Life Detox Webinar | Session 1: Anxiety

good evening ccf family welcome to our welcome wednesdays webinar for the series life detox and tonight we are focusing on anxiety i am paul de vera and i'm so excited to serve the lord with my lovely wife here claire hello everyone it is indeed a joy to be serving with you guys tonight and now let me give you an intro on what this webinar is all about we have a new series called live detox overcoming toxic realities our new series will discuss how living in a time of pandemic have uncovered toxic behaviors within the family and if remained undealt with will create damage or dysfunctional family relationships that's right so we really aim to shed some light on our current realities and of course encourage families to assess their situations and work towards uh solutions that are based on the bible and as i follow through to our sunday messages we will be having webinar series in welcome wednesdays in hopes to create deeper conversations about our weekly topics and yes praise god indeed for this very relevant topic i know for sure this will speak to a lot of us straight to our hearts right babe yes that is right and so we want to get to know you guys those of you who are with us in zoom right now there's 960 917 and we want to get to know more about you and for those of you in facebook and in youtube we also see you but for some reason you cannot participate in the zoom po for this demographics and so we will do it with zoom we want to know first your nationality how many of you are filipinos and how many of you are from other countries right so you just click on that we we cannot vote as panelists and as hosts so we really want to know if are you from the philippines or are you from other parts of the world and of course we also want to know your gender male or female okay that's specific and we want to know your age but the age we don't measure the numbers okay as you can see the age is being measured on your life stage are you high school student are you a college student are you single are you married and then and of course we also want to know how many are watching with you or are you alone tonight are you with someone else or are we are you with your friends and family members and of course we want to let we want you to let us know is this your first time to attend a ccf event all right so if you can answer those things you can click uh the survey the polls that are launched on your screen if you are using zoom and we will see the results in a bit and thank you for participating right now we have 916 people watching us over facebook and 942 on youtube we welcome you guys tonight thank you thank you for joining us okay and now for the announcement in case you have friends or family members who wants to join us tonight we have an overflow platform you can join us through ccf's youtube page so that's youtube.com ccf main tv and we will also be having a q a question and answer portion later with our panelists so please please please prepare your questions if you're part of the zoom uh webinar that we are having you can send your questions at the q a button below yes we're excited to hear your questions and learn from them also now babe why don't you start with the word of prayer sure let's put ourselves in the most holy presence of god and let's pray father in heaven we glorify you and we praise you lord in the midst of this storm in the midst of the rain in the midst of the pandemic and in the midst of all the problems that we encounter today yesterday and even tomorrow lord we are still sure that you are still god and you are in control we worship you in this place oh god and we pray for tonight's webinar lord clear our hearts and our minds and allow us to be ready to listen to you as we hear experiences and lessons from our guests and our panelists for tonight lord we pray for all the participants that they will be focused and that they will be great minors of truth help us all o lord to truly make the most out of this webinar we glorify you in this time in this place in jesus name we pray and all god's people say amen and amen wow thank you baby for that very powerful prayer now before we start we would like to have an icebreaker first okay this will be fast we want to know very quick we just want to know since we're discussing anxiety right what causes you to be anxious now you can type your answers on our chat box okay and while we're at it as they keep it coming babe i want to know what makes you feel actually oh i have small anxious moments like in the morning when i'm done with my time and i and i have to wake you up babe i like pray to the lord and ask god please allow my wife to wake up on the right side of the bed what but that's a minor thing it's an adventure i will enjoy every day for the rest of my life oh but i love waking up and seeing you really of course but what about you babe what caused you to feel anxious i want to make you blush also so on our first date and during our wedding day i was really so anxious and praise god we're both here yes he rejoice and we can we can serve but look at this yeah why don't we hear from them okay so we we see here death rate during due to covey that's angelina johnson rika kabahit said health and finances this is nice francis it's about the mother getting old you see the familial love of of our watchers for tonight they really are concerned about the things that are happening in their family yeah and i can see no there are various reasons why one feels really anxious and this night is getting more and more exciting so let us not delay let us introduce our panelists for tonight introducing your panelists for tonight starting from us you know we got married just this year in january 2021 in the midst of the pandemic around 2007 our paths crossed at ccf saint francis square however god did not allow us to get to know each other deeper because we were so young then okay but many years after we met once again at ccf center went on a romantic pursuit got through bad news because of my suicide and depression and we work towards restoration and bringing this relationship to god today you know she's my wife now and i work as the special assistant to the senior pastor pastor peter tanchi and my wife is now i work as a sales manager in shopping philippines so tomorrow is nine nine guys we know what to do and of course together we disciple single and married ladies and gentlemen and we also need a go viral group consisting of ut graduates who are professionals in their own fields of expertise and you know we both desire to really serve and honor the lord in our marriage and enjoy the oneness as god brings us through the journey oh what a love story right what a love story but also also to to to level the playing field we have a guest from elevate eunice is a freshman in usd studying architecture she is an active volunteer and a student leader in district five of elevate maine focusing on high school campuses around the ortigas area during her spare time look at this she watches different tv shows and i'd like to clarify if those are tv shows or those are netflix shows but she draws as someone aspiring to be an architect and she serves the lord in any way she can you niece good evening hello hi eunice hi good evening how are you doing today are you feeling anxious excited i think a better word for it would be exciting all right we'll look forward to that then and joining us babe of course um joining us we also have a very special guest from our big singles ministry paolo works as a senior business development manager for a startup bpo company he is also an entrepreneur and an influencer marketing consultant he is currently serving as a facilitator cluster lead in big fridays welcome pal welcome how are you pal i heard that the rings were strong in your area but um there was flood outside outside our house earlier so and we had no power but praise god um he restarted everything and i'm here with you guys so thank you facebook god you're here we're excited to spend time with you and of course we also have a couple who is very dear to our hearts and let's start off with the the male counterpart no he is the founder and the senior pastor of christ's commission fellowship what began as a home bible study in 1983 with few unchurched couples has now grown to over 40 000 members and more and counting with satellites throughout the philippines and the world he finished masters degree in management at the asian institute of management and a doctorate degree in ministry at the igsl recently recognized as a u.p college of business administration's distinguished alumni with a upaa distinguished award in entrepreneurship and employment creation he co-authored with his wife whom we will also introduce in a bit a book on successful parenting called motivate from biblical principles applied in raising their five children from whom they have 21 grandchildren he's my boss my mentor dr pastor peter tanchi hi pastor peter and i am also very excited to of course introduce the amazing beautiful woman next to him she is a