Justin Bieber Hates Us (Confirmed) - The TryPod Ep. 53

ramble you also took the name Steves why I was in slavery Stephen I like I'm on board first of all you're Steve I'm Stephen and actually Stephens my last name my first name is slippery Wow Oh I've really been enjoying this room function of renaming I don't feel that people are using it quite enough yeah yeah Zak do you want to introduce this one I think I just did I think that we're already in it miles this week we're not doing an introduction you're already listening to the tripod oh and Ned has just sneekly to move the box behind them I think Ned you should be sneaky Stephen sneaky Stephen maybe sneak sneaky sneaky Steve oh we have a Stevie B guys we have nice - well we're doing zoom as you know and on zoom you can rename yourself and so we're having fun with it this is the tripod you've got my boy Steve hammers hot dog hey was that hahaha you've cut sneaky stevis let Evan tap keep sneaking y'all you see what kind of Eugene what kind of Steve do you wanna be oh I'm a sexy Sven that's the name of my sourdough starter say hello to the world's sexiest pen a low I'm your other friend slippery Steven and of course we are joined as always by sniffling miles that's me sniffles no wow look at that today on the tripod we're gonna go through a menagerie of topics we're gonna do some top - any countdown my menagerie [ __ ] collection just gonna yield the floor what do you guys want to talk about you know we just came off the weekend yeah which the weekend doesn't really mean too much anymore but it does you know now it's shaping into like okay on Friday and Saturday I'm more likely to have tsums with all my friends and like do something we did a Passover Seder on Friday I didn't invite Zach that was a mistake that was it oops yeah you know I don't know why it's not Jewish but he used to host a Passover Seder for years and it's become my Passover Seder and I've spoken very highly your friend Brian hosts it he wrote runs a hell of a Passover and I told Meg I'm like hey you know it's a bummer that we're not doing Passover this year it's one it's the only Jewish holiday that I really look forward to but my family doesn't really do one and of course everyone's apart this year but then on on what was it Friday night yeah ride a night I go in to play Catan with Ned and some of our other co-workers late night Catan night and I'm like you know what guys I've got the zoom I've got the company zoom I'll send out the invite huh that's weird the zooms already being used what's that that's weird there's a Passover Seder on the calendar it could possibly be doing it how was it Keith but it was fun so I wanted I thought about you know inviting you but I didn't think to invite you into like Friday day and I was like he's not gonna be able to have matzo ball soup he's not gonna be able to have matzo he's not gonna have any of the stuff he needs I and in my mind I just thought like oh I just I don't know why I made that decision but I just thought well it's too complicated and then I also saw like you never was asking people about Catan like the house actually think it's an eye he probably won't care he won't miss it you have always spoken how much you liked it you brought over the Rugrats Passover as a boy exact did have a great time in Catan I mean shout out to Zach corn Diddy aka Gloria who in one single turn pulled off one of the greatest hand moves I've ever seen going from five victory points capturing largest army and Loch Ness Road in a single turn and revealing an unplayed victory point oh wow crazy Wow very exciting and we've really impressive an online portal that assigns you names but you can't change your name so I yes I was Gloria all night and I was just taking on this alter ego where I was just this very sweet old woman in the chat very polite everyone yet just totally unforgiving one more thing about Passover and yes that that we didn't have matzah right but the stories were all out when we had gone but mots is like the eat it's literally the easiest bread it's the bread when you can't make bread and I don't know why more people just don't make their own matzah it's unbelievably simple it's way more delicious because you get to oil it in salt it how you please and they're just great crackers if you make too many you can just have crackers in your house I've I made just flour and water it's flour and water and there is something else in it salt obviously it's all yeah I think that's it and it you just roll it you basically make the dough you roll it out as thin as you possibly can you let it sit you roll it out even thinner and then you put it on a preheated baking rack on the top of your oven at like a very high heat and like you flip it it gets two minutes per sides and it's done Oh fantastic it is interesting that Passover and Easter are so close to each other because the main difference in our bread is that yours has risen exactly you don't have Christ you know you know the Last Supper is a seder Wow he added in he added in the this is my body and this is the he adds in the the real bread and the and the making them wine about him instead of the wine about the struggles of their people beforehand because normally you drink the wine and you pour out some wine for each each you know thing the I love the and I feel like now I'm pretty good at speaking Americanized Hebrew when it's written phonetically oh really wait a co so taste Baruch ha ha Adonai elohenu melech ha'olam that's one of the things and my favorite word is hug often Oh what a word a Goffin toda raba my friend i don't know where's me on this night we are some nights we only eat this way why this night do we do both I love it it's it's great it's fun for the whole family are you more Jewish than Zach now uh no sirree I'm maybe this year but that was more Hebrew Hebrew in that moment than I've ever heard Zach I've never heard speak Hebrew never seen him do a seder dinner yeah no I was gonna say you brought it up in the Easter egg hunt video but we haven't done any Jewish things we should do a seder as a video and also we should enact like recreate just the way that the Rugrats special does all the things so like with dolls and stuff we should make the place we should make like it says oh yeah amazing story it's fun it's a fun one and it ends in victory kind of