r/MaliciousCompliance - It's A Fine For All Of Them! No... just the ones with those signs.

welcome to our slash malicious compliance where we share stories of people conforming to the letter but not the spirit of a request and today we have three good stories so subscribe click the like button and here we go the first story is military malicious compliance I'm a long time lurker here and I thought I also might share a story sorry English is not my first language please feel free to point out mistakes we have compulsory military service here in Austria and about 20 years ago is my turn to serve my eight months so any military details are useless as of today as many things have changed some basic information needed to understand the story to be allowed to enter the base you had to have your military identity card to be allowed to stay out during curfew 12 a.m. to 6 a.m. or to leave for the weekend and come back Monday morning you required a special permission a so called uber site shine literally overtime permission recruits with their own car who wanted to park inside the base needed a parking permit the I'm still gonna Meighan now to the actual story I was assigned to a unit in our largest military base a former US Army camp created after World War two with place for up to 3,500 military personnel the base is located on the outskirts of the city of Salzburg near the airport in the German border next to a much traveled Autobahn highway back then the base had no explicit guard unit guard duty was rotating between the different units so every unit of the base had several turns per year so one week before my time in the military was over I and several other guys from my unit were selected for guard duty from Sunday to Monday we were not happy about it because we had duty on Saturday also which meant that most of us wouldn't be able to go home for the weekend well orders are orders there was nothing we could do about it so in the evening we started our guard duty a night on guard duty is long and mostly boring and gives you much time to think about different things this night I remembered an urban legend / rumor regarding the base sometimes brought up when goofing around if the guard at the main entrance enforces all the rules to the letter he might be able to create a traffic jam on the highway well I was the guard at the main entrance I had the morning shift it was Monday morning I was still somewhat peeved about the missed weekend I thought if they want me to guard the entrance I will guard it to the letter malicious compliance mode on the basis on the one side of the Autobahn the city in the airport are on the other side there's a two-lane road connecting the base entrance with the city the own and off ramps to the Autobahn or directly in front of the base forming two crossing with the aforementioned road a little ASCII art as illustration six am rolled around and traffic started slowly trickling into the base the first cars arrived and I got into full compliance mode usually if there was a car full of recruits you check the military identity card and if one guy didn't have his card ready and you knew some guy in the car well and you go not this time there are four people in the car I got to see for identity cards for permissions for coming in late the uber site shine and 1/9 still get an Emmy gunk for the car you don't have it ready it's somewhere in a bag in the trunk well fetch it no permission for the car turn around and park elsewhere I took all the papers in my hands checked if the faces matched check for matching names in the permissions correct number plate on the car at around 7:30 a.m. I had just four cars queued up and thought well the rumor clearly was exaggerated oh boy I was so wrong while I was focused on checking the next car in the queue had to fetch the papers from the trunk something happened the next thing I noticed was honking a whole lot of honking and as I looked I saw a massive queue of cars is formed and was backing up the ramps onto the Autobahn and another queue backing up in direction the airport in the city holy F as soon as the first cars blocked one crossing it was a matter of two to three minutes to a full-blown traffic jam few minutes later everything was blocked by cars wanting to get into the base people who wanted to exit the Autobahn to drive into the city or to the airport couldn't do it because the people wanting to go into the base were blocking everything also the people couldn't leave the city because the traffic jam prevented them to getting to the ramps onto the Autobahn suddenly the officer of the day ovt a Vizier vom tog comes running out of the guardhouse shouting what are you doing you can't do enhanced security checks now it's Monday morning he noticed because he was listening to the radio and the radio traffic service had mentioned a traffic jam at our base well then something happened I will never forget the ovt placed some guards on the first crossing inside the base had to stop all traffic which wanted to leave the base then he made us open all the boom barriers even the one usually reserved for big trucks we basically created a three lane one-way into the base I stood there mouthed