that's so important you can't have if all if all of my friends kept saying yes to everything i said i'll be like [ __ ] you know these are not my friends the [ __ ] disagree with me [ __ ] what makes that's what makes a friendship the world so interesting is that everyone's different and that's why you know people kick off online about anything yeah but how [ __ ] boring would it be if we all agreed and we all wanted to sit there and have our cups of tea and be like yeah that's great yeah oh internet's just full of [ __ ] do you ever get do you ever i can't imagine anyone ever hating on you on instagram have you ever got any sort of trolls or anything like any weird inboxes can [ __ ] you like no one said that i'm sure but yeah like a few random ones or yeah a few random ones or like i've heard snidey comments are you anxious about it or anything it hurts but it doesn't like affect you it doesn't make me change the way that i am if that makes sense like it's it hurts but at the same time i'm like i'm not going to waste my energy in right back because would it have changed you if you were younger like you're younger version would have changed the way you were would you have doubted yourself yeah because i would have a little yeah yeah if you're yeah i think definitely younger um and a bit more naive to the world yeah then yeah definitely you'd probably be like no i need to sort out if someone said to me like say if i was starting out yoga or in the gym and someone told me like she don't know what the [ __ ] she's doing that would be me like 10 years ago i would like right i'm never stepping foot in that [ __ ] again whereas now i'm like yeah but i'm trying you know show me how to do different then but who who knows no one knows what the [ __ ] they're doing yeah exactly and that i think that is the as soon as you understand that no one knows what they're doing and yeah i think as soon as you understand that you kind of take away the secret to life it's like no one knows what the [ __ ] we're all just trying our best with what we have we walked it from victoria yeah to soho and i've got a few words written down but i don't know what the [ __ ] i'm doing with this podcast i'm just [ __ ] talking like whatever whatever comes out and i feel like so many but if it was like if it was regimented if it was you know okay tell me about yourself tell me about this and tell me about how unnatural would that be unnatural weird yeah you're not gonna get the best out of it no do you know what i mean and i kind of like you know with podcasts sometimes it's like an awkward bit and i'm like not leave it i don't want to edit it out i think that's not it's normal that's what that's what you want to happen yeah do you know me and that's like you know when i see you do videos on instagram and whatever that's you like i know that's you you're not putting you know loads of like filters on you're not editing things you're not taking several different versions of it and seeing which one the best one you want to portray is yeah yeah you know it's just it's real yeah i think but you know what's mad though when i first started doing them like there was that judgment of my closer friends at the time from the uk and stuff being like dude what the [ __ ] you doing sort of thing and like in my head i was like [ __ ] do i get affected by what these people think i don't just carry on and i think when you realize like you you just carry on and then it's weird it's when other people recognize you're doing something well then they recognize it yeah when i don't when really you'd think your best mates would be the one going lord you need to do this go go go that's what they should be like that's right yeah yeah that's what they should be like but unless you know any different it's you know people being like what are you doing mate yeah why are you doing that who do you think you are yeah but people who are happy with them themselves don't do that they don't do it no they don't pull the other person back they don't keep them low it's like one of the my one of my favorite feelings is seeing my friends do well yeah that for me is like top tier top tier feeling it gets me excited you're excited yeah you get inspired yeah exactly how amazing is it to um help other people you know step up their game and play a bigger game do you know what people don't know like the amount of times i've had people say to me hey darren why are you opening james's show why don't you have your own one why don't you open it i'm like i [ __ ] i love the fact that my mates got a tour and i'm like a part of that why are you trying to bring me down by saying why are you opening the show and it's not your show exactly i'll have my show one day i'm gonna have my show one day but at the minute i'm enjoying helping my mate out and i'm having a good time and i'm learning from it and i'm doing this from it and whereas like if you have that mindset or if you have that ego think we nev we would never grow or we never excel in any way and i think some people they like you said that what's that saying you said with the cat pulling the yeah pulling the um the cat's tail yeah it's like they don't realize they're doing that they're trying to do that to me it's all in the same it's it's as if everyone's on the same level and as soon as you start to see like a threat or someone do better than you you want to you like there's people who want to pull them back into life and be like no stay down here which is like um i'm trying to think of an example now but if i if i decided right this is the direction that i want to now pursue if you know you were to turn around to me and be like well you know why do you think you can do that yeah that would be you trying to keep me in line you wouldn't do that but that's like an example of but they say you know the comments saying you are the f you are the um the sum of the five people that you surround yourself with is that tim ferriss i have no idea who that came from yeah but you're right yeah