Karen is Pregnant With Her 8th Baby! r/EntitledPeople

hey there Mr redder here welcome back to another episode of Reddit podcast stories where today my broke sister is having her eighth baby and she's upset that I'm not happy for her I'm 16 female and I'm the younger sister to Lori who's 26 me and Lori have never been close since we had different dads I wasn't a fair baby she's always resented me for ruining her family but whatever Lori has seven kids yes seven all who are under the age of seven despite the fact that Lori is incapable of taking care of these kids four of them were actually planned because she knows my pushover mom will give her money and watch the kids my mom even quit her job to do so even turning her work room into a nursery for Carl we're pretty well off but we can't do this forever I try not to judge and just ignore Lori like she does me even though when my mom is busy doing something like changing a diaper I have to step in and help especially with the twins since they're very rough with each other tonight at dinner Lor's boyfriend joined a father to just Carl as well as Lor's father this wasn't abnormal so I didn't think anything of it until my sister said she had some exciting news I wished she'd say something else but I knew what she was going to say I'm pregnant she would say everyone went dead silent until I said bruh I didn't mean to say it out loud but come on Lori gave me a death stare and said if I wanted to say something I should just say it so I did Lori this is your I take a moment to count them eighth kid you know we can't keep supporting you without Mom you'd be on the streets and you know that look at Mom she's so tired she's always taking care of your kids and so am I I'd bet i' changed More Diapers than you have you selfish jerk she began to cry and ran out into her boyfriend's car he followed her and drove my mother then began to cry too she left to go get Carl back to bed bed since he woke up it was just me and Lorie's father he began to yell and told me I was a brat and Lori was a great mother then he stormed off as I'm sitting here in the morning watching the boys I'm thinking was I too obnoxious my mom says that a lot I don't mean to be because of my autism but come on please give me some feedback Reddit am I the jerk not the jerk if it were me I would completely stop helping to watch the kids I can't stand when people Pawn their kids off on family members it really ticks me off since it happened to me as a kid my parents decided to have more kids when I was 10 14 and then again when I was 17 guess when I moved out at 17 not the jerk sorry I'm a mother to a 17 and a 15-year-old and bruh is a common saying in my household good on you for calling her out and sticking up for your mother that's not fair to these kids or your mother you're the jerk there is no we we we can't keep supporting you we can't do this forever your parents' relationship and support of their daughter and grandkids has nothing to do with you and is not your business to judge sorry Reddit Bozo but if someone's taking advantage of a family member of mine you bet your but I'm going to judge it and say something about it so who do you think is the jerk op or her sister please let us know eight kids and she's making the grandma raise them but Karen if everyone had a brain we wouldn't have half of these stories read okay fair enough Karen demands I pay her medical bills my parents had me at 16 they were both in high school after I was born my father dropped out to work full-time and take care of me so my biological mother could stay in school eventually after finishing high school she realized that motherhood wasn't for her and left my dad and me I was two so I don't really remember her being around after that my father worked three times as hard to provide for me he also met a nice woman whom he later married when I was seven I'll consider her my mom I'll call her my stepmother to avoid confusion my biological mom didn't contribute in any way not even financially in fact the last time she contacted me before now was on my third birthday which was just a quick happy birthday card through the mail I never had ill feelings towards her decision because I had my dad mom and brother who filled the emptiness she left my parents have never said anything negative about her her leaving me was not something I thought about every day so you can imagine my confusion when she reached out on social media to talk I thought about it for days before I agreed we met in a restaurant for the first time in 25 years it was awkward Small Talk At the beginning before we delved into why she left my biological mother teared up while explaining why she suffered from postpartum depression and felt trapped by the constant cycle so she felt compelled to leave she explained why she reached out and made it clear that she didn't leave because of me of of course I sympathized with her as I saw my stepmom go through postpartum depression with my brother and saw how much it affected her we met a couple more times before I was invited to meet her new family she had a husband and also three kids who are 13 11 and 7 after weeks of this I had my most recent meet up with my biological mother she looked distressed while greeting me so I asked if anything happened she then explained to me in a quick response that her oldest daughter who's 13 has health issues I won't say what due to how sensitive it is she explained that she needs $25,000 for medication and has accumulated medical bills of $2,000 she asked if I could pay it off for context after graduating and receiving my post-graduate diploma I landed my dream job that earned a good sum of money I'm certain she may have heard about where my job was from somewhere and saw it as an opportunity she gave me time to think about it it didn't take long for me to say no I felt used and exploited she never wanted to meet me she just wanted money from the kid she left to help the other kid that she loves after giving her my response which wasn't much just a simple no I don't feel comfortable with that through text I was soon bombarded with text messages from her husband telling me what a nasty jerk I was followed by more texts from my biological mother about how I'm so cruel for not helping out my sister due to my grudge against her and then to top it all off I was getting some messages from family members from her side of the family questioning why I'm being so difficult so am I really terrible for not paying for my half sister's medication and medical bills info not that it really matters but did she ever pay child support to your father because if she didn't she might owe you $220,000 op the only thing she paid for after leaving was a $3 birthday card and I'm glad she showed me what she really wanted early on so I could cut her off quickly also my mom adopted me when I was six update I've learned more about what was happening in my biological Mom's family first of all I question why she had three more kids despite her postpartum depression it turns out that she and her husband found out early on about the severity of their first daughter's illness they had two additional kids as Savior siblings for their oldest daughter's medical treatment neither of them were matches I've currently blocked her and her husband I didn't go into this expecting to reconnect with my biological mom that wasn't the plan I already have a mom and I didn't need another one I just wanted to give her a chance to explain herself I never wanted a motherdaughter bond just to be cordial or friendly my family supported me in meeting my biological parent and I didn't Blindside them I'm happy with my own family and I don't need her to complete it it's not her leaving that bothers me it's her current actions but even through all of that I'll sympathize with her only on the basis that she suffered with PPD when my biological mom left my grandparents and biological Aunt stood by my dad they raised me alongside my parents they said she's always been mentally unstable and manipulative I feel bad for my half sister but I can't give her the money sometimes I wish I had ignored my biological mom from the beginning also I blocked The Strangers calling my phone a while back just forgot to add that in you know if that half sister wasn't sick op would never have heard from her egg donor at all ever am I the jerk for telling my niece she'll have to move out if she's not my nanny anymore I'm a single mom to two kids who are eight and six I work as a nurse 3 days a week I work 12-hour shifts 12:00 p.m. to 12:00 a.m. after my husband passed I needed a nanny to tend to my kids from the time they got off school 3:00 p.m. onwards I decided a livein was the best choice I have one guest bedroom I live right near university around this time my niece had just gotten accepted she wanted to save cost on dorms and and offered to watch my kidss those 3 days if she could live there rentree I agreed and said I'd also pay her $22 an hour a competitive rate for our area she's done with her classes by one so it works out she fixes them dinner and puts them to bed then she's free to do whatever but of course I pay her from 3:00 p.m. to 12:30 a.m. it worked for 2 years my niece never had any complaints now however my niece is getting a paid internship related to her major that starts in January AR she wouldn't be available to watch the kids I congratulated her and said I could help her look into student housing or an apartment we'd have 3 months to do this she was confused I said since I would need a livein and only have one guest room she would have to move out my niece got upset and said this isn't fair she won't be able to save any money if she gets a dorm or an apartment she could afford to live on her own but wouldn't have much savings I pointed out that this would work best for me as I had to put my kids in after care the other two days that I work I get off around 5: and the nanny could just pick them up from school versus them having to stay there so long my niece argued that the nanny could leave at the end of her shift but after speaking to some nannies they understandably don't want to drive home so late plus I'm fine with the nanny and my niece sleeping after the kids do so there's no sense in them sleeping than waking up and driving so drowsy even I feel nervous driving home so late especially after my long shift my sister-in-law her Mom feels this is unfair to my niece but she moved in under the condition that she'd work as a nanny my sister-in-law and brother live 3 hours away so nie couldn't commute if she moved back in with them they feel I should try to find a nanny who'd be willing to drive home at 12:30 a.m. it would take me a half hour minimum to get home but all the nannies I've spoken to said no or expressed concerned about their safety driving so late am I the jerk edit the internship is all semester long my my niece isn't interested in nannying at all going forward and will instead be pursuing internships she has no desire to work after her internship is over for the day she knew from the jump that I was only looking for a live-in specifically for child care I have also provided her written notice and I'm covering myself legally not the jerk you need to get a lawyer to draft an official moveout document with a 30-day date her parents are going to tell her to just stay and call your bluff because family don't let her do you over like this op we have a lease agreement which ends every 6 months for this reason I knew there was a chance she may change her mind about living here so legally I'm protected and can choose to simply not renew the lease not the jerk she fully knows she moved into a room that was intended for a nanny as she fulfilled that role for 2 years it's unfair for her to now demand a change to the arrangement especially since this would be at a heavy cost to you they're also an adult who's been and paid a nice hourly rate between 3:00 p.m. and 12:00 a.m. without any rent being charged what were they doing with that money after 2 years they could have something set aside tuition isn't cheap but wow have they squandered a great opportunity if they can't be ready to move out in 3 months well who do you think is the jerk op or nice please let us know n was making about $200 every time she watched the kids and she had free lodging she should be kissing the ground op walks on after all that's been done for her friend invites me to stay with her for a week then gave me a list of the things that I needed to pay for okay I get helping to pay for some things when you're staying with someone but I was just blown away when she gave me this rundown list for things we did she was my best friend I had known her since I was eight and we're now 50 sure we've Grown Apart since then because now she lives in another country and I rarely see her but she kept begging us to come and visit her and her husband they' put us up for our entire state day and even offered to throw my husband a 50th birthday party because we'd be there during his birthday quite honestly if I invited someone to stay with me there's no way I would be asking for any money from them I can't imagine doing that I was going to give her some money for things like the room they paid for when we went to another city and stayed over but there were other things that I was like wow really but she didn't simply ask for some money she actually gave me an itemized list of what I owed her half of everything we did my best friend and she listed things down to the dime of what we owed her here's the list $152 for the stay at the hotel room in the other City okay this I get $15 for gas for them driving us around town and out of town during our stay to show us the sites $90 birthday food for husband's birthday party this I get as well but if you offer to throw a party for someone you don't usually expect them to pay for half of it $136 for car rental when we flew to another island with them for a couple of days I get this as well $21 for gas I guess for around town driving $6.50 for parking $27 for airport parking when we park the car at the airport before taking a flight to the other Island for 2 days the total $537 180 I was just blown away by this I would have given them a couple hundred to cover the hotel room and birthday food but actually asking us to pay for the gas to drive us around and parking is ridiculous especially the measley 650 and the fact that it wasn't just $500 but $537 180 they asked us to come visit and then unbeknownst to us the whole time they were tallying up all the things we did to split the cost of everything they came and stayed with us a few years earlier and I certainly didn't give them a tally of the groceries they owed or the gas spent driving them around you ask someone to stay with you then you pay for things there are two ways I would handle this both ways are a relationship Ender one pay the money and let them know that no further contact will be had I would be upfront that this was just a crappy thing to do after the fact or two let them know that if they expected money that should have been said before you stayed so you could see if you wanted to stay with them or do the things they wanted to they basically didn't give you the option to say if it was in your budget or not with friends like this who needs enemies am I the jerk for saying my in-laws treat me like a livein maid and wanting to move out i 26 female and my husband who's 27 live with his parents his father had some health issues and needed some care and we agreed to move in to help out father-in-law is generally doing better now but there's still a few things they can't do anymore that my husband does now instead we've discussed moving out I want to but my in-laws are very resistant to the idea stating that there's plenty of room here and they don't know what they do without us Etc while we don't pay his parents to live here their decision we pay for groceries for everyone and several household bills electricity Internet TV Packages Etc the house is mortgage free I also do all of the household cleaning and cooking I arrange and take all of their pets to the vet appointments too I do work from home so this is easier for me and as I'm able to be flexible we also pay half of any house modifications or upgrades as it'll be our house one day recently I've begun to feel resentful of the fact that once they're all done with work they can come home and relax whereas when I finish work I have to cook and clean and I have no help on the weekends I spend half of the day cleaning the house while they do what they want this all came to a head last week I was really unwell I felt the worst I've ever felt and wanted nothing more than a sleep however once it got around to dinner time I was woken up by my mother-in-law to ask when I was getting up to make dinner I didn't want to cause an argument so I just got up and made dinner for them but as I was in the kitchen struggling not to pass out the three of them sat watching a movie waiting for me to bring in their food I didn't say anything at first I waited until my husband and I were alone to bring up my concerns with a lack of help my husband apologized and offered to help more which I accepted but the next day was an exact repeat I had to drag myself out of bed to cook and once I brought in their food my mother-in-law says oh you look truly awful poor you oh by the way later would you mind giving everywhere an extra clean I don't want to get whatever you have at which point I accused them of treating me like a live-in maid and not caring about me outside of the services I provide for them I pointed out that I wouldn't be in the communal areas if I hadn't been dragged out to cook and that they could have handled one meal themselves my husband sat there in silence he thinks I should have brought it up more carefully at a time when I wasn't so emotional I agree that I probably should have but I was sick and stressed I want to move out but husband and in-laws are still against it nothing has changed with what they expect from me I got no apology just silent treatment from mother-in-law for a couple of days so am I the jerk edit it didn't start off with me doing everything before we moved in with my in-laws my husband and I split everything equally and that worked great once we moved here I picked up a bunch of the household chores because I work from home and I'm here it just made sense slowly over time there's just been things added here and there and that is snowballs into the current situation I had have stood up for myself a few times but it's an incredibly difficult situation I'm very aware this is not my house they're not my parents and the things I would say to my own parents are not the same I feel I could say to his I moved across the country before we got married none of my friends are here most of my closest friends are my husband's friends wives Etc I don't have any family nearby I've always felt if I push too hard everyone will be against me and I didn't realize before now how toxic of an environment it is the inheritance of the house isn't something I want or need this was never supposed to be a long-term thing and I guess I've just felt pressured to contribute to certain things involving the house because we do live here and my husband will get the house one day he's an only child overall it's just been very eye openening to realize maybe I'm not being as silly as I'm often made to think all the things spiral into one big mess and my husband should be sticking up for me not contributing to the problem I've tried talking to him about things several times and he'll be helpful for a couple of days before resorting back to Mommy's little prince I know I've been needing to get out for a while I think this is just the push I needed to make such a massive life decision what exactly is it that your husband does that your father-in-law can't do at this point I'd say he's recovered enough that he should be able to do most things but it's mostly walking his dogs anything involving any sort of lifting nothing that couldn't be done by outside sources if we were to leave update after making this post I started putting my wages into my own bank account I removed all of my savings from our joint savings account and transferred everything from my own safety account just in case this turned out to be the best decision because I found out I was pregnant roughly 2 weeks after this post I'd been told at 15 that due to some medical conditions I'd never be able to get pregnant naturally so it was a complete shock once I had a scan to check everything was okay thankfully it was we told my in-laws and this is what gave me the final shove I needed immediately names were being thrown around and my mother-in-law started talking about reducing her hours to part-time and early retirement so she could be around to raise the baby this rubbed me completely the wrong way I don't want anyone else raising my baby colors for the nursery and themes Etc were all being discussed constantly but never with me or my opinions being taken into consideration and within a week I felt as though I was just an incubator the final straw happened when myself my husband's cousin who's 29 female and mother-in-law went shopping I had been looking at the different kinds of pumps that I wanted before being being told that I would be bottle feeding so everyone could help out I didn't want to cause a scene in the middle of the shop so I moved on to outfits but everything I picked up or looked at was either the wrong color or style or something I picked out one outfit which would be my first baby purchase and mother-in-law snatched it out of my hands before I could pay telling me that it was the wrong sort of outfit it wasn't gender neutral enough and if the baby is a boy like we're hoping then it's far too feminine I didn't need to be told what I could and couldn't dress my own kid in nor did I appreciate the suggestions that they would all prefer a boy let alone being told how I would be feeding them so I left I tried talking to my husband on three separate occasions and he either made excuses or blew me off entirely I couldn't handle it anymore I packed my bags and went to stay with my sister for a week my husband called once and asked me to go home once I made it clear I wouldn't be returning to live in that house that I would raise the baby on my own if he didn't want to leave but I would not allow my my kid to be raised in such a toxic environment as a big surprise to no one he stayed put after that I got spammed with texts in the family group chat but I left and deleted them all I started the divorce process and hopefully as I've saved every disgusting message from either my ex or his family about both myself and my baby they won't get any form of custody although since I announced the gender they've all gone quite silent I now have a small three-bedroom house I'm only renting for now while I wait for the forced to finalize but it's plenty big enough for the two of us my daughter will grow up surrounded by my family and plenty of cousins to play with the house is pretty bare at the minute as I only got the keys a couple of days ago but I have time before she gets here to make sure everything is ready neighbors are excluding us from events after we cut down a dangerous tree a little less than a year ago the city finally removed a tree in front of our neighbor's house after years of us requesting they do so dangerous lean towards our home lifting the the sidewalk it was a hazard the issue is that our neighbors who we previously had a great relationship with now hate us I mean hate us they are also the most active house in the neighborhood they host lots of barbecues dinners holiday events Etc none of which we've been invited to since the tree came down this sucks for us but much more so for our 7-year-old daughter who used to play with their daughter all the time and still does at school and who has been very sad to miss out we ran into them on a walk recently and our daughter asked if their backyard pumpkin carving was happening soon neighbor wife told her she wasn't sure which is a lie I saw them unload a ton of pumpkins from their car the other day and one that our daughter will certainly find out about since we can see directly into their backyard from ours my wife and I went over yesterday and tried to talk it out we said that we're sorry the tree had to go but it was for the safety of our family and property and we'd like to find a way to be cordial again for the kids we offered to pick out a new tree with them and planted which would be a safe way to fill the space make a cool memory and could be a nice restart as a tree planted during our kids' childhoods they declined and basically told us that we're welcome to do whatever we want but that they don't care to be a part of it and that they're sad to have said goodbye to our daughter but that they are not interested in a relationship with us so we should not expect to be invited to anything they host my wife cried all night and doesn't know how to explain to our daughter and eventually to our son when he's old enough that all the other kids in the neighborhood get to participate while they don't I'm wondering if I should try one more conversation and if so how can I go about it or if we should just accept being excluded any advice is welcome what's stopping you guys from being active in the neighborhood this was my thought with the neighbors in question the relationship is beyond repair they've made that clear but for the sake of the kids you guys should try hosting perhaps the other neighbors won't feel as strongly about cutting you out of their lives and you will have an opportunity to rekindle some friendships may I also suggest to still invite the other neighbors even though they surely will decline it just might be seen by others as caddy or Petty or competitive if you don't and people might feel compelled to take sides if they haven't already I have a giant Maple in a similar situation in front of my house I would be devastated if it was gone it Shades a substantial part of my yard and adds privacy as well op the relationships with our other neighbors are still pretty fine most must have stayed out of it understandably