Journey Home - 2017-11-13 - Fr. Thomas Cavanaugh

[Music] good evening and welcome to the journey home I'm your host Marcus Grodi and welcome again to this program once again EWTN has given me this great privilege to hear the story with you how the holy spirit has touched a life and in our particular case tonight our guest is for one of a better word or referred so he's come back to the church father Thomas Cavanaugh also author of how to win friends for Christ one conversation at a time I loves me because I remember growing up with a book that my dad used to read how to win friends and influence people yeah it's a whole different concept over a purpose for making friends with people this is fascinating salvation in Christ but father welcome to the program and great to have has here to be a great pleasure come up here from Virginia but but let me get out of the way and I'm asking you your story and then one I'm grateful to be here and you know as a saying before we started the just watching the the stories conversion it's just amazing to see so many of our foreign we actually recently had one of the guys who works in our diocese John Knutson up here I remember him and you know he loved his time here and and yeah so uh yes well thank you oh well thank you for being here because the stories are always encouragement because they're not just stories they're evidence of the work of the Holy Spirit in people's lives yeah changing us around yeah all right and then well yes so I'm actually I'm from Arlington Virginia and I'm in the Arlington diocese and I've been a priest I'm going on five years and six years in in seminary and went Franciscan University didn't end up graduated from there graduated from Mary mountain in Arlington but I'm it's kind of a rare thing in the Arlington diocese to be preached that was born and raised in Arlington myself and so is such a transient area around DC so homegrown in in many ways but yeah I mean you were brought up in the church then right yes I was I was raised in the church but so my mom was Baptist though and my dad Catholic and he's actually from from Columbus Ohio and and so they you know whenever the Catholic marriage a non Catholic non-catholic has to agree to raise the the MIRR in the faith and my mom the church was a big part of our life growing up and especially her youth group when she was growing up and so she took us to church on Sundays you know a lot of the time but you know she didn't really know the Catholic Church a traditional go to church so yeah and yes we went to church and most the time we went to you CCD and and and you know we knew that we were Catholic although there's this really funny moment when we were talking about faith and my my youngest brother Dan he he said said I know we're Catholic but mom you're Jewish right so it wasn't your religion wasn't central in our in our in our family but I mean what I will say is if there's any goodness in me it comes from my parents they're just amazing and you know the more I get to know Jesus and and the Holy Spirit the more I realize how much my parents said and did that was that you know formed me to to be ready to hear the gospel and and I think you know whether you're taking your kids to church every day or you know twice a year you know I think you're the best parent can do is give you the you know the stepping stones to sure to come into faith but yeah so I was I was raised in Arlington and I big into adventure not big into school and so you know all day at school I was you know daydreaming about what I was gonna do after school was done played a lot of soccer played a lot of basketball but we lived right in in Arlington just across from Georgetown in DC and you know somehow it you know I always thought I was I grew up in the forest because we're there was you know there's this far shot of our house and so I'd go down to the Potomac River and and you know swim in the Potomac River probably wasn't real real healthy but when I was and I think fifth grade my parents decided to take me out of the public school and to go to the a small Protestant school actually named Rivendell after the the location in the book of the Lord of the Rings oh sure and and so they their motto is helping children discover God's world and and find their place in it and and we would we would actually say the the Shema Israel which was what was in the gospel today every single day here o Israel the Lord your God is Lord alone therefore you should love the Lord God with all your mind your soul your heart you will and love your neighbor as yourself and and so we would you know hear this message again and again and raised or you know around these people they were you know I mean even you develop you know Protestants that word and you just loved loved Jesus but you know we in the carpool going to the school and they would often ask me questions about being Catholic and I had no idea what they were asking because I didn't know it wasn't really something we talked about a lot and so my I remember this one time a lady said so why do Catholics why do you worship Mary and I said I don't worship Mary and and she said well the Catholic Church doctrine says that you worship Mary Anna I said really I guess I should start worshipping her because I didn't know that I was supposed to be and you know so I really didn't know my Catholic faith you know I didn't know that that what she was saying wasn't true you know I didn't know we just wasn't this that you were this I was probably so its fifth grade so maybe 11 or 12 so yeah it's before you would have had a regular confirmation catechesis yeah so this was like you got it before you had yeah at the time you normally