Secrets Of Fergie Vs Diana Relationship - Royal Wives At War - UK Royal Documentary

this is the story of a unique royal relationship the nature of friendship between fergie and diana was quite complex of two women who became the strongest of friends and allies i don't think you can underestimate how close they were but who were also rivals plagued by insecurity and doubt i remember diana saying to me well you don't need me anymore you've got fergie now they appeared an odd pairing shy die they were really chalk and cheese it was always an uneasy friendship that was likely to end in tears they also shared a special connection beyond their royal roles i think a lasting bond between these two women was the fact that they were damaged by the breakup of their parents marriages tonight we asked what brought fergie and diana together diana had an agenda she wanted to see one of her close friends marry into the royal family what kept them close she had quite a set too with princess anne who was complaining about something that fergie had done and diana stood up for her and said her piece and what drove a wedge between them diana would be quite emotionally cruel and if someone upset her she just cut them off royal insiders reveal how in good times and bad they stood side by side they were both plotting to leave their husbands the world didn't know the media didn't know she wanted to give diana the courage to break loose as well which is why she would say you jump and i'll jump too and how the friendship finally faltered donna was absolutely furious if that's how she wants to behave and if she wants to go on television and talk about me she's not going to be spoken to ever again by me ending in tragedy and regret and on the night that donna died fergie was hitting and called her and of course she didn't answer this is the story of fergie and diana the royal wives at war they were members of one of the most famous families in the world sisters-in-law both married to a prince but the unique friendship between princess diana and sarah ferguson began long before they became royals and fergie came from the same sort of area of life so actually they knew each other from when they were about 14. although they had known each other since adolescence they only became close after they connected at a polo match in 1980. prince charles's polo manager was major ron ferguson fergie's larger-than-life father and so they met um beside the polo pictures in windsor and you know they they did hit it and that's charles and sarah was 21. that actually they they became good friends you know friends who lunch friends who hung out and shopped together given their similar backgrounds it seemed inevitable that they would become close well fergie and diana were actually um related they were fourth cousins and their mothers were so close they were at school together they were good friends they were part of the same aristocratic circle when they when they were growing up diana was from a far more aristocratic background than sarah i mean her family had been connected with royalty for centuries sarah's background she always described it i think as sort of a minor country gentry i mean but she grew up on a a nearly 500 acre estate in hampshire both attended private boarding schools and they grew up with similar interests and passions they were both sporty they loved being outdoors sarah was a great horseradish much better on horses than diana ever was and but you know that love of horses extended to polo matches neither of them were particularly brainy or academic they didn't excel at school that said they did well and they were popular the parallels in their early years continued helping to cement their friendship i think a lasting bond between these two women was the fact that they were damaged by the breakup of their parents marriages and unusually for both women uh they were abandoned if you like them by their mothers both fergie and diana's mothers left their families to be with new partners when the girls were still young they were both left with their fathers and more or less brought up by them age six diana was subjected to a bitter custody battle where her mother was forced to give up her four children diana famously um was very uh distraught by the divorce of her parents she was a very young girl when her mother moved out it probably affected her for most of her adult life fergie took the breakup of her parents much more in her stride when fergie was just 12 her mother left her family and moved to south america her mother lived and led a very exotic life she remarried an argentine polo player and relocated to south america and fergie had great memories of traveling there as a teenager and spending time with her marmon and her stepdad on their ranch but i suspect it had an unsettling effect on both of them as diana embarked on her life as a princess she came to rely on her friend fergie diana looked up to sarah because she was so flamboyant and sarah just seemed to be kind of like that older sister in a way fergie had so much more life experience than diana you know by the time she was in her her twenties she'd had two living at that point when diana was very young those two years must have seemed incredibly significant diana was obviously that much younger and she was on the cusp of marrying the throne and if anything she probably sought out fergie for some pointers really because fergie's father was sort of involved with charles on a regular basis i think both girls actually admired things in each other that they didn't have diana wants to be that slightly more devil my care boisterous robust individual that just seemed very comfortable in her own skin and fergie probably wanted some of that rather sweet shy mellowness that diana had at the time diana had a close friendship with her three housemates she was living with in knightsbridge but with the unique parallels in sarah and diana's upbringings and sarah's understanding of royal life the pair soon became best friends when princess diana married prince charles in 1981 in saint paul's cathedral her new friend fergie watched on sarah was actually a very important person in diana's life and in the run-up to the royal wedding and and certainly those early years where she really helped diana to find her feet she was absolutely delighted for her friend and i think that's why they became so close the princess even helped her friend with her wedding outfit fergie didn't have a lot of disposable income um and she knew that um a dress for something like the marriage of the prince and princess of wales was going to be um an expensive proposition so diana helped