OCD3: OCD & Sexuality

[Music] so see the effects things that are emotionally relevant to people and so sexuality is often one of those things that is very important to many people so OCD can grab ahold of that in a multiple different ways one of them is sexual orientation OCD which is where one fears that one is homosexual or if they already are homosexual they fear that they might be heterosexual and they just fear that they are the the opposing sexuality that they are relationship OCD where one is concerned or doubts whether they are attracted to or in love with their partner and pedophile OCD which is when people fear that or sufferers feel fear being around children and fear that they might harm a child so all of these center around the theme of sexuality and one sexuality and what one is either going to turn into or what they're capable of all of these tend to have perfectionism or some features of perfectionism within the context of the OCD is having this higher moral standard of one's thinking oftentimes we will believe that they have the control over their brains thinking and so when their brain produces a thought that they're not in agreement with what if I might be a the brain kind of ceases that thought and says you know attaches a fear statement to that and it becomes a topic of the OCD which is worrying whether or not you're going to become gay or worrying whether or not you're capable of harming a child so these types of OCD center around sexuality and and and the fears of becoming or a moralistic in some with sexual orientation OCD when somebody is questioning you know what if I'm gay is am i ruining my partner's life you know am i pretending to be a good spouse and pretending to want to have kids when I really want to be off with another person and should I break up with him now to spare them of that there could be troubling for the individual themselves in that you know they don't that's not the value system that they ascribe to so if I I don't want to be homosexual but what if I am with pedophile OCD it can damage the relationships or cause avoidance in their relationships with one's own child so you may ask your spouse to change the diapers you may ask your spouse to never leave the room when you're playing with your child or you may avoid your child altogether or you may avoid certain streets in New York where there are schools certain places on the subway so what happens is kind of this big scale of avoidance of the feared stimuli so whether it's children or whether it's the relationship they become kind of the central topic piece [Music] so a lot of sufferers who experience intrusive thoughts while having sex may tend to avoid sex with their partner they may tend to find excuses to not have sex with their partner because and that can over time whittle away at the intimacy of a couple and so it you know one thing is to encourage despite having those thoughts to continue on with the sexuality with with the sexual experiences with your partner instead of avoiding them because over time that can be you know hurtful to a spouse they may not understand why the intimacy has gone or why they're being avoided it and that is a central part of a healthy relationship an example of an OCD thought that might take somebody out of the moment when they're having sex is a man having sex with his girlfriend who right in the middle of sex has a thought of his best friend his male best friend and pictures him naked and suddenly needs to stop having sex or having a client I have has a thought where every time she goes to have sex she thinks of a family member of hers she thinks of her brother or her father and that thought is very very very scary to her and so she avoids dating or having any type of sexual relations with a man because she's so afraid of having a thought of her brother or her father during any kind of sexual event it can also occur during masturbation is having a thought of during masturbation of a child anything that pops into the brain that one doesn't want a child or another man or for a female if she's having sex with her partner or having sex with her husband a thought of another female all of these can can be scary if you experience an intrusive thought while having sex continue the course try to stay in it as much as possible try to allow the thought to be there mindfulness and acceptance of that thought while you're having sex and try to push on it may take you out of the moment for a second or a couple of minutes or you may not feel that you're a hundred percent connected in that moment but that's okay not everybody even people who don't suffer from OCD are connected into sex in the moment if you ask many people having sex or or a housewife she's thinking about doing the laundry or you know driving the kids to school it's a Miss it's a faulty assumption to believe that when you're having sex that you should be a hundred percent in the moment and so there are other intrusive thoughts that are going to come in and out and so do the more you can accept them the easier there'll be to kind of filter through [Music]

Channel: MadeOfMillions

Views: 132,455

Keywords: mental health, ocd, ocd therapy, ocd treatment, anxiety, anxiety disorders, intrusive thoughts, sexuality, sexual orientation

Id: YTikYoEqAF0

Length: 6min 4sec (364 seconds)

Published: Tue Dec 19 2017