Paul Gascoigne on Addictions & Abuse | Phone Hacking Scandal & The Truth About Sir Alex Ferguson

the biggest failure was like taking that cookie and 18 years ago and i became psychotic it was horrible i wanted to die to be fair when was your last relapse yeah ages ago and i've been sober for five years paul you said that the press were [ __ ] bastards yeah they kept them writing lies about us and i didn't like that i knew i was getting hurt how did you know it was a son 12 years so we've just paid us 870 000 nearly a million damages where would you rank yourself among england's best ever players best would you regard your career as a success yeah yeah shout out one of the most expensive players ever people don't pay that much money if you're [ __ ] you're not hi it's rob moore here and welcome to disruptors you are about to see an interview with the infamous paul gascoigne or as he likes to be called gaza he talks about injunctions and harassment and phone hacking from the media even how much money in damages he won he ranks himself amongst the best footballers in the world his addictions his battle his wrestle with cocaine this is open revealing and there's no question that gaza wouldn't answer no one knows the real paul gascoigne you are going to love this but before we get into the interview make sure you like this video subscribe to the channel and turn the notification bell on gaza was it important for you to be loved by the fans um even just growing up but at school you know i've gone well with everybody i loved going to school and i just think from you know being a footballer and that helped a little bit but you know you talk about being loved and i think it was more when i got back from the world cup and everyone just seemed to love us you know apart from the press that followed us and telling lies enough but yeah it's nice to be loved you know um but i'm quite fortunate i think it's because years ago when i become the footballer and my dad went famous now when i was only 17 or something this is just remember where you've having come from this is never changed so i'm i've never changed you know i don't like you know even when they when see the pope rings up what she did you got gaddafi's you've got george clooney's or limbering you open that and it didn't bother us i just told them it's normal and so you know i've just never changed anything you know i just i know it's lucky to be good when we feed and but i'm just like one of you you know i can't i don't know how to change so you know i just love everybody in the world you know i don't have any nothingness and against anybody you know um so yeah it is you know and sometimes it's i mean i've never turned down an autograph or a selfie ever and so sometimes it's hard if i'm like seeing shopping and want to be just in and out somewhere and getting stopped every 50 yards or whatever you know um but yeah it's nice to be loved yeah you said you enjoyed school a lot of people didn't enjoy school why didn't you i think because i went to a different school than me my sister my two sisters and brother because of the the football thing but i don't know i just i just you know i just i just loved i loved going to school i was already in maths and english and environmental studies was like haunting and up and i just loved it you know um i think he's like pe lessons the teacher should let me keep the pe lessons it's pretty i remember this is paul exams you're not interested in clubs he says look i've got to do the markets will you take the payee unless it's different okay so it was like a class about 20 but these was like posh guys were brainy so it says okay lads i'm taking the lesson today come on double warmup there was a lesson for half an hour i made them warm up for 29 minutes and played basketball for 30 seconds okay finish now go to work go back to school i mean that was funny but yeah i don't know i just love i love going to school you know i just loved it yeah and then obviously i used to dribble like get me get me football i used to dribble the ball all the way to school and dribble all the way back you know yeah i just i just love school were there any um of the fans that you played for you know newcastle spurs england wherever that you loved the most and you thought loved you the most no you i mean you talk about england now they saying for instance i always use him as an example like gary neville he plays for england you know he's got his money native fans so when he got the ball like maybe awesome fans can hate him give him stick or another player i was fortunate when i played ring and all the fans just love is from every club uh so you know when you when i remember that time in the year 96 holland when he got like 90 thousand and five minutes ago saying one paul grassley i feel like crying now thinking about it and david plowed give us the ball and he went and saw the game did you cousin she was i was looking like that and like the fans gave a stick during the game but i just i bounce back it makes me you know i always say like you know maybe 30 000 people upset one guy but one guy can upset 30 thousand by putting the ball about the net but when the game's finished when i go into town and that's all like oh god we're here to do that game because you scored but we love you anyway so i've been fortunate in that way and i think that is i think it's just because i'm just like never seeing them no not one of them you know paul you said to jim rosenthal that the press were [ __ ] bastards yeah um i think this was around italian 90. so um what were they doing to you to make you feel would save me mom and dad's house and cause i mean talking about six cars just waiting taking four doesn't mean mom and dad and i didn't like that i mean i hated that i've seen him knock a few out really oh yeah seen them out um and then it was like there was just right now you know so it only happens in england in america once you're famous and famous for life anywhere else in the world in england it's brilliant become famous so once a famous i'd say this they're gonna knock you down so it was like loads of lies and that they kept on writing lies about this and you know i didn't like that you know um people like remember once i was walking up the high seat once and the woman looked at us and they sort of nearly fainted and i said you already went yeah she's just you know in the newspapers you titled it yesterday i went developed it so and then i looked and i went to catch a test you know before never stops so i'm choosing my number but 55 000 times but um yeah they're just they were just hounders all the time you know and i wouldn't leave us alone you know followers everywhere in london wherever i went hacking me phone um i've just won more damages from them but um yeah that time and i just recently went for the last four years ago or three years ago there was two photographers sitting outside my house 24 7 today and the police wouldn't even help us and i will even drink outside my door and i'd pick up the drink if we wouldn't throw it in the painting hiding the bus the teeth which doesn't take as it's drinking again yeah which it wasn't true and then i lose work through it but i went and put it in in junction on them you know so some of the stuff that we're writing which upset me mom and dad as well you know yeah what what would you say they wrote or which lie was the worst um oh god loads of them um one was when i had this job probably thirty thousand boat and i'm wearing the sitting on the bed all ready to go and do this job but now i lay it down i'm thinking where's this guy so i rang him up and says wait a minute this is an hour ago he says oh we've just read in the papers that you're in rehab in spain and about to die however so i looked at the paper and said this they wrote that so obviously no i'm sitting waiting for you i lost jobs like these were the jobs i was losing you know yeah so there's them sort of lies you know writing stuff like that um it wasn't very nice yeah well i'll tell you what paul let's celebrate your football career first and then maybe come back to some of that stuff so first of all of all how's football changed since you were a player stop i mean when we played them i mean it's all different i mean we you know for instance when we when a player match or rebuild you all together all the players come on guys come on let's win today not you see that now our generation players now all like going to their games with headphones on and they don't talk to each other all listen to their own stuff their own music you know like when i when i scored even a friend that celebrated you see some of the england players when the school didn't even celebrate and forget these people that took three kids to the match and didn't finish the match and 10 o'clock at night at wembley's here and of course they've been fortunate and the players don't even celebrate the goal so things changed in that way um [Music] definitely the money and the money you get i mean you get some mediocre players which are not that very good on a hundred grand a week and you think wow and there's some better kids i mean look at them i've seen it go i was unbelievable i've seen it was um it was a picture about 10 years ago it was a fourth division team and vardy and um gareth bale were on the bench for the fourth division team and look at where they are now you know so there's players like that but they're not giving a chance you know i just think there's too many we call it the english premiership it's not there's not many english players in it no you look at all them top teams they're all foreigners awesome foreign man city foreigners liverpool foreigners there's not many many um english players giving the chance opportunity you know and you you think more should be yeah definitely yeah do you think we're growing enough talent here well you know we've got these academy things and i i don't like these academies and what they are because like imagine being a nine-year-old when you're at the academy and you're getting tall at the end of the year okay you're not good enough at nine years of age and like the kids are not too bad it's the parents it destroys the parents thing well he's only nine and so these some of these kids then get disarmed and i just didn't want to play football anymore when i played there's like two jumpers that goes and you know just kicking a ball about a tennis ball um and then obviously you get a little a lot of the players like refuse to do autographs for people i didn't like doing that seeing that selfies now i'm busy i'm busy really winds me up you know so a lot a lot has changed you know i think some of