out by providing her with some fabric and she got a dressmaker to make up something appropriate for her diana intended on bringing her new friend fergie into her royal circle by having her take on the role of her lady in waiting it's not a servant and it's not a friend it's sort of somewhere halfway between it's a genteel occupation and um it's enormous enormous status but the decision was taken out of the princess's hands sarah was told that she was actually unsuitable to be done as lady in waiting which was a huge blow to sarah i think the royal family felt sarah wasn't posh enough diana was persuaded that that basically it was too risky having um sarah ferguson was seen as a loose cannon she was fun but she made them nervous diana was actually quite upset about this but maybe she didn't fight for sarah enough maybe she could have put her foot down more sarah was snubbed once more when royal protocol dictated that could also be excluded from a very key part of the celebrations i think she was astonished to discover that she wasn't being invited to the wedding breakfast um the sort of the aristocratic version of the traditional reception we know for the person that she wasn't invited i don't know whether ever diana realized how her actually sarah was about this the two young women didn't let the palace rules get in the way of their relationship after the wedding the friendship continued to grow at just 20 years old diana was daunted by the pressures of royal life how do you see your role developing as princess of wales but my life will be a great challenge next as diana embarked upon her new role as future queen she needed sarah more than ever but what lengths would she go to to keep her friend in her new royal circle diana had an agenda here she wanted to see one of her close friends marry into the royal family she also wanted a confidant and a best friend inside the palace as princess diana attempted to settle into her new role as future queen aged just 20 she turned to her friend sarah for support dinah found her someone a sounding board if you like someone she could confide in and she found her early months in the royal family extremely trying um she complained many years later that no one really showed her the ropes told her what to do it was either a case of sink or swim if she made a mistake she was made to feel terrible but but there was no there was none of that kind of support where people said look we know it's going to be difficult don't worry if you make a few mistakes but when you're into the royal family there are very few people that you can confide in everybody might go to the newspaper because you're the hottest story in town diana felt that fergie was a safe pair of hands that her secrets were going to be secure with her sarah became diana's loyal confidante they would frequently meet for lunch you know often once a week and if they weren't lunching together at san lorenzo you know they were at the palace catching up over cups of tea she would really lift diana and make her laugh actually which diana really needed at that time [Music] fergie was a cooper diana wasn't a copa and i think diana became dependent on fergie really for that encouragement to believe in herself and they became much closer at that point despite initial failed attempts diana became more determined than ever to bring her friend into the royal circle [Music] well i think diana wanted sarah to be a part of the royal fold for a long time and when she was told that sarah couldn't be a lady in waiting because she wasn't deemed appropriate and she she had to rethink her strategy and uh she came up with the idea um that sarah should meet andrew in fact reconnect with andrew because sarah had played with andrew as a child they mixed in in similar circles he loved the royal ascot week in june and uh she loves to host house parties at windsor castle in 1985 the queen asked diana whether there was anyone she'd like to come along to the house party any single young women perhaps um and dianna thought of sarah fergie and at the back of diana's mind um it was a very cunning plan to make sure that sarah sat next to the duke of york prince andrew which she did by the time pudding was served andrew was sort of being familiar enough with this very bubbly red-headed girl next to him to start feeding her pudding we were made to sit next door to each other at lunch at ascot listen he made me chocolate profit rose which i didn't want to eat at all i then did in heaven so i got hit then it started from there i think andrews soon asked diana if he could bring fergie to stay at diana and charles country house where the pair became much closer andrew and fergie could really be themselves and spend time together without the glare of the press and anyone knowing princess diana had a soft spot for prince andrew as kids she used to send in valentines because they lived nearby to sandringham she saw a lonely young man who needed a girlfriend diana had an agenda here she wanted to see one of her close friends marry into the royal family not only did she think sarah and andrew were very well matched personality-wise which they were diana also wanted confident and a best friend inside the palace within a matter of months sarah ferguson and prince andrew were engaged in the lead-up to the wedding fergie made it clear that fitting in with royal convention was not a priority and she immediately started to encourage diana to follow suit so fergie was the first person to ever have a proper hen party or a bachelorette party to which diana was invited the details were revealed in sarah's autobiography they had a lot of fun they dressed up as policewoman and they caused a bit of a scene um at the palace now these two apparently got put into a police van where the policeman recognized diana and said oh my goodness i'm so sorry and that they all fell in fits of laughter and i think diana had the devilment but sarah was game to do it prince andrew was celebrating his stag party on the same evening with friends including sir elton john the girls decided to drop in diana and fergie gate crashed into annabelle's nightclub where andrew was there they were hiding behind chairs watching andrew little did he know um that they were there and and spying they managed to calm the policeman into shutting the palace gates just as andrew's car was arriving back from the stag night um so he thought something was up and madly put his car into a bus and went whizzing around the victoria memorial i think at which point they thought well maybe we've um royal world for diana this was this was sort of manner from heaven this was you know a whole