it is but it's so true and so you kind of think when you look around your circle you're like what are they all doing are they you know hustling are they pursuing things have they got passion what are they doing yeah and if they're not then you're not you know you feed off other people's energy enough other people doing things and i think that's one of the most amazing things about friendship is being able to bounce off each other and grow yeah it's the best i just learn from people the most like when i'm having this conversation i think it's the best you can't do it by yourself you can't anyone that says yeah and listen to this [ __ ] clearly is i'm self-made [ __ ] you ain't self-made you got it from somewhere even if it's not someone giving you a step up but it's someone who you are trying to prove wrong they still helped you you know it's sure what you want to do it's a [ __ ] yeah even if it's not someone being like oh here me i know someone i'll put you in contact i'll help you out even if someone turning around and being like you can't [ __ ] do that yeah they're helping you because you can't do anything on your own if you want to make big things happen if you want to be somewhere big you can't do on your own it's impossible i think it gets probably lonelier the higher you get 100 because not everyone's playing on that level yeah that's right and then you become a bit selfish yeah you have to i think you need to be yeah you need to manage your i think one of the things i've learned in one of the things that comes to life in lockdown is you need to be able to manage your own time and your own energy yeah because if you're sat all day scrolling your phone you're not doing and you're not achieving anything you're wasting it you need to be selfish with your own energy and with your time and with your time yeah time energy time is energy yeah and you need and it's staying up until one two o'clock in the morning every day yeah you're [ __ ] you can't get up and sit in your laptop at prep no for you know two three hours and one and one currency the most valuable is probably time because we can't get it back you can't get it back and nobody knows when it's gonna end yeah [ __ ] you now nobody knows when it's going to end so we could all be dead tomorrow and i know people say that as in like a passing yeah it's like life's short life short yeah but it is and what are you doing about it i know i'm like what do you want to achieve i'm 28 now on like you know we were saying the other day um how you like look how much has changed we've only known each other three years yeah look how much has changed in three years yeah or even from six months ago yeah but because we see each other because you see yourself every single day you don't start to see you don't see the change it's like if you're losing weight for example you look in your mirror every single day you don't see it yeah you don't see it it's that toilet roll effect i think sohi lee speaks about yeah about the layers yeah about taking one piece off each day and then it slowly slowly over time goes down yeah but i see that but you don't see it yourself yeah and i see that i see that with you i see that with all my friends i mean [ __ ] you now you've got a book coming out i do yeah tell me about that it's mad isn't it that's [ __ ] crazy yeah you're doing recipes yep so it was probably an idea that came around about eight it kind of was an idea that was put to me about 18 months ago yeah and my initial thought was like wow you know who would who would buy a book from me who wouldn't that's my initial thought it's like i love to cook i love to you know make food fun again yeah but you know like who would he would do that yeah and then as the kind of um months went past and grew and i started building like a website started putting recipes i was like do you know what i don't know what the [ __ ] i'm doing yeah but i'm just gonna try i'm gonna see if there's any traction there but that was interesting but there was interest on like on instagram i'd be like making a banana bread for example yeah and then i'd get a few people message me can i get that i've never baked before by the way but not the banana bread is unreal thank you they'd say like can i get this recipe so i used to write it all out screenshot it send it to them and then i thought you know this is easier if i just put it on a highlight yeah her instagram then got the highlights it's like i'll put it on a highlight and then i was like [ __ ] it would be easier if i put it on a web page and then the web page began to grow and then i was like it would be easier if i put this within the pages of a book and so that's when i thought oh maybe there is something i think it's going to blow up yeah i'm honestly i'm just this week i'm down in london because this week we've been shooting for it and how's that been when it's been about you oh obviously i'm awkward as [ __ ] you know i love it i wish i was there to see when they say i'm awkward about it yeah hi guys um yeah we're on lucy lords shoot and i'm like i would love to see your face oh it would be bright red yeah yeah yeah i love that though but you deserve it you deserve it you know you deserve it and i think a lot of people like they need to be told that because sometimes not enough people but there's there's there's being told that but there's believing it yourself and there's saying it's like you know whether you think you can or you think you can't you're right yeah so if i sit here and i'm like i can't bring that i can't do that yeah you know i'm right no like there's no self-belief there whereas if you think you know what i'm gonna aim [ __ ] high and i'm gonna you know that's where i'm gonna go it's like looking at the bigger picture than looking at the small kind of menu details of yeah you know did it put you outside your comfort zone yeah but you're still you're still working right i'm still working for you and then you're doing that as well in sydney in the uk so your time yeah so