graduate of the university of south florida with a degree in interdisciplinary studies formerly she toured southeast asia with a crossroads a singing group of campus crusade for christ and gave concerts to over 200 000 in nine countries she was instrumental in helping to set up the master's academy homeschool which was the first deaf ed accredited homeschool program here in the philippines she is also a conference speaker counselor for women and families and a very very good bible teacher ladies and gentlemen let us all welcome mrs deona tanchi all right tonight we will start the ball rolling we will now be having our q a and so we have interesting questions for our panelists tonight and we want to start off with pastor peter and miss leona the question is this why are you so passionate about toxic realities and in this new series that we have life detox how does it impact families really toxic emotions toxic attitudes not only affect our personal lives but it affects the family members the loved ones around you and many times we don't realize the damage it can cause the loved ones around us the reason why i am very passionate about this topic is i've not really heard a lot about spiritual maturity and emotional maturity linked together but that's reality spiritual maturity is not just head knowledge spiritual maturity is really how do you manage emotions especially when you are disappointed so the test for the spiritual the test for the spirituality of a man or a woman the test for his or her maturity has to do with emotions therefore if emotions are not handled properly it will impact the family it will be a bad example and a bad testimony to your office mates so this is very very crucial because emotions reveals the heart and very few people will focus or teach us the importance of self-control especially in the area of emotions exactly miss leona do you want to add something to that oh yeah i'll explain what peter said uh research shows that emotions are caught so an angry parent raises angry children an anxious parent raises anxious children i was with a friend many many years ago when i was still single uh and with my parents and she was in my hou i was in her house uh helping to watch her and uh when there was a lightning storm she ran under the bed and she was screaming and i said what's wrong what's wrong why are you so afraid she says my mother is so afraid of thunder and lightning and so i'm so afraid so we don't realize that there's lasting impacts by toxic emotions that's why we need to detox well that's good uh i like the point that she raised a while a while ago just just that just on that point that uh sometimes you know these emotions these attitudes can be hereditary in a sense that they copy what they experience or what they see from their parents that's right and thank you pastor peter and mr yonah for sharing why it is really important for us to go through this series now i'd like to hear from the singles you niece and bow how did you cope with anxiety during this pandemic what specific issue surfaced and what helped you overcome these let's start off with i think let's start off is it ladies first or ladies ladies first so let's start eunice representing elevate how about how did you cope up with anxiety during this pandemic um there are a lot of things for me that happened this pandemic but i think the primary issue that really affected me was the issue within my family because uh my parents um they were having issues and at this time as well i was also transitioning from senior high school to college so um it was it weighed a lot um on my mind at the time and there was a lot to think about especially that sometimes when i would hear my parents fight um honestly the first thing i could really think of doing was just praying like i remember initially the first few months of um hearing the fights uh yeah the first thing i would do i would either get up and start praying and i remember also that sometimes before the fights would start my sisters would come into my room and i'd encourage them to pray with me and we'd pray together as siblings and i'm thrilled i think the whole experience honestly it was just really humbling because a lot of the time i felt the need to be a mediator i felt the need to have to hear out everybody and i felt the need to be a student as well and to do well in in class and admittedly there were so many times i felt so overwhelmed and so alone with my issue but it was at this time also that i was reminded that these titles kind of meant nothing in a sense that they didn't matter the only title for me that mattered or at least god helped me realize that mattered was that i was his child and that this wasn't something i had to carry on my own and that even though there are so many assumptions i can make to where the problems would be going even for this whole pandemic where where the whole chaos would be would lead up to it doesn't matter because god is in control of of my time of my life and that whatever happens you know the verse that says you know god makes things beautiful in his own time and even my life verse being proverbs 5 6 saying trust in the lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your path straight that was one of the things that was the verse i really clutched close to my heart where really acknowledging that my perspective is limited but i see what i seek what i think could happen in the future is limited and that whatever happens at least i have god as my portion and that man i will make it beautifulness on time any story so amen thank you eunice i think that's nice that we heard that uh you know her perspectives really had to change and so when you're going through something and you're anxious just like how eunice did it and she she she really brought the word of god right and it was out there in the open how about you pao as a single man as a single man you know dealing with all these working issues uh um employment issues and the pandemic and the transfer and the transfer right from but how did you overcome these things pal what are these things and how did you overcome yeah well um one of the things that really transpired during the pandemic is my was my abrupt shift of not only career but also industry um for conte and lifestyle at the same time for context i've been living independently in manila uh ever since i was in college in ateneo so far from my family here in batangas so i've been used to the you know independent lifestyle doing things on my own not having to really you know take care of people or like mind other people like my family and everything but then um fast forward during this pandemic in my job um i was told that they were having some troubles because you know they don't have um funds are depleting uh the overhead cost is getting high and they they couldn't sustain so i knew it was coming that i'd be um you know i had have to let go of it and uh so i i really prayed to the lord i was really anxious because um a lot of my friends know that um years back i had a big death problem and i was just recovering um from it by god's grace it was it was a story for a different time but it's when the lord really worked on me and so i was kind of anxious again how will i rebuild my life uh with you know with a new career but you know god is faithful as i always pray um i always start my prayer with thank you for being sovereign and in control and that's what he he proved to me and he actually just like in jeremiah chapter 17 verses 78 but blessed is the one who trusts in the lord whose confidence is in him they will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out in roots by the stream it does not fear when the heat comes its leaves as always greed it has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit there was a time i you know i didn't get my salary right away but god is good that during the time that i felt that i need to make that move he actually blessed me with a new job through a friend work from home uh with a better pay by god's grace and he most more importantly he blessed me he gave me peace of mind and the heart to actually just let go of everything and just move back to my hometown in batangas and be with my family uh looking back i always tell people that that's re that really isn't me it's really by god's grace and enabling alone because um i was really i was kind of attached to the kind of independent life but then the lord really made me easy to really transition so um yeah he just proves that he'll you know he'll take care of me and up to now um i i can really see the purpose why i'm here uh in batangas with my family and um being uh being uh more closer to them and allowing myself to to build my relationship with them which you know which has been lost in in the past few years so that's it yeah thank you thank you pao thank you for sharing that and i believe that a lot of us right can really relate to his story because a lot of people lost their jobs during this pandemic um okay now we have an anonymous question this is a top voted question right now in our q a box