new world of of sort of spiritual freedom in a way two are better than one so she gets someone like fergie in the royal family too uh perhaps together uh they've got that support as a team to try and change some of the really you know archaic traditions of the royal family [Music] on the 23rd of july sarah and prince andrew were married just six months after becoming engaged sarah's wedding day was in great contrast to her friend diana's and the differences in their characters were clear for the world to see fergie looks like she was born to this wedding giggling looked like she was having fun she i think there was some giant teddy bear even that she went off with in the carriage when she went to her home diana and charles very very formal affair lots of sort of side long glances from diana real real shiners diners had a lot of heads of state and important people because he was the future king and queen who were marrying uh with fergie it was it was a bit more relaxed and you could see that even with the balcony scene where prince charles asks his mother may i when the crowd say give her a kiss whereas fergie's there with her hand capture her ears as they're roaring give her a kiss despite differences in their personalities the two women had established a powerful bond they were now not only best friends but sisters-in-law their lives intertwined more than ever we had our first fab four charles and diana sarah and andrew they seem to get along like a house on fire you know we have these these two couples go skiing together holiday together do engagements together it was wonderful for for the press and diana and fergie were a joy and for the early years at least this all looked like it was going to work very well but royal life for sarah and diana was never going to be that easy the pair had to deal with the rules and responsibilities that came with being a royal wife their lives were not their own anymore they weren't just able to sort of do what they wanted and i think they they both realized after they got married that they had not married into a family they had married into a firm fergie tells very graphically an account of her you know when she first went to sandringham to before her marriage and you know met the queen and all the royal family and curtsy to the queen and tripped over at corgi um she spilled her drink on the safe because she was so nervous and she didn't know how to address anyone so she does curtsy to everybody even for sarah being on the inside of the firm the royal family it was a shock someone would point out that you know continue oh you mustn't do that you mustn't wear that you can't wear those clothes you can't go to that event uh dressed like that also that um you know if someone else is leaving the palace for an event that day sarah couldn't leave before them and it was an absurd list of unwritten rules i understand that diana said i told you it would be like this and sarah said yes bloody awful isn't it for fergie diana's experience was vital fergie came to rely on diana as diana had relied on her sarah certainly looked at diana for guidance and help in the early years of her marriage and early years of learning the ropes of royal life um i suspect that maybe andrew was reasonably supportive but essentially he was away because he was in the navy and for most of their marriage he was at home for only 40 days of the year the princess quickly became the duchess of york's guide i helped um sarah deal with you know being at public events where you can't throw bread rolls around and shriek and get drunk don't say anything controversial and try not to flirt with all the men which was very difficult for sarah ziona's kindness wanting to repay fergie for her support uh really came shining through even before the duchess had become royal diana had been there to support her particularly during fergie's first appearance royal family which caused her great anxiety fergie asked diana to come with her and donna gave sarah all the right advice on how she should um handle herself that day she even provided her with an outfit to wear sarah famously said that at her first role engagement she sort of just looked on in the fundament you know this was completely alien to her and she looked over to diana for some encouragement and diana said to her just just keep smiling and you know that's what sarah did and it stood her in good stead fergie had been able to watch her friend blaze a trail before her whether it was dealing with the press or the in-laws diana was very much the canary down down the mine shaft when it came to learning the royal robes and but more than that learning about royal fashion and sarah she had to do that now she had to be far more groomed far more careful about what she wore sarah finally opened up about this in 1996 when promoting her autobiography on the radio she was my friend and she is my sister and we are still sisters i tried to emulate her and dress like her but when you've got very little confidence you sort of make a nonsense really of everything diana was an old hand at this she'd been married for a number of years she had the two boys she was someone who um sarah ferguson could simply cop safe mimicking diana's behavior because diana was always ahead of the curve it's an interesting revelation about fergie's self-esteem because for all the outward confidence that fergie's got clearly you know even she was struggling with joining the royal family in the early months of fergie's royal life diana even defended her in front of important members of the royal family diana had quite a set too with princess anne who was complaining about something uh that fergie had done and diana stood up for her and said her piece and it was rather brave of dinah that she more or less asked and you've got to give her a break and fergie's good for the family but she's finding it hard to adjust just as i did for diana fergie's entry to the royal fold was a godsend it took at least some of the attention away from her at a time when the pressure was becoming unbearable i think certainly it was a tiny bit of respite and not being in the glare of um you know the public eye the whole time i think probably it was um you know helpful for her sarah became a much needed ally within the family she strived i think the words she used to protect her as a sister and as a friend at all times i mean that was really important for fergie to to stop the firm getting at diana she really was very protective of her she'd stick up for her dana knew that a lot of the royal family didn't like her and she felt picked on by some of the royal members while diana had a head start as a