Leke Alder | 3 Cups of Affection, One Cup of Love

three cups of affection one cup of love as a title of my message and looking at the demographics of the church I assume that most of you are young and that you're at the stage in your life in which are contemplating marriage or you've been married for some years how many people have been married for 20 years now so I'm in the right church okay now what I'm trying to do this morning is to make you avoid the mistakes of my generation as respects marriage because there were mistakes that were made in our theology now you know I'm going to shoot straight to there are many people like Jack and Jill okay so you know I should straighten Jack and Jill and if you are not ready for straight talk well the door is open you say marriage is potent they have read young woman every young woman does he understand the potency of marriage if you do you will not approach Molly the way we do you know there's a program on on TV called love at first sight you know you meet somebody you don't know he just married that's a disaster in the making and that's because you don't know the potential marriage marriage is so potent that was Molly determinated a great man in Samson it was his wife who dominated him Amari despite despite all loved me he literally slept with the enemy that's how potent marriage is nobody could do something in except his wife because the potential marriage licenese deterministic capacity it has a capacity to determine your faith it has a ton of capacity to determine your fortune it has the capacity to fathom in your health how far you go in life it is the potent now it is so potent that is a natural context for that saying made by Jesus that if two people shall agree on earth as touching anything it shall be done of them in heaven in other was a potential model resonates in heaven another jurisdiction entirely is another political jurisdiction so we hang this whole schedule restriction to people a husband and a wife make a prayer of agreement and it resonates up there in another political jurisdiction incredible the potential marriage also lies in the fact that the statement that one shall put a flight a thousand but we shall put off light words ten thousand so in other words what we are talking about is not arithmetic progression but geometric progression it's not two plus two equals four it is two times two equals four and sometimes two raised to the power 32 that supporting technologies now I want to begin this morning by shattering some theology what is a theology we believe that marriage is a Christian thing I'm sorry to say it is not a Christian thing it is a humanity thing now this one marriage was instituted in the Garden of Eden it wasn't instituted on the cross Adam was not a Christian it is because knowledge is a humanity thing that God respects marital cultures so for example if in your culture drinking a cup of cold water is how you get married or recognize that marriage if in your culture jumping away broom is how you get married don't you recognize a marriage if in your culture it is Chihuahua is how you get married or recognize a marriage because God do miss a marriage within the culture elation on marriage is cultural now there is not even the marriage in church is cultural there is nothing sacrosanct my white wedding dress in fact the first person who wore the white wedding dress that is notable in history was Queen Victoria and that was 1940 February 10 today is actually the one 7 tonight anniversary of the white wedding dress before Queen Victoria brights used to wear black and red so there is nothing special about white dress now I'm not saying don't get married in church you get married in church there's something about receiving blessing in church and even if you don't have the money to do it in church in all this white wedding stuff go to the register got your pasta so is telling to bless you I mean lesson is never enough isn't that so so I'm not saying don't get married in job and just send don't get notorious nonsense do you understand what I'm trying to say if you are born in the Bible advises you to marry and say don't wait on 302 million naira go and get married in the registry I'm talking to somebody today go and get married in the registry come to church get the blessing tell your parents in law that very soon you'll be rich and you are coming to do proper engagements as we fits their daughter the understand and say and then tell your bride that you'll be rich and you're going to do proper proposal you got to take out of France or take her to Rome or take her to Vienna or any of those places and just you know she has to say yes all the way again the eurozone and say now because money to say humanity thing it leads us to two conclusions and two things that are very evident before us it follows therefore that a non-christian couple or a non-believer can have a wonderful marriage how many people have seen people that are not Christians about wonderful marriages there for marriage is not a Christian thing is a humanity thing the second conclusion that it leads us to is the fact that a wonderful Christian couple can have a terrible marriage how many people have seen Christians with terrible marriages you know there are homes that you go to and you feel like running out the atmosphere their home is so dense there's so much wrong forgiveness there's so much ill-will there's so much and you know I just feel like and the atmospheric pressure is so high that it won't the man cannot stay in the home now what God did the linkage between marriage and Christianity is that God took the principle of headship and unity that is a marriage and use that as a fusion principle of Christ and the church and because it was anticipatory