my wife has spoken with another of her close friends on our street who said that she sees both sides feels bad for us but also understands why they're upset about the tree which seems like the general neighborhood consensus we've had a few smaller G togethers with one to two other families but maybe we'll try something bigger and invite everyone including them as an olive branch thank you my new neighbor is spying on me with her ring doorbell I've been living in my apartment complex for 2 years now and it's been wonderful recently a young woman moved in across from my apartment we met each other briefly and apart from the noise made when she was having movers bring in her things she's been very quiet and polite however there's one thing that bothers me she has a ring doorbell on her door recently I saw her leaving and I asked her why she had it and that I was worried that she could see me in my apartment she said she had it for packages and due to no pee holes on the door and just for extra security she showed me that yes it can see my door a bit but assured me that she's not on her phone all day checking it I expressed my discomfort with this and I asked her to remove it she told me she was sorry I was uncomfortable but she was not spying on me and she had a right to have it up she wasn't breaking her lease and she had seen other people in the complex have one I told her I don't care about the other people I want it gone or I will be reporting her she told me not to bother and called a property manager regarding it because I got a visit from her asking me to leave her in the doorbell situation alone am I really out of line for this you're the jerk just think of it as extra security that you don't have to pay for I guarantee if something happens at your doorstep the first thing you'll do is go to her for the footage well who do you think is the jerk op or their neighbor please let us know Reddit boy and I don't have one camera up outside we have nine you could never be too safe these days sorry you said you were allergic another restaurant story from a few years ago I cook or wait tables depending on how long it takes me to get fed up with one or the other and I need a change we always have to be very careful when it comes to allergies in food service because it can result in life or death for some people with shellfish allergies nut allergies celiacs Etc enter the gluten-free Trend crowd while I recognize some people have a legit allergy there are so many that are trying to be trendy the big difference is that a person with a true allergy has an already general idea of what they can and cannot have and we'll start the whole process off before ordering by letting you know what said allergy is which we appreciate as it saves time no big deal the trendy glutenfree peeps need to tell you three times throughout their order and then always end up backtracking after they find out that basically everything they desire to order either contains gluten or is potentially cross-contaminated I was waiting this time around and I started getting tired of hearing about it we had a particular almost daily r regular who would tell us every time about her gluten intolerance tell all the people sitting near her about it then proceed to order items that had gluten I was having a bad day she comes in does her normal spiel about being allergic to gluten I say yep wasn't sufficient enough attention for her she emphasizes what it does to her delicate system because she's allergic she orders the usual food cooked and prepared in the fryer which have had gluten ridden fried food in them all day I'm thoroughly annoyed now having to listen to her graphic detail about her gut and the effects from gluten I as usual inform her the friers are cooked in with items containing gluten as she says the normal oh that's fine I have an evil idea pop into my head ma'am you just said you're allergic to gluten I cannot in good conscience put this restaurant or my job at risk by serving you food that you will have an allergic reaction to I'm sorry but you're going to have to pick another item she's shocked start backtracking I stand firm no I'm sorry but I just can't do it if you get sick from the food because I was careless about your allergy then I could lose my job these are the items you can choose from today calls manager over manager backs me up after hearing the story manager was tired of her too lady indignantly orders one of the items I listed to save face obviously no tip but I don't really care it was still worth it still came back 2 Days Later miraculously cured of her gluten allergy I refus service to a guest who used cancer as an excuse to be rude location nights in and sleeps somewhere in Washington state I'm working the morning shift and it's already busy as soon as I clock in at 7:00 a.m. 5 minutes later I get a call from a guest in room 303 upon answering the guest explains that he wants to book a night in the same room and that he's going to be making a new reservation through a third party right now okay I check our availability real quick and I find that there's no available rooms for his room type a single queen however there are two more double Queen rooms available as I was explaining the issue to him as I was about to go through possible workarounds he interrupted me so you're saying I have to leave at 11:00 a.m. and I have to wait until 3:00 p.m. to get back into this very same room he said I'm still thinking about where the Muse communication occurred where he assumed that would be the case I didn't even mention departure times in the conversation his tone of voice was a blend of angry and entitled belittling towards me the kind that sends you shaking makes you think you got into trouble I say no that's not what's going to happen let me explain and the guest tells me the same thing repeats his phrase sir I have to leave at 11 just to get into the same room later I'm paying for this new reservation right now he said same tone but louder he's just angry with pretty much his sold out night I'm tired of his Antics already and I've decided to pull the plug on on him seeing as how he was making me emotional at this point yes you'll leave at 11: just like you said I stayed and I hung up the phone I didn't find his new reservation yet a few minutes later he calls the desk again can I get transfer to customer service he asks I'm just here at the front desk you're going to have to call the guest interrupts me he kept repeating the question again getting angrier and angrier before I could even answer can you transfer me to customer service can you transfer me to customer service can you transfer me and then he hangs up on the conversation himself at this point this man is going absolutely Looney definitely not good for the hotel I figure I've already told him he checks out at 11:00 a.m. and I'll just make my notes about it in the meantime about 20 minutes later I get a call from our hotel customer support line they reference the problem guest and ask me why I'm making him check out at 11:00 a.m. and then back in at 3:00 p.m. keep in mind the problem guest booked through a third party no clue why he called the hotel's direct service desk so I explained myself I tell the agent we're sold out tonight and the guest was making Grand assumptions that I have no control over I reiterate that the guest is checking out at 11:00 but I am now refusing service to him due to his behavior the customer service agent says that they understand and that they'll explain this to the guest we hang up amicably meanwhile I find that the problem guest did indeed make a reservation an already paid for double Queen room from the third party that definitely wasn't in his room type not good I already refuse service to the guest so I'll have to call him I do so when he answers I tell him that I found his double Queen reservation and before I can tell him that I'm refusing service to him he interrupted me again yeah I booked that reservation but I'll be staying in this room and buzz off he said the phone clicked on my end oh boy well it was about 9:00 a.m. at this point the problem guests certainly had their room until 11:00 but afterwards I was getting him off property and then dard do not rent so I waited and I didn't have to wait long the same guest comes down from his room his hair was unkempt and he was a tall and lanky looking 30-year-old man and he had the gall to ask me for a breakfast bag he even introduced himself by the way I'm the guy from room 303 and I won't be leaving the room I'm just here to get my breakfast bag he said I stifled a laugh oh okay I'm not getting you a breakfast bag I'm refusing to service you sir I said the problem guest just scoffed at me repeated what I said under his breath and then left without saying anything else I was honestly surprised that he just left it at that I thought that was probably the end of it at least I officially told him my intentions with him that wasn't the end of it I get another call from our hotel customer service asking why I wasn't giving this problem guest his breakfast bag I told them pretty much the same thing though I definitely added in the fact that the guest told me to buzz off and was harassing me with these calls and as a result I'm refusing service to him the agent understood but asked if there was anything we could do to resolve the conflict I told them that I was willing to cancel and refund the problem guest reservation if he contacts the third party about it we hung up amicably at this point I bet I was on this dude's mind after that I didn't buzz off and let him keep his room on a soldout night I'm proven right because about 30 minutes later he's at the front desk blanky arms practically hugging the counter like an orangutang in a defensive posture hello Mr problem guest I say can we start over he asks I mull it over but if he wants to Parlay he asked to hear how he affected me first I look him in the eyes and I tell him Point Blank I didn't appreciate your behavior towards me one bit this morning I say and then he starts saying things I'm sorry if I was a little bit rude but you were being just as bad did you know that I found out I contracted cancer yesterday and then you do this to me refusing service and breakfast he says oh so he's gaslighting me I determine that he doesn't want a parlay so I reply you think that having cancer gives you the right to behave like you are towards me I ask the problem guest begin strafing as he's ranting at me I haven't done anything rude towards you at all he stated I checked the lobby and it's empty besides us you told me to buzz off I reply I make sure to emphasize his words he buls in mutters before saying clearly yeah I did but I'm just trying to stay here a bit longer because I have cancer would you really kick out a person for Contracting coner goodness this guy was putting me on the spot oh well consistency is key yes I'm refusing service to you specifically for your behavior we don't have any rooms for you anymore I say I'm going to be on the street because of you he yells I switched the conversation slightly don't worry about that Mr problem guest I have no problems in canceling your reservation you just made however you have to contact the third party you paid and tell them about this situation so you can be refunded I say but it's a non-refundable reservation I won't get my money back he says oh trust me you will as long as you contact the third party and have them contact me you will I say with that he went back to his room the problem guest bothered me no more I got a call from his third party and got the idiot his refund he he left the room in good condition and I think he left at the side entrance because I never saw him again he started with a bang and ended with a whimper for my own work life it's not worth arguing and plating people like this guy especially on a night that I know his room will be sold soon anyway the thing is he probably would have gotten his wish if he wasn't so mean I would have just switched one of our pending single queen room reservations into a double room so Mr problem guest could stay in the same room but no he had to assume that he was done for from the get-go and try to make me feel bad about the specific circumstances of doing my job because he had cancer I guess my girlfriend refuses to dress nice for our date night so we had decided to go out on the weekend and I suggested going somewhere fancy she says okay and I find an upscale Chinese restaurant and show it to her she says cool and we agree to spend the evening there fast forward to the evening I see her dressed in a T-shirt and worn down jeans I asked her why she's not wearing a dress and she just replies she doesn't feel like it I'm like uh okay but I told you it's a fancy place and she's like uh it's just a Chinese restaurant I pull up the Instagram and I try to show her their feed to convince her that it's upscale but she doesn't even want to look at it I again ask her to dress nicely and this time she's upset and she says we're not going anywhere tonight we haven't talked since then and it's been a day now she usually likes to dress up even when we go to a normal bar this is leaving me confused am I the jerk here edit I just want to make a few things clear the place had a dress code smart elegant so not really dressy and not too casual either I wasn't asking her to specifically wear a dress but just to dress a little bit better we live together and I know her wardrobe and a dress is usually what she prefers to wear when she dresses up I looked at a few posts and stories on their page and in most of them the women seemed to be dressed up a bit I did not want her to feel uncomfortable when we got there as she's pretty self-conscious edit two people keep asking me what I wore I wasn't dressed yet I usually wait until she's done but anyway I was planning to wear a polo shirt and a pair of chinos to people saying Chinos in a polo is not dressed up this is in Dubai and the weather is insanely hot especially during the summer wearing a suit is not an option and when you do you look out of place hard for us to tell considering we don't know just how fancy the place is there are places where people tend to dress fancy but it's no big deal if you don't And Then There Are Places where if you don't you stand out like a sore thumb depending on that either side could be right not the jerk dressing up for a restaurant or an event is just basic adulting you gave her a heads up in advance regarding how fancy this place was you mentioned she has dressed up in the past so she has no trouble doing it I think the real problem here has yet to be articulated by her I hope you find out what the real issue is and you can work it out update us if possible and good luck you're the jerk you seem to have conflated smart clothing with a dress why did it need to be a dress there are plenty of smart clothes women can wear that are not dresses she isn't a jerk for looking at pictures of the restaurant and determining that in her view she was dressed appropriately you aren't a jerk for having a different view but the whole why aren't you wearing a dress thing yep I can see why that irritated her edit to ad personally I'm not wearing a dress to hang out with a dude in Chinos in a polo shirt but that just me Karen demands I cut her extremely long hair I'm a hair stylist I had a woman book her daughter in for a trim and color with me I'm not their usual stylist The Stylist they usually go to is on holiday and I was recommended to them by a friend when the mom booked the trim and color in she specified that her daughter had really long hair and asked if that was okay for me to handle the receptionist said yes because I have a lot of clients with waistlength hair waist length is usually the longest hair I'll cut I've never had a client with hair longer than this due to issues with my knee I can't kneel down for long I'm awaiting surgery when they turned up for the appointment the daughter had her hair up in a bun so I couldn't see the full length of her hair the mom thanked me for being able to get her daughter in she said that when their usual stylist isn't available it can be difficult to get her daughter an appointment due to her hair length when the daughter sat in my chair I asked her to take her hair down so that I could brush through it before we started her color when she took her hair down I noticed it was much longer than I expected I asked her how long her hair was and she said it was knee length she brushed her hair back so it was all going down the back of the chair and it was well past the length I was comfortable cutting at I would have had to kneel down to do it I waved the mum over as I told the daughter I couldn't do it I apologized to the mom and told her that I would not be able to cut her daughter's hair due to its length I explained that it was too long for me to cut it as I couldn't kneel down to cut it understandably the mum was upset that I was refusing to cut her daughter's hair she demanded the booking fee back I informed her that the 50b booking fee was non-refundable and she would have been told this at the time of booking she then demanded to speak to the manager of the salon I told her that I would get her the owner the owner of the salon did refund her the money she told me that I shouldn't have taken the booking if I couldn't cut hair that long I told her that the length had never been specified to me the receptionist was just told that it was long and long hair in our area as you usually no longer than waist length she knows I can't kneel without being in pain the mom has since been writing on the Facebook page of the salon complaining that I refuse to cut her daughter's hair because I can't actually cut long hair I feel bad that Mom is upset about this but at the same time it was never specified how long her daughter's hair actually was am I the jerk for refusing to cut extremely long hair not the jerk for not cutting the hair but you are the jerk for no refund I would be pretty mad about that you're the jerk for saying the booking fee was non-refundable the issue certainly wasn't the client's fault so in no circumstance should they be out $50 sof you're the jerk seems like there was miscommunication here mom thought she had communicated everything she needed to she didn't have any way of knowing that there's a length which you can't cut because of your knee issues where you fall into jerk territory is how you responded to her when she asked for the refund am I the jerk for refusing to let my mother-in-law stay with us because she's upper class I'm 29 female my husband who's 30 grew up with a family with similar amounts of money as mine but I grew up solidly blue collar in middle class my dad was a boat repair man with all my uncles while my husband grew up more in a white collar World playing piano sailing owning horses Etc we had a vacation home in a small Beach town where we spent our whole Summers while my husband's family spent 2 weeks each summer in the Hamptons our families just spent their money differently we're all still about the same bracket but act differently my husband's family occasionally visits us since we own a home with a guest room they're nice but very different for example their homes are Immaculate nothing ever out of place they move very deliberately with everything they do I'm not dirty at all but I will sometimes leave out books I'm reading for a few days or have more clutter they don't swear ever I will if the situation warrants it but never like at someone more when telling a story they're just a bit more uptight which makes it hard for me to be totally authentic with them they also judge me when I'm not the same as them for example they show up unannounced to drop in I'm like sorry it's a little messy we didn't know you were coming they look around and say yeah I can see that or when they met my parents and my dad dropped a few no no words at my parents house and he had a few beers in him they were shocked and clearly uncomfortable some dirt gets on the floor from someone's boots and I don't pick it up right away someone is pointing it out to me instead of just waiting 5 minutes until until I finish what I'm doing even cooking is different my family is from Spain so we make in my opinion amazing food and we go all out and we don't worry about cleaning until after they make very safe meals like pasta very carefully and never let a single thing drip out of the saucepan everything is moderated my mother-in-law recently asked if she could stay with us for a month I like my mother-in-law and I don't mind her staying with us occasionally but I always need to do a deep clean be super careful of any messes while she's here speak in lower tones and never swear it's like I can only show so much of myself and always need to be careful I can't do that for a month I told my husband no and he got upset he said I'm more open with my family and I should open up to his family I told him I can't because they say they want to be close but then judge me every time I do something less classy than them or act different he told me I need to just ignore them and be myself and allow them to come over I refused us he's angry and now we're at a stalemate am I the jerk edit our beach house was Tiny with one bedroom and a three season porch for the kids and we shared it with all of our cousins and aunt and uncle we also rented it out during the offseason we did not grow up learning how to ski we went to public school and did not travel much my husband traveled the world went to Aspen and hung out with people much richer than him as a kid his parents did everything they could to maintain that lifestyle including working with multiple jobs renting vacation homes and desirable locations for a week instead of buying Etc we came from similar money brackets but his parents really wanted the upper class lifestyle while mine wanted to stay more blue collar in nature my parents both came from serious poverty but did well with his business that he started when I was a kid I was unaware that there could be these subtle class differences until I met his family my husband's long-term ex was super super wealthy so that doesn't help I never claim not to be privileged I I'm so grateful to have grown up in my situation and have amazing childhood memories whether you want to call this a lifestyle or class difference there's a clear difference between his family's expectations and mine I see this as a good way for them to decide if they really want a closer relationship let them come and be yourself she doesn't like the mud of the boots tracked in there's a broom wants to clean the kitchen before eating we'll be eating has a judgy look on her face ask if there's a problem she'll either start relaxing or she won't either way you get to keep living your best life and please invite me to dinner when I'm in the area no jerks here not The Jerk by the way it's not classy to drop by unannounced there are cultured upper class ways maybe only so much pretense go ahead swear drop things on the floor just be yourself in your own home either they'll get comfortable or they can leave you're the jerk I can see why your husband is angry your family lives near you and are over all the time but you can't host his mom at all like if a month is too much just shorten the visit how would you feel if your husband told you that your family is not welcome in your home at all if he insinuated they were nuisances to him personally and he can't be bothered to be around them wouldn't you be angry also as advice you might want to start dealing with your insecurities they seem to be coloring just about all interactions with your in-laws most of the things you mentioned have nothing to do with class being tidy and not swearing is not a crime they might have different bearings but they are your husband's parents and your in-laws they're not forcing their upbringing on you from what you wrote try being yourself a bit more around them and next time they point something out to you ask them for help keep a book out on the table who cares don't keep a facade around them 24/7 how can you expect them to like and bond with you if you in fact never show them yourself am I the jerk for wanting my roommate to replace my special wine that her friend opened I I 23 female share an apartment with two roommates 28 female and 25 female my 28 female roommate Morgan sometimes has friends over and they'll watch movies and drink something usually wine I don't really drink just once or twice a year on special occasions the most recent time was because my sister wanted to do a wine tasting while we were on a trip together I found the first wine that I've actually enthusiastically liked a spicy wine infused with hot peppers I bought a bottle took it home and put it in my section of the shared Pantry a couple of months went by without incident then one Friday night I came home to Morgan and two of her friends drinking it I confronted her about it and she said that her friend had opened it without knowing it was mine Morgan apparently realized the mistake but thought it would be okay because I've said that I don't like wine before what makes you think that made it okay I've said that before yes but this is literally the only wine I've ever enjoyed enough to buy a bottle of I was saving it for a special occasion or maybe to share the next time my sister came to visit but they drank most of it and now there's barely a glass left I told her I wanted her to replace it and she agreed well a couple weeks later she said that she had gotten me another bottle but it was just regular wine from the store I told her that she must have misunderstood I don't want just any old bottle of regular wine I want her to get me another bottle of the actual wine that she and her friends drank her eyes got really wide and she started complaining about how that Winery is a 3-hour drive away and that wasn't fair because it was her friend who opened it and not her honestly I told her that I didn't really care Morgan knew it was mine and let her friends drink it anyway she could have told her friend that it was mine put it away and told me about it and I would have understood but no she let them go ahead and even poured