TASHA COBBS LEONARD: From Miscarriage to Surrender & Marriage | Dear Future Wifey Podcast Ep816

mhm so when did it happen to where the romance came into your friendship I love this cuz this about to be so Tasha one night I just told him I said you got feelings for me he cannot stand when I tell that I said I did I said you have feelings for me now how old is that why can I just say I got feelings for you cuz you you had to project it and that was good that you did it like that because it wasn't like you were pursuing him you made him confess his that he wanted to pursue me right I helped him out him you gave him Ali and you said you told him you told him he for me he he could not disagree I said I I think we need to discuss this we G have to talk about this it was the truth look at us now come on seven years down the road ladies that's a little tip yeah tell them tell you're not you're not being too aggressive you're just like helping it's helping we called to be helped we called to help right y supp be the help meate yeah and so you told him how he felt about you yes and he said and he couldn't disagree every second that escapes without you here with me keeps my heart anticipating till I finally see when I made my vows I told God that I was going to take care of this gift all my life I've been waiting for you girl you know I've been praying for you been writing these love letters so I fight for that future in the present you know what I'm saying that was Goods to the ones who found love for the Hope and New Beginnings from heaven above I await my future wifey I pray that it fall won't be too long too long every welcome to the dear future wifey podcast I'm your host l teras r withfield listen are you still shacking up with us if you're still shacking up with us come on can we get a commitment hit that subscription button and subscribe make sure you turn on your notification Bell so you'll be notified about upcoming episodes listen this season has been absolutely amazing I've been reading all the comments on YouTube all the DMS uh man thank y'all so much for uh joining me on the love blueprint Master Class um gosh that was so healing for all of us well let me tell you something I I you know I'll be saying some prayers on my podcast I you know when I launched this in 2020 I had some specific people that I wanted to talk to on the podcast and let me tell you God heard my prayers and so without further Ado welcome to the dear future wifey podcast my homie Tasha cobs Leonard how you doing Queen We in this thing we in this thing finally made it finally made it but you but you came without your husband where he at listen uhhuh I ain't going to tell you who but they cancel this flight I ain't going to say no name we going to throw the airline under the bus cuz I might need y'all to sponsor one of my podcast epis right going say no names they going to say no Nam they cancel the man this morning he said he was ready huh he said prepared so I get to tell all the stories my way I'm enjoy this well listen man I told you when you came in um that I worked with you when I did you know during my season as a national playright director producer I did a production uh for oiff Bible Fellowship and um you graced the stage and of course you sang Break Every Chain come on let me tell you something did you ever believe that that song would be as big as it became you know what I have a story behind that song the I knew that it would impact people's lives the way that it did how did you I did not because I I personally experienced it myself the testimony behind that song is one night I was down south in Georgia I'm from Georgia and me and my team had done a concert in like Warner Robins Georgia something like that and I was driving I like to drive so I'm driving everybody everybody else snoring I'm driving and in that season I was really dealing with deep depression and anxiety and fear during that time and not a lot of people knew it so while I was driving I would just have a playlist playing and this song Break Every Chain came on and immediately it started to just chip away at this dark season that I was in and so I would listen to it for 24 hours for like the next two weeks non-stop Non-Stop and that was how I began my healing towards Freedom From That season of depression so people ask me all the time do you get tired of singing it no I don't because I know what that song in particular can do in your life I'm a living testimony so the testimony behind that song is that's the reason why I can sing it the way I do I want to ask you then because I know as an artist you've heard probably tons of testimonies surrounding that song what what kind of feedback have you heard what kind of testimonies oh I mean everything from healing miraculous healing to people being set free from like I just said dark seasons of depression and fear um it's a fames being mended like I I remember um a a husband so I get these don't now don't send me DMS y'all but I check them sometimes and sometimes I'll get these testimonies and this one just stood out to me there was a husband who was in the hospital very very sick and the wife chose to play Break Every Chain in his bedroom non-stop experience complete healing in that in that H like those they just stand and that one is probably about nine 10 years old but I never forget these testimonies and I have them in the back of my head every time I'm singing that song and I have an expectation that when this song is released in a room some body is about to get a miracle you said I have an expectation yeah I do so you don't get up on stage you sing that song just like another song on the set oh no you say I when I sing this song I need for an encounter to take place yep yep I I have an expectation and sometimes I have to remind the room that hey this is not our favorite song from the radio it's not a a cool little jingle like this is a declaration and we expect God to do something when we sing it yeah for real kind trouble to have you sing a little snippet of it there is power in the name of Jesus to Break Every Chain Break Every Chain Break Every Chain so what made you so when you recorded it was it a moment in the studio where you were crying while you're recording it or what happened or was you just trying to just perfect in the studio like what what happened on the recording it was a live it was a live recording so um that album is Grace that's the album has Break Every Chain confidence happy all those songs on there um it was the one song that we were sold on like everything else I was like hey we might have to write some stuff but this song is GNA be the one that so it was the one song that we were fully sold this is g to be on this album and in the room in that moment the same thing I feel now 12 years later when we sing that song 12 years later is literally what happened in the room in that moment we could barely move on like we could barely move on yep do we need to get our tissues already because I feel like this my well I sitting over here it's over here cuz I'm just I'm just thinking about I'm just going back in my mind about even when I first heard that song and it's like it's one of those songs that truly arrest you yeah it's like you can you can't listen to that song it's just like oh this a cool little song and you just start singing it like a jingle or something no when you when you hear it it makes you reflect on every stronghold that the enemy has placed on your mind on your family generation curses and I I remember listening that song and I you know having the privilege to hear you sing it live in a play that I wrote and I'm sitting up there listening I'm going wow and then the graphic behind you we put these little chains that just kept spinning around and they were broken links and stuff and I was sitting there listening I was like this girl is bad like it's just it's just yeah it's just yeah I I I don't want to stay on that because it's it's G we going to get through the interview because I remember that it's these moment it's these encounters that take place and that's why gospel music is not like any other music you know um and it's just it's just a powerful thing which is interesting it just it just daed on me um do you get controversy when you begin to collaborate with other secular artist because I remember you collaborated with uh Nicki Minaj on the song right um what was the thought process behind that for sure I don't know if it's so much thought as it is obedience like uh there there I I'll I'll say something about me I'm not walking through a door that God didn't provide for me I'm not going to stand on any platform that he didn't tell me to stand on I am not going to do anything with this ministry that he's entrusted me with that he has not given me instruction instruction to do so it's less of thinking and more of obedience and I have this thing Kitty if Kenny was here he would tell you I before I could think of logical reasons to give God a no I just go ahead and say yes like so people ask me all the time well how did you start that business what made you do that I just said yes before I could think of a reason to say no and before you know it you out in the middle of the water you can't turn around you said before I think of logical reasons to say no I just go ahead and say yeah I do it yeah and so even with those th those um collaborations like I have collaborations with Sierra and common and I mean you know and and it's it's all divinely orchestrated by God that that we reach a a a a people who may not come to our churches you know I remember the first song that cuz we have me and Nikki got two songs I did one on her her album that just came out called blessings and it's really been a blessing to people but that first song I remember we were recording my album heart passion Pursuit and we were in the studio and back then I was just posting Clips like just you know y'all hear this song we're about to do we're about to I'm just excited right and so Nikki sees one of the clips to the song I'm getting ready and she sends me a message because we we communicated often we actually have a friendship okay so y'all knew each other before y start working