the a lot of players are more big-headed than they should be i think they're better than what they actually are you know what do you think makes them big headed i think the money they're getting the money they're getting and all that but they've got to be careful because they will get up and comes by the press will eventually just nail them you know they've nailed a few and that's just how you handle it you know i didn't handle some of the stuff very well you know obviously ended up in treatment a couple of times but i've been alright for a long time now i'm just trying to just just try and do the things i like doing like fly fishing i took up golf which i'm not too bad at tennis so i've got each of us for tennis eat for badminton eat for table tennis even one for attempting bull and so i love my sports stuff um so yeah i still miss i still think i'm playing now but obviously i'm getting on a little bit but i miss football really badly i can't watch it anymore really yeah it was so funny because i was at the garage yesterday getting some sweets important part and [ __ ] and the guy comes up and he says she said who do you think he's going to win the league then so i went to him so funny i went i'm not says didn't really watch football i said who's top of the league at the moment and he just looked at it he went well i mean it was top of the league and when the league hasn't started it i went oh [ __ ] sorry midge i walked off and i went has the league not started yet i said who won the league and he went man said he went out to the all right there's this left that he bought the way the guy was like [ __ ] absolutely what we stole about i knew i was getting hurt how did you know right i'll call you up hi how are we doing bang we'll get cut off and then so now they know they've got your number number they're ready now recording next time i call you it's perfect they're recording it was a son 12 years so we've just paid us 870 000 wow nearly a million damages yeah see i find it hard to watch why or something just because i miss it i see like bad players and not let them really give and then sometimes i went to the game and i leave after 20 minutes i think oh can't watch this [ __ ] crap and this is pretending i'm going to toilet next thing i'm going to the taxi jumping attaching away where are you guys i'm just um this is the toilet still you've been away 45 minutes okay i'm in the house yes but i've talked to katie and her husband and her little sons took a couple of games man and i did these likes yeah so like liverpool talk to them and not to a few games which sorry i get to say brian ups and stuff like that because when i played football i didn't really mix with the footballers i just stuck with me you know which sometimes was a good thing and sometimes it wasn't a good thing but um yeah but now and again i text them i guess it was good to see dave seaman again i had a good laugh talking about the the old times you were 96 and that you know and why didn't you really mix with the footballers um because they couldn't keep up with me in the pubs and could couldn't it was sorry it was so funny because i just said i don't know how why but to see one football i want to go with another football and go out clubbing or whatever a girlfriend said no you're not going out there but any of the guys that wanted to go out with me the way to say go go go get my gaza because they knew if we were messing up with the girl the paparazzi would be there taking quarter and they're getting kneeled so they really said well i'm going up against her should we kind of get followed by the press says come on we'll be all right no this is because if a girl comes up and starts talking to us and i'm [ __ ] pressing for that i'm in trouble i'm gonna get divorced okay leave it yeah so the place is that the players go with me that's a bad thing to do but yeah they're not just i think because i i've seen them every day for training you know morning morning night and then obviously on a saturday so so now he's just got the little problem play darts with a couple of mates and pool you know and all the work men's club playing dominoes with the old fellas i still love that yeah yeah that was that's me you know [Music] yeah who would you say is the best player you ever played against brian robson really off yeah i used to i call him dog [ __ ] because he was everywhere on the pitch basically i played with and best player against what a player i mean he come back from three broken legs broken collarbone and it was just when i played for england first game and he went guzzle doesn't i'm getting on a little bit you're starting your career with england let me go for all the challenges in the i'll take the cuts and all that this isn't any challenges i'll do with the chances for you you just get the ball and do the rest for somebody like that as a england captain and an idol and a legend to see that to me was fantastic you know i remember when i was 17 played against man united and then they got apparently brian robertson scored apparently and he wrote pastors and i went be apparently brian anyway you [ __ ] kids but you're not about you get beat one little though i wouldn't yeah but you're my evil so yeah i've met them i've seen a few times those texas here i am i went over he said what was possible and the theater about his lifestyle was incredible yeah were a player energy as well what you know box the box incredible and his timing was fantastic but yeah what a player you ask anybody which modern footballer do you think is most like you and why well nobody really no one's going to be like me but they said greedless but nah i'd be curious playing footed but agreed us is gonna be a good player he always wants to be in the ball which is good what he's got to do is tidy up a little bit from please with where he sucks he wears his socks looks smart you look smart you play small you know um but he's he's a good player he's doing well we've got brass but i like rashford yeah you know they've got a couple garfield's lucky well he's not lucky but he's um he's ended up being like you know like monday night when the world hadn't really won anything and all of a sudden it would bring on backs schools boats gigs nibbles all like that so all of a sudden garth wiegel's got all these class young players and he's brave enough to give them a chance just gotta make sure they didn't take the advantage of it and you know anything i'm playing for england yeah yeah you know which couple of them have dropped themselves in it and end up like in trouble of you know got girls around the rooms and stuff like that which is disrespectful yeah they're actually calling um phil foden um the new gaza yeah what do you think about that he's a good player you won't be the new gaza but he can be fulfilled but he's a good player though to be fair yeah i like him he's good his energy is incredible yeah what's called he is a bit like me he regards and fears even frightened to take on people you know i see a lot of players that i'm frightened just all it does is pass the ball and said go for it and try he goes [ __ ] gives us a go yeah i like him he's a good player i really i don't know who's going to be the next cousin on this show we've had john barnes matt leticia paul merson coming up and paul gascoigne how would you rank those for first to fourth who was it one so john barnes matt leticia paul merson and paul gascoigne paul gets on first then john barnes and then i mean it's a mix of dream matches some of the goals he scored was incredible but mercenaries class as well you know especially but mainly my own problems when we finish cleaning that but mercenary i played with him we both won the premiership for middlesbrough winning in the league to get into the premiership and but mercy has had these problems as well but maltese has got some incredible goals so i'll put them both on level paw together but merson was a great player but john barnes made them jump balls bones it was incredible wow both feet i remember morning he obviously played for warframe he's a good player him and then i watched him i was first holiday it was in greece and it was a 1986 world cup and john barnes was beating all them brazilians and all that and i thought wow not knowing four years later i'm going to be playing with him in the world cup you never think of that and i'm loving playing the world cup and then obviously he's saying for liverpool they just stripes both feet as well great unbelievable player you know do you think do you think he fulfilled his england potential john barnes well i felt sorry for me because you get with england you get to the certain stage and eventually when you get knowledge a little bit then he started getting old fans were against him and that and i think he got him down a little bit you know yeah but he was probably with me but he used to [ __ ] weigh me up yeah because if we can now he's like either hasn't won any medals he's one [ __ ] everything with liverpool and that and therefore cops are not and i've reached him what are you talking about football and [ __ ] forward this is late in the world cup thing i said clean in a minute man you went how many medals you got i [ __ ] know anyway that's okay that says how much money you got in your bag code you just laugh but yeah jump on she's useless quality you know yeah yeah you get before and yeah he's gonna be good these are these kids no one is still young you know a lot of players don't come into the play become absolute class when until i've been 27 i was fortunate 23 but i was better even when i was just younger you know but i in the world cup i had the opportunity imagine made my squad you know peter certain terry butcher john barnes chris water peter busy briana from gary linda that's a team and i thought wow playing with these guys now and i know they encourage us i was quite fortunate to be with all them who were all 27 28 in the frame so although all that was it was just enjoying my footballing [Music] we've talked a lot about young players coming through you came through young and 17 i think yeah 16 off when i first played the game but wow just on the 17 i got yeah i remember i was ago played first games liverpool i returned with that man in the match then i was man united and that's when that style shows one of the things after that game i got minor match then the next game was tottenham i scored two got mana match and i remember going back home and i went dad when are you gonna [ __ ] come watch us please you went when you made it so you haven't [ __ ] made it yet i went [ __ ] you that okay she's just make sure you keep on playing well and then i thought