they end up you know they're wandering through the desert they win and then they're stuck in the desert for 40 years but other than that I'm just an affair reenacting the Rugrats Seder speaking of satyrs you guys have any big Easter plans eggs chocolate rabbits you know Easter was yesterday happened right I know did you have it oh did you people usually say that yeah are for the future just say did you do anything fun for Easter what do you did you have like if I did have plans but you know what miles my plans didn't come to fruition oh yeah it was rainy so I didn't do egg hunt we at gave Wes an Easter basket then we played inside and we had Easter fun time dance party on the inside so Wes is sniff favorite song is yummy by Justin Bieber excuse me he is too and all the foods he eats are yummy therefore he loves it this is like yummy yummy yummy tummy and we're like ok we'll play this and he just jumps around and dances we had to cut out the music in the last vlog but that's what we were dancing to and he liked it it's now by request and he'll he'll try and say like hey Google Play yummy by Justin Bieber but it he doesn't quite get it all the way I think Bieber might be the first popstar name that he said yeah Wow get if you can get that clean there's a brand deal right there what's that yeah right if you can get Wes clean saying hey Google Play yummy by Justin Bieber that's like to add spots right there wow dude okay it makes me a little comfortable uncomfortable now that it's like a ad thing it was cute now mad read think of it as an investment in his future that's true college fund God also Yummy's about you know yeah I know what it's about but you know if you just kind of ignore that it's a very cute song for it to what it what is it about I don't know that this song that his son is singing what is it about Zach yeah everyone knows was about is about is it about what's yummy what is yummy referring to is it is it kissing or is it no no you know what you know what you guys let's let's just move on like you guys made it weird I was telling a cute story and then everyone like trying to make it gross obviously doesn't understand any of that here's a clue guys here's a question is is Justin Bieber good like Mina's music good or zero person no is he good is he universally good is he is music good is he good do we like him well considering that Jay Biebs is one of my closest and dearest oldest friends I'm gonna take myself out of this conversation yeah for sure obviously I mean before I've said some disparaging things about him before I found out he has Lyme disease oh yes something bad and then I felt bad I I don't love is music that much I likes I mean there are songs that I've liked there were some of his music was you know a theme of the summer because I could not hear it anywhere that I would say his music is a neutral good but his personality's a chaotic evil I mean that one album is is nothing but his yeah you know I'm realizing guys I got a Bieber story but I never drop a pod I I actually in fact I have definitive proof that mr. Beebe's listened to this podcast no definitive is your proof story I'm gonna take you back to yesteryear before grief is a story before the corona what okay I got invited to the Justin Bieber premiere of his movie for YouTube of rejection was a series I think we all got invited but I was the only one who went which means that I got invited and I thought it would be very funny I thought it would be like wow what a stupid event to say that I got to go to also I'll get to get on that red carpet and I'm gonna take some pics and I'm gonna like get get my Getty photo game up cuz I I say no to all those events I don't do them and then every now and then I see you guys go to him and you get those like fun nice photos and I'm like you know what I want do that so I get to the event it's held in in Westwood at one of those theaters in downtown right by UCLA and I get there there's a special sign in you feel very exclusive when you go to one of these events because there are these barricades and there are a whole bunch of Bieber fans clamor and screaming saying hello and I get my own little walkway and I go through the male detector me and Maggie got dressed up we looked all cute and I get to the end and there are these three people there and their job is to sign in people who are gonna walk the red carpet so I say hello but it's clear that they don't maybe know who I am and they didn't care to ask and there were a lot of people that they were like just Bieber's friends so they're like do you want to walk the red carpet I'm like well yeah you guys asked me to like that was the emails do you want to come and walk the red carpet it wasn't it's partially ego but like I was doing it to be taking a photo and then I could put it on my Instagram and promote this this series so but they don't hold normally what you do when you walk a red carpet yeah he's someone's on the side and they have a white erase board and they write the person's name and where they're from so I expect this to happen I walk on the red carpet I turn no one's holding the board up and as a result the photographers just look up and they look down and no one takes a single photo of me sort of standing there on the red carpet absolutely mortifying and I'm like what do I do do I ask them do I go back and say hi I'm a I'm an important man do I go to the photographers and say would anybody like to take my soul I looked at Maggie and I'm like what dude she's like I'll take a picture you don't like that so she takes a photo on her phone but because it's nighttime and we don't have flashes it doesn't look very good and then one of the fans across the barricade say hey Zac and I kind of sheepishly wave and then one person from YouTube with like a digital camcorder it snaps one little photo of me and I get off and you know what this was Optimus after we had our apologies to Justin Bieber episode and I think he listened and he set me up oh my god it was genuinely one of the most mortifying things that's ever happened to me that sounds awful long Yeti photos to see if I can find this single single singular photo yeah and it was rough so yeah Bieber and I we haven't talked since that night which has been tough on me I was thinking like the bouncers were gonna be like yeah we have you as Zach Kornfeld