together absolutely so she said hey when you finish this song I'm getting ready send it to me and I'm put 16 bars on it and immediately I thought she has got to be kidding me right and so I'm texting like are you sure she was like send it to me I'm G put 16 bars on it and um she said to me this will be the first opportunity that I have to expose my relationship with God to my followers and I want to do it on your album she said that to me so who am I to say there you go this person can't worship god there you go you're starting too soon yeah because now now see you're making my tear duck start acting up yeah because we have a [Music] bit who am I to like like even what you just said she says I want to expose yeah my relationship with God to my followers yeah and a lot of times people it don't look like how it quote unquote should look like as you know not we want to look yeah yeah how we want and and you don't understand someone journey and I always say if you talk to Paul you know when he was when he was Saul you'd be like oh he's the devil I don't want nothing to do with you and he's a great person that God used in the Bible one encounter one encounter one encounter and we don't never think about what if we are that encounter that encounter yeah yeah it was it was it was an immediate yes for me like everything in my spirit said yes so what the label say the label say uh did you have anybody push back they was like thank you this not all but you know after the release of course I mean people it was an uproar because it took us a while to release like the the list of songs on it and I think one night I was like okay this is a night total label we GNA do it so we released all of the songs which that album just it it it broke so many records it just it just took on a life of its own you know outside of the Nikki and I'm getting ready it was just a great album and I when we put out I'm getting ready and had Nicki on there oh my goodness that next morning I listen social media was in an uproar y'all had yourselves in a jumble you hear me but you know what I I believe that I had equipped myself for it mentally so it didn't do nothing to you it just it just no I won't ever say it doesn't do anything right you know I I think and I can't speak for everybody but for me we we are human yeah and you can read 20,000 comments for you that's like you two of them you God lord you know you got you need therapy you know so it it I believe I have placed myself in a mental space where I prepared for it you know you know how you can brace yourself for something but you still feel the blow you know that's that's how I was but never once did I question whether it was the will of God not once so how did you comb it what were some things that you said that did you even make any statements publicly about it I did not I I may have did one I I don't even think I did I you know I that was one of the things I I grew up Pentecostal Holiness you know used had a statement let the Lord fight your battles I I really felt like that was something that in my spirit I felt like God would be the one to make the statement you know just like you know I think of the story with Mary and Martha where Martha's like hey you need to work work work work work she she's sitting there and Jesus is like he spoke up for Mary she didn't have to say was doing all this this complaining and Mary didn't have to say a thing Jesus spoke up for her and I felt like he was going to speak up for me and right now I can show you DMS of people who were who like in 2017 you know I didn't understand what you were doing and I apologize I I have so many messages of people who have seen how that song has impacted so many people's lives you know and so I feel like the Lord fought the Battle yeah but in the midst of it you get this big song um have has it been of course you got to say no names but has it been other artists that have reached out to you that the Holy Spirit told you not to record a song with absolutely absolutely so you ain't just saying yes before you say no you ain't just saying yes to everything right right right right uh yeah there have been and and it it's because you know think they have it has to be aligned with what God has called you to do yeah you know so I I feel like you can't just jump out there and do everything so I I give God a yes yeah before I can think of a reason to say no not everybody so how has your relationship Journey been um you got married um seven years now seven years ago did you feel like you would been married sooner like you know a lot of women in their 20s they' be like I'mma be married by 25 you know and then after 25 it's just progressively gets more discouraging and when they hit 30 it's like I'm not married yet and so they start getting very discouraged was that your journey this might not be a popular answer but it's my answer I I felt like I would be married but the details were foggy like I never could put my finger on when it would be how it would be or who it would be I had one one um one request of God is that the person that I would marry would know me for the Tasha Cobbs that everybody else knew mhm but you you had that request before you ever knew you was going to be the Tasha cobs everybody else would know well my it been prophesied to me for for my entire life so okay you know the the the word of Prophecy that had come to me it was my prayer that whatever God would do with my life my husband would know the me that my family knows that that Tasha that little tat tot little tat Tot so what was prophesied to you early on well from my mom I there's one that stands out to me specifically that really came to pass my mother was like an intense worshipper so I say all the time I grew up in the Pentecostal Holiness Church so we shouted and shouted and praise praise praise but my mother was more like a crier she would just be the one in the corner hands lifted and we were like oh that lady right there she's so de but it it worked in our F my dad was a praiser so he was like a preacher he stood up in the pews you know all that and um I remember one day my mother was driving she used to work at Fort Stewart Georgia um she worked on the label based for a while and um she came home she sat in the garage for like 30 minutes just out there worshiping and crying and when she got out the car she came inside and she said the Lord spoke to me and he said that people will know your name before they know your face and um when I go back to the video this makes me tear of me went in the Grammy seven days after my father went to be with the Lord people did not know my face when they said Tasha cobs everybody was looking around like who is that you know like who where is she because we've heard this song Break Every Chain we've all been singing it in our churches but we don't know what she look like and so when I got that was my mother's the word she had given me coming to pass and people would know your they will know your face your name before they know your face and so many prophecies have come to pass like that like I see your name in lights but a lot of people and I love that I love that God would keep me hidden behind him like it's never been about you better quit playing don't you start preaching and I want to keep it you know keep it that way it's not about me it's always been about him in the Forefront yep your mama she's proph see I thought you about to say you was at some Revival and some Prophet came called you out and then prophesied that over you but your mama yes that's different that's different that's different because you came from her and I believe that as parents and and and now since you've been a parent you going you're going to experience all that is that where God you experience a download on God where he begins to show you your uh child and the trajectory of their life you know uh in the before place so you'll get a chance to see it and you'll be like hm and you'll just watch it just play itself cuz I used to say God was the biggest snitch on me God used to tell man God used to tell my mom all kind of stuff i' be like what I mean I'll be doing something I ain't got no business my mama walking there she said what goes on in the dark comes to light what you talking about on M and she tell me what I was doing and ID be like how she know this and she said baby you don't know I pray yeah I talk to God he talked to me about you man let me tell you something I didn't believe it I didn't know until it just kept showing up and so it taught me to have a heart posture behind my kids of prayer um as you so you never knew the time the season of when you were going to get married the age who it was what profession he was going to be in and you just said for whatever reason you said you wanted him to know the Tasha the Tata before that person before the fame and everything else why did you feel like that you know I just I I wanted it to I wanted to be sure that this is you love me you don't love everything else that's connected to the name but you truly love me and God and God answered that prayer answer that prayer how did we meet I get to tell my story k k Kenny Kenny can't come debate it I'll give you an opportunity to come on the podcast and you can debate it later whatever right because a little there some little nuances in there uh so I met Kenny I I was going to a worship conference in Charlotte North Carolina uh Teresa Harrison used to have a worship conference called uh gospel Heritage so we were going to gospel Heritage and I was there with William Murphy he was singing that night and so William Murphy was up teaching a class his class went over time I'm telling truth right now go tell the truth tell class went over time he looks at me and he says Todd I need you to go do my rehearsal so at the time I was serving as the worship pastor at the Dream Center in Atlanta um under Bishop William Murphy and and so I went and I said okay I'm going to do this I already didn't want to be there he woke us up four o'clock this that morning like we're going to Charlotte I didn't want to be there I was agitated I was also in that season of depression that I told you about what what year was this this