Jerma Streams with Chat - Thief Gold

my how you doing what's happening i cleared my throat right before talking to and that's the worst you don't think you're just ready to talk this happens sometimes when i answer a phone call too milk voice did you say milk voice what the hell that's weird i know exactly what that means i don't even like drink milk anymore i don't even like milk that is weird all right anyways right before you answer a phone call you go [Music] don't bring me faster during me for some needy hello and then you answer and say that you get like prepared and then you answer the phone call but after that it sucks when you do all that so you the phone starts ringing and you go oh you can do this you can do this you can do this you can do this i hate it it's the worst next game what i'm just [ __ ] around why does everybody take everything i say so seriously you know what i mean why he's not serious batman i'm [ __ ] up today i'm in a really weird mood i think the reason why i'm in such a weird mood today is because this is a whole hands worth of olives sitting next to me and i'm gonna put them on my fingers i guess as i was buying the olives and as i was walking around and as i was getting prepared for the stream every five to six minutes i'd say who am i doing this for it's not for me because i don't care right i like don't care about putting olives on my fingers it's it's one person said this one person i why do i do this i don't even why do i do this i don't care either i don't know why i don't know yeah exactly like does anybody here actually want to see this i don't think anybody cares oh doing it anyways and i'm not going to do it till there's at least 10 000 people here i know i'm like what a psycho an ego maniac no i'm not gonna eat olives off my fingers unless there's ten thousand people here watching hey uh anyways today probably saw the title i'm gonna play thief gold give you a short story here thief gold has been installed well not installed it's been uh purchased and in my you should stream this list uh for probably three or four years since i was back in massachusetts i just kind of looked at it today i was like fine i'll put it on the poll why not and it won so uh this is the gog version yes this is not the steam version this is somebody said do you collect trinkets around your house pretending to be a goblin laughing as you throw them into a sack i would do that in my own house no in your houses where you you start you counting the things you took i took the goblet i took the treasure chest i took the gold coins i don't put them back in the sack i count them why would i do that i've already put them in the sack i took the urinal uh i took the urinal yeah oh shitty that what like that sucks what am i gonna do with that what would i do with that that's just stupid you converted it into a fan that thing's nice in fact thanks for reminding me i'm going to turn it on now i'm turning my rotating urinal on because i want some air it's actually pretty cool this thing works it's got a filter in it you know that this has got a like an air filter baked into this in the middle inside of it and it sucks air in through the filter and then blows it off the top it's actually pretty cool and there's no there's no fan on it it's a fanless fan eat an olive on stream i'm just hold on i just turned it on all right so we're talking you want like the hold on i gotta i gotta go on campus but you want what you want is you want you talking about like i get it on my hand and i go like right that's what you want like one two three four five right that's what you're looking for i think that's what you want can i even get these on it's gonna be hard we're moving on real quick from this too by the way this is like i'm not spending more than a minute on this i can't how am i supposed to do it on both hands i just broke one [ __ ] hit the goddamn ground and it's your fault you did this to me all right look at my fingers i it hit the ground i can't these ones have like pimento in them i can't put these on my finger i mean i can i don't care does everyone hit the ground i got the wrong olives i don't know anything about what do you think i know anything about olives why would i know anything about olives why would i know anything about olives why would i know anything about all of us hey did you get the wrong olives oh yeah oh sorry just like [ __ ] 40 cases at the grocery store i can't get them on all my fingers you can just photoshop it here look i got the wrong olives ego ready like oh that looks gross okay what is pimento your hands too big are they too small i don't know they're just olives i just got like olives i don't know because there's this black olives green olives black olives are like cut into rings sometimes is that what you meant i just bought olives at the grocery store i don't know i got two on my fingers what the [ __ ] is he doing i don't i you know and that's exactly why we're done just use one of my dog wipes these are actually dog wipes i'm not kidding these are dog grooming wipes like wipe others paws no deal i didn't even make a deal i don't care if i don't i wouldn't even deal i don't care i was just like i'm going to try to put them on you got scammed there was no scam there's no deal i just somebody said put olives on your fingers and go like whoo-hoo at the screen and i was like okay i'll i guess i'll do it why put it all above each nostril no no because that's [ __ ] weird that's like i don't know i don't no not happening i don't even like olives i like olive oil but like olives are like a little too acidic he considered it i did because it's stupid and but like that's childish right it's childish it's childish it's what it is it's it's like oh look at this i got olives in my nose clowns don't even do that at children's birthday parties what nobody should ever do that no one should ever do something like that sneeze out the olives yeah that's just weird why would somebody why would anybody do that anyways we're gonna play there you go the one for the one person that said put olives on your fingers and eat them i don't know what that was for but there yeah i got the wrong olives a scam i mean maybe i'll put it on for a little bit but i gotta move it though it's in the wrong spot actually well who cares doesn't matter so i can crop it but we're gonna play thief drop this here that looks all right i don't you know what i don't like forward facing facecam i feel like i'm in like an interview with you right oh i feel like you're inside the monitor and it's weird i like an angle because it's like you're like over here you're not just like literally staring in my eyes like here i don't like forward-facing webcam all right well whatever we're gonna move this out of the way i'm going to let me just move the camera in case i want to use it for any reason i would play thief if gold it's the gog version i don't know anything about this game no nothing at all just remove the pair of underwear that's on the ground over here so you don't see it i want you to see it i want you to see the underwear that i have on the ground don't worry about it close my door all right all right let's go why is there underwear in your office i don't know because i was probably like doing laundry or something is it a good spot tell me not really oh [ __ ] i have a ring light i can turn no it hurts my eyes i don't want to use it all right we got pretty much everybody's here we can get going thief gold make sure i'm comfortable i need to no you know what i got to get these olives are going to smell and it's going to make me [ __ ] gag perfect put the ring light around your neck if i put the ring light around my neck i it could actually fit that would be [ __ ] stupid oh don't don't stall this stream any more than it has to be please let me just play thief that's so stupid i think my no what if i get stuck what if i guess it's not going to happen like go get it go to like get removed what if i get stuck no i might get stuck i think i could get it in there but what if i can't get it up if i get stuck i'm 36 okay i can't make those mistakes anymore i can't put my head in a ring light and then blame it on like like oh man you know i just i was in college or you know we were tricking bud lights and i was like yeah you know give me the rig light i'll put her i'm 36 i'm an older man now i can't do that i can't go to like the emergency room and like blame it on like the [ __ ] butt reds we were all drinking like having a fun just hanging out and like put it around no nope no no that i could get that's dangerous just tell the nurse that you're famous well who cares oh yeah i see i'm famous that's why i put a ring light around my head and got stuck what is that what's that to do with anything like the idiocy is still just the same as if i had one viewer or ten thousand all right let's go imagine the drunk guy that just comes in yeah sorry yeah yeah i'm sorry i'm famous by the way famous where get out of my college dorm room it's the same it's the same exact argument yeah they call they call me [ __ ] crazy crazy bill pretty famous no i'm not doing it maybe i'll see if i can put my head in there not today though on on the next stream if it's safe i'll do it all right turn this [ __ ] off all right we're gonna play thief you ready i'm famous well then you should you should probably know better like what you hold on you tell me that you showed an audience of like 15 000 people hahaha look how funny it is i just got my head stuck in a light you should be way more responsible what are you talking about all right we're going to play thief i'll do face cam eventually maybe in like 10 minutes how hard is this game is this game hard tell me the truth tell me the truth this is a hard game yeah okay if chad is good i'll turn the face game on only if you're good though and you i i you and you better prove it start training normal heart not playing this on export i'm not playing it on hard either not happening my arms are too high what's going on here okay i need to be there i'm going to be higher than chair there it is okay all right start training i don't know how to play i'm playing on normal i'm not playing on hard it's a boomer stealth game oh god the essence of balance is detachment to embrace a cause to grow fond or spiteful is to lose one's balance after which no action can be trusted a burden is not for the dependent of spirit i my third keeper i was a kid no parents no home running messages and picking pockets to keep my ribs from meeting my spine one night i saw a man folks just passed him by like he wasn't there i thought he must have something valuable so i snuck up on him and made a grab that's not for you oh please sir i'm hungry don't tell the hammers i