from the tripod right no they had they didn't have me at all and then Patrick Starr got there right after me and and got a flurry of photos taken it was also more beautiful don't look I don't I get it it's fine yeah yeah but it was mortifying if some of my Patrick's art shows up and you don't know who they are like it's clear you should take a picture of them say well that person's here for pictures that that person looks amazing look wow I gotta take pictures of this person I don't know who they are but they look right in their defense I look more like someone's manager and or childhood friend who got an invite Eugene you've got a lot of those events and you get your beautiful photos taken what's what's the protocol where did I [ __ ] up no I I really haven't done any of those events I go to I guess most of the events you've seen photos I've been at are either queerer Asian oriented so they know I'm coming they know I'm coming they know I'm there I wasn't in I was invited I was an esteemed guest of mr. Justin Bieber Zach I can't relate [Laughter] I love you man I think they made a mistake you were clearly on the list I think they just did you know we're not doing their job right they looked at me and they're like uh do you want to walk and I'm like yeah so no one with the white board asked you your name at the beginning of the red carpet they just asked me the person with the white board never knows who you are but they're always like right Ned Fullmer try guys normally for like when we're at events that like the streamys are things like people know who we are so someone will walk up and before we can answer someone's like there the track I step then we don't have to do anything and we get to walk and it's great we feel lofty but you know what this kind of thing we get invited but people don't know us but then I look on Instagram and I'm always jealous because people are getting invited to the Marvel movie premiere red carpets are getting invited to like bad [ __ ] Mike so jealous when I saw people invited to Star Wars premiere let's keep this Smosh beef going cuz though yeah yeah it invited to every premiere well to be fair I think we don't push our management to seek that out so a lot of those other youtubers there they kind of lean really heavily into those promotional things so I don't know maybe we should make a pact and see if you can get into the next movie red carpet in 2021 when we can do that again right yeah you had digital like red carpet from your home video idea we should do that buzz act I think I think to bring it to like earth for a lot of listeners red carpets like waiting for it is a lot like waiting in line for a club so if you're VIP at a club and you walk up it's very clear and they just uh sure you in but there's like I'd say 90% that people can get into the club they just don't know the protocol of what the club is they got the money out they know they're supposed to be there they don't know if they're on the list or not that's like every red carpet so it's a pretty awkward experience I think for for most people it's certainly nice when you're someone they're just like he's here get his name on the board get him on the carpet but yeah it's a lot like waiting for a club it's just it's the Justin Bieber premiere you would think I would at least be the top three most important people there its Bieber Scooter Braun and Zach Cornfeld maybe Haley Baldwin Haley Bieber third and then I'm a close fourth let me tell you every interview you'll ever do on the red carpet as a try guys so hi try guys this time for this video we're gonna see if you would like to try a cool mirror selfie mirror we have for Twitter okay which one of you try guys Ryan first okay okay now we walk down the line and do the same bit with the next 16 it is there anything you guys wouldn't try and then one of us mumbles well we already got prostate exams on camera so so how did you guys meet we've been together for six years who cares how we met maybe we should throw our own red carpet for a video and we can be each other's interviewers and we can usher Xango right to the front zach is oh yeah and let's invite Bieber and then just be like do you want to walk the digital carpet and he'll be like yeah and then we'll be like okay and then we'll take no photos see how it feels Justin yeah the best part about any of these events is always that they have pretty decent catering the streamys all of them hello Wesley come on in Wesley's got that yeah yeah Wes and I did the other day practice speaking into the microphone with headphones on and he loved it and he was like whoa boo boo boo boo boo I can hear myself we'll play the clip of it right now what do you have to say to the people oh yes you say hello you got it well of course obviously so yeah so we're working on West's podcast the exact favorite Justin Bieber songs guys I didn't sound them pretty cool and very nerdy this weekend let me tell you about it I partitioned my Mac laptop Oh Mac Windows oh right so I discovered that a bunch of my old college friends used to play the same game that I really loved in middle school that game is Age of vampires too if you haven't ever played it or heard about it it's a real-time strategy game where you'd like clicking little people and moving them around building little buildings and knights and castles and stuff but it's all like you know it's all like Middle Ages so you're a civilization from the Middle Ages like the Britons or the or the Franks or the Turks or the or the Huns and it's a it's all it's it's so fun I played it so much in middle school and in order I was like oh it's quarantine I got some time on my hands I want to play a new video game but the only way to play this since it came out in like 1999 is on Windows I don't have a Windows I have a Mac but what you can do is you can split your hard drive into two pieces and then you can either boot up in Mac or boot up in Windows so I'll install the copy of Windows on my computer download this game from steam and then boom I'm playing like this it looks lo-fi graphics game that I played in middle school and it just it took me back I mean I was getting like nostalgia chills the sound effects and them music it was all it was all great and we were able to like play online with you know with buddies super cool steam adventure densha i