the gate looking at the ovt who waved his traffic paddle like he was trying to impersonate a windmill he looks back to me and the second guard and yells don't just look wave them in all of them now so we wave them in all of them among them my company commander in several sergeants of our unit the look on their faces were priceless it took nearly half an hour until things settled down but then the fun began again this time from the inside of the base we got all sorts of frantic tourists asking for the German border mostly Italians but also some Germans all they could find were people in uniforms and fences all around and no way to Germany well we very politely explained to them that we were a military base and not the German border the best thing is no one reprimanded me for that little stunt not the ovt not my company commander but sometimes I still hear the rumor that once upon a time a guard caused a traffic jam just by following the rules the second story is you can stand for one stop okay all right so this happened just under two years ago while I was living in NYC I was an am on the younger side of what the public expects to see for a cane user and other than having the cane I don't look disabled also just because I know it's going to be asked I have the cane because of hyper mobility issues that it basically led to my joints not functioning as they should essentially it helps keep me from falling randomly or over straining my already taxed muscles also those of you who have ridden on NYC subways might already know this but every NYC subway car has seats that are designated as handicapped these seats are to be vacated and given to anyone disabled elderly pregnant injured etc you can definitely sit there if you aren't handicapped in some way but it's a fine if you don't give up your seat when someone who needs it comes along there's actually nothing other than manners forcing you to give up your seat in the rest of the Train that said even in NYC most people tend to automatically offer up a seat when they see a cane NYC subways are especially brutal on my condition if I have to stand the constant unpredictable need to shift my weight leaves my muscles in agony after even a short ride I always tried to board by the handicapped seats that way I at least was and putting someone out into the regular ones a lot of folks will pretend not to see you but eventually they realize you caught them staring they offer up the seat one day I got on the a train at Columbus Circle heading north after a long day of work the train was pretty crowded and every seat was full a guy sitting in one of the handicapped seats saw me and jumped up the young lady's standing in front of him hadn't seen me and sat down this happens sometimes women assuming they were being given the seat by a chivalrous man but most women would see me and realize what had happened the lady saw me just as the man gives her a WTF look I hadn't planned on saying anything cuz I mean invisible disabilities are a thing and I tend to freeze with confrontation anyway but I must have had a puzzled look or something because the lady goes someone else can give you a seat I look around every other handicapped seat is occupied by someone who obviously needs it elderly pregnant etcetera so I just say well they're all people who are supposed to be sitting in these seats it's a fine if you sit here and art handicapped while someone who is doesn't have a seat I was still tired and a bit startled to be pulled into a confrontation lady well then it's a fine for all of them she points to the regular seats me no just the ones with those signs I point to the sign directly above her head declaring the seats are handicapped lady well you can stand for one stop now I could have probably gotten a regular seat from someone nicer than this woman but the subway had already started moving at this point and I needed to hold on that and well I'm stubborn and petty so I stand in the crowded car right in front of her my cane an inch from her kneecap for the Express trip from 59 through 120 v those of you who have experienced the joy of an express NYC subway train ride you know they're not gentle they speed along bouncing swaying and jostling without a care in the world I'm in agony in no time flat but I'm not the only one every jerk of the subway car sends my cane hard into this lady's kneecap I don't have to intentionally do anything more than stand there actually I'm trying to stay as immobile as possible but this particular operator is driving like he's late for his own wedding she tries to shift but I really am all up in her business grab bar is right above her after all we get to 120 v and she tries to stand but I don't move she did want me to stand after all she eventually shoves past me up out of her seat I'm fine cuz the car is too crowded for me to follow anything but doesn't make it out of the car in two I'm by that time I've gratefully taken the seat she vacated so she has to stand until we get to one hundred and forty fifth at that point she got off I assumed to get on going the other direction and I never saw her again edit I guess it's not clear in my post but I'm a woman to know if that helps it