promise what is your name boy garrett you have talent lad let go of me old man to see a keeper is not an easy thing especially one that does not wish to be seen we have a need for those as gifted as yourself if you've grown tired of how you live then follow me and we will show you a difference it's worth paying for alone a young actor to do this i caught up with him just before he vanished into the crowd it was the beginning of a very long education this is always the problem i have with audio books too i like i don't reading i don't reading is fine right you can kind of make up your own voices and stuff but anytime you listen to an audio book and the it's usually just one person who reads the whole book and they'll typically do voices for everybody and it's usually like if they get to like a young character or a character with much higher pitched voice that they think they if they kind of and when they have a conversation with themselves it's always funny it's like i didn't want to do that i didn't want to go there well you you had to at school is it very important as she said leaning down it's always kind of feels off somehow but that can almost add to the charm in a way but yeah i i like to make up my own voices in my head when they when they do it that's literally you that's what i'm saying all right normal follow the directions of your instructor in order to pass the training tests is your last chance to make it not normie welcome young garrett in the nearby rooms i will instruct you in the various skills you will need to survive please stay in the entrance area to each room while i explain the room's purpose when you are ready to begin your lessons proceed down this hallway to the first room who's walking what if i'm not ready what are those health what do i have like little health icons um hold on a minute this is freaking me out what are these controls wait wait wait wait what's happening i'm gonna puke okay a and s is not strafe it's look left and right w and w is walk forward what's going on here holding s walks me forward it's tank controls no it's not i need to rebind the keys forward w walk forward shift shift backwards is x oh my goodness x no s backwards s what okay slide left z should be a right slide right is d what why what's going on turn left slide to the right slide to the left okay turn left is fine that's can be keyboard turn right look up page center the view is v lean left q and e is fine doggle crouch f what are you what drugs are you taking c jump empty space attack mouse one use item is there a okay mouse two no no block use item mouse three block radius control walk speed toggle what's that mean speed toggle like run and walk r slide on alt free look is it sprint speed next item these are all empty drop item g um free look i don't know like this thing next item can i do scroll oh okay i can wait should i even do that though previous item scroll up clear item backspace next weapon previous weapon oh i don't care clear weapon who cares sword blackjack arrow water arrow fight what is all this magical [ __ ] i thought it was a stealer rope healing potion f1 breath potion f2 what is this listerine what are you talking about breath potion holy water f3 some you guys just helped me out whatever square-toothed lock pick triangle tooth lock pick flash bomb gas mine compass view map m objective oh hold the crunch uh control jump slash block keyboard insert gamma gamma rays gamma plus lean forward w alt shift quick save all right we know what quick save is take a screenshot increase main volume decrease volume i'm just gonna play okay at least like the basic controls are fine you must learn how to move unseen stay in the shadows the indicator on your screen will tell you how visible you are try to reach the top of the platform without being seen okay top of the platform where's the top of the platform so just don't be seen by see you there lad he's literally facing the other way what his head is facing the door of the well-lit areas until you reach i see you there lad he's not even looking this way he's looking at the door he's literally facing the other direction but just because i'm in the shade you can't see me dude oh he's not he's looking this way all right so get to the top of the platform so i gotta get behind him well done i did not see you approach open this door to continue when the door is near the center of your screen it will light up indicating that it is selected okay to manipulate selected doors and other objects use them oh that's bad mouse three to use what a dumb idea proceed down this corridor for your next test any sprint you can check your map at any time there's a show where oh no please no no no no no it doesn't give you like a you are here in the mall oh this is bad i guess i'm right here now you must learn to move quietly some surfaces are louder than others when walked upon and moving quickly makes more noise than moving slowly okay don't walk on like this to your own footsteps to hear how much noise you are making the instructor will have his back turned you must get to the top of the platform without being heard isn't he the instructor all right so just don't step on that that probably makes noise did you hear me good i did not hear you traverse the room grab him by his top his head in the bottom of his head and just twist that will lead you to your next task [Music] what they're going to teach me how to kill people like get your weapons whoa to pick up objects select them by centering them on screen until they light up i gotta use them choose your weapon now try readying your sword and then your bow you can hold you can always put them away again if you need your hands free without my hand feel like i'm in vr this this isn't vr moment where is he i can't get him oh he's over here ow he didn't make the noise but you know ready your bow knock an arrow and draw back the string by holding down the attack button make sure you draw all the way back or your shot will not have full power take aim when you are ready to shoot release your attack see if you can hit one of these targets all right that mouse sensitivity drops a lot did i miss every shot what wait a minute did i miss every shot it's happening turn around oh good shot keep practicing if you wish when you are ready to proceed approach the training dummy and ready your sword headshot ready your sword swing at the target with the attack button a quick tap will give you a slash move the tip of your sword to the left of the target for a left slash and to the right of the target for a right slash button down then release swing try both slashes and the overhead swing on the practice dummy you can tell how good you're doing based on the cartridge and sound defense to practice against your partner enter the cobbled sparring area the more it sounds like scooby-doo the better you know you're doing you want to go wait is this the trainer attack him with your sword not your bow wait did i just get disqualified that hurts his ears are ringing right now oh i can block right it's right in the teeth all right let's go leave me alone that's enough sparring for today oh he's following me walk over to the table he's literally following me get away from me [Applause] that was just like the me and my little brother were in a little bit of a fight before we came to dinner and we just got called to dinner and i was like i gotta get one more coming mom shut up idiot okay so now what are you following me around how do we open this open this open the door go to the table what table would you care for some refreshment but yeah move on young gary apple please pick up all of the items on this table cycle through your inventory to see the objects you have in your place apple when someone's object is displayed you may use it healing potions have something to eat if you wish then you may proceed the next test is waiting on the other side of the metal door okay i have a compass too do i use it oh it's just up the door is locked but the key from the table will open it to unlock the door select the key in your inventory center the door on screen until it lights up then use the key on the door good now head down this hallway to get to your next test what's the next test apples are nice well only one kind of apple is worth eating in my opinion well two green or macintosh the rest of the dog [ __ ] movement skills first climb the rope by jumping onto it move while looking up or down to climb up or down the rope so you can look up turn to change okay it's not s it's just w we'll release the rope now climb the rope to get to the top of the platform well done run and jump across the gap to the other side of the stream i feel like i'm not running fast enough is this how fast i can go jump this obstacle is easy to climb if you know how first move close to the wall next jump to grab the edge of the wall and pull yourself up good job i'm most pleased with your progress i just breathed on it all right if you wish you may stay to practice your climbing and jumping or swimming ducking leaning or crawling let's okay this ball doesn't finished you may return to your chambers by going through that red door farewell okay so it's jump let go all right let's do it the keepers were training me to be one of them and i found other uses for those oh [ __ ] mushroom eat it what is that what happened wait what what wait no i wanted to explore all right so now i'm an expert thief you didn't explode don't need to explore the tutorial well i just wanted to see i was just curious where are my parents i don't know the most promising acolyte left us not out of the lesser folly of sentiment but the greater folly of anger his heart was clouded and his balance was lost but his abilities were unmatched even then we knew to match watch him most carefully keeper stealing is wrong a simple job plan for this evening break into a guarded mansion breaking news another fat nobleman's priceless trinket steal a trinket and leave quietly lord baffert is out of town and rumor has it that the captain of his house guard went with him as a bodyguard the time is ripe for a bit of burglary all right the front gate of lord bafford's manner is always guarded and the main street is far too exposed sounds like the guy in hitman's free but cuddy tells me the constant better way in around to the side more out of the way one guard and likely no witnesses to complicate matters the piece cutting is burned silver jewels the usual adornments it should command a high price bafford like most of his kind probably keeps his treasures on the top floor of the place up floor close to his heart and far from his servants all i need just give me two bricks give me two bricks a extra large heel sketches of the place and everyone who's going to be