did so Becky really wanted to play rollercoaster tycoon she used to love it and so I was like okay well I'm sure we can get it on Steam or on something similar and play it like why wouldn't we be able to well I log on the steam and turns out that rollercoaster tycoon was last dated just long enough where the current Mac update can't play it it cannot be played however I have a 10 year old Mac laptop that I rarely use but it still works so I fired it up and the hilarious thing it was on an operating software that was too old to play rollercoaster tycoon so I had to update it to one that's still six years old update it just in that I had to get in that sweet spot so that I could download and have her play roller crush that tycoon and then she did and one of the first things she did is just create zach and Maggie and trap them in their own part of the park per my request my removing roller coaster tycoon you trap everybody after a fun ride jack up the bathroom prices nobody wants to come back but you clean up tortured you torture your friends and then she still hasn't done the thing where you make a roller coaster but you don't complete it right so that the car flies off and explodes that's the fun yeah I mean she's on and off as a tycoon now and she got in it and she like mastered it in like an hour is this all the game is and I'm pretty sure yeah Eugene do you have any idea what we're talking about can't relate I wasn't allowed to play video games so I don't know what this is but when you were a kid so you couldn't play video games were you reading were you playing outside barefoot with sticks and collecting bugs like what were you doing literally those two things he was doing Animal Crossing but he wasn't playing the game he was just actually catching bugs and going fishing aged vampires does have a civilization that's Koreans I have these cool like naval ships that are Turtles and shoot cannonballs out of an ounce that's actual Korean history they had a various naval warships called turtle ships yeah I just remembered in relation to collecting bugs in the south because in the south like that is something you would do you go there's so many bugs yeah we're like just going you go to the creek yeah the Greg you can find crawdaddies crops and find a big giggle stink bugs needles do you guys ever catch fire flies in a jar and like carried our oh yeah that's the craziest thing that exists that's like some Pandora avatars magic you ever smash them and have going no no you ever think about how it's pretty nice to be a hot bug you know I mean like there's clearly bugs that we find more attractive that we don't [ __ ] with like you catch a Firefly you let that Firefly go oh lady ladybug you you find a ladybug inside your house you worship it yeah but like a house why BAM splat spider BAM splash you ugly bugs close up you get a close-up Matt micro micro shot on that bug mmm they all look the same have you seen a ladybug mid-flight close-up they are monsters yes crazy yeah they have like so many things horrifying yeah there's shells open so their wings underneath their shells can flutter and then they have all their legs and their ugly little head out there if they're they're monsters y'all did y'all have katydids and walking-sticks yeah those are the bad yeah so katiedids are the ones that look like leaves and walking-sticks are literally like like branches so you could be like that you could have basically what looks like a stick on your shoulder and then you turn and it just starts moving oh that was some real Tim Burton [ __ ] that's cool yeah definitely those and praying mantises are like top three sexy bugs Katie did is beautiful but the sexiest bug so [ __ ] hot mm-hmm so hot and daddy longlegs you guys know the deal with praying mantises right when they don't when they done [ __ ] okay do they bite off the husband's head the ladies eat the husband's [ __ ] head for sustenance and I have on my old mini DV camcorder they were there my friend's house for whatever reason she would just get so many praying mantises in her house like like in the the crease of the door there was just one smushed because like they were everywhere it makes no sense they're an endangered species they were all over so she invites us over and two are dancing around her bedroom wall they're doing a mating dance and we're following it for you know over an hour and I'm like I got to go to bed I come back the next day and I find them making love and again I film it cuz I'm a creepy little kid but they're making love for like again 45 minutes go by and I'm like I cannot film this yummy anymore I come back the next maybe later in that day the next day the the husband's body is decapitated but his little praying mantis penis is still going even in death oh yeah the day keeps going and then like in a tree just beyond the the momma's watching his lifeless body still trying to hump the air nature's awful why evolutionarily they do that if is like they they need energy food and the male's purpose is done them yet I think you're exactly right the male has served his purpose and in this matriarchal society he is now worthless as it should be what's y'all's what's y'all's number-one scariest bug like the bug that if it showed up on your leg right now you would have a heart attack I hate those silver fishes fish that I just I don't like how they jump like grasshoppers and they crawl like centipedes something about the combination of those skills is really just yeah they can jump that there's some of them that can jump and Chicago has them a lot and they're actually they're like having spiders in your house they're actually good bugs they only eat the worst bugs but God God has not made an uglier bug than that thing it is just it the way it moves it's awful I hate that that disgusts me but it doesn't scare me like a wasp or a Hornet Hornet is probably mine being stung by a Hornet is the most shocking thing it is it's bat nightmare painful probably tarantula I mean that giant spider that's all hairy you know tarantulas like you can be cute too they could be cute little friendly the in between spiders are the ones you got to worry about it's not the big ol hairy mother like tarantulas you only encounter a tarantula when like some zookeeper brings it out and you go I guess that's true yeah it's the brown recluse what