was 20 2009 2009 I had all of these walls up you know I just I was in an emot emotional space that was unhealthy already and uh so I went in and I was like oh Lord y'all singing the wrong version of uh Praises what I do who's in charge here I'm like now Kenny his story is I Slamm doors there was no door there was no door it was no door inside no K was like what church don't have a door so anyway so I walked in I like who is who's in in charge here you're doing the wrong version of the song so he stands up hi my name is Kenneth Leonard all calm he was like anything that you need we'll make sure that we fix it by it by the time it's time for you to minister tonight so I was like who is this guy because you your energy need to meet my energy you know if I'm in an uproar he needs to be an uo he need be up here everybody needs to be frantic you know and I've always said from that moment until this when he's the calm to my storm he is it could be going crazy he's always going to be settled always going to be calm so so I say you know y'all sing the wrong version of the song He's like okay we'll fix it he handed me his business card and I was like who is this guy you know in the band everything by the time we got there that night everything was fixed I mean Bishop Murphy got up people could not get off the floor and worship it was just great and after that it was this was during Myspace time so Kenny yeah he sent a MySpace message to me and he said um I just don't know why but I feel like we need to stay connected and literally for years I I got him dressed for dates we were the best best of friends oh y'all became homies homies like he knew the TT tot before people as a matter of fact when I released my album smile he was playing at a church and you know how churches play worship music before the service the song came on and people started singing my song all over the church and he called me and said do you know that these people singing your song everywhere like how did they know you I was I was thinking this he has no clue what for real he just didn't know he he was that detached during that time Kenny was touring with a lot of R&B artists so he traveled with Anthony Hamilton he had not been in in he had just not been in a worship setting yet to know that smile had been taken off so it's the way that Gody worked it out you know and we spent years where even with our friendship after he got married we just kind of lost touch for a while and then after he went through a season of of darkness and he got a divorce and depression and then we reconnected he he sent me a message one day I I need my friend and then after that it was like okay y'all have been crazy all this time not knowing that you love each other like it was one of those stories for real did you love him I did or did you just look at him as like oh just my homeboy I did both it was it but was it so was it any romantic feelings like when you first met him was there you know how you feel that little tingle or that little spark or whatever it was just like who this guy we cool this the guy that fix Praises what I do so I wouldn't get youw it out I mean cool I would he would date these girls and I be like she crazy you he was going all these like meetings and stuff like this is crazy so so during that whole time it still wasn't no romantic feeling you just like you wasn't like man she don't know how to appreciate him like I would nope that I never I don't know why and I just I guess it took both of us experiencing more life before we realized that we had tools that each one of us needed for the other yeah yep it took time so I and I will be an advocate for people who say don't rush things cuz we needed that season of friendship for the strength that we have in our marriage right now we needed that listen I need y'all to receive that right there I always talk about that I always talk about um um I want to go from friend to fiance and what that means to me is that you have such a strong friendship because in the Bible you didn't have all that stuff you didn't have no girlfriend no boyfriend you have none of that stuff you know what I'm saying engaged you you was married you know what I'm saying it's like you had suitors that's it and so at the end of the day you you hit the nail in the head because when you have a foundational friendship when the marriage get Rocky when you don't like each other when you annoyed you can go back to that friendship and every couple that I have that has built a solid friendship that's bu on this podcast they'll say I want to talk to my wife right now I want to talk to my best friend Y and when you said when he called you up and said I need my friend right now ah yeah yep yeah so during that phone call when did it start turning when did it turn from when y'all reconnected as friends what made it start turning because it was no longer surface that it unlocked another space of transparency and depth with both of us because though he was sharing that he was in a dark place I was too you know and the world didn't know that they knew hey this is the girl that's on the stage and she's making us happy and she's making us smile but I would go home for days and be in the dark plagued by anxiety and fear and so to have that one person who could also relate to one person not just a person somebody I can trust somebody that I knew was going to go out and expose y' singing her songs but she dealing with you know I was safe both of us were were safe and that unlocked another space in our relationship were you dating around that time I was not dating I I I I didn't have the capacity I was just so it was a really dark place were you dater at any point even when you met him he got married during that season where you dat was you almost close to married with nobody I was I was probably one of them people too consumed with life and work and you know I looking back I and I went through therapy even for this because I was Al always a person who lived for what's next so like we we'll talk about this in a few minutes I I'm in a new season now but finish writing that book today something happened I I would I wouldn't live to celebrate it I would just be like okay now what's next wait did it e did y'all send out email did you I lived in in the future but I had to learn how to live in the present and celebrate moments and I think during that season even with Kenny I remember going through therapy I want to share this and the therapist told me to do something with my closest friends and my loved ones she was like I need you to make them make you be present so like to this day if I'm living too far in the future Kenny will make me sit down and say how do you feel do you have a headache you know do your feet hurt how how do you feel like they make me be present like I I loved that was one of the things that really shifted my life and made me live in the present I think too many times we live in a ambitious go-getter kind of world where we don't stop to celebrate what God is doing right now Sasha let me tell you something you speaking um last year I was very intentional on doing that with myself because that was the thorn in my side for several years when I was touring shows across the country I don't have a lot of pictures from me touring my place I used be I tour National plays across the country and I and um I don't be having no pictures to show for it I don't nothing cuz the promoters be like we got to make sure next Market we got to make sure we gross in this and gross in that and I was in this performance mentality and so it just kept me I couldn't even celebrate and I had the biggest migraines during that time I would get off the stage sit down in my hotel room I wear suits and stuff I started touring shows when I was 23 years old and I would sit down and I would fall asleep in about 5 seconds and I wake up with alligator shoes on full suit on and I'm waking up just fully dressed and I'm like that was horrible sleep and that would happen so often and so last year I kept saying I'mma start celebrating milestones in my life so if I hit a certain number on YouTube I'll go buy me a little gift to take myself out to eat if I if I get know tashak cab on the podcast and I'mma go celebrate that today I'll be like you know what God thank you for doing that because often times we'll pray prayers and we'll see it manifested and we keep living through it God said I just remember see in the Bible they would stop to build an altar you better talk about it and so that's what I used to use girl you all you all of my business that's what I would use to celebrate me I said God when God did stuff uh in the Bible they would stop and build uh an altar in remembrance and say God I remember this season of my life you did this for me so I'm going build something as a memorial to remind me of what you did but now we just go from one moment to the next like oh thank you next thing next thing Performance Based and so that's your beautiful altar that's sitting on that table right there of the manifestation of tears and and as you bled on these Pages you know what I'm saying and and to remind yourself to be present and not go all right well let's see I need to go do the next book girl the first book ain't came out yet right well I need to start working on my next like you just be present and celebrate that so I thank you so much for actually sharing that um and now you've taught me to even be more intentional to to tell my friends and family to remind me to be present me to be present remind me he said do your feet hurt right now yeah cuz talk about it Tasha cuz I got arthritis in my toes and he just said do your feet hurt do your feet hurt that that is you know what it's funny but it is literally it's real like H it makes you be present it makes me stop to think am I in pain because you know sometimes we could us Workaholics and people walk straight through it and you won't even realize that you're in pain right now like you you not feeling good you don't remember you don't even recognize that you hungry you haven't eating all day you just be working singing you be like I haven't eat nothing all day you to REM yourself of the simple things of life