would have been prepared if you would have been prepared so you're yeah they're getting questions that even adult Catholics sometimes can't answer very well yeah and so and I was gonna say from very sincere believing Christian brothers and sisters in school oh yeah I was drunk christ-centered yeah they I mean they really radiated the joy of the Lord and and I was very inspired by them but it would just wasn't a part of our life you know and so uh you know when I was finishing there a lot of them were actually they wanted to continue with the Christian education but there wasn't a Protestant high school so so eighth grade ends and Muslim went to the Catholic High School Bishop O'Connell in Arlington and and so I just kind of you know joined them on that journey and I was the only one of my I've three brothers one older to younger and and so I I went I was the only one that went to a Catholic High School and so when I was there I you know you know I started I was enjoying you know getting to know more about the you know the Catholic faith but I I I had a kind of a big cross that that I kind of still have that I wasn't fully aware I didn't know what it was didn't didn't have the tools to understand what was going on at that time which was that I have a TD and dyslexia and so you know my there's a friend of money he always you know you know loving the joechip and he said this is how many ATD kids take to screw in a light bulb hey let's go ride bikes but that wasn't my problem my my my problem was hyper focused so so there was light ball that I couldn't figure out how to screw and I just stick on that one light bulb and try to many of my friends were going to ride bikes yeah so I you know it was a great cross and and so I was put in special needs classes and you know at that time it wasn't as well understood and how is it as it is today and and and so I really thought that I was you know not that bright and and and yeah so it was painful so keeping up with your study isn't with you yeah I mean I couldn't I couldn't keep up with I just didn't have the the tools to know how to do it I mean the main thing was you know an identity that was around that which was that you know I'm I'm not as smart as everybody else I can't do it you know and you started to realize or that identity and so I didn't at that time I didn't I didn't realize that time I just you know really I was angry you know and so I'm hearing the Catholic faith my my parents said you know daily you know we love you and you know and I mean the message that my parents gave me again and again and all my siblings was you know you know it's it's who you are you know that counts and and it's and my mom's we were actually talking on Saturday morning got to see her after and they came back from a trip and and she said you know it's just said it's so simple it's just love God and love your neighbor you know the same meshes that I had heard at Riverdale and and so but but I was angry so the idea that God was loving you know was somehow you know blocked because of that anger and I began to question and and you know I wasn't as as dumb as I thought I was and so I was asking really deep questions in my mind in my heart but didn't have anyone to give me the answer because I wasn't no one knew that I was asking these questions and and at that time my older brother was really struggling with something and so my parents had to focus on him and and so I you know just wanted to be the good kid that didn't cause as much trouble but one thing that might might my parents did was my dad said you know when he was in seventh or eighth grade I think he started working it was sort of branding him you have to work and so I after school or after soccer I would I had to go work once I got in high school and so I worked at this tool rental store in Arlington and called a rental works and the guy that owned the store had kids at Rivendell where I had gone from middle school and he was just the most gentle loving kind guy that that you know I'd maybe ever met and then I'm with him for hours and hours every every Saturday all day and and and he wouldn't be open on Sunday cuz Lord's Day and just had this powerful influence I mean one guy that he hired there was a guy named Josh Reinhold who was actually I didn't knew with this man at the time that he was the son of Chuck Reinhold who kind of designed that young life internationals missions and their discipleship formation so so Josh was working there and Josh he you he's you know from Arlington same neighborhoods that I grew up in but but he had this kind of an identity of being a thug and so he actually had a tattoo that said thug for Christ and so he was he was really cool and a few years older than me and so he would take me after we finished working and we'd drive around and and he smokes cigarettes and he kind of edgy he'd get me a cigar and I'd smoke a little cigar it's kind of this you this cool friendship that we had and I didn't realize it that whole time that Josh could tell that I didn't really have a relationship with God and and he was he you know had this plan to bring me to Christ you know and I I've been baptized I had decided not to be confirmed because like I said I was being I was questioning and my parents didn't force it and and so I decided you know I'm not going to be confirmed and and really was questioning whether or not God even exists you know just was closed off completely our guesses father Thomas Cavanaugh if this friend of yours who's the son of one of the big leaders of young life and right I mean the whole goal of young life is evangelization I used to work with young life or many years ago many years ago a