herself a glass she was still drinking it when I came home so yeah I've told her that her friend can replace it or she can don't really care how I just want another bottle before the lease is up next year and and I move out Morgan is mad at me she's been avoiding hanging out in our shared living room and won't speak to me at all now our third roommate thinks I'm being unreasonable and wants me to just drop it and accept the regular wine bottle as a replacement so Morgan will get back to her old self they're both making me feel really bad now and I'm wondering if I'm being too harsh so am I the jerk not the jerk she needs to keep her myths off of other people's food and drink not the jerk I don't believe her friend took it by mistake do you let your friends rummage through your cabinets to find whatever they want either way room needs to replace with the exact same thing it doesn't matter how she gets it or how inconveniencing it is this is the consequence of not respecting boundaries the box of skulls in my free time I like to draw one subject of interest is skulls usually I have to search the web for images of them but I know a biologist so I called them up and asked if I could borrow a cast not a real skull they said that they never loan out a skull because they will forget who they loaned it out to and it just disappears online they go for $300 to $2,000 she had the ones that are not open above the eyes so you can see into the brain cavity that are obviously for study they looked more real as they were cast from real skulls and thus have some of the character in damage of The Originals I think they're rather sturdy plastic with a little heft they are all two pieces with a detached mandible in addition to human skull she had other mammals including apes and monkeys that have fangs strangely she said she would be willing to loan out all of the skulls and that way they will not forget who has what I agreed and grinning I took a huge box of them home my wife saw the box and asked me what was in it I said skulls she said no really what's in the box she didn't believe me I can imagine bringing a big box of Legos a colleague's family was passing on or something like that and upon being asked saying skulls or some other random improbable item just to be funny because whoever would have expected a box of skulls I said it again she got mad and said fine don't tell me now at this point I've had my fun she was indeed surprised by my answer and I could have filled in the details of how and why I got the skulls and when I had to return them but I was told not to tell her so I did that I complied stubbornly and with perhaps a bit of malice because of her extreme reaction surprising me I froze up and became defensive when I'm surprised because of my childhood she grew up with older brothers and they were always teasing her growing up you can be sure her orange juice had gummy worms in it she has a short fuse for Foolery on the other hand I was the oldest with a Stern and overly firm stepmother and I learned to do as I was told to the letter lest I face the consequences which go beyond the scope of this post I put on stubbornness just as she wanted an explanation she asked again and I said that I had answered the questions and besides I had just been told to not say anything else I think we were both a bit steamed she didn't get an explanation because I stuck by her command to not say anything she pondered for a while and I didn't see when she slipped to another part of the house to get closer to the box when she was near it she bounced on it and opened it up I didn't even see her without context or explanation she got an eye full of scale siiz skulls I saw her talking to herself he said skulls these are skulls a box full of skulls it was kind of a moment of shock they were not neatly stacked just jumbled mandibles and craniums of course this was not what I had imagined when I came home with this box I rather wanted the enthusiasm and wonder that I had well it was boted but I explained the details after she had found that I had not been sarcastic we recovered gradually and it all kind of played out again when the kids came home from school here's what happened with them they were surprised by the box of skulls too my daughter had scheduled a scary movie night with friends my son buried a monkey skull smaller and veggie sticks the salty ones that looked like french fries my wife was like oh no you don't we don't do that here during the film one of the girls pulled out a monkey mandible with fangs it was dark but a surprise to everyone much screaming turns out my wife only removed the cranium the mandible was still in there buried in the veggie sticks no one knew it turned into a sleepover fine they were up later than me I had to work so I got up no shower no nothing just get out of the house on the way out I noticed that they arranged all of the skulls in a row perfectly pairing each Cranium with its mandible that's a difficult task as I get a handful of cereal to munch on the way out the door I'm inspired I put an o o in each eye socket I'm out to work I heard later that they thought no one had been downstairs before them and they were certainly last to bed so they could not explain the Cal in the eyes sockets it was terrifying much screaming when Halloween came around one of them dressed as an Odio don't remind you about your passport renewal cool this happened a few years ago when my now husband and I first started dating we were going on holiday in May in order to attend his friend's destination wedding I don't mind his friends but for the purpose of this story I have to say they are more his friends than mine he needed his passport renewed which needs to be done every 10 years here in the UK knowing that we had this trip coming up and that his passport needed renewing I reminded him back in I think February that it was a job that he needed to do I think the third time I reminded him about it possibly sometime in April he slightly snapped at me or was at least a little off and basically said you don't need to keep reminding me I'll sort it out fine even though this was still early in the relationship I had already noticed that my boyfriend as he then was was wonderful in many ways but he is a bit of a procrastinate Ator and especially has a tendency to put off boring admin type jobs such as this I can't say I blame him but I'm the sort of person who gets things like that done as soon as I notice them because otherwise they'll be on my mind but he was absolutely right this was a trip to see his friends my passport didn't need updating it really wasn't my job to remind him about his or chase him about it I didn't especially care what happened either way the trip was extremely cheap and the travel insurance might have even covered cancelling it malicious compliance activated well wouldn't you know it something like 5 days before we were due to leave he sheepishly comes to me and says he still hasn't done anything about his passport I don't know what it's like elsewhere but I think standard lead times for passports here are at least a few weeks so he ends up doing a priority request or whatever it's called where they fast track your application I think from memory the basic application is79 lb and then priority on top was another 150 lb and possibly more for fast shipping I think the whole thing ended up costing him around 250 lb with everything in together when it should have been 79 lb my memory is blurry but I think he also had to get a new passport photo taken and authenticated quickly too which I seem to remember was really stressful and rust for him as well we did get to go on the trip as everything came through the day before we left he apologized for having snapped at me and for asking me not to remind him about it but by that point I wasn't even angry and honestly I felt bad for how much stress and expenses he had gone through he's improved how he does his boring life admin since then am I the jerk for telling my sister that I don't care about how her wedding turns out I'm 29 male my sister who's 26 has always been incredibly spoiled it's always her way or the highway so I knew that when she got engaged she would be a handful her wedding is coming up in about a year and she's already started planning she set us all down my mother father and and my other sister and told us what they had decided for the theme now personally I think it's a little tacky to put a theme on the wedding but it's not my wedding so I held my tongue her theme was nature and this was applied to everything she wanted a floral lace dress succulents as favors and the ceremony to take place in a greenhouse again tacky but not my wedding so I didn't say anything the issue arose when it came time to talk about the reception venue she said that she wanted it to be outdoors in one of those huge event tents with windows so that we could be in nature my whole family hated the idea an outdoor reception just seems very cheap and not at all classy we suggested that she go with something a little more classic like an event venue but she had her mindset I got really upset because the entire family was telling her that they would prefer one thing and she was insisting she'd do another when she was literally the only person who wanted it at first I tried to go easy on her by telling her that the themed weddings are are just a fad and if she commits to her theme so heavily she'll look back on it in 20 years and cringe and that it's better to choose something Timeless like a simple dress in a hotel Ballroom I said she could definitely incorporate flowers into the centerpieces and decorations if she wanted but to have the whole wedding centered around plants and flowers just seemed like too much never wanted to take advice my sister just said that she's sorry we feel that way but her and her fiance have wanted this for their wedding for years and they've spent a lot of time coming up with the details together and they wanted their wedding to reflect their personalities and who they are as a couple and she didn't think my Timeless suggestions would be able to do that here's where I might be the jerk I kind of let my frustration get the better of me and said fine I don't care if your wedding turns out to be tacky I knew you were going to be an inflexible brid zil anyway I do think that she was being too rigid and just thinking about what she would like instead of what her family and guests would prefer but my parents say that it's my sister's w wedding and that it wasn't cool to say that I didn't care am I the jerk you're the jerk one there's nothing wrong with her theme two it's not your wedding so your preferences are irrelevant three one person's tacky is another person's treasure four there is nothing Timeless about your basic suggestions yeah you're the jerk you sound a bit spoiled as well it's her wedding she has the right to do what she wants you and your family can suggest but getting upset when she goes on her own direction is selfish neighbors tell me to stop using my hammer because they have a new baby my neighbor just rang my doorbell to tell me his wife said to stop hammering I was dumbfounded I just kind of stared and said excuse me and he informed me that we would be unable to make any sort of noise for the next few months because of their new baby to which I laughed in his face and closed the door and now his wife is screaming at my door and he's messaging me to please just do what his wife says so some background my spouse bought this house in 2011 both houses are single family detached homes both lots are one in a half size Lots so there's roughly 33 ft between our houses compared to the 6 ft for the rest of the street neighbor husband was already in his house I moved in 8 years ago shortly after saw the neighbor for the first time and it was someone I've known since I was 4 years old we went to school all the way through high school together we're now 40 years old 3 years ago he met a woman she had at the time a 2-year-old daughter she would stay at his house and I would constantly find the kid wandering the streets they would just send her outside with no supervision no toys no fenced yard and expect her to entertain herself the kid was and still is nothing but a brad 2 years ago she moved in with him and brought her daughter with her I run a daycare so my yard is full of fun toys but we also have three other fenced off areas one for our pool in the summer one for our our dogs and one for our hot tub all these have separate fences and self-closing Gates plus my external fence is 6 ft tall during 2020 when lockdown hit the kids were doing virtual schooling from home she never actually did it she would be ringing my doorbell in the middle of the day asking me to open my yard for her to play I would explain that she can't be here when I have daycare kids and my daughter will come out to play after supper she went to their backyard dragged patio furniture to my fence and climbed over it who knows how long she was actually out there but she decided she was done and then couldn't get out the latch for my main gate is at the very top so that the kids can't open it when my back is turned she started screaming so I ran out in a panic I took her home explained what had happened to her mom and her mom gave me crap for just not allowing her to play I face $100,000 fine if she's caught on my property during daycare hours I explained this she still snapped and called me a jerk I left it at that it happened a handful of more times I started sending them daycare invoices still kept happening I finally told them I would have to call the police next time which I did except this time Mom and Grandpa were both sitting outside on the stairs and watched her do it also never bothered to come help her open the gate when she started screaming police told them to stop or Mom would face charges I now have proximity sensors at the top of my fence and I get a notification if anything goes over my fence it's gotten better as she has gotten older so last summer we set up our above ground pool just ordered a new pump system and heater pool was half filled I had also just done up all my Planters I casually glance at my security cameras and see her by the pool I head out main gate was open as the neighborhood kids were running from yard to yard playing she took it upon herself to go to the pool and take buckets of soil from my Planters and dump it into the pool $400 of d damage to my brand new $1,000 pump and heater system that was up for less than 4 hours I snapped and screamed at her to get out of my yard and to not come back she's not allowed in my yard at all unless me or my spouse is out there now to current time they had a new baby last week and me hammering in my basement as disturbing them in their house 33 ft away and they expect me to wait until the fall to finish my project so I'm currently sitting on my bench outside enjoying a glass of water with my outdoor speaker is playing metal while I mow the lawn which is much louder than the little bit of hammering I was doing I'll finish that tonight after dark edit lots of people are saying to call the police I do call the police when I feel it's necessary we live in a major crime area and they're always busy with that if I call because it's nonviolent and they recognize the address it's at least 24 hours or usually not at all as for the concerns about her wandering the neighborhood I'm in a smaller City my kid has been playing by her herself in the neighborhood with regular check-ins since she was 4 I have no issues with that at 2 and 3 when she was originally doing it was ridiculous as for saying not to let my daughter play with her I cannot take my daughter's entire friend group which is exactly what would happen we are one of three houses in a row with kids house one has three kids house two the problem house has two kids and house three mine has one house 1 and two all go to the same school they're already outside playing by the time my daughter gets home my daughter does activities on Saturday and Sunday mornings so the same thing so not allowing my daughter to play with one kid also takes away four others am I the jerk for leaving a dinner date after he fed his dogs a better meal than us title screams of entitlement but let me explain I started casually dating a guy 2 and 1 half months ago we have gone on several dates such as movies or dinner at restaurants and the arcade at the pier near the ocean it's been a really Pleasant time and I don't want you guys to think I don't appre appreciate this guy because I do but this really rubbed me the wrong way as for who has been paying for the dates we usually split 50/50 he has paid for me once and I've paid for him twice but the rest is split so he knows that I have a gastro reflux disease severe acid reflux that I'm on medication for I can't eat anything that has red sauces barbecue sauce or artificial dyes such as red or Blues yes the medications help but only if I'm sticking to a pretty clean diet I can't even eat hamburger because of the red dyee they use when I eat the things mentioned above I feel like I'm having a heart attack as I said he knows all of this we've talked about it several times so he invites me over to his place and says he wants to make dinner he makes a point to tell me to make sure you have a strong appetite so I didn't eat anything at all since breakfast and I was starving after working all day so I arrive at 6:00 p.m. and I see him making steak eggs potatoes and corn on the cob the small ones that you put in pasta salad it looked and smelled delicious he puts on a movie while we wait so I'm in the living room the entire time he's cooking well he keeps going back and forth between the kitchen and living room and on his last trip back he brings out our plates and much to my surprise it's Pizza I just kind of look at him and ask where the steak and eggs were and he pretty bluntly said that that was for his dogs two German Shepherds and stated that they eat better than he does I reminded him that I couldn't eat Pizza red sauce and he starts arguing that he made sure to not put too much sauce on it and kept telling me to just try it I asked if he had anything else and he said no I told him sorry but I needed to go and I excused myself on the way home I grabbed myself something to eat well he calls me and it sounds like he's having a miltown says he can't believe I made him feel like that and that the pizza was homemade and he made sure not to put too much sauce on it but he knows I can't have it at all and said something about adding sugar to it Etc said I've showed my true colors my friends also think I'm overreacting here and said I'm acting jealous of his dogs am I the jerk no not the jerk this is what casual dating is for he seems to have confused dislike of strong sauce hence the sugar for an actual medical condition but it is odd that he can't seem to understand the simple medical explanation not sure this has anything to do with the dogs it worsens the offense because he had all this food she could have eaten and that he's perfectly capable of prefering but he gave it to someone who can eat other stuff and gave her something cheap and Bland in comparison that she can't even eat the pizza wasn't served due to lack of skills budget or time but is part of a deliberate performance where he invited her to watch him make superior food for someone else not sure what satisfaction he gets out of that but not relationship material not the jerk none of this would make serving someone food they can't eat acceptable it just eliminates every possible lame defense this guy deliberately put on a performance about the food he was preparing he got her worked up and expecting something really special even prepared it in front of her and then pulled a bait and switch for something he knew she couldn't eat and tried to guilt her into going against her medical diet by pulling the jealousy card nope he's testing her boundaries to see if he can be controlling am I the jerk for refusing to pitch in money towards my sister-in-law's IVF treatments my brother Reed and sister-in-law Nora have always wanted wanted to have kids however they're unable to conceive naturally Norah had multiple ovarian cysts and eventually needed to have both of her ovaries removed as a teenager Reed and Noah are in their early 30s and are very urgent about needing to try sooner than never because they say that they're approaching an age where IVF success rates start to decline because of Norah's past medical issues I'm told that she will need extra care and her round of treatments will be especially expensive a little over $27,000 Reed and Nora already have $99,000 set aside in savings for IVF they've raised $1,000 from Friends the rest of the family is pitching in smaller amounts as well my mother is giving $2,000 Norah's sister Lauren is giving 1,000 and her parents are giving $4,000 which leaves about $10,000 left their insurance will not help to cover it because they don't consider it a medically necessary procedure Reed and Nora also have had difficulty qualifying for an IVF loan as they have some poor CR credit Reed and Norah are asking me to help because according to the loan adviser I'm allowed to take out the loan on Reed and Norah's behalf $10,000 is a huge ask for me and the fact that Reed and Nora have poor credit shows they already don't have a good track record of paying back loans when I questioned why they didn't ask Lauren they claimed they couldn't because she isn't single and childless like I am they see it as me not having any dependence my mother and parents-in-law don't have a lot of savings and there earlier mentioned Don ations were already a huge gift for them it takes a long time to correct a bad credit score and it makes things much more difficult and harsh as it is to say I don't want to take out thousands of dollars in a loan for a procedure that has a good chance of not even working so I told Reed and Nora know and that their future kids are not my responsibility I also wanted to put my foot down now because next it's going to be private school tuition or a college fund and that shouldn't be my responsibility just because I'm currently single and childless Nora was obviously disappointed but told me she respected my choice Reed was angry he told me that he would remember this for when I'm ever in a time of need so that I will know how it feels to have family turn their back on me the rest of the family members have essentially told me we're not mad at you just disappointed because Norah worried for years that she would never be able to have kids or be a mother they say Reed and Norah would be wonderful parents and it isn't right that they can't conceive naturally which I do agree with however I still stand by Norah and Reed's future kids not being my responsibility I don't think that it's fair that I should delay or give up the possibility of starting my own family in order to finance reita noras am I the jerk not the jerk and as a mom I wonder if they can afford having a kid if they can't even take a $10,000 loan oh no not the jerk that is not your responsibility I'm sorry that they're struggling but Common Sense would beg the question if they can't afford IVF how could they afford the kid the treatment may not even be successful in addition being single and childless and child-free doesn't mean you don't have your own obligations and causes to which you'd want your money to go best of luck to you not the jerk never loan money or coign a note for people who can't get a loan on their own there's a reason Banks reject them it's astounding to me that people are so Brazen you should put your financial stability at risk just because they'd want you to that's nuts finally maybe Reed and Norah should wrap their heads together around the idea that they cannot afford IVF and should consider something radical like adoption adoption is actually more expensive than IVF from the conversations with people around my age who adopted or considered it it's typically $50 to $80,000 from what I've been told you can do Foster to adopt but that is not a setup which everyone can handle and if they only want a fresh newborn baby they probably won't want to do that since it's usually Toddlers and older we adopted and it was less than your numbers adoption has a lot of possibilities my cousin has done Foster to adopt for two infants and had expenses of less than $2,000 in total here's the reality some people want to be parents they can adopt some people want to be pregnant there's nothing wrong with that and adoption doesn't satisfy it I wish people would distinguish these more often if a person can't get pregnant that doesn't mean they will never be a parent however it may mean they will never experience pregnancy for some people that's devastating bro this dude really thinks it costs $80,000 to adopt a kid calm down Karen it's Reddit you know how these people are I made a customer cry so I had a table a long time ago with a nice couple who were at the restaurant during our dying down hours everything was pretty quiet at this point we were close to closing and I was bartending so I had started my cleaning duties for that well this couple had been extremely Pleasant I offered different items to upsell the check and they were happy I was giving suggestions I made them several drink refills they were very polite and just enjoying their night but they were pretty quiet I didn't mind though I was busy cleaning up and closing down the bar after I give them their meals I say all right you guys if everything looks okay I'll leave you to it if you need anything I'll just be cleaning behind the bar here so you can wave at me or call me over if you need something but I'll still be keeping an eye on you guys and checking up a few times I usually only offer this towards the end of the night night since I'm kind of distracted with scrubbing things down doing dishes and Other Bar rated things but this couple was content with just quietly eating their meals they didn't need any more drinks or anything so I just cleaned when I noticed they had finished their meals I went over and offered a dessert for them to try upselling of course and they happily said sure So I went