and it sounds crazy but it's something that we have to remind ourselves and I really even I feel like right now that it's a tool that the enemy uses to keep us from focusing on the greatness of God like if you establish reminders and monuments and altars you always have a place to go back to remind you just of how good he is sometimes we can get in Seasons that are challenging and because we don't have reminders we never stop to build a monument or to build an altar we don't have anything to come back to show you no he was good then and he gonna be good again I think you just wrote your I think you just wrote your next song that's the next song yeah build an altar God that right there boy it's something on that wow it's something on that y'all got to do that you have to stop to recognize when God has done something in your life and I think and culture will tell you well Church culture will tell you you ain't supposed to celebrate but the Bible says something totally different wow W could nobody be Jesus telling you who he was he said I am the way I he would tell you listen if you got it wrong he'll say but who do you say that I am who do you say that I am he was like let me remind y'all real quick and this hey I ain't bragging I'm just telling the truth it's who I am let me ask you this did you have problem celebrating yourself I did at what point did it finally click to say I'm going to celebrate what God has done it was around that same time because I I think you just carry so much weight of being great or being successful or completing the next task that you don't really stop to celebrate what God has done through you and and how he will use you you know I think it's it is how do I say this it is a honor it is an honor for God to choose to use your gifts whatever they are yes and I think it's a slap in the face when we say I'm not GNA celebrate what God gave me or how God chooses to use me when God is like I want you to praise me for this do you remember what you did in celebration of yourself for me it's rest vacationing that's how I celebrate like hey all right now you can take some time off you can take some time away and I wasn't always like that like right now we actually put it on our calendars so that we you don't cuz you have a tendency to skip over like all those three days can wait we can do it next month the next month never comes yeah so you take vacations we do you go travel I have one playing right now when is it when is it where y when we come off this tour I have a couple things um happening right in the next couple weeks after that and then we're going on we're gonna take four days just four days to breathe be up no I'm going to stay in the country is it hard for you get out the country I'm not an out the country kind of person why not cuz I need to be able to get back to Asher I need to get Ash quick got get back to my baby my baby boy is it hard for you to be away it is it is I right now we've been on tour for um 30 cities and Ash's two and a half so that's been tough because he started school while I was gone I did get to take him on his first day so that was great good um so it's just been kind of tough watching how he's grown so quickly just being around other children being in school and I have to watch it on FaceTime but somebody told me something that I'll never forget um it's a pastor her name is fena friend and she said to me um when God equipped you he equipped them for the life that you were called to live and so that I always keep that at the Forefront of my mind guilty of of of the guilt yes that he's equipped for this all right we going to keep cuz you know you start talking about the kids we can talk about that I'm going to come back to that we going to unpack we going to build to that so when did it happen to where the romance came into your friendship I love this cuz this about to be so Tasha one night I just told him I said you got feelings for me he cannot stand when I tell that I said I did I said you have feelings for me now how old is that why can't I just say I got feelings for you cuz you you had to project it and that was good that you did it like that because it wasn't like you was pursuing him you made him confess his that he wanted to pursue me right I helped him out you gave him Ali and you said you told him you told him he what he he could not disagree I said I I think we need to discuss this we G have to talk about this it was the truth look at us now come on seven years down the road ladies that's a little tip yeah tell them you're not you're not being too aggressive you're just like helping it's helping we called to be help we called to help right y supposed to be the help mate and so you told him how he felt about you yes and he said and he couldn't disagree he just said what we we actually just discussed it over the next couple days it was a few days cuz he had to think about that thing it was you know that is something like that'll catch you off guard I if if I I'm that kind of person if I muster up the boldness and the strength I'm going say it's just you just do it sometimes you just got to do it anyway how long did y'all date before the proposal it was years years yeah so about two years because Kenny actually um he was married before right so he has two CH two he has two children from that marriage and we wanted to make sure that the timing was right for the children right you always have to blending families BL blending families is important and it's important that you put the children at the at the for of it so you were self you you were aware of that even going in mm and even with with um Shia our baby's mom she's my friend sh it was so cool um with her she allowed me so symphany is a baby girl so syphy was three years old at the time and so she allowed me to spend time with Symphony first so I started with the baby and who did the the ex-wife did yep that's beautiful yeah so we from the beginning we we had a very uh we had great communication how' that work out how did that first introduction to his ex-wife work out like she like cuz that sounds very healthy oh no no we sounds very healthy sounds very healthy you know we had we had some unhealthy seasons and we had some very hard conversations but at the end of the day all of us committed to making sure that our kids had the best parental experience yes and I think having a bonus mom we we teach them that y'all just got extra you know and so it wasn't always that way but I will never forget this there was a podcast with Will Smith uh Jada pinket and Will Smith's oldest son's mom they did an interview together and in the interview uh the mother was talking about how Jada loved her son so much that it made her love Jada and our baby's mom she sent me that um that that interview and she said this is how I feel she was like I I've not been able to articulate it until I saw this she said all of both of us was just a mess she said the way that you love my children makes me want to love you and from that yep from that conversation until now we work tirelessly to make sure that our relationship is as healthy as it can be so that our kids have the best parental experience ever do you realize what y'all did for those kids see they don't have the they they're not going to grow up with the testimony of yeah my mama don't like my my dad new wife they this this got to walk on eggshells I got to pretend like I really don't like my my my bonus mom because my mom is jealous of that so I got to act like I don't like her when I'm around her and then I got to act like and they just learn how to DS all that crazy stuff they can just be healthy and the fact that she was so self-aware enough to know that she could see that you don't have any ill intentions and that you truly love her kids so much that she says I can't help but love you because I see how much you love kids that is beautiful when I say I want that to resonate with everybody that's watching this episode those that have um families that didn't go ideal the traditional uh nucleus family or whatever where you have the the I hate to say baby mama baby daddy situation but what but y'all not living in the same household with your kids or whatnot that you can still have a healthy parental Dynamic if you it requ a lot of selflessness a lot yep y a lot and I want to say this and from the beginning it wasn't always that way but I have to give all of us do we give kudos to Kenny the way that he managed all of us so well like he would lean in where he felt more of his energy needed to be and then he would pull away when he felt like okay they have to experience this on their on their own he would allow us to have our conversations when he needed to interject he would interject even with the kids the way that he would sit down with each one of them because he tells it this way that he's also a bonus father so he went through that so with it's um with his first marriage our middle son our our oldest son is from his first marriage so that's his bonus son but they're all our children and so he he from experience he says so I've been on both sides of this and I understand what it takes to manage both Dynamics and so he did so well in allowing us allowing us to have our space but also interjecting wisdom when it needed to be there Kenny let me tell you something he's the guy I salute you king that's what I'm talking about that's what that's what what that's the epitome when the Bible says you are the priest of your home yes that's what he did that's what he cultivated that's what he curated and it's like it's we can go on and on about that because I believe that as men as Leaders that's what we that's how we model leadership like that if you can set the tone in your household to be like hold on we not going to be doing this we not going to be doing this this is what we're going to do together then women they they will acquest to that to that that masculine energy and let me tell you that's he did because there would be times where each one of us we want to say something I want you know you how you want to get back you want to get back and he would be like that's not how we handled that what's how is that he would use words like how is