Greetings and welcome to Awakening With Brahma Kumaris. Sister Shivani is with us. Welcome, Sister. Om Shanti. Om Shanti and welcome to Living Values. Thank you. Let me read the quote once again Respect people's feelings Even if it doesn't mean anything to you It could mean everything to them. You said that if someone says something unpleasant, then I create pain. I created hurt. I am the person who creates it. Then why should my respect or disrespect mean the world to somebody? Because we now understand that I create pain, I create hurt. When we did not have this knowledge What was our earlier belief system? You hurt me, you upset me. So I was dependent on other people's behaviour to feel respected. Just like I create hurt, I create love, I create peace Similarly I create respect. But here isn't it begging from other people? The line says respect other people's feelings Because it may not mean anything to you, but it may mean a lot to them. It means other people's Sanskars Which we sometimes feel as strange Or even wrong But their Sanskar Was created sometime because of some reason. That Sanskar is right now the reality for them. But looking at that Sanskar we will raise a lot of question marks in our mind. How can they be like this? Let's take for example, you mentioned so many times That you would get angry so often, earlier. This is your Sanskar. Now the other person can say How can someone behave like this? How can someone speak like this? What was the matter after all for him to get so angry? Being an actor and getting so angry, just doesn't feel dignified. A third person will say this about you. Suppose I am saying that. How can I say like that? What was that person's mistake after all, for him to get so angry? Which means I did not understand your Sanskar. I create a lot of questions about why you behave that way. So at that time I am not sensitive to your feelings. But how did such a Sanskar of anger get created in you? How did it get created? How did it get acquired? One is that it is a carry forward from the past. Most probably the chances are That it is a carry forward from your past Second is, it is out of parental influence. Third is the influence of the environment. There can also be someone who has the same three influences, but does not get so angry. But each one will be different. There can also be someone who gets angry without any of these three factors. So it is different for everyone. We are not able to understand the other person's Sanskar. Because we don't have that Sanskar. Let's say I have the Sanskar of anger, but not to that extent. For example, when I met you for the first time When I did not know you and your Sanskar We were just talking to each other You got a phone call from home. It was from a staff or a travel agent. You scolded him very harshly. Now, that kind of anger Is something that I cannot comprehend. That someone gets so angry over such a small matter. Being so loud at the other person. When I create these thoughts Why was he so angry? Why was he so loud? Could he not say the same thing calmly? What was the need to be angry? After finishing that conversation After about 15 to 20 minutes you told me I would get very angry earlier, but now it has reduced so much. So I was thinking If this is about less anger, then how would it have been earlier? Why was it happening? Because although I have anger in me, I cannot imagine that kind of anger. So any Sanskar which we don't have in us And if we see it in the other person Then we raise a lot of questions about it. How can he be like this? The moment I create a thought as, how can he be like this? How can someone be so angry? This is vibration of rejection Of disrespect. Now I need to shift it. Sometime and somewhere In some or the other costume Because of some situation Because of the environment or parental influence Or because of certain circumstances in the present life This soul has created this Sanskar. The moment I create such a thought The thought of why is the person like this, will stop. Or the thought that he should not be like this, will stop. So that the vibrations that radiate from me It will be clean and pure, and of acceptance. Next week and work on it I can talk to you about it. What was the line you thought of? Sometime, in some costume, in some lifetime We understood it because of Gyan that we have now. Sometime or the other, in some costume the other In some situation In some environment Because of some reason Or in this lifetime It could be due to parental or environmental influence There could have been a circumstance in this lifetime And you you faced that situation in a certain way Because of which this Sanskar has got created. Being very loud Having very high expectations from people Rejecting people easily Looking at this I can raise a question as to how someone can be like this. When I create this thought it means a lot of disrespect. The moment I send the vibration of disrespect Whose state of mind got disturbed first? Mine. When I question somebody, my mind itself is not happy. Because I become critical and judgemental. Secondly what vibration did I send you? Rejection for your Sanskar. God has come and taught a very beautiful point of wisdom Because of which it becomes easier and natural to give respect. Some time, in some lifetime, this Sanskar has been created. This understanding makes it easier to accept the Sanskar And most important is that, it is an acquired Sanskar of the soul. Originally this soul is very beautiful. Between then and now, 4 or 5 years have passed During this time everything that we have discussed in the programme I have worked on myself, applying them. I have tried to implement the points in practical life. I try to meditate at 4:00 a.m. every morning. I attended Murli classes every morning at the Brahmakumaris centre And just last week I was shooting for a video I was delivering the dialogues It went on till 1 o'clock and I did not even realise until lunch break. I was so peaceful, though there were about 50 retakes. I was very calm and didn't say anything to anyone. When they announced lunch break, I insisted that say it loudly so that the entire crew can go for lunch. While packing up after the shoot, I gave away the snacks kept for me, to the support staff there, asking them to eat it. And I left the place. Some of the sponsors came to me and said - Sir, it was a pleasure to work with you You even