and grabbed it for them I also grabbed two new spoons since IID cleared their table already well I had my nails done at this time and I'm not quite sure how it happened but when I sat down the plate with the dessert I went to hand the woman her spoon somehow the spoon slipped from my fingers as I was handing it to her and it flung and pelted her kind of hard in her chest I immediately went from professional service voice to panicked unexpected voice and rushed together oh my goodness I'm so sorry I swear I wasn't trying to throw that at you this sweet woman just started laughing and laughing and laughing until she was crying uncontrollably at her table and when she finally caught her breath she said said that was the funniest thing to ever have happened to me in a restaurant she started laughing and crying again so I started to chuckle once I knew she wasn't upset and her partner was just smiling while he ate his cake and said if you knew the day she had today you'd know how much it means that you got her to laugh this hard I just chuckled again and said well I'm glad I could make you laugh did you hear that panic in my voice I was so worried I would have accidentally upset you which caused her to laugh and cry even harder and say between laughs that's what's making me laugh so hard you sounded so panicked compared to your service voice after I laughed and apologized again I decided to just leave them at that point to enjoy the rest of their meal and as I was cleaning up some more behind the bar the woman was still laughing and eating her dessert she laughed all the way until her and her partner walked out of the door the guy left me $50 with a note thanking me for making his wife's day better and to not throw spoons at any more customers am I the jerk for telling my brother it was a dumb decision to invite his new girlfriend to our nephew's birthday I'm 20 male my brother Ron is 27 he met his late girlfriend Linda when they were 16 and they started dating shortly after to say the family adored her would be an understatement Linda was beautiful smart and had an amazing sense of humor she's been part of the family for so long that most of us don't remember a time without her most of our best memories have her in them Linda was very close to my nephew Drew who's six Drew is disabled and he's autistic so he has a hard time connecting to other people I don't know how to describe the relationship between Drew and Linda they just sort of clicked from the moment he was born she was his best friend and would often watch over him sadly Linda passed at the end of January after she was hit by a drunk driver the entire family was devastated and we're still mourning her Drew took it especially hard since he doesn't really grasp what death means yet he constantly asks where is Linda and when will she be coming back sometimes going as far as having full-blown meltdowns because he misses her so much he's currently attending therapy to learn how to process his grief but it's a slow process Drew's birthday is in 2 weeks and my sister and brother-in-law sent out invitations to everyone in the family asking who can come birthdays are a big deal in our family and are usually an over-the-top event with catering so it's necessary to confirm the number of guests apparently Ron wrote that he'll come with Gia a new girlfriend he's hoping to introduce to the family most of the family's upset at him for moving on so quickly I personally think it's none of my business and I'm not going to tell him what to do or how to live his life however bringing a new partner over to his nephew's birthday when he knows how said nephew was so attached to his former girlfriend and is still mourning her is idiotic at best and cruel at worst brother-in-law told Ron that if he's planning on bringing that girl over for Drew's birthday he shouldn't bother coming at all Ron called me to complain and I told him the same thing he shouldn't bring her over Ron called me a jerk and a bad brother he said he's finally happy again after Linda's passing and why is it so hard for us to accept that he moved on and support his relationship I told him I'm happy to hear he's doing well and I'm sure the family would someday love to meet the girl that makes him so happy but I'm standing by my opinion that inviting her now was a dumb decision on his part and he chose the worst possible time and place to introduce someone new to the family edit Ron and Linda were still together when she passed away not the jerk I don't think your brother should be punished for finding happiness with someone new and shouldn't be held to your family's timetable for grief but Drew's birthday is the wrong time to introduce her to the family given how young Drew is and how attached he was to Linda am I the jerk for not giving my sister-in-law and her family a luxury vacation I travel a lot for work so I have so many hotel and Airline points it's crazy this summer I'm taking my family to Disney World we're going to stay at one of the resorts on the property my sister-in-law and her family had a hard time during lockdown so I decided to do something nice and invite them along my treat I said I would pay for their flights hotel and park tickets everyone was excited until she started talking to my wife now she's upset that we're staying at one of the resorts and they have to stay at Disney Springs apparently I'm being cheap by using points for their hotel instead of just paying for them to stay at the same Resort as us my wife told her sister and brother-in-law to just shut up and accept the gift but they didn't they told my in-law that I was making their kids Jealous by not letting them enjoy the same stuff as us to be clear the hotel I booked for them is very nice it's just not the Grand Floridian so I finally talked to them and gave them the choice of accepting my gift or not coming since I could still cancel their reservations they started yelling at me for being a jerk and taking something away from their kids I had talked to them like adults but when they started screaming their kids heard them and found out that they might not be going now their kids are upset at their parents for possibly messing up their vacation and I'm the bigger jerk for making them look bad in front of their kids am I the jerk let me get this straight you're gifting them airline tickets Park tickets and a nice hotel and they demand more cancel their tickets immediately for their benefit too so they Dro this entitled idiocy forever so the kids can learn you get nothing if you're being a jerk so they don't try to walk all over you in the future not the jerk that would be them poor kids heck I'll take this amazing gift with endless gratitude Disney Springs got 4.85 out of five stars I'll be so happy and grateful if anyone did this for me your sister-in-law could have chosen this route your uncle is just amazing and is offering us this Unforgettable trip we'll be staying at a different location but doing all of the same parks and activities together this will give us the chance to have some time with just us as a family too aren't we lucky to have such generous people in our family we are really so blessed but alas wow w w I want more more more am I the jerk for flipping out on my husband via text after he let his phone die during a family emergency so I 34 female and my husband 35 male had a plan this weekend that he would be the next state over for a College reunion while I stayed home with our one-year-old baby all is fine and well until yesterday right before he was leaving for the party that was at a bar and I got an unexpected call from my parents who also live out of state I'm a nurse so they were asking what they should do with my grandma who called them stating that she couldn't feel her foot and that she was in excruciating pain I told them to take her to the ER immediately and they said she couldn't walk so I told them to call an ambulance I called my husband right after and the last update that I gave him before his party was that they were transferring her to another hospital for the emergency surgery for a life-threatening condition I was waiting anxiously at home when the surgery was taking way longer than expected around 3 hours my husband hadn't checked in at all I got a text from a number that I didn't know that was a drunk selfie of some guy in my husband with zero context I texted my husband and said that I was worried sick about my grandma and didn't appreciate getting texted drunk selfies from random people heard nothing after an hour I texted the random number and asked if my husband's phone had died and he said yes with a laughing emoji here's where I may be the jerk I texted back cool my grandma is still in emergency surgery laughing face I never got a reply to this about 4 hours later when my grandma survived and was transferred to the ICU I texted my husband how much he had let me down this turned into a fight where he believes that he did nothing wrong because I knew he was looking forward to this party for 2 months and he couldn't do anything anyway I blew up and told him how irresponsible it was for him to get drunk and let his phone die while I was alone with our baby during a family emergency he apologized for not checking in more to which I corrected that he didn't check in at all not even the next morning and he says that he did his due diligence in making himself reachable and I said that a random number texting me a drunk selfie does not count as him telling me that his phone was dead and that's how I should reach him he said the name of the bar in passing a few times but I couldn't remember the name and I did not know the name of his hotel he says I'm just overreacting and it's not a big deal because it's not like he could do anything from another state and that he did nothing wrong seeing his friends was important to him and a lot of them he hasn't seen in 15 years and that he shouldn't have to disrupt his plans to cater to me I didn't ask him to take the next flight home just to be available or communicate that he wasn't I told him that I was afraid and he could have at least checked to see if I was okay and that it also isn't okay to let your phone die when someone else has your kid even without an emergency so am I the jerk for flipping out on him ETA the emergency happened right before the party so he was sober at the time and it aware of the situation I called him immediately after I had my parents call 911 you're the jerk let your husband enjoy himself and give him a break from the endless nagging don't be surprised when he cheats on you with another woman one who isn't going to nag him constantly about things that he has absolutely no control over you guys are heartless individualistic jerks they're a family his a partner and a father first the least he could have done is check in as soon as he knew what was happening and apologize for missing communication earlier this is the minimum expectation for an adult partner with a kid at home not the jerk wishing your grandma a speedy recovery I can only imagine how alone and scared you must have felt and then the disrespectful drunk selfie on top of that your husband should be feeling mortified and needs to properly apologize and show support yes exactly so many people apparently think it's acceptable to just abandon your spouse in the name of having fun my husband and I have lives outside of our marriage but we always make sure we're reachable or inform the other person when we aren't able to be moral support during an event like this should not be so much of a debate it's the bare minimum you do for a partner you're supposed to love and have promised to support in good times and in bad times this is one of those bad times for your spouse and you should make yourself available to them for that even if it is long distance am I the jerk for declining to be my cousin's bridesmaid because our wedding is on the same week as my college graduation my cousin let's call her paully she's 24 recently got engaged and she announced that the wedding would be in Puerto Rico next year Paulie is the first person in my generation to be getting married so it's a very exciting thing for our extended family growing up we were not super close since our parents didn't have a good relationship however as we were the only girls in our generation she asked me to be a bridesmaid for her which I am very flattered by the problem however is that the wedding is on the same week as my college graduation at my School graduation consists of a week-long events traditions and ceremonies which I know may sound trivial but I didn't have a high school graduation due to lockdown and my entire first year was online so I've been looking forward to the graduation festivities for the past few years I told paully that I couldn't be her bridesmaid since I don't want to miss my own graduation and also that I probably won't have the bandwidth to help her with all of the brides M's duties leading up to the wedding I could still attend the actual ceremony since it's the day after my graduation but I just wouldn't be able to arrive before then my cousin got very upset and basically told me I'm being selfish for putting my wants over our family and threatening to not invite me to the wedding I lost my temper and told her that she could go ahead and take my name off the list then since I cannot be her bridesmaid now my entire extended family is asking me to apologize to paully and to agree to be her bridesmaid my aunt Paulie's mom actually suggested me to skip graduation altogether since they will just mail me the diploma if I can't attend my parents were not very happy with what my aunt said and now they're having an argument with her and also said they would not attend the wedding either I didn't mean for it to get to this point and now my grandparents are also getting involved yesterday my grandma actually called me and offered to pay for my flight to Puerto Rico if I agree to be Paulie's bridesmaid and it really hurt because I've already made peace with the fact that she isn't coming to my graduation since she can't afford the extra plane ticket to fly from home to my college and then to Puerto Rico and the wedding is more important which I 100% understand but now it just feels like she doesn't even care am I the jerk for doing this I thought I was justified for not wanting to miss the graduation week but now I'm not so sure anymore considering all the reactions from my extended family and especially my grandma not the jerk congratulations op a 10-year graduation you earned it this is a legit conflict of schedules and you're not even that close with the cousin to begin with family is causing drama for its own sake am I the jerk for mansplaining to my girlfriend I personally don't think this is an issue of mansplaining but I want to present her perspective of the issue fairly and objectively I don't want to make this story seem completely one-sided like some of the other stories I read on here I 23 male am someone who loves fun facts I love telling my friends and family fun facts and seeing their faces light up with the same interest as mine when I had first heard the fact I've been getting the feeling lately that my girlfriend who's 23 isn't really treating me with respect when she talks to me she acts kind of withdrawn and dismissive and I sometimes feel like she responds to me as though she's like a boss speaking to a subordinate whenever I tell her things she may be listening or she may not be yesterday I told her a fun fact about how styrofoam containers aren't actually made from styrofoam instead they're made from a material called poyene and she didn't even blink and just said okay today we were over at a friend's house for dinner and she let us take some pasta home for leftovers and I heard my girlfriend say hand me that styrofoam container I got a little annoyed since this was proof that she doesn't give a hoot about the things I said so I said in an annoyed voice it's made of polished sty it's made of Polish styrene not Styrofoam but I guess it doesn't matter what I say since you wouldn't listen anyway after that all heck broke loose and my girlfriend is refusing to talk to me because I was rude even even though I was literally just pointing out that she's being disengaged and disrespectful to me by not caring about the things I say and making me feel kind of unimportant you're the jerk I wouldn't listen to you either styrofoam is a brand name for polystyrene he'd still be the jerk even if it were a different brand hand me the Kleenex please it's Scotty's don't you ever listen you're the jerk the common name used is styrofoam so her calling it that doesn't mean she's not paying attention to you sharing fun facts is fine but it's unreasonable to share a fun fact about as an example the scientific word for turkeys and then get mad when the person you told continues to use the word turkey instead of the scientific name I really hope this is the first time you made this type of comment about your girlfriend not paying attention to what you say because if it isn't that sounds incredibly annoying it's not mansplaining it's info dumping other people may appreciate it but it sounds like your girlfriend would like it to be less since it appears she gets higher doses of info dumping than anyone else while fun facts are cool to constantly talk about them can be exhausting where's your respect for your girlfriend exactly do you ask her if she'd like to know a fun fact or do you assume and just tell her styrofoam fun fact would only be a fun fact to someone interested in styrofoam and how things are made why did you get annoyed over your girlfriend asking for it to go container it makes no sense no one is going to ask for a poyene container why would you call her out in front of people people you seem to be the one that is extremely ignorant and disrespectful you're the jerk you're the jerk and that doesn't sound like a fun fact to be honest perhaps you might need to learn facts that people actually find interesting because what material some everyday item is made of is just not it also a styrofoam container is called that for a reason she's not wrong for calling the product by the name it was given agreed a fun fact would be talking about why we call them styrofoam containers instead of poing also op sounds like a super boring person to be around if this is their idea of fun am I the jerk for bringing up the fact my brother hasn't had a steady job since he graduated 3 years ago today we had a little barbecue for Memorial Day at my mom's house and my brother who's 21 was noticeably tired and not really speaking unless spoken to but he's kind of always been like that it was enough to be noticeably worse today though I asked him how he was doing and he said he's fine and he just had a long night with his friends playing PlayStation I told him he should have probably planned to go to sleep early so he'd have energy for the barbecue today and he sarcastically responded that he couldn't help it I regret my response to this but I said maybe you'd have more energy if you had a job his demeanor quickly sh his demeanor quickly shifted and he was pretty insulted but it's been a recurring argument between us that he needs to get off his butt and help our mom with rent but for some reason he just doesn't no matter how hard we poke and pet him he won't budge he's not in college and the only money he makes is when he goes logging with his dad which isn't really a job and only happens a few times a month eventually he started crying and ran to his room my mom was upset with me for ruining the barbecue which I didn't expect to happen and told me I should probably leave I'm 23 female and I've had a job ever since high school and I'm in college currently I moved out when I was 19 and never looked back but but for some reason my mom isn't as strict with my brother as she was with me she occasionally sends him links to places that are hiring and that's it honestly he's got a heart of gold and a lot of friends and family who adore him I just wish he'd get a job to help my overworked mom out am I the jerk you told him maybe he'd have more energy if he had a job this right here is a cheap shot and doesn't even make sense not to mention a drama starter can't blame your mom for asking you to leave you T that you've had a job since high school go to school currently and live on your own yet here you are starting unnecessary childish drama at a family BQ you're the jerk you're taking a problem that has nothing to do with you and making it your problem comments like that are not going to help him he's an adult his job situation is his to deal with and if he's not paying rent to your mom that's up to your mom to sort out I also think that you are not accounting for details you may be unaware of here like if he may be dealing with some mental health issues or other problems in his life you're the jerk it's not your place to shame him if your parents have an issue with him not paying rent or his lack of employment they can talk to him it's not your place if all the poking and prodding hasn't worked before it's not going to work now a family Barbecue for the holiday isn't the time nor place for such shaming anyway op seems to think that adults should have jobs and not stay up all night playing video games you really thought the people on Reddit were going to agree with you don't leave the clearance section until you finished tidying it another taale for my retail job which I recently quit while I procrastinate for my other work this one is from about 15 years ago at my original store I worked in the ladies section doing recovery basically tidying up and sometimes printing price tickets for the shelves if any were missing or torn and though it was generally possible to get it finished within the time allotted for my shift busy days or events such as Mother's Day or pre- Christmas and Boxing Day sales turned it into nightmare as if the usual holiday shopping mess wasn't bad enough the department manager Stacy had in all her Infinite Wisdom decided to put all of the ladies wear clearance into the section at once they actually did it for all the closed departments but most of them only had a small amount so you could easily fit it all in the normal clearance racks however the ladies department had ended up with 10 times as much clearance as usual for this time of year because whoever decides what clothes we'll sell made bad choices and we ended up with mountains of Horrid outfits marked down to a dollar even though most people wouldn't wear it if you paid them $50 usually they would keep most of the excess stock out in the back and just have a few racks of it in the section and as the stuff in the section sold and the racks got empty they'd be replenished from more stock from out the back for some reason Stacy decided she wanted all the ladies wear clearance to be available to customers at once even though it didn't physically fit on the racks not to be deterred by stupid little things like logic and reason she moved the regular stock from the main middle aisle of the section into other aisles causing those to be over full and ordered the full staff to put the clearance all along the middle aisle when I say the clothes were literally bulging off the shelf arms I'm not exaggerating you could barely even walk down the aisle without the first four to five things on each arm falling off and of course if a customer wanted to look at anything further back on the Shelf they'd knock most of the other stuff off in the process so there was constantly a several inch layer of clothes lying on the floor this made it literally impossible to actually recover the clearance section properly but generally recovery staff were told to prioritize doing a little pickup every hour or so and make sure there was no stock on the floor and spend the rest of the time going through and recovering the section making sure everything was in the right place and in the correct size order so I had a shift on boxing day and I'd heard from the pre-shift Huddle that one of the big regional managers was coming in to visit and inspect the store at closing time and that we needed to make sure the store was perfect not sure how that was meant to happen on boxing day and with half the number of Staff we needed but whatever when I started my shift 90% of the clearance clothing was on the floor for most of the aisle you couldn't even see the floor I knew that there was no way I'd be able to keep the floor clean in the clearance section because my shift ended at the same time the store closed anything I tidied up would immediately become destroyed by customers so I decided decided I would focus on getting the rest of the section presentable and then quickly try to pick up the clearance section in the last 10 to 15 minutes of the shift before the store shut down at the start of my shift I did a half attempted pickup in clearance and tried to shove most of the mess to the side a bit so that it would at least not be right in the middle of the aisle and then went to start the rest of the section only to be confronted by Stacy Stacy what are you doing have you seen clearance why aren't you fixing it it's all over the floor me yeah because you put too much stock in there I picked it up but it falls off again because the shelves are too full and customers just knock it down as soon as I fix it anyway Stacy well are you planning to do anything about it me right now I can't do anything about it there are so many customers in the aisle I can hardly get in there anyway and since I can't keep clearance tidy with customers in the store I figured I'd get the rest of ladies wear tidied and then pick up clearance at the end Stacy not good enough you need to make sure clearance is off the floor and sorted properly you know Bob regional manager is due for a visit this evening me I understand that but like I said it's literally impossible to recover clearance because of how much stock is in there and how many customers there are if I can at least do the rest of the area first then it will only be clearance that looks a bit rough and I can at least make sure everything is off the floor at the end of the shift Stacy you don't get to decide what you PRI