that going to help us to progress if you say that that way you're saying that from emotion not in a way that's wise enough to help us build our family Dynamic I mean literally he talks like Kenny Kenny I'mma tell you this right quick and you ask God if this agrees with you but you need to be writing a book about that you need to write a book about co-parenting and that would be absolutely power because I believe that especially our culturist African-Americans could man you would be doing a great service to us to learn that because that would be that would that would be a generational shift because that's what's happening in our culture is that we have all this non you see it on social media all the time it's crazy you'll see prime example even when it comes to Sierra and and and and Russell you'll hear them try to throw I mean you hear people on social media be throwing uh who who Who's a baby daddy uh what's the man name future future future you know all that why can't it just be healthy why can't it be like he Russell says listen I am going to parent your son like it's my own you know why can't it be that and it be okay and not become toxic with all this type of stuff we live in a culture where people just love toxic they love we have to make everything toxic why can't everything just some things are just it's good it's good I it didn't work out in this situation but it's working out in this situation it's not the how y'all plan it to be but at the end of the day it's work it's it's working out all things work together for the good them that love God to the C according to his purpose why can't it be that so I love that that Kenny was very instrumental in doing that to make sure that y'all like y'all level set and he cast vision and that's the thing about being a leader is casting Vision over your household where you say Hey listen this is this is this is counterproductive to to the end result and that's that's I get excited about that stuff and so y'all d for two years before the famous question will you marry me how'd that happen it was private and our wedding was actually private too I can't wait to get there so we were actually watching a movie just sitting at the house watching a movie and he gets up off the S and I'm like what is really happening because you're not I told you I didn't have any idea expectations whatsoever which I think was probably great for him you know and he just he just shared his heart with me that you know there's nobody else for me I choose you for the rest of my life you know y'all know you know little bills y'all do yeah that's beautiful and he asked me would I would I marry him yep it was just me and him and what did you say absolutely yes absolutely about it you say listen I gave him a yes before yes before I logical reason say no yep and we went to we prepared a wedding one of the things that we both wanted because we liveed such a um a life that was in front of the people we wanted it to be private and so we sent out dinner invitations for a New Year's dinner to all of our close friends and family that Kenny and Tasha want you to join them for a dinner they did not know I'm talking to the only people that knew were our parents and team members so when people showed up to this venue I wanted them when they wrote when they pulled up the first thing I wanted them to see was a wedding cake so they thought they were coming to eat and literally when you drive up there's valet and a wedding cake in the window and they're like no they didn't all of my aunts we call them the goldie girls my mom sisters they're like no look what I got on what why you didn't tell me it was a wedd you know but that's how we wanted it we wanted it to be the people that we knew would celebrate and pray for us not just for this one event but for the rest of our lives and so we had friends that were there who stood with us they made a commitment to challenge Us in seasons and to make sure that we we we uh were faithful to this to this marriage it was exactly what we wanted exactly so we had about a 100 people in the room yeah it was it was beautiful and who was the efficient Bishop Brian Pierce uh that's Kenny's spiritual father um from Mount Zion in Greensboro North Carolina youed to sing with Men of Standard yes yes Pi that's our spiritual father stand I'm singing boy they say singing when they tough Jesus goodness Isaac oh God good shout out to Isaac I was just with him a couple of uh weeks ago in Atlanta but yeah man that's man so so private ceremony y'all were both in alignment with that y'all both wanted the same thing um so I take it that you're not a big showy type of woman where you needed all the where did that come from fare yeah I mean did did did you have any you know family members I know you say your aunts The Golden Girls made some but did did anybody feel like well I wish yeah slide it from it did they I don't think so I think it was their expectation just knowing me yeah you know I me and my mom we laugh about it all the time she can't think of one time that me and her ever sat down and did a a what a collage what Tasha's wedding gonna look like it just it just I you know what I've never really thought of it this deep into this conversation I just I knew I was going to get married didn't know why how didn't exp you know I might not be the right person for this podcast no you're the perfect person you're the perfect person there are some people like that because that's but see that's because sometimes people they I they idolize marriage but they don't put enough emphasis on the I mean they idolize the wedding but they don't put enough emphasis on the marriage and so I don't see see anything wrong with that my daughter was the same way so my daughter got married a year and 3 months ago and I man I made up in my mind how her wedding going to be you fixed it up man I picked the venue I did all this stuff I said we going to do this and then one day she stopped She said daddy that's that's not what I want what I want I said what you mean that's not what what we want she said well me and and and my fiance Tay we want something simple you going to have all these people your friends there we don't know them people you know she said I just want about 20 people people I know you made it a production I said yeah I said your dad is a producer what are you I felt slighted I already had planned our first dance don't do this to me don't do this to me I'm getting married what is wrong with you can't you do this she was like I don't I don't need all that my daughter got married in the so I booked the venue originally and um she told me not to do it she said listen I don't want that that's too big so I gifted on the first year of my podcast in 2020 uh I did a um um it's called black love matters where I sponsored three couples getting married so I used that venue to say all I can't let it go to waste so me and my team we got together and we sponsored three couples to have a group wedding but that's because wow my daughter didn't want to do the wedding there so then I had to gift it with other people so I was like this is some nonsense she she At first she was going to do a destination wedding later on she ended up getting married in the clubhouse of her apartment wow that was it it was a little it was a clubhouse see I love order some uh Olive Garden her mama paid for the Olive Garden it was real simple I said this is so simple and she was like but I still cried the same yep when I was standing there about to give away I still cried the same I looked eyes and I was like this is beautiful because it was what she wanted you know and um and it was just it was just beautiful so I love the fact that you know it ain't like you couldn't afford it yeah yeah yeah it was like like I don't need all that this is going to be what we want and the fact that y'all were aligned in that and it's beautiful and the fact that you said no I didn't have thank you Holy Spirit you didn't have it all picked out about what he was going to look like what he's going to be what age he going to be you literally surrender to the Holy Spirit guiding you whenever that date was going to come whoever it was going to be however whatever his profession is going to be you just said I'm surrendered yeah absolutely that's the most powerful thing that I want people to take away from it because people get into depression because they didn't get married the time that they they wanted they wanted it was like I was supposed to be married by now were you really were you really supposed to be married by now if you said that God will order your steps and that step hadn't been ordered yet so was you really supposed to be married by now yeah yeah I was 36 36 36 yeah and I mean to a lot of people that's late it's a lot of people at 30 they start cringing like oh my goodness oh my goodness you know and I would just encourage a lot of women to submerge yourself number one into your relationship with Christ and I know we don't want to hear that you think it's so deep it's so churchy but you would be surprised how fulfilling that is and it's not so much about stay in the Bible stay you submerging yourself in your relationship with Christ can be hey take yourself out hang out with your girls you know find yourself create a make yourself a wife there it is make yourself a wife and I don't mean the cooking and cleaning I mean be whole there it is be happy with yourself there it is like the way that you look you know take care of yourself find yourself engulfed into your career and into your Ministries whatever you whatever you're called to do like there are so many other things to do than to sit around and allow the enemy to make you get depressed cuz so many people get into a place of depression because we get in our heads y yeah you just preached let me ask you this real quick CU you talked about a real thing you get 36 years old at 35 doctors telling you you going to have a geriatric pregnancy and so it becomes real with with women who uh desire kids that doctors or gynecologists are telling them Hey listen hey what you know what we doing yeah yep how did you deal with that uh in your pregnancy I mean in your in your marriage you