Parents Demand I Contribute My Money To Pregnant Sister's BABY FUND Because She Can't Afford Baby

what made you dislike your sibling my friend bought this special office chair that moulds to the person that uses it this chair is supposed to be really good for your back but the arms wouldn't fit under his desk he knew i didn't like my current office chair because it was uncomfortable and rickety so he gave the chair to me i replaced my office chair with it and i've been really enjoying it i think it's helped my posture a lot i did notice later that certain areas were getting flatter less form-fitting and uncomfortable i actually had to stop using it because it sort of hurt i thought maybe someone else had been using it so i asked my sister since we are the only ones that use the office she said she has that it really helped her back since she's been getting back pains lately i explained how the chair seat and back change form when other people use and asked her not to use it anymore because it was hurting me i then put the chair in the corner so it could hopefully go back to its normal shape like the website said it would after a couple of days of not using it a couple of weeks go by and i noticed that the cushion is still compressed i thought maybe my sister was still using it i decided to put it in my room since the office is getting turned into a nursery anyway the next day i noticed that there are drag marks on my bedroom carpet leading to the chair i talked to my sister about it again and just she says she needs it more since she works from home all day and i just use it while i'm drawing or playing games i also use it while doing my schoolwork my parents also think i need to let her use it because of her circumstances and say i should just use her chair but her chair is just as bad as my old one i told them she should just buy a better chair for herself since she has a job but they said it was too expensive and they all need to save money for her baby and i need to contribute too i feel like since i have to give up my time to do all the heavy duty chores now by myself i shouldn't have to give up my stuff too so i went and got a steering wheel lock and put it on the arms of the chair so she couldn't use it without the key she went absolutely ballistic threw the chair on the ground and now i'm grounded until i apologize and let her use the chair again edit i've gotten a few comments asking how old we are i'm three years younger than her my sister is 18. holy moly you are not the idiot might get down voted for this but your sister's pregnancy does not entitle her to such tantrums first of all it's your property since your friend gave it to you you've established that it's starting to hurt you when she keeps trying to use it but she's continually crossed the line by going behind your back to use it preparing for a baby is a hard financial and physical situation for a lot of people but it does not justify her throwing the chair you are not the idiot if she can't afford a chair how is she supposed to afford a baby her inability to engage in safe intimacy is not your responsibility or problem if negotiating is an issue i'd wager babysitting for literally everything your sister sounds like the type that would demand babysitting from you sure take the chair but if you ever leave me with the babysitting duty i will call cps for child abandonment because i will not babysit a single minute for you in case you're unaware there's a bunch of losers in cameroon who pretend to be part of the illuminati and message people on social media telling them they're invited and will receive benefits like a massive salary and be part of this secret and prestige organization after the initiation and registration fee of 666 of course there are various youtube videos of it and the whole thing is so ridiculous i don't know how anyone could fall for it but lo and behold my stupid sister did she actually transferred 660 dollars but the bank stopped the transfer detecting it as fraudulent she told us how she was joining that nonsense and needed our help which is how we found out by the way she's not a kid she's 21. i was talking to my brother and i said something like i've seen videos of these on youtube i can't believe there were people this stupid to fall for it it's horrifying someone related to us is dumb enough to fall for it my sister overheard it and started crying and went to our mom parents said i needed to apologize and i said no what she did was the dumbest thing i've ever seen anyone do and i'm not going to sugarcoat it who does this this crap was even more obvious than the prince one most of my family is saying i'm an idiot for that but we shouldn't be comforting my sister we should be shaming her and letting her know that what she did was so stupid my god you are not the idiot i would have done the exact same thing your sister is so stupid she's 21 and fell for that crap even my 80 year old grandma could see from space it was a scam you were right to call her out at least she's unlikely to do it again just to be safe though take it as an opportunity to educate here there are loads of articles online about how to spot a scam as some more convincing ones might still get her you are the idiot you're not