and we want to ask that to pastor peter tanchi and the question is this do you believe that god can also use psychologists psychiatrists other mental health specialists and medications for that matter to help people manage their symptoms relating to mental conditions why why not and to what extent definitely god can use doctors psychiatrists psychologists all of those scientific discoveries whatever it is is not against the bible just realize to treat mental anxiety etc many times medicine or psychiatrist can help us but always remember are they solving the root problem the concern i have with medication is it is palliative it does not really solve the problem i do not like people to become dependent on medicines for the rest of their lives so praise god he uses medicine he uses doctor he uses people but as i have said in my previous talk 90 or problems a result spiritually thank you thank you pastor peter for that i think people really expect a clear answer and we thank pastor peter for being honest enough to say uh these things i mean i also had to consult a psychiatrist you know when i went through what i what i've gone through but ultimately ultimately it's an issue of the heart and you know who's the expert on hearts that's the lord right uh and so we want to we now want to ask a question to miss deona miss deona the question is this did you struggle with um personal personal anxieties during this pandemic why or why not um personal uh personal anxieties not related to them pandemic because i really know that the days of my life are in god's hands and he knows that he knows the days of our lives and so covet can't kill me cancer can't kill me only when my my time is up then god will bring me home but um i guess that there are daily there are anxieties that can come in a day or things that need to be done over people that you're concerned about so yes i've had those during the pandemic but the one verse that really really comforted me during when i would have those concerns was the verse that my god will accomplish what concerns me it's really ultimately god who's going to take care of the problems he is the problem-bearer and the problem-solver he says you know cast your cares to the lord because he cares for you so i've really learned to when i when i feel this then i begin to talk to myself why am i feeling anxious why am i feeling a little bit down and then i will analyze it and then i'm going to give it to god and i'm going to claim this promise to take care of it it's not uh what what oh it's no peter's not my problem no he's my blessing sometimes no as i'm some type he's amazing and i just have to say the man you see preaching is the man that i live with so he's he's consistent and i praise god but i i think ultimately everybody is being filled and controlled by the holy spirit because we look for joy we look for peace but the bible told us the formula says walk by the spirit be filled with the spirit and the fruit of the spirit is love joy peace patience so whenever i get skewed in my emotions then i say oh yes i'm in control so lord holy spirit take control of me then he helps me process so basically i live i live hassle i'm not anxious by god's grace paul can i add something sure pastor peter yeah i always pray that our stress will not come from her or from me i always tell pastors stress we will surely have but if it is stress caused by other people by circumstances that's one thing that's part of our ministry just make sure you don't have family stress caused by your husband or your wife because those are real problems those are real stress and that's why this pandemic will reveal any family any relationships that is having problem and you don't run away from this you learn to resolve it so toxic emotions is a reminder you need help and don't run away and i praise god my wife does not cause me any stress hey can i say something paul on a practical side um you know when you have anxiety or stress you have cortisol high cortisol you have uh um adrenaline and one of the ways that i deal with it we deal with it also to keep healthy is we exercise every day exercise is a really good way to deal with anxiety and stress because you're getting all of those toxic chemicals you know they're being used up by that so that helps and then um medication is what peter was saying i think it's good for it could be for intervention but if you stay on it then you're then you're become dependent and actually there's a lot of ways to naturally manage these things and uh i know that i'm not well one thing that's very good is fish oil fish oil is a mood regulator it helps a lot so thank you for that now babe you know what to get me i need that fish oil okay i will hunt for her there's only one fish in the city okay i will make sure we'll get that um but we want to ask eunice and paulo now okay after hearing some wisdom from pastor peter and miss miss diona uh the question is this how did your response to anxiety affected affected your family so for example if you had anxieties during those times i think i i'd asked this first to paolo about because paul struggled with uh with a shift with the move and all these things but eventually seeing you pau uh how you handled this how you you know brought all these things how did your family react to it and i think am i right in in saying that you're the first christian in the family yes yes i am by god's grace my parents are separated uh by god's grace my my dad's side i was able to uh bring them to ccf years like two three years ago um we've been when we're together we've been attending a family service my mom before she was not so um okay but uh eventually um she saw the change in me and with regard to dealing with anxiety um i think the most surprising thing for them was when it as i mentioned it was very easy for me to just um call them and say mom and dad although they're not here in batangas i told them that i'm going home to batangas i'm going to be terminating my contract with my in the condominium and i'll go back and just be there during this pandemic um and they they know how much i wanted to to stay in manila but you know seeing that shift and um seeing that you know i was still positive and regardless of what's happening with my uncertainties with my career um it was it was kind of refreshing for them and i think and that also gave me opportunity to share my perspective um how the lord has been comforting me during these times so that's been very very helpful and i'm i'm still praying for for you know my family to get to know jesus more i'm sure i'm sure paul all eyes are on you and god has brought you there like what what uh what the bible says about esther you are brought there as such a time as this so me your life so shine brother but what about you eunice how did your um how did your family uh you know react to to how you responded to your anxiety to your own issues in life um in terms of i think my response um aside from being anxious i think part of me is really hurt by what was happening between my parents and with the whole situation and you know asking questions to god like why now like why in quarantine when i'm transitioning i was there i was in such an overwhelming space but i think what really helped me was having the perspective nah because my understanding is that my well of love or how much i can love a person is so shallow there's so only so much i can give so rather than drawing from that well i should start drawing from christ's love and that was something i started really praying about like to love my parents and to look past my own heart with christ's love and not my own self um something i think that i was able to do in the quarantine because when it started happening one of my goals was something i found really helpful for me was to have a degree because that support group really actually like carried me through a lot of the rough days aside from having accountability partners also so my goal was to in the quarantine to find the groups for my sisters because aside from praying together i know that there are some things that they didn't want to share with me and i was i was alright with that so um yeah that was my goal and praise god they both have the group with uh the groups now and they're good and yeah of course we still talk um i try my best especially with the middle child because we'll sometimes sleep in the same room together we talk about god especially and her family and like her learnings especially about jesus and respect this and throughout the pandemic so yeah i think with my parents on the other hand i think we got a couple of times we got really talked talk about where they are i think also in their spiritual lives and overall how they've been doing house their heart and it's a slow process in a process i'm really praying and surrendering to god because like i said earlier it's really out of my hands all right all i'm doing is obeying the love people love them as people jesus so yeah thank god for that thank you for sharing your needs you know i was really so blessed because this pandemic um same