prioritize you need to make sure clearance is perfect I know no one likes clearance but you need to stop making excuses to get out of doing it so don't leave the clearance section until you finish tidying it me okay 5 minutes before my shift ends and the store closes the regional manager Bob shows up and is escorted around the store by the store manager Mark and Stacy they stop in front of ladies wear and Stacy just breathes what on Earth you see I had f finished tidying clearance but the shelves were still over full none of the stock was on the floor in that aisle and everything was in the right size order and hanging neatly the clearance section was my magnum opus of recovery if I do say so myself however the rest of ladies wear Department had not been touched since I couldn't finish tidying clearance until the store was pretty much closed and I wasn't allowed to leave clearance until I did finish it it meant that the rest of the department looked like a bomb and hit it with stock all over the floor clothes rped over the shelves instead of hung up properly broken coat hangers everywhere and abandoned shopping baskets and piles of stock from other departments left lying around in the aisles Bob and Stacy looked like they were about to lose it on me but Mark who knew I was generally a good worker asked why the department was in such poor condition given that I was meant to have been recovering it for 3 hours I explained Stacy told me I wasn't allowed to leave the clearance section until I'd finished tidying it but there's so much Overstock and so many customer pulling things apart that most of the stock won't stay on the shelves and one of those moments of perfect Cosmic timing right as I said that one of the Shelf arms behind me gave way with a loud crash sending an entire rack of clothes to the floor Mark just stared at me silently for a few seconds and then said to me well you've done well under the circumstances you can go home I'm not sure if Stacy got into any trouble but nothing else was said about it to me by the store manager and I never got any warnings or disciplinary action or anything anything the following shift more rails had been brought out from the back and placed in the central aisle of the store and some of the clearance had been moved to those rails to free up space and ladies wear Stacy refused to talk to me for about a fortnite though Karen serves rotten food to the wedding guests gets exposed my husband 27 male and I 26 female were married 8 months ago we had a big wedding with lots of food and drinks and people I knew we would likely have leftovers so I had arranged for them to be dop ated to the soup kitchen we sometimes work with however my mom went behind my back and took most of the food with her I didn't really know what happened to the food until now my sister cie who's 30 got married over the long weekend she didn't want to mess with any of the planning and knowing how my mom was during my wedding decided to let our mom take over the whole thing all we had to do is show up where we were told and party the ceremony was beautiful but it was when the buffet was revealed that I noticed something odd the food looked eerily familiar like identical to what I had had for my wedding except for a little more dried out and sad I found an opening and went to ask my mom about it when she happily told me that she saved a fortune by unfreezing the food from my wedding to serve to the guests now I was horrified and immediately voiced my concerns about safety she got upset and said I was acting like a snob and should be happy the food wasn't going to waste I argued that it was never going to be wasted but she wouldn't hear it I didn't want to make a scene but I was worried about people getting sick so I snuck off to see my sister she was horribly embarrassed mentioned that mom had said something about saving money but didn't question it because she didn't want to foot the bill like I had she told me not to eat the food and thanked me for everything from there my husband and I discreetly started telling some of the guests to be weary of the food and the rest of the night was fine my mom caught some Flack for being cheap but I've also been catching heat myself some of our relatives have been saying that I int intentionally made my family look bad and that the food was fine as it was frozen and then defrosted for the wedding they say no one would have known if I didn't make a stink over it I don't know if I did anything wrong I could use some help and would like to know if I should apologize am I the jerk edit I'm getting a lot of repeat questions so I figured I'd post here one my wedding had about 200 guests my husband has a large family and we intentionally planned for more people to come and knew that a lot wouldn't for one reason or another so we knew we'd likely have leftovers and wanted to be smart about it two my sister and her husband have been together for about 10 years they recently decided to get married for tax reasons and wanted to do a courthouse wedding but my mom begged her to let her do an event so she had a small wedding with only 50 people my sister hates planning and people so she let my mom do everything three have y'all ever heard of garage freezers they're super common where I'm from not the jerk OMG it's not that it was stored Frozen for 8 months it's that it's said on a buffet table for who knows how long at your wedding then in your mother's car before it was frozen this is not only tacky but super dangerous not the jerk has nothing to do with it being frozen but how it was frozen stored and then thought out unless mom has a food handling degree I'm sure that food has extras not the jerk this is straight up unsanitary and a major health hazard your mother is a cheap gross and dangerous person oh yeah and she's a jerk am I the jerk for telling my husband I'm not comfortable driving with our newborn 3 hours every day to take my older stepson to school my husband 36 male and I 33 female have been together for 6 years he has a son who's 10 from a previous marriage that goes to school 45 minutes away from us right next to his biological mom's house he's with us almost 5 days out of the week so either my husband or I have been driving him to school every day that's almost 3 hours back and forth I asked for him to to be moved to a school that's closer to us since he spends the majority of his time at our house my husband and his ex decided that for now it's best that he goes to the same school because of familiarity and maybe next year he'll go closer to us it's ultimately their decision and not mine I'm currently pregnant and our baby is due at the very end of December I asked my husband if my stepson can be taken to school by his biological mom for a month or so after the baby is home so that I don't have to drive 3 hours every day with a newborn in the cold and Midwest snow especially since winter break is over a week or so after I give birth to my surprise I got hit with don't worry biological mom and I will figure out the arrangements for our son I get that you will now have a different kid as a priority but I'm sure that if stepson was your biological son you wouldn't have a problem doing what needs to be done for both of them I'm so hurt by that statement I've taken care of my stepson as if he was my own since he was four and I've never treated him any different I'm on maternity leave now until May of 2024 4 so I will be home and my husband works 24-hour shifts so he can't take him on the day that he's working so that responsibility falls on me my family lives an hour away so that's not an option to help with driving or babysitting every day my husband doesn't have contact with his family so am I the jerk for asking for help after the baby is born for a month or so edit his biological mom works 5 days a week 12-hour shifts so she'd have to switch her schedule in order to take him to school every day edit thank you everyone for your feedback back and concurring that I'm not crazy in this situation I've been crying about this thing the entire morning I've read every single comment and the majority of you are right it's a hard pill for me to swallow but I will have to put my foot down I have a lot to think about and discuss with my husband but I know one thing for sure is I'm not going to put my baby at risk by driving for such long periods of time thank you for caring about me not the jerk your husband is completely ignorant he expects you to be up feeding a baby all night then get two kids ready to to go drive an hour and very possibly bad weather at 6:00 or 7: a.m. there and back then again a couple of hours later this cannot even be for the benefit of your stepson both kids and you suffer it's not safe sleep deprivation is not safe what about when the baby needs to be fed in you're driving you'll have to pull over stepson has to wake up too early and spend that limited amount of time out of school in a car no one is reachable should your stepson need a parent while he's in school such as illnesses or injuries your husband is not a good parent or spouse he and his ex are not thinking about their kids or you if they aren't there to actually parent their kids then they need to figure their own stuff out and not put that on you not the jerk pregnancy or not biological or not driving 3 hours a day for a 10-year-old to go to school when it clearly isn't necessary is a bit unhinged if you were in the absolute middle of nowhere and online school wasn't available maybe not the jerk let them figure it out you'll be a busy mom with with a newborn I think your counter argument would be if he were my son I would enroll him in a school closer to where he lives so he'd be closer to friends have a better social experience and doesn't need to spend 3 hours in a car every day am I the jerk for expecting my brother-in-law to pay for my jet ski after he let my nephew wreck it I just had my family out to the lake for Memorial Day I work remotely from there so it's not just a vacation home it's my home I'm single and I like to buy myself toys I also like to entertain I own two jet skis they're a lot of fun but also really powerful my sister and her family came up for the weekend we had a good time and I had a blast Towing the kids around on a tube the problem came when one of my nephews wanted to drive the machine I said no because while I may call it a toy it's not actually a toy when I was in the house my brother-in-law let my nephew drive it but they skipped a step because he's an idiot he forgot to attach the Heather clip to the life jacket the kid lost control and fell off normally the tether is a switch in case you fall off and it turns the machine off if you do so so the jet ski took off for a bit and then started making slow circles until it ran into a dock a bunch of the plastic on the top broke and some got badly scratched they came and told me and I told him he had to pay for fixing my machine he's mad because it was an accident I said he took it and gave it to someone who didn't have permission or experience and he's responsible my sister and I talked and she paid me for the parts I will need to fix my brother-in-law is upset because it came out of their fun budget and now he has to save up again for their vacation am I the jerk edit my nephew wasn't hurt just scared because he fell off almost getting run over by it and having to swim to shore not the jerk your brother-in-law should be begging you not to press charges that was stupid and dangerous and he risked his own son's life with his attitude for real no means no why would your brother-in-law allow his son to to use this machine without ensuring his safety in the first place it came out of his fun budget boohoo be responsible not the jerk am I the jerk for kicking my sober brother-in-law out of my barbecue I 31 male and my wife gal 30 female recently bought our first house and yesterday we hosted our first big barbecue with both sides of the family and friends gal's brother Jim who's 26 has been sober for 5 months I don't like Jim besides that he's generally an annoying person he struggled with his drinking and pills for many years and did all kinds of stuff to the people around him lots of theft and trustpass to keep it brief he's sober now lives with gal's mom and I guess he is getting his life together though he still isn't working or dealing with his court stuff so I don't know what exactly that entails he's become absolutely insufferable in his sobriety everything is about Jesus or sobriety which I could make peace with but he also has made it a habit of trying to save every everyone around him from the dangers of alcohol every visit turns into a sermon or him walking around asking personal questions about people's drinking habits insisting they need to reconsider their relationship with alcohol I specifically told gal that if Jim was invited to this barbecue that she was going to call Jim and tell him that we wanted none of his preaching there she got on the phone with him but she was beating around the bush so I asked her to put it on speaker and I told him Jim you are invited but you will not talk about sobriety prompted to any guests you're not a doctor or a counselor or nothing so just don't I don't want to hear a word both gal and Jim said they understood well the barbecue starts everyone was having a good time and my uncle shows up I offer him a beer and he says something like after this week I'm going to need something stronger boy where's the brown stuff on Q Jim says something like I don't know kind of concerning that that's how you choose to deal with a bad week no I straight up say hey Jim how about you grab your stuff and get out of here he says oh come on I didn't mean it like that I say Jim I'm not asking you twice get the heck out of here I've known this man my whole life and you just called him a drunk in front of my family so you can leave he tried defending himself and I just said I asked for not a word Jim everyone says I'm the jerk for not even giving him a chance or letting him apologize but I think I was clear enough so am I the jerk edit later on when mother-in-law sister-in-laws and gal kept going back to the point Jim did not call your uncle a drunk and I kept saying he sure did if he's saying my uncle deals with his issues with booze then you're calling him a drunk they say I'm putting words in his mouth and that's not fair I said he's the one calling out people for problem drinking what's he think people are going to do when he's calling them out not the jerk but you didn't want him there because you don't like him so you shouldn't have invited him in the first place not the jerk this is about intention brother-in-law didn't atttend to enjoy a social Gathering he came to preach judge and condemn his recovery journey is an ego trip he was not there to catch up with family talk and laugh he was there to cast the Sinners down and shine his Divine Light upon the ignorant masses he's the textbook definition of insufferable you don't owe anyone an invite why would you tolerate someone whose only desire is to rain on your parade not the jerk sure you were overly aggressive but now your brother-in-law knows that you're serious about this and maybe next time when you say no preaching he will take you seriously unfortunately with setting boundaries like this you have to be Ironclad with it the first few times to let people know that you're serious otherwise they will walk all over them would I be the jerk to pay $5,000 to not shave my head I female 36 have a severe case a condition where a minor infection causes the immune system to attack the sheath around my nerves my case was severe and I lost all strength in and control of my arms and legs my face arms torso below my waist and my legs all feel like I put them to sleep and there's almost no feeling in these areas I was in the hospital for 3 weeks I required an ambulance to get me out of bed and appointments for 3 months I have very long hair down to my butt it's always been very important to me it makes me feel like me which is super important when I've lost everything else I've lost all ability to do things I'm passionate about laying in a hospital bed is havoc on the hair I asked my wife 43 female to brush it several times but it never happened she's done what I needed otherwise it did hurt a bit as she knew how I felt about my hair I asked the Care staff at the hospital but they were too busy by the time I got home my hair was in a horribly Tangled braid pre-illness I could have gotten it free in a few hours but I couldn't control my hands at all at this point my wife made a half effort to untangle it but lacked the patience for it she called a few stylists to see if if someone could come to our house and work on it but no dice over the next 3 months lying in bed my hair transformed into a hard matted baseball on top of my head when I could get out a bit we tried a few local salons but they had no idea how to fix it all suggested shaving it off and that hurts my heart a lot it would take 6 years to grow it back this brings me to the issue there's a salon 9 hours away that specializes in the issue I have an appointment next week after an 8we wait the problem the believe it will take 20 hours over 4 days to fix it the appointment will cost $4,000 and it's another $600 at least for gas Hotel food and expenses we're not rich in good times but my wife has had to quit working to be home to care for me my medical supplies have increased spending it takes forever to get Medicaid to cover supplies this is a disgusting amount of money we could really use elsewhere if I felt like this was my fault I wouldn't even consider spending that money I feel like my wife could could have prevented this all by just brushing my hair or having a measure of patience to detangle it when I got home also she clearly hates working on my hair and I will need someone to brush it possibly forever she's the only option I know being a caregiver is hard enough I don't want to be more of a burden there's also the chance none of this works and I have to pay a lot of money and still lose it I could live with a shaved head no matter how hard it would be tomorrow morning is my last chance to cancel and get most of my deposit back would I be the jerk for spending all this money on on my hair have you considered that your wife may be exhausted she's already had to quit her job to care for you adding your specialized Hair Care on top of everything else is asking too much on top of that you would be using money both of you need to live rent food utilities Transportation medical supplies ask yourself this is your hair more important than your wife eating you would be the jerk if you spend $5,000 on your hair when neither of you have an income edit per op's comment the wife also o need surgery and they have a kid I'm not going to call you a jerk but the reality is that you can't afford the expense here's the thing even if you spend $5,000 and your hair turns out perfect what happens next month the month after that you can't take care of your own hair your wife doesn't like taking care of your hair you would be the jerk to spend that amount of money fixing your hair that you cannot care for yourself soft you're the jerk you can't afford this I know you love your hair but with no income coming in 5,000 is an awful lot to spend on something that isn't an absolute necessity also what happens after it doesn't seem like your wife is going to start taking care of it for you what's to say that it doesn't get matted up all over again is there any way that you could have the hair cut and made into a wig am I the jerk for revealing while I rejected a promposal nearly 10 years ago I 27 female attended School in the UK towards the end of our final year of school when we turned 18 our schools organized something called a formal which I suppose is a bit like a prom without the Romantic aspects as you're not supposed to go with anybody and the idea of prom puzzles generally isn't something that's done here nearly 10 years ago I Was preparing to leave school I found out that not only did a boy in my class have a massive crush on me for years but he was planning one of these massive prom posals that are often done at proms he had always been a horrendous bully to me he would go from calling me names and claiming that I would die alone and unloved to stealing my friend's phone to get my number or sneaking up behind me and cutting off strands of my hair or going so far as to find my house through my father's distinctive car naturally when the day for his prom posal came along he came out with his sign in front of the entire school and I bluntly said no and walked away I don't like confrontation or arguments but I had no intention of sparing his feelings after all he had done and I was honestly just uncomfortable and wanted to leave he badgered me until the day I left school for turning him down and being heartless his friends did the same I didn't care I recently met one of his old friends in my old town I went to the business where one of them was working and he kept bringing this up saying that my bully had gotten depressed after we left school and hadn't dated at all because he was embarrassed from the rejection and was still hung up over me he kept asking me why I felt it was okay to reject him like that over some nasty words and if I was really that petty I got sick of it so I told him turns out that because of all these creepy things that happened within the classroom he hadn't seen them or even heard of them happening his friends and my other bullies within the class were covering for him the friend abruptly left without a word but apparently the gossip did the rounds now the friend group is divided in two many of them who didn't know are upset with him for lying and upset that their other friends hid what was happening as they think it went too far the others are upset at me for airing his dirty laundry his parents apparently also know now and they're upset that he had their sympathy through lies and now they know that he practically stalked me which brings up questions about whether they want him to take over the small farm versus his younger brother I wonder if I should have just let his friend be mad at me I'd probably have never seen him again anyway I didn't know that he would tell anyone as he's never been one for gossip that I knew of but I also didn't expect this to potentially ruin the life of someone I haven't seen for nearly a decade am I the jerk for telling his friend the truth about what happened not the jerk were you expected to for someone who made your life horrible for years how could you possibly have known that everyone would find out and even if you did that changes nothing he chose to do what he did all those years ago and now he's getting found out for being a creep and a bully and lying to all of his friends and that's somehow your fault I don't think so am I the jerk for not sharing my inheritance with my cousins so I'm 31 female my mom passed when I was four she was 26 dad has never been in the picture after my mom's pass passing her twin brother my uncle jack became my legal guardian he passed away suddenly 2 months ago my grandparents started a watchmaking company over 50 years ago they ran it for over 40 years and retired a decade ago my uncle took over when I went to live with my uncle he just started working for the company full-time after graduating college instead of having a babysitter he would take me to work if I was not in school uncle met Melissa when I was 10 she was very nice to me they got married when I was 12 and had their first kid a few months later when my cousin Mark who 20 was born things changed she stopped packing my lunch and other stuff I knew that she was not my mom but before she would just look at me with a smile and after she would barely acknowledge my existence they had two more Sons anyways I worked there part-time as a teen helping out and Uncle taught me a few things uncle took over the company in 2012 my grandparents gave it to him he took it from 145 employees to almost 1,0 years even started a watchmaking school I went to college then Uncle hired me full-time as a designer time went on Mark would work for like 4 hours a week and get a full week's pay and I've heard all of my cousins and my aunt talk about how watchmaking is stupid and that it's too much for something that only tells you the time this comment is particularly ignorant as we don't make only watches anymore and I thought Mark paid just enough attention to know that but it seems I was wrong so it never seemed like they were interested in the company back to now after my uncle's funeral my aunt informed me that they were selling the company as it's useless to them but they were willing to let me make an offer first I was heartbroken I just lost my uncle and was probably going to lose my job because there was no way I could get the money last week my uncle's will was read all the money was divided in equal parts among me my cousins and my aunt she got part of his house I got the company 100% of it they were Furious I now have some friends saying it's their right to be upset for not getting something they understood that they were getting extended family calling me a thief because it was their father's company and my cousins texting me things like just give it to us we're contesting the will meeting our lawyer tomorrow or we're going to destroy you for what you're doing my grandparents are on my side but I just feel like I'm being harassed by all these people edit I can't fire Mark right now if I do it would just be a huge risk he has flexible hours written on his contract and his salar and with all this drama I'm getting a lawyer to deal with this and I don't actually talk to my aunt and two oldest cousins the youngest is 11 I just open their messages to take screenshots not the jerk they're just upset their payday was ruined your uncle clearly wanted his company to stay in the family that's why he gave it to you Karen and her family harassed my girlfriend and I over a parking spot big mistake I live on a culdesac where I rent a back house for my landlords there's another elderly tenant who lived in inside the landlord's house I was very close with