- I guess the one that got away, ah, this is hard to talk about actually. I feel like (chuckles) I felt tethered to her in a way that I haven't with anyone before. It was very much like a
creative relationship. We built things together, we
came up with ideas together, we spent a lot of our
waking moments together. It was like my best friend. And so when we broke up,
it was really difficult. And I still think to some
capacity, I'm figuring it out. This was four years ago. - [Thoraya] Is there any part of you that kind of feels like
there's a chance there or do you feel like they
like completely got away? - Oh, they completely got away. I did the thing most men
do, which is sabotage things that we feel are unsalvageable, just because it's easier on the ego than to be vulnerable and I don't know, express
the things that you need. So I said some really nasty things and I don't think, I'm getting a little teary. - [Thoraya] You want me to stop? - I think it's the wind. No, no, you're fine,
you're absolutely fine. So if there's anything I
can say it's be vulnerable, just risk it, it's okay. It's scary, it hurts, but it's a lot easier to deal with, knowing that you said
exactly what you need to say as opposed to hiding behind false words or mean words to protect your own ego. It makes it a lot more easier
to live with, I think, yeah. - Well, so I came here
to New York on vacation and I met a guy and I fall
completely in love with him. He was an actor. And so we got like, a short story here, like how do you say (speaks
in foreign language) - Winter fling. - Yeah, like a winter fling story. And here in New York was snowing and I was like, I really
fell in love with him. But then we like, got to our country again and it was not meant to be, so But I don't know, that's all. - [Thoraya] Did you guys try at all? Did you try long distance? - No, no, no, but he
was from Argentina too, so like, we got back there to our country and like, there were our lives, like here was more (foreign language). - Here, they live like the fairytale. - Yeah, that thing. - But then when they got to Argentina, things like, didn't work out. He started like. - She was with me, she was
with me during the whole trip. (speaker speaks in foreign language) - But yeah, like here, they had like this whole fairytale, they started seeing the
each other every day and he was like, this
huge actor and musician and profess his love and stuff. And then they got there and she was like, super in love with him and he just started pulling away. And the magic of the story
is that like, she comes here every year, well, except for Covid, but she comes here every year and like, we walk in the
streets and everything and she's like, oh my
god, that's the Starbucks that I used to have
breakfast in when we slept. And then we woke up and
we are like, oh my god... - He got away, - He got away, but that's all. - But now I'm getting married
with someone else, so. It has a good ending. - Yeah, like this is like,
her bachelorette party and like, we're walking around the streets and remembering stuff. We've been talking about this guy for like, the whole time we've been here and it's very magical that you come here and ask the question. - [Thoraya] Imagine
the person you're marrying seeing this, should they feel
any type of way or like... - No, he knows the whole story. - [Thoraya] Oh he does. - He used to be my friend
so he knows everything. - [Thoraya] Okay, good, okay, good. - It's a good ending. - [Thoraya] It is a good
end, so you're very happy now? - Yes, I am. I am, yeah. - So I work at a summer camp and I've been going there
since I was a little kid and I've always heard
the stories of, you know, the couples that met at
camp, and now their children go to the camp and it's a whole fantasy. So I always knew that
that's what I wanted. And when I was 21, there was an international
counselor and he was so cute and right away, we hit it off and he was just a genuine, kind person. You know, he's walking around
all day with eight year olds. So that definitely helps. It was really fun to
learn about his history and his culture, where he came from and to kind of discover
each other in that way. And at camp in such like a raw form. At the end of the
summer, we were gonna try to figure things out, but I ended up just saying, you
know, I was moving to Europe for a bit, it didn't
make any sense at all. Long distance. He was willing to make something
work and I shut it off. I also was young, I was 21 and so I didn't know, you know, it's like, oh what if I meet someone else? And then I went from Europe to Australia and I was like, I'm
going all these places, meeting all these people. And you say that beforehand,
thinking you'll meet all these people that you'll
fall in love with, but no one ever like him. You know, you can't help but wonder and think about the what if. But at my core, I do think
he was just a little too good of a person for me. And to accept that someone that perfect and genuine was someone
that I could be with never really, I don't think
I could ever accept that. - [Thoraya] Why don't you
think you could accept that? - I just saw all the flaws in myself and I don't think I'm a bad person, but I just didn't think that
he deserved someone like me. I didn't think I was good enough for him. - [Thoraya] Is there