royal fergie had more life experience to draw from well fergie and diner had very different entry points into the royal family freddie was a much more experienced woman she had had a job in publishing she had been very well traveled so she just was more mature she was more sure of herself i think what diana needed all the time was someone to reassure her someone to say it's okay to question to challenge what you're asked to do and how you're supposed to behave it's your life as well as both women attempted to navigate the mounting pressures of royal life and the difficulties in their relationships they also looked for guidance from other sources they both encouraged each other really to to look for alternative therapies to look for healers to look for psychics astrologers people really they're looking for answers to questions about their future astrologer debbie frank was introduced to diana in 1989 and soon became a close confidant diana would just call me as and when which sometimes particularly when we first met was extremely frequently sometimes you know more than once a day what i helped diana with was basically managing her public events that she was attending how they went and then obviously her personal life how things were between her and prince charles diana and i established a very long friendship over the years until her death both women bought into this in a big way and sometimes sarah would consult her astrologer um four times a day it just shows how much they needed an outside influence and support i don't think either of these girls were getting much support from any of the royal family members next it seemed diana and fergie would always depend upon each other but insecurity and suspicion would drive a watch between them diana would be quite emotionally cruel and if someone upset her she just cut them off [Applause] marrying into the royal family brought sarah ferguson and diana closer than ever but the pressures of royal life would ultimately break their bond [Music] the nature of the friendship between fergie and diana was quite complex at times contradictory great rivalry but also intense confidence they were really chalk and cheese but it was that unique set of circumstances of being within royal circles and then in the royal family that made the friendship possible but it was always an uneasy friendship that was likely to end in tears [Music] by the mid-1980s diana had become a global icon but was also plagued with her own insecurities and paranoia even though diana was more used to mixing with royalty and aristocratic people i still think it was easier for fergie diana had said you know i went to lunch at the palace and i was really really nervous but fergie just seemed to take that lunch in her stride underneath it all i suspect fergie probably thought diana was quite weak that she needed her help she was happy to offer it um the focus of attention was on on sarah until then everyone wanted to know all about diana and although her star did not fade at this point greatly nevertheless sarah was the new kid on the block [Music] they called her a breath of fresh air she loved all the things that they loved she loved riding she learned to carriage drive with prince philip she was a very proficient skier she was she was a real country girl she loved dogs and horses so she fitted in really well in the beginning diana was thrilled that fergie had joined the firm she had an ally at court her friend and quite frankly many members of the royal family thought it would help bring diana out of her shell be the moody one and fergie was the good fun frolicking girl who was a breath of fresh air in the family after a rocky start sarah fully settled into royal life the differences between the royal wives stark and the once close friendship showed signs of strain [Music] diana was aware that sarah was a very skilled manipulator of people to some extent because she famously said that sarah had wooed the royal family and knew exactly what she was doing when she said certain things to certain members of the royal family diana was aware of the comparisons being made [Music] she admitted that she got terribly jealous of fergie i think you know the queen and sarah seemed to have an easier report sarah made this forage the royal family look easy when as diana said she herself was was struggling to survive there was a point at which charles said to diana why can't you be more fergie now for someone whose self-esteem is already pretty low who's feeling very vulnerable that wasn't just a rebuke that would have been one of the most cutting hurtful remarks that her husband could have made to her diana did her best to be more fun like fergie one attempted ascot in 1987 was to backfire there was one occasion at royal ascot which they spotted a friend of fergie's in the crowd and they were all carrying umbrellas and they poked her bottom with this umbrella [Music] i mean it's all very funny but the the repercussions were huge and they were both um upgraded for sort of misbehaving in public as the pressure on the princess of wales grew diana's marriage and health suffered the royal family didn't understand diana diana said much much later that she thought that they'd never heard of postnatal depression which she had after prince william was born and you know she was also unhappy in her marriage because she was convinced that charles was seeing camilla and she became obsessed with camilla she was bulimic the queen always said she's like a nervy racehorse and she said treat her with kid gloves later on they blamed the failure of diana's marriage on her bulimia which wasn't really the case at all so i think diana was very much misunderstood she was unsure of herself and she was very emotional and the royal family are not used to people who emote um you don't do that you have a stiff upper lip if you wish to cry then go to your room kindly and do it there uh but diana wasn't asking odds both women were struggling with their royal lives i don't think either of them quite realized how their lives were going to be ruled by courtiers diary meetings protocol doing things correctly both were young women who've been used to a certain amount of freedom fergie certainly used to a great deal of freedom i think there were certainly times and when sarah just felt that she didn't measure up to her she often compared herself to diana and i think there were times when she felt inadequate whether it was that she wasn't as pretty as diana she wasn't a slimstone and she wasn't as loved as diana and as much as they were phone friends there was a fair dose of royal rivalry between the two of them increasingly