about you gene it's not a bug it's Ted Bundy its serial killers why it's a common I've always hated hated the idea of leeches oh yeah geez hate it because they got the body of a slug but they got the teeth they got the chompers of a predator so you come out of that river and you're just covered in these blood sucking little vile little [ __ ] blood putts like things that expand with blood it's just something about it's just and you actually got like covered in leeches because you went dipping in like a mud river right remind me Oh our first ever branded video and it was the end of the video I don't even think we were filming you just went to go cover yourself in mud yes for the thumbnail actually I'm going to this Creek cover your body and not even with zooming you just go was I think it was Thomas Tommy coin the coin the survivalist expert he was like I was like what's this feeling and he looks at me he goes Oh bud you got leeches on you and I was like [ __ ] [ __ ] and I was like I basically went to what was a leech nest and just smeared all these everybody oh I forgot about that were they attached were they like in your skin they were just they were like hanging off of me and biting me up at the mall down here he was peeling them off and they were like sticky yeah I was just like I just invited them to my hometown buffet we were like in the middle of nowhere so it wasn't like we could just get a giant hose and spray him off what do we choose do in the wild when they're not sucking on humans where do they suck on any other animals so any other mo bathing they probably like like squirrels or [ __ ] you know like anything yeah [ __ ] them yeah they're parasites they're you know they hook on to things and just live off of them I would agree that anything that sucks and inflates with blood is horrifying bingo when you find uh if you've ever seen on a dog a great it tick ray means that thing is like a blueberry it and oh it's so can't walk and if you pop it dear lord it is horrifying it is a nightmare and in the South you pick big old ticks off your dogs all the time and you're like Jesus y'all ever watched those um dodo videos they're on Twitter on YouTube dodo yeah yeah it's like inspiring stories about animals and quite a few involve rehabilitation of stray dogs and whenever they showed the makeover they like open the ear up and there's just a nest of like 20 fat blueberries I knew we were gonna get there once we start a conversation about gross things are gonna reach a limit yeah you know it ticks love your genitals no yeah just a bunch of little [ __ ] yeah yeah yummy yummy right like we've talked about this right we've all had a tick on our balls yeah yeah that'll have the nightmare it's very scary you guys know the country song I wanna check you for ticks I think so I think yeah I mean it's very likely that we've talked about ticks on the podcast before and you know that's just like you got a three southern boys here four southern boys with miles we all know about I'm sure there's some in New York but man they're vicious in the south that's something that's so different about living in Los Angeles is that there's no bugs yeah flies and mosquitoes and but not like compared to like Tennessee or Florida or West Virginia or Texas like you deafeningly loud that's in the south there's bugs always and they're screaming yeah they're you just walk in the woods and after it rains it's just screaming God cicadas are loud [ __ ] but even grasshoppers and like just in the South you go outside at night yeah Wow so I kind of like cicadas because my dad would tell me story when I was little bit he would walk me around the block as a baby and like the there that white noise of the cicadas would kind of help me fall asleep I think also cuddling with your dad and you know the sensation of swaying and walking helps but I just know them because they yeah they molt yeah and molt off the tree you see all their little skins on shedded skins just hanging off the trees on the ground yeah bugs are cool they load their little hook hands you can take them off the trees you can hang them on anything our response to cicadas is why the three of us love horror movies were like wow little monsters and that's like ah so soothing puts me to sleep mm-hmm have you guys seen that YouTube channel where the guy just takes dangerous bugs and has them bite he has like a doctor standing by he has wilderness right yeah I think so he says them bite him and then he's just like that's what he does that's it and he's just like screams in pain that's coyote Peterson incredible it's like that if you haven't seen that and you have time during the quarantine go watch it because it is addicting and horrifying but okie gone lost you Audrey Keith is gonna come back at some point but hope you're Steve as everybody knows you can email us in your questions and we get a lot of questions about crushes and first dates etc usually we don't answer them because they're usually similar topic so it's like I have a crush on someone I don't know what to do do they like me I'm sure so we thought miles it sounds like you don't like people's questions what's going on man oh thanks enough excuse me I cherish every single question I print them out I post them on my wall I Muse over them ponder them but well we've decided to take this time to answer on mass questions that we've always had and that we've always wondered about about crushes and first dates and how to be cute and how to kiss perfect Eugene tell us about crushes in first dates and how to kiss and be perfect oh no I thought this would be the opposite where we talk about how we failed at doing that exactly exactly exempt a layer that's how people know what not to do okay yeah and I'll tell you some embarrassing story and by the way Keith his his uh something died so he might not be able to rejoin with us and said I'm dead that's all we got dad okay I'll bring it back to a time called second grade second grade something y'all can relate to I thought I liked girls oh yeah I was into Andrew ladies and um but I was very nervous little little Asian boy the only Asian kid and there was this girl I'll use the code name Lauren so there's a girl named Lauren in my second grade class so I had a big old crush on right I was like wow this is the girl men to marry cuz you're in second