that [ __ ] that that always stuck with us you know you haven't made it yet so i thought [ __ ] me i'm just 17. i've just got three mana matches against the three top teams in the country and he says yeah miller yet son when you made it i'll come watch it what advice would you give to young players coming up then who've got talent just you know maybe any knockbask is it it's called just keep playing with the smile on your face and just work keep working hard you know and eventually something will click you know someone will say something because i i remember i was like i knew i was good at 16 on the same for newcastle you know 16 off or not and uh i used to mess about a little bit and we've got manager of joshua and he says you come i want a word with you and he says that this is a oh yeah i think you're a good player i says i am he says yeah he says well losing me if i passed it otherwise he says hold on you got your contract i said two years and when he got two weeks if i passed it lose some weight he made me train at nighttime as well and then give me fellow stakes and that and when the north and noah i mean within 10 years two weeks or something i was captain of the youth team scored two in the cup youth foot clan captain of the reserves and then wanted us to play the first team and i panicked i was just on the 17 he said i played tomorrow for the first team against them i think it was norris i think she says no no says i don't want him i want to go back with the lads at that point because i remember let's go to warfight and i'm sitting in the bath with the trophy singing away and also don't look at tapping my shoulder i don't know what the [ __ ] is this now turn on zelda and john this is well played son you're a good player sausage starts and ellen gives a song el nino and he got all embarrassed in the left and two of you about that that's [ __ ] everything john she says wow so that's when i first really started like that you know i've been friends with him since and yeah so you know so you just sometimes just need that sometimes to kick up the ass or whatever but if you work hard you know eventually things will click and just tell kids it doesn't matter how many knockbacks you get just keep on hanging in because you just never know pwz for instance not back and then from marinated and stuff he didn't come chateau didn't become a professional i think really that much till he was 26. wow chris wilde worked in a sausage factory didn't stop playing until he was first team to lose 22 or something and he worked in the sausage factory so look where he ended up mostly like in world cups you know you could then jack john you've got players like that it's just you just need what one day just someone clicked so it's just sticking and just wait and something will happen where would you rank yourself among england's best ever players best best yeah even better than best yeah well we're good in the pub together that's for sure now with england i don't know i'm just i always you know always tell me so yeah and i was a world class player but i think if i had a little bit of brian robson inside of us a little bit of pwg a little bit of chris waddle i said wow i'd be like the ultimate player well i'm happy the way i was you know you when you got like the elixir pelle going to the news people to see me casual captain of england or you've got maradona's in gaza um that gives you a bit of a buzz and so it's stuff like that when you get players as good as them and praising you and everything i remember platini once we were playing against france england and platini's watching the game and he went this is because can i you should please follow me son says you're no problem so i was saying it and i went there and he went i don't really like you sir but my son is i don't know why he [ __ ] up for me i [ __ ] wanted to get myself back to the bathroom i went bastard well yeah he said but you know that was the same but yeah when you get people like that and then want to play against you and stuff like that it's it is nice you know and then you know you're you know like dave saving yesterday everyone everyone that doesn't we were taught to say who's the best player you've ever ever played with and i'll say me and that's really nice let me know wow for them to come out and say that yeah so i'm quite fortunate in that way but i don't regret there was i just said no i was all right that wasn't bad well teddy oh it was [ __ ] brilliant [Music] i have played against the kid once in scotland and he said he's going to beat me all over the pitch and i met him in the tunnel and i said you [ __ ] tough bastard he said well only the worst nightmare i went on the pitch i scored two within 10 minutes five minutes ago i put the ball through his legs he tried to kick because he got sent off get him finished and took my boots off walked into their dressing room and says yeah there's a bad boots for you one day you [ __ ] play like that and his friends just got so embarrassed that everyone all the players there his players start laughing and i walked out i see them but it was last year he said i still got their boots because i [ __ ] me decided that they didn't he said i've never said this big motivate that she's when i said i want to mock you up the game says you pissed all over i said i was a warm-up team what was it like being the richest player in the world saying my lads on when i was like 100 grand a month 30 until years ago and then i was getting endorsements that left right said then contract to take every day is their last year gaza when you moved from spurs to lazio because you were in really prime at spurs did you actually want to go um i was terry venables because he said look at ball i was top class manager i don't been offered managers jobs yeah yeah but opportunity to work abroad the experience and he says you know it's up to you if you want to go but you can steer but if you want to go it'll be a great experience and so i thought well think about it then whenever we went to the papers and that and tv because i might be saying relax and i've seen the fans and i went wow i thought that's all right that's 7.8 and and because i was getting after the world cup experience i was getting hounded like mad with the press and i thought i'll get away from it and go to italy i get worse the photographers god or maybe thousands and all the fans were crazy but then unfortunately for me after three months i brought me phibia and tibia so missed a year in a bit and then i got fit again and then dina's off was the manager he loved his then number changed managers in this guy i didn't really like and not and then none of the players liked him though the opportunity to decipher glasgow reigns as well but yeah i really enjoyed lazio um sometimes restricted because like the president will come and say we've lost the last two games he says you lose the next one i'm not paying you for six months and we copy didn't pay for six but really you see the captain when we're getting paid he's just got to wait wow yeah and then he come in one day and he's here right then i've got six games this is i've got six games now i was at seven games this is 14 points i'll give you 70 grand each 13 points i'll give you 60 grand each 12 points would give you 50. 11 points 40 10 points nothing nine points i'm finally ten grand eight points and finally until we got [ __ ] so luckily enough i scored to make it on level so we didn't work any money or lose i scored against esa milan yeah all the lads that's what was late in italy yeah and i couldn't move anywhere but the fans still love us now you know they're still singing um [Music] yeah i remember i left latio and i've been away for five six years i thought i'll go over for a holiday on my own and i flew over there i was getting pissed and telling a little bit so i went [ __ ] this i'm gonna taxi and i went in the countryside it was 50 minutes away and i've just seen this little caddyshack pub thing a little ball and no one in there i'm just the guy that obviously wonder whatever i said can i have a beer please anyway you guys going i went no i'm not and when you're gonna scream but i'm not i look behind this [ __ ] big picture of me on the wall lord he went it is you and he shot off and i seen him on the phone i went oh no and i said within 50 minutes ten thousand fans turned up that's it that's a scary taxi get rid of the ex bodyguards get attached and go back to england i thought god can't even go anywhere and that was six years after leaving so wow yeah they loved it i was fortunate even they're all my fans you know scoring that goal as well in front of a hundred thousand people so that was a nice feeling yeah so yeah it was it was an experience i remember i'm watching all the documentaries on you and when you went to italy i've never seen anything like in terms of a whole stadium waiting for you and people having to fight people off and you're running through the airport yeah i mean what was that like i don't know it was weird and scary first i didn't expect that because i remember this one kid trying to be funny he was like supposed to because i look like and he went over there and he [ __ ] come back within the next day [ __ ] he said oh god good luck the castle and then when i seen it look i've had a couple of bodyguards then maybe dad go to the call for two main bodyguards there was a bullet proof car and i think i can help bulletproof and the fans will just go mad and i'm thinking wow and then i remember going into the that hotel room and i'm in another hotel room in the same corridor so i said dad this is uh i'll just come along and see you okay i open up the door and there's a [ __ ] guy outside me though now with a gun i went [ __ ] hell i shut the door i went down anybody outside your door so yeah as i said that was it he went there's some [ __ ] with the [ __ ] corner say we go so i looked outside the patio i just had 22 body coats the exploding god's word for george clooney now hiding so he's sitting in the trees we're going it's all waiting for them waiting for us to make sure i'm okay security and i i thought this is not me that's going to bring an attention so i get the main bodyguard this is get yours all together please this is all downstairs 22 years and says come on dad watch this and i i got them all pissed probably [ __ ] drunk i said this where casual stuff is normal now one was in the pound in the morning in a woman's toilet with his gun on his chest like that pissed i was hanging from a tree pissed in every time i look oh [ __ ] turning them but the respect is for that you know and i just hang around and there's just friends so just be