with you know on reaching out your siblings this was also the time when i was able to do more bible studies with my siblings and teach them how to do their quiet time right so we have a follow-up question to pastor peter and miss deona how do you cope with anxiety caused by family because we also saw that in the chat the reason for their anxiety are their family members and they're struggling with it and they don't have a choice because they're living with the same people that are causing them anxiety is where i call you to recalibrate your mind because the reality is this is what i call committed relationships you cannot run away from committed relationships so committed relationships must be viewed as god's instrument to help you grow in the area of love to grow in the area of christ-likeness because you cannot run away from family relationships therefore the idea should be you cannot really change them but you can control your response and then by your example you are going to trust god to change them but don't try to fix family because i've discovered in my life i cannot fix people i can only love people pray for them but to fix people i have surrendered them to the lord if i try to fix people i will go crazy i'll become depressed and i'll be so anxious because i have discovered i am not god only god is god miss dionne do you want to add to that well um i don't know what is the cause of the stress uh what is the relationship um chemistry i think uh one a good perspective is what peter's saying that god causes all things to work together for good but if you feel even even family members that are difficult because it conforms you to the image of christ you learn patience you learn forgiveness and love but if you're living with these people and uh you know it's pretty toxic well maybe what you can do is you can try to change the environment uh first you pray and you give them to god but then try to change the environment of the home by becoming an encourager and a firmer think of look at the person and think of how you can encourage them today what positive thing can you say because it can begin to change the chemistry of the family but most of all you have to also have a positive mean put in your mind that maybe they're trying to help maybe it's a wrong style but have the idea that maybe they do mean well but just don't appreciate their style so you can affirm their meaning well and um and then you can ask them okay what how can i improve maybe they are frustrated with you so maybe you should just ask well you know they're the problem but you know when you go to the root maybe you have some problems so you can ask them how can i improve mom brother sister whoever's there and listen and then say thank you very much i appreciate it i'll try to change so that might help you yeah i appreciate that miss dionne especially asking them how do we improve and remember you have a heart you should have a heart that is filled with the presence of the holy spirit because once you once you ask you know and the next thing you need to do you get the feedback you cannot respond negatively okay so you listen and according to mr owner the advice is thank you for that i will i will work on that not all with all humility goodbye and let's let christ's light shine so thank you so much miss dionne for that now i want to hear from my wife as well why what makes you anxious and how did you overcome them okay you know i asked my question i i asked myself this question last sunday and since pastor peter actually taught us the four r's right i realized at one point in this pandemic this somewhat really hardened my heart in a way babe if i may be honest i really fear death not mine okay but the death of someone dear to me and we hear so much news even from our downlines right that a lot of people are getting ill and then as the cases rise you know death gets closer to home and we've lost friends and loved ones and sometimes it's really hopeless it's because it's really painful right and the fear of uncertainties when when will this pandemic and are my loved ones say for even you when you go out it makes me anxious like are you gonna get kobe's right and so i let you take a shower as soon as you get home but um these things it's really paralyzing and the way god dealt with my heart was when he reminded me the cure and that cure is to really focus on who he is to fix our eyes on him and that moment i really had to snap out of my fear because i was letting satan you know control the way i view god right and as the circumstances are not getting better if i were to stay at that state my god will start shrinking and that's really that's really dangerous and of course as pastor peter mentioned we had to i had to recalibrate and um i had to remind myself that there were many many things that we should be grateful for remember babe um during dinner one time we were talking we just asked ourselves what are you grateful for and we both responded that we are grateful because our rice our cannon and our soup is warm right so that's already something to be grateful for and from then on whenever we hear people you know getting sick instead of you know going through assumptions in your mind right we start to do our part and what is that we have to pray we ask um our friends our family members how can we be of help right and we also have to trust god that he is in control how about you babe what makes you anxious and what did you do to overcome them well you know getting married in a time of pandemic was really my greatest moment of anxiety and this was caused by many factors i know i don't have much you know and i was planning for a grand wedding but i know i couldn't afford such a wedding and they remember when we used to fight on the phone early on because it's obvious that i won't reach my target amount for the wedding and we were our wedding was perfect but our wedding was perfect and that's that's that's really the lord's miracle i really cried and cried and cried to the lord for miracles and miracles came and he was faithful to provide he was touching people who have now become so dear to us as we are faithful also in making sure we don't miss out on giving back to god you know sometimes when you're in need you're asking god to provide and you forget that you also have to to give back right because everything belongs to that and then there was the wedding day the wedding date was set on a date where that week no quarantine issues like after our wedding the 14 levels came back you know it was really a god-ordained day and i was so anxious then uh but i was afraid that our wedding would be a coveted spreader but praise god it nobody had covered nobody complained nobody complained from the wedding but here's the thing my wife and i got covered at two months after i think two months after the wedding and clueless we were so clueless to how to take care of ourselves because the doctor said you know you can just isolate here at your house because you're just two in the house so just stay here and so we don't really know how to take care of ourselves and we were doing oxymeter and that oximeter reading remember that yeah we had 91. and i i rejoiced because i said babe it's like it's like a great that i would rejoice why am i having difficulty breathing maybe because of the window let's open the window but you know god really took care of us as i was getting anxious god was still faithful and so i remember that hymn here i raise my ebeneezer either by thy help i come i draw near to god i have mentors who taught me to trust the lord and to not worry about the things that are not within my control and believe that he empowers me and he gives me strength he provides he gives peace even in a time of pandemic and so we are here today only by the grace of god but we want to ask a a a question to pastor peter because this question came from facebook pastor peter the question is this does one really commit sin when he or she is worried or he or she is anxious is it already automatically a sin you know i praise god god is very kind and patient with us but definitely when god issues a command and you don't follow how do you call that disobedience when you when god issues a clear command do not be anxious and then you become anxious and that's what i call respectable sin and i think god's desire is for our protection so when you begin to look at the word of god and you begin to realize all of god's prohibition all of god's command it's meant to protect us you are not doing god a favor when you obey him you are doing yourself a favor so once you understand this and you realize jesus died on the cross and paid for all our sins then your approach towards god is no longer legalistic the reason why i'm not worried if i'm worried is simply because god loves me and i turn over i worry to him i don't start counting how many scenes have i committed today i am warring again that is not a relationship god wants but god wants you to know every time you disobey him that is wrong so that's how you grow in the christian life you don't consider obeying god