what time were you up this morning uh this morning it was just before four o'clock in the morning doing calls to australia doing yeah joining videos selling drugs video meetings all that kind of stuff and i think that's when i became to realize tight like my time my energy is so precious because i get up just before three o'clock i'm six hours working in australia it's like it's high-pressure job at sales you know and i think with visas well if i lose my job i lose my visa i can't get back in the country it's not just you know oh you can pick up another one babe it's like no you can't and there's a time limit on it yeah you know you can't just it's funny because people don't if i if i didn't bring that up about you getting up really early like people don't see that no i know do you know what something i really respect is who people who do not post about it every single people who don't post about the um the hard work not so much about the hard work but about the this [ __ ] yeah yeah yeah you know people who don't post about the the when they're feeling really [ __ ] yeah yeah yeah you know and i think it's important that we bring light to that but no one needs my bosses don't need to see that i'm up at three in the morning you know they see that with the results yeah they see that with you know the outcome with the outcome with how much you know money you make them at the end of the day you know the massive corporate organization so that's what they see but the um so i'd work full-time and then the problem with time energy would be like i'd finish at nine ten o'clock in the morning sweet but then i'm writing a book and then let's put aside you're doing this during covid yeah so you're going out to to the shops going out to supermarket to buy flour for example yep queuing for an hour [ __ ] to get in do you realize there's no flour on aisle six anymore so now i need to go to another supermarket to queue for 45 minutes to do exactly the same to do exactly you know to come back and then at the same time you're like i need to do this now because i can't be allowed out more than once exactly and then it's four p.m and i'm like i've got to go to [ __ ] bed in four hours and i need to make six recipes and then you've got your mate texting you inside being like large you're back i haven't seen your ages you know do you wanna pubs have just opened you want to go out for a drink i'm like i can't you can't i can't you don't want to say no but you have to you have to and the good friends respect that you know i've probably seen my best mate i can count on two hands i've been back five months now i came back for a five week holiday and i've been you know i was kind of stuck i've been here for five months now you've been working hard i've been working hard yeah yeah this has probably been the most difficult year i think but with like is it done now sorry i'm pouring water guys right um it's done in terms of i've done the recipes but because i'm such a perfectionist with stuff i'm like but can i try the recipes three or four times and the girl who i was telling this this week and the girl turned around to me she was like you do know that most people don't even try it once like most people who we've shot with don't even try it once you would you didn't want to drop any names there they did no i'm not going to drop any names no i can assume but she was like most people don't write it themselves yeah and they don't it's like that's just their face it's like you know like a musician yeah it's that you grow up thinking like i don't know who can i use they all write the lyrics and stuff they write the lyrics they write all the beats to it they you know they drove themselves to the o2 stadium know it's like it yeah it's completely different i know recently found out comedians actually write material down yeah when i had someone on my podcast okay heard a comedian i was like oh [ __ ] i was like i thought stand up was just like you guys just stand up and you go like raw how did they do that assumptions but they actually write material and they they learn the jokes yeah they know it they know it inside out [ __ ] that and so for me like going to the shoot this week i was so i mean i had complete confidence in the recipes because i wasn't um making them for the photo shoot they had this whole team of people picking plates to choose what you know this dish will look best on someone makes it but i had so much relief for myself because i was like i can look at that recipe and know that i've made it 16 times over at 1 o'clock in the morning when i'm getting up in two hours time and i've shopped about six different shops to try and get that [ __ ] cinnamon or whatever it is like and you know it's that kind of um i know that hard work lord and i'm gonna buy it don't worry i'm gonna buy the book i'm gonna buy five but this week they were taking pictures of it and it's literally like somebody put their hand into my brain pulled out my exactly how i envisage it yeah and create it yeah it was crazy i felt like i was on cloud nine you know i'm sleep deprived this is by far the hardest year in terms of struggle yeah like i've just you know trying to [ __ ] keep my job trying to get your job because you can't fly back i can't fly back exactly and i think when you work in australia for a big court like i work in with the largest pharmaceutical company in the world they know that they have you yeah by the balls yeah okay because if you don't provide them results you're out you're out you'll find someone else and then you can't get back into australia oh you can't get your visa yeah you know they're not they're not they don't just hand them out it's very very [ __ ] difficult yeah so i think a lot of the pressure is pressure that i put on myself to you know outperform like if you look at sales wise my last six months of sales have been the highest they've ever been in the last four years yes lord but you know what pressure's like you know like with muscle and i say this to my clients i'm