in the Garden of Eden when the Bible pronounced when God pronounced that that you bruise the head of the serpent and the servants of Brazil remember the quotation talk to me you remember the quotation okay now the moment got pronounced that it means therefore that that was article anticipatory in unsymmetric potency of marriage what am I saying at that moment in time management from vintage cultural and social into spiritual and governmental that is why marriage is so strong it's one of the greatest institutions on earth they have very few government is an institution marriage is another institution that is right you never see anybody come out of Molly do the same it processes you you can never come out of marriage the same where I also want dies or your wife dies or there is divorce or there's a breakdown of law and order you can never call because married processes it's pretend Marie just sent people to asylums it's destroyed else but it's also transcended some people into heaven when you have a good marriage it's heaven on earth when there's peace in your home it's heaven on earth when it's love in your home when a woman loves you I'm talking to the men now when a woman loves you there is nothing like the love of a woman men don't have that emotional capacity to be so focused to love a man with such eternity now the problem with that kind of passion is that when she turns that passion against you she's going to destroy you destroy serve destroyed our home a boy wrote to me the other day and she said that you know I manage so my fun and self dating five girls at the center I said you don't know what you are playing with because all it takes is for one of those women to be angry with you and she's going to destroy you even though there are five of them you're going to find out five in the number of grace does not apply in this situation now a conjugal theology is based on half knowledge and I want you to see you see in life you don't blame anybody you you you can't have a bad marriage and blame your posture and blame your ante and blame your your father or your uncle you can't say they made me my resource also because God expects you to check the Bible yourself now a political philosophy is based on half knowledge there are three dimensions to marriage in the Bible and I'll show you those dimensions the first dimension is logical sensuality and sexuality that's the first cluster the second cluster is friendship and romance I want you to do something draw a triangle okay at the top of the triangle put sensuality and sexuality have you got that now at the no one left side of the triangle put friendship and romance and the last circle on the right side of the Franco put beautifulness and responsibility now what is wrong with our theology we totally define marriage in terms of dutifulness and responsibility and eliminate sensuality and sexuality and romance and friendship and so the table is not balanced that table that is not balanced has produced so many divorces in Christendom has produced so many instances of unhappiness it's unimaginable because if I would eat the table is don't balance we believe that sensuality and sexuality is so simple and so canal so much so that when couples marry on their wedding night they get on their knees and pray to God to have sex we believe that distance R so canal and that's therefore you are not supposed to be doing these things there is nothing wrong in sex itself your descendants a from God's perspective it is context that makes the sex right or wrong sex is not a problem for God it was one who created it and some believe that the only reason that sex should be marriage is for the purpose of procreation that's also a no distorted view now if you that is your theology at some point you are going to run into some contradictions because you will not be able to appreciate the totality of your wife it's not possible once the relatives two clusters all you will have is a dutiful marriage you provide for your home you provide for your children your wife will cook for you you will go to church together what kind of marriage is that there's nothing it's just beautiful nests and at some point you are going to get tired of that dutifulness it's like every Sunday we know this what we are supposed to do all your life you are just working to provide for your family there's no happiness there's no joy why because we eliminated sensuality and sexuality we eliminated romance and friendship now the sexes are by us two two clusters now dutifulness now I want you to do another thing now draw an upside down see a light see upside down on what side of the sea under the tree put dutifulness and responsibility on the right side put sensuality and sexuality and on the left side puts friendship and romance it's a dutifulness on that guards both aspects including sensuality and sexuality in other words if you neglect to sleep with your husband for example you are creating distortions they say duty to sleep with him that the Bible prescribes but the Bible says go beyond that and I'm going to show you in scriptures in the same manner friendship was also critical in marriage now if you look at those two things those two dimensions sexuality and sensuality friendship and romance you are going to find that the sexes have a bias to hide out the truth for example you are going to find that man I am not prone to sensuality and sexuality it is why we love Twix three girls it's like we love girls in beginning it's like the boyfriend will ask you for a new teacher it's right man I'm not prone to what fun because they are more at the aggravate not with sensuality and sexuality on the other hand the women tend to move even more romance and what and friendship that is why she will ask you to