grade right and everyone just saw me as like the nice kid nice little asian kid and she was kind of interested or kind of dating this boy named I don't wanna use his real name but it's such a good name well calm Gus right his name's Gus this is big like you know a boy who like looks like he should play football eventually and this is second grade right so you're saying she's kind of she's like in a casual relationship with somebody else in second grade yeah I feel like casual relationships were way more active in elementary school because I was like oh I kind of like Gus and Gus is like I kind of like Lauren and I was like no no Lauren's with me and I'd like write about her in like my little journal and then one day we were making these posters for something like some sort of like spirit day cuz that was very popular there's house spirit days I don't know what we were spirited about but um instead she was like across the hall from me or drawing and instead of making the poster I drew this full poster page portrait of her right I just like painted this portrait right and I signed it at the bottom and then I showed her afterwards and I was like Lauren I just wanna let you know I think you're really pretty so I I drew this picture of you as she was like oh my god that's so sweet but then the worst part was was that the teacher liked it so much she hung it up in the school so with the other put stuff so there's this [ __ ] huge portrait with my signature on it and by signature it's just me writing my name like Eugene I'm the only Eugene of her and then Gus finds out cuz he knows he sees it and he comes and beats me up yeah anyway from a girl he put he punched me he punched me in the bathroom and just to get just to get even worse it was near Valentine's Day and then when Valentine's Day happened do you all ever have those uh like packets you put on the edge of your desk and everyone can drop into Valentine's yeah yes Gus rip mine off threw it in the trash and said you don't get any love this year and then what he gave you know what he [ __ ] Gabe I'm so mad about this still you know what he [ __ ] gave Lauren you know what getting worn in running everybody yes he [ __ ] gave her an engagement ring no a lot of plastic diamond ring in front of everybody he rips my thing up throws in the trash gets on one knee and proposes to Lauren well this was second grade it's incredible he was like oh it was like but he does that he goes Lauren will you be my girlfriend if she was kind of I don't know I still think looking back that she was really moved by my portrait and that she secretly liked me this is my glass she said yes and they were together for like a year but I was mortified so after that I was like I'm never gonna I'm never gonna express my crush on a girl ever again which I guess I technically didn't because then I was gay but that was and that's why I'm gay it was like real drama for me so you know I guess the lesson the story is you know grand romantic public gestures tough when you don't have a confirmation back but you know looking back I was proud that I tried then in the end Gus also gave you a Valentine that said roses are red violets are blue stay away from my girl or I'll [ __ ] kill you yeah yeah yeah literally so yeah that was uh that was cute I will say as an elementary school kid the bathroom is where the bullies like were always lingering yeah there's no one the teachers always can't see you yeah and they all have IBS smoking cigarettes getting high giving each other tattoos I remember that some kids gave me like Popeye basically got public poop fear for forever because I think I was like in first or second grade and I pooped at school and like the kids in the bathroom were like and then I was like terrified that like I should I was and I was like I guess I just poop before and after school now poop at school ever again and you've really has around that fear I know I've handled it yeah but I had did you guys in high school or college have like your poop bathroom like a place that you went because you knew it was a good bathroom oh me it was the second-floor bathroom the center prefer Performing Arts at Illinois State University was a bathroom nobody used ever always empty always immaculately clean it was just like you didn't know it was there because you had to go upstairs so there was no reason to go upstairs because it's just the balcony seating for a show so if it's a weekday there's no shows there's nobody in that bathroom one of my favorite high school bathroom stories you guys know my best friend growing up Eric who's still my best friend he was my roommate when I moved out here he was I think elected to the Treasury of our student government and he made his sole purpose his old his platform it was his mission it was every single meeting was getting our school to install splash guards between the urinals and I don't know the ladies listen they may not know is that some urinals they're open you can look left you can look right and some have these little dividers like when you were taking your test in elementary school and you put the folders up so that you can't see but also so that the splash stays contained and after two years of fighting he got it to happen and we installed Wow Scarsdale high school if you're listening you got Eric Charles to thank for the splash guards and then senior year he's peeing next to our vice-principal in the bathroom and he looks over and he goes hey you like the splash card it's like if Larry David had a high-school adventure series that would be his mission did this is a question specifically for the southern boys were any were there any bathrooms in your high school or a school at any point in time that the stalls didn't have doors yes I just remember that it was our high school our basketball gym and also the football bathroom so that bathrooms for the sporting events they didn't have stall doors and that didn't stop any of the older men in the south I'm just taking a dump no matter what it was like a psychological nightmare for a child was it yet to discourage pooping I don't know what it was but I remember when I was in high school once my band director was like why can't you I wanted to use the bathroom in the band room and she's like why can't you use the bathroom in the basketball courts Mike well because Misun