like you put pressure and intensity onto your muscles it tears those little muscle fibers up and you grow stronger ones and then you're used to that sort of pressure and i feel like that with whatever you're doing is that's that pressure you've grown into that and now you're a better salesperson or whatever it is and now when you do have another period like this it's probably not going to be as hard because you're like i did it already yeah but it's i think it's it's that we mentioned about half an hour ago that you know being out of your comfort zone do you enjoy that no i [ __ ] hate it i hate it but i know that that's where the the i know that's where the the juice comes from yeah you know it's like making orange juice you put pressure and that's when you get the juice that's when you get what you want yeah and so i know if something makes me feel really uncomfortable yeah i think i should probably try that yoga meditation you know go for a swim first thing in the morning yeah i don't like getting up at three o'clock i've never liked getting up first thing in the morning but i know that's where my best work is that's where the magic is that's what exactly that's where the good stuff comes from so whenever someone says something like you should try this yeah and if i might if my automatic you should try this silent retreat yeah if my automatic thought is [ __ ] that there's another half of me that's like try it yeah dare you why not yeah i mean what is it about what is it about food that like because the thing is you have this like you have this like aura about you right and in australia when i need like help packing or whatever or i need i just need help i'm like lord we don't you free do you want to come around and you're like yes let me come around i'll help you pack i'll bring some banana bread and what it is and i'm like yes i [ __ ] love this my ex-girlfriend got jealousy you know no i didn't know that yeah my ex-girlfriend got jealous of you she asked me like do you think she's pretty i'm like yeah she's fit what do you want me to [ __ ] say and because all the boys love you i think there's an element of fret sometimes sometimes with some i get some insecure girls but like you like to give and i think and and that's the thing is that when it's you or james like the stuff i would do for you i would do for any of my good mates yeah like will it i'm like mate when you go to the airport i can take you in and in my head i'm like i can take him in we can meet for a coffee this time maybe i can like really have lunch on the flight maybe packing something that's how i think with everyone but i think especially with you why is that though like with the food and stuff online um i just like to make sure other people are looked after yeah i think i don't know what it is it's like a nurturing side it's yeah i really like seeing other people comfortable and doing well and if i can help with anything yeah then that makes that in turn makes me feel good yeah yeah you know and it's it's my kind of um you know we were saying earlier you have to be selfish yeah i am [ __ ] at being selfish i will put myself at the bottom of the pile every single time like every single time but the way that i've had to re um put it in a different perspective in my mind is the better that i am as a person in terms of you know the things that i need like i'm a [ __ ] plan you know the sleep the light the movement the this the that whatever i need the better i am then for you the more i can turn up for you yes you know like when we met yesterday i was on one hour sleep yeah i've been staying in a [ __ ] hole so you guys are listening i was a message lord i'm like where you staying she's like hacked me i said yeah hackney okay i don't have me well we're in hackney hackney central i said you're staying in hackney central i don't know where i am do you i said are you walking around hackney central you're tight little lululemon pants i said in the hood i said call me if you need anything i said i don't know if you know hackney very well and where you're staying is like a little bit it's not the best the places sort of thing so i had to go in there drag her out take her to wandsworth yeah so i was put there because or um that's where a friend suggested because it's right next where the photo shoot was no problem at all but i'm staying in this place and i'm like i don't feel very safe yeah but at the same time i'm like is that just you know i'm chilling i'm [ __ ] safe it's like i'm like is that just me being a right little brat like i won't say anything so i'll just be here but i was like i don't think i've slept well all week and if we had for example this podcast today yeah yesterday i was on one hour's sleep i was [ __ ] first thing i said to you like lord i haven't seen you in what five months i have nothing to bring so to bring it back the more that i look after myself the more that i focus on my sleep my you know eating good feeling good moving good the more i can then turn up for my friends yeah and so that's the way that i have to twist it in my head because if it was lord what's best for you i'm like i don't know i can't do you know i'm not very good at doing stuff that's good for me but if it's for other people absolutely but what i rate about you is that so much is you are more you are you're selfish with your time in a sense that you're like no no i need my morning walk i need i'm selfish with my alone time and i think that's something that i've had to get good at saying because if i'm around people all day yeah i'm like i'm [ __ ] like i'm i'm exhausted and i don't have any time to kind of recharge and i think that's what you know that's that's an introvert it's not that they're by themselves all the time in a room but you know it's it's that i need that time to just take a deep breath and just recharge and then i can come back and i can be around people i love people you know i love going out nights out that kind of stuff i love that but i need to have my i need to