asleep inside already is and a [ __ ] ski mask it's time to begin i'll get what you need i'll get up there and get that trinket [Music] sneak into lord bafford's manor and case the place well house in back is your best bet if you can get the key from the guard blackjacking or pickpocketing him would be quietest find the prized scepter and redistribute it to yourself try to do it without causing too much commotion [Music] all right so i gotta get into the manor there's a well house out the back i can get the key from the guard or just all right i gotta get in there starting gear i got a blackjack sword archery healing potion water arrow the water arrow does not do any damage but it douses torches and other burning okay that's really important what is blackjack this weapon will knock out an unsuspecting target with little noise and no blood oh okay all right let's go where am i watch okay watch for interior patrols there's the front entrance this is heavily guarded do not try frontal assault aerocache pickup on route to the second floor one guard this well leads to the basement basement entrance okay we're gonna try to go to the basement so i gotta go to the right here this way i drew this map i hope it helps is it illegal for me to just like be right here no i'm outta here i haven't done anything illegal no place for you all right i haven't done anything illegal though so like it's okay that i all right so that's the front door go in the front it's three guards i don't think let me try let me see let me go to the well it's a well out back there's a cheese factory i can't go in there all right here's the here's the underground well you can't fight all these people at once i mean i can but it's probably bad right where am i at this one guard i'm okay here's the well that's where i am right now so there's a guard here basement entrance a well leads to the basement waterway basement waterway i got it all right cool i have to save the game well that would have been a [ __ ] disaster was the uh blackjack all right like so this thing or this thing you just whack somebody's head all right let's go up to the basement is anybody here doesn't look like a basement what's this way oh okay this is where i am right now so i'm underground keep going thank god it tells you where you are okay basement there's a door oh [ __ ] hold on god damn it give me a break can i get in the store all right stealth stealth stealth stealth somebody's coming somebody's coming water water water water arrows water arrows oh [ __ ] how many times have to shoot somebody in their head before they die what how do i move the body oh my god all right dump them dump them down here okay i gotta get rid of the blood all right that's one guard all right save it f11 what's that what i can't go in here this i can't open this door i thought this is a place into the mansion wait a minute i need to figure out how do i put the other arrows on how do i do it who's in the options okay water at four so i just have it up four there we go all right so what if i if i do this i just need to test this and see what happens do anything what what the i want to get points this guy's drunk all right wait what do i do about this guy can you see me this is not very stealthy where's he going oh he's got the key he's got the key all right all right dump him all right i gotta did i take the key was it okay i was never here i got the key right yep nice hold down yeah i can do like a big swing can i take the beer i can oh it's a bottle oh oh don't do that i'm trying to drink it i try and drink it i'm trying to drink it oh my goodness slow down i can't just pick it up how do i just okay drop that's so loud i think i'm in oh here's the well all right let's bring this with us there's the well that was a tuber reaction it was genuine though all right so i have to go down the well am i gonna get hurt david all right so now i'm underneath the estate right this is all pre-recorded i'm just sitting back with my legs up on the desk my arms behind my head just relaxing while i watch this with you all right where am i at basement is coming up here what's that secret i don't know where i'm going to end up oh my god what is that thing wait is this this is that attack this evil are these evil these attack i feel like do these attack i'm i kind of i hate this get out of the water grab the edge and get out of the water get out of the water get out of the water oh get back in the water get back in the water get back in the water back in the water oh my god all right i got it i got it i got one this is how i actually treat when there's a spider in the house oh there's a chest over here since i'm in here i might as well pick up something for myself there's nothing in here waste of time what okay well i i got gold oh swim come on you have a time limit i don't have a time limit in that person for a day uh which way do i have to go forget throw a face cam yeah just i'll put it on a minute or maybe i won't i have to have face cam it's fun to use sometimes but you know whatever okay i gotta be careful now take out the uh take out the bludgeoner wait are these explosive these are explosive i think inside at last are they do they blow up doesn't look like it can i do anything with this stuff i'm making so much noise here okay you know what this is actually good because they're not going to investigate this because they just probably assume a raccoon is in here all right we're gonna get upstairs what do you mean what's wrong with us well we're fine but i've been thinking we should watch the that's stupid people don't really worry about their on the inside oops who's creeping around there i was trying to hit him in the face of the box don't worry i'll find you come find you i can't go anywhere what no i just made a problem for myself i can't clip through those come out and fight me go investigate that wait opportunity i'll get this guy in the head just make one little noise come on hot thief why won't he fight me hurry up run god damn it i knew it was a problem i have to be after this guy before he brings the alarm [ __ ] come on over here why is he so much faster than me i got him wait there's so much stuff over here hold on no i want the apple my health is okay oh nice alright money [Music] i gotta get these guys out of here what's that music for i'm so turned around though i don't even know where i was was that a shovel oh hell yeah wait come here [Music] that means guards are coming put him in the chest all right where am i i gotta get up from here save yeah yeah this isn't far cry dude i'm not treating it like far cry i would have gone on the front door oh goodness okay anybody patrol this all right slow down save guys my wendy's forgot special sauce what dude that's so that that's not cool what's that vase i want to hold on to this stuff i don't want to throw it okay was that all right where am i now i'm in here sneak into the manor okay steal the scepter with as little notice as possible there's another chest there i couldn't pick it up i could all right cool all right i just gotta find the way up what the hell ah who made that now they'll never know he's just sleeping yeah that guy's just sleeping in bed i gotta make it look not as bad though okay that's fine he's asleep oh is this an innocent person is it i loot their bodies they're all innocent who's there no someone there no no one's here that one's there oh well too many imaginings [Music] the humming makes that even better did you hear something no i think we're almost there yep let's go we're in yeah we're in this is up we gotta get to the second floor i got the bludgeoner did that shadow mess with me excuse me ah is it like resident evil can you like close the zombie out this is gonna be fun [ __ ] god damn it i'm fine i'm fine i'm fine i'm fine i'm fine i'm fine i'm fine everything's fine everything's fine everything's fine fine i gotta dump them you have no choice you must kill well i need to put him somewhere wait where am i [Music] what's happening i hear somebody nice all right we're good we're good we're good how long do they stay unconscious for oh god is there a torch in here mushroom where are they oh god where are they why are they getting closer is it dark right here dave where is this person we gotta get to the second floor euron made me smile um oh all right what'd i do oh god okay this looks this is like the kitchen all right there's the kitchen there's the chef what's he making the chef is making a delicious meal of apples i gotta knock you out man i'm sorry what was that what look there i hit the chandelier oh give me all these crunches i didn't kill him no i'm not going to be a weirdo i'm going to put him in a place where he's going to be he's going to wake up in a few hours and be it's everything i'll be fine i'm gonna hide him over here okay there's a note right here what's it say cedric please speak to cook about last night's dinner while technically the menu conformed to my instructions i suspect that the lamb was somewhat older than this springs and i am in no way fooled by his practice of warming the salad to disguise wilting if cook is incapable of finding adequate ingredients he can be replaced and if he offers those same excuses about the stone market shortages please remind him that the grocery budget is a good 50 above last year's figures and even he should be able to procure adequate uh victuals at those prices okay all we have is bread oh carrots bread a little mallet at least he's ooh a pan more cheese i need to i should probably eat some of this stuff does this heal i don't see it this isn't heal hope you're having fun i'm having fun oh i can't alt tab this game let me see okay i got it on my phone what the [ __ ] is all this man i get i'm not even gonna i'm not i'm not gonna react to this i'm not gonna react to it is it okay i'm gonna play thief i was playing thief i'm just playing a game of thief that's it that's it i'm gonna keep going what's that lisa well i i just i just browsed it for a second all right i i saw it what why i saw it they all right where am i now all right i gotta get up here into the interior courtyard it like a secret door oh nothing i thought these are coffins all right i gotta get upstairs what is all this are you mad at us i'm mad at you whoa i just stole a bunch of stuff okay cool hey what was that all right don't worry i'll find you how did i turn around though my neck just enlarged my neck just stretched like 13 feet ah stop it once and [ __ ] [ __ ] i'm dead [Music] how do we load f12 oh oh what what are you talking about what what are you talking about what are you talking about what i don't understand wasn't i saving it okay what i was gonna say that was like 30 minutes of progress all right i can't mess around