know what um I think I've always felt that there was something that I needed to have some doctors to pay attention to and I didn't really put a lot of attention to it until after we got married so for two years you know we tried to have a baby and it was like okay this is not working I feel you know you feel this emptiness you feel like there's something going on so I went to a doctor in Houston and we found out that I had um a severe case of endometriosis and so the endometriosis was preventing us from um conceiving so we decided hey well let's do whatever it takes to fix it because you got all these prophecies you know everybody saying y'all going to have this baby this baby this baby and we believed it you know and so we went to Houston we would fly to Houston once a month for a year to you know just do the math y'all once a month for a year we would get these injections to clear endometriosis out of my body and when it was clear enough uh we felt like the doctors would say y'all have a window just a window of opportunity just a few months where you can do um IVF and and have an embryo implanted um so we went through with IVF we cre we had one embryo you know one embryo and we implanted the embryo and we lost that baby and so can you imagine I'm thinking okay we have a promise from God I don't have enough eggs to do this again um we lost the one embryo that we have so where is this miracle coming from you know and I feel like there are so many people people and I feel like so many people can relate to this story because whether it's a natural child or a spiritual something that God has calls you to birth some of us feel like we're in a place where we just don't understand like why is this not happening how God said it would happen and I and in my story now I couldn't have told this that way back then because I was so grieved and depressed and hurt and confused but now that I've allowed God to give me Revelation behind it it was God saying saying babe I told you you were going to have a baby but you tried to go do it your way you know and I shared this several times sometimes we hear God's will but we go and try to do it our way and so our way was you go get IVF you go clear out end endometriosis and God is saying but I've already created this human being this beautiful baby boy that I have designed just for y'all but you got to do it my way and so one day Kenny came to me and he said um this was months after we lost the baby and he said babe what do you think about adoption and before I probably would have been totally against it but this time I I heard Kenny sharing the word of God to his wife that this is God's Will and and his way and so we went through adoption and the long story short is we had an agent who after we finished all the paperwork I tell people all the time I didn't go through Labor like every other woman goes through labor but I went through Labor like the processes that you have to go through in order to get to the adoption it's just you know that it mental sometime just thinking is this going to fall through you know when I get a parent is she gonna change her mind you to think of all of those things and so it's labor and so we went through those months of Labor turned in our paperwork and we submitted it to four adoption agencies and she said to us she said you know sometimes this could take 2 years four years and sometimes people never get a baby and she said but we're going to believe God that you've done all that you're supposed to do and now God is going to do his part three days later three days later we received a phone call from our agent saying I don't know how this happened she said it's not even an agency that you uh submitted an application to we don't know how they got your name what but a mother walked into this agency and everything about your profile fits what she's asking for this baby come on and she said um so you it's between you and seven other families and she said it could take about two weeks for her to make her decision and uh she said it take about two weeks for you her to make your decision she said but I really really sense in my spirit this why it's so on good to have people who can hear from God from you for you in Seasons where you can't hear us clear cuz we got to be honest there some Seasons where we don't hear as clear and just to have her there helping to Usher us so gently through this season especially after experiencing the trauma that we experienced to have that person there who cared who understood but also who knew God and she said she she she didn't say this to me she said Kenny I want you to sit and write a handwritten letter to the birth mother and I want you to share with her how this family would be the perfect place for this baby to Kenny and so my husband went upstairs to the office and he wrote out this letter telling our story about our family about our other children and how they were excited to welcome another sibling and the next day she called us in tears saying this has never happened in 20 years of me working at this agency she said the mother called and she chose you guys and your baby boy is being born in four weeks so this whole time we had been in labor we had been carrying this baby it just wasn't the way that we thought it was God's way got my baby boy what was the um what was the uh time span between the Lost of the embryo and the um the phone call that you had how long were and was that you know I don't know the exact time but I would say it was between seven to nine months that's why I felt in the spirit that's why I asked you that I need to get that exact number but I really believe it was between seven to nine months because the process takes six months just to get all the paperwork and everything done so when you add it up that's that's why I just heard in the spirit um and it just shows me how awesome God is how intentional God is the Bible says if you know how to give good gifts as pretty much humans what more do you think your heavenly father can do for you how much more and so when I listen to that especially me being a an adoption and Foster Care Advocate I actually sit on the board for an adoption a agency shout out to Advantage adoption yeah um but yeah these stories right here they hit me differently Jesus because people have no idea about how intentional God is because God knows that you and Kenny have exactly what that child needs and when a mother decides to give up her child and it's not really giving up in that sense it's like the story of Moses like saying listen I believe that it is my assignment yes my assignment because she is just being led by God because you are praying a prayer and she is praying a prayer simultane ly because she knows what she the resources or whatever she has that is causing her to give up the child you're praying a prayer because you're saying God this is what we need in our life and we and it's a prophecy that went forth way before this moment and these prayers are happen simultaneously and it takes two people to be obedient to the voice of God in order for this miracle to take place when I tell you the hand of God the hand of God and I'm telling you and I like when you said that no we didn't we didn't go through a physical child uh labor or whatever but oh we went through some labor cuz people don't know what you got to go through with all that man they start doing they come and and investigate and do background checks and do this stuff and do home studies and all this other stuff and you sit around be like God like Lord Jes it's so easier it's so much easier just to go uh uh take some sperm and egg and have your own kids then take to literally be going back like God do what you think I'm doing oh yeah I mean they you be like y'all just went doing a whole background check andu on everybody in the household you be like good Lord truly which is so necessary it is so necessary yeah but the fact that you had to go through that Y and and that's the beautiful thing about what you'll be able to tell your child is I chose you I chose you I tell them every day yes Mommy and Daddy choose you every day yep ah three years old um had them since birth yep day one how do you feel being a mother oh my goodness it's the most beautiful assignment it is the most beautiful assignment for God to entrust you with a gift like it's his gift and God is saying okay I put all of these things inside this little tiny person that's going to grow up to be a big person but it's your job to cultivate it what God moments you see in him oh so many Ash shows us so much about ourselves for one you know Tasha lighten up just light up it's not that serious you know and he is that he's like such such a comedian he's so wise to be two and a half like the other day I was doing oh I'll tell this one I was getting my nails done and the nail tech has known him since he was born basically and he's he's just now developing of this language sentences all of this kind of stuff and so she sees it every time she comes and it's just getting he's getting better and better at it so ashy was standing there and he was just talking to me just talk talk talking and she was amazed like when did he start talking like this so he stood there he just smirked at her and then he said I can talk he's like such this like that that and it is just it might be minor some people but to me it just teaches me Tasha enjoy life lighten up you know that's what Ash teaches us he just told her I can talk he so he he said I can talk after this is after he laughed at her for being amazed then he said I can talk like this little boy he is just he is his name is ashon and means laughter so every morning he wakes up with this big smile on he lives up to his name yeah aser amarus me and Kenny both so we chose Asher which means laughter and then his middle name uh a gift from God yeah is his mom present I mean his biological mom is she still present she's not uh she's not but you know what we had a great conversation we actually had an opportunity to talk to her twice and I didn't say that in that conversation when she chose us Kenny asked her what was the thing that made her choose us and her response was when I read your