because of fear you obey god because he loves you and you know if you don't obey him you are doing yourself damage and of course you dishonor him thank you thank you pastor peter now we want to throw a question to pau because pao is of from the working working team represent okay so pao the question is this uh this one is asked from our youtube so youtube peeps we also see you whatever you're putting there and so someone asked how do you overcome anxiety at work working with toxic co-workers for example how do you build effective working relationships when your office mates are the ones who are causing you to feel anxious to have anxiety um what's your experience about that and can you give us an advice i want to hear this bow [Laughter] um well uh i think we can all relate to that um if you're working in corporate but um first and foremost we have to remind ourselves at the end of the day god is our ultimate boss we are in the workplace to serve him and him alone and um so if we have that perspective in mind we we won't you know it's really um less for us to to really mind um what's going on in the environment to do it's easier for us to focus on what we need to do um i always tell people at the end of the day especially if for example you are working with if if your office mates for example know that you are a christian um you are not representing yourself alone um i always remind myself whatever i do in the office i don't just represent paolo i represent jesus because they know i'm a christian so um if i continue to remind myself that i'd be more careful in how i deal with people i'll be more careful in how i react or respond to a stress and different situations because stress will always be there i mean problems will arise but whenever i get to to to think and um keep to heart that i am not just representing myself it makes me more grounded and careful with with how i relate to to my office mates because what i do um it speaks of my belief and also god put me there for a reason and that is to be salt and light um in the workplace so um that kind of you know uh outlines the direct give me the gives me the right perspective as i work uh in in the workplace amen thank you thank you for that reminder paul um we are really called to be assault in life even in the workplace right and to win people to christ with our attitude and our character so eunice um we want to hear from you can you share any other practical tips as a student to get to the root of our anxiety after all our heart can also be deceitful as the bible says yes so for the students you niece what can you advise i think what really helped me to get to the root with the anxiety then i guess really accountability and talking to my degree um also a verse that i particularly like is in um i think psalms 36 10 the they still know that i am god um a lot of times especially when i because it's not only in my family i'm actually from also anxious for college and all the work i have to do sometimes and a lot of times sometimes immediately when i hear um about oh this prof uh gave us work at 12 in the uh 12 a.m for some reason or something it's so easy for me to go oh my goodness what do i do do i distract myself or do i just want to rest do i turn off my laptop or maybe i'll talk to somebody but no like one of the first things i tried to do to lega is to be still and uh talk to god about it and i guess really remind myself of who god is in my life and what he's doing like his character that he's in control um that it's really him who's gonna give me the ability to be excellent in my work uh and that in him i can find my rest inspiration and yeah drive to go forward till i go so i think that's one practical thing it's really to go to god first about it okay sure you remind us of who god is and of course accountability i cannot stress how much accountability and develop really like helped me like talking especially to my group leader about you know when issues arise at home it helps to have that perspective have someone else's perspective come in and really call you out especially when they think that what you're doing in certain situations is not correct and i think it's really up to you also to like be humble and accept that criticism and accept um that help in a sense if you really want to improve because there were times really where my struggle with anxiety and issues at home were really bad and it was so easy for me to want to just be angry to just want them like i'm not gonna remind this person anymore like and just like say i guess just avoid people in general but really we're called god calls us to love people and even god calls us to love difficult people i remember pastor peter had one of those to serve once before so it's really rising up to the challenge with the help of god of course and your group and the people around you because no man is an island we're not really we're not meant to walk in this world alone we're meant to support and encourage one another so yeah amen i think that's a wonderful uh issue to raise you know we really need to grow in a fellowship and for those of you listening to us and you're not familiar about the groups the groups are small groups these are um you know believers who join together they share lives together they learn the bible together and they journey from life together and that's wonderful and wonderful experience to have people backing you up you know and you also being able to help out others now i want to ask pastor peter our second most voted question pastor peter this is the statement okay let me read the statement my anxiety is mostly caused by the group because of the many issues probably in small group they were opening up and they were hearing all these baggages being a d group leader is not easy while it requires full-hearted commitment it is also an emotionally exhausting journey my question is if a d group leader becomes emotionally mentally and spiritually exhausted until you eventually become a toxic person toward them and to your families what should we do what are the practical steps if uh you would counsel us to take a break for example do you counsel us to just drop off the d group what do we do pastor peter miss dionna we want to hear it's a very relevant topic and question so here are the different angles personally if you yourself is the one that you feel you are exhausted you are tired and you are beginning to be toxic my advice is you examine your own heart ask yourself why are you stressed so that's personally for me if you can learn to process what's causing the stress many times it is when you try to change people many times when you want to play the holy spirit in solving people's problem do you realize for many people they just want to unburden their problems they just want a leader to share with them to listen to them and of course because you love them you are also pressured to do something but just realize now control what you can control surrender to god what you cannot control and that will help you become less stressed however on the other side if you want to take a break there is absolutely nothing wrong you share that with your d group leader and tell the people around you can i take a few weeks off now the reason why i think you should be careful in planning your break announcing your break is you want to be a good example you don't want people to see every time there's a problem then you escape you don't want that modeling at the same time you also want to mold their honesty so there is no hard and fast rule when should i take a break there are times in most organizations where they force people to take a sabbatical for example after so many years you want to take a sabbatical leave every year if you want to take a one month lead to me it's absolutely okay i allow our pastors to take family breaks i allow them we are not legalistic so i hope that answers the question of taking the willingness to take breaks just plan it properly with your d group leaders or area pastors mr owner are you gonna add um i think that you know when we work with people um of course that it's it gets messy at times and i remember before that i would also get a little stressed trying to help people see things from god's perspective maybe changing some character traits and god told me diana you're stressed because that's not your job it's my job and he reminded me that your job is to love them to model to them what christ's likeness is model proper responses but i love paul's perspective call the apostle um oh then god told me use my word you don't tell them what to do you just give them a verse it relates to their problem or circumstance let them read it and then say what is god telling you to do in relation to this verse and of course pray for them i mean really we we get stressed when we stop praying because when we work we work and we get stressed when we pray god works but i want to give you a perspective that i practice when i look at people i remember all kinds of people even at myself when i feel like i'm being difficult i remember this verse philippians 1 