hurts the mental image of events and the last story is you can just use the offices Wi-Fi or alternatively how to attempt being a Chad and cost your company thousands of dollars long time lurker here first time poster hopefully it fits my work involves me having to install hardware and all of my employers assets this makes me fairly unavailable for all my other responsibilities but it only happens on occasion so it's normally no big deal it only gets costly if I'll be away for extended amounts of time as it so happens we acquired another project a couple states away in New Mexico so I needed to go on site for a week or two to get all the assets in line I Drive the 14 hours to get on site and arrive on a Monday only to find out that my cell provider has no towers in the area so my phone is effectively a high-tech rolodex I tell them I'll need them to pick me up a little prepaid phone on whatever network works best in the area I'm not picky I just need a crappy $100.00 phone for the next two weeks they tell me they'll have it waiting on me in the office Tuesday morning the thing about my job is I typically answer to no one besides the owner of the company I know my job inside and out I know who I need to talk to you whenever I need something and I'm d good at what I do I'm not a complete a but I'm used to my employer giving me whatever I say I need because they know that if I want something there's a reason for it enter our problem the project lead for this project moved over to my company when we bought the project out so he feels like he has something to prove when I arrived on Tuesday morning I asked the supply tech for my new phone he twirled his thumbs a bit and tells me he was instructed to tell me I need to talk the project lead I thought this was odd but figured maybe he just wanted to introduce himself I enter his office and my first impression is that this might be the smuggest looking pea I've ever met I've long learned that my first impression is someone is usually accurate so I mentally buckle down and prepare for an SH fest he skips over introducing himself I assume because he's so important I should have read his autobiography at some point and immediately jumps in you the one who wanted a phone I not an affirmation and before I can speak he dodged back into his monologue no one else around here gets a phone don't know why you think you're special if you need Internet you can use the office Wi-Fi rather than wasting my breath explaining things I decide that I just shrug and say okay whatever you say here's where the malicious compliance kicks in whenever I'm on the location they get billed by the main office for all my time supplies etc this all comes out of their bottom line but I usually work quickly so it isn't too bad the thing is the assets I'm installing Hardware on are about 45 minutes away from the office and I have to ensure each one is activated before I can install the next one to ensure there are no errors with the integration this means that instead of just activating them for my phone and troubleshooting on the spot I have a 45 minute drive in between every step of my job my job now goes 45 minute drive to a set location install hardware 45 minute drive to office activate if activation works another 45 minute drive to do next asset if not then 45 minute drive back to troubleshoot which hopefully works the first time but can easily take more trips long story short this turns what was originally going to be a two-week project into just over six weeks my time is not cheap nor is my equipment the increase in cost to his project was around $14,000 once you factor in my pay in the fuel costs then add however much the extra four weeks of paying for me to stay at a Holiday Inn Express costs I never saw this bill so I didn't factor it in but I assumed it was around $700 a week that brings us up to an extra seventeen thousand dollars that would have been the end of it but main office was not happy about this as me not being available except for by email at night or when I was in the office caused them tremendous difficulty in the extra month I was absent they ended up back charging his project for every cost that had come along due to my absence which totaled just under $60,000 so now his project is being hit with almost eighty thousand dollars in charges all because he wanted to flex his authority and deny me a phone which would it cost a couple hundred dollars that would have been the end of it but then I'm told this morning that our newest project lead is being let go for wasting resources thank you for watching bye

Channel: Slash Start

Views: 47,951

Rating: 4.922358 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, comedy, funny reddit, reddit stories, reddit posts, reddit cringe, maliciouscompliance, /Start, malicious compliance, reddit MaliciousCompliance, r/maliciouscompliance, malicious, compliance, reddit story, funny reddit stories, storytime, reddit top post, employee, job, boss, r/MaliciousCompliance Manager, ATOMIC KAREN, r/MaliciousCompliance KAREN, r/IDontWorkHereLady atomic karen, karen, Fine, r/MaliciousCompliance Fine

Id: nitLfUeCMJ0

Length: 13min 15sec (795 seconds)

Published: Tue Mar 03 2020