zip a dress before you came along she wasn't zip in a dress that's why she wants words that's why she wants compliments because that thing is so important to women it's why the toaster gets away with the best girls because the woman wants friendship she wants romance so if you a man in this place and you are not getting it right sucks it out you know i decry the fact that they said that they should no longer study history and the arts and all those things in school and I wish you focus on Sciences are you going to express love when you don't even understand poetry say whatever you like about those old letters we used to write but they were done with social media are you flowing with me I'm just saying that when it comes to the sexuality this is an r-rated session if you are below it in please because I'm going to say it straight it is a sexuality and sensuality buyers the with menses sex is in terms of Comcast's that is why you see some of them rip s in terms of conquest that is right now if you're a rapist I will recommend Paul's adjudication there should be cast off cut off that's not to get a girl you're an idiot now give you the methodology okay so it is why is it that concussed thing is why during sex men want feedback so the mother woman groans the monkey things that is you know that's a measure of a man's virility am I making sense to you the more the woman seems comatose and and can't help herself because of the man that is the fact that the money ejaculates doesn't mean that he enjoyed the sex ejaculation is a natural byproduct of manual stimulation if you take a dog and you do the same thing it will ejaculate that's a biological function it's the feedback therefore you can't be a wife and just lie down there tell the man to do his stuff and just roll over and the next thing you are snoring there is no feedback so it's not enjoying the sex even though in terms of dutifulness we are providing the sex because when you go for counseling and they say is the assets you will say what yes but did the man enjoy the sex no in the same way a wise man who set the atmosphere in a home so that when it demands for that feedback during sex it will be given freely if there is no atmosphere in the home if you are not trusting your wife all day and I mean trust your wife all day send kisses send affection send emojis send what's of affection sometimes ask for a photograph at work I might making sense come on tell me am i making sense okay so romance means a lot to women sexuality means it lots of men when there is no friendship and romance what will happen is that the woman becomes dry during sex in fact some because clump up down there there's nothing that can go in there's nothing that can come out they just come up like a suction pump now you can't imagine that biological phenomenon but it is real why because you did not do the things that softens are up to receive that dutifulness of sexuality and the need that you have because the man as need the Bible describes the woman as a well that is you know that is third and the man as a fountain you know that was one is self rew possessor propellant the other one is stimulation am I making sense now why do we concentrate on dutifulness and responsibility it's because someone in completely the no structures so basic theology is centered on that remember officials 522 treated three wise we submitted to us once remember it's a famous scripture for men the men are pretending as if they don't know the scripture talk to a young wise we submitted husbands even the first statements in that section of the Bible is be submitted one to another you are interpreting scriptures in terms of your cultural provincialism has it occurred to you that even though Christ is the head as he takes instructions from us God feed me today it will feed you God go with me it will go with you so there is nothing like master-servant relationship in a married that is african culture of professionalism and because you don't follow the logic see if you want to be an African no problem if you want to be a Christian no problem the problem comes when you mix the two do you understand the movements you want to do African culture up from Michelle ISM you must be ready to marry three wives you must be ready for war in your home you must be ready for you know did you fly in which way the on the Sun ran say but you can mix the two you can't say that your mother is the most important person in your life when your wife is there that is African stuff I'm saying if that's what you want to do follow through but you can't claim to be a Christian and the following Christian principles and place your mother as a man above your wife the concept doesn't even arise is it it's nonsense that's like comparing block and orange what asked you are you going to marry your mother can you sleep with your mother so can you know but you know that you are dealing with a distortion and just saying if you want to be an African be an African if you want to be a Christian be a Christian the principle in scriptures is both of you submit one to another period he now gives an example of the submission of a man by saying that the man she loved is right in a particular way and it gives an example of the submission of the woman by stating all those laws that's what the Bible says don't believe what people say read the Bible yourself the barians mighty power was written and those guys went to check whether what it was saying was true don't be lazy the biggest room of laziness is intellectual laziness when you can't even check what is available freely available to you by yourself now Ephesians 5:22 2:23 focus on dutifulness and obligations it does not talk about sexuality on sexuality it does not talk about friendship or