letter the baby started kicking and so she said I didn't choose you he did yeah y so in those two conversations that was one of the conversations we had with her y she said I didn't choose you the baby he did do you people don't believe in God let me tell you something you you got to be hard you got to be hard pressed to try to go go ahead make sense out of that go and say oh it's just a coincidence if you want to you try to figure it out only God only there's something things that the answer to that is only God Only God y only God oh my God and and and so for those that are even considering adoption or or uh foster care or whatnot or they just you know they may feel like well that's still not gonna feel like that's my child I want you to speak to that I want you to speak turn that camera and say I want you to eradicate that list I I feel like the fear of the unknown is what uh causes lot of people in our culture to to not pursue it but let me just I'll be a testimony I could not love my baby anymore had I birthed him naturally he looks like me he Walk Like Us act like us talk like us when you do it God's way and and you really sense that this is the way that God wants you to do it I promise you that the gift that he gives to you you are going to love it like it came from your loins I promise you that yep so you got this amazing book that you written yeah what's the name of this book do it anyway why did you name it that oo I'mma tell this really quick I um in 2013 I released the album Grace um that that album was nominated for six Stellar Awards and one Grammy all within a span of seven days and my father was a Down Home Country preacher he pastored the church he started when I was 10 years old this is the kind of family we were we went on vacation from Sunday evening to Saturday so we could be back on to church on Sunday my daddy was going to be the last one in the church he was going to uh turn off the the air and the lights cuz that bill wasn't going to be high he was a Down Home Country Country preacher but the stellers were happening on a Sunday and I was I was trying to condition myself that daddy's not gonna be at the stellers but my daddy showed up to the stellers he came and um that I tell people now that was more of of an award a reward than anything I could have got that night to look out and see my parents in the room and so Daddy was there I won six stellers that night that night he came to we were in Bishop Murphy's room just laughing in the Kiki K and I couldn't believe he was in Nashville and I really didn't feel like he was gonna come at 2 o'cl in the morning to come laugh with us he had us up all night laughing and joking around and then he left at about 4 o'clock in the morning and my father was a carpenter like Jesus so he had built this CUO to put all his baby girls Awards in he believed I was going to win and so my repayment to him for being executive producer on my first album was you get the awards I'm never going to pay you back I'm never going to and so so 4:00 that morning my dad left the hotel room just laughing and playing with us and I saw him beaming with pride he was holding all of my Awards in his hands and I said take one of them out Daddy I'm G snap a picture with you and uh he took it out and he was smiling from ear to ear and he held it up I snapped a picture of him and that was my last time seeing him he went home to be with the Lord the next day and I will I'll tell you this um during that week he would say to me daddy's not going to be with you in LA but I want you to go anyway and so I was thinking nobody expects you to come to La you going to Nashville that's enough and he just kept saying daddy's not going to be with any La was for the gramys yeah I want you to go anyway and that was the last lesson my father left with me that sometimes your heart is g to be broken sometimes you're not gonna understand it and you're gonna be confused but I want you to dig deep in yourself and get up and do it anyway so the premise for this book it came from the last lesson that my dad left with me I know your heart is broken but daddy wants you to go to La anyway and I I won a Grammy that year and that was the same year where nobody knew what I look like but they knew my name and they knew that song Break Every Chain it's the same year that my mother's prophecy came to pass that the most beautiful story heard in my life good Lord JZ absolutely know we just tow up in here God that is so so that's where we got the book from and so it's just full of full of so many stories where I fac challenges in life stories that I can't tell in a song I had to write these I had to write it out yeah yeah mess me up that story is beautiful so you got a picture of your dad it's like but think about in the book can I show you yes please yeah they put that picture cuz think about that think about if you didn't have the wherewithal to take that picture I wouldn't have gone to the Grammys either the only reason I went I never thought I would win the only reason I went and I went upset with him because I was like why did you keep telling me to go anyway go anyway and I got there and then people called my name I couldn't believe it that's the picture of him holding this wow the last picture y I snapped it before he left and he had a heart attack and went to be with the Lord the next day the next day and that's the Grammy I asked the entire uh I asked all of everybody in the gammies to stand up and give my father a round of applause and they did I said seven days ago the greatest man to walk the face of the Earth went to be with the Lord seven days ago how did you feel being up there where did you feel I mean because I know he spoke that word over your life but I know it was heaviness Could you actually enjoy that moment a woman that had a whole it was a challenge celebrating moments even with less obstacles in the way did you celebrate that moment I did not it was just it was just a it was just it a blur huh I was still living in the future one of those moments I felt the weight of the moment and I felt God's strength to be able to stand there and talk about my father and to receive that award yeah but I I wasn't as present as I could have been and the way you know what God orchestrated it so well for me because um like a couple couple weeks before that my father met Ty tribit at a at a conference and him and Ty just kicked it off he came back home saying Ty tripping my best friend my dad was so funny he's my best friend I told T what did you do to my dad and literally Ty was the one who gave he was standing on stage with me and handed me my grammy he announced it so I was surrounded by safety just little glimpses of daddy saying I'm still here with you you know you're safe you can do this Ty was standing right there on the stage with me and we walked off together and Ty just grabbed me yep that's it oh we got two words only God Only God Tasha the um my community we call them the lit fam because on the podcast we live intentionally and transparently and so when we get people that um and that's the reason why when people come on my podcast I don't try to like prom OTE the book or promote their product like buy this buy this buy this they get your story fall in love with you and then support you with everything you got they going to start buying a bunch of your songs people don't even we we just got to support her they just go crazy and support like crazy which I thank y'all so much for y'all being like that people come on my podcast they go what do you have over there I've never even experienced this before it's something different he I've been on platforms all the time I've been on TV I never get this level of influx and I said it's just something that that God trusted me with in order to Foster and curate and I thank God for it but when I tell you we speaking New York Times bestseller on this thing when I tell you we speak New York Times bestseller over this thing the story the heartbeat around this book wow I don't even I I don't even need to go into I know the the talking points your the publisher company sent me all that type of stuff the book is going to be amazing just because it's coming from you but just the fact the heartbeat and the posture of it came from that oh God that that that messed me up that absolutely mess me up and I love it has photos in there so we got photos different moments of what yeah uh different moments that are in the book so Asher's in there our our kids are in there my mother's in there um I talk about I told some stories from when I was younger growing up in church so it has some pictures of little tat TI Little T yeah my brother it has just pictures of that album Grace that won the um Grand and then I did like discussion questions in the back too because I know people have like small groups and I'm just that kind of person some self-help kind of stuff so it's literally the Story of My Life let me ask you this because you just got this book placed in your hand uh that was earlier today oh so how do you feel how do you feel when they place this hard copy in your hand you know anybody that's ever carried an assignment it's like you can breathe yeah like it's something you hold on to this one breath of oh is this going to happen or is there going to be a mistake is it going to come out right is it you know just making up stuff is the PR Company going explode yeah yeah we thinking every worst thing that happen every worst thing that could happen but when they put it in my hands it became real it became real and and it's more the story I just shared like I literally get to put my dad's lesson in so many other people's hands like that's where and I thought about that I looked at a picture of him in there and y'all they had me crying in there with all them people in there I just now he got me in here crying I just oh when you hit 40 something else happened I'm 42 and now I'm just a way 46 I turned 46 a couple weeks ago start crying for reason cuz you cuz you you grown you say you know this is my feelings ain't nobody going to make me feel different this how I feel and so you just own it and you have a different appreciation 100% because you can look