this is where i was i get get out of the way i gotta get up the stairs steal some of this stuff all right slow down use your sword on the banners to cut them really okay i gotta be careful you can see me stay out of the light all right headshot this guy with a boner [Music] hello goddammit show make yourself like they used to whoa i need to throw something up there in the dark strange whoa that guy saw me oh [ __ ] oh [ __ ] oh [ __ ] what if i just stay hidden where is he why would you still be using your boat come on the stairs all right here's the second floor right here we got it oh they're coming in oh [ __ ] get him out of the light i think i'm okay i think i can go upstairs now i go where am i now all right where is this guy i'm almost in his quarters minecraft sounds these are minecraft sounds what's in here oh boy upstairs to the private chambers the bottom of the screen is light level nobody will see you if it's dark somebody had a lot of good advice there nothing oh wait nice okay you can load preset controls blackjack only works if they don't know you're there if you pick something up and it doesn't go in your inventory it's not worth anything expert is not harder just more objectives oh okay so you this only works if you you i have to they can't see me but if they don't see me is it an instant ko yes okay cool there's no it's up here i thought those are guards nothing up here it only works with the blackjack okay oh we got a goblet here nice does it say how much this stuff was worth at the end i just ate a lot of food what does that do what does food even do all right we gotta go up not down okay i cannot be seen right now okay i'm oh no no he's easy there's probably somebody in the courtyard all right we're fine don't just load thank god i saved and loaded the same exact time i think this is creepy what is this yeah all right walk on the carpet where am i alfred mansion's second floor throne room is right up here is he in the throne room it's like the big dining hall what is this it's like a secret room i'll [ __ ] you [Music] stay right here all right if he's already seen me does that mean can i still get him in one hit nothing here now yes okay good [Music] i'm just saving it every five steps what how is that possible no reload what's there there's an intruder here somebody's seeing me i'm making noise oh whatever i don't have to hit anybody let's just go okay so where where's my orientation here drone room is this way the tile floor is really loud yeah i have to go that way [Music] [ __ ] okay we're fine this is a big bath [Music] do you hear me go in the water oh great that's not good does he care i don't think he cares just don't move in the water i want to go inside of that thing but i don't want to oh boy you killed me in one hit are you kidding me what do i have for armor [Music] [Music] someone making noise hey stop no [ __ ] off i got it someone making noise didn't see me i'm fine where's this other guy ain't nobody here [Music] is it my going to the throne room i'm going back down oh my [ __ ] you jump from carpet to carpet will they hear me jumping all right water arrows so i can do this on torches you said right you got to use the rubber chicken with a pulley in the middle you asked for it that's just good to absolutely [ __ ] why did that scare me so much i didn't expect if he's gonna be that close to me this guy's got golden armor on swing at me please [Music] give me a goddamn break all right jump from place to place holy [ __ ] it worked it worked what a bunch of geniuses seriously [Music] get you in the dark all right i have the save it i have the key to the throne room now i wonder if he reads them or if it's just for sure recent delivery of antiquities from bonn contained several items which we felt might be of interest to you descriptions follow but you are welcome to drop by our shop to examine them or other goods in person an ornamental scepter three feet in length that's huge the body of the stave is weird carved in the star and dot pattern six inches of the fair rule and five inches of the grip are bound with burnished copper overlaid by an ink and glazed crackadare varnish it's pretty good looking i think cloud stone one of the finest of its type we have seen a treasure box of two feet by three feet of four feet by silver birch wood the lid isn't really pretty the inside of the box contains two principal compartments one with glass shelves and it's very it's expensive dog bone okay let's keep going [Music] where am i now i definitely have a key to the throne room healing potion key that's a big key where's the throne room though don't think enough dark souls to play be able to do this fk never mind where did he come from [Music] no don't shoot it can i how do i pull it back what happened i hit him in the leg and he died all right we're good all right i think i gotta go down that hallway let me see i can cut the banners i'm curious what that means what does that do i need the throne room now i'm on this edge i gotta go over here i wish i had an indicator of where it was it's probably the courtyard right press y to fart i mean i did it just curious i have a compass it's a grenade all right so what is the compass telling me to go so the compass is pointing in the direction i need to go or okay so is this north south east right am i is that correct so i gotta go this way right because this would be east the painted top is facing north right i've guys i haven't looked at a compass in probably 20 years i don't even care what they are this is pointing north so that means that if i'm going this way that i'm currently going east that's correct yes okay right i got it i got it i got it i got it all right so i gotta go there we go through that door yep okay here we go this is it is that's a throne right no it's a bad i thought it was okay from this angle it looked like a big throne got a lot of money though [Music] another key to what i don't know all right where am i now not the throne room okay it's another door on this side then this is a personal bedroom right here yup okay this is locked this is locked is he in here [Music] [Music] no you're the flash bomb wait [Music] i got him [Music] is that a gong don't touch that that's definitely like that's probably like an alarm all right i made it to the throne room it's a throne room how pretentious here it is i found the scepter okay scepter's right here here we go all right [Music] hell yeah i did it 30 minutes found 705 loot i picked one pocket zero knockouts out of wait zero knockouts how innocence killed some that's such a weird statistic it doesn't say how many innocents killed i don't know a few i was not paying attention i when i was writing down my debriefing i don't remember how many innocent people i killed so i just wrote some and others ah [Music] some and all there is i don't know whatever i don't know who they were [Music] that was kind of fun you didn't hit the gong i thought i didn't think i was going to end the mission right there i'm melting this down someone just called thief an unknown game that i dug up i got remade what four or five years ago and they kind of do a remake i think so [Music] i went to cuttings ten years ago i thought that was like two years ago his occupation it was 2014 really hopefully they'll never catch sight of me when i break him out of their prison which is what i'm going to do it's 2012. they're holding cuddy in a mining complex carved out of a quarry the quarries flooded but the hammers still work the top-level mines and have converted part of the complex into a penitentiary for those who violate their tenants your face came off of this one an associate of mine was confused that was weird i don't know what happened there with a map it would be difficult to get in by way of the main gate but there is another option the mines break the surface of a hill south of the quarry i'll drop into the mines and head for the airline check which got it found somewhere uphill into the north the hammers all right venture into these lower getting worse but it's okay because they're reputed to be haunted i'd rather not have to do this job but cuddy's a reliable fence and i don't appreciate the hammerites abducting him all right so i gotta break money for the bafford job break people out of uh jail oh your map doesn't show the way through the mine so you're gonna have to scout around and make your way to where they hold the prisoners cuddy still owes you for the baffert job break him out and you'll get your cash all right i'm back hold on let me like get the camera to look okay let me wait let me just get this done this is a dog bone hey how much is this i can buy this it's a tip it's 300 bucks and it reveals where the hammers are keeping cuddy speed potion this potion will greatly increase your speed for a little while i can just bunny hop former prisoner i thought i said in craigslist a former prisoner of craig's cleft says he has info about the haunted minds many arrows i have plenty of these moss arrow oh okay that's actually really helpful noise maker yeah i want those okay i think i'm all right is there anything maybe i should bind to the healing potion 250 i think it's worth it i buy it it's worth it your cash does not carry over between missions it does not so should i just just buy everything okay so there's no point so you give me that hot tip i wanna know exactly where he is give me the hot tip and give me a potion and how many arrows do i need maybe a couple more of these moss arrows 30 cents all right i think that's good spend it all all right yeah that's good to know all right this one i'm gonna save it right here i'm gonna do a like a hard save let me get my camera to work because the camera is like all buggy right now hold on let me turn on the ring light i got i've got a ring light okay how does that look that look better or worse needs to be a little bit brighter like that looks all right the better there look i've got i've got my ring light on now okay does that look fine do we look okay put it around i'm not putting the ring light around my neck it's not happening no maybe if i can confirm that it's gonna be safe i'll do it all right you get face game for a half of one mission that's it here we go i hope i didn't need that one full mission oh no there is no deal i just turned it on and the white balance is wrong anyways who cares let me fix that quick it resets my camera settings every time i start it's better now there we go that's like what actually that's what it looks like in this room right now like that okay that's fine is it a blue light i i did i didn't even whatever i don't care let's just go all right i gotta go through the mines and i gotta find the i gotta find the person i gotta break the person up i