My Biggest Scandal Yet

I am currently involved in my biggest Scandal yet and I I want to immediately just start trying to pour water on the Flames here so put your pitchforks down and let me explain just just simmer down all right hold your horses as all of you know today is 4 20 of course weed day whatever but also it's The Purge on Twitter the check mark Purge anyone that isn't subscribed to Twitter blue has just had their check marks banished to the shadow realm they're gone the whole Legacy checkmark system has been kaput they've wiped their ass with it now that all is left is the embarrassing eight dollars a month being flushed right down the [ __ ] for a useless service unless of course you're a business that's paying a thousand dollars a month for a gold check mark or a politician who gets the gray one the only blue check marks left are the Twitter blue subscribers and it's led to a lot of questions about me personally because if you go to my Twitter you'll notice something very yucky very stinky there's a bit of a blemish on my Twitter account there's still a blue check mark there as my fourth grade English teacher used to say honesty is the best policy and man this is a painful one I I don't have a check mark because they let me be grandfathered in with like a legacy check mark or anything like that it's not like they allowed me to persist past the Doomsday here I wasn't some kind of crafty Neanderthal caveman who took shelter when the asteroid hit the earth that took out the dinosaurs and I survived or anything I have a check mark because I subscribe to Twitter blue it is the most embarrassing thing I've ever done and please let me explain I've made a lot of content laughing at Twitter and most importantly laughing directly at the whole idea of paying money for a service as dog [ __ ] as Twitter so this leads to the Natural question why with the way people have been tagging me like you know with tears in their eyes crying about you know why Charlie why have you forsaken us why do you still have the blue check mark what went wrong it feels like I just [ __ ] stole Christmas like the Grinch so please allow me to explain because I have I have a good reason damn it so like I said I've made a lot of videos talking about a lot of Twitter goofiness uh and of course one of those topics was Twitter blue as just an idea like paying for Twitter is one of the stupidest things you could ever really do it's like paying to have someone spit down your throat every day it's just it's a silly idea but the reason I paid for it is because on stream a couple of people brought up a good point after they popped Elon musk's wiener out of their mouth they texted some [ __ ] in chat that actually made a lot of sense they said how can you criticize Twitter blue if you're not going to use it how can you know for sure that it's a terrible service with nothing redeeming about it if you yourself aren't going to engage with it and I actually thought about that for a second it was like that [ __ ] onion article like the guy everyone hates just made a really good point and ultimately I agreed with their perspective I can't fully write off Twitter blue if I don't actually know everything that's going on with it since I wouldn't be using it so probably about two months ago now I took the plunge and made one of the most difficult decisions of my life like this honestly felt like I was about to decide you know whether or not to pull a family member off life support or something it was [ __ ] painful it was emotional I was nearly like crying my eyes out about to part with eight dollars for [ __ ] Twitter an actual swamp Cesspool of degeneracy but I did it I I subscribed to Twitter blue about two months ago and that's when I learned the truth my third eye was opened I was [ __ ] right I could Now wiggle my finger and say I told you so that Twitter blue is useless because I was Now using it and could confirm for sure that currently Twitter blue is worthless it offers nothing of value at all it is just wasting money subscribing to Twitter blue at least in its current iteration and the all of the memes about like this [ __ ] paid for Twitter I think that's totally fair I think that's super accurate you deserve to be shamed if you're paying for something like Twitter blue right now because there is no reason to there is literally no reason to it is literally a Boy Scout badge just to get bullied publicly and nothing else you don't have access to any useful tools you don't have access to any useful features I'm gonna go over everything you get with Twitter blue right now so you can see the full scope of just how meaningless it is maybe in the future there'll be some like implementations or changes that make it worthwhile Elon Musk certainly seems to think so he's constantly trying to drum a pipe for Twitter blue like pumping his fist saying like all of these incredible Things Are coming very soon any day now they're right around the corner that's got to be the longest [ __ ] Street of all time if we still haven't got around that corner because there is still nothing on the horizon it doesn't appear like anything's coming anytime soon right now it's honestly just kind of sad I feel like I'm eating it alone at the lunch tables with all the other losers that have Twitter blue right now we're just the outcasts getting laughed at and we absolutely deserve it you know this is like I threw a birthday party and nobody showed up except my parents and they gave me like a little participation trophy here present with my [ __ ] Twitter blue check mark it's so embarrassing now let's go over what Twitter blue offers as a paying cuck of Twitter blue I have the ability to send out a tweet and then the option to undo it immediately send it or wait for this countdown to finish in order for the Tweet to go through this is I guess if I have a lot of immediate anxiety and regret after clicking tweet I can undo it within a certain period of time but let's say I want to let it rip and it's up there and I changed my mind while I have that coveted edit feature where I can edit the Tweet to change things around or add to it within the first 30 minutes of the Tweet being live now I'm sure all of you with your thinking caps on will immediately recognize why that feature's [ __ ] worthless because it's Twitter if you regret something or you decide you don't really want it up or if you want to add something to it you can just delete the Tweet it's not that big of a deal it's Twitter it's instant to do that there's no penalty for it you don't have like a certain allotted amount of tweets that you're allowed to post like there's no quota you can just tweet it be like yeah that's kind of a stinker delete no problems editing a tweet is [ __ ] worthless unless you're trying to like prank your followers where Everyone likes or retweets something really agreeable and then you edit it to say something really nefarious and evil so then it makes them look silly for retweeting it I guess but past that there is no practicality to editing a tweet within the first 30 minutes you could just delete it and accomplish the same goal