friends now you know but johnny the main one who was the captain he's in because mondiapol was the owner of lacho at that time and he um he was the mean captain you know he was a made him become really good friends you know really close to all the time you take us wherever i wanted to go and make sure i was in town and not look after us but he loved it he [ __ ] loved it he went god almighty says we were expecting somebody like gonna rewrite bastard and not talk to her and everything she's all felt completely different yeah yeah so he's good crack with that but then it was just that new manager was them he was like not very good i didn't like him yeah so it was just time to move on you know when you left english football um this was a quote from you it says no one understands how you feel and no one knows what it's like can you explain what you meant by that yeah i was you know um i wouldn't come back from the world cup or not i was like getting like i'd say something like ah you know what i might take up guitar lessons next time i'll wake up in the mornings [ __ ] two of you thoughts i'm saying we go oh i'm a fancy dicky boy and i said there's a rack of dickie boys and clothes i'd say we don't whatever i said anything it was just arriving and posters was opening this opening up and i didn't mind it and then all of a sudden the press starters had to go and i remember said guys not interested in football anymore he's just too interested to open shops two days later scored four goals against peter [ __ ] three goals with peter sheldon it's four goals and another game three in the other event yeah i think we've got it wrong yeah but um people know people know gaza not many people know paul gaskin you know but sometimes i think right i'm going to be paul gosselin and that's like i don't like that side of it it's like being serious now them they've been serious you know i think there was already seriously [ __ ] enough without want to be involved in some of this stuff so and then everyone wants to see gaza more than anything else what is excuse me what is the difference between gaza and paul gascoigne this poor guy stone's a bit more sensible than gaza i think he could help but i don't even know when i was like big podcast anymore i think the only one that calls me paul has been [ __ ] a bum and people are walking on the street and paul i'll just keep on walking oh sorry gaza oh sorry yeah what do you want so yeah it's you know i just broadcast changes like when i like want to be sensible and like if i'm doing it like a meeting or something like a contract or whatever i'll put the poor gasket ahead and make sure i'm including i think i'll write down everything everything i do and just in case i have a drink i'll relapse at least i've already written it down um but yeah when i get like contrast of something big coming up and up um just on big contrast now i'll just just [ __ ] pretend i'm sensible yeah and just leave it to me like you [ __ ] got that listen to it right let me know just let me know the [ __ ] d i'm gonna be there and then that's when the gaza comes straight back yeah do you think the media and all the fans across the world almost created gaza or did you create gaza well my dad was it was called medals called gasa with a double s and our coach managing who's from sunderland and he said gaza and coming said so they put you in gaza and i want to be called like my dad's nickname gaza is gaza but when we went to barbados for holiday once and we went into the town being ex-wife or not and it was like cuddly sharks and my [ __ ] name was all over the place in the mid in the [ __ ] the roughest place in barbados ever in gaza and cows and gaza went you know and then what's going on watching the movie the other day so funny the after i'm watching this movie and i was a black guy some layout and he looked the worst for weather and then in the [ __ ] movie this guy went god you look as bad as gaza you do and i went hold on i'm [ __ ] away in the back jesus christ [ __ ] passengers said i love your voices quicker it says start laughing me and i went [ __ ] just got messing a movie there for a new [ __ ] reason i'm doing nothing well yeah it's good i remember once i was in london i went down the rainbow in the in the hotel about 11 30 or something that's like a glass of wine someone said she's a i'm gonna have an autograph i went here no problem he says that's the second famous person today i said who's the other one she's behind you i looked it was justin hoffman and i've just been watching the night before meet the [ __ ] so i went [ __ ] i haven't got to go up or saying so i just went up and i said dozen yeah there's a glass of champagne he's with his daughter he says what's your name i says well paul gosling but they called me gaza he went oh you're that mad [ __ ] aren't you i says i used to be she says what was like a knuckle kid i said that was years ago i got sex if i left tears he says let's meet you go for it give me ten seconds i'm busy for a chat that shot off yes you're that mad [ __ ] on you what was it like being the richest player in the world because at one point i think you were yeah yeah done same without you on and i was like on a hundred grand a month you know i'm not you're talking about you know well thirty freaking two years ago yeah it wasn't a hundred grand a month and i wrote this gives a check for two million and then i was getting endorsements that left right said nine contracts for fiverr and so and i could almost put a muscle away then well i decided to buy all my family a house each and a car each and bought them all a holiday or not and it was okay you know um he just sometimes i think he's ever end but literally i get 100 grand a month but he attacked 60. so is that for 40 so i get mom's at five each next wave 10 for me and it's 10 for the rent of the place i left myself at 10 grand a month and that which i were trained twice a day so i didn't really need to do anything and i usually just go and just buy jewelry which is all in the bank somewhere in bradford loads of julia bought i'll just put that in the wood for me nephews and that so then obviously i got divorced since someone went down here a little bit and then also just everything starts coming back now plenty work on cobalt you know just got payments from newspapers and deals and katie's done magnificent first you know really well so now i'm back on the up um more than happy um you know i'm enjoying i'm trying to enjoy the life as much as i can uh these venues are good because you know i miss i miss the fans and so you know doing these venues you get to see them like yesterday over 600 people doing over 300 selfies or not and so it's like being amongst fans again and they love it and i'll just i'll just [ __ ] tell about all the mad stuff and then eventually i said i did play football as well it was just like you [ __ ] know that there's always so laughing and then i tell them to thanks for tuning offices because i miss i miss my football i miss the fans because i said tina fans you know i always remember gladiator entertain the fans and you win them over and that's that's always thinking about that you know um so these venues something i'm just going sometimes i get emotional and thinking god i [ __ ] i used to be playing whatever like a hundred thousand people or not so you missed that side of it but when you get like turn the people that turn up to say is not and uh the amount of hugs and they give you you know we got a lot of people not long ago i was running scenes which was yeah and i'm going down the aisle and this blog is with two with his two the proper growing blood is two kids one was a six and the other one was four something wrong about that is he comes up he starts crying his eyes out and went on his knees and crying proper crying right now it's me [ __ ] gary please the kids think i'll [ __ ] hit you anywhere i love you so much that already said to the kids you don't know who he is the kids were sitting small back when i was playing and i would stop crying please don't think the kids think i [ __ ] hate you he went you're [ __ ] my hero i was like i get a lot of that and these venues get a lot of people crying and not you know so that might be so that gives you buzz and i'm thinking wow you know i used to get this week in a week out and somebody i never took advantage of you just never think of it so when you're like when you finish playing you think wow you know it's like i didn't realize suddenly like the world cup semi-final were played at the stadium at roma the roma stadium now i'm that was in the same and incredible now i'm saying palacio and that's our home ground and it was only like you take advantage of it and it's only like when i left and then i've looked at it and i thought [ __ ] me i should be there every week so you know you never think that you you know and you think god look at that stadium i played that every [ __ ] week well every other week and scored in front of 100 000 and stuff like that you know and so and stuff like that that's what i would give kids to experience if they wanted any experience or whatever things like to take every day is their last year and glenn wrote i passed away blessing listen barry always said well you know enjoy every day this is because before you know it your career is over and you know and he was right i'm kind of ugly seeing look upon plan three years before you're gonna quit when you know you're gonna quit playing three years beforehand plan what you're gonna do when you finish playing so i went okay i'm thinking well [ __ ] i'm still got three years i'll wait no no i've still got two years next thing i'm [ __ ] not playing anymore so shouldn't remember what kenny diagram says what if i do know i said i'll tell you what they won't get pissed me with a [ __ ] rehab but um yeah so you know you just i tell young kids every time they play or train treat it as a last game treat it as a last train session because you just never never know you know i just never never know i've seen loads of kids brilliant players eventually getting injured i was fortunate you know get with people that quit bleeding because the ligaments was a good surgeon put my ligaments right and then but three months later there were punches in the jaw and broke my kneecap a half minute cut was i put that right and then i come back from that and then three freaking three months later that brought me february and there we are which he fixed that and then to get back playing as good as i did especially for the ends getting mana mats against e.c milan and rangers and destroying players like up so i was lucky enough mr brown had a