romance it is therefore not God's total instructional marriage it just enumerates the duty of care and the degree of care it doesn't deal with sex at all if you want to understand sex you have to go to another of plus letters which is first Corinthians 7:2 to 6 can we see the message translation 1st Corinthians 7:2 260 of it on the screen message translation place but let me continue while they are looking for that now some of you have been wondering one of these sexual positions that are permissible in marriage do you do doggy style do you do missionary position do you do acrobatic you know displayed you spring from the ceiling or whatever you know I'm a real person and you guys top in religious on me come on you know what I'm talking about ok is that message translation look into they look at that such hard drives are strong but marriage is strong enough to contain them and provides a balanced and fulfilling sexual life in a world of sexual disorder the managed bed must be a place of what of what they ask one second to satisfy the wife the wife students are try the other one in other words every position is ok because of the principle of mutuality and service if Savin him means agreeing to this position it must also serve you balance your position it's a place of mutuality in fact the scripture says that is not a place to prove your fundamental human rights it says so why are you guys looking at me as if it's in the Bible now in order now I know some of you are missionaries anything the missionary position is you know it's okay if it's your cup of tea Paul says that as long as there's mutuality and as long as they're service that sexy of every other thing doesn't it so it's reaching both of you God doesn't want to know if you like pray it's okay if you like fast it's okay once it's ready giving you his word it doesn't want to know certain things there's some things in left to your discretion unless I want you to go back to the scripture I want to show the young men something mutuality okay now it says that sexual drives are strong but that one of the things that are capable of containing them is marriage now some people are too spiritual to acclimate that simple scripture they are too holy libido is a very very strong thing especially for men and it gets to the point in life is at this stage of your life looking at the demographic of the church it's not so obvious the true test of power and restraint is when you have money to finance in the day you get to that point in which you can tell Asaka Metreon parish that's when you know whether you're a Christian or not because libido is strong it's a shocker what I'm trying to let you see is that don't go into self-denial when you read some 62 the Bible says that we all arrive at one point or the other loaded our sins overwhelming us and that garage like seeds and paraphrase it now when we come come to him and say it as it is a young man ought to be able to go to God and say God this thing is tough for me you've got to bring a shock a fast so that we can marry but the moment you go to go and dancing and you are Alpha and Omega the the you know and it's just like what is wrong with this more boy now the understand you've got to be real that's the kind of relationship I have with God you've got to be real and affirm that is a higher form of relationship rather than all the religious for the sake nonsense that doesn't impress anybody doesn't impress God in knows the thoughts of your heart the last lesson should be track is not your doctor is not your lawyer is God that's it last one she be trying to you know you are forming last last you suffer now let's take a closer look at romance and friendship now the reason I want us to take a closer look you won't always have sex the understand the largest swath of marriage is controlled by romance and friendship you won't even always have romance it's a friendship should I tell people make sure you marry your friend and if you were not friends before you marriage after marriage make sure you become friends your best friends cannot be another woman if you a man we are looking for trouble women are free and exclusive please write that devii a man they are proprietary women are so proprietary that the woman was still another man's another woman's husband and sickly Mita Sehun that's our proprietary they are they exclusive and then they will fight another girl who is trying to steal a stolen Osmund talk about the exclusivity the unison and try to explain why things are the way they are to you from scriptures now the last fessing we want to go to for romance is that they're called Pau Pau was not the romantic kind of guy in fact he thought all this woman Auslan kind of thing was an inefficient use of his energy that guy just wanted to pretty gospel I get into trouble poor preach celibacy in fact some of the scriptures that were caught in Corinthians against divorce is not really about divorce is about celibacy Pope really bases so much that the young men didn't want to marry that's why Paul says that if you've been engaged to a woman marry her but that in the context of the times the period they were in which was a time of persecution it was wise not to marry any time Paul never thought you should marry anyway and so much so that you know these guys were looking forward to Jesus coming so much so at that time Paul roots at that time he thought he would see Jesus come she was reaching centerpieces of the last cup we want to go for romance is well it does he understand it and thank God he married a woman will also fudge it wasn't a bad guy you know he just said that he didn't have the gift not every you know being a husband is a gift it's a gift not everybody has a gift some people are born to be celibate Jesus