that we'll call good sir I have these neighbors next to me who I had gotten along with for as long as I had lived here before lockdown the husband will call him Mr chill because he had been really cool with me my neighbors have three cars between them two belong to Mr chill and his wife we'll call her Mrs hypocrite and the other car belongs to their daughter when lockdown hit Mr chill's family for some reason that didn't make sense to me suddenly stopped parking their cars in the driveway and would park them all on the curb in front of their house as well as daughter taking the spot I usually parked in finally after a few months of this going on I see their daughter outside and I ask her if she wouldn't mind sharing the spot that I used to park in with me explaining my situation with being overworked and exhausted from my job she gives me an annoyed look and just responds by saying I use it I realize I'm wasting my time I tell her never mind and I go inside not even 5 minutes later there there's a knock at the door and it's good sir letting me know that the neighbors want to talk with me Mrs hypocrite is standing there all upset asking me what the problem is I explain to Mrs hypocrite what I said to their daughter and she apologizes for coming off so angry and says you know street parking is what it is it's first come first serve and we're not parking to try and give anyone a hard time the conversation goes nowhere but we do end it peacefully about a week later I'm parked in my spot for a change and my girlfriend comes over to visit it's summertime and it's hot outside later that evening I get a knock on my door and it's good sir he says the neighbors want to talk and I see Mr chill standing right there and he just asks if my girlfriend could move her car because she's got a bunch of curb behind her but not enough for another car to fit before I can even say anything Mrs hypocrite shows up out of nowhere and goes off saying I'm sick of going back and forth about this she is double parked and there's not enough room for for another car to fit I understand that she's your girlfriend and she's visiting but I believe that residents should get priority parking first it looks like you guys are trying to save the parking for yourselves and I'm not dealing with this anymore she needs to move her car I'm in complete shock and have a lot that I wanted to say but I don't and I just go inside to ask my girlfriend to move she thinks they're Hypocrites and moves just because she feels like that's all they have to feel proud of in their lives the only reason I gave into them is just so my landlords do not get involved and risk it turning into them not wanting to renew my lease with me otherwise I would have said something funny enough even though they got upset at my girlfriend for double parking their daughter is the queen of doing that on our culdesac without Mrs hypocrite telling her anything last year in November good sir wasn't doing too well and went into Hospice Care he gave me his car as a gift and a thank you for being family to him I now had two cars two spots and an idea enter Petty malicious compliance Mrs hypocrite said that street parking is first come first serve and that residents should have priority over the parking well then so be it I only need to use one car and the other can just stay parked since I am a resident I decided to park whichever car I'm not using in the spot that I would normally park at and swap them out every 2 weeks in rotation my girlfriend parks in the reserved spot good sir used to the daughter her boyfriend and Mrs hypocrite have not touched that spot since I started doing this since one of my two cars is always there as a little bonus too Mrs hypocrite put one of their cars they aren't using back in the driveway and when there's a party going on and all the parking is taken up the spot in front of their house is sometimes open and since again I am a resident and the guests have all taken the other spots well I guess I do need a spot to park after all right sorry Mrs hypocrite and to the daughter I guess you'll just have to park around the block and take a nice walk to get to your house I'm only following what you believe the parking rule should be am I the jerk for filing a noise complaint about a single mom with a newborn i 26 female live in an apartment I'm a resident in a medical profession and I work 100 hour weeks plus a lot of additional hours of studying and paperwork I hardly sleep as it is I cannot wear earplugs because I need to be able to hear my phone when on call or if I'm called about a patient under my care this happens frequently and I never turn off off my phone and only update it when I'm at work just for an idea about how strongly I'm attached to my phone my downstairs neighbor had a baby last month since she came home from the hospital I haven't slept through the night I'm woken up every 1 to 2 hours by the baby and this baby screams I know the mom is trying her best I'm sure she doesn't want to be woken up either but I'm losing it I fell asleep Thursday standing up in the middle of rounds my attending was not impressed and I was reprimanded my boyfriend has been encouraging me to file a complaint because it's not fair that I can't sleep I've tried to talk directly to my neighbor to ask if she could stop walking around her whole apartment I've tried sleeping on my couch which is better but mom walks the baby around the apartment or maybe if there could be some soundproofing done but every time I've had the chance to go to her apartment she's got a note about the baby sleeping and please don't knock I do not have her number or any other way to contact her I feel weird about leaving a note and want to address it in person so I spoke to my landlord Friday evening I was very clear that I'm not trying to blame her I just wanted to know if there could be some soundproofing done or something the landlord said they would look into options well Saturday I had a day off mandated because I'm now considered a risk to patience which is causing a whole host of issues for me I was sleeping and woke up to pounding and screaming the mother was furious with me and kept screaming about how I'm selfish and trying to kick out a single mom Etc neighbors were watching and I kept trying to explain but she and the baby just kept screaming I lost it I'm beyond exhausted and just screamed back I told her that her baby is so loud she might cost me my job and that I just can't function anymore because of her and that soundproofing isn't the end of the world if she can't soundproof she should be considerate and buzz off from the apartment building she started crying and left I feel awful about it I know I shouldn't have yelled I know that makes me the jerk but am I the jerk for fing a complaint my impression was a landlord was going to fix the issue not kick her out I don't want that edit thank you for the replies just to address a couple points one yes working these hours is insane it's not okay but unfortunately the way this field works is you either get on with it or they will fire you and there goes the last decade of my life matching with another residency is next to Impossible besides I want this career hopefully it'll change as the younger generation pushes for change two I live on the top floor of my building I've been here 5 years there's been a few families with kids including babies that have lived here over the years Life Sounds have never been an issue this baby is loud and it's constant the baby will scream every 2 hours or so and can go on for over an hour most of the time I do not think the mom can just tell the baby to be quiet I want Solutions so I can sleep and that's it I've tried soundproofing my apartment short of tearing up the floor and installing insulation of some kind I've done everything that I could find online it has not helped I hear the baby crying by the way when the mother walks the baby around the apartment I don't hear her walking when the baby is in the bedroom I can sleep through the crying but when the baby walks over my head I cannot I cannot just move firstly finding the time to move or the money is impossible I have to live 15 minutes from the hospital which is why I can't stay at my boyfriend's and I'm lucky my landlord has kept my rent down he's rented to many residents from from this hospital for decades and cuts us a break since I can't afford anything else in this area I might be a doctor that works a lot but I don't even make $40,000 a year before taxes and then take about half of that to our student loans so moving to a house isn't an option four yes I could sleep in an on call room and do occasionally but as people have said the rooms are awful and they're not really quiet with all the other residents trying to work sleep Etc plus I think it's reasonable to want to go home and sleep when I can I have to make food do laundry call family in private and decompress alone so driving home and doing that and driving back to sleep for the foreseeable future isn't going to work five I don't wake up to vibrations I need the sound I've tried noise cancelling earbuds I don't like the headphones I can't get comfortable but spend most of the night terrified they'll fall out and I won't hear my phone so I don't sleep missing a call as automatic grounds for termination so the fear is very real for me six my landlord called called me earlier today and told me he heard about her coming to scream at me he informed me he had no intention of evicting anyone he spoke to her about when he could come and soundproof her apartment he's been considering this for a while and has decided to bite the bullet and soundproof every apartment starting with hers as multiple people have mentioned this to him as well she was never in danger of being evicted I never wanted that either babies cry but I didn't sign up for this I've never had this issue in any apartment I've lived in this is the first complaint I've made made in over 5 years besides my showerhead breaking I think soundproofing is valid maybe it'll disrupt this mother but I've decided I don't care long term this will be better for everyone and yes I'm the jerk for yelling at her I snapped and since everyone keeps saying this woman is exhausted and sleep deprived so I should be understanding I think the same can be said for me since I'm awake when she's awake so sleep deprivation on both ends probably led to very bad communication on both ends hopefully the soundproofing will resolve some issues Karen demands I pay $7,000 for her wedding dress I had an incident on my wedding day back in 2017 where my former fiance abandoned me and ran away with his pregnant mistress that image those details are forever engraved in my mind and I'll never forget how I felt that day this was truly a turning point in my life my family always has been there for me so I kept them close my younger sister is currently engaged and her wedding will be in a few months she's struggling with money so I decided to help help her and her fiance and pay for the wedding dress this allowed her to be able to buy her dream wedding gown that cost $7,000 it's a lot for a dress but she literally cried because she wanted it this happened a few days before we agreed to go buy the dress we were eating dinner at my parents' home and my cousin and Aunt were there my aunt was asking my sister about the wedding and my sister said that everything was going according to plan and then casually laughed and said let's just hope he won't run away with a pregnant mistress or something in our wedding day I was blown away completely she laughed and Aunt laughed too as if this was some sort of a joke she was basically mocking what happened with me in my wedding it happened so fast I got up and started screaming at her calling her an idiot but my parents asked me to take it easy and she said it was a joke and she didn't think I'd react so intensely my aunt remained seated and my cousin asked me to calm down and drink some water but I grabbed my stuff and as I was getting ready I told my sister she was was getting $0 for her dream wedding dress then I walked out I heard louder commotion as I walked and my dad and cousin followed me outside trying to talk but I asked to be left alone my dad spoke to me saying I was too harsh over my sister's joke and said that I know this is how she is with her dark sense of humor they said she'd been crying after I decided to back out of helping her and said this would ruin her wedding they want me to reconsider my decision since it might damage my relationship with my sister but I refused did I overreact info it's my aunt that would usually bring up what happened from time to time and say stuff like if what happened didn't happen you would have had at least two kids by now or do you know what day it is it's your wedding anniversary it's harsh but she stopped doing it maybe my sister is still being influenced by her it hurt the same and more coming from my own sister she was crying over a dress she should have been crying with remorse for how she hurt you not the jerk all she cares about is her day and her dress and your wallet tell her to buzz off and if anyone in your family gives you crap tell them the same tell them that in 10 years if she's matured and can sincerely apologize you might forgive her and you might consider a nice anniversary gift if the marriage lasts that long not the jerk I wish I had a dollar for every time I saw you know how she is on this sub it's just the same as saying yeah we know what they did was wrong but they don't listen to us so we're going to try to guilt you into fixing this you were under no obligation to pay for your sister's extremely expensive dress it was a wonderful act of kindness as thanks your sister threw the most traumatic experience of your life in your face and laughed about it $77,000 can buy a pretty amazing holiday op you definitely deserve it just saying oh yeah no better way to invest $7,000 than in some expensive holiday trip whoa what's wrong Karen you seem upset today now it's just sometimes the commenters say such stupid stuff like yeah the sister was a jerk and there's no way I would help with her wedding but telling someone to go waste $7,000 on a trip because of something like this that's just dumb well it's Reddit Karen you know how these people are they all compete for up votes and the more like sppy what you say is the more up votes you get yeah and the more common sense you have the more down votes you get you have to pay at this machine it legitimately pains me to write this one because I love this Barber Shop my barber shop I go here here all the time with my sons always Great Haircuts today's malicious compliance has to do with trying to Simply pay the bill my son got his crazy 16-year-old haircut his cut took a lot longer than mine so I waited until both of us were done to pay then it was time to pay as my son walked towards me I checked his cutout with cash in hand as I heard a man yelling sir sir hey you need to pay okay I started to walk towards him with my clearly visible cash but he wasn't looking at me he said you can't not pay you come over here and pay right now I tried handing him cash he slapped it out of my hand he slapped my hand so hard that two of the bills fell out then he said you need to pay at this machine slapping his hand hard on the machine I was upset at this point and embarrassed because I could feel the awkwardness in the air enter malicious compliance I was livid I decided hands still stinging I'm choosing today to stick up for myself I SLA SLA my money the way he slapped my hand directly on his machine I kept picking the machine up Scanner to look for a hole to put the cash into I tried flattening it bending it folding it whatever it took to shove this money into the machine then it finally happened the man lost his mind why did you not tell me it was Cash why why I could have argued I just stood there staring knowing he would spin himself into a tizzy he totally did but not in the way I could have expected he ripped my honey threw it in the air yelled and walked away pushing Barber's chairs that this is so fake it's so fake come on guys come on guys come on am I the jerk for wearing my wedding ring to my sister's wedding against her wishes and hijacking her night my sister 29 female got married last Saturday the ceremony was beautiful and I enjoyed myself as much as I could even though I don't like weddings The Dramatics were not quite as enjoyable i 27 male hadn't seen my family in a few months and we've only had a handful of phone calls over the course of these months it's never on purpose that I pull one of these disappearing AXS it's mostly out of habit I've been fiercely independent for most of my life and I get easily caught up in whatever I'm doing at the time that makes it hard for me to remember to keep those not in my direct line of sight in the loop my mother is the same way it's also nice visiting around times when big events like this are going on as my mom is prone to hovering when whenever I home and this takes some of the spotlight off of me I had been in Ireland around 8 months prior to flying in last Thursday I was originally there to spend two weeks with my best friend who thanks to the aformentioned one track mindness I possess I had unfortunately Grown Apart from within recent years ours was a friendship that had started when we were 14 and was one of the most important relationships in my life for over a decade and I wanted to put more effort into it so I didn't lose it he was spending time overseas as to reconnect with his hair Heritage since his father's passing I was already traveling and my stay obviously turned out to be a lot longer than 2 weeks it also turned into us getting married funny how life works out about 2 weeks before our trip to the states for my sister's wedding I sent out a mass email to close family letting them know that me and my husband were married I wanted to assuage any possibility of us stealing any thunder right from the GetGo my mom replied that she was hurt that she wasn't told sooner or allowed to be there which I understood it seemed her mood flipped by the time we met in person however rehearsal dinner was on Friday and that was where we all met up for the first time my mom was overjoyed to see me and my partner and spent a large part of the night telling stories about how she had always predicted there was something different about my friendship with him compared to others I was close with in high school it was a very sweet moment but at the end of the night my sister pulled me aside and asked if we could not wear our wedding rings to the ceremony I was confused so I asked why she she said I was taking the attention off of her and she was already bitter that I hijacked her rehearsal dinner more family might take notice if I wore my ring tomorrow and cause a similar incident I refused like I mentioned before the ceremony was beautiful but she didn't speak to me for the rest of the weekend and we ended up leaving the reception early am I the jerk you're the jerk you were married for 3 months and you chose to announce your marriage just 2 weeks before your sister's wedding then her rehearsal dinner became you and your spouse's debut not only as a couple but as a married couple I don't think people's lives should be on hold but I do think that when it comes to Milestone events like a wedding the guests of honor should have the entire Spotlight to themselves and people shouldn't take away from that you had to know that handling things this way was going to take attention away from your sister's big day you're the jerk normally asking someone not to wear their wedding ring would be a crazy request but I actually get where your sister's coming from you seem remarkably self-centered and thought thoughtless of the impact of your actions and behavior on others how can you not think that running off to Ireland getting married to someone you haven't seen for 14 years and then telling everyone 2 weeks beforehand despite being married for 4 months wouldn't steal her Thunder of course they are all going to be more interested in you because what you did was insane and so people will be wanting to talk about that I think you know it would and that's why you waited her request wasn't really the big problem but your overall behavior is you're the jerk you waited until 2 weeks before your sister's wedding to tell your family you secretly got married to your childhood best friend in an international trip Whirlwind romance 4 months ago the least you can do is redirect anyone who starts making her wedding about your new marriage plan your own reception dude why are people on Reddit so weird about weddings I don't know people take this stuff way too seriously like for someone to tell you don't wear your wedding ring to my event that's just crazy like how does this make sense to these people careful now Karen you know you're going to upset some of our viewers I just don't care anymore like I don't have any faith in humanity anymore neither do I Karen neither do I am I the jerk for considering giving more to my son than to my daughter and my will I as a 64-year-old man want to start off by stating that I currently have stage four lung cancer so I may not even have a year left to live now to start off my daughter who's 30 and Son who's 26 both ended up with very different paths in life like the rest of the women in our family my daughter wanted to go to medical school and study to become a Dermatologist since she wanted to have a successful job no matter what and that she loved studying about skin conditions as well that meant that she was willing to do whatever it took for getting scholarships and to working multiple jobs although I tried to help her pay her tuition as much as I could to make that happen so now she's currently working her dream job and making a very good living about $250,000 a year and very debt-free now which is something that I'm very proud of her for while my son decided to give up on going to further schooling just so he can help aid his sick mother when her health heavily declined from leukemia around the time our son was 14 and our daughter was 18 so in order to focus more on taking care of his now late mother and then me after I got lung cancer my son has completely focused on working only minimum wage jobs just so that he can have more time to care for us and even if I knew that he probably wanted to go to college and I told him to not worry about us my son was still so kind enough that he decided to focus more on us instead so that his sister wouldn't be burdened with doing so and simply because he loved us because I feel so grateful and responsible for him sacrificing so much for us I decided to let both of my kids know that when I pass my son is going to keep the house all the possessions that we have in the house including our car and 80% of whatever money that I have left and hopes that he could eventually use it to go to college if he wanted to and that my daughter can have the other 20% of the money because I wanted to leave her something but didn't think that she needed the money that much since she has a well-paying job for her to be left behind with many of her mother's possessions and whatever my son didn't want to inherit from me of course I did expect my daughter to be somewhat upset about this with her potentially believing that I'm favoring my son more than her despite me trying to explain that I'm simply trying to pay back my son for all of the help he gave to me and that I really don't favor him more than her however what I didn't expect is the rest of the family especially the women to call me as well as Bering me for acting like a jerk and saying that I was punishing my daughter for her success when I only simply wanted to give back to my son for helping me and my late wife am I the jerk and should I reconsider splitting the assets of my will 5050 before it's too late edit I wanted to start off by apologizing for not being able to respond before as I was tired after posting this but I feel like I should clarify some things first and I'm hoping Reddit will let me include this one my son didn't become an official full-time caregiver at the age of 14 although he did insist on helping out because he was very much worried about his mother and loved her dearly I was the main primary caregiver for my late wife and continued to do so up until her passing but my son was the one who was very kindhearted enough to want to help me and he even insisted on taking a full-time caregiving role and giving up on going to college after he graduated high school so yes he does have a high school diploma under his belt just because he wanted to help me juggle between taking care of of his mother and making sure that I can help provide whatever financial support I could to his sister two my wife was going on and off of her own Illness but ultimately passed 7 years ago a whole 2 years after my daughter got her BS of Health Science before going into med school and which my wife used to joke about how she only really lived longer than expected because she wasn't going to pass before she saw our daughter graduate and we really didn't expect her to graduate so soon I however was first officially diagnosed with Stage 2 lung cancer about about 6 years ago and despite medicine and even chemo things haven't been looking up for me when my son heard about my diagnosis he insisted again that he was willing to give up trying to go back to college and wanted to take care of me even if I told him that he didn't have to three as far as the possessions go I did try to divide it based on sentimental reasons first before anything else not the jerk I think your reasoning is sound but I wouldn't phrase it as paying him back for helping phrase it as because he put his life on hold to help and that he needs an extra leg up now this isn't about punishing her but helping make sure they both have a chance at a good life you are grateful and don't have to worry about her future but this is about giving you peace of mind regarding his perhaps try talking to her about what memory item she wants first since he's getting the bulk of valuable possessions not the jerk your son has put his life on hold