great sergeant you know because he gets some players unfortunately kind of play anymore yeah your ex-pa she said this of you a prodigious talent with a tendency towards self-destruction two fears kell i was discussing she used major reason for him there she wasn't even got the monster she was not known she was writing a book behind me back that bookshelves it was this life and how do you get over and recover from big injuries that put you out for a year just because because i had no nothing else you know and i was nothing i loved would okay i liked your woodwork but i thought i've got nothing else um i love my football listen you're gonna have to [ __ ] craft your nuts up for nine months and it's hard because you're training on you on and when everyone's finished treating you're looking outside when you're working in the gym trying to get fit and get your muscles back watching them all enjoy themselves and think about it just another day and i just took it as i never thought of it in one month i'm gonna be okay i just said [ __ ] keep it in the day right today i'm finished tomorrow let's start again next day right i'm gonna keep on going and eventually just let's just see next thing i know i'm [ __ ] back back playing again you know yeah so yeah you know i missed four years of football because of these injuries in four years i've i've got 57 capsules and i would have made a hundred so missing four years it was quite hard um but yeah you know when you get injured like i just because i've had so many you know i've had like two broken noses broken cheekbone and broken neck got metal hip in six broken arms and broken kneecap ligaments broken february tibia angle so quite a few operations get out but uh you're just gonna [ __ ] play right and you know you you don't you don't know anything else you know for football so it's up to you yeah they [ __ ] walk away or you [ __ ] graft and thought right then i want i want the buzz again playing in front of the fancy i just worked and worked and worked you know yeah you said earlier sometimes you get emotional so what is that emotion what makes you emotional no just the love for the fans that give us you know i don't have many muscles against anybody and it's like when you see a muslim when you get these people coming up and crying and kissing you and hugging you it can be emotional you know especially when you they encourage they're giving us all this love and i kind of [ __ ] go and show them what i can do and make them happy on the people but just being there makes them happy and to see them coming up and being so nice to you now you can get it can get you a little bit it can be too much yeah yeah it's nicer but it can be too much just emotionally that way really yeah so you famously turned down man united so why did you turn down man united and what do you think of alex ferguson one of the best world you know i like like when you see the likes of pally and maradona and young cry for not nothing right and be as good as that definitely so i knew it was a play act because then but when you say i want to be a manager how are you going to hope can anyone be as good as alice fix and say but i turned out man you needed to be i think it was more than just because the spears off of mum and dad house 420 grand then my dad a car and mr sunbed and and then at that time spurs were better than marinated you know they're much better than man united yeah it was only until now same for spurs a year later that's when fergie brought on beck's scores and start winning everything so you think wow but then when i was at latvia when i was leaving i did speak to alex ferguson and says look um i'm going to leave do you want to say this is paul i said that he had transformed himself like erica now if he goes i'll um i'll just i'll send you if he sees then obviously i don't need another player like him it's all erica state you know but um i don't know sometimes you think well well but terry bennett was a great manager you know he asked any of the england players that worked with him but sometimes you think i wonder what it'd be like if i had a flame for my united because you're like when i've been a couple of the games there and seen the fans it's incredible and what some of the players have been there and achieved you know but for me it's like the spurs fans were fantastic and i couldn't do anything wrong they loved it even now you know when i played that charity game all the fans stood up and waiting for us going on the pitch another charity game so i'm well loved at spurs you know even the man you know when i get there though i was thinking one poor guy can say well the fans are singing that the man they had the chance and as they so now i've seen them not logged up was frozen he was 82 i was at the game this is last year and he says paul also said what's to say and i'm going to [ __ ] you have a good game anyway how are you doing i said yeah i'm worried thanks and your bastard she's just [ __ ] might you're not saying for me when you had the chance because no one [ __ ] ever lets me down i went i know i'm sorry but thanks for the watch it gives you and yeah yeah [ __ ] only give eleven notes i'll give you one see there's some [ __ ] play though son says anyway you keep him busy i went yeah i'm all right thanks i'm still [ __ ] enough just look little guy i come on a monster you know what he achieved i his being a manager you know aldous ferguson being the monster wow what if i can talk too many dollars incredibly cook no [ __ ] as well you know so yeah right now would have got a few [ __ ] bargains of him definitely but you know i still still would have been the same player you know his teddy bear said you changed paul gaskin and he changed his football just let him do what he wants just gotta make sure you just keep on top of them though if you get out of the outer hand a little bit which didn't happen a few times and were strong managers who wouldn't mind kind of putting you in check were they good for you would you say yeah yeah if i knew what but they didn't have to tell it or did something wrong so i knew i was doing something wrong um so they didn't really have to tell us that this is we know what you're doing don't worry she says we'll just [ __ ] bring you in and somebody running the bollocks off here which i've had that happens a couple of times where the lads have to slide in after the games that they have had to [ __ ] get up on a sunday eight o'clock in the morning meet the goats and just run the bollocks office until i was on my knees being sick okay i'm sorry it wasn't happening again so yeah but you know you get like they say rangers wallace smith and archie knocks wallet gives us a bollock and rtb native is and archie gives a bottle of wallaby nation thought [ __ ] me wherever stand here so i was just making sure you're keeping us unchecked you know so yeah all the mans have prayed for all of this yeah you know i never i never let any of them down always performed on the pitch and the fans you know so i didn't let anyone down when i come to the football i didn't let anyone down you know because i was looked at like like 90 minutes on that pitch that was maybe that was my freedom i could do what i wanted and for 90 minutes so any problems i had going on the pitch when we for 90 minutes i thought right then i can enjoy yourself now this is my home you know so i [ __ ] just used to just play and enjoy it and just get get on the ball as much as possible because i knew after the game any problems i had regards paparazzi or whatever they've just come back again so yeah that's why i love trading so much if you ask any of the managers of coaches i've never seen anyone see one of the hardest trainers i've ever seen in life i just loved it and i usually got to be training for a quarter to ten whatever 10 o'clock i got eight o'clock and i played people in head tents with the ground stuff with wellies on yeah just for an hour and a half just to flick and then after training the old finish i'd stay behind and pretty had tense with them again until about five and five at night yeah and the gaffer said go [ __ ] home now say in a minute man i'm winning this game again she's only [ __ ] ground stuff oh well these are they were good though looking back would you regard your career as a success yeah yeah shut up doubt you know listen and whatever the president who's the highest transfer player from um newcastle despairs the highs from spurs to lacio the highest from lots of ranges the highs from rangers to middlesbrough the highest from military evidence is transfers so far it's a very bad player to get one of the most expensive players ever you know people don't pay that much money to buy a player if you're [ __ ] you know so for me i was success it was only after i finished playing that a few times i put myself went down the rails a little bit um no one to blame but myself you know but i quickly pulled myself around it now and then obviously i was just trying i don't look good i don't think about tomorrow i just concentrate on today you know as long as it's like in the next hour long so don't have a drink or whatever um i know what's ahead of his plan for everything right i'm going to do this and do that but i don't plan too far ahead because if it goes wrong and i get myself down about it yeah so i just wait and just make sure everything's okay i always look after my family and that yeah when was your last relapse oh ages ago yeah ages ago and i've been sober for five years yes over four years five years you know the last three laps i think it was well it was it's not like a relapse regards three days three weeks on the bench or something it's like two days where i just [ __ ] go off on it just sit and sit in a hotel room get pissed watch a movie and then two days later i'll just [ __ ] start drinking water again so i think it was about five weeks ago six weeks after two days been done and i just stopped i thought you know i can't be bothered by this i just got bored with it they i don't around people's drinking doesn't bother me one bit yeah that doesn't bother us i'd rather people drink in front of us than hate it because it makes me think more about it why behind it just [ __ ] get it out um yeah or if they don't if they're like if i know they want a drink and they don't get one because i'm there i go and get them a drink yeah and say yeah there's a couple [ __ ] cocktails listen don't worry about this is because if i want to drink i just [ __ ] go and get one so somebody i don't want one so just [ __ ] i'll cheers paul next thing i'm gonna [ __ ] know you're like are you sure you don't want to drink for [ __ ] off i want