give you three categories of Enoch those who make themselves you know for the sake of the kingdom those are the celebrates for the kingdom now if you've been wondering whether celibacy is for you if you've been thinking of a shocker celibacy is not for you causes any basis for Islam for you all you see is just a biological entity that you meet in church to preach the gospel you will never see a Shack as a woman you know it's one thing to see a shark as a human beings under than to see a shark as a woman so if you've been thinking of a shark as a woman frustrate celibacy's know for you okay now the first mission of romance that we see in the Bible was Isaac and Rebecca you know there was a guy called a peeping tom called you know Abimelech I was looking through his window and it some of this guy and this got pet in each other you know heavy petting it wasn't you know what I mean you know shame Issa you know they wasn't that kind of thing it was a bit messy because if it was he and my sister and everything oh I love you I love you it won't have said no that's your wife they won't win stuff that only husband and wife can do so he came to the conclusion that ah you know why did he come to that country because in some Oh Sammy I'm Rebecca and something about that guy's family and Abraham's family you know there's generation after generation they always wanted the women that he brought family wanted and I'm saying why don't you go and ask a brand for the formula okay if we want to learn about romance I'm talking in their movie romance the guy to go to is Solomon it was a bad guy married 700 wives and 300 concubines no one day died young it died at the age of 58 or 59 either 58 or 59 so else can't agree on the time when you have 1,000 women you are going to die young I want us to look at Song of Songs chapter 4 I want those who look at one two five are we there is it on the body okay are we there this is what Solomon wrote I'm pleased I know Christians have tried to virtualize Song of Songs you know to say you know when you would arrive at an absurdity why do you think God wants to spiritualize romance it was the one who include everything in the Bible because of all those guys who are so spiritual they can't even marry sound of songs you are so beautiful my darling so beautiful it sounds like me talking to my wife you know I don't want to say some things and your dog eyes are veiled by your hair as it flows and shimmers in other was uses all thrashing like a flock of goats in the distance trimming down a hillside in the sunshine your smile is generous and full expressive and strong and clean your lips are dual red your man with elegant and inviting you will check soft and radiance the smooth lift lines of your neck of man notice all heads turn in and admiration your breasts are like fawns twins of a gazelle grazing among the fostering class we are still in church some men find it hard to toast they've been praying but they don't know how to toast you got to learn toasting from the master himself how did Solomon toast I want you to note you know you have to understand the psyche of women the psyche of women it's not the same psyche as men but so yeah my psyche is the same cycle notice something when you meet women you know my wife's family my father-in-law had six girls no boys so they're always a wonder to be and you know our house is the international headquarters you know there are some that live in Canada's only the u.s. some live in Nigeria you know and all the sudden you know when they congregate in our home and they are together I just retire myself to my den you know I just leave them alone now when women are talking about themselves when they are talking about their beauty a woman never comes and says you look so beautiful from head to toe women don't talk like that it is men who do holism when women talk they do what he called deconstructivism they focus on anatomical specifics so for example here your eyes are large your eyeballs are large your hair is long they never talk about your face or your body they just say you know your skin is glowing they deconstruct each other and begin to point out two anatomical specifics in other words if you want to toast a woman don't go to and say you are the Alpha at the Rose of Sharon you are the the because sometimes is this lack of knowledge you just be suffering for nothing your libido is high I circus not coming we are fastened and brain everybody thinks you have AIDS because your trousers are no longer you know they are falling down they don't know is fasting and brain all you needed to do and if you damage me try it after service you'll see ash okay oh my I never noticed your eyeballs they're so much you know your and if you smudge man remember you have to focus on anatomical series not so so if you notice that last Sunday she came with braids and this Sunday she come in with what a Brazilian here I said oh there's something there's something different about you don't say you don't say straight like that just say there's something different about you this is your hair oh it must be your of course you need was I yeah because you have to make this the same natural you can't be a JD Co you know be performing for me Nana you know you have to be confident because women know confidence I know what decided to date a guy because you know not too many people are the confidence to walk up to her and the first guy that had the confidence to walk up to her if she considered so you got to be confident you know I'm strong in the illustrator this is the time to apply it now notice something Solomon mentioned about a skin tone the skin tone is not produced by Vaseline we've been taking of their skin I'm just saying that when you marry there's something that is