any part of you that's like, still waiting? - No, I met someone else and it was definitely a, you know, decision between the two and I went with the safer option that I think made more sense on paper. He's American, so wasn't
dealing with visas. - [Thoraya] So are
you okay with the person that you're seeing now seeing this? - I'm with them and I'm
happy to be with them and that's what I choose, no matter, so. - So I had to move to
Paris because of my work. And on Monday, I was walking with three or four friends along the Seine, which is the river in Paris. And they were a big group. There was a big group
who was dancing salsa. I was sitting on the corner,
watching the crowd dancing and I saw this very
beautiful girl next to me and I asked her if she
would like to dance with me. And she said she cannot dance salsa. And I said, I cannot dance salsa as well, but we can try together. And that's how it started. We were there, dancing and we had immediately, a very good vibe and we spent a lot of
months together in Paris. It was amazing time. She seemed like the
perfect person in my life. And after a few months, I
had to leave, unfortunately because my job was calling back to Germany and that's how we separated. Distance came between
each other and after, we continued for another five, six months. But after some time, we both
saw that it has no future because there's a big distance and there's no foreseeable
way that we could live together in the same city. - I guess the one that
got away, it's interesting because I was the one that let go, but because I wasn't
at a point in my life, where I was ready to fully commit, sort of had to let go to experience life, experience a new chapter. And truthfully, I haven't let go fully, but I've reached a sense
of content, I guess, with letting him go. But I don't think I'll ever be fully, be able to fully move on. There's this theory called
the red string theory and I think that, it basically explains that there's somebody that
you're tied to, like your souls, which sounds really deep, but I think that he was my red string. So I guess maybe he didn't
get away, like I did let go. But I think he'll always, I'll always sort of be stuck with him in a
way, if that makes sense. And I've like, I've dated people since and relationships have been lovely, but I ultimately, my end goal is to just find love within myself, rather than with somebody else. And then I believe once I find that love, then somebody will come into my life and I'll be ready for it. - I feel like everyone
that I thought was the one that got away, the longer it's been, the happier I, like it didn't work out. - [Friends off camera] She's the one who got away. - [Thoraya] Right. - Do you feel that way? - Yeah, totally. - I'm the one that got away. Always get those texts afterwards like, damn I really appreciate
everything you've done for me. Or they start to realize everything I was to them after the fact. But I never have those same notes. It's, once I'm off here, it's done - Okay about this. I don't have the feeling
that I have something, some issue open. So whatever branch needed to
be cut out has been cut out. I love each one of them,
but I am on my own way and they live their
own life in good health and I'm happy for them. - Well, I can, but I'm still trying to figure
if she actually got away or if I'm getting away. It's like a work in progress. I don't think either one of
us wants us, either one of us to get away and yet we don't know how to stop it either. - [Thoraya] So it's happening now? - It's, yes, it's happening now. - [Thoraya] I think,
I don't know, your answer is so interesting to me 'cause most people I've
asked this question to today, have had some time since the breakup or like, since the getting away and they've like, found words
to describe it, have like, figured out what actually happened or their interpretation of it. And you're such a good example of like, how when it's happening you don't even know what's happening. Yeah, so I think your answer, it gives like a really raw perspective, - Right. I don't know who pushed who,
there's definitely pushing. So many people have gotten away - Conveniently, she didn't get away. I'm having a beautiful walk in
the park with her right now. This is my best friend, like,
I'm really on this adventure with her and I can go anywhere with her. I can kind of see the rest
of this realm while I'm here with amazing fresh eyes, with somebody that I don't mind
sharing the thought with. I'd rather not tell her like
hey, I went to this cool place, I'm gonna say hey, remember when we went there together? It's like why not keep that as the story? - The one that got away came back again and that was probably
about three years later. And you know, we've been together for about 39 years at this point. So he hasn't run away again, cheers. - [Thoraya] All right. So I'm asking people today to tell me about the one that got away. - Oh my god, Jesus Christ. The one that got away, huh? I don't think I have one
that got away, actually. I don't think I have one that got away because you know, if it's real, it's real and it'll come back to you. And if it wasn't meant to
be, it's not meant to be. So I don't think I have one that got away, but yeah. (light music)