for 12 years he's definitely going to need a bit of help getting back on track he's significantly behind his sister when when it comes to making decent wage 4 years of school 3 years of college at least before he'll be where she was 7 years ago at $250,000 a year he's well behind her financially you're not punishing your daughter for her success you're rewarding your son for his time and effort not the jerk if you feel 20% is less you could give her say 30% also has your daughter ever contributed to welfare of your late wife and now you additionally I think you need to also have a talk with your son regarding his plans because it seems that he was so busy and taking care of his parents that he forgot to live his life and with you gone in the near future as well so sorry regarding this it would be difficult for him to adjust bro the fact that she makes $250,000 a year yet she's upset about her brother getting more inheritance even though he makes minimum wage like I'm sorry but she sounds like a bad person I wouldn't leave her anything dude seriously yeah if I was her I'd be like give him everything I'm set I'm good he's the one who needs it am I the jerk for not upgrading my sister to a suite with the rest of our siblings this summer my siblings and I 32 female had the opportunity to take a vacation together something we've not been able to do in the past due to our time and scheduling conflicts as well as we're all busy with work school and family life there's five of us I'm the oldest and married and my younger brother 28 male had a week off of work that he asked us to help him plan something for we all decided to take an all-inclusive weeklong vac a that my younger sister who's 30 found a good deal for which was within all of our price range I'm sharing a room with one sibling my brothers are sharing another room and my younger sister who's 30 is in a room by herself all the planning and details went smoothly until I received an email last week that we were eligible to bid for an upgrade to a better room and Status the upgrade would include unlimited drinks and dining at all the restaurants not just the ones included with our original basic room package and access to the VIP lounges I ended up impulsively putting in a bid for myself and because I had done the booking for my younger brothers put a bid in for them as well to my surprise our bids were accepted immediately something I wasn't expecting I called my younger sister to tell her to place a bid for an upgrade as well and because it was expensive offered to pay for half of her upgrade it's been 2 days now and it doesn't look like her bid was accepted we called the resort and they said the status we were upgraded to has been officially booked her room level is now three grades below ours with a separate dining area separate amenities and it doesn't look like she'll be allowed in the VIP lounges we're in we've tried to think of ways to sneak her into our lounges and restaurants but she's acting like we left her behind and has become mopy and sad she's making sarcastic comments about keeping to herself in her poor person section and it's making everyone feel guilty the whole trip was initially her idea and I don't think it's anyone's problem but her own if she didn't get the upgrade like the rest of us I'm stressed now that this will ruin our vacation altogether am I the jerk here for upgrading to a nicer room edit you guys are ridiculous nothing I said should have been offensive I talked to my sister and she agreed that she wants us all to have a nice vacation and yes she's pouting constantly over fueling left out but we're all going in the same vacation she expressed that we should enjoy the amenities we paid for I told her we' try to include her and she could come to our rooms and enjoy the Butler Service and I'd order her any drink she wanted when when she was with us so that she wouldn't have to pay for them herself as the upgrades included unlimited drinks I should add that we're all adults and no one plans to spend every waking moment of a family vacation together I don't think it's okay for her to act so clingy all of a sudden when she was the first to suggest that she would be okay with a room to herself it's all of our vacation and not just hers for those asking I couldn't bid on her upgrade she had to do that herself because she paid for her own reservation on a separate account the rooms are a maximum of two people per room I didn't think we would get the upgrade as I bid the minimum amount for mine and my brother's rooms which brings me to the nature of placing a bid there's no guarantee that it will win I was caught by surprise when our bids were accepted and brought it up to my sister as soon as I found out we got in my sister is also usually on a budget and I didn't think she'd be interested in the upgrade anyway when I place the bids I had no way to know or predict that she would be down for it I think it's pretty crazy for everyone here to blow this out of proportion in this way unh might be a better word for individuals who can't put themselves in my shoes if you plan on doing activities and eating at places she won't be allowed then 100% you're the jerk you're the jerk hey guys I found this great Resort where we can all spend the week together cool we're going to get better rooms and avoid you at all meals and activities thanks for the trip wait why are you sad don't you realize you're ruining this for us call the resort explain the issue and pay to get your family member into your restaurant lounges and activities or forgo them it may not be included in her room but I don't know any Resort that will turn down business am I the jerk for not attending my graduation party and telling everyone why when they asked my family has not celebrated anything to do with me since I was 12 years old my dad and his new wife had a baby that year and I was kind of forgotten about I would get birthday presents and such but no party or anything I got used to it and started a tradition of celebrating with my friends we would go see movies or whatever one of my friends moms found out and started making me a cake every year for my birthday when I graduated from high school I had saved up enough money to go on a week-long vacation in New York City with my best friend and her mom to see hadestown I just finished University and I'm starting my new job right away I guess my dad had planned a big party for me as a surprise but I didn't show up because I went out with my friends instead when my family started asking me why I didn't show up after my father had gone through all the effort for me I explained that he hadn't celebrated anything of mine in 10 years and I didn't know he had planned to do so this time he told everyone I was lying so I asked him to post any pictures he had from my birthday parties extracurricular activities or high school graduation he obviously couldn't and everyone started crapping on him now he's mad for talking about private family matters I'm just going to go over there and pick up a few things I have left in that house and just move to my new City without dealing with this anymore am I the jerk not the jerk how dare you tell the truth about me being a horrible parent really people always call them private family matters when they know their behavior is indefensible definitely not the jerk you can't attend a party you didn't know about he's now mad because you called him out on his lies and proed to the family that he hasn't actually celebrated anything for you in years it makes him look bad obviously and that's what he's more mad about you do you good luck with your new job and your moon move am I the jerk for exposing my future sister-in-law for bullying me in high school at a family event in high school I used to be friends with this girl anakah we were close until junior year when I discovered she had been spreading false rumors about me however even after I stopped being friends with her she continued to make up lies about me and made my life horrible right until we graduated we went to different universities and I'm in my mid 20s now my older brother Carter went to the same University as anakah recently he announced that he had gotten engaged to his girlfriend our family was happy for him but we were surprised at the same time since we didn't know he was dating anyone he said he'd introduce her at an upcoming family party the party rolled around and guess who walked in the door with Carter anakah I honestly thought I was hallucinating and I felt sick seeing her again Carter left anakah with some relatives then came over to me and asked to talk we went to another room and Carter explained he had met anakah at a party and didn't recognize I her but it was love at first sight but after he found out her full name he realized it was the same anakah who spread lies about me he confronted her and she claimed to not remember me or anything she did he let it go because he really liked her he then pleaded with me to be nice to her since she didn't remember what she had done and that she was a good person I just told him I needed a moment to myself to process everything when I eventually went back to the party I decided I would ignore her I didn't say anything rude I just didn't talk to her or acknowledge her she didn't talk to me or acknowledge me either but when we sat down to eat all heck broke loose one of my aunts asked me how I felt about my brother getting married I tried changing the subject but she kept pressing so I eventually snapped and said something like I actually don't feel great about it considering his future wife bullied me and never apologized everyone turned to look at anakah she just started crying and ran out of the room Carter went after her and they left early the the rest of the night was chaotic because everyone was asking me what happened and I told them later Carter called me and said that I was a horrible person for embarrassing anakah in front of the whole family and I was being petty over High School drama he demanded I apologize to her I refused and said he was the awful one for blindsiding me with this and that if she never bothered to reach out and apologize for what she did while they were dating I wasn't going to let it go now that they're engaged he kept insisting that she didn't remember and she can't apolog olog for something she doesn't remember but I think that's BS I ended up hanging up on him the way I see it I was asked a direct question and I provided a direct answer also I don't think I have any obligation to cover for her when she made my life horrible especially when she's obviously lying about not remembering am I the jerk edit I can't believe I have to add this but random people are messaging me about privacy so I just want to say that the names in this story are fake I named anakah after a character in a movie and Carter after character in a book please calm down not the jerk I don't buy that she doesn't remember plus your brother did and chose to Ambush you at the family event her running out and crying is already showing manipulating signs not the jerk she should have apologized when she met your brother or even at the Gathering Karen demands to drive my car big mistake so a few years ago I bought the old car from my dad he bought a new one and mine was on its last wheel since I'm comfortable with that car and knew my dad was the only owner I bought it note I'm very stupid and thought he changed the title into my name but that never even happened it's not a pickup nor a van it's a minivan with a big trunk you can fit loads of stuff in there and even sleep in it if you're a smaller sized person like myself anyway since I still live at home they use my car like it still belongs to them I've told them many times that I don't like how they use it but they'll get mad and say I don't do anything and can at least lend them my car sometimes they ask sometimes they just take the car and I can't even go to my friend's house like we planned when I say no they'll get passive aggressive and start guil tripping me after everything we've done for you if my sibling or a friend needs larger stuff moved like a shelf or something they use my car bought new tires a fridge a washing machine they use my car my sibling and their drunk friends need to get picked up from a party they use my car because it can fit six people doesn't matter that they called it ugly before and would never even drive it if there's Garden ways to dispose which car do they use exactly mine they try not to make it dirty but it still gets dirty but what bothers me the most is that afterwards it stinks like manure and it has insects in it I pay for gas insurance and all the other stuff my dad does repairs but so does he on every other car of my mom or siblings and I have course pay for the parts and give him money but it's still not my car I'm very attached to my belongings and I treat treat them well it doesn't matter what it is since I was a kid my parents always forced cheering on me wouldn't mind letting my sibling or cousin play with my toys if it was my decision but getting the toy ripped straight out of my hands and I wasn't allowed to complain because they would say how selfish I am and then getting a destroyed toy back is frustrating this car is my biggest and most expensive belonging it's an older model without much technology in it and I like it that way I don't want a different car so I try to treat it well so I can have it longer yeah I'm sentimental about it today I had enough the following story broke me and I started crying my aunt called and demanded that my mom drive her with my car to help her with a carpet my mom asks me I say no my aunt gets all upset and angry why first of all Aunt has a car but it's currently under repair she knew about the carpet since 2 weeks ago but suddenly it's important to her when the car is at repair second the carpet isn't that big it comes in pieces that fit in a regular car third they have more cars than the one that gets repaired also they have a trailer they kept pressuring me and I couldn't anymore I started crying why is it always my car why can't I have that one thing my sibling gets to have two cars in their name and no one uses their cars I said if I ever buy another car I'm going to get the tiniest car on the market so that they can't exploit me and use it despite the fact that I feel unsafe in such small cars my mom just stood there watching me cry I love my car but I hate the shared crap so much if my dad sold the car to a stranger they wouldn't access it anymore but this is different because family I'm so done cut your losses buy a different car by yourself cancel insurance on the car that is still in your dad's name tell them what you did do not renew the license on it since it's in his name sooner or later they will get caught driving without insurance or proper licensing gas they have to buy it maintenance it's in your dad's name so it's not yours to deal with don't let anyone borrow your next car and keep the keys with you at all times if they do somehow take your car call it in as stolen they're simply taking advantage of you time to cut those strings you are the adult here demand the money back tell them since the car isn't in your name that you didn't actually buy the car so they essentially stole money from you also newer smaller cars might not make you feel safer but in an accident you are safer than in older cars they are designed to crumble and spread the force of the impact away from the people inside the car where older vehicles don't do that at all or are not as good at doing that am I the jerk for leaving the restaurant because of what my husband did I would like to start and say that my female 29 husband male 35 comes from a well-off family and most of his friends are well-off too unlike me and my family we come from Humble working class and we don't own a lot of assets like my in-law's do my husband cares about appearances at first he didn't care how I dressed but he did buy me things that he said I would love but nothing was my style really after marriage he sat down with me and told me that I 100% get to choose how I look except when I'm with him or his family and introduced me to Brands to choose my new clothes from and I started wearing them whenever I'm with his family and friends although it limited my choice on what to wear because I'm more into simple things for his friend's birthday that was celebrated at an upscale restaurant my husband bought me a $300 dress to wear for the occasion but I didn't like many things about it I told him i' just wear my $60 floral maxi dress he didn't think this was a good idea and said that I didn't have a choice in the matter I said I either wear the dress or I don't go he said fine then whatever but still wasn't happy we got to the restaurant and no one said anything about my dress except his other friend who said I looked great after dinner my husband moved quickly and Spilled wine all over me he freaked out and said that he thankfully had a replacement then pulled out the $300 dress he previously wanted me to wear from a bag this whole time I couldn't help but think he deliberately spilled the wine on my floral dress to force me into wearing the other one he handed me the dress and told me to go change I got up but instead of going to the restroom I made my way to the door he asked me to wait but I kept walking while opening my phone to get an Uber to get me home I stood outside and started arguing with him he said he didn't get why I was behaving like this and embarrassing both him and myself like that I said that he looked down on my dress and tried to trick me into wearing what he wanted me to by spilling wine on me he told me to go back inside but I said I won't move until my Uber arrives he threw a fit calling me in embarrassment and stood there until I left at home he went off on me saying I could have worn the dress and not made a scene and then doubled down and walked out again I said he disrespected my choices and implied I was an embarrassment he said he was just calling a spade a spade and I should quit acting so insensitive and getting offended over nothing he said I made a joke out of him in front of his friends and one of them the one who complimented my dress and the one who constantly tries to video chat with me whenever he sees me online tried to call me but I didn't respond because he made me uncomfortable am I the jerk did I handle this right red flags not the jerk but what on Earth to just be sitting on a spare dress through a whole dinner that's unhinged Karen uses me for free babysitting ends up regretting it I 23 female used to be very close with my family my siblings have kids and I used to be a big part of their life I'm always taking good care of them on my free time I never do anything for myself I spend it always with them because I love them I always go above and beyond for them not to mention I spent lots of money on them I'm the aunt that never said no my siblings have more money than me but all my money seems to go to their kids now this is not my siblings fault it's just what I choose to do I love them like my own and I never felt like I was being used by my siblings to be a free babysitter because I truly enjoyed it from my heart I don't have friends of my own I considered my siblings to be my friends however a year ago I had a terrible injury and I couldn't walk or use my hands for 6 months I went from being the girl that helped everyone out to being unable to help myself I couldn't walk to the bathroom kitchen anywhere for the first months of my injury I lost 30 lb and I was severely skinny I lost all that weight due to being unable to cook for myself there were times I needed help even using my spoon I needed to be fed no one helped me there were times I literally cut my hair off because I no longer could take care of my long thick hair there were times I couldn't take showers it was the most depressing time of my life I I went from dealing with my injury to dealing with all kinds of problems due to not taking care of myself not eating properly Etc fast forward after months of suffering and struggling I was able to slowly heal I was very mad at my family when I finally healed I realized they used to call me every day before my injury because they could use me as a babysitter but during my injury they acted as if I didn't even exist there were no phone calls no checking up on me to see if I needed anything nothing I did have high expectations from them because we were very close family I was there for them through anything but I didn't receive the same love back the other day my sister called me to say her kids miss me and to come babysit them I said no that's the first time I've ever said no to her why is she calling me now that I'm recovered when she didn't even show up for me during the worst times of my life she said it's because I never told them I needed help now they know exactly what I was going through they knew I couldn't walk they knew I couldn't use my hands they saw me with their own eyes first day of my injury at the hospital then completely disappeared on me I feel I'm only good enough when I'm helping them but when I'm unable to do anything I'm unwanted I'm going to be all alone but I decided to cut my siblings out of my life permanently I will no longer be watching their kids for them I'll let them know this and I've changed my number they think it's evil to do this to your family what do you guys think am I the jerk not the jerk every relationship must be a two-way street it sounds like your siblings only want you when they need you for something I just feel terrible reading your post you can still be a great ant when you can and want to but you don't have to say yes every time to be a great ant not the jerk the only evil people are the ones that up and disappeared when you needed them did they ever ask you if you need anything to just let them know good for you op for recognizing your worth I'm truly sorry this happened to you am I the jerk for ruining a family dinner I'm known in the family to be a control freak about preparing food in fact in my family there are two dinners in the year that all members come for 30 people and before I took over all dinners were extremely late there were always problems with seasoning or poor prepation I'm organized and for every meal I have a spreadsheet with everything I need to make a huge scale dinner at first they didn't respected but after seeing that my method was useful everyone joined in and allowed me to be the head of the organization since then dinners are ready on time everyone praises and repeats the dish not very common it takes one to two days to prepare the meal I don't ask them to help because I know I'm serious with organization but if the person wants to I ask them to respect the process another fact my mother was a cook for one year and my sister-in-law is studying Gastronomy the situation Sunday was one of our yearly dinners and I was the head as usual my sister-in-law my mother my aunt and uncle would help me this would be my sister-in-law's first family dinner and she offered to help during the preparation my mother started to do several things wrong and every time I said something she said something like stay calm a wrong thing will not lead to anything the problem is that she did so much wrong skipping so many necessary steps in the food that most things I had to redo or give a second look she continued to help even though I said it wasn't necessary I broke down when I just commented something about steps with my sister in-law and she corrected me I was going to comment but my mother said I think you better cool off in the pool and let those with experience sort it out I accepted grabbed a glass of wine the spreadsheet with me and spent the whole day in the pool ignoring when they asked me to come back so dinner was late poorly seasoned undercooked and no one had a second dish my mother later said that I ruined dinner and humiliated our family in front of relatives in Revenge I shouldn't take that serious because it was a silly family joke by the way I love making these dinners and yes my mother and sister-in-law's behavior is common am I the jerk someone asked for examples of what she did wrong she put too much salt on one of the meats and it was inedible there had to be 10 of something for the food and she cut it in half because it was too much it wasn't she started to make rice very early and we used the pan first for other food and the rice is last because it's the biggest and heaviest pan my spreadsheet basically has the amounts and how long each cooking ingredient goes I point out when they can get the quantities wrong too much or too little or when they start making food that is for a long time before or after not the jerk you did exactly what your mother suggested you should in her rude way good for you for having a nice day in the pool the last person who gets to complain is her not the jerk the mom kicked op out of the kitchen because she was trying to impress her new daughter-in-law then when it went wrong she blamed op instead of taking respons responsibility I half think Mom was low-key bullying op to impress her new guests am I the jerk for telling my sister it's her own fault she's alienated from the family I'm one of three siblings 29 female 27 female me and 22 male this all started about 5 years ago when my older sister came to me and told me she was looking into our genealogy and she wanted me to do one of those novelty genetic tests I wasn't enthusiastic about it but she was weirdly insistent so I gave gave her the sample she asked for and moved on not really giving it much more thought at no point did I have a digital login for any results I also never thought to mention this to my parents a few months after this sister moved 6 hours away for another job and was non-communicative she would call dad every once in a while but brother and I found that if we didn't call or text her first we wouldn't hear from her and she basically cut mom off outright when questioned about this she would refuse to acknowledge that's what she was doing ultimately we all just accepted it mom was totally baffled and brokenhearted and the rest of us naturally became Less