took care of the crew during the shoot, making sure they ate lunch and snacks. Now I realise that what we do can mean a lot to them. Respect other people's feelings. You may not even know how much it means to them. I never knew that because of the Gyan we do good things naturally. I did not have to put any efforts to do it. Why were you able to respect everybody? Although everything there was not perfect The setting was not perfect and the work was not perfect. Still you respected everybody. Not only this, they knew my earlier Sanskar and nature. So they knew your earlier Sanskar also How did it become easier to respect the other person? Because now I the soul have given myself, respect. I have not made my respect dependent on other people's behaviour. Because of Gyan and meditation Having remained stable I the soul have respected myself I have not made my respect dependent on other people's behaviours. Which means I ate my food at my house, so I did not go elsewhere asking for food. We saw in the beginning that we create hurt and we create respect Now our definition of respect is not dependent on other people's behaviour. This is very important. As I mentioned earlier, that in the beginning If I look at your Sanskar and become judgemental and critical And if I forget that original Sanskar of the soul is so beautiful Then I will disrespect you And gradually I will not like you as a person. How can we be like this? It's so difficult to work with him. No idea when and why he will get so angry. How can someone work with him? By creating this thoughts, our relationship with people gets affected Our vibration gets affected Our vibration which radiates to the other person gets affected. We need to change it now. First step is that we will not get disturbed by this Sanskar in them. When we don't get disturbed by looking at the other person's Sanskar We are radiating respect. We can underline this today. When we look at the other person's Sanskar And do not get disturbed We are radiating respect. When we look at the other person's Sanskar and get disturbed. We are radiating disrespect. Lovely lines. When we look at people's Sanskars and get disturbed Which means when we pass a judgement or a comment If we get event slightly disturbed internally Even if I pass a judgement Even if we simply get hurt, upset, angry, or sad internally Which means if we get disturbed When we get disturbed looking at other people's behaviour We radiate disrespect. This disrespect first radiates to the self And then it radiates to the other person. What about disrespecting the body which we have? Wrong eating habits, wrong time to sleep and wake up Addictions like cigarette or alcohol This is deep disrespect for the body. If you disrespect the food and the body They will affect our thoughts also. That if I want to change something which is subtle, then it needs to begin from the gross. But all our attention was on other people respecting us When was our attention on the fact that We should respect ourselves? If I sleep on time If I sleep well then I don't get irritated Managing my diet The soul should first respect itself. Next the soul should respect the body. Third is that the soul should respect other souls. Finally the soul should respect the environment and the universe. We need to respect, value, and appreciate everything. We started with the word respect And we are now discussing about respecting nature. Today we don't often respect nature isn't it? We don't respect resources. Simple things like if water is is flowing from a tap unnecessarily If we do not close it, we disrespected it. We did not respect the resource. In childhood, after removing slippers, we would randomly leave one chappal on one side and the other on the other side. Then we were taught to keep them properly at a side. We were told that they need to be respected because they protect our feet And if we don't respect them, one day we will not find them when we need them. We need to value and appreciate them. Respect means we value it. When we value our car, we say I love my car. Actually we are valuing the car We are respecting it. Even if it is a metal, if you value it, you will polish it so that it does not get rusted. On what basis do we value things? Why do we value them? We have paid for it. It costs money. But disrespecting each other also costs a lot. This is what. We are valuing material objects. That I have paid so much for this car, so I need to maintain, it otherwise it will not look nice. It will give problems otherwise. We are aware of it. If there is an expensive jewellery we pack it velvet and keep it safe in a locker. It should not discolour, it should not get misplaced. We take care. The cost determines its value. We value all this things because they have monetary value. But what about valuing another soul and the feelings of that soul? There is no jail, punishment, and you have not taken any money. We don't feel we are losing anything. So value for the soul Respect for the soul. Something must have happened sometime. That is why they carry this Sanskar. Should we not value them? Should we not have compassion that something has happened with them? Moreover we focus only on negative Sanskars Because beautiful Sanskars don't hurt us So where do we focus on those qualities? What are the Sanskars that we think and churn on? The Sanskars which are uncomfortable to us, are what we think about. For example your Sanskars are caring, sharing Going out of the way to help someone Nobody will comment about that. But if you have a Sanskar of getting angry How much energy are you going to get about that Sanskar, from people around you? Everyone talks about it, that he is like this. It's for those Sanskars. We feel disrespected Or we disrespect other people Or other people disrespect us It is only for those Sanskars. What should we do now? The quotation was very beautiful. Respect people's feelings. They have a reason for those feelings. Sometime or the other they faced certain circumstances Because of which they have this Sanskar today. It has to get fitted in our mind. It is same like physically If I have a cut on my hand, I am not perfect If someone doesn't have the knowledge They will disrespect and say - How can they have their hand with a cut like that? The other person will say - Do you even know what happened to them? How did they have that cut and what happened? Suddenly our vibration