Lee they don't have doors and she's like they don't have doors I'm like no that method has no door she's like that's horrifying I'm like I know I don't know how it's okay and then like a year later I think she was like you got it no one had ever questioned it and then we finally got doors when they redid like the whole school and it was like it was like a dream that it was I remember those there were no doors like there's no doors but I can't use that bathroom the worst night use I never knew I had yeah I think it's a weird relic of of sort of the patriarchy right so it's like this idea this is kind of flip side this is where it hurts boys right cuz we are affected to like be very okay being totally naked around each other like while women are forced to like not even know their own bodies it's like no you can't even look down there for boys it's like once you're 12 you're in a locker room it's like take off your clothes look at each other's wee wees like whatever you should be able [ __ ] in front of each other because we it's just such a strange like the idea that because a lot of our bathrooms were sporting stuff too had no doors it is just like take a [ __ ] in from each other what are you not a guy you can't take a [ __ ] from your friends Rauf no no separation just like a bunch of shower heads next to each other we're like a lot of a lot of men's bathrooms and this horrifies a lot of girls and they find out have troughs so it's not even like urinals you just stand on a grate next to like ten other dudes like shoulder-to-shoulder in a trough we're gonna try something new right now it's called getting real for five and we would like to use this podcast as a break from the outside world let you laugh but we also want to bring up some things that we think are important in the world so this week over the last couple days you may have seen the USPS has been trending and the reason why is because they are seeking a bailout and the current administration is refusing threatening to refuse to sign the cares Act which is our relief bill if a bailout for the USPS is included we are here to say that we think the Postal Service is incredibly important despite the fact that I have been on record in the past as saying that I despite I hate loathe getting despise getting mail I I think it's such a nuisance but it is hugely important yeah so we all do hate getting junk mail but the thing that is good about junk mail is it's something that actually funds the post office right because we aren't always now that there's a lot more independent and private delivery companies we order all our things through Amazon but a really important thing about the USPS is that they have to and it's part of the thing they will deliver to every address addresses that you can only get to by boat addresses you can only get to by plane now private delivery companies often have limits on how far they deliver and the last they call it the last mile the final mile they drop off to the USPS because they're the only people who can get and we'll get to some addresses I also like just to say that very clearly Amazon target all of these balconies yes yes yes they use the US Postal Service to deliver that last little extra bit I was also surprised I learned that that yeah junk mail basically subsidizes the other mail and keeps it all cheaper I was favoriting some tweets this weekend and this one said that this person works for FedEx the cheapest way to send a birthday card to a rural resident using FedEx is fifteen dollars and fifty cents so like these are just little things that you don't think about the fact that you can if you use it u.s. post-service fifty cents you can send a letter anywhere in the world or in the country and of course what's really stamps stays awesome and of course what's really important about this is that we have an election coming up and right now we're trying to extend vote-by-mail registration which seems like it's going to be increasingly important especially with the coronavirus and if we don't have a postal service that's that's voter suppression you can't have a democracy if people can't vote and all right some people think that the USPS is like funded by tax dollars it's actually not it does get some grants from the government but for the most part it's weird it's this government office that doesn't actually get the government subsidies that a lot of other government branches and and you know parts use even though they now work you know people were USPS is out on Easter delivering packages they pretty much work all the time and it employs just so many people like so many people rely on not only the Postal Service as a need but also just as occupation is work and it just feels like with all the positives there's such it just feels like such a strange but directed thing to slash and we won't go into them but I think that certainly supporting something as fundamental as access to mail for all citizens is such it's just such a intrinsic right that it just feels particularly cruel to even consider taking that away from people Eugene into your point I believe it's six hundred and sixty thousand people that they employ so if we if we including one of the biggest employers of veterans and people of color so if we don't save them they're going to run out of money by the summer and that's gonna be something something that's in the Constitution it's gonna go away well will retweet some more resources if you want to read more including why their current deficit was something that was somewhat manufactured by a bill that was passed a couple years ago but in general we want to submit you to help us save the post office if you want to help there's actually a super easy way to do it you can yeah what can people what can people do if they're interested so one buy some stamps maybe write a letter spend this time if you have a young kid let them practice their handwriting send the letter it's great and it's easy but the easiest thing you can do right now is text the easiest thing that you can do right now is text USPS to five oh four oh nine it'll put your name on a list that's going to send that to Congress and basically puts your name on a list that says I support the US Postal Service I want to save it easy to that right now easiest I'm doing it right now I'm doing it right - and another thing