Molly Ivins and Ann Richards on Letterman, 1991 & 1992

[Music] [Applause] [Music] 1963 four i would say a little later than that thank you very much our next guest is one of the most outspoken political columnists in the nation today and we have a collection of her writing it can be found in this just published book entitled molly ivins can't say that can she ladies and gentlemen here she is molly ivins you're uh you're uh from texas are you originally from texas oh yeah yeah what part uh east texas graduated from high school in houston and and what what does uh what do the folks in east texas make of uh what we've just come through this weekend and the week before with the judiciary committee hearings and all of that what what what does that mean it does raise the always timely question is god punishing us uh as a connoisseur of political lunacy i'd give it an 8.2 right fairly edifying to see a bunch of united states senators on national television discussing dongs and rests i think we live in a great nation it's occasional resemblance to a large lunatic asylum is uh purely coincidental yeah it's actually one of our more endearing national characteristics but but if uh see now i look at that and and i don't feel like i have a grasp of the core issue of what just transpired i mean the guy's now part of the supreme court okay so what's left what as we're sifting through the ashes what can we hang on to what can we learn how can we make ourselves better from the experience here we can't okay uh let's talk about the title of the book here molly ivins can't say that can she what is that referring to oh when i first started writing my political column i felt impelled to describe the performance of a local congressman by saying if his iq slips any lower we'll have to water him twice a day right it upset a lot of his supporters and uh they canceled their subscriptions and threatened to start boycotts and so my paper took out billboards all around dallas texas that said molly ivan's can't say that can she and uh and are you are you beloved by the folks who read the paper or is it split right down the middle some hate you some love you how does that go they do polls every year that uh to find out who's the best-liked and most hated columnist in the area i'm always both well that's good that's the appropriate balance then isn't it a and uh what what is the state of texas politics these days how are things a lot of scandals not so many scandals well the speaker's under indictment again but that's that's normal where we are right we did have one oh 73 to 75 who wasn't indicted he was shot to death by his wife she wasn't indicted however um and and now you're not troubled by this kind of thing and i guess it's because it's part of your your livelihood what is the most uh aggressive or egregious political violation you've witnessed or reported or lived through well on the lunacy scale i suppose the mike martin episode state representative mike martin was elected from longview texas on a platform being pro-family and pro-american um he was legislatively impaired unable to pass a single bill so he looked dicey for re-election and he came up with a really unusual strategy paid his cousin to shoot him in the arm with a shotgun and then claimed it had been done by a satanic and communistic cult on account of his so pro-family and pro-american well it turned out our legislature had with great foresight made it illegal to pay someone to shoot you in the great state of texas and without representative martin became wanted by the law we had to send the texas rangers after him because he went into hiding they hunted him high hunting him low at last they tracked him to earth at his mama's house found him hiding in the stereo cabinet he always did want to be a speaker yeah so well uh what do you uh what do you make of uh dan quayle now i probably have been as guilty as anyone uh of of abusing him and making fun of him and being unfair to him but it's you know you can't really help yourself i know there's uh there is a widespread impression that uh the press is unfair to quell i mean we all noticed early on the guy is not the brightest porsche cloud on the block uh and there's been a feeling that the press has unfairly stereotyped him and and really not giving him a chance i'm i must tell you honestly i traveled with him during the 88 campaign i found him dumber than advertised really horrifying thought but i honestly think if you put that man's brain in a bumblebee it would fly backwards [Applause] now do you ever do you ever for a second in a stroke of conscience do you ever consider if if things were reversed if there was some odd parallel universe and someone was saying things like that about me how would i endure that this this man has lived the last four years being assaulted like that and and and worse well see my theory is i only make fun of politicians and they all volunteer to stand in a free fire zone and uh it's not my fault so you're completely exonerated then no problem all right let's do a commercial we'll be right back here [Applause] [Music] okay here the book is called molly ivan's can't say that can she and uh probably selling pretty well isn't it yeah it seems to be pleasure to meet you thank you very much for being on the program uh my thanks also to uh jeff stilson and uh jeff daniels tomorrow night ladies and gentlemen richard simmons will return good night everybody [Applause] [Music] coming up next mark harmon from the new nbc series reasonable doubts stays up later with bob costas [Applause] [Music] [Applause] nominate this will ya thank you very much you know who i think you make an excellent president the guy who used to captain the love boat what was his name oh captain stupid i think he'd make a divine president a horrific president you know one of the crew of the love boat is actually in congress or something uh fred grant yeah the gopher yeah yeah he's a governor uh uh a senator from congressman from nebraska hey thank you very much hey hey and welcome to jeopardy um but i'd like to see that captain stubbing there because he's got the military background yeah the captain the character as president not gavin mccloud the actor no no no no the captain is sleeping himself yeah and then that spelling could run the campaign