have my downtime and my recharge time i need to be like an iphone you know you plug it in you recharge it and then i'm good to go which is why you do yoga which is why so meditation yeah all of these practices that help me come back to myself within my body within my mind and it's just like a deep breath it's like i'm ready for it it's not because i i like yoga as a like i never look forward to going to yoga i never look forward to meditating ever but when you finish but when you finish amazing yeah but to me i don't do it like i don't go to um yoga for that 90-minute class or whatever it is i don't do it for that yeah i do it for the rest of the day effect that it has and then like um james clear and topic habit speaks the more you do those little things the more the bigger picture changes yeah it's true yeah it works yeah so i don't sit for i don't know 20 minutes whatever it is every day a good example of that that works yeah of course but i don't like sit for 20 minutes a day with my eyes closed and you know sit into my own brain because i like it i [ __ ] hate i can't think of a worse place to be than my own head i don't you know i don't want to know what's happening there i don't want to know yeah but it's i don't do it for those 20 minutes i do it for the 23 hours and 40 minutes that it gives me back in my day did you um like obviously that helps you with your mental health everything in general meditating yoga and all that stuff what about when we were in bali remember when we had to duck out and like how how good it is like duck out of what because there's been a few times we've just had to what for coving yeah how crazy was that yeah that was mad like me we had our smoke bomb within an hour smith's had to smoke one because australia's closing doors yeah i haven't seen him now for how long i don't know i might but next time i see him might be like 10 months it's been six months it's been six months it's the longest i haven't seen him legit it's the longest i haven't seen him and like are you gonna go back are you gonna try to go back yeah i'm trying my best to go back so at the moment because i'm not a citizen and i don't have pr you have to apply for exemption by the australian border force to get through and sydney's only letting 300 people in on a flight from around the world per day yeah so i've applied three times and they're just like nah nah nah no matter like yeah i've got this big ass company behind me being like we need her back like yesterday and australia bought it for just being like nah nah and you i'm part of all these facebook groups of people trying to get back and there's people who are like you know are doctors and nurses are citizens and you cannot get back yeah you have to apply for an exemption at the moment so i'm doing my best to get back yeah but when that will be i don't [ __ ] know and i want like i want to be back there i want to go back at the moment but this whole and that's why you know they everything works out the the book the cooking that that would not have worked out in any better way if you were there if i was there yeah then if this scenario had not happened so there's having that like blind faith in life you know [ __ ] is going to happen and there's this thing that the stoics say you've heard of this like stoics yeah yeah yeah you have the daily stones very like simple like simplistic mindset but there's this thing they do it's like um like a premeditation almost of waking up in the morning and being like [ __ ] is gonna happen today okay people are gonna be rude to me i'm going to be let down somebody's going to disappoint me something bad's going to happen and once you accept that is that what forgot to worry about for the rest of the day nothing yeah you know it's like if i'm driving from cheltenham to london which i don't have a car here but i'm like i'm going to hit traffic probably yeah you know someone's probably going to cut me up yeah you know that kind of stuff as soon as i accept that and get in my car then what what can happen that's not yeah so you know i think living life in in a way of [ __ ] is going to happen but how can i change that it's kind of saying like when you've got to accept some of your friends like the way they are so just accept it just crack on it's their life whatever who am i to say they shouldn't be exactly any different and i think there's something i heard where if you were born in if you were born in their footsteps yeah and you had lived their life you had their dna you wouldn't be doing any differently yeah well yeah you know like who are we to say that's right what's wrong or whatever to judge people like there is you know there's right things to do and there's wrong things to do um but if we were not in that situation how will we be doing any different yeah true i think that's a very good point to finish on yeah lucy lord hey that was sick thank you so much thank you for coming on and for you guys are listening where do we find you they know where to find you but you tell them um so all the usual kind of places so social media lord lucy yeah which sounds really pretentious but it's actually just my last name so it's actually quite unoriginal um and website again www.lordluci.com i've got a weekly friday newsletter where i send out a new recipe each week kind of like not a quote so much but like this is what i've heard this week that's made me think a little bit cool um yeah stuff like that every week and when the book is out make sure you [ __ ] buy it i think it'll be out in spring maybe like march time next year oh on my birthday wicked perfect okay guys thank you guys for listening make sure you subscribe to the channel tell all your friends yeah and go follow lucy lord peace and love thank you for listening take it easy

Channel: Diren Kartal

Views: 6,735

Rating: 4.9729729 out of 5

Keywords: podcast, health, lifestyle, traveling, international, bali, Australia, neatup247

Id: gi2G9s-S7bM

Length: 58min 18sec (3498 seconds)

Published: Sat Aug 29 2020