6. paul dealing with all these difficult people he said this i am confident so when you look at yourself your husband your children or whoever is causing you stress i or whoever you're getting stressed over i am confident paul said that he god who began a good work in you will complete it so god began the good work and so we have to be confident that god's going to complete it we're not going to complete it even the work on us he will complete so then we can entrust them to god and then we can enjoy them and love them by the power of the spirit can i add one more sure pastor same time many times if you learn to talk to your heart talk to yourself i want to share this with all the group leaders if you have wrong motives it will cause stress what do i mean if you want to impress people check your motives but your motive is to love to help people and not try to fix people not try to take credit not try to prove to the world how good you are my friend you can learn to relax and be rested in serving god that to me is a sign of spiritual maturity when you can serve god in a rested manner not trying to prove anything to anybody so my encouragement be rested pray for people and then one more suggestion i divide our d group d12 into teams you know sometimes we divide them so that they can help each other many times we think of ministry as a lone ranger as if everything is dependent upon you i praise god in sisia we have many pastors we have many degree leaders we have so many because i made sure i don't carry the burden myself if you carry the burden yourself you will surely burn up god always operates in terms of a team jesus had esteemed peter james and john and then he had the twelve in fact one of his team members judas i hope you don't have a judas because jesus will really cost you stress however you learn to love learn to pray for them and then release them ministry can be a joy but let me warn you ministry is messy because people are messy amen agreeing to that statement and uh thank you pastor peter for the wisdom now there's a there's an itching question being asked by the singles in the house and so the representative of singles is pow so paul your answer here will really matter to the lives of the countless singles who are watching us tonight the question is going to be given by my wife paul first question are you single yes yes welcome to okay i was gonna say big fridays but anyway here's the question how do you overcome the anxiety of being single forever because it's pandemic and it's difficult to meet new people right any tips or any advices you can give to our singles um i knew that was the question coming something like that anyway um for context for context also and i think a lot of people can can can relate to this um i'm getting i've been you know for the past like one two years i've been getting a lot of like comments from relatives every time they see me they always ask me when are you getting married do you have a girlfriend what are your plans etc and it's it's kind of you know um it gives me a lot it's been giving me a lot of pressure but then you know as i as i um journey with the lord um i realized at the end of the day uh being single or married it's it's really up to him um first and foremost because he controls my life and i have to um you know submit to what he wants however um i also know that um at the end of the day we can always pray pray about it and um that's so what i did i started um praying uh i didn't pray for anyone specific i just uh started praying uh lord um i'm i'm satisfied with you whatever you want to to do with my life but um if you want me to uh meet a suitable partner then i pray that you get to prepare me to be the best for my god's best and i just started praying for uh praying about it and i really didn't know because it's pandemic and um but you know uh god is always already in control despite if it's pandemic or whatever um if he really wants you and your um it's the it is in his perfect time to get your partner or meet someone you will um it will happen because he wills it so um don't don't worry about it don't do much just focus on your relationship with him because at the end of the day we're all praying for our god's best but are we the best for our god's best already i mean are we allowing the lord to transform us prepare us for because marriage is a totally different you know for lack of amen from friends like you who are already married so so i might pray my prayer is really for the lord to just you know continue to prepare me for that i love that thank you for sharing with us that you know if it's really god's will for you to be with someone right no pandemic can stop your love story if it is according to the lord's will yeah as well that's right that's right um and yeah god's best is god himself so first make sure you're satisfied with the lord and then everything else will come up as a bonus now we want to ask a question to you miss eunice is joining us now in this uh panel eunice as you are representing the youth somebody sent this and this is the message i wonder if god still cares about me since anxiety really hit me hard this summer for all the burdens put on me school finances taking care of my mom grieving my dad i feel like i've lost the battle i've lost my future as well i'm sorry for the feelings of resentment i just feel really really really angry i'm sure eunice can relate if you are talking to this person what would you advise him or her wow honestly the question kind of hits home because there were many times where i felt that you know that uh i was let go god and there were many times where it felt so isolating the issue felt at home thought so isolating and yeah i didn't i felt alone and there wasn't much i could do i was just at one point i think i also fell into numbness where i was just trying to avoid thinking about these things because really all it brought for me was like stress but there was a verse in a recently in isaiah um for this year i think where god says that through the fire and through deep water that he will go with you it was in this chapter in isaiah 43 where he really makes it a point to claim the israelites as his people and even in this chapter i think in the nlp version it's he specifically says for i love you because he says i love you and i think throughout the whole pandemic and throughout these periods of like down and struggle there were many times whenever i came back it was always i remember it was always whenever i came back to god god always accepted me with so much love and so much there was sometimes anger in me also because sometimes we go to god with the same sins it feels like we go to god with the same sins like god i'm angry again at these people like lord i'm struggling again sin and i'm sorry and we feel it sometimes feels sorry done but and then in a sense sometimes it feels we can feel weak but i'm but then i'm reminded that it is in our weakness god is made strong that it is our exactly our dependence on god that you know is where we draw our strength and yeah i get sometimes the world will really try to beat you down especially when you're a child of god i mean that's the goal right this is full of the enemy it's to really separate us from god it's to make us let go of god but really if you you really need to answer yourself in god i know like some days it's gonna feel like you don't hear god you don't see him moving or anything but even in this read the bible his promises he always makes good on his promises and even in your own life looking at because i think what really helped me also was looking back at my own life in the moments of my own struggle in the moments like even before this pandemic it's looking back and seeing god and where he where he worked and it's asking myself also like is it me asking so is god real or not looking at all of that you've experienced in life can you deny this can you deny god didn't do this dream can you deny god doesn't love you because he's going he goes through these limits he goes to this uh he goes through above and just to answer you and it's it's also for it's also remembering that god isn't required to do any of this he was never even required to die on the cross he chose to die on the cross because that's just how much he loves you and i know it's hard to see sometimes really that's the importance i think what helped me to look at memories memorizing versus reciting verses and just talking to god yeah and i guess that's the the the note that you said no you niece that remembering that god sent his son and his son you know jesus christ paid for the sins of the world that is to an extent it really blows your mind the the love is really amazing and i'm sure with all the things that you said you nice you are a bright light tonight and i'm sure you're representing elevate so well i'm sure you've helped this person and i hope this person who asked this will continue to listen to the voice of truth now we want to ask our senior pastor and his wife how can parents protect but not be overprotective of their children from the worries