for him that would be an old romance lingering we have the governor of texas and richards uh we'll be out here a little bit later i'm very i'm a combination of nervous and very very excited because uh you can't help but have a lot of respect for this woman and her accomplishments in the world and we're excited to have her here tonight and and what could be a more timely circumstance than when the democratic convention is excuse me just down the uh down the road there and uh tonight uh there will be a placing bill clinton's name in nomination for uh president of the united states who who's making that nomination speech cuomo mario cuomo there you go right there uh here is the top ten list for tonight from the home office in tahlequah oklahoma ladies and gentlemen boys and girls moms and dads and kids of all ages the category top 10 signs you won't be re-elected president top 10 signs now that you will not be re-elected president here we go number 10 at fundraising dinners guests ask you can we have some more butter please number nine uh whenever you use phrase if i'm reelected in speech crowd burst into ten minutes of uproarious laughter number eight your wife keeps reassuring you that she can get work as a mall santa number seven number seven quails on your ticket number six uh number six when you ask your campaign manager for advice he shrugs and says beats me number five uh carvel turns their president bush cake into bushy the whale number four instead of four more years supporters chant six more months number three your pinhead son loses three billion dollars in savings and loan scandal number two number two your state of the union address is preempted by a who's the boss-a-thon [Applause] i like that number two my personal favorite and the number one sign you won't be a re-elected president other beat you in polls there you go [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] okay all right let's bring it right out here our first guest is uh probably uh best remembered for her remark four years ago that george bush was born with a silver foot in his mouth this year she is the chairperson of the democratic convention ladies and gentlemen please welcome the governor of texas and richards [Applause] [Music] nice to see you pleasure to meet you what have you there governor this is a democrat potato how so spelled with an o spelled with an o thank you very much because you know i'm always hungry little memento of the convention let me uh let me talk to you about a couple of things first of all did i make a faux pas there when i introduced you at the top of the program as the first lady of texas is that not a correct way to refer to you as long as i'm governor it doesn't matter what you say all right all right now uh in the introduction here when you just came out i referred to the quote from your speech at the convention four years ago which kind of lifted the roof off of the place yeah and you said uh the only problem with george bush is he was born with a silver foot in his mouth yeah now uh george is is more or less a texan isn't he claims some connection to the state has a residence there he has a hotel room there yeah a texas hotel room now that hotel has gone bankrupt of course in this past four years it hasn't been that much before right the important thing is four years later i can say i told you so did you uh did you have you talked to george did you ever talk to george have you had any kind of relationship with him how do you get along with the man just great really yeah and how do you respond to that remark well i don't know i never asked him uh he sent me a silver foot a pen yeah that says bush on it and i wear it when he comes to the state cause i think well a lady always wears a gentleman's jewelry when he comes uh but he has a pretty good sense of humor um he was there this year when i spoke at the gridiron show in washington and he laughed a lot because it was a really good speech i would imagine so yeah uh well let's talk a little bit about that is if you can now step down from being uh governor step down from being the chairperson of the convention step down from being a a lifelong democrat i assume uh are these guys done is george really done is it over are we are we looking at the end of the republican reign here now i think the phrase is stick a fork in them they're done oh but do you want to know that i mean that's a good line but the honest to god truth is i don't know uh i i can't um i can't imagine that they're going to be able to hang on i mean people are out of work uh the country's ox is in a ditch uh i'm sorry the country's ox is in a ditch the country's oxygen well it has to do with the difficulty of removing a beast of that size from a dick um so i think um you know come november we'll know this is a peculiar election year i mean it's incredible by any measurement uh they told me uh when i came in here that ed rollins had quit the perot campaign so that makes us all wonder whether perot's going to hang on or not and if he doesn't what does that really mean to the democrats and what does it mean to the republicans because we've all kind of now got our mouth set for a three-way race right right and there'd be a lot of um scratching a heads and refiguring if he's not going to stay in there let me ask you this okay let's assume now that we are in so much trouble and somebody has to go a change has to be made yeah uh and let's say that your boys come in uh uh bill and al yeah how do you how do you feel about that ticket are you comfortable with those guys i feel real good about clinton's ability to govern uh but i tell you in this whole business of politics it's kind of a schizophrenic activity one skill is the getting elected the political skills that's right and the other skill is the governing skill uh i know that bill clinton can govern well i've seen him i've watched him he's in a neighboring state he's done a good job um the big question is whether or not they can put the campaign together and get him elected all right so but let's assume for a second that they do get him elected he is the new president yeah will that team be able to do what it what it was that bush and quayle have been unable to do absolutely get the ox out of the ditch i think so do you honestly believe that yeah