close with sister as a result even she and dad only talk a few times a year now and none of us have seen her in person in 5 years earlier this year brother did a 23 and me and got weird results that led to hard conversations mom and dad came clean that the three of us were donor conceived a choice they made because Dad is infertile they apologized for not telling us earlier but Dad felt strongly about not telling us because he never wanted us to think of him as any less than our dad dad called sister and told her this too after we talked and she basically had a breakdown on the phone it turns out she knew Dad wasn't her biological father and firmly believed for 5 years that mom had cheated on Dad and had been nursing intense resentments as a result apparently she did a genetics test 5 years ago and was puzzled that the ancestry info didn't match what we know about our dad's family that's when she came to me to get a sample she sent a to the lab with hers and they confirmed the results were genetic half siblings with the same mother and different fathers she Drew her own conclusions from there that Dad was my biological father and not hers and that mom had had an affair and uprooted her life to get a fresh start she's now Furious about the situation and feels like she's been robbed of the last 5 years when we last talked I was maybe less sympathetic than I should have been and I told her that cutting us off with no explanation was an insane move and if she had told us even fraction of what was going on it could have been cleared up years ago I acknowledged Mom and Dad messed up here by not being truthful about our genetic identities which I'm also struggling with my own feelings on but in the end it was her decision to do this dramatic move and slow Fade with zero explanation I also expressed how hurt brother and I had been to be left out of her life and that it wasn't fair to punish us for what she thought had happened am I the jerk not The Jerk by a mile you just wanted to comprehend what was was going on while your sister was being shady she also made that assumption that your mom cheated and while I'm sure your dad is a respectable guy it probably left your mom heartbroken to just feel cut off from her own kid like that you didn't even do anything that bad as a followup you just stated that it hurt you and your brother you're a good person just looking out for those around you keep being that good person your parents messed up this one this is all on them your sister could have blown it wide open and what if it was Affairs then the whole family would be a mess a wine owner freaked out over a corkage fee I've been a server for 6 years and I've seen my fair share of entitled people however one person has my blood boiling forever I had a man come into my restaurant and get takeout he then asked me to open a bottle of wine which I told him per company policy it would be a $20 corkage fee he told me this was sneaky BS and that I'm stealing from him I told him it was a normal business practice and he looked at me and said said I own this wine and I've never heard of this BS I said okay you still have to pay for it he responded by Rolling his eyes and telling me I don't know high class wine like his I gave him a free sample of a wine we have and he spat it back in his glass and rudely shoved it back when my 17-year-old host gave him his food he said here's your tip and threw a $1 bill in his face while he walked out giving him a gesture I was shocked by this and looked up their website and sure enough it was the owner himself that we had just interacted with months later we reive a shipment of their wine in and I told my manager about the encounter about this dude he then returned the wine and asked them to apologize we got a response from their vice president of the company he said owner is an important man in the community and you're a pathological liar who should be fired it makes no sense for a server to lie about an interaction and put their job on the line the VP said that I was definitely acting sneaky for not treating him with proper respect and not being a good server so we definitely just can't stand these people we also later found out that he owns a wine production company he also never bought his Winery his parents bought it for him so I know he's an entitled jerk so we've told all the other restaurant owners servers and bartenders in our area and anyone who loves wine the truth about this jerk the most expensive tip ever nearly 15 years ago I went to work for a company the intent was for me to complete a project in quality and then move over into program management but someone quit and I was asked to fill in as a customer quality engineer this meant that every month I traveled to customer sites did the first pass analysis of our defective products and got yelled at a lot it really sucked also worth mentioning our branch of the company was too small to use the corporate travel so for every trip I was scouring discount travel sites to find the cheapest flight hotel and car I was ridiculously vigorous and seeking best prices if the crappiest car was $32 a day and the not so crappy car was $34 a day I picked the $32 car just to save the company $2 a day one fine trip several months in was spectacularly awful not only did I have a truly terrible car the hotel was all new depths of yuck my shoes stuck to the carpet in my room and the security flipper thing on the door was plastic also it was in the worst part of town and I worried about my safety to the point that I ended up pulling that little couch over to block the door and sleeping on it adding to my misery I was sick I had some creeping crud that plugged my sinuses normally I'd have canceled the trip but the customer was in an uproar about our continued repeating defects and required someone to be there I made this trik every month and once during every trip I would eat at the local Outback Steakhouse it was a known quantity the people who worked there were great and it helped me to have that connection on this particular trip I made my way to the Outback for dinner and I was clearly sick and miserable and the workers took care of me they sat me next to the fireplace brought me tea and had the kitchen make me chicken noodle soup even though it wasn't on the menu I nearly cried I was so grateful my bill for dinner was less than $10 so I charged $20 yes more than a 100% tip but their kindness kept me going I got home did my expense report and turned it in my director called me into his office and screamed at me about how the corporate policy was 10% tip and how it should never exceed 15% and what was wrong with me for paying them so much remember total bill including the excessive tip was $20 it broke me well it shattered my loyalty to the company's bottom line so I made them give me the corporate travel policy where the tip policy was outlined and from that moment on I followed the corporate travel policy exactly no more crappy $32 a day cars I'm in midsize or better no no more flying out at 4:00 a.m. in the center seat the flights fit my schedule and I set where I wanted no more scary hotels in the worst part of town now I'm staying at the nicest Executive Hotel Allowed by the policy the cost of my trips were pretty regularly double or triple what they had been before adding up to thousands of dollars a year but I never disobeyed their allowable tip policy again the true irony the corporate tip policy actually had verbiage that said exceptional service could be recognized with an additional grat but basically don't make a habit of it also the allowable per DM was $50 a day and a receipt was only required if over that amount so the tip that started the whole thing was within per DM allowable for exceptional service and the receipt for it had not been necessary am I the jerk for telling my brother he'll probably end up bitter and alone I 22 male have a brother who's 27 and a sister who's 29 my brother didn't have an easy childhood he was bullied at school and the other kids kids told teachers that he was an instigator they believed them and my parents believed the teachers as a result my brother grew up quite isolated and anger became his main defense mechanism he tends to fly off the handle quickly and lashes out at any and everyone we never had a close relationship growing up but we bonded as we got older over how our childhood affected us all sister as the eldest felt copious amounts of pressure to be perfect and I as the youngest pretty much raised myself our parents have since apologized but to be care they grew up thinking financially providing for your kids was all they needed to do they didn't know where they were going wrong at the time and we were too young to articulate how we felt we've had several open conversations about it since they've apologized and we've been a United friend for the last four or 5 years minus some hiccups we were at our parents house over the weekend and my brother left a plate on the side after my mom had just done the dishes my sister told my bro not to leave it he got defensive and they started arguing it was petty back and forth normal sibling stuff until my brother hit below the belt and said he doesn't know why she's so pressed about a plate anyway she has bigger things going on in her house to worry about for context her and her husband have had money troubles and recently borrowed money from us to cover their morgage sister didn't say anything just started crying I stepped in and told him he had gone too far he needs to learn to control his anger because all he ever does when faced with any minor conflict is to go for the jugular and no one with any self respect will stay around him he's never been able to hold a relationship girlfriends or friends I went on a Spiel and ended by saying his rough childhood doesn't give him license to be an insufferable jerk who will probably end up bitter and alone my dad and sister agree and think though harsh it's something he needed to hear but my mom thinks I was out of line we've spoken about therapy before had many heart to Hearts but he's firmly against therapy and just doesn't change to be honest I love him but it's exhausting being around him sometimes I thought tough love would help but he's blocked me on everything so I think I may have gone too far am I the jerk everyone sucks here he's the jerk for going for the jugular over a minor matter you're the jerk for also going for the jugular with your end up bitter and alone talk everyone sucks here he shouldn't have said what he said it was uncalled for equally while it's a conversation that needed to be had the way you worded it in the moment was cruel explaining to him kindly that you concerned he's pushing people away and offering to support him to find help would have been the right way to handle it well who do you think is the jerk op or his brother please let us know wait is this really so out of the ordinary I thought all families talk to each other like this am I the jerk for choosing to move across the country to be with my daughter leaving my son and grandkids behind my wife passed and I've been a little lost in my life since my daughter Angie moved to Colorado for college and made a life for herself she and her husband are looking to buy their first home and their budget is essentially the most fixer upper of all time my son-in-law is a great kid but he is no handyman Angie is a natural at this sort of thing though I came up with the idea that I could move out to Colorado and help them fix up a home if they buy one they immediately agreed I've always been drawn to the Southwest but more than that growing up Angie who's now 36 was a very troubled young woman I also worked the night shift for most of her childhood so there were years where I felt I didn't really know her her moving to Colorado was the best thing she ever did she's a late bloomer but she's trying now I went to tell my son Eric who's 40 last week he was incredibly surprised and very hurt he and his wife have three kids who are all under five he's upset that I'm choosing his sister over the grandkids saying that they don't deserve to be discarded by their grandpa because his sister made a lot of bad choices and can't afford to take care of herself and that she had her chance at a childhood and it's it's their turn now and that I have to be the one to tell them that I don't want to live by them anymore I want to live by my daughter I told him that I was disappointed in his reaction and that he thinks that way of his sister at that point his wife got home and joined the pylon talking about how she shocked any grandparent would make this Choice Eric said that what is Angie more important than his kids and I said darn right she is she's my daughter he told me to leave so I did I really do have to wonder if I'm the here if my choice is really that shockingly bad edit I wanted to bring up a few things a lot of responses are going out of their way to create their own version of events and it's a little strange please feel free to ask questions about what did happen rather than writing your own stories Eric didn't suffer because of Angie's difficulties as a kid Angie is the one who suffered by not getting the attention or help she needed not the jerk you're a grown man you can choose where to live not to mention moving doesn't mean you won't be their grandpar parent or in their life anymore plenty of grandparents don't live in the same state as their grandkids and they still manage to maintain relationships generally speaking I wouldn't advise picking favorites among your family but they kind of pushed you into saying that your daughter is more important and honestly that sounds like a reasonable priority I'm going to sound like a jerk here probably but is there any chance you are currently helping them a lot with child care and their reaction might be based on that not the jerk I have two brothers and they each have kids I'm infertile my mom chooses them over me all the time because grandkids it's nice to see someone support someone without kids for a change people seem to forget that childless adults still deserve their parents' attention too even when they have grandkids info are you currently providing child care for your son op I spend time with the kids but I don't provide child care in any sense other than once in a while they'll spend the night at Grandpa's house not the jerk your choice of where to live is your choice full stop you do not owe your adult kids anything and your son taking this as she wins I lose is not your problem am I the jerk for telling my friend I don't like staying at her place because she sucks at hosting me 24 female and my friend 24 female live 4 hours apart we visited each other a couple of times over the last 2 to 3 years whenever she comes to my apartment I plan ahead asking in advance what she likes to eat stocking my fridge more than usual Etc then when she arrives I make it clear to her that she has free access to the kitchen and bathroom and to just ask if she needs anything depending how long she's staying I'll clear space for her in my closet I'm very mindful about making her feel welcome and at home especially because she can be really shy and doesn't like to feel like she's bothering anyone one time she forgot a towel and it took 2 days of her air drying in the bathroom before I figured out she didn't bring one and offered her one myself but when I stay at her place to put it bluntly she makes me feel like I'm bothering her as as much as she fears she might be bothering me like if I stay at her place for 3 Days she'll offer me food maybe once if I say I'm hungry or ask for food she tells me she doesn't really have much in the fridge I usually end up ordering in or she tells me I can go grocery shopping if I want it's just really weird to me to invite someone to your home and then tell them to go buy the food they'll be eating while they're there I'm not expecting a banquet but at least some acknowledgement that human beings need food would be nice other than that she just doesn't really Act like I'm there she'll suddenly disappear midday for a 3-hour nap and not even tell me or call someone else on the phone for hours just to chat she rarely plans anything for us to do together in her City usually if I don't want to spend my entire visit scrolling through my phone on her sofa I'm the one who has to organize the plans so one of our mutual friends who lives in her city is getting married soon and I booked a hotel my friend asked why don't just stay with her and I decided to be honest and told her that she's not a great host and she makes me feel unwelcome she seemed upset by this even though I don't really know how this could come as a shock considering I've mentioned how unwelcome I felt at her place more than once but I think she brushed it off in response she told me that she's dealing with money issues and work stress which I get but I told her that despite that it seems like she's not the type of person who's mindful about whether their guest is having a good time or not and I'd rather just have my own space she said I was insensitive and now things are strained between us I could have just not said anything but if my friend was unhappy with me I would want to know am I the jerk for expecting too much here am I the jerk not the jerk you are honest and instead of expecting her to change you made your own Arrangements if there is a strain on the relationship it will be coming from how your friend is interpreting your feedback maybe contact her and say something like listen I don't want you to feel bad about it people are different with different characters and behaviors you don't have to change yours so we stay friends I'm not mad that I'm not staying at your place it's just more more comfortable this way for me and I think it's also more comfortable for you when you feel less strained if you want we can try again am I the jerk for telling my sister why I'm acting cold during family dinner I 25 female am the middle kid in our family of three siblings Allison 28 Jake who's 22 sadly I'm the stereotypical unseen middle child while Allison is The Golden Child she literally cannot do anything wrong based on my parents opinion I opened up a new bakery in our town my mom invites the whole family for dinner once in a while and this time she said the dinner was in my honor to celebrate my new job which was sweet and I was pleasantly surprised Allison lives in a different city when she came home for dinner she was not alone she had her girlfriend Elizabeth who's 30 with her now Allison gets a lot of hookups and she uses her law degree to get these hookups even on my friends back in the day but she never brought her girlfriends home she did this time and everyone's attention was on her through the whole dinner there was only one mention of my bakery ironically it was from Elizabeth the rest was spent on getting to know Elizabeth and her job interests how she met Allison Etc it also didn't help that she was a psychiatrist and everyone had questions I was beyond upset she could have brought her home any other time but chose this one time that our parents decided to acknowledge me so I was cold throughout the dinner not that anyone really cared at the end of the night Allison asked me why I was suking I told her the truth and I said she managed to make this about herself as well that she couldn't live if the spotlight wasn't on her she told me I should be happy for her because she's fallen in love and is extremely happy with her girlfriend and wanted her to be a part of this celebration she knew exactly what bringing a girlfriend would do to this dinner so I told her she could have done it literally any other night right now we're still pretty distant am I the jerk here am I overreacting your parents are the jerks here if that's the dynamic they've created and perpetuated I'm sure Allison has never even considered that the spotlight is always on her not the jerk it was insensitive and I agree with you with her being wrong because she should have checked with you if it was okay it was your celebration not hers it wasn't about her having to be in love it was about your new job it's normal to feel guilt when you've been unseen your whole life and with what your sister said she made it seem like you were selfish which you weren't info how often does your mom host these dinners and how often does your sister come home from for them because if this is a regular event like every few months done nominally this time to honor you that's very different than a rare event specifically held for you more akin to a graduation dinner and if your sister lives an hour away and can get home frequently that's very different than living 8 Hour plane ride away op my mom hosts these dinners three times a year this time it was nominally done for me my sister lives on the other side of the country different coast and is pretty far away she used to visit very often when she was in school but now that she's become a lawyer she visits us twice a year once for Christmas and once for any of these three dinners that Mom hosts in your post you said she could have introduced her girlfriend literally any other night yet she only comes to these dinners once a year I understand op is feeling hurt by things in the past but she literally lives in the same town as her mom and is shocked when the daughter that lives on the other side of the country and only comes by three times a year gets more attention at the family dinner if op wasn't claiming that her sister was The Golden Child and op was neglected I would have instantly thought op as being unreasonable and Petty yeah I think op's feelings about this situation are colored by the family Dynamic growing up and that's very understandable but it's causing her to read into things too much and see this situation as an extension of that history her sister and parents also understandably don't understand why she's upset because they're looking at this situation specifically and not op's emotional baggage related to the history when you take away the context all Allison did was bring her girlfriend to her annual family dinner that's a 100% normal thing that people do at family dinners she's not at fault for taking her when there was Zero reason to expect it might create a problem op says she knew what bringing a girlfriend would do to a dinner I highly doubt she did the economy of attention at a family dinner and how bringing a significant other to said dinner might upset the balance is just not a thing in most people's minds my sister's kids destroyed my apartment I finally gave her a piece of my mind I 23 female live on my own I'm single and never plan on getting married or having any kids my sister Rose who's 29 is married and has two kids twins Ava and Zoe who are eight I'll be the first to say that her kids are brats they're nothing but spoiled and expect everyone to drop everything to help them Rose and her husband James have no self-control and when their kids throw a tantrum they'll immediately be given whatever it is they want to to see two 8-year-olds boss around their parents is nothing but sad and pathetic since they're the only kids in the family everyone practically worships them and never sees how bad they really are it was my birthday recently and I invited everyone over to my apartment to celebrate when planning it I mentioned that I was inviting a few of my friends too and since there would be alcohol I would feel more comfortable with it being a child-free event everyone agreed well on the evening she had to turn up late and with the kids I told her to leave and come back when she found someone to look after them but James and my parents both told me I was being too serious and that it was a party for all of us to enjoy they didn't even care that it was my birthday or my apartment or my rules in the 30 minutes Ava and Zoe were there they smashed a plate put their handprints all over my glass windows got hurt after they opened the oven after I explicitly told them not to and they threw a tantum because I didn't have pretzels and refused to leave my own party to walk to the shops and buy some the final fin straw was when they picked up a glass of wine somebody had left on the counter and they took it into my room where they promptly spilled red wine all over my white sheets I pulled James and Rose into my room and told them they need to leave right now before I made them pay for all of the damages Rose told me that they were just kids and didn't mean to I told her it was her fault for the way her kids turned out and that she raised them to be spoiled brats she called me a selfish jerk before grabbing her kids and they all walked out I haven't spoken to her or James since then and while my parents think she shouldn't have said that they told me it's still my fault for not planning a party that accommodated for her kids I don't think I should have to change my own lifestyle to support her own choices and I think I'm the one who's owed money for the damages and an apology so am I the jerk not the jerk they're just kids yeah kids who haven't taught to behave and respect other people's property and I want them around about as much as a dog who's not house broken not the jerk but make them pay for the damage anyway it sounds like they're not just the kids but the parents that need consequences or they'll never learn do this next tap here on your screen to come see our new podcast playlist where you'll find thousands of hours of the best stories you've ever heard or tap the one on the right that episode is specifically just for you based on other videos you've enjoyed the most

Channel: r/mr redder

Views: 89,344

Keywords: reddit, entitled people, r/entitledpeople, entitled peoples stories, r/entitledparents rslash, entitled, reddit funny stories, rslash entitled people, entitled people top post, funny karen stories, karen story, entitled stories, entitled karen, entitled people reddit, reddit entitled people, entitled mom, entitled mom stories, entitled parents, horrible karen stories, karen freakouts, r/, karen freaks out, hoa, reddit podcast, aita reddit stories podcast, reddit podcast stories

Id: WepvQwx1meQ

Length: 200min 5sec (12005 seconds)

Published: Thu Oct 12 2023