non-denominational not wait to bring teenagers to Christ and very powerful not ministry so it understands to me that this friend of yours tattoo and all yet would understand that that's an avenue of relationship that he was building with you for the very reason yeah of opening your heart to Christ exactly exactly and yeah I mean he used everything that young life teaches and and you know they call themselves a incarnation on ministry right Church people do in church work and you know that same message you know we're you know simple were made to love God and love each other and but I you know was closed to God because of this this pain that I had of you know you know thinking I was I was no good even though no matter how many times my parents you know said you know and they and they were great they they didn't even just didn't put focus on you know your good because you did these things your good because we love you you know and but when you was part of your bitterness you know Lord why'd you make me this way will you kind of blaming God you think if you were dumb excuse me I'm the one with what you felt about yourself were you blaming God about that I it wasn't it wasn't real really a conscious thing there was a point where you know my friends started to in highschool started to also go away and started to do you know things high school kids doing it you know inviting me into that and and so there was you know what was somewhat conscious and and this is where some guilt was started to you know helped me was I was in there someone intentionally saying I don't want God to be real I don't want the viola to be real because if it's true then I can't go down this path that I'm starting to go down with all my friends and and and I've noticed that you know as a priest you know confession the spiritual direction it's it's a it's a common pattern that that we we you before we stop believing before we before we really you know turn away from the Lord we we first turned to you know the the immediate pleasure or the immediate you know you know justice of our you know hurt you know really justification of you the sin that's placed before us and then the doubt and God and so I think that was that was really what was going on there was that I was starting to go with my friends in this wrong direction and I had this one friend though it was he kind of you know appeared to be going down the path with me and so long story short my either my senior year of high school just after I graduated he I remember we were sitting at glebe Road Lee Highway right in Arlington right in the center of the of my town and and we stopped the light and the light I had turned red for us and so waiting there and he said you know Thomas if you died right now when we pull out say someone's trying to make the yellow and they they they they come to crash in don't know what happens to them you know but we but we die he said you know because of my relationship speaking of himself he you know he says I know Jesus I believe in Jesus I would go to heaven and said you Thomas you wouldn't go to heaven I was like hey man I thought we were friends but uh but I realized when he said that that he said it because he loves me because he doesn't want me to go to hell he wants me to know Jesus in this life and for all eternity and I decided you know I'd been I've been to you know a Christian middle school on a Catholic High School and I'd never actually read the Gospels Bible for myself to decide who is this Jesus guy that everyone's always talking about and so I I decided was gonna read it well not long after I graduate from high school another friend and I took a trip through through Europe and it worked all with your eyes got all this money saved and and while we're in Europe I I you know held true to my promise I was gonna read and decide for myself I wasn't sure if God existed or if Jesus was really who you know everyone says he was until I read it for myself and so I I took the Bible it's actually my younger brother Matt's Bible and I still I still use it waiting for his conversion I'll give it back maybe I shouldn't give it an import in the fourth street in the anyways so I took it night you know I started reading the Old Testament I got to a little bit of kiss and I just couldn't make it so I skipped ahead to the Gospels and I'm reading the Gospels and I had always hated reading I think I read one or two books my entire life you know once because I was sick and I my mom said I couldn't watch any more movies so I'm sitting at home I had your book but I never loved to read and I hated being a student it was so painful I had no plans to go to college dr. high school had so high I'm reading the Bible in it and I start to enjoy learning enjoy reading and I'm fascinating fascinated by what Jesus is saying how come nobody ever told me this you know no and I'd heard it many times I'm sure but but it was just it was so attractive and so you know freeing but I still wasn't ready to say that this is God and so we came to Rome and we happen to get to Rome it's the year 2000 it's Ash Wednesday and we come in we had no idea that that's what it was and we come out of the place we're staying and there's all these crowds going in the same direction what is going on here we follow them and we looked in the church and someone told us that was Ash Wednesday oh wow and and my friend whose name's Gus and he's Catholic as well so but we I mean neither of us were really practicing at the time especially but so we but we follow the crowds and they go to st. Peter's Square and so it's kind of neat the image right there and so right there I mean it was like it actually looked just like this and and we're