a lot of the things you'll find on the FAQs for Twitter blue are absolutely Beyond stupid that I'm not even gonna bother talking about them so I'm just going to focus on the bigger ones another one that they talk about as being a great benefit is you get half as many ads you pay eight dollars to still get ads but just not as many and I'll tell you as a two-month veteran of Twitter blue I haven't noticed a difference in my ad volume I am still constantly inundated with ads while scrolling through I really feel like that claim might just be a blatant lie because it's something that you couldn't really empirically prove super well as just a Twitter blue user you wouldn't be like huh my ad density is exactly the same because they could always argue like no it's actually reduced you're wrong and you would have no way of proving it but going from not subscribing to Twitter blue to subscribing to Twitter blue the ad is the ads is exactly the same nothing has changed on that front at all and any noticeable meaningful way so that's [ __ ] worthless there's no reason to be paying eight dollars a month to still be getting ads in the same amount of ads the edit button is worthless the undo tweet is worthless the extra amount of text that you can add to a tweet I guess could be useful for journalists and really journalists alone but even then you still might be better off just doing a reply because I know most people aren't clicking expand and show more for like a large long tweet at least I don't think it's that common but I could see maybe a bit of practicality for it but not for eight dollars a month and not unless you are an actual journalist whose job it is to try and like convey news through tweets uh longer videos who gives a [ __ ] especially since there's no video monetization right now that Elon Musk keeps hyping up so you don't really see any return on those videos on the platform so if you're trying to be like a Twitter content creator you're actually just getting [ __ ] Donuts here goose eggs zero dollars in return from posting the content now he does keep talking about how he wants Twitter to be a platform for Content creators who subscribe to Twitter blue so he wants to be able to monetize that content so maybe eventually that might be something worthwhile but right now it's just literally not there at all and really the only other big feature that's currently here that I've seen a bit of Buzz about is the subscriptions which is a paid thing where followers can pay to subscribe to your Twitter which is cuckoldry even more shameful than subscribing the Twitter blue in the first place uh I think this is beyond embarrassing and worthless this is [ __ ] tragic if anyone actually subscribes to a [ __ ] Twitter account but here's how it works so a follower of someone with Twitter blue can subscribe to their tweets for five dollars a month and as a Twitter blue user you can see what you stand to gain if uh whatever percentage of followers sign up for this so on mine it has this really misleading [ __ ] about how much money can you make with subscriptions well if only two percent of your followers sign up at five dollars a month you get 252.4 K per month which is crazy that is a huge huge huge amount of money right there and this is like that classic if everyone watching this video sends me a dollar I'll Be A Millionaire type thing like it's [ __ ] stupid this is very misleading and manipulative there is zero percent chance that two percent of any single Twitter account would ever subscribe to them for five dollars a month it's just it's not gonna happen I would wager a guess that point zero zero zero zero zero zero one percent of any accounts followers would even consider paying five dollars a month to subscribe to them especially because there's no benefit to them for doing it there is no real reason for it this is what subscribers get they get a badge whoopee and then bonus content with unscripted thoughts ideas and opinions with extra tweets and personal replies oh so you mean just more normal tweets every [ __ ] tweet is just an unhinged unscripted thought for the most part and then it just says more features coming soon they couldn't even find something else to round this out with it just like yeah and then maybe we'll think of other things so you actually get nothing for it two percent of your followers will never subscribe to this it is a complete pipe dream so I'm not turning on subscribers like I don't need to actually take the plunge on that one to know how worthless it is I'm not going to bother now I know Mr Beast has subscribers on and they've been like really pumping out notified applications to let people know that they should subscribe to them which is super weird but I do know there are people that are turning it on and I just I'm very curious on how that's going for them because I can't imagine it being super successful when there is no benefit to subscribing to them you get nothing at least on something like twitch you can get emotes which build the community and people get excited about that but even there I think emotes are pretty weak as like something that you receive for a transaction it's mainly just to show support to a streamer you like which I guess you can make the same argument for Twitter but you're still just getting absolutely nothing of value out of it and to show support to that Twitter user I'm assuming they have other platforms anyway that are more direct to them that you would probably be better off showing support through those as opposed to Twitter itself now this is like the last main feature with Twitter blue that I wanted to discuss in this video here I just think it's completely worthless right now even if this was a dollar a month I would say that it's a waste of a dollar it's just truly not worth any amount of money because none of this is useful that's not to say that it can't be in the future sure I do recognize this is still very early this is still like a very primitive build of Twitter blue so maybe down the line there's going to be some practicality and some benefit to some of this [ __ ] and it might be worth money then like maybe then it would be a worthwhile subscription service but right now not even close and everyone that does have Twitter blue deserves to get laughed at for being financially irresponsible here because it is just absolutely not worth it like I said could be down the line but from everything I have access to with Twitter blue right now it is far from a good service so I wanted to explain why I still have Twitter blue I really do think it is important that if I am going to be uh talking about a service like this that I need to at least be subscribed to the service to have a full understanding of how it all works that is the only reason that I have Twitter blue and I'm wasting money on it so that way I can be as knowledgeable as possible on the subject so hopefully that explains all of that that's really about it see ya

Channel: penguinz0

Views: 2,514,528

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Id: SN11Ia8T438

Length: 12min 37sec (757 seconds)

Published: Fri Apr 21 2023