called extra body at reprovision why because that's thin scripture that you like to quote efficient strength treat effect in 2003 also talks about taking care of your wife isn't that so so that's part of it let's extrapolate through provision you see my wife knowing you see her hairpin don't you see I'm looking at a menace money if you never had a reason to want to succeed in life this is it's the ability to pay for Brazil and here for glowing skin and pay for massage pedicure manicure manicure also secures money on stretto things do you understand I've been real you know I said something on Twitter yesterday and some young men who women wagon so I said okay because if sometimes you so I made this statement I said sometimes you tell young men and women practical truth and they say they don't want to hear that at that point life steps and decides to be a teacher it's just a now the petition with their lives I'm saying that some of the suffering that you've been going through are totally unnecessary just of the boldness to walk up to a shark and tell a shocker and I never notice your skin glows in the Sun you will see an instant smile on her face that is trying to avoid me Nicole get smile really is that so of course she knows she's just waiting I've been waiting for your compliment let me tell you something when it's not the mentor when we sing all this is somebody me so here these things it's not the men that marry the woman is a woman that married the men when you are still preparing and we know those that she's waiting for you at the bus stop you will catch up most of the communication between a man and a woman is non-vocal it's body language its disposition so what she does is that she makes herself she disposes ourselves to you if you don't know to read sign language and read foolish young man that's gone ok now you would notice something in the passage that the analogy the poet Solomon is using is an agrarian economy analogy so it's talking about what gazelle did you see that ok let me read it out early the smooth little lines of your neck on man notice ornate stone in hall and admiration your breasts are like what fawns twins of a gazelle gresner now if Solomon were writing now it would not be right in gazelle one of these talking about is the perkiness of the woman's breasts and nipples and things that the fact that it's fun in other words the person that is described in here is most likely not a 32d d most likely is describing a Tati see now if you don't know what's attitude DD means or that CC means you need stretcher preyas parcel yummy you have work to do one is trying to say is that this bib that is toasting Lewis's wife it's actually Victoria Secret model the total description is that of a Victoria's Secret model as a woman there are things that you did is I can tell the men to give you the money to do this but the truth is that some women are careless and you must be careful not to present a quiénes version of yourself to your husband it's a it's not everything that a man says to a woman they are stuff that are going on in his head and when you keep on presenting a callous version of yourself to yours when it comes back from work you're in booboo or you're in a row and booba you know you know meet up yeah not you understand I'm not saying that is an excuse for the guy to run out and between stuff that's what I'm saying I'm saying why creates attention in your home I said when you know that I shock you at work it's looking very nice stop presenting stop taking your husband for granted stop taking your wife for granted and it's stupid it means that you don't understand human psychology and human makeup I know what the Bible says the Bible presents you an idea distich proposition and as rich noting things to inspire - but the reality of our lives that sometimes we fall short of the glory of God don't create easy men like excuses as system from reason when a guy goes to mess up outside there's a reason there's an excuse when they create excuses they crave what's called justification so for example if you fought and you've been fighting for one week it uses that as a justification to do what he wants to do it's an excuse it's not the reason do you understand what I'm saying don't give him that opportunity because it's set under you're given the opportunity men have visual they are totally visual if you like describe it say it not once this is a picture that's it and men have what you call template ranges you see not all of us will be attracted to the same kind of woman but if you notice some men like Britney Spears look some people like name one oh duster you understand essay range so as long as the range exist the man goes for it it doesn't matter what presents itself within that range do you understand what I'm saying so for example if he likes women with flowing hair on yellow girls and everything whether it is 10% yellow 20% yellow 30% yellow 40% you will go for it don't give him the opportunity or the excuse to go for it by presenting a careless Russian of yourself that's gone look at verses 6 to 7 in verses 6 to 7 we see Solomon dive into the architecture of his wives are not o me the sweet fragrant curves of your body the soft spiced contours of your flesh invites me and I come I stay until dawn breaks its light and night slips away you are beautiful from head to toe my dear love beautiful beyond compare absolutely flawless if a smart man your wife is always without compare if he s much man your wife is so obvious notice that women contests their beauty with television figures if you are watching a TV and say oh that woman looks beautiful you they look on your wife because women are totally territorial including TV I want to show you some things look at verses 8 to 15 I'm