back and and remember all that God has brought you through and when you look back and folks used to always say it all the time they like you'll understand it better bye by you like what is by and by we there now we we a want of The Bu and we understand it better you know when you looking back at all this stuff or whatever or they'll say their famous thing you can be falling apart about something that happened they go just keep on living keep on living keep on living you want to hear so much like I'm frustrated about this right now just keep on living and what that means is that when you get to these parts of 30 and 40 and you dealt with heartbreak you deal with disappointments you deal with things that don't work back you look back and be like God if you did it before you'll do it again that's Monument that's them altars you got to look back yeah look back and so man listen as we conclude and wrap up Tasha let me tell you something thank you so much um you giving me a deeper app appreciation of just time and and an appreciation of taking time I remember last year I said I'm a it's a old saying they said uh take time to smell the roses and so I said that you know last year I just stopped and just took time to smell the roses I went to the Bahamas the last year and I was working so much that I don't even remember being in the Bahamas like I I didn't get a chance to chill or do anything and so they booking me to go up to the Bahamas um um this month well may Mother's Day weekend and they were trying to put some a lot of stuff on my schedule I'm supposed to make an appearance out there and I said I don't want to do nothing don't put nothing on my schle I want to enjoy it this is a beautiful country let me just enjoy it 242 to the world let me just hang out and just enjoy it and so that's what I'm doing so I'm being more intentional of sitting down and just smelling the Roses but man that book is going to be amazing make sure that y'all purchase this book blow Tasha's mind it releases May the 7th uh below her mind do they have pre-orders going on they do absolutely everywhere so that's good then I'm going actually release this episode earlier so we can get those pre-orders looking amazing on Amazon or whatnot but um thank you yeah so blessed today for real when I tell you got me full right now like like I'mma cry when I get in the car um because this it just messed me up listen um you have a concert you got going on huh you on tour so let's talk about the tour one halleluia tour Erica Campbell Jonathan MC reyolds Israel hold Holden your kayin Carr I mean it is explosive every night every night you got all my people on that tour all my people all Erica was on my before he still scared to get on the podcast he said I may one day I'm scared J she supp get up every night the women in the room I said all of them think he they husband y'all calm down out there calm down out there you know kayin I did her radio show or what not she been wanting to come on the podcast I said let's make time for that but uh yeah yeah and I'm get Israel and his wife on the podcast soon so it's going to be dope you going to be at to stellers this year yes we'll be at to stellers you coming yeah I'm going do uh they're talking I'm going to do a live podcast recording like I did last year I love it yeah the live was be lit you say lit it was fun it was fun man but thank you thank you for your support man thank you for all that you do thank you for success I know you got to get running uh cuz I see your boy over there looking at watch and so uh he like we got to go y'all can keep talking y'all call each other on the phone but listen thank you so much I appreciate you keep doing what you're doing Tasha hey y'all give it up for my homie Tasha cobs L I love y'all thank y'all stay tuned to the end for a letter to my future wifey writing these love letters to you larian thrusted suddenly into Child Protective Services in 2015 my nephew black a boy the likelihood of been adopted outside of kinship slim to none Armani 16 years old black a boy with 5 years in the foster care system before I even knew his name the likelihood of ever been adopted yep you guessed it slim to none while laran and Armani were trying to survive and barely thrive in an overpopulated and underfunded fossil care system I was living my own life doing well professionally having been a single father with a daughter who at that point was doing well in college it was my time to live my life right wrong I felt unsettled tireless agitated there are just too many of our black children stuck in ambiguity and in the limbo of the foster care system in 2017 I legally adopted my nephew laran fast forward to 2019 I had no tiese to this other young king but I felt God instructed me to adopt him also and I obeyed starting over with parenting should have been enough right working with various foster care and adoption agencies to help bring awareness to the countless young black kings in the foster care system should have decreased my agitation right joining the board of directors of Advantage adoption an organization that helps find permanent adoptive homes for children in falser care should have led to some type of resolve right no not at all none of it felt like I had done enough I now realize that every one of those experiences was laying the fundamental foundation for my life's Mission Kingdom Royale Kingdom Royale will be a luxury state of the art home for foster boys our first location will be in the Dallas Fort Worth Metroplex we will utilize the whole person approach that instills identity empowers them to advocate for themselves and enlightens them regarding New Perspectives and Limitless options that they thought were impossible though the young kings will attend the local public schools that are in proximity to Kingdom Royale our atome curriculum will broaden their world viw through participating in the Arts attending various cultur events learning about and engaging in multifaceted discussions about current events and even relevant historical context introducing them to gardening and Landscaping and even caring for our animals on our farm and on-site Stables we just launched our startup Capital campaign with the goal of raising $2.8 million now why $2.8 million well in 2017 I created a web series in which I performed random acts of kindness for targeting the homeless Community one of the most most notable successes was that one of the videos went viral garnering 28 million views however one of my biggest regrets is that I didn't raise a single dollar to help in implementing a more sustainable plan for the homeless community so throughout the years with much remorse I reflected on not maximizing that moment I knew if at that time just 10% of the viewers donated $1 we would have raised at least $2.8 million that could have really established long-term support for the homeless Community or at least started a long-term initiative to do so this is my doover this is our new beginning together we can attack this at the root by specifically helping our homeless black boys who are already disproportionately represented in the American foster care system I'm lat teras are withfield I've been nominated for three regional emys documenting my work with the homeless as well as my personal op option Journey despite those accolades the greatest award for me is truly providing the infrastructure for a transformed life visit Kingdom royale.com for more details Crown a king and make a donation today wasn't this episode absolutely amazing man what I love about this episode is that it shows God's divine intervention we see his Divine orchestration of his will and we see the the power of surrender a lot of us don't feel or we don't have the heart posture of surrender but when we truly surrender to the will of God then we learn how to abase and how to abound how to live with and how to live without and then that's where God can show up and show out in our lives but man thank you Tasha for uh Grace in the dear future wifey podcast with your story of vulnerability and transparency well here's my favorite part of the podcast where I speak to my future wifey dear future wifey in a world where challenges seem to lurk around every corner I've learned that it's not the absence of obstacles that defines our journey but rather our response to them there were times when the path seemed treacherous and the weight of uncertainty threatened to overwhelm me yet in those moments of doubt and fear I found solace and surrendering to our Lord and savior surrendering to the will of God doesn't mean giving up or resigning ourselves to fith instead it's about acknowledging that there's a greater plan at work one that we may not always understand or agree with but one that ultimately leads us to where we need to be it's about finding strength and faith and trusting that every obstacle we face is an opportunity for growth and transformation I believe that our journey together would be marked by his own set of challenges but I'm confident that with faith as our Compass we'll navigate through them hand in hand together we Face the storms that threaten to tear us apart knowing that our love is steadfast and our bond unbreakable your future hubby I hope you enjoyed this episode of the dear future wifey podcast remember be lit live intentionally and transparently and don't stop loving make sure to subscribe to our dear future wifey YouTube channel we're available on Apple podcast Google podcast Spotify and Stitcher we welcome your support simply share our podcast with your friends and family

Channel: Dear Future Wifey

Views: 171,440

Keywords: TASHA COBBS LEONARD, Dear Future Wifey Ep. 816, Miscarriage to Surrender & Marriage, Surrender & Marriage, Miscarriage, Dear Future Wifey, tasha cobbs this is move, tasha cobbs this is the freedom, tasha cobbsvevo, redemption church, joseph prince, tasha cobbs immediately, royalty, Total Surrender, dearfuturewifey, dear future wifey, black love matters, Tasha Cobbs Leonard Podcast, tasha cobbs leonard podcast, tasha cobbs, cobbs leonard, Tasha Cobbs Leonard Podcast Ep. 816, Tasha

Id: gL7zs9sZ9P0

Length: 83min 6sec (4986 seconds)

Published: Wed Apr 17 2024