smash somebody's head with a boulder i hope so we're gonna try it there's such a bostonian not anymore i i've been not in massachusetts for quite a while now swim down so the goal is to get through i think i'm gonna turn the right what happened here [Music] that i deserve i did not re i didn't know what was going on there okay give me my boulder back it was a pro all right it's marked on the map where he is right mine's prison factory it's like dante's inferno these are the layers of hell it's these are the layers what's this i thought that was an enemy i thought that was a person coming to get me what does that do i slash this what does this do put water arrows in it that's not a bad idea holy waters will kill zombies there are no zombies in this game there are zombies in this game [Music] didn't do anything that didn't do anything was that was the was the water factory there it is do i have to like bless myself all right i'm blessed it only lasts for 30 seconds it doesn't kill and what holy [ __ ] what do i do about this we're gonna get up there somehow i'm gonna turn the game up i'm gonna turn the game up i think is that safe to go down there i'm gonna turn the game i'm gonna turn the game up i'll turn the game up it's probably better right i have more i even i this is cheating probably but i don't care it's a mind to lean over edges and look down i think i'm supposed to go down here up i guess how high should i go already dead right there david that guy a zombie i think so yeah and i just okay can i kill him like with the sword is this the zombie why he's just breathing yo what happened is he dead i knew somebody was right near me what happened what it's not even [ __ ] scary relax don't overreact for no reason over actor overreacting i thought that was him breathing i can't hurt him okay bad are you gonna give me a dead end they're taking up the exact space that i need to run around them i still have a grenade [Music] what is happening in this game okay this is a haunted house now all right i'm okay i gotta keep going up keep going north i guess or up i hear i hear humans i hear human life seek to learn about gold and politics not honest craft to be their loss when they come of age and know not how to accomplish art of consequence you get one little measly health back for a [ __ ] 300 health potion [Music] i have those noise arrows right let me okay let me use them moss arrow noise arrow who is there i hear thee there where hast thou gone quiet [Music] he's right there all right i can get him right now hmm i thought i spied something hiding shallow i threw a shovel at him and he didn't even care okay it takes care of those two where am i at i gotta go up this uh i can go up that way but what's over here um this is a secret or something something i can get i'll check it why not oh it's like this different entrance i swim up it like a salmon no okay so this is another way to get down here excuse me what's this too far too far too far too far i'm gonna get lost if i don't cut it out guards had keys i think i got them i didn't get the keys i thought when i picked them up it would just give it to me according to dickit a heretic who was recently let out of craigslist cuddies being held in cell block four okay so he's in cell block four they had keys i didn't take oh [ __ ] okay i thought i was gonna just pick it up on their body and not get his key anymore where is it i don't know dave it was just the potion all right so cell block four here we are careful guard stations all right control room machine rooms power stations to the mine so we're going through and we're going to be in the control room we're going to get to the prison all right [ __ ] you idiot you idiot it's dark right here he can't see me who pecks is there needs must i come my nose what are you saying [Music] you have anything on you a key or anything no all right move this [ __ ] out of the way mine there's a okay i need those arrows right now oh [ __ ] he didn't see it i don't [Music] oh [Music] all right i'm good i'm going to go go go he can't i'm in pitch black right now you can't see me [Music] like this steam engine over there is masking my sounds all right come on this way [Music] i better tread softly all right toss him in the corner okay that's the only thing i can press i thought i was gonna shock the floor i thought i was gonna just electrocute the ground and this that was so loud my ears hurt okay machine rooms control room we got to go up here okay get to the prison that's that's all i gotta do save it right here why you like this because i have attention deficit hyperactivity disorder and i'm like irrational and compulsive uh very high strong neurotic i don't know that's why and i'm like being cut off nice excuse i know it's not an excuse it really isn't i know i said neurotic not erotic open your ears are there people down here because this is a this is the oh this is the way to get to the factory i'm into the uh prison this is a i'm not erotic why does that not work what am i dumping what happened what happened why somebody screamed what it was me screaming i was not even close all right let's [ __ ] take out some people here let's turn him into hot [ __ ] magma come on over here come on over here come on over here come on over here coward hey look he flipped me off where is he what what is that [Music] where you go oh somebody's bleeding got him oh i got i got a hammer what do i do with this what do i do with the hammer is somebody still alive [Music] oh i got two hammers all right what does this one make this one also makes hammers no i don't want any of this give me the just give me the hammer [Music] i tried to jump over it all right no more messing around [ __ ] idiot he's up here be wary vigilant you shall be avenged cease thy hiding craven oh [ __ ] [Music] to me [Music] [ __ ] you come on dude don't even springs a hammer like this with one hand like up that you can't even do that move that move isn't even possible you can't take a huge two-handed hammer and go like this and have it hit me right square in the front of the nose [Music] i got an idea mad cause bad new yeah i saw removed all is quiet now my imagination does run over much um uh i thought i spied something it all seems peaceful now i heard you guys have anything on you no do my eyes show me her right a plague of these rats rats just rats that guy was singing [Music] uh right he's hidden i think there's one more guy here the prison did i make one of these things though i feel like i need to take one of these [Music] in truth i have never heard such carrying on as this thief's pawned cuddy one would think these scum had never faced tribulation in their lives what there's nobody no you're not looking what you don't look over here why would you be like in time i believe that thief uh cutty's friend uh has some why would you be doing that you're just having a conversation there's no way you're as fast as me be hopping bro i'm sorry there's no way one stroke my brother you stupid game whatever what are you mad at somebody i'm just saying if you have okay if you and i are having a conversation we're just talking yes okay you you're right here like this whole space like this spot over here in the corner i am not going to if i see like a squirrel move over there i'm not going to immediately take a sword out and run over there we're in the middle of a conversation i'm not just going to appear that way and go after whatever it is no it's not going to happen they're prison guards i have never heard such carrying on as this thief's pawned cuddy one would think these scum had never faced tribulation in their lives for a time i thought who is there we didn't even know i was there [Music] the truth i have never heard such carrying on as this thief's pawned cutty one would think these scum had never faced tribulation in their lives for a time i thought block four might never sleep again for his are you telling me that they're prison guards germa they're prison guards they're guards germany they're prison guards i just threw one of those nerf remember you know those nerfs whistlers the thing that like brett favre was in the commercial he threw it like look there's i can throw this 100 yards and it goes i just threw one of those right next to them and they didn't even hear it i just whipped one of those and you're telling me that they're aren't they supposed to be aware it's coughs but he quiets now good death or doran's twill be the same [Music] no reaction where hast thou gone the snake shows himself just restart [Music] in truth i have never heard such carrying on as this thief's pawned cutty one would think these scum had never faced tribulation in their lives for a time i thought block four might never sleep again for his coughs but he quiets now why are they doing this good death orders will be the same for him in the end [Music] all right let's go [Music] my sin has brought my death [Music] why what happened [Music] i'm confused what just happened this guy didn't see me it was a medieval security camera who saw me i don't get it if the foundation is weak this is like a little thing like going like this so shall it be with all my children whether they be stone or flesh who can see me right now come closer [Music] they didn't even have sound effects like this back then what what it's in the ceiling no it's not [Music] that's what's seeing me i thought you guys were making it up i thought that was a i thought that was a joke there's a medieval security camera so what am i supposed to do about that i guess put this out can it can it see in the dark okay i can't go this way [Music] i thought i could get him i thought i'd just go into the i shall window thee my hiding place [Music] so can i go under here and then above i guess i can wrap around maybe go up i don't know it's steampunk you know steampunk is like the jedi hand wave for all fiction passes there hmm steampunk i would not have thought therefore it's fine their teeth against the builders steampunk therefore it's fine [Music] oh [ __ ] oh [ __ ] okay all right very clearly that guy's got a key use the walk button i'm thinking about just running in [Music] somebody comes up here in patrols and i need to be aware that just rush in i can't just rush in i think i can [Music] he heard you walk i think i have to go down to the sewer as much as i don't want to okay this guy's coming over here i'll knock this guy out in the corner the light goes out for a minute it does one two three i see the feet [Music] [Music] gargling in the mirror what is that oh who goes nobody nobody goes a plague on these rats how when do i go oh that's not that much time at all one two one two three go who comes on to me save it save it all is at rest now block four [Music] i