from now yeah there's brothers you know because i'm one of them if i want to drink i just [ __ ] go and get one yeah it's just something it's not the drink it's the consequences afterwards what normally happens well i lose work yeah you press hammers or what's it called i could stick or a lot of people yeah people say a little [ __ ] state of him so yeah more than like that but the press didn't read anything because of the injunction it's just now there's the consequences it's just like you know at the end of just not turning up for a job so if i've got five jobs and i'll turn down the first one because i'm pissed and the other four jobs let's cancel it so he's not going to [ __ ] make it we'll cancel it i'll get you so there's a consequence like that yeah no so now i'm busy now got quite a bit on this one i'm [ __ ] i don't know why i'm doing it but it's [ __ ] well i've got five weeks off so i'm gonna do some fly fish a bit of golf and then look at six venues in that on september then october and november but i'm going to do this thing but already i did the interview with pastors i'd do a mental disorder not mention seven psych psychiat psychiatrist no psychologist test pastel it's [ __ ] eight days in the dark with east celebrities me in the 80s living in it it's called in the dark so you'll live in the dark for eight days be more worried for them but there's what's it called it's been shown on tv live so he used bbc because of the um ultra lake lake but we can't see it but you can see us but we can't see i don't even know who's next to us because the 80s in the dark no late but [ __ ] old and then you have to do challenges in the dark so he says what happens and the guy when he's funny says what happens if someone's next to you but you know he's giving that stuff [ __ ] tell you i said i don't know i said i wouldn't say anything i'm in the [ __ ] dog i said i'm more worried about what happens where there will go for a [ __ ] and then the dog you went you should try to find somewhere this is okay then so yes it is that's gonna be some challenger wow and that's in september so everyone back home can see is what we're doing but we can't see what results i wouldn't even know who's one yard away from us or nothing oh yeah kid is happy with war she's [ __ ] getting out of it then we'll put that with gaza back in the day did the media scare you no not once no no i just did you have debt threats or anything like that no no no whatsoever just they they said the media if i did something wrong and they wrote i did something i accept that it's the life that's elijah couldn't handle you know i think why did that [ __ ] like if i want to know something [ __ ] come see so i [ __ ] tell them i've got nothing to hate and i put everything in my book anyway another cocaine i took years ago 18 years ago or whatever um again morphine tablets [ __ ] the drink the rehabs the [ __ ] jail i put everything in the [ __ ] book so you know why they have to write lies and i said well so the public don't even know everything so so but the me the press never never bothers i mean i've just did this thing for uh this other documentary and it's um as for the italian thing in the building um i did his interviews and down and did a bit on the beach we're playing football with these little 10 year olds and i went to this big [ __ ] building and i'm thinking what the [ __ ] is that they're putting down there and there was about 200 back pages of all quality stuff on me guys was a [ __ ] brilliant player gaza's best player in the world pelly gossip captain just all around himself looking at everyone and go quite the most i went the [ __ ] did you do this for they went it took us ages to do all this waiting for you coming i went wow and so i thought [ __ ] he has passing he could have been a better player i couldn't have been any better than i was looking all them headlights and i thought i can underpress though i could i didn't fulfill my potential i went [ __ ] all right bastards [Music] gaza you had a 250 000 contract with the sun after italia 90. um looking back was that a good deal for you or they bought you i think um someone from the sun said they're buying your body and soul and milking you how did that all feel i didn't bother us you know i've been getting that much money but i i think i'd turned down eventually these down but i mean the lies of world i've been in court i've won 15 times against the daily star i've run against the meal and then i'll just news of the world they had they were hacking my phone for six years so i went about 80 thousand then i knew i was getting hacked i know by my own how did you know because i experienced it from the first time like i'd call you up like i'd i'll call you up hi how are we doing bang we'll get cut off right and then so now they know they've got your number made them up they're ready now recording next time i call you it's perfect they're recording so i know that and they'll offer text here i'll see you i'll call you in a minute send the text it'll go so far it won't go through you they've written down the text i'll text you again and go perfect so we've got some new wow so new then the sunday mirror were there 12 years with them so this happened twice the phone hacking not just the first time three times sure that was 12 years and then i knew i rang up me the police said [ __ ] check people when i'm getting hurt again it was the sun 12 years so the dispute is 870 000. wow nearly a million damages yeah so that's all right so i'm [ __ ] just relaxed a little bit no the [ __ ] i don't want to do these venues but i'll kill you they're laughing so go and get yourself a place now and says okay ma'am go and buy yourself a house says mom i don't know where i want to live at the moment yeah but yeah so so now you've got injunctions as well on some of them yeah really yeah they can't write anything bad or press well i'll just take them accord straight within seconds now i've got top players you know so it's like and i was going no fighting open because i'm going to win it anyway so yeah it doesn't cost me cost them a lot of money so you give us 700 and i'll just put that in the bank and just look after the family a little bit yeah and then you just just mean for the other 170 or whatever but it doesn't bother us like i just if i'm getting paid that muslim [ __ ] hacked me as much as i've ever wanted i didn't give a [ __ ] you know packers every [ __ ] year for one so paul you've earned a lot of money in your life yeah and it sounds like you've given a lot to your family and sounds like at times you've probably spent a lot so what have you learned about managing money oh yeah there's something just try and make don't write down everything you know i'm trying to eventually i'll just start and do things on my own but now i've got like a top lawyer i've got a top accountant i would call kate use they're really good at what she does now so she's your manager yeah yeah me me a change my manager so i just got me i've got good people on board now you know well i just thought i could do myself so i've got a little more on board i've got like if i want to invest stuff i've got people prepared to ready to invest anything i wanted i want to do it i thought at the moment i'm okay yeah just let me do what i'm doing and enjoy myself for a little bit now you know for [ __ ] getting hurt and stuff like that yeah so this is a lot of money i'll just leave it where it is at the moment i'm just going to simply enjoy myself yeah you know so that's that's what i've done there's plenty of this work coming up and then i'm [ __ ] this thing in the dark i'm thinking yeah i'll [ __ ] do it how to do psycho this psychologist says he when he passed everything he went but i've heard he was scared of the dog i said yeah i was when i was seven i said i sleep with the lady and she says what changed then and when i'm [ __ ] 55 that's what [ __ ] james made i don't need to [ __ ] lay down anymore he started laughing instead of reason i think he'd be all right yeah he says what happens if you do you don't like somebody in there i said i don't know who's in there it's a [ __ ] in the dark you were yeah never thought about that i see so [ __ ] up i said i don't give a [ __ ] i said i'll be in there and see if i'm gonna help anyone they want and says anyway if i get bored i just start talking to myself just weighing them up and he says um what happens if someone gets on your nerves i said what i'll do is i'll just stare at the forehead and she says why is that and i said i don't see anything i just keep staying in the forehead and just think ah you've got a bandage around his head and he's not well fit see a prayer for him that's a good idea that she's a good idea he says i'm going to ring up and say yeah you're ready for the show so if i can kill you i went yeah you wanted me but i didn't realize [ __ ] i'm doing this like what we're doing over the phone like this in the kitchen of the lodge and i would say just be [ __ ] sister a boyfriend we just talked about katie got the windows open yeah and listen to everything i'm seeing oh [ __ ] crying crying and they just stayed alive for me and i just said father god save him [ __ ] let them die which eventually died so i jumped in bed next to them give him a cup punches in the [ __ ] face i went remember when i was younger and just give me a little whack [ __ ] there's a couple back and then stuck there but i'm a little one for a laugh and just [ __ ] lied next to him probably 45 now and then around me family he's gone i said yeah i didn't get section once that was 18 years ago for 11 years he said what was that so cool that was alright didn't take any medication yeah yeah i just needed it i was i was [ __ ] that and that cocaine 18 years ago so that just [ __ ] put me in the nose i was for 11 years and then after 11 years i said okay paul you went didn't take any tablets just [ __ ] turned loads of water detox never touch the center and [ __ ] that so you know it's really just the drink in that book yeah and he went wow he said [ __ ] only been so a lot i went yeah i have a sort of i said that's been no or says anything i do wrong it's me wrong doing no one i don't blame anybody because i just [ __ ] believe if a [ __ ] flower dies i'll drink on it and believe in the flower [ __ ] you can die you know a bubble didn't work i drink on bloom [ __ ] bug you know i'd blame anyone but now i don't blame anyone you know i'll blame yourself if anything bad happens or whatever i blame yourself you know i don't [ __ ] use anybody's excuse but i'm enjoying life at the moment you know right yeah you know yeah i get down a little bit what makes