The best of Colin Mochrie

[Music] dreams fold down my job is to let them drown every day I wondered why and I cut down the lumber I shut my string [Music] I don't care [Music] rushing people reward [Music] you like to bring to slice my [Music] [Music] [Music] [Applause] my only wish [Music] [Applause] [Music] Miami the land the time remembered name is a city not to be confused with my Anna 1970s when I was in high school I belong to a a band called the happy funk band until an unfortunate typo caused us to be expelled from school but funk is still very close to my heart and it brings me great pleasure to introduce this great funk hits don't be sniffin their Columbia we're not known just for coffee Columbia I'll take animal genitalia audio clues scene is Ryan is Rhett Butler Colin is Scarlett O'Hara I hear I always you know that's how it goes in the relationship Brett finally tells scarlet Paisley Brett's not Italian right no skull it I'm afraid I'm going dead police well fiddle-dee-dee I don't care scarlet I know I've said a lot of things too why'd you stop chewing tobacco started I love you and if you run away with me but if you run away with me you look like two pigs wrestling under a blanket how would you like that Scarlett me and you wonder your blanket like pigs all right when you talk like that I I almost wouldn't go with you but I'll never forget the last fight we had when you looked at me and you shouted hey what smells that was started that letter was burning I smell something it was the pork roast you're my little pork roast person we're doing the pig analogies all the time sorry I've had a locket made up for you put something inside a little little verse that I want you to remember open it up I really do I'm wearing it fall that's what my face is like this gonna rest rest I'm wearing a thong - what - thongs don't make it right it's got it I love you but I'm not gonna beg you to go away at me huh just leave well don't leave before I tell you this I've been fighting it fighting it fighting it but I can't let my darling there's what you talkin about Willis I love violence I like to watch them every day even when they don't make sense I saw this one with a guy with a gun his cuts would never miss yeah they did hit you with the far you Dirty Harry Krishna llaves MC jackal McLean see they have escaped 20 ways to self control President Clinton [Applause] I'm a white Canadian I got a chance seen is Zorro played by Ryan catches up with the leader of the Mexican guard played by count go ahead what are you doing on my exercise machine you thought you could run away from me you can't run away from me I won't need a big sword for you you'll never take me alive Zorro I bet you're wondering what part of Mexico I'm from I was educated in Oxford you must come back with me you are committed many crimes badly I'm from the same neighborhood you will never take me sorrow I made a promise to the people of the village they said bring him back sorrow bring him back and I looked them all in the eyes and said he is Johnny I'd like to be change my name from Saul to Johnny but the Jay is so hard to carve in a wall it takes two motions rather than just a Z I'm sorry I was amused by your accent you will never take me I will say as my fathers and forefathers said before me when anyone tried to capture them my poodle stuck in a heater vent and the one tonight Putin is free he will joy your ankles down to the bone you would hide behind a dog like the dog you are hey hey I said take you back and as you hang from that rope I will look up to you and say let me be your love monkey but outside I've said too much I meant thing mixed signals here I wanna take you back but not for the villagers I want you to come live with me okay just that easy well if it's between hanging from the highest yardarm or living with a man with a nice hat than a mask you will come back tell me the words I want to hear are you sure yes now look at my eyes and tell me I will here are the words I tried to say to you ever since your first father's me on horseback seeing you naked changed my life you tolerate me you really really tolerate me [Applause]

Channel: catkatri

Views: 242,708

Rating: 4.819591 out of 5

Keywords: improv, whose, line, colin, mochrie

Id: kWqdUbLCkMc

Length: 10min 0sec (600 seconds)

Published: Tue Sep 23 2008