need my hot uh tip according to a heretic who was recently let out of craig's cleft cudi is being held in cell block four how do i distract this guy [Music] i hear somebody coming over here oh god oh god what do i do what do i do oh god what do i do let me know open the door open out here [Music] be good [Music] where is this guy [Music] oh [ __ ] [Music] no way no way what is going on over there no turn it off turn it off turn it off [Music] kill this [ __ ] what [Music] it was just kidding i was just testing to see if it worked we were just having an electrical test to see if uh if it worked or not if we was having an electrical test [Music] [Applause] [Music] get out of the [ __ ] way he's in the way [Music] the builder shouts by the if i cannot think you gotta be kidding me he's gonna go i'm gonna go channel jail he's kidding me oh run away coward run away coward all right no more alex jones he's oh oh yeah you guys can't get in there now can i [Music] [Applause] [Music] you didn't think i was gonna be able to get in and get you did you comes down to me i'm beset ah now you can't get in now i can stay here awesome lady taker piece of vandal uh wills number six cuddy [Music] how do i turn this off [Music] how do i turn this off [Music] good luck it's kind of crazy out there that guy's gonna get [ __ ] grabbed [Music] we're six hey cuddy come on come with me we gotta get out of here immediately my money speak into my ear disappointed good thing you're dying cuddy [Applause] [Music] left me as notes the hammers got put them in there evidence box loot collection more like stairs officers i'm imagining the guy that ran out first in passage they're all gonna just pile on top of that guy and like he's the bad guy he's the one that broke out he caused all this what happened to you what what what's wrong with him [Music] uh uh was that supposed to happen i'll get him out what's the new objective i failed this one okay find the evidence locker and retrieve felix's map all right evidence locker oh yeah yeah off okay barracks and officers quarters we're gonna go this way [Music] do i save it i feel like i shouldn't [Music] oh get out of here [Music] [Applause] [Music] level two all right i'm in level two guards i i couldn't hear anything from that cutscene because the blaring open the door [Music] how do i turn the alarm off i need the key leave the corpse what is this what kind of line what a weird door what that's okay [Music] just in case [ __ ] hits the absolute fan i have a save point back there all right i need to find the map in the officer's quarters find the evidence locker evidence locker i shall find the encrusty nothing in there all right [ __ ] hold on wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait why does the prison have door locks i don't know scream really loud when i walk over this way so the guard will come over and i'll knock him out cease thy gains and face me [Music] what was that dead hey excellent job i was thinking about it no i can't like zoom out though so oh oh you don't do that scare me like that you're pretending to hold a weapon he's walking around holding a fake weapon get out of here all right get out go for it [Music] let's get out of here everybody get out everybody get out nevermind for himself where's the guard quarters seize thy games and face me no we can take them we can take them we can take them uh [Applause] [Music] i don't know why i did that i just pressed it like an idiot okay all right all right all right where's the guards quarters over here [Music] you hard you're smart this is the smart one [Music] you need a weapon you don't have a weapon you don't have a weapon you don't you need to get away from me though you have to leave me alone yes it's good to see you very nice to meet you this guy okay save me there's someone here stay with me oh stay with me [Music] assassin [Music] what i just let him out of prison i just broke him out of prison and he's screaming assassin i'm sorry that was [ __ ] up the builder shall guide me to thee all right we're i got a barracks in officers quarters wait what i can write on this okay i'm gonna head this way so i have to go down and then across i don't know where the hell i'm going i need to drink a health potion though officers quarters officers cell block one officer's quarters all right cell block one which is across the way i think can i just [Music] go through this door all right so block three i gotta get the cell block one cell block one was on the other side [ __ ] and how explain to me how you saw me you piece of crap my death is it huh [Music] [Music] don't hit your head on the ceiling so block one one one one one what's your last warning leave me the [ __ ] alone leave me alone this guy chased me what's the aggro range leave me a get away from me leave me alone this guy is seriously a superhero get away from me this must be how they spend all those tithes shall not hide forever thou shalt not hide forever why would i even start guide [Music] [Music] i know where to go [Music] do no emotion this is a stream sniper no emotion should i do no more i can't i'm just trying to concentrate this game is hard stop singing why is everybody sing all right here we go i don't have somebody chasing me now i can get to sell block one from here scary game it's kind of scary all right here we go get through this wait till it turns off you got like a two second window one that was did you see that bait what was that [Music] okay oh my goodness i'm fine all right save it right here drink a health potion i'm ready to go you just heard me gulp that you just heard me drink you got to be kidding me that would be so scary if you're just in like a pitch black area and all you hear is this [Music] okay save it here tell block one and to the barracks [Music] all right no more alarm finally i can take this guy up what hap what's going on what now can't stay in shadows forever did he just turn the alarm back on i think he's got himself stuck [Music] we're good cell block one is this way crank this over here so nobody hears it i gotta go get the map okay up here barracks offers this quarter straight ahead i just have to sneak through with the shadows is that we could bad gamer neck there for a second here we go the barracks leave it again [Music] all right where are we at is it in here a carpet copper copper copper could be how they spend all those times i didn't want to pick this [Music] [Music] who was that guy with the scepter of righteousness has just been forged anything on you oh [ __ ] nice there's tons of stuff in here nothing all right i'm gonna this is these are all the guards quarters knife i wonder if i have time to stop for a snack all right looking for the map now wherever that is hold on i came in through here [Music] how do i not have full health after eating all that all right i explored all the quarters here we go i don't know who this person was [Music] i'm coming and throwing i'm gonna throw the knife in his neck i think i can edit from here nope but it don't matter i'll get him he just like baited me but i still hit him in the head okay i don't even know who this person is does he have a key or something it doesn't look like it he's throwing it handle first it's not gonna kill anybody [Music] somebody walking all right where's this map find the evidence locker and retrieve the evidence locker in the am i going too far this guy's got magical powers thinkest thou that harmed me diarrhea must be stronger to attack me my armor is proof against the lights of thee think as though that harmed me my armor is proof against the light there's a lot of talking but he's got magic powers [Music] this is a spell book when i was called thou taunt of hearth in a roof beam when i was hungry thou taught of pot and cauldron when i was beset by foes thou taught of spear and shield i hammer pounds thy nail holds the roof beam thy hammer strikes the iron shapes the cauldron thy hammer in my hand onto my foes i think i had fire powers these magic potions okay wait a minute do i need to bring a hammer here in front of the door i hope not still walking around here but hopefully i'm about to get to the next part or these hammers [Music] oh i found a hammer [Music] by the builder show thyself what [Music] cuddy won't be needing this anymore holy [ __ ] diamonds oh i got it all right i got it that's it was right there all right i couldn't save cuddy i think that's scripted though [Music] i was loud and the man fools piled rock on rocks and raised to tracy roof hammer saws tear the skin of goodsy wood and laughs at the woodsy lord and when learns of the lord of this he sends his beasties to the man fools who attacks and hammer saws their useless flesh and build him a house of thy rotting skins i was pissed at cuddy for a good while after the prison debacle but hey you're gonna like stand up and play him for what the hammers did do you like stuck so i decided to go after that horn felix talked about not like i had a whole lot of choice really the rent is due landlord's landslides hammers man the map's pretty specific about where the entrance is too bad it's not as clear about where the horn is felix did some scrounging before he left and his notes say the horn is in the tomb of some nobles the quintus family guess i'll just have to explore felix always helpful also said that the catacombs are supposed to be haunted great i'll go make some inquiries about where a heretic like me can get some holy water always go prepared filthy man thing uh maybe should i go pee should we take a pee break search through the ancient bone horde and procure the legendary horn of quintus let me just get a good save point here oh wait let me spend some money these are pretty useful so i want some that's way too expensive never mind i'd rather have the alarm get set off than spend that much money water arrows 50 rope arrows okay i want health it's so much more important to me holy water this vial of hammer sanctified liquid is potent protection against the undead when used on your water arrows i have a few of them maybe i'll get more of these yeah okay i don't wanna i gotta be careful the money's about previous missions that's pretty cool this game is fun i like this game i'm going to save it right here i'm going to take a quick break i'll be right back you know it's not i know it's like january 10th or whatever how about the christmas one one more time what do you think christmas morning one more time yeah yeah yeah yeah all right i'll see you guys in two minutes i'm gonna go pee real quick grab some water see you guys in a minute oops all right we're good hear me so [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] so [Music] do [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] do so [Music] i