yeah i think that the public is so angry and so furious with government and i think that both the congress and the nominees have gotten the message that they're going to act very quickly and if you don't put together a program in the first hundred days in your in you're in office it really doesn't happen the bureaucracy just sort of swells up and takes over again that's right um and wouldn't this have been a good year wouldn't this have been a great year wouldn't this so far been the most appropriate suitable year not that heretofore we haven't had plenty of suitable opportunities to put a woman on the ticket well i didn't think it was um there are not very many of us that are prepared to be president and i think when you choose someone vice president it should be someone who's prepared to take over there are a couple of women maybe patsy schroeder maybe barbara mikulski at least they've had the federal experience and been there for a while um but there are some other combinations to figure that is electability compatibility and i think al gore was probably a good choice now there's a lot more women in the pipeline coming up we're going to elect a lot of women senators this fall i don't i don't know why but i i kind of like the sound of the phrase having a lot of women in the pipeline i'm not even sure what that means i don't know what that means but if you're going to put an ox in a dance put some women in the pipeline let's see if we can't do some irrigation uh we we have to do a commercial and then we'll be back here with the governor [Applause] later everyone nice to see you the governor of texas is here ann richards richard simmons will be out here and also blake clark uh the governor asked me about some equipment we have here and i turned on the bubble machines that would be great for the governor's mansion don't you think oh it's dynamite i think it looks more like the congress ladies and gentlemen one day all talk shows will be like this uh and also you wanted to do this i do all right be careful there you go i love that i want to ask you one more a question about the democrats and the chances and so forth in 92 and then we'll go on to other things talk about anything you want i was watching your opening speech when you uh i guess opened up the festivities there at the garden and uh there was a you referred to one of your grandchildren and you were talking about do you remember the feeling you had the first time you went to grade school and everything was unknown and it was a combination of trepidation and grand excitement and the unknown and how would it be you got the message that's right now you were suggesting that that's the feeling that the this great union of ours should have collectively uh do we have in this ticket people to generate or inspire that feeling oh probably so really it depends on how receptive you are david these guys you guys are so skeptical of anything but some miracle maker you know that it's going to be difficult for any politician to convince you that they're going to do wonderful things that's right but see i'm telling you where i got this impression yeah was your words in your speech i said to myself you know she's right that would be great let's see that happen yeah so i'm i'm not the one expecting more than you are certainly well i got my fingers crossed yeah um i think they can do that to do it you really have to be focused and you have to be very disciplined and you have to hit that message hard all the time and do i think they'll do that probably so i think the democrats are really hungry yeah and that makes a lot of difference be uh before before the acceptance speech or at some time when clinton and gore are in the garden together will you drop by the dressing room just stick your head in and say okay boys don't screw it up will you give them one of those i've already done that uh you know i uh it's a big kick having you here and uh there's many many other things we could chat about i'm really interested in what life is like uh politically these days in texas uh but we're out of time and i know you've got to go back to the garden no it just makes me sick i've got a lot of stuff they told me i'm supposed to tell you and i didn't get a chance you can come back tomorrow if you want you're going to be in town the rest of the week the incredible thing though that i do have to tell you is that people from texas complain that once they leave texas they can't ever get any more barbecue that's any good and i want you to know the stuff follows me everywhere i go i went here i am in new york city and i went to the most splendid posh powerful party i've ever been to in my life at the russian tea room last night and guess what they had yeah they did barbecue barbecue at the russian tea room so you just pretty much had it coming out your ears st louis south dakota you name it i leave town and they order barbecue yeah if if you if the ordering were left up to you what would you rather have outside of texas oh probably steam dumplings oh okay see if we can get her a load of steamed dumplings those are very light on the stomach too uh we want you to come to texas i'd love to come together listen no kidding we're big fans down there new yorkers all interested in me going to texas uh what now by the time this is on the air tonight you will have had another really big night tonight's the night of the nomination right run down the schedule for us tonight what happened well as we speak it's going on right and um the the big thing tonight will be cuomo's speech because he is fabulous he is so elegant he'd be wonderful a real asset to the party tremendous asset to the country a great man and uh then we'll go through a roll call of the states and everyone will vote and that'll be fun for me to get to do i'm looking forward to that that's when you're calling everybody and asking for the votes and so forth yeah okay yeah don't let him get away with anything if you want to come on over and uh do it with me tonight yeah i can't [Applause] illinois all right iowa uh no i i think things are in good hands with you uh come back anytime i'd love to good luck pleasure meeting [Applause] [Music] you

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Length: 23min 12sec (1392 seconds)

Published: Sat Sep 26 2020