and concerns of this world please give us practical tips on how parents of young children and youth can do this especially in this pandemic it is important that you categorize what areas are major what are minor the problem with many parents everything is major and if you overprotect your children will react against you and it's not good overprotection is also bad because you must allow your children sometimes to experience hardship to experience problems because it is part of the process of growing however there are certain things that you have to make sure it is still protected example when it comes to life and death issue that to me is very important when my children who are young i will probably not allow them to play in the street alone because that can be dangerous so you need to determine with your own family members for their major what are minor if possible don't sweat over the minor stuff because if it does not cause death just minor problems it's okay you know why because pain disappointment hardship is part of growth what do you think well i think when it comes to protection they don't need to see you as fearful because if you're fearful it makes them afraid i think that they need to know for our children for example um after what happened to joy our daughter carolyn got really afraid she was very fearful and she said you know mom dad god allowed it to happen before he might allow it to happen again and she was locking all the doors and she was really afraid so we taught our principal that i think it's so important we said you know carolyn it's never the absence of problem that's our security it's the presence of the lord and we taught that to our children that god is present wherever you are he's watching over you so um you of course you do your part you be careful uh when it comes to like at night when our kids were uh were in school we didn't we didn't wait up until they came home we just said lord watch over them take care of them and we told them drive safely so we we communicated to our children that we tr entrusted them to god and we also trusted them i think that children need to know that we trust them to make wise decisions don't always micromanage don't always micromanage their decisions and then give them confidence in god and make them accountable to god because ultimately our children have to know who god is they have to know that they will one day stand before him and they're accountable and they should live to please him and that's a big form of protection right away to keep them from foolishness amen amen thank you miss leona thank you pastor peter for those uh answers i think those are very helpful to the parents that are tuning in with their kids tonight yeah okay so we have another question here and i want to address it to you babe so from an anonymous attendee my friend a brother in the faith who has struggled with clinical depression trusts me a lot and opens up to me often about his depression how can i keep being there praying and listening to him i can't relate to his experience and i'm so afraid of saying something wrong that can trigger anxiety and suicidal thoughts what should i do to improve as a friend well uh to that anonymous sender let me answer you by saying since i experienced depression and i needed to talk to people about it you know i needed friends um your friend needs someone who will listen okay and so it doesn't matter if you can solve his problem or not the the thing that matters most is that you are there you are listening and when you're listening you're not just unmute okay you will listen and you will confirm that you are understanding what this person is going through i've also counseled countless depressed guys in in my downline or even outside my downline and i listen to them i listen to their stories and i pray while listening i pray lord show me something lord show me something that i can point out so there will be times when when the lord would really touch my heart as i was listening to the story that maybe this part he hasn't surrendered to god maybe there's a sin or a struggle that's keeping him from enjoying his freedom in christ and so i listen intently to these things and i ask questions questions that will really hit my heart and when it comes out i make sure empowered by the holy spirit i will be there to catch that person because sometimes when a depressed person is talking to you and you see his or her sins obviously coming up like you know what's wrong already when you tell the person you know what's wrong with you you already lost that person so you have to be very careful and you have to show that person that you care i would bring us back to the the age-old activity of ccf pray care and share you pray intentionally you care by showing that you love and understand and you share hope you share faith you share truth to that person never get tired why because you are being empowered by the holy spirit you rely on the holy spirit to do these things and after that when when somebody is you know saved from his suicidal thoughts saved from his depression you don't take the glory to yourself you always remind yourself glory to god because if you take that with you the enemy will know okay i know who to attack next so you always give the glory to god always point them to jesus again fix our eyes on jesus thank you so much for sharing dave and for reminding us the importance of how god has to be involved in every situation and how as leaders or how as a friend right we have to point our friends to god alone yeah thank you thank you and now uh we are closing no so we want to hear from all our panelists we want to see our panelists now everyone paolo uh eunice and of course our senior password and mrs leona who's they're very busy today but they gave time for us we would want to hear from you your parting words any parting thoughts and encouragement on anxiety as short as possible as you can and let's start off with um eunice and then paulo and then uh pastor peter pastor peter and miss dionna eunice you start first oh my goodness um so parting words um for me i think really it's really dependent on god like i think that's the way to go with it you really god tells us to have endurance and persevere in this life because he knows i mean nothing is new under the sun he knows how much struggle we're gonna have seen how much struggle that people are going to go through that's why he commands us to have endurance then during this rate but the beauty of it is that we're not alone we're not alone to endure this race by ourselves we have each other fellow christians we have our families we have our friends most importantly we have god so really it all goes back to him so really it's all about that's why it's really all just about surrendering in terms of my anxiety and it's a daily choice a choice you make every day and a choice where you wake up and decide to give your life your day to him but just trust him and hold on to him as your hope and your anger so yeah amen thank you you heard from our future architect architect eunice and we thank you for your wisdom how about you pau what can you leave with us um thank you for that question anyway i'd like to start off with something from isaiah chapter 41 10. so do not fear for i am with you do not need dismayed for i am your god i will strengthen you and help you i will uphold you with my righteous right hand um i think with everything that's been happening to us first we have to accept that you know stress anxiety uh things not going our way will will happen um it's part of reality but we have to also remind ourselves again i've always been saying this god is always sovereign and in control things happen for a reason what we are going through right now things happen for a reason and to find out that reason i believe we can only do that if you continue to walk with the lord so it's continually seeking him why um you know there must be a reason why i'm feeling this right now there must be a reason why i'm experiencing this right now and no one will tell you the truth except the lord um he you know spending time with him of course being accountable to rd group uh and their d group leaders because god will use them to actually speak to you when you know you feel that you can't hear him so just being open to to god's direction and um being open to to um and allowing him to really um guide through us during especially during this tough times so um that'll you know having that kind of mindset i believe will really um keep us at peace and uh grounded uh despite you know experiencing difficulty thank you actually speaking of connection there are many um viewers tonight who are reaching out to that single dashing guy and they want to connect with you but to connect with you so that they can connect to big singles events so i'm sure you're blushing right now so i have to pray first send your applications okay uh and of course you want to hear from our senior pastor and his wife who will go first is it ladies first pastor peter okay let's hear from miss deona first you know i think that