you what makes you down just to say what's called sometimes if i want to go somewhere something to be difficult or just i think missing football uh might catch us down a little bit or if like um you could someone say you're going to do something you get prepared for it and then also then it gets cancelled not that i've done anything it's just them or we've had to do something all this like the corvette thing was okay and i got it got me down a little because i missed out loads of work but then i kept on thinking hold on paul you've got money you're [ __ ] fortunate thing of the [ __ ] families single parents with three kids not me and a penny and i thought that's good so i [ __ ] i went on tv and i [ __ ] key in boris johnson and they couldn't put it on just cut it didn't put it together again yeah [ __ ] bastard what the [ __ ] are you doing uh kingdom because and i remember the last time i was with him i was sitting next to him what did you say about him i understand what you're doing in our country you're fat [ __ ] sorted out this is the [ __ ] next thing you're [ __ ] covered to this go about that and says [ __ ] you know says um start [ __ ] all these people i haven't got any money i can't go to work in corvette and you're [ __ ] you're so cute for you getting a lift in the [ __ ] ten down and seat having a nice little party there and the way you [ __ ] wanted there we're not he didn't have [ __ ] cover did he [ __ ] and i just cleaned them and so they went paul kelly put that on tv so there's this consulate wow i went okay no problem but i did sit in the entirety match once you come on for the last 10 minutes before playing germany charlie game and you're sitting next to the destiny right i got her how to [ __ ] last 90 minutes i went i have to dream about it's hard for six weeks to catch 90 minutes not sitting [ __ ] ten dinners eat [ __ ] eating cakes by the [ __ ] looks of it he went yeah i never thought about that i'm a rugby player anyway that was it [ __ ] just you got it i was selling [ __ ] off i've got um two main questions and then we'll move into a quick fire and the quickfire you can just answer nice and short because i know we're nearly at time yeah so your dad i understand was away a lot when you were younger you used to go away and he also didn't come to that many of your games what was your relationship with your dad and i was i wouldn't get any clothes on yeah yeah i did everything but i even when he went for a walk i'd like [ __ ] he come to the bones to see the [ __ ] he said i'll come see you for a couple of weeks and okay dad [ __ ] six months later dad when are you going back no i'll be out here son but then he did i don't know he just didn't he i think he suffered like myself from a claustrophobic and he didn't like lifts or not and i think being around a lot of people but and when i when i went early he wasn't [ __ ] daft says i've come lately for a couple of weeks i said yeah okay dad no problem [ __ ] hell then two years later dad every are you right he says that [ __ ] i loved it she says i'm coming the game as well so he saw coming to the game at lazio because i had security now and he was okay and yeah but because there was no work my dad worked abroad it was like you know off which is of its impact he was a hot carrier he had so he worked abroad in germany and he used to said about me mama monina and then when i was seven he come back home and says i've got a present for you and he gives me first letter football wow and that's when i [ __ ] start dribbling everywhere but you know so but yeah he worked so hard and then obviously he [ __ ] was one of the hardest man in newcastle he used to headbutt everyone he ended up with a [ __ ] look you know fathers off school and i just heard my mom think paul quite quick i don't know what he does eyes were all and she would put his fingers in his mouth quick and i put my [ __ ] feet look at one still bent now something so swollen he's talking about a brain tumor so he was in the hospital for eight months and so they opened them up but not and you just have these bad turns and i always be next to them but then i went everywhere with them i i'm almost i bought them 80 cars [ __ ] three boats [ __ ] mobile homes [ __ ] everything [ __ ] jewelry he's going to make watches [ __ ] knows remember once he's left and he says i'm coming to the game he says yeah [ __ ] i know two [ __ ] rate you all you knew i just bought this there's only three in the country and bought this new [ __ ] mercedes soft top 230 and this new [ __ ] watch with 70 grand and i should have met that and so he says we're not drinking for a son i said i'm having a drink that murray says get yourself a whiskey man no he said that and she's gone so i'm gonna whisk your dad says get yourself another one sorry dad i'm [ __ ] going to bed now he's all right son sleep well cheers i look up and i wake up and i look and i just see me [ __ ] watch as god i went faster so he [ __ ] got me watched so i went oh [ __ ] no please and i just went and looked open the curtains of the car park new car he's [ __ ] off her birth and just took him yeah just took him i just let him [ __ ] class and he went [ __ ] me daddy you got me what every [ __ ] car it went to maine now you shouldn't have a drink i said you [ __ ] give us a drink you know well it had to be done didn't it i said what do you do with the coyotes i made sell it so you used to buy cars sell them buy your second ham on and keep get put the rest of the money in the bag with 40 watches [ __ ] out he's [ __ ] i love them yeah they're my dad yeah so when i go home newcastle is just going to stay in his spare room and that yeah and just sit with him put his bets on sadly i [ __ ] miss him more than anything yeah saturday i'm missing one i think when he was dying i quickly left ebony i was living room quickly and um told my family to leave his this one made me dance and he was like and he just stayed alive for me and i remember just looking like that and [ __ ] breathing and i just said father god two seconds he'll save him a [ __ ] let them die or two minutes later he died he died so jumping beds next to them give him punches in the [ __ ] face i mean remember when i was younger and you just give me a little whack [ __ ] there's a couple back and then stuck there but little one far left and just [ __ ] lied next to him for 45 now and then around me family six o'clock it went and he's he's gone and then they put them in this police chopper thing where this thing i went no no [ __ ] putting them in a chopper get [ __ ] out there get them in the coffin do them up and [ __ ] give them home i'm going to stay with them so just i stayed with him for three days so weird as well because i left the coffin door open for him and then played these songs i used to like and i went upstairs i thought why didn't i just tell you what he's roaming up um because obviously passed away at the end of the bed you have one of these puffy things and he's washed back in that was there in the back i was [ __ ] in the cup and just went moved about two foot off this thing floating and i went [ __ ] off dad will you go in the bed that's the [ __ ] look at your noises i think [ __ ] me he's hanging about somewhere and i'll go back down and make sure he's still in the coffin nothing [ __ ] out yeah so yeah and that's it and then eventually i said the family like you come around and see yeah wow because all my family live in the same street next door to each other i bought them all house in excel each other so the [ __ ] half numbers but i'm i'm in trouble i get from all them and i know anyway i'm [ __ ] because soon as i go and i see my dad's curtain shot that's it i look because sister's getting shot moms have short brothers other sisters they must have knew i was coming [ __ ] it taxi please take us back to [ __ ] newcastle yeah very close to me dad yeah took him everywhere everywhere i understand you had a friend called stephen when you were young and he was killed in front of you and died in your arms so how did that affect you badly well yeah when i wanted to see psychiatrists when i was telling you you got hit well round i would say he ran in front of him he screamed and he got hit and the [ __ ] taxi driver stayed in the [ __ ] car and i ran down and just died and we laughed i think he was still alive because he's listening with that his last movement and it's just 20 minutes waiting for someone to [ __ ] turn up with dead body and then they're sleeping in the [ __ ] same room as a coffin now so i i had um and there was stupid habits like and then they wouldn't twitches and [ __ ] end up with loads of twitches or not then when she was a girl that not eventually went away you know but um yeah my mom wants to see psychiatrists but i just thought i was okay and then i did a letter to him and said i'm sorry whatever happened you know or not so then i felt better than that seems like i just need to talk to them and the chairs if it was steven i miss this one or not so so it eventually got better and better you know but it was just twitches they ended with [ __ ] all these stupid twitches making noises and everything yeah wow looking off the football kept us going yeah away from that but yeah it was just the twitches more than anything else are you ready for the quick fire round yeah let's do it are you a confident person yeah out of 100 what's your percent of confidence um depends what i'm doing if it's sport 110 if it's like i don't know i mean i i did do the weakest thing you know about beating the final but on the confidence level i really think i'm right up there near the top are you a rebel yeah [ __ ] more than a rubber he's definitely that's 100 reverend i'm why just love being in trouble i like you getting in trouble i can learn some more at the end of the day but i don't know i just i get bored so quickly and if i like think of something you know i'm going to do that and i might have a couple of drinks and i'm going to do it and then i wake up in the morning and [ __ ] me i just she did that and i know because i just checked my mobile i may go 100 texts or 100 missed calls what the [ __ ] are you doing what did i do so yeah i'm 100 are you misunderstood yeah sometimes yeah well missus said because people i don't give the chance of people to really know me because people like me family know me katie knows it's obviously more than anything and not many people really get to know me um because i don't give too much away what do people mostly misunderstand about you um probably that i can't be emotional and i don't show it sometimes you know as men we see we think we can't get everything all