unhappy in her loveless marriage diana watched the loving marriage of her friend played out in the public arena diana really envied the easy comfortable warmth and intimacy that you know in sexual chemistry actually that was quite clear between andrew and sarah she had a much colder relationship with her own husband i do think at this point diana was really hoping that some of that warmth and intimacy and easy going nature would rub off on her own husband it was a stark contrast to fergie's marriage they were unlike any other royal couple for the first time a genuine affection was public they were a very tactile pair that constantly had their arms and hands over each other and and charles and diana were just not like that i mean by this stage charles and diana were no longer even sharing a bedroom and so there are so many of the intimacies that she saw with andrew and fergie were lacking in her own marriage it must have been difficult for diana to just watch sarah's veg which was such a happy marriage there was diana trapped in a marriage which she felt was was loveless after a while and she knew there were three of them in the marriage and camilla was there and then she would look at um sarah and sarah sarah's husband had daughter prince andrew just adored the way sarah was he never would have said you know can't you be more like diana it was very difficult for diana because she started to get paranoid and she looked at sarah and thought well actually how can i trust a woman that is sleeping with my brother-in-law and everything i tell her she's going to tell him and that paranoia which happened a lot with diana with other people had really set in and she started just not being able to open up and trust sarah anymore the national fergie mania was beginning to wear off inside and outside of the royal family it didn't take long before the honeymoon was wearing off and people rather tired of that exuberance that they'd once loved unflattering headlines in the press in an effort to win back public support fergie took part in a tv game show arranged by prince edward it's a royal knockout will go down in royal history as one of the biggest cock-ups of all time i think it was a disaster from beginning to end it was absolutely humiliating sarah with her usual um gusto entered into it um and you know if she if she gets into something she she does it with bells the best blue bandage there are [Applause] famously did not take part nor did charles he thought it was something that was beneath them in a way it's kind of unfair fergie um took a lot of the blame the flack if you like almost a scapegoat her behavior was being commented on um and i think that is when diana came into her own [Music] danica got the headline the queen of hearts and the people's princess but i think sarah knew she could never be that she could see that in diner from the start how serene she was she looked like the perfect princess she looked like a supermodel sarah is honest and you look i'm never going to be that person she really was happy for her sarah knew her downfalls but knew what she was good at next in public diana and fergie's friendship was masking a private rivalry but over time each became skilled at using their public image to gain the advantage without that determination to keep it going their friendship would have started to sort of collapse [Music] diana and fergie had been genuinely close in the early 80s but as time moved on the friendship faulted well the reason that the friendship failed was entirely diana this is what diana did no one would believe that you could be great friends and do one thing wrong and then diana wouldn't speak to you it was very unique to her diana would be quite emotionally cruel and if someone upset her she just cut them off cut them out of her life the rivalry between them would only increase in the battle for public hearts and minds the press was to be their weapon of choice there was something about dinah that members of the public found utterly magnetic and were drawn to her we're always talking about sarah ferguson as being fergie we would never have called lady diana spencer spency i mean that would just never happened because she wasn't expensive she was not going sporty loud bubbly nature bye i think that this did start the jealous reaction in diner because i remember diana saying to me well you don't need me anymore you've got fergie now i thought that's a strange thing to say um but she really meant that she she felt very sidelined and she knew she couldn't be as bouncy and as fun what we saw in fergie was an over compensation to be liked to be popular that came out in quite a sort of loud and noisy and robust way but underneath that self-confidence it didn't take much for her to feel that her self-esteem had taken a knock while their private rivalry was never seen in public the press reveled in pitting the two women against each other the duchess of york wore a deep pink suit rather courageous for seven months pregnant and the princess of wales has so often won the day in an asgard grey tail coat problem with the press in any situation like this is they love to make comparisons so as diana's authenticity and care grew in stature fergie had to be eclipsed whatever fergie did she was always going to be found wanting creepcakes and sausages she didn't have the capacity to turn heads in the way that diana did fergie tried to enjoy the press attention and it was quite a new thing for her to be the center of attention and she responded to it by overdressing and being over noisy and over-enthusiastic i'll see you later and then of course she became criticized for it in the beginning fergie was incredibly popular but then it all went sour and you can almost date that from when fergie and andrew went to australia on a global mission and they left baby beatrice back at buckingham palace beatrice beatrice just thanks you all for the three cheers and fergie got a lot of criticism for that so as much as they lauded her and loved her they turned against her in a very very unkind way when fergie put on weight they called her the duchess of pork i don't think any member of the royal family has had so much vitriol poured upon them as fergie did at one time the bubble had burst and the once celebrated fergie began to struggle with unfavorable comparisons to diana while diana's found herself and her self-esteem flourished fergie's self has seemed diminished and so that bond that they have that friendship was at her most loved by the public fergie and diana lived life in the royal goldfish bowl public scrutiny added to the pressure to live up to royal standards well there