in st. Peter's Square and you know look up over the crowds and there's this guy in a white robe with a white beanie on his head I turned to Gus I'll say hey it's the Pope guy he's like you want to O'Connell's you and so I mean I had no idea who the Pope was and so I got really excited I start running and I get to the first offense and I just jumped over the fence got to the next fence just happened to hit the gate went straight through it meanwhile Gus is right heads up and and I and finally get to the last fence and and the Swiss Guards are there with her you know dangerous-looking spears of them I'll stop here but I'm now you know very close looking at the pope john paul ii didn't even know his name and I started thinking well how there was a pope before him before him beforehand before him all the way back to this guy Peter and I had just read the night before that or at least that week before you know Matthew chapter 16 where Jesus says who do you say that I am and Peter believed that Jesus was the Messiah the son of the Living God it's a right thing on Ash Wednesday and st. Peter's Square in the year 2000 I came to believe God my Savior so you you didn't know much about your Catholic faith though at this point right but you'd the experience of seeing the successor of Peter there awakened your heart toward Jesus yeah I mean reading the Gospels it really I didn't understand what had happened you know I you know a couple you know one thing you know an 18 year old you know in Rome or in Europe you know we were there too you know you know to explore and be adventurous and and you know we wanted to drink and so a week later Gus turns mises are you doing okay I said oh yeah better than ever he says he says you seem funny like what do you mean he said you uh you haven't said a cuss word in a week he said and you haven't had any alcohol that's one of the reasons why we're here and I'm not gonna have to drink alone you know I mean just it was you know this really you know revelation my gosh you know and I and after Rome we went and we visit a friend of mine in in Germany she'd been our Opare when I was when I was a a kid and you know she was kind of my mother's additional discipline disciplinarian you know and so we had mixed feelings better at I mean she's gracious like older sister but but went there and you know the Holy Spirit that had received it at you know my baptism began to you know really pour out the UK I was allowing it for the first time allowing his love to injure me you know I remember think he was so strange that I i had toward her like she was my sister even though she had been that you know in some sense for my whole life and I just loved everyone and and and that was another thing Gus was concerned by he's like you know you used to not like that person who just spoke well that person's you know I thought he was our enemy and I I don't know I mean he was kind of a dizzying experience cuz I I didn't know what was going on I was wondering I mean you you definitely been changed by grace but yeah II didn't put a finger on what it was that was happening yeah yeah and I didn't know I had no idea that you know what it meant that this is the Vatican and this is the church and and so I came home and my my boss Kip he knew exactly what was going on and so so he you know he explained to me that this is conversion and and and the Lord is you know taking hold of your heart and your life and and it kind of gave me some direction on on how to do that but he wasn't Catholic and so I had no idea that I you know I mean there was some sense from you know what I had learned in school but you know it wasn't in my family wasn't it's not spelled out you know there's no the Catholic list is not in the scriptures that you know as a list right but then then Josh whether the guy that had you know lovingly challenged me he introduced me to his parents and his dad Chuck and his mom Melinda and they invited me to be a missionary with them in Ethiopia well and so you know all I had no ideas already go to school all I wanted was adventure and and now I I wanted adventure and Jesus and so really were they just ignoring your Catholic but past or were they purposely putting put tree getting you to put it aside I think they figured that I was like a lot of phenomenal Catholics that you know you know I didn't you know I didn't know and so maybe I don't know if it was intentionally ignoring but but they they really didn't focus on that in fact Chuck Reinhold was very complimentary of the Catholic Church and he he'd taught me a lot about st. Francis of Assisi who I eventually took as my confirmation st. but so they Chuck was very Chuck was a big part of actually why I came you know fully back to the church now you know I guess get to that part of something to say that are many for separated brethren and I worked with young life for many years the the emphasis is on surrendered to Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior yeah what church you belong to is not all that important yeah so it may not have been an issue he's seeing in you someone that's by grace has come back to Christ Marie is God yeah and so also how Q how can they get you engaged to give away your faith which is the way we grow in our faith is not giving it away while we pause at a time for a break alright father and we'll come back and pick up get ready to go on the missionary trip right yeah in your story okay what we'll come back to that we get [Music] [Music] welcome back to the journey home I'm your host Marcus Grodi and father Thomas Cavanaugh is our guest and I've rudely interrupted you in your journey you're getting ready on fire for our Lord Jesus and