wrong that she was dumb but your sister is now very well aware how dumb she was she's likely terribly upset to see herself diminished in how you regard her you may be right that she's stupid but you don't have to be cruel you're 100 correct that the term applies to her but it's mean and you can be right and kind at the same time or you can just be right and you're choosing to just be right if you were to have done the same thing if someone had somehow got you to act completely against your own self-interest and then you felt utterly humiliated by it and then how would you feel if the people that are supposed to lift you up took joy in your error just salt in the wound my brother's been dating this girl julie for sixish months they live quite far so we have never met julie i'm living with my parents at the moment brother and julie arrived last weekend for a two-week visit brother gave us the heads up before they came that julie didn't like to be touched when they arrived we hugged brother but respected her space and gave her a friendly wave i honestly didn't have any sort of issue and i don't think my parents did either throughout this week though it's become very clear that this isn't just a normal boundary julie is extreme in her reactions no one is intentionally touched her mind you there was an instant today where my dad brushed up against her in the kitchen and she had a complete fit she was hyperventilating and freaking out brother managed it since he was right there but it was pretty concerning since then the entire house has been walking on eggshells around her if you so much as walk in her direction she will take this deep audible breath and just stare wide-eyed making eye contact with her is 50 50 on whether she will start to get all freaked out now the house is pretty small it's quite difficult for five adults to operate when one of them is a step away from a conniption we have all tried our best over the week to accommodate her but it's definitely gotten on everyone's nerves last night my parents were confiding to me how uncomfortable they were in their own home i feel the same obviously it's not that julie doesn't want to be touched it's that she always assumes we're trying to touch her whenever we look at her or walk in her direction it's incredibly tense to be in the same space as her because she looks at you like you're some monster trying to hurt her i decided to talk to my brother today and ask if julie was okay he insisted that julie is totally fine and apparently having a good time he straight-up refused to acknowledge that she was making us uncomfortable and basically told me to get lost i waited till the evening and talked to julie i managed to catch her alone and talk to her from a distance i basically just said that the family has all been really uncomfortable with her reactions again not that she doesn't like touching but that she is so extreme in her fear towards us i tried to be sympathetic and kind in my words but she did not react well she started crying and just said that she didn't know we hated her what and she was doing her best i ended up just apologizing for mentioning an escape to my room my brother came to yell at me shortly after that he gave me a thorough telling off and basically called me a huge idiot i haven't spoken to my parents but i'm pretty confident they would be on my side here from a third party perspective am i the idiot if we had known how serious julie's issues were we definitely would have asked they got a hotel my brother really downplayed it to us you are not the idiot your brother is the idiot he knew how extreme her reaction to an accidental touch is he shouldn't have brought her especially for so long to your home which she presumably knew was small and would make accommodating her extreme needs difficult and that her paranoia would make anyone uncomfortable in their own home if someone's behavior is making you uncomfortable in your own home no less you have a right to discuss it with them politely sounds like brother is either blind to the level of her reactions or in denial my fiance and i have been together for several years in the past my fiance genuinely made several efforts to try and connect with my family especially my parents but they weren't very interested in forming a personal relationship with her and she respected their boundaries my family is polite and nice enough to her but there is practically no relationship my sister's late husband seemed to be the favorite in-law to my family especially my parents he was the perfect package i barely see my family but the favorite in-law fact did make gatherings very awkward when my parents would take more of an interest in his personal life over my fiances dismiss her in favour of him or cut her off entirely from conversation in order to hear him speak he always tried to help my fiance get back into the conversation tried to make sure he wasn't dominating the conversation etc he was a great guy but the blatant favoritism did make things slightly uncomfortable my sister was hosting a relatively small gender reveal party this party was technically the first time we would have been all together since my late brother-in-law's funeral midway through the party my fiance gets a phone