were challenges clearly for both women and i think particularly being in the spotlight and having every aspect of their lives from their hairstyles to their outfits and to their friendship scrutinized in the press sarah seemed to have a thicker skin when it came to dealing with the backlash in the media like fergie diana also struggled with her treatment in the press when fergie was getting all the headlines all the favorable headlines and diana was being criticized for server for her behavior she was mortified and she was very jealous of fergie and she told me that she went for a long drive to a river in the south of england sat down and had a real think about her future and thought to herself i'm not fergie i've got to be who i am diana's relationship with the media was sort of hot and cold found it incredibly intimidating at times as a parent could i ask you to respect my children's space and she was followed wherever she went she also knew that keeping the press on side at this time a very delicate negotiation over her separation from prince charles was vital the media offered her the one chance of sort of evening up this battle if you like the treatment of both women in the press had an inevitable impact on their fragile friendship their relationship blew very hot and cold and this was a lot of this was to do with diana's personality um so you know fergie was in the ascendant and she was in the descendants and then then it turned round again fergie probably knew that you know once people put you on a pedestal there's only one way and that's done the story becomes that you've got this sort of beautiful princess and you've got the sort of almost the ugly sister that's really hard to sustain a friendship between two people when the press for whatever reason uh have taken one completely to their hearts whereas fergie barely got a look in the tables had turned it was a desperate time for fergie her rival was once again the darling of the press the most photographed woman in the world all fergie's demons came back to haunt her fergie has struggled with i think it's probably self-respect actually i think when fergie gets miserable she'll probably comfort eat she'll kind of become a bit reckless the press certainly say that she looks a mess or she looked ridiculous or that she didn't have any taste [Music] the rivalry in private and in public was growing and each would try to out-compete each other in the headlines if there was out on engagements on the same day as diana it was always going to be diana who made the front pages of the newspapers the next day and i think after a while that that probably did begin integrate with fergie and certainly there were times when she felt i can't even compete without that determination to keep it going their friendship would have started to sort of collapse the underbelly of it would just start to sink and the connection between them would have started to break girls were highly competitive and that competition spilled over into newspapers and magazines they were rivals to that extent and they wanted to see their their charities given more space than the others fergie says in her book that she actually did some aids charity work it was for a friend and it was a one-off but diana was furious and she said look that's mine don't interfere which is very typical of diana and fragi was quite distraught because she only done it to help a friend diana was becoming adept at working the press diana earned a reputation for being manipulative because she was aware of her star power she used it to her advantage she would play tabloids off against each other and you know when things got really bad in the war of the whales she would use the newspaper to um to fight her corner and and she did that in a way that um sarah didn't do sarah just didn't engage on that level sarah didn't have newspaper editors over to the palace for lunch um i think it was probably something that she was too scared to do diana really knew how to manipulate the press ultimate example of this is the revenge dress that she wore to the serpentine gallery and that was on the same night that prince charles's dimbleby interview was being shown in which he admitted adultery did you try to be faithful and honorable to your wife when you took on the vow of marriage yes so she showed the world that this is what he's missing diana and fergie have been friends for more than a decade but as their lives took different directions their friendship also changed course so there was this gradual pulling away from diana partly because emotionally she didn't need fergie so much and partly because she was in a very different stage in her life and then time goes on and they just weren't communicating anything next the friendship between diana and fergie had cooled in recent years but a monumental change in their lives reunited the royal wives as common adversaries they were both plotting to leave their husbands the world didn't know the media didn't know but behind the facade of smiles and waves on that palace balcony and there were two deeply unhappy young women after a turbulent decade of friendship for the royal wives the next chapter saw one final heartbreaking rift on the 15th of june 1991 diana princess of wales and sarah duchess of york stood on the balcony of buckingham palace and presented a united front to the world i can tell you exactly what was going on behind the scenes at trooping the color in 1991 that was the last occasion which they were photographed together in public they were both plotting to leave their husbands the world didn't know the media didn't know but behind the facade of smiles and waves on that palace balcony and there were two deeply unhappy young women i think the two of them did discuss very openly the fact that they were unhappy and they did they did discuss the idea of leaving the the royal family which of course is at that point is just a really big line to to cross they'd actually come up with a scheme that they would go together they would announce their separations simultaneously to set off this sort of depth charge if you like under the royal family for now mending any earlier rifts putting their plans into action wasn't going to be easy to enter the royal family is hard enough to leave the royal family to jump out of that goldfish bowl is quite something else it obviously demanded a great deal of courage and planning long long discussions later to the night about what should they do fergie was the one who was leading the way on this [Music] she wanted to give diana the courage to break loose as well which is why she would say you jump and i'll jump too through