Grill: I’m telling you, he’s a vampire! Chill: Time traveler! Grill: Vampire! Chill: Time traveler! Grill: Vampi- Brew: What’s going on in here? Grill: Oh hey Brew. Uhh- Chill: We’re looking at pictures of Keanu Reeves through time as he travels to save the world. Grill: I think you mean he lives eternal now that he has been embraced into the crimson kindred. Hiss. Brew: Alright, alright, I get it. Let’s see these pictures. Howard? Howard: Displaying on Living Room TV. Brew: Huh. I can see it, but I don’t think this is exactly evidence of time traveling vampires or whatever you two are arguing over. Grill: Oh yeah? Well how about this? Howard! Play the Charlie Chaplin thing Brew: I don’t… What am I looking at? Grill: Howard, enhance! Howard: That’s not a thing. Grill: There! See it? She’s on a cellphone. Brew: Hmm… Well, it looks like she’s holding something for sure, but a cellphone? I’m not convinced. Chill: Oh oh, are we going to, ahem dodododoo dododododododo get to the bottom of this confusing chronological conundrum? Brew2: Haha! Nice alliteration. Grill: Wait, WHAT!? Brew: Today’s topic should be viewed as fun, not serious. Time travel doesn’t exist for people with modern day technology, and until future me appears we can assume that will remain true. And if you ever find yourself able to travel through time, please don’t meddle in the fabric of the timelines, the consequences could be disastrous. And with that out of the way… Let’s get into it. Brew2: I know what you’re thinking. Grill: How is this possible? Brew: Simple, because we’re animated. But more importantly, how common is this phenomena? Oh and just to make sure we’re both me, what’s your favourite type of cake? Brew2: Mocha banane latte. Brew: Alright, yeah checks out, that’s me. Brew2: Well, I’ve done the research in the next 24 hours, and the answer is, “common enough”. Brew: Huh, take it away, other me. Brew2: This picture which shows a Cornish beach scene from September 1943. At its center though is purported to be a man dressed as Mr. Bean looking at a cellphone. Another example comes in the form of this photograph from British Columbia, 1941 at the opening of the South Fork Bridge. In it is a man who looks rather hipster-y with his sunglasses, odd shirt, and small portable camera, which were uncommon at the time. Something similar to a 1995 Mike Tyson boxing match where it seems like an audience member is taking a video on their smartphone. And of course, the famous image of a woman supposedly holding a cellphone in behind the scenes footage from a Charlie Chaplin film. Grill: Oh yeah, well what about this picture of a British soldier doing a dab back in 1930? How do you explain that, coffee man? Brew: I knew dabs were timeless… Brew2: That one’s simple. Grill: How does a dance move from modern day appear almost a hundred years ago? Brew2: Well first off, it’s from four years ago. That’s a picture of extras from the movie Dunkirk, taken in 2016. Grill: Oh. Damn it. Brew: But, on that topic, when was the first video game made? Grill: Sonic 64, 1992. Brew: I don’t- no, that’s not- Chill: Oh, um um Wii Sports! Brew: Not even close! Grill: Ugh, I don’t know, something in 89 probably. The Atari? Brew: Do you just keep those in your pockets at all times? It’s still debated what the first video game was, though Tennis for Two is among the first. Played on an oscilloscope screen, the game was like many of the 2D tennis games that have come out since, released in... 1958. Grill: Wait, 58? Brew2: That’s right, but it’s not even the first. There are other video games that predate it. Brew: The point of this is that oftentimes, things are older than we think they are. Brew2: Much older. In the case of our chronologically confused hipster, while he may look like he’s flaunting the fashion and technology trends of the modern day, that is decidedly not the case. Let’s break down his appearance, piece by piece. Grill: Let’s start with that graphic tee, how do you explain that one, coffee man from the future? Brew2: Well, it’s a hockey jersey. Specifically for the Montreal Maroons, an NHL team that played between 1924 and 1938, a few years before the photo was taken. Grill: And what about the sunglasses then, wise guy? Brew: Sunglasses aren’t new. Here’s a question, when do you think aviators were a thing? Grill: 1980—right before Top Gun came out and made them even better. Brew: Try the 1920s! Designed to help pilots see despite the glare of the sun in the early days of aviation, the distinctive aviator style of sunglasses were marketed as early as the 1930s to the general public. Brew2: Seems like they really flew off the shelves. Brew: Hahahaha! Because aviators! Brew2: And they fly! Grill: And I thought one Brew was bad enough! Chill: But, what about the camera he’s holding? I thought old timey cameras were big! Brew: Well, the fact of the matter is, that camera is old timey. Brew2: Our mystery hipster is holding a Kodak 35, the first 35mm camera produced by Kodak, that was released in 1938, three whole years before the photo was taken. Brew: And here’s the thing, since everything that makes this fellow look like a time traveler is actually from that period, it may actually be harder to get them these days than when those things were new and available. Grill: Well you may have thoroughly debunked the fun of one mystery, but what about those chronologically-challenged cellphones? Huh? Brew: They’re not cellphones. Brew2: They’re cameras! The image in question from the Mike Tyson match, despite the modern appearance, seems to be a Casio QV-100 camera or Logitech Dycam camera. Grill: But, what about the Charlie Chaplin lady? Brew: Yeah, what about her, future me? Brew2: Well, here’s the thing, we’re making a lot of assumptions here about a video that isn’t in the highest resolution. The belief that she’s holding a cellphone seems to be because of the way her hand is placed to her head. And yes, if we look at this video again, we can see that there is a lady, and she’s holding her hand up to the side of her face and seemingly talking. But that could mean anything. Maybe she’s just shielding her face from the sun while talking to herself? Grill: Talking to herself? Who does that? Note to self… stop talking to self in front of double Brews.. Brew2: But, let’s assume that isn’t the case to make it more fun. What could she be holding up to her face? Brew: Oh, oh! May I? Brew2: I think you’ve got it figured out. Brew: How does “ear trumpet” sound to you? Grill: Dumb. It sounds dumb. Chill: Oh is it like a little tiny trumpet that plays in your ear? Brew: Not quite. As early as the 13th century, those with hearing problems have used items such as hollowed out horns in order to hear better, a trend which evolved in the 1700s to the “ear trumpet”, a little trumpet-like device that funneled sounds into the ear. Think of it like a fancier way of cupping a hand to your ear. Thanks to the development of the telephone, hearing aid technology also got a boost, and by 1913 the Siemens company had released a hearing aid that could sit in a purse, with a handset that was pressed against the user’s ear — held very much like a telephone. Given what little we can see of the woman, she does appear to be of the age where a hearing aid certainly wouldn’t be out of the realm of possibility. Besides, what kind of time traveler would go through the trouble of finding a period appropriate outfit, then whip out a cellphone that won’t be invented for another 80 years? Grill: Ok, ok, but what about that guy on the beach in the Mr. Bean suit from the 1940s? Brew2: Oh him? Yeah, that’s not a Mr. Bean suit, it’s just a normal suit. Which isn’t out of place at all, I wear my suit to the beach all the time. It keeps sand out. And more than likely? He’s either rolling up some tobacco, or just checking his pocket watch. Well, my job here is done. Grill: What, ruining fun? Brew2: Pretty much! Brew: While it can be fun to use our imagination, it’s important to think critically about things and remember that it can be comforting to fill in the blanks whenever something looks off. But until that fateful day that our future selves return to punish us for our naivete, it’s probably best to assume that the answer isn’t time travelers. Grill: Well how do you explain Keanu Reeves? Brew: Oh, he’s just breathtaking. Grill: And the other Brew? Brew: Well that’s just moooooovieeeeee maaaaaaaagic! Zoom back camera! That’s a Holy Mountain reference.