will change. They went to save somebody and the process their hand was injured/ They saved a life. Immediately that person will say - Oh, what a great person. This is knowledge. But whether we have knowledge or not, why do we pass judgements? Why do we pass judgements? We forget their original qualities which are beautiful. We question their acquired Sanskars. Only because of one reason. Because we think we have nothing to do with original Sanskars. We are focused on hi, how are you, good morning, very nice... Let's look at this line that we have nothing to do with original Sanskars. We are focused on acquired Sanskars. It is because the other person's original Sanskar are not creating any hurt here on our mind. Your original Sanskar is purity. Love, wisdom. As long as you do your karma through those original Sanskars I am fine with everything. So I don't feel any disturbance. The moment you do any Karma through your acquired Sanskar Suppose you get angry The moment you do a Karma through this acquired Sanskar Looking at your anger I create hurt And when I create hurt, I will have a problem with that Sanskar in you. If I do not create any disturbance in response to your acquired Sanskar Then I will not have a problem even with your acquired Sanskar. It is so simple. We cannot change acquired Sanskars in everyone. But what can we do? In response to the other person's acquired Sanskar If we remain stable Then they will not get any negative vibration from us. So we have respected their feelings and their Sanskars. We cannot have a shield but we can have an understanding It has to happen only with understanding. You had mentioned last time That the girl's mother who came to her house She should have known these things and she should have done these things. She should not have done this... This means we are judgemental towards their Sanskars It is not about being judgemental, but that is a belief in North India. Again we are going back to the same thing. We were judgemental at that time. Why should we talk about North or South India? God tells us that we should behave through our original Sanskars, but we don't do it. Similarly that Sanskar which you believe is right, that soul did not behave through it. It is not about being right or wrong. That is why that line is very beautiful. Respect people's feelings. It may mean nothing to you. It means a lot to them. Which means a Sanskar about which you feel uncomfortable It can be a very natural feeling for the other soul. If someone has a Sanskar of creating hurt We say they get hurt even in small scenes. I just enquired with three or four crew members in the shooting if they had lunch. That's different. This line does not mean that. What is the meaning of this line? Respect other people's feelings It may mean nothing to you It may mean a lot to them. Respect other people's feelings here means I accept you as you are. Suppose I have a Sanskar of greed. Or I have a Sanskar of manipulation I have a Sanskar of speaking lies. I have a Sanskar of crying over small issues. These are Sanskars in me. You will feel how can she have such Sanskars? Because it means nothing to you. But for me these are very powerful Sanskars. So where you feel very insignificant, and wonder how can someone be like that But I have the programming here on my mind. So if you question my Sanskar It means you disrespected me. Respect people's feelings. That if there feeling so hurt, then they may be in some pain. If we look at it physically If someone gets injured Suppose both of us get the same extent of injury You don't feel any pain but I am in a lot of pain. I might even scream out of pain, because I am in so much pain. Then someone can make fun of me Why is she in so much pain? What happened after all? When my grandson falls while playing He just gets up and starts playing again, even if he gets injured. But in some conversation if someone calls him bad, he feels very hurt. He doesn't like the word 'bad'. You said he catches the word 'bad' very quickly Even if someone else is called bad, he doesn't like it. There can be some other kid of his age It will not make any difference to that child if you say - This is bad. That child might cry bitterly if he falls down. That's okay, that is physical. But can there be a child to whom it will not make a difference when the word bad is used? Now we can see that child and say Why should he feel so hurt every time when something is referred as bad? We are finding it strange But that soul goes into a lot of pain when he listens to that word. Now that soul who is 2 or 3 years old Why can't he take in that word? Sometime or the other, he has a deep Karma connected with that word. Sometime or the other, someone has hit him with that word. There is an experience of pain recorded with that word on his mind, sometime in the past. So whenever that word gets used He will feel the pain. This is about respecting the feelings. Someone else can make fun of the child. Saying how can he get hurt over such small things? What was in it to get hurt at all? Which means we are not respecting his pain. Respect other people's feelings. It could mean a lot to them. Even if it means nothing to you. He is only 3 year old child, so you're very easily said There could be some past recording. But if you saw the same Sanskar in that girl's mother You would have question how can she be that way. That despite being an adult, they don't know how to behave. Who has grown? It's only the body which has grown, isn't it? Now that 3 year old child If that Sanskar in him is not worked on Even after his body becomes 30 years old Even then he will feel the pain when he listens to the word Bad. And when he becomes 30 years old Other people will make fun of him, asking why he felt hurt. What did we say to him, after all? They will not be able to understand him. This is where we do not understand and respect people's feelings. For a small child we were able to easily understand. We need to treat a soul with grown up or adult body in the same way. That it was recorded sometime or the other. That is why they are behaving like this. That is why the line is so beautiful. Respect people's feelings It means a lot to them. It means looking at other people's Sanskars We should not get disturbed We should not be judgemental If we remain stable, then we naturally radiate respect. Wonderful, Sister. Thank you so much. Om Shanti. Om Shanti.