their public engagements it was becoming increasingly obvious to the world that the wales marriage was breaking down we knew that charles and diana's marriage was a tough one and that they weren't happy i mean from the late 1980s onwards newspapers were routinely recording the number of days and these were growing year by year exponentially i mean they were vast periods of time when they had virtually no contact with each other at the york's family home of sunning hill park it was a simple story andrew was at sea serving in the royal navy it was reported they saw each other just 40 days in a year leaving fergie alone to do what she liked the york's marriage began to unravel and unravel quickly there were rumors that fergie was seeing somebody else the duchess kept her head well down ignoring all questions about the state of her marriage meanwhile diana was continuing to nurture her relationship with the press i had by this stage i've become quite friendly with princess diana and she contacted me and she sent me this message and this was all to do with the devastating series of photographs which revealed that sarah had been cheating on prince andrew but why would diana do this to her one time closest friend i think diana was incredibly skilled she really was like a one girl pr band that knew absolutely how to handle the press and um and how to work it sometimes to her advantage diana's message to me was simply that she'd obviously heard that the photographs were coming we all knew that these photographs were coming it was one of the worst kept secrets in flea street what none of us knew or the rivals to the paper that happened didn't know was just what the photographs showed and how damaging and devastating they were going to prove to be she knew and i suspect she was going to take some kind of precarious thrill from the um the embarrassment it was going to heap onto fergie in the end after all this back and forth fergie jumps first on the 19th of march 1992 the duke and duchess of york had initiated discussions for a formal separation the duchess was an apparently carefree mood as she collected princess beatrice from school just at the moment the official statement was being handed out at the palace [Music] and the ordeal wasn't over yet for fergie very busy patch my patch being royal correspondent jen we need you in the office um not to believe this one but fergie's been found having her toes sucked by her financial advisor in south france can you come in the office i thought oh my goodness me you know do i have to cover stories like this but yes i did and yes it was a very big story on the 20th of august 1992 fergie was at belmoral the annual summer holiday with her children and the rest of the royal family there she was with all the members of the royal family who traditionally um have all the papers laid out at the breakfast table [Music] the scene when she went into the dining room was horrific for her because there were her brothers-in-law um turning over the pages staring at her naked top half of her body [Music] it was excruciatingly embarrassing she then went to the queen and the queen was livid she was absolutely furious with sarah [Music] after her toe curling awkward morning at belmoral fergie made her exit using one of the many side entrances to the royal estate the duchess drove its speed to the airport of aberdeen to catch a scheduled flight to london diana was rumored to have played her part in the timing of fergie's front page story but why it's not the friendliest thing to do but you know if she's desperate maybe she thought that was a sacrifice worth making for her own sanity but diana's tactics to divert the media spotlight from her to friend fergie was short-lived her own scandalous revelation was about to take the heat off fergie we got news that there was a tape recording of a conversation diana had had with a man friend if you wanna be like me you're gonna suffer a man called james gilby was now being released to the papers the so-called squidgy gate story had knocked fergie off the front page the telephone conversation allegedly involving the princess of wales is reported to have been taped on new year's eve six days after these pictures were taken at sandringham in 1989 and rocked the royal family once more with scandals behind them both the friends were now entering a new phase on the 9th of december at 3 30 pm prime minister john major announced in the house of commons the separation of the prince and princess of wales this decision has been reached admittedly and they will both to continue to participate fully in the upbringing of their children both royal marriages were over but had diana and fergie's friendship survived they really did share so much as royal wives as as royal mothers through good times and bad times [Music] next as the former sisters-in-law tried to rebuild their lives danny was absolutely fr and talk about me and the fact that i'd given her baruch diana did not see the funny side of it princess diana and sarah ferguson had a turbulent relationship and it didn't end with their marriages a double divorce marked a new era policeman clear the way for the princess this evening as she leaves a london hotel grim faced 17 million pounds richer it was strange times the settlements that both women got after their divorce of course were very different but then their status was very different fergie funnily enough only ended up with about six hundred thousand but the queen had paid off a lot of fergie's debts beforehand and the queen had dished out uh at least two or three million pounds on fergie over the years unfortunately money just ran through fergie's fingers and the queen knew that she's been accused of extravagance bad taste in an over-exuberant manner of course this played into the bad publicity always for sarah sarah always in trouble in every way you can think of either her behavior or her misbehavior or her finances no longer sisters in law and embracing the single life did they still need each other as friends one of the things that emerged post-divorce for both of them was that fergie represented an area of diana's life she didn't really want to remember anymore and as long as she maintained a friendship with fergie she was always going to be reminded of some really difficult times in her life and so when diana moved on to almost full independence away from the royal family i think fergie would have been quite triggering for diana diana very much became her own woman and the only people she adored and depended upon and had unconditional love for really were her two children she was very self-contained in that way fergie