just about the you know by sense of mail right now it actually would be great to send mail that's local because this the thing that's great about the post service is that whether you're sending a birthday card to your friend two miles away or your friend 2,000 miles away in America it cost the same right but obviously the expense of delivering a letter from Florida to California is greater than from California to California so right just someone in your own town everyone right now probably loves some mail so you know write to your grandparents write to your parents try to keep it local if you can that will actually do the most to keep money in the USPS is pockets and infrastructure and that has been getting real four five flip you but if you're thinking about sending a letter well your might be thinking what should I write what do I do and if you're thinking that you might need some advice dare I say advice that'll go for miles with your host miles miles all to your owner have you ever wanted to try [Music] I don't want to drown [Music] [Music] [Applause] [Music] yeah yeah what's up miles nation how you guys doing tonight wow I am top that was a very special user-submitted theme song from my boy Lucas Matt okay shred it Lucas shred it thank you so much have y'all ever wanted to have a little SP AC e space well not not really right now I'm kind of want them okay describe what I'm doing with my arms Waylon dancing waving yes that's right have you ever wanted just put your finger wherever it wants to go tell me more where's this going miles give me an M mm you know me and you me and I give me a team give me an O Oh give me an O give me an A monitor ar give me an M monitor are on drawing that's right [ __ ] get your ass down to the store and buy that um oh yeah don't go ahead get your hazmat suit on and go down to Best Buy cuz you're gonna buy a monitor arm okay yeah you're dead these are useful your desk is a wreck you stupid [ __ ] your ass is made of sass and it needs to last so you're gonna want a monitor arm to prop up your monitor come ughter above your desk so that you have the space to put your cereal you have the space to put your coffee you have the space to draw a little doodle hole tiny burp he has the space to burp that's right I got coffee I've got mugs I've got ps4 controllers I've got hard drives I've got Ricola cough drops but I have so much space because I have a system that I purchased recently that is one computer monitor one other monitor arm that has my laptop floating above my desk you stupid [ __ ] don't call our listeners back okay well it's all in good fun okay we're calling different audience it's light teasing they learn called stupid [ __ ] yeah okay where where does the monitor arm attach to I'm glad you asked uncle Ned you can do it in a couple different ways you can if you have a desk that like it's possible to this you can like drill a hole and do a whole deal but I don't have that I have a glass desk and I know what you're thinking you're not supposed to clamp something on a glass desk but I did it Wow so I Clinton if it comes with a big clamp so I clamp it on the outer side of the far side of my desk and then it's like a clamp it and then the pole you can put a tube goes up and then the two arms come off it and one of them is holding the monitor and the other ones holding the laptops I get it so it's a hideous way to get you slightly more desk space no it's not hideous at all in fact it makes the monitor look like it's floating Ned you stupid [ __ ] sounds like it would not pass the aerial test which means is hideous also that option is to mount the monitor on the wall so that way it's floating there's cable list there's no mess there's no stress no it's like mounting up TV it's like mounting a TV but in a place they say no it's gonna be I like I'm into honestly anything that gets it more eye level for the ergonomics I'm into exactly but it doesn't it doesn't sound like it looks good rude yeah [ __ ] question miles yeah what's up EJ Mike my main guy why why choose the longer words to spell and that's a great question Eugene now it's because temptation and waiting for the right moment and having suspense is all part of pleasure as you're trying to pleasure us and having that release at the end of monitor are is getting worse is that is that some people wandering quarantine is the release of finding out a surprise guys for those who are only listening on audio and not watching the video feed during advice will go for miles both Ned and Keith got lunch hand-delivered to them and net has been eating food staring into the camera taunting me I'm over here starving yeah the root of [ __ ] that has ever happened to me I I don't even want to know what you're eating I just want you know what I gotta go make myself some lunch and this I think has been an episode of the tripod so how about that your stupid [ __ ] pretty epic guys make sure to subscribe rate is 5 stars it helps other people discover the podcast I hope you're staying inside washing your hands we got episodes every Tuesday and Thursday on the tripod also check us out on youtube youtube.com slash tripod you can watch Ned eat and taunt me with his delicious hands yum yum yum yum yum Keith's got a pizza that looks pretty good give me a tea hey gimme NR ah give me a you yeah give me give me ok so we are still doing our food bank promotion every order that you place on dry guys calm not only helps support the podcast but also helps give food to those in need we are donating a portion of our proceeds all of this month of April until next song but full of food are uck I said TR uck the smells truck t ru ck have you ever seen a truck probably until next time stay beautiful [Music]

Channel: TryPods

Views: 285,853

Rating: 4.9480381 out of 5

Keywords: clip, Trypod, Try Guys, Comedy, Podcast, Youtuber, Zach Kornfeld, Keith Habersberger, Eugene Lee Yang, Ned Fulmer, Miles Bonsignore, youtubers, creators, advice that will go for miles, fan questions, secrets, justin beiber, beef, drama, tea, sis, red carpet, bugs, leeches, tryguys, keith, ned, zach, eugene, habersberger, fulmer, kornfeld, yang, buzzfeedvideo, buzzfeed, ariel, ned & ariel, comedy, education, funny, try, learn, fail, experiment, test, tryceratops

Id: WEiApZQ1KHc

Length: 59min 40sec (3580 seconds)

Published: Tue Apr 14 2020