frankly no you know or help i've learned to see listen i need help regarding anything you know i need help can you help us whatever to do with this or something like that you know yeah do you trust anyone no really i think it's i think it's because i don't trust myself like i want to go on holiday i've got five weeks off and i want to go to holiday but i can't i just don't trust myself because i don't know if i'll make it back say so i'm thinking [ __ ] i want to go away uh i'm bad i can get my license back but out there not and then i'll get my license because i don't trust myself because i have a drink and again i'm getting called and i killed myself i'll kill somebody else so yeah i think once i thought if i trust myself more and i'll trust other people and i was like i love myself and that's why i love everybody so i just want to introduce myself a little bit more and answers to other people you said once you'd occasionally have a brandy before a match did that really help no was it it wasn't it was a it was in the cup fight for glasgow rangers you know the first half i wasn't playing very well and the courts went have you had a drink i don't know she's gonna get one i went [ __ ] okay see you meant that i went and went in the director's box and got named brandies when batman says you know you know the lads are laughing and they get he went and he had a drink now i said yeah but a few brands he went go out and [ __ ] do the business so i went oh okay then come on guys i scored two got minor match [ __ ] one new epic that was it they went [ __ ] right well going out tonight [ __ ] thanks very much for the two girls you're going home you've already had your [ __ ] drink i went bastards but now it's just that it was that cup fame that was the only one yeah do you like being on your own i hate it yeah so it all depends if i get blessed along walking down the streets and that's so so sometimes it's nice just to sit indoors watch movies in order so i'll make a nice assignment tonight and i don't really like it as much but then i get sometimes worn out i get bored so quickly but if i'm watching a movie then [Music] when people get worried say well i'm not coming out this is because i've just got pestered for the last [ __ ] three hours i'm just gonna watch a movie i'll be maybe later so a lot of people don't worry about it that's okay i don't blame you is it you don't like being on your own um i think too much when i'm i'm thinking i call this thinking thinking you know i think the wrong things are thinking i'm going to do this i want to do that i think too much if i'm with people and i don't think it's much in which i'm okay then you know jane knotted your ex-pa she said this of you a prodigious talent with the tendency towards self-destruction what do you think about that i was discussing she used major it wasn't [ __ ] there she wasn't even [ __ ] man she was only there to be translated not known she was writing a book behind me back uh two fierce cow and uh yeah that book serves it was this life and to be fair when i was with us it was too fierce but she was not me agent or nothing like that she was just a translator for me and it wasn't me that even what's called it was b is an ex agent who employed that to work for us and then not knowing every day she was writing down everything but things like that used to bother us it doesn't bother us now you know when i say you're talking about it i said oh good luck i just i wish i wished them well i said prayer for them yeah what would you say was the best and worst stage of your football career i think the best was making me debbie for newcastle i always wanted to go in front of the the the um gallagher end which i did the worst it's got to be daphne's um the the ethical thing you know and i [ __ ] did that energy i'd [ __ ] just decided because i was playing the best football ever i couldn't do a foot wrong i was i was beating players for fun could bps playing fool get mad and match and then i do that through that tackle and then being out for a year it was worse but i worked hard for it but that was that uh that energy that's probably the worst um what's your biggest success um losing me [Music] what's your biggest failure no yeah biggest failure well do your success first yeah losing movements in the probably that's a [ __ ] taker look at that there's susie there's the taker oh it's a cat that's our cat that's a cat is it it's a big cat okay no it's a house cat i thought i thought you were going to pull some prank what's the word failure yeah what's your biggest success and your biggest failure success is like make me debut and especially successfully me and what i wanted to use to play for my country england and biggest failure is um i think it was um it's got me that injury and obviously the biggest feeling i was like taking that cookie and 18 years ago um and a breaking psychotic it was horrible i thought i'm i wanted to die to be fair luckily enough for them 11 years just talking to the counselors and i'm pulled around and never touched the thing so that was a horrible feeling what's the biggest risk you ever to do that again what's the biggest risk you ever took i've took the loads you know risks where do i the biggest risk well i remember the um the chairman of middlesbrough bought us a new team bus 400 thousand pound and just left the garage and for middlesbrough football club on the bus guy ready brand new only left the garage and i got excited and so i told the guy about the mans i wanted to see you so he went up here and he left the keys in the bus had jumps in it i thought i'm taking this bastard into town didn't manage to get very far i'm [ __ ] fell in the ditch and [ __ ] i wanted to say the buses on say the branch was filled the [ __ ] wind and everything and 400 grand just left the garage it was brand new team bus for us i almost remember thinking [ __ ] i'm in trouble the brian robson gaza well where's the [ __ ] boss i went it's in the woods with the three best copper i think a [ __ ] damaged i'm [ __ ] not gonna get a new bus yeah [ __ ] that was there's a [ __ ] one i said excellent [ __ ] boss right i think it cost us 47 grand or something getting fixed um what's your biggest regret are you sure you have um it's quite quite a lot of quick quickly your biggest regret is probably i think it would like that take the cookie and let me family that would have myself down more than anything else and the people around us that loved us not but i stopped doing that um i've had quite a few regrets but it was in my own room but i try and they put them behind us you know if anyone watching or listening is struggling with their own maybe addictions or demons what advice would you give them having overcome many of yours yeah i've come over so much in mind you know um i would just um don't be scared to ask for help because it's only [ __ ] a lot of people a lot of people like us or other people end up drinking or whatever or t because we find it so difficult to say no well someone said like my sister she got more foot in the [ __ ] double dagger bus say oh lindsay anna can you do this no you think nothing of it i think god i wish i could do that so you know a lot of addicts like that so but the main one is just you know don't be scared that's for help i'm not no doesn't bother me if i need [ __ ] help on stomach i do i say oh i listen i need a better help yeah can you help us whether what i need to go somewhere maintain this okay well i just think i can do it on my own but sometimes i need someone there just to help us just in case out goes wrong so i ain't scared to ask for help yeah so what are you doing now and in the future what does gaza do with himself now yeah well this i mean you've got these venues which is good and as in people come and talk to you live and do q and a's and no i don't i'll be on script right i do selfies and i do autographs and then i go on stage and then afterwards i'll i'll speak for now and then let me ask you some questions maybe just 10 or something like that yeah i've got all that on then i've got this documentary coming up i've got maybe next year someone they don't movie about me life i think um sean beam wanted to play me but i think i think the guy that's going to play amaze guy from game of thrones don't know his name so the story about me life um movies gonna be in the cinema wow so yeah um and then i've got one another book deal and then i've got this documentary in the dark thing okay now that's going to be some challenge um so i've got quite a bit on yeah you know all i've just got to do is just enjoy the work ahead of us you know and make the most of like when i've got time off enjoy it instead of like just sitting in the [ __ ] bedroom just watching tv and not go out and just show him something yeah and the your autobiography what's it called and let's get everyone to go and read it you've written already one book about your life yeah really may leave you know as uh that's what it's called my life yeah gaza may like yeah and read it because it's got everything in there you know and how i've overcome this other one being that was the first one being gaza the other one's called to hell and back and that was [ __ ] odd it was remember the boot rider coming in it was so funny i said where the [ __ ] you been because i said where the [ __ ] have you been i said you're [ __ ] writing that down he's now getting angry saying are you [ __ ] right not down i said you [ __ ] wake me up he said i'm my [ __ ] waiting up that's the book everything i said um yeah talking one three three times a week year month and i went he says everything i [ __ ] said to him he put in the [ __ ] book and i went go on [ __ ] off enough now because i said [ __ ] off i said enough now as his writing so at the end of this book i says right he's all on his story now now go and [ __ ] off cause i said he's all read my story now go and [ __ ] off and that's at the end of it i went [ __ ] me whatever they did so honey if i could put everything you went well that's you in it well a hell and back i mean yeah my right level cheers yeah that's a good one guys i just want to say this been so much fun thanks a lot for giving us all your time very grateful oh pleasure man thank you nice to meet you as well i just have to say we absolutely loved it the crew so honest so open so real so let me know what you think in the comments make sure you do share this video and remember if you don't risk anything you risk everything [Music] you

Channel: Rob Moore

Views: 84,426

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Id: 4Qp3meqjMg0

Length: 94min 15sec (5655 seconds)

Published: Mon Jul 25 2022