call and excuses herself to a spare bedroom to take the call almost 20 minutes pass and she hasn't come out of the room so i go to check on her turns out her dad has just died in the hospital she was very close to her dad and i can't imagine what that must have felt like for her she was softly crying for 10 minutes on the floor i ask her if she wants to go home at first she tries to convince me that she's ok that she will just fix her makeup and hope no one notices her eyes she kept saying i'm fine when she wasn't really fine after a few moments of silence she says she wants to go home but asks me to make an excuse for leaving prematurely we come out of the bedroom when she's ready and i make up an excuse about how my fiance wasn't feeling well at first it was mostly harmless are you sure you can't stay or even until the gender reveal i kept shaking my head no and without too much hassle we went back home the night of the gender reveal i got a bunch of angry text messages about how my fiance could have just sucked it up or how my fiance was taking advantage of me and accused me of not supporting my sister enough during the hardest emotional period of her life my fiance feels terrible and ended up apologizing formally with the fruit basket and a couple of gift cards to my sister's favorite places on top of our original gift it was thoughtful but my fiancee's gifts are starting to make me feel guilty for making her leave you are not the idiot no one else in your family is going to prioritize your fiance but they will make sure that your sister is taken care of keep taking care of your partner if an apology won't suffice it's on them you are so not wrong her father died she owes your disgusting family nothing text them back fiance's father died sis pregnancy does not trump that my place is by her side get over it or get over me being part of your lives you have already treated the light crap on your shoe and i'm sick of it grow up unpopular opinion but you are wrong dude classic mistake you pinned it on your fiancee even though it's true that it was because she needed to leave always put the blame on yourself when around your family you already knew that their relationship is strained and yet even when you kind of lied about the real reason for leaving you still weren't kind enough to at least lie that you needed to go so your family wouldn't have any more fuel against her even if my partner is the one that needs to go i make a point to say i need to leave so that it's never on him and he never comes off to my family that he is not wanting to spend time with them or being inconsiderate you are the idiot but more like a bone-headed clueless idiot not a malicious one my family my mom dad's sister 23 and i 19 female all moved to the us from finland for my dad's work five years ago my sister stayed in finland though saying she wanted to finish schooling this was a lie as she was secretly pregnant and dropped out and we found out soon after we moved parents took care of money for her and we moved her here parents bought us a cheap car to share i was too young to drive sister wasn't in school or work but drove me to school i started working at young age and she convinced them to force me to give her 75 percent of my money towards car gas and maintenance i gave around 2 300 or so and it only ever got a 50 battery and she still used money my dad gave her for gas she told my parents i wasn't giving her money or blowing it and they believed her few years later i'm 18 in my senior year sister gets told that since my nephew is about four and enrolled to go to head start during the day she needed to get a job suddenly she gets pregnant found out she lied to the guy about being on birth control the father took off i'm now in university i finished year one barely due to global issue last semester lucky enough seventy to eighty percent of my school is paid for through grants and scholarship parents give me one hundred dollars a month to help i ended up buying another car with the money i secretly saved from my first real job waitressing mostly tips i could hide easier i used the car for last of hs and first year of college my living situation here changed and global situation changed and i don't really need my car here covered it took my keys my parents supported my sister getting a locksmith and getting my title out of there safe so she could approve them making a key for it she just got pregnant again too i got two speeding camera tickets and realized what was doing i was so angry i told them i was going to come get the car she gets in a wreck just days later while drunk other driver actually at fault though sis got a dui i was supposed to get car from body shop sister ends up finding an expired old id of mine and picks up the car i found out through a friend who lives close by right away about seeing my sister driving it sent keys to my friend she picked up car and took it to a house so i could come get it sister finds out and finds the car takes it i report it stolen she's found at new boyfriends with the car and high with herbs on her gets charged for the theft and possession the family consensus is that i'm a selfish piece of crap that i've ruined my sisters and even my mom and dad's lives even back