associated with young life it's a non-denominational interdenominational even John far reach two teens worldwide but you've been invited to go to missionary trip right yeah yes I mean you know at that time I was very intense and you know I hadn't heard all these good people telling me about God's love and you know especially my you know my parents tell me it was simple you know message about loving God loving others so I I was I wasn't a real helpful son at that time and remember my dad complaining to my mom or you who was but I I don't know if I've ever heard their whatever Issa gosh it you know you know I I'd rather him rather than it being a mission I wish to go to college even if that meant you know he was at college chasing girls I mean you know but this missionary deal then you know why don't you know he's a you can do this and he can do college he just needs to go in but uh but they were I don't know if they ever said that directly to me they they were very supportive very loving and they just said you know we're proud of you for you know you learned at Riverdale school you know discovering you know who you are in God and in his world so so I went to Ethiopia with Chuck Reinhold and Linda his wife and and Josh came halfway through the year and went over there and you know so it was a very intentional discipleship community they we all lived in the house the big a literally compound the the ladies lived in one part of the compound the men and another apartment and we would have meetings on Tuesdays and Thursdays for a few hours and we're just you spend hours reading the scriptures praying together and talking about how we're gonna go out and share Jesus and so that became a big you know you know how I was formed as a as a disabled of Christ but uh and then another big thing was Chuck he he said you know I and he had done some Ignatian and retreats and stayed in monasteries for his spiritual life and the love of st. Francis of Assisi and and so he required us to get up at 5:00 a.m. every day and and pray read the scriptures talk to the Lord see what the Lord was telling us to do so that became a really big part of my life and then I met a person there who I was part of the Pentecostal church that's like ashen that's interesting you know Pentecost and and he kind of asked me do you have the Holy Spirit and and I was kind of loosely Catholic at that point but I still didn't you know I don't know how often I went to you know you know if I went to the Catholic Church once a month that was pretty good at that time but I still had no idea of what it meant to be Catholic to be in the body of Christ the mystical body of Christ in that way and so I but I had this question here you know I now I know Jesus but do I have the Holy Spirit and so in it really bothered me you know I was in love with especially in Jesus's suffering on the cross you know you know those words you know other way the other way lomasa bustin II my God my God why have you forsaken me and and it just because because that's what I had felt before I had this conversion and and so I was so drawn to the to the cross but I I didn't know that at my baptism I had received the Holy Spirit I didn't know he was there the whole time but I began to make a plan like how am I gonna get the Holy Spirit you know I don't want to wait you know you know 18 years like I did for Jesus you know and that was kind of the message that I was being given by people that when I had a conversion I got had nothing in my life until that moment okay and so so that was in my head that that's what had happened I don't know one you know I mean it wasn't intentional but it kinda made me think that you know even the people at Rivendell had o'connell you know my middle school my high school my parents no one was showing me Jesus they didn't intend to say that but that was sort of pleasant so I was like okay I'm not going to wait that long you know God wants me to the Holy Spirit I'm gonna get the Holy Spirit that's who I heard a speaker say you know a couple years ago he said you know the thing about pride as it grows back and so high I didn't realize that that's what it was and so I but it was it was good what happened it and I don't recommend that people do this but I I just said I'm gonna fast and pray until I get the Holy Spirit and so you know I for in Chuck and your encouraged us to fast you know weekly that they're you know at least one or two days a week that you make some kind of sacrifice you know and and so I I took it to the next level though you know I think it's part of the ad D you know hyper focus and you know if I'm going too fast I'm gonna I'm only I'm only gonna not eat you know and so I I you know I continued my ministry with any evangelization on the streets with them but but I literally for I was I said I was gonna fast and I was gonna pray for an extra hour to every day until I got the Holy Spirit well this went on for over a week and a half and and someone noticed that I would kind of step away whenever everyone when everyone was eating so they there's a little concern like what's going on you're not eating and so then I told something wrong I'm I'm fasting for something then and and so but there's sort of this concern what do you what are you doing this is kind of intense and which I get a lot but I then realize okay I can't keep fasting and you know the thing about is you after a few days you don't really feel hungry and where you just gonna and I think there is some kind of cleansing thing or so but I was just having water and so then I finally decided okay I guess I'm not gonna get the Holy Spirit I I know Jesus that's drink but I disgraced in the unlife theology and