turned to someone surprising for support her former husband andrew became almost what diana was to fergie during her difficult time she'd gone back and redeveloped or reignited that friendship with her husband whereas dinah didn't need fergie in 1996 fergie decided to put her story across she'd watched diana do it in the andrew morton book in 1992 now it was her turn the duchess today in a new york bookshop helping launch her just published autobiography it was very frank very telling it was it's an interesting read quite poignant actually in many places but behind palace gates a storm was brewing donna was annoyed with fergie and fergie hair was promoting her book or in any interviews but of course all anyone in that interviewed fergie wanted to talk about her relationship with diana and there was one particular line the press seized upon danny was absolutely furious about this she really really found that very distasteful if she wants to go onto american television and talk about me and the fact that i'd given her verucas this was related in quite a joking manner in the autobiography but diana did not see the funny side of it fergie's attempted humor backfired and further damaged her already fragile relationship with diana when you've got a friendship that's already imploding it's collapsing it's disconnecting because you're not really in touch with each other uh a lot of friendships like that will just fade away but then someone could take a decision say okay i don't want it to fade away i'm gonna do something dramatic and do something that will ensure that it has a clean break that that person won't want to be my friend anymore the line however it was intended proved disastrous she felt betrayed in short and she rang her up and she said look this is your book not mine and diana after that refused to take um sarah's calls refused to see her [Music] it was a massive overreaction from diana but it wasn't all together surprising to me i knew her very well at that stage um she felt she was juggling a new life she was trying to find a way forward she thought that they they trusted one another they had an agreement they didn't they didn't tread on each other's toes was how diana put it to me and here was diana having her toes trodden on by fergie with sort of outsized big boots on part of the complexity of diana's personality was that she'd fall in and fall out with people all the time diana felt that fergie let her down and she could no longer be trusted months later it's thought diana did reach out via a mutual friend she had asked someone where's the redhead because she used to call it the redhead so i think there was a glimmer of hope that perhaps the ice was throwing but any hopes of reconciliation would never be realized we have reports from paris the diana princess of wales has been killed in a car accident on the day that uh the news was given to to fergie as it was to the rest of us that diane had been killed in that car crash um she was undoubtedly devastated on the night that diana died fergie was in italy and called her of course she didn't answer fergie was trying to hire a private plane to fly to paris to see what was going on peggy again i know they would have done and i know it would have all been forgiven but it was very very painful for fergie to have you know like her close close friend die so tragically shortly before diana died she'd spoken to me about sarah she always referred to her as the redhead she always wanted to know what was going on in her life i felt that it was an indication that perhaps diana was ready to resume the friendship and i think sarah would have grasped the opportunity with both hands she called me actually a day or two after diana's death and we spoke on the phone and she was very tearful the conversation was very much backed up in their own difficulties the great sadness that had come between them and how she regretted it all the one person within the royal family who understood her better than anyone had gone and so i think it was a a huge and profound loss for her when diana died [Music] diana's death sparked days of extraordinary public grief and brought to a track end one of the most compelling chapters in the history of the modern royal family i think it was very important for fergie to have attended diana's funeral she would have felt so desperately sad for her boys so desperately sad the body of a princess so loved by her people leaving the sanctuary of the chapel royal in james's palace on its way to rest one last night in kensington house i think if diana was around today she and sarah would definitely have gotten over veruca gate um and i think that would still be a firm friendship you know after all they went through so much together i don't think you can underestimate how close they were and how unique their lived experience had been you know they had shared something really really unique and special and traumatic at the at the same time ultimately these two women had shared an enormous amount together and a unique experience together so few people know what it's like to marry into the royal family to be transported from being an ordinary person to a princess or a duchess and all that goes with it [Music] their husbands the world didn't know the media didn't know she wanted to give diana the courage to break loose as well which is why she would say you jump and i'll jump too and how the friendship finally faltered donna was absolutely furious if that's how she wants to behave and if she wants to go on television and talk about me she's not going to be spoken to ever again by me ending in tragedy and regret and on the night that donna died fergie was hitting and called her and of course she didn't answer this is the story of fergie and diana the royal wives at war they were members of one of the most famous families in the world sisters-in-law both married to a prince but the unique friendship between princess diana and sarah ferguson began long before they became royals and fergie came from the same sort of area of life so actually they knew each other from when they were about 14. although they had known each other since adolescence they only became close after they connected at a polo match in 1980. prince charles's polo manager was major ron ferguson fergie's larger-than-life father and so they met beside the polo pictures in windsor and you know they they did hit it and that's charles and sarah was 21.

Channel: UK Documentary

Views: 295,282

Keywords: Queen, PrinceCharles, PrincessDiana, PrinceWilliam, Kate, PrinceHarry, MeghanMarkle

Id: cbS6s8xK2-Y

Length: 61min 46sec (3706 seconds)

Published: Sun Nov 07 2021