going to read come with me from Lebanon in at this stage remember that Solomon is rich enough to buy he's telling the cockamamie tree in France right my bride leave Lebanon behind and come you captured my heart dear friend you looked at me and I fell in love won't look my way and I was obviously in love how beautiful your love dear dear friends far more pleasing than a fine red wine your fragrance more exotic than select spices the kisses of your lips are honey my love every syllable you speak a delicacy to savor your clothes smell like the wild outdoors the ozone scents of high mountains they are love and friend US Secret Garden a fountain a private and fair fountain body and soul you I paradise a whole orchard of succulent fruits ripe apricots and peaches oranges and pears not written cinnamon all centered woods mint and lavender and whole herbs and aromatic a garden fountain sparkling and splashing fed by Springs from the Lebanon Mountains what was not ROTC what's he doing here what Solomon tree near the first thing that did notice that he called his wife is friend didn't notice that okay so we've established your wife was your friend the second thing that we noticed that the ladies culturally exposed Solomon spoke about artists cultural exposure increases your Worth and value as a woman don't just read motivational books or Christian books read white read fur because men the way men see women within Marita sativum boyfriend/girlfriend relationship they love to them a woman is a trophy it's something they display you know she's something they display so amongst men when men talk one of the apart from money as pecking order the nest pecking order is the beauty of the wife a presentation so it's not unlikely that you hear men talking about oh my wife went to Oxford now the women don't hear that but that's what we discuss and you're going to see a man workers say Nick how are you ah look at you guys money is going that's actually one of my friends you know that's the way men talk so you got to be culturally exposed we also introduced to this woman perfumes and body sense did you notice now let me say something here there is what a phenomenal phenomenon every woman has a unique smell when certain sense are mixed with those unique sense that produce a pregnancy the missus of the neural wiring of a young man's brain these are wondrous odd things every woman I see you next see see those who meander selfish most of them don't use perfume but there are men who are crazy about the smell that you can stand isn't that so because of their pheromones now if you notice this woman she likes certain kinds of perfume you are going to find that she likes mint she likes flowery scent Ivy notice because he's talking about lavender mint and lavender halves you know in other words you can almost see this woman she music says sense that is either minty of flowery or potent enough like you know it's it's it has a strong base you know all those women that they walked into a place and long after they are gone you can still smell the poignancy of the perfume that they're wearing because that's a strong base what that tells us is their different sense for different occasions and different seasons and different places so I don't expect you to wear heavy scent to church auto office there are some light sense now as a woman you ought to know that and don't tell me these things don't matter that tsuitachi that matters the God who made man says that they matter the next thing that you want to see is that Solomon said that this is how the woman got him you know sometimes you are looking at Sunday and you don't know how to get to me let me tell you the secret they mentioned please close their ears it's called the look Solomon's they won't look and you got me what is the look you know when a woman is looking at you in church you can sense that somebody's looking at you then you turn ordinarily the woman shall have water eyes but a socket does not averted eyes she maintains that look so that you will know that she's looking at you that is called the look she wants you to know that you are now cross s only God can deliver you do you understand this these are well known secrets in the Bible now we can talk let me address a boyfriend/girlfriend thing so that we can Randall there is no protocol in the Bible for boyfriend/girlfriend relationship there's only protocol for marriage you are not going to find instruction on boyfriend/girlfriend relationship and the concept of engagement that we have now it's not the concept of betrothal in the death of Joseph Amelie they are two different things in fact if you notice yourself a marry you are going to find out that the Bible did not that they broke up he says he wanted to divorce her the concept of betrothal in those days and Bible times was like marriage so there is nothing we are going to use a standard or as measurements or anything all you can do it's a draw wisdom from case studies in the Bible and from instructions in the Bible to regulate your fears in a boyfriend reference relationship common sense dictates therefore that if you are looking for a spouse you must look at those three circles sexuality and sensuality friendship and romance dutifulness undressing lady you must look for all those three the problem comes when you concentrate on one and ignore the others for example is a smooth talker it's a handsome guy when it touches you your head spins to the fourth dimension however he has no job it's an irresponsible young man who is used to women taking care of him because his mother took care of his father do you understand what I'm saying you are going to suffer in them marriage because there is nothing you can do to change that guy's natural disposition that's how I was