what you were doing the Holy Spirit was not really mentioned very much well there was people in it you know you know we you know just more theorized it focuses its incarnation on mr. they focus very much on Christ and they right now they mentioned the father they mentioned the Holy Spirit that there's no real clear theology with young Levites it's I think they're kind of intentionally unclear because they they want to just be focused on that Jesus and the Gospels and right and helping young people that to know him and so there was no one really influencing me in this it was just my view my my inclination to you know to focus in on things and and and so I I decided I was gonna stop this fast cuz it you know it was unhealthy and so I went upstairs and I and I made myself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich I can't it that kind of remembers peanut butter and jelly or honey but anyways I was about to eat and I said well I should at least go save prayer ending this time thanking the Lord you know for you know the you know you know the grace that did come and and so I go downstairs and I you know kind of angry that I didn't have the Holy Spirit but I say okay then you know thank you Lord and and I and I just about to get up to go in my peanut butter and jelly sandwich and right then it was like Pentecost I just filled with so much love that I mean I I felt for a minute I was gonna die just like holy smokes you know just and I mean just overwhelming sense of be but the thing about it was it was that the revelation was you can't want you can't produce me you can't make you know me you know what happened in your life and and to was I've been here the whole time and I'm the one that brought you through every step of the journey that you know you know I'm not gonna force you and with the Spirit of the Lord is there's freedom and so he he you know with my freedom he led me to this moment where and it is very humbling to realize that I you know I'm really not in control but I have a good guy a loving God Jesus Christ who leads me to the Father and and gives me his spirit and he's been there the whole time leading me and so that was a huge moment and and not long after that I discovered that there was a Catholic mission actually there was tons of Catholic mission there was because I'm in Ethiopia in Addis agua and we're right by Corday which is the poorest part of the city it's it's actually part of it's built on the dump and so we're across the the river from there in Mecca and easie and so so I discovered that there was a Catholic mission there there's the Silesians and and they work with youth as well and so I'd go there and I and talk to the priest and he was the only one that spoke English and he and he kind of said well you you all really aren't welcome to come into our compound and and and work with our kids just because we're Catholic he said I said well I'm Catholic he's like no yeah I'm Catholic and and and he said we'll where do you go to church as well it kind of gives yeah and you got to go to church and and so I started going to church there started going you know not every Sunday because I still only you know and I was kind of there was in my mind cuz and we had our youth minister Eden they had there's kind of like well they're kind of competition and and so I but I started going you know more regularly and and then about the last two weeks before I was gonna leave the the mission in Ethiopia I got a phone call from an American which was really strange because usually I'd pick up the phone I didn't know what to say because I could I never language yeah with my ATD I never could learn the language and so I calls him and he says he's a Catholic priest and he knew someone that knew my father from from you know his work and and and someone that knew my mother from his parish and and totally separate they didn't know each other and they both had told him about me and and so he was gone to you know check in on and so so he we planned it to meet after Mass on that coming Sunday and and he you know got to know me a little bit he's very very gentle and loving and and kind of told me very straightforwardly that you know the the Catholic Church is the Church of Jesus Christ and unless you come back into the Catholic Church you are not you know fully United with his his body and the way that you at least could I mean there's definitely a lot of in his statement but there was there was the freedom of you know you could have this and so it really got me thinking and he also told me about Franciscan University and and connected with me with some people back in in in Arlington that that I would you know they were able to disciple in the Catholic day and and so when I got back to Virginia one of the people was the priest who became my spiritual director father Jack Riley who hopes with formed the you know the website with the Augustan Institute and in Colorado and but he at that time he was in Arlington and so when talked to him and he goes was lost time you went to confession probably at least 10 years ago and he said let's do confession okay you know I really didn't know I didn't even know that I needed to I had not you know had your time in the non-denominational ministry had had the ever downplayed Catholic confession or was it just never there there was a there was a few times where you know and I mean Chuck Reinhold he was great he really he would defend you'd say well you know the Catholic Church is the only one that holds a line on morality in our world and so we you know he himself never wanted to become Catholic I you know never pushed that with him but he was he was very you know affirmative in and and