have returned how are you doing are you a raiders fan ever since you went to vegas um i never really was a football fan to begin with but i think it's cool i really kind of feel bad for uh for oakland though because vegas took the raiders and vegas might take the a's too though that's kind of i feel bad for oakland oh we're doing sports talk now this is a prime 90s pc boomer game how did you not play it yet ah i'm telling you it's been installed for like years i just i had to decide on a day to do it and i just put it in the poll [Music] all right let's do it did you wash your hands i always wash my hands always [Music] they can do thief two and thief three as well i don't know that's actually a pretty good question it really depends on how much i enjoy this one which so far i think it's pretty fun the scary music back up back to this [Music] thief's two thief two is this but better okay reboot is trash don't play it um i kind of wanted to play this one anyways [Music] added to the list of old pc boomer games that's right face cam or outrage wait a minute [Music] there all right so this one what are we gonna do find the horn of quintus that's all the info i got i have nothing else to go on this guy's to get up yup who cares though what do i really care just i'm just going to go right like he's going to that was just a jump scare that didn't happen kind of creepy all right do you have any notes mario family halls of echoing repose hammer right crips quintus family so we're gonna go down down and north [Music] i guess it's a long way down you die from this watch it i need should i kill this thing with holy water probably right oh yeah fire [Music] anybody else quick i only have 19 seconds anybody else down here [Music] oh there's a goblet though nice all right oh [ __ ] no that's bad i thought i was touching this reload i thought i was okay sorry about that [ __ ] idiot all right here we go third time's a charm [Music] shoot the arrow please okay anybody else down here i don't think so [Music] 15 seconds any other enemies come on that's weird three seconds nothing all right so i guess i'm gonna keep going gargoyle wall all right diving board what are your thoughts on alaris alaris does that mean anything i'm still in the upper vaults oh very useful all right i got 30 seconds now i'm gonna be some monsters right here guaranteed trap door don't stand on that uh i thought it was gonna fall this is gonna be over my head i got it so wait okay will this shoot over my head it is okay what is this is this just a depressing box i think so okay i thought it was gonna fall well that's why i need the holy water i've got to go back and get it because it's free here we go save it and all right well i got you rabbit all right nothing else in here why is the body exploding so fun i don't know it just is something about it uh okay upper vaults north i go down here or deeper into the crips what do you think how is it not funny i know it just is there any other holy water things over here these are both going to get up guaranteed let me just see if this there might be a well right here no there's not all right well do i need to kill these things or can i just run away yeah there's no reason to just leave just leave right let's go in here neck light what let me neck light have i ever won an apron before uh maybe like i was barbecuing it like i was probably barbecuing somewhere thinking i was funny like oh here i am the chef nobody wants to be that guy by the way you know how much panic i have if i ever am the guy that con is in charge of the grill the whole time i'm just like everyone's going to get poisoned is that cooked enough i'm going to kill somebody shh is that too red in the middle someone's going to die someone's going to die someone's gonna get too sick no just make and then i overcook everything i have to kill this guy that's raw no i those chicken wings are raw i can't serve them and then i always if i'm ever like in charge of if i anytime you cook anything i always like want to eat it first like i'm gonna be my own tester for my own food right you missed they're like yeah the food the food's not ready yet hey when do you think the food's going to be ready well maybe 20 minutes we'll see because like if i have i'm like if i get sick then i know right don't nobody eat it what was even in here you just ate raw food no i'm just saying i i always want to make sure i don't make anybody sick or anything and it's it can be really where am i [Music] wait did i just go in a circle whenever you're the guy at the grill and you have like 15 hamburger patties on there it can be i don't know it's you can't really focus on one patty so you have to really make sure that everything is cooked correctly and everything's why are you guys saying neck light i don't get this what are you doing back in the water put the the light on your neck it's not gonna fit okay no no i gotta go back down now you guys are gonna it's gonna turn into a cartoon this way do i have enough breath to do this where's this taking me it'll fit trust me i'm an engineer where the am i going leave it open so you know where you've been where the hell am i supposed to go all right i went right and down so now i'm going to go over over here sleigh bells this is kind of creepy all right wait i see i see the cannon yeah you think you're so funny nope sorry i think i just drank all my potions and i didn't [Applause] okay that'll get through here you promised all of pickers i did it in the very beginning of the stream and it was stupid i couldn't even get three on my hand you all right we're going down to wherever likes i guess we're going down here oh don't touch that right is this gonna do something if i touch it this looks lower right there's a lip here does that mean anything probably not mushrooms i can't pick them up this is this was a castle griffin steed what is that thing what is that thing i gotta try to drop this on his head i'm bi again this is it can you hurt enemies with this stuff that i don't like those sounds [Laughter] relax shut up this hurt this looks like one of those guys in those inflatable t-rex costumes [Music] it's like a pig and a i don't want to hurt it i don't i wish i could just say i'm not gonna hurt you but it's not gonna let me pass duck jump i'm sorry i had to it's because you threw a boulder at it i don't know it was trying to get me i'm curling i'm coloring a cat coloring book what's your favorite cat um i don't know my cats are cool oh [ __ ] hiccups the whole family um okay where am i why is there a little arrow scratched over here what i'm gonna follow the arrow i'm kind of scared to do this okay well i still don't know where i am okay i think i made it is this it watch out there's all these things everywhere be careful if i crouch it's fine right yeah just stay crotched ah the bat boom this don't push that down all right we got cheese excuse me what oh he's right ed roll what's this stuff it's dinosaur teeth or something what are those speed potion fire arrow is oh nice all right cool all right be careful here getting out so all right nice that got me that so now i gotta go the other way right yeah you throw up on stream chat no i'm not gonna throw up on stream huh vomit's all over the place glad you thought it was funny okay so now i got i gotta take these i gotta change pants i don't understand the concept here of like climbing i think just to hold it i could be ready i'm all over the place here where yeah where am i actually going down okay there's dinosaurs down here i don't want i want to try to avoid them if i can fire arrows on the dinosaurs try it wait did i kill that no i didn't where am i supposed to go here let's go up they're not gonna get up right they're dead there we go this is such a maze i heard ooh that's it are you kidding me that's it why are you so mad i'm not eat the shrooms i think they're just light shrooms i don't think they're actual shroom shrooms i don't think i can eat them i gotta turn this up people saying follow the music that was a pig that was clearly a pig that was that you know that pig sound the default pig sound all right up here ah that's why i don't put the two goddamn headphones in get up [Music] climb up here oh now i'm back here all right get away from me [ __ ] [ __ ] oh my god [Laughter] get away from me i'm gonna die i'm gonna die i'm gonna die you gotta be cute how did he get up here how did they get up here they can't get up here i missed again i missed again and went all the way to the back i'm gonna dive right now i can't believe that just happened i can't believe it you've got to be kidding me i don't even know where the save is not that bad how did it miss there were three in the and all my field of vision that's so unfortunate oh well it got so much of my mouth go change your pants now bear it that's the worst gamer moment uh i mean that's that was bad but that wasn't even my fault though that was such [ __ ] i you saw like the hitbox got weird i it just missed and i don't even know how it missed i don't know where i am right now but i'm just gonna grab onto this and go up and i think i just found it accidentally did i just find it i just found where i need to go i didn't he's still alive this is a sick mcdonald's ceiling it's like not even it's not even close i mean it's kind of close but not really not enough for you to say that i don't think there's anything here all right i gotta get through that there's nothing else here i can do can i take something push something no secret returns into the joker wait a minute [Music] it works on monsters that good to know very good to know that the the little bludgeoner works on huge monsters all right time to get turned around a million times again follow the music i feel like i was on the right track it works on anything that's alive okay good to know that's funny yup i remember getting the jewel here all the put music both headphones i hate doing that i hate it i don't like it it's too immersive what's wrong with being immersed i'm not aware of my surroundings i don't hear any music all right i gotta start burning this into memory here odd watches skip don't skip you need to help me i hear the music now okay this is where i got messed up last time [Music] nice burp oh i thought that was me hold up shut up shut up shut up shut up music music come on get up there how do i get that is it saying go down oh um over there do a rope arrow over there music's in this room tombs with piped in music how classy these zombies are these people it's hard to tell [Music] go go go go go go go golden arm golden right how do i get out i got a goal enough [Music] how do i get out how do i get out how do i get out oh this felix you don't look so good eat him not me eat him eat him not me all