home my grandmother is my only supporter i've blocked everyone and sent back the hundred dollars my mom sent me on the first telling her to give it to my sister i have to admit i'm pretty resolute in my position and don't believe i'm the idiot here i've honestly never felt more relieved than this last week where i'm no longer in the family social media group chats or getting calls and voicemails constantly am i the idiot oh my god not the idiot get all of your natural documents passport birth certificate and important documents car title and lock your identity down your sister can destroy your credit if she takes out cards in your name to pay for a new car your family supporting her is trash that took itself out make sure to report that the car was stolen when the damage happened you can do this you are not the idiot your sister is a menace a drunk driver and a thief you're in the right here i don't know why your family is blaming you for her poor behavior seems like they made their choice to believe and support her over you so now they'll live with the consequences like sister getting deported and the parents winding up with three little kids i 26 male have an elder brother jake 28. basically our mother died six months ago and in her will she split her estate quite a large sum worth over 1 million euros in two my half i received immediately but my brother staff was held in trust with me as the trustee my mother's wish was for me to keep this money until a time that i thought jake wouldn't waste it all at once on partying and buying sugar but use it productively for his future despite my brother being in his late 20s he still spends all his time clubbing and honestly has never really got his life on track he never visited our mum on her deathbed which is something i will always resent him for jake was obviously not happy with this and began pestering me to give him the money immediately he began being really nasty with me and increasingly threatened me to give him the money i later found out that he had gotten into debt from gambling and had been counting on the money he was going to get from our mother's imminent death to pay it off i did not feel like this was in line with our mum's wishes as she wanted me to save the money so that he would spend it on starting a family or a deposit on a house etc so i refused to give it to him me and my brother have a really terrible relationship he bullied me viciously when we were younger amongst other things for me being gay autistic and adopted i find his insults particularly hurtful about me being adopted and this is something he said to me a lot in the last few months i'm not her real son therefore i don't deserve any of our mother's inheritance let alone keeping half from her real son for my part i was not happy that our mum had given me the burden of looking after this money and rather my mother had just given jake the money so i would never have to talk to him again jake has done lots of things to try to force me to give him his half of the inheritance the harshest was when he stole our mum's wedding ring from my house when i was hosting our mother's wake she had left me the ring so that i could propose to my long-term boyfriend jake said he would give it me back if i gave him his half of the inheritance i didn't and he ended up pawning the ring i've been given a job offer from a different country and i'm gonna take it it will basically be impossible for jake to contact or visit me i am also going to keep the inheritance for myself this is going against my mum's wishes which is why i am likely the idiot however if i gave him the money now i would also be going against my mum's wishes and honestly i cannot bear to give him the money after how horrible he has been towards me i am not sure what to do my boyfriend a mum's sister both support me keeping the money and i think my mother would support the decision too the only alternative is keeping it in trust forever for my mental health i cannot keep in touch with him long term in order to properly fulfill my mother's wishes i feel bad but i cannot give my brother the money am i wrong you are wrong this is greasy and foolish greasy your mother intended that money to go to him she didn't say hold it six months but if he still hasn't got it together by then or he's being a pain in the butt just keep it come on foolish it could be that your mother's will won't prevent him from getting the money if you appoint a trustee but that will is the document the courts will use so if you think it doesn't actually stipulate that the money can be withheld from him you're going to eventually get taken to court over this where you'll lose that's doubly so if you don't just withhold the money without a legal right to but actually steal it and cut off contact instead you

Channel: XO

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Keywords: reddit, reddit stories, ask reddit, askreddit, reddit girl, reddit woman, reddit real voice, r/aita, r/mil, ask guru, reddit parents, reddit family, reddit entitled parents, reddit sister, reddit pregnancy, reddit relationship advice, reddit sister pregnant, reddit spoiled sister, reddit baby fund

Id: S-SSQY-4RqM

Length: 20min 8sec (1208 seconds)

Published: Fri Sep 18 2020