my question wasn't in any way to be critical of him by but often in that environment where the full Jesus Christ that just hasn't brought up there definitely was some challenges and actually when I was there I in Ethiopia I had brought the book that I was supposed to have read in high school on you know the catechesis that I was supposed to be getting in so I read that and I I didn't honestly think it was that compelling but when when I was challenged by the priest in Ethiopia and then and then the priest now asked me to go to confession it it seemed like it was from the Holy Spirit you know and so I I went to confession and confessed you know all my sins and it's whenever my my last one which it was probably my first confession back before first communion and I came out of there and I thought that I had received so much grace and until then but in both my conversion moment and that moment when you that the Pentecost moment really didn't even come close to this this lifting up of this weight that I didn't even know that I had now I mean literally I did somersaults to my car afterwards holy smokes and so since that day I've gone to confession once a week further now sixteen years and well not there's been a few times where I haven't but but I decided that I was gonna go and and around that time I I started talking to my grandfather who is from Columbus and and he he started telling me his stories from World War two and how he had not been Catholic before World War two but he had met Padre Pio in world war ii and he converted to catholicism and and he he told me I had no idea that he did this the since world war ii he had gone to mass every single day and so that when he was in his 20s and he died and just four or five years ago and so these are the spiritual heritage through him yeah oh yeah so I've always thought you Padre Pio was was praying for me and and so yes you know that conversion in a confession then I realized I need to look into this Catholic thing I know I you know say I say in Catholic but I'm really still just nominal Catholic but there was a grace that came through confession that was so powerful and so livery so healing that I didn't know I didn't even know that I needed healing and and so then I started you know reading and studying that I got accepted to Franciscan University I was taking classes so I was you know I only had two more years of college at that point which is a big healing for me because that was such a wound in my life that I you know just to think you could study I could look right yeah and and around that same time there was a another guy that was he's still huge in my life Sam Casey who you should actually have him wonder sure he's he's got a powerful story of coming back to the church but he he was taking on these bike rides he he was a father from my rivendell middle school experience and and he he was taking me on these bike rides and he would you know start to ask me about you know Catholicism and he ended up becoming my confirmation sponsor and and you know he would ask me these questions kind of leading me to back to you know you know on my journey home and so just really great mentor and showed me that you know it's not just the not just in the Protestant church that you have this you know this is you know our you know you know this this heritage of of the scriptures and and prayer is you know from our Catholic faith and where we have the sacraments we have the the leadership of the church that was instituted by Christ to govern us and to show us what the you know how to read the scriptures and he introduced me to so many things that I I didn't know I didn't know about you know the mystics of the church and and that these things that I was experiencing were normal you know you know I don't know if he did but someone introduced me to lumen gentium the the dogmatic Constitution of the church and this universal call to holiness that this is normal that every Catholic you know through the grace of Baptism and Confirmation and the strengthening of the Eucharist can become holy can become a saint and and it's just as powerful influence on my life to show me this you know the depth and the riches and treasures of our of our Catholic faith was it still while you're at Franciscan this was actually that was mostly before Francis okay alright so you went to Franciscan with a rebirth of your Catholic faith and an understanding in the urging to know more and yeah I mean I still there still was some some fear that some of the things that I was told about the Catholic Church were true you know that you know the you know the you know just you know different you know ideas that really we're just from you know not knowing and all you usually from you know very good people that I greatly respect and and and admire for their faith but and some of them who are now Catholic because you know they led me to Jesus and you know together in Jesus we've you know joined the journey home including my buddy Gus that was there with my kin you know he's he aunt you know his wife and I was Catholic and that you know I've done the baptism for two of their kids and and yeah so so to a certain extent your confession was a return to the church officially but you'll learn more and more about it yeah at what point in there did you discern priesthood well you know from as soon as I walked into the st. Peter's after my that initial conversion of heart I you know there's the the pride hadn't really left yet so I walk in I'm looking at these statutes tonight and I don't if I said it to guess I was kind of thinking you know what you got to do to get your statue in here but but what really was you know an authentic you know