many times when we're going through anxiety and fear and we feel so alone but jesus made a promise to us in matthew 28 he said lo i am with you always even to the end of the age so i think to remember that wherever you are whatever is going on jesus is there even when you're sleeping and if you feel not understood like no one understands he understands you and he gives you an amazing invitation he says cast your cares on him because he cares for you so it's pray care and share you can pray care share with him you pray you cast your burden to him and then you will see that he's really there for you he loves you beautiful thank you mr yonah and pastor peter well my closing reminder is first see the heart of jesus jesus tells us in john 14 let not your heart be troubled believe in god believe also in me that is not a suggestion that is a command let not your heart be troubled in other words it's always easy for us to be troubled and the context has to do with the future because they know that jesus is going to leave them soon so they are troubled and jesus said let not your heart be troubled and what is the solution believe in god believe also in me i like to believe our biggest challenge for believers is do you know what it means to trust in god to trust in jesus because we use that word trust so glibly that many times we go into extreme for some people believe trust means you do nothing and surrender everything to god the other extreme is you do everything but you don't know how to trust god i suggest always remember this principle what does it mean let not your heart be trouble believe in god believe also in me i suggest the meaning of trusting god is assume your responsibility for what you can do in other words if you are worried about money if you are worried about getting married if you are worried about your career you ask yourself what is it within my control that i can do now it sounds simple actually it is not why because many times we go overboard example when my family were younger and i was very busy i make sure i balance my life i do my best i have a secular job i work because at that time my children are not able to work yet so i was supporting the family with my work but the way i balance this is simply this after i've done my work i make sure i go home so that i will have time with my children i make sure i don't have bible study wednesday night because i teach bible i make sure i don't have a business meeting on a friday because i have elders meeting i make sure i don't have business transaction on a sunday because that's worship day and i prepare so i do my part but it does not mean i'm lazy however after doing my part i learned to entrust to the lord and that is something that i want to teach young people after you've done your best by balancing your schedule you now entrust it to the lord my youngest daughter just visited us recently i think today or yesterday yesterday and we i was asked a question with my grandchildren asked me a question what does it mean to observe the sabbath day you do you understand their question what does it mean to observe the sabbath day and my daughter explained in her case in her case as a student she refuses to study on a sunday she will devote that to the lord now remember she's not legalistic she's not saying that applies to everybody in my case i don't do business on a sunday no matter what so you need to decide on your own what does it mean to trust god so for my daughter trusting god is she will do her best to study but then when it comes to sunday she devoted towards being god so for singles my advice is this as wow i like what you said about be the best person for your future wife to be because you want to be god's best also for your god's best am i correct so you do your part so for men to do your part you exercise don't have a big stoma you comb your hair you brush your teeth you have a good job you do your part and then after that relax god will bring them to you my wife is whispering to me she said take initiative take initiative right but you've got to do your part after that if the girl will snub you relax it's not the end of the world it's not for you there are many more women that won't snub you all i'm saying is relax do your part relax that is the key to overcoming anxiety all right do your part and then surrender everything else to the lord don't do the extreme do nothing just trust the lord just trust the lord i do not know how people develop that kind of crazy mindset you got to do your part and trust the lord but to do your part is the secret of the balance how do you do it this is a journey and god loves you god wants to protect you and god wants to bless all of you thank you so much to our dear panelists for sharing with us your life experiences and for the wisdom you've all imparted to us we'd also like to thank of course our participants who joined us tonight right babe thank you for spending time with us and for the interesting questions that we've tackled and that we've learned from yes we will still be closing and we will invite pastor peter to close us in prayer but we will just go through these announcements short announcements we would want to invite you uh our participants our loyal participants who are finishing the webinar for this evening we invite you to join our session two our session two will be shown on your screens right now okay because we will be having um victory over depression as our topic for this sunday we will be having another live family webinar and that would be with um edric and joy mendoza as their moderator pastor peter and this diona will be joining the panel again and then we will also be having some elevate representative and a big singles ministry representative and since we also learned so much about accountability and how it plays a big role in our lives as we do we deal with these toxic traits we want to take this opportunity to invite you yes you to join a d group so um dave let's ask i think the link is being sent to the chat now wherever you are facebook youtube zoom the the the link to how to join a small group is being sent and also we will be having supporting events so big fridays will also be carrying this topic elevate will also be carrying this topic and in fact even while women or while thursdays they will also be carrying these topics so this is the whole church-wide movement and we want you guys to be involved and to enjoy learning from the word of god in order to win the battles in our hearts and in our minds may we invite our senior pastor to close us all in prayer well before we close in prayer i want to praise god for edric mendoza for a good work in organizing this so edric i praise god for you and now hedrick i'm giving you this assignment will you close us in prayer son right because i know you're enjoying it so much but you need to do some work you know so close us in prayer it's a great sir i was enjoying watching everybody let's just pray guys uh great job team and thank you to everyone who's attending you know we're looking forward to the other series father we thank you for this night we thank you for just how you carried it through the amazing moderating of paul and claire and the amazing really insights and and lessons that we got from eunice from paulo from uh pastor peter and his wife and really all the different questions of the people from the three different platforms we we just want to continue to respond to the different family needs and these toxic realities that all of us are facing we continue to pray that if there are people who do not know you that this will be an opportunity for them to anchor themselves and their lives on you because you are really the only secret to overcoming and getting to any of these toxic realities whether in this pandemic or even after so we just continue to pray for that we look forward to the other series that you'll be unraveling and unfolding for all of us to learn from and we pray for continued engagement as we do these things to serve the families whatever their life stage young or old jesus name we pray amen amen amen amen and amen thank you so much once again thank you to our panelists you did a good job tonight may the lord bless you immensely and for those who participated we want to thank you for good job good job paul and claire you guys did an amazing job all of you fantastic job and of course ronnie our tech department you guys are all great oh god be the glory and now it's time to rest good night good evening pastor peter and good night everyone thank you god bless you and see you next wednesday [Laughter] bye you guys hi everyone god bless you okay time to spend time with my wife [Music] is oh [Music] you is my empathy jesus christ you are my one desire lord hear my only cry [Music] [Music] you are my [Music]

Channel: Christ’s Commission Fellowship

Views: 29,373

Rating: 4.9616389 out of 5

Keywords: CCF, Christ's, Commission, Fellowship, Sunday, Service, Sermon, Speaker, Message

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Length: 88min 59sec (5339 seconds)

Published: Wed Sep 08 2021