brought up that sides always lived and you're going to find that they got the one trying and trying and trying you know I was told a story yesterday again a guy takes a girl to the movies it's the one who called and said let's go to the movies they get to the movies and the guy in charge of ticketing does the ticket and she says 4-thousand era and the guy's looking then the girl is looking and again looked at him and is still looking like lawanda Luqman so the girl brings out a card and pays for the movie I said that was a mistake she shall have booked out at that point in time she did she did walk out eventually when the gotten said movie all by the way the guy was also pointing out popcorn and so when they got inside the cinema she pretended she wanted to go and answer a call got into a car and drove home with tells Joseph she was also the one who drove them to the venue I'm not against we start somewhere in life in fairness to young men it's tough the the responsibility and the express it is it's it is it's tough especially if you had the firstborn oh no no let me correct that if you are the first son you know there's a different reinforcement and for some in the Bible for example Ishmael is a firstborn Isaac is a foursome so in every family you have foursome we are first body the first one is not always a foursome the first one is the one everybody looks up to is one across fast succeeds and takes care of everybody so as a first son it's tough that's a way we brought up my Foss my son that we didn't do that for my daughter because it's the first son it was brought up tougher because life would throw things at him that he never expected so by the time I am NOT saying you must have messages I did you're 23 or 24 and so what I'm saying but the girl must be able to look at you and say these guys going somewhere and wherever is going I want to go with but by the time you are pumping out 20 not to popcorn and sprite in a movie theater I don't know about your generation but you know you guys behave as if love was invented by Facebook I am sorry I'm old-fashioned I don't know how you can take a lady out and expect her to pay a fair share of of the mill I don't know how and all these things that you think you are before Matson life is waiting for you you will realize that love is over six thousand years old it wasn't for me it wasn't formulated in 2011 be a man if you don't have money tell us okay I don't have the money I just wanted to take his rule do you understand and you see a Shaka can we go for a cook I'm sorry I can't afford it because I'm trying to put money together to get us an apartment so that we can marry then forthrightness the division that you have and disincentive for trade is not supporting things because then she knows you are serious Vida and you are going somewhere and that you have your head controlled now you don't get lost but you can't go and visit it has a case of a guy who goes similarly buying supplies and everything and after his brother flies cancer for money for transport to go back home what's wrong with you get nine guys disgracing do you understand what I'm saying now so take care of all those clusters they're pertinent questions you must ask yourself do I like a mushy or ebooks am i attracted to him or her physically can I imagine sleeping within maja can we be friends go out together just feel comfortable with each other can I go to sutures with Imahara can he take care of me and the children we said take care of me does he have a job isn't responsible is he using me how well does he handle money can I trust him does he care about me and to the men let me tell you something when a woman tells you don't worry less money let's just marry we will sleep on the floor together that's promise only lasts one day the pressure you are going to come under you you will not believe it because after sleeping flow for one day you can see what will happen I'm saying asses questions lastly two points as a single person don't use wrong parameters for marriage what is the wrong parameter you come to church you sit on day is a wonderful ocean always impeccably dressed is like traffic warden when it does this red sign when it does this green sign when it does this magenta the church is always well organized that has nothing to do with marriage it's not a qualification for marriage the qualification for marriage is different from qualification for OSHA you have to test him outside the church setting the understand it's a music mistake that my generation made they married head of children's church Anna's in that it would be good Mother's the married woman who can sing and bring down heaven and they thought that that's a place where she would be taking place in the house don't use wrong parameters for marriage lastly don't put your pastor under the kind of pressure that you shouldn't subject him to don't expect your pastor to do divination for you there is not one instance of marital divination in the newest Testament instead such in the Old Testament haven't found your pastor is no babalawo is no tradition don't go to him and say pastor C vision for me to add a deep how can your pastor know your secret passions it doesn't know you the Bible says only you can know you nobody knows whether you like yellow burbs all the pastor can say that a shaka is a nice children Scott Walker that has nothing to do with wife because there are many wonderful children's church workers that are terrible wives don't put that pressure on your pasta well I want to thank you for listening you

Channel: Global Impact Church TV

Views: 8,308

Keywords: Leke Alder, Yemi Davids, Love, Affection, Marriage, Global Impact Church

Id: DnuxVf7NkRw

Length: 63min 24sec (3804 seconds)

Published: Thu Feb 21 2019