the Holy Spirit was I started to think about priesthood and which you know as soon as I got home my girlfriend didn't like that and you know all my friends were like yeah that's kind of weird you know that why would you need more you know do that it's so you know that's not that's not biblical is what I was kind of you know told and and but I you know I read and the Gospel of Matthew where Jesus very clearly says some people will be celibate for the sake of the kingdom and and I it was very clear you know reading st. Paul that he was celibate and that he you know was dedicated to his ministry he was he was a priest that solved the the church as his bride this is beloved because of the grace of his ordination and so I I couldn't you know you know deny that so I joined focus the fellow of Catholic University students wonderful and and I really joined focus similar that got in focus I realize I joined them so that I didn't have to go to Britain to the seminary and so I went on I'd really been struggling with the vocation while I was a student though I I'd go to my Holy Hour and and and I would just deliberate priesthood or marriage or religious life you know just keep going back and forth again and again so I decided I wasn't gonna think about anyone and I was just gonna think about Jesus but I mean focus when we went on this retreat and on the retreat I was kneeling with everyone else looking at Jesus in the in the Eucharist and very gentle voice in my heart said priesthood and it was so vivid that I thought someone had said it so I looked and realize no one had said it and the next not makes it be the day after that I was driving home from the retreat several hours I was praying the rosary the Joyful Mysteries and I never got past the first joyful mystery because I I was you know there with you know with Mary and the Holy Spirit and and you know the Lord's had preached it and and I said you know you're still just struggling with you know my identity and and you know in some sense Catholicism still at that point but but uh really just my unworthiness thinking that I'm I'm not good enough and so I said Lord how can this be and and just as the Holy Spirit as the angel said it Mary the Holy Spirit will come upon you and and so I said yes with Mary and and I've never questioned my vocation to the priesthood yeah if a guy's gonna call you to he's gonna give you the graces you need to to do that Wow I gotta know two minutes to go because I'd like to talk more about that but I want to make sure that we mentioned the book how do been friends for Christ one conversation a time I won't have a chance to go through the whole book at this point uh but I'd like to ask how did this book is this book and a an expression and out flooring it for your own conversion back to Christ in the church yeah I mean the I you know I was one conversation at a time with with Josh and Kip and and and Sam Casey and Chuck Reinhold and and my mom my dad that came you know helped me to believe that God loves me and and so you know it's worth having these conversations but so many people don't know how to have those conversations I just why doesn't happen and and so in seminary I mean my friends there we decide we're gonna become experts in the evangelization so we we started these mission trips and every break in this fall and spring we'd go on college campuses and we'd have one conversation at a time and and you know we talked to thousands of people and we had large groups of seminarians we talked to thousands of people and you know there where we rejected people always we're happy to receive you know the love of someone you know who represents Christ and and and so we wrote this down to to help people to know how to do it and that's amazing you know talk to to you know grandparents that have used the tools from this book to bring their their children and grandchildren back to the faith and talk to you know parents that have learned two or couple new marriages you know where they've learned to evangelize each other or their kids or you bosses at you know with their employees or employees with their bosses that have used these tools that really are kind of common sense and it's been amazing to see how people are using it to win friends for Christ for conversation every time well art st. Peter said in his first letter that we were to be ready at all times to give a reason for the whole thing is we need to be ready you talk about witness and there but it also is recognizing that your mission field begins with the very people that God placed in your life yeah it isn't just over there New Guinea it's right here yeah it's so developing those relationships father quickly as we close could you give us a blessing amen and father place your your blessing on Marcos and all the the people that serve in this ministry and all the people that are watching this show around the world those that know you and want to become missionary disciples those that are that are seeking to know you and on their journey home that you would bless them fill them with your peace in your life I mean I'm ready god bless you all the Father Son Holy Spirit amen father thank you very much yeah thank you for sharing your journey and for your book and I do pray that it inspires a lot to be active disciples for our Lord Jesus Christ in history so thank you very much and thank you for joining us on this episode of the journey home I pray that father Cavanaugh's journey is an encouragement to you god bless you see you next week [Music]

Channel: EWTN

Views: 10,800

Rating: 4.4324327 out of 5

Keywords: JHT, JHT01592

Id: 97JWxrDfWPo

Length: 56min 10sec (3370 seconds)

Published: Mon Nov 13 2017