right how do i get out of here the horn is somewhere down here oh my god i'm actually in the horn room i need to heal golden arm oh i was just frozen in fear i couldn't do anything i was just frozen oh [ __ ] [Music] shut up everybody all right let's go bro [Music] [Music] ah no i'm trapped i'm trapped okay [ __ ] this i'm out of here i'm just going to bunny hop through the whole thing what's in here what's in here what's in here oh i already got it i got it i'm good he sucks i another golden arm never mind i keep hearing the horn i'm gonna go up stop [ __ ] breathing in my ear it's like asmr leave me the [ __ ] alone he takes a sip and he goes [Music] why would you jump off [Music] i don't like this level i really don't i don't like this level i'm trying to jump onto the stupid platforms over there oh my god oh freak oh my freaking god why would i jump off i'm not jumping up i'm trying i'm trying to get off the ladder i can't just walk forward i have to jump like that holding over to your life what do i do do i let go space should i let go of space i think if i let go space i pull myself up right [Music] weird dinosaur raptor guard all right big noise [Music] wow got him did i find a door i got a door you ow my head oh i can't open this come on so what am i doing up here [ __ ] clean your face you're a little bit sweaty this way i only have two earbuds and so i can tell where this horn is the game is too dark [Music] i'm it's dark i know i'm trying to make it brighter [Music] by the way why is it doing this it is dark isn't it i don't know why it's so dark that better better that's better yeah it's meant to be dark i know but like where come on we're gamers and streamers i want to be able to see all right honest to god i'm i think i have to go back down wait no i don't check this [ __ ] out we're going to donkey kong country this [ __ ] right now there's a rope [Music] where's the rope rope arrow [Music] this doesn't work it only it doesn't i want to reload then because that sucks it only works on wood oh that's annoying that's annoying all right i gotta go back down get the arrows ready [Music] go down the ladder what is all this hold on ladder right there too crickets nope are we drinking up here what's the point of this the house they have they can't just be for no reason has to be a point do this right what's the point for realism to avoid enemies hey hey hey somebody shooting arrows at me who's shooting arrows i hear arrows firing at me i don't know what direction don't go down there okay they're going around in a circle oh wait what'd i do that for this is a giant circle what do i do wait hold on here we go [Music] oh this place is so confusing this place is so confusing i go over here like the music's getting louder um ah i'm trying to just [ __ ] run by him what's that say quinn quintus i made it i made it i made it here i gotta get it safe everyone be quiet my mother's trying to sleep turn turn my volume down turn me down good thing i'm not afraid of heights i was trying to fight whatever [Music] okay i can take this out now i was trying to match the guy's speech climb the ladder you dumb get the holy water ready [Music] okay we're fine [Music] i knew it was gonna happen it's so wonky to jump off the ladder why is beard germa so mean i'm i'm not i'm not mean what are you talking about i'm just chilling around [Music] i'm right there just do it [Music] is there ever a game that's gotten ladders right [Music] [Music] um oh dark souls dark souls ladders were fine because you didn't i have to kind of first person stick on them there we go you actually climbed them so your character was just on it you know but in fps where you have to attach to a ladder and get off of a ladder i don't i don't think it's possible to make that good i don't [Music] it's such an awkward movement just by def you think wait you can snipe me from down there [Music] there it is [Music] go up thank you [Music] now what did i win [Music] find the horn of quintus got it the ancient corruption was again contained do more would have upset the balance but we knew to remain ever vigilant lest it resurface neither the hammers nor the pagans could be trusted not to meddle paper annals i had some money to spare after disposing of the horn so it seemed time to invest in some new tools marcus one of the few merchants willing to risk selling to an independent like me and his prices are steep but the other choice is to let one of the soakers see any wardens give me orders and take a cut of my profits they've been after me for years to join one of their stables but i'm not interested maybe they'll get the idea and give up more likely they'll just ramp up the threats nothing i can't handle if i'm careful and lucky and my luck seems to have finally turned for the better where are we going now now that you've got the finest in lockpicks you can go after more challenging and lucrative targets how about the local hammer temple get at least a thousand loot okay cool so i got lock picks gotta steal a bunch of loot i got a lot of money the fire arrows are explosions they're so loud and annoying [Music] i want at least a couple health potions i take more moss i don't use them though playing on normal yeah i'm a normal gamer the water arrows maybe i'll take a couple they're expensive though fine i'll i'll take one fire arrow and then a moss arrow and then just more of these sure all right sounds good okay here we go let me save it get uh i'll get back here for you guys save the game a hard save slot okay how are we that shot was meant for me yes i'm sure there was garrett in the window what let's head back now these creeps are going to lead me right back to whoever sent them to kill me oh my god free stuff why did i buy anything why did i buy anything i have a this is all free oh my goodness oh leave that's a lot of stuff okay what about this anything else in here all right so now i gotta i gotta trail the thugs who just tried to assassinate you without being detected where'd they go i don't know where the hell they are in here i don't i don't know i was busy stealing everything oh well i'll find him down here i guess i lost their trail oh they came down here what happened to me did i just like i die oh i thought i got like [ __ ] like close to a giant trap and it instantly killed me i thought like i got sniped or something all right um so i need to open up that hard save then hold on oh what are you doing you idiot all right i gotta go quick that shot was meant for me yes i'm sure there was garrett in the window he's dead let's head back now these creeps are going to lead me right back to whoever sent them to kill me is that microsoft network noises i'm noticing me all right stay silent stay quiet msn sounds msn chat that's so stupid oh i'm fine whatever no you i don't want to watch this guy die again all right go go let's head back here you're dumb i was reading chats but only if i could tell them nothing now hail them if explosion arrow is ready explosion arrows at the ready funny joke he was doing the same no one is following you relax they go where they go where'd they go where'd they go where'd they go where'd they go where'd they go where'd they go where'd they go where'd they go i didn't i didn't see where they went [Music] so wait moss arrows happening [ __ ] where'd it go oh wait which is going in a big circle it's gonna be loud moss arrows someone behind us just the wind i guess why do they keep stopping he's having an allergic reaction to the game what are you talking about the spirit where they go what over here ah you can't see me it's dark idiot how this is this is long this is really ramirez's boys i think it's time i dealt with mr ramirez once and for all okay tell me the hammers are gonna close down crime yeah he's tapping you where are they gonna put the poor saps they grab dunno awesome and do uh well or something his ass is too big just don't have enough diet no more kind of sad it used to be the power yeah they're just a bunch of guys wishing for the old days hey hey kick his body up what are you thinking take his body and throw it over here all right i'm in hey i think i saw something over here hello anyone there hey these soft these are soft sounds right let's pitch black right here what do i have what's my mission time to show ramirez who the real criminal mastermind is break into his mansion and take what he values most his wealth the purse from his belt should make the point loot the mansion all right i just need to get a lot of money not going that way must have been imagining things hello show yourself with that key this guy's got a key everybody coming oh [ __ ] oh [ __ ] don't go just wait it's fine it's not for this door oh my gosh i thought i was gonna throw it further come on you where'd you come from it doesn't work on this door i have to get through here i have to get through it try another shape i want to be able to hide in here really steal the paintings is it the dana devito guy from hercules who is that come on something secret back here oh wait i do have other shapes you're right all right something there show yourself stop i'm not you can't see [ __ ] leave me alone can i take out the all right i'm throwing a flashbang over there is someone there everybody close your eyes close your eyes close your eyes close your eyes close your eyes stop seeing me i'm going a different way those flashbangs are so bright a fair warning if i use those flashbangs they're gonna be horrible so just be prepared for them i'll try to give you warning i'll say close your eyes close your eyes close your eyes hey what was that close right everybody close your eyes no i stopped open your eyes i'm not gonna use it will they see this or hear this someone's searching for something and we'll get the tab for it this guards everywhere in this mission oh my goodness how am i going to do this lowercase scream like oh my god hey hi everybody hi i'm a thief nobody can stop me what are you gonna do about it everybody close your eyes close your eyes close your eyes close your eyes close your eyes one two three hey i went the wrong way i'm good uh all right i'm done i'm not this is the guard quarters don't open that door door's stuck how much do i have so far how much i stolen none all right there's got to be some expensive [ __ ] up here right give me a break look at look at how expensive this carpet is here we go what's in here something valuables bingo lord ramirez the reinforced walls and steel door have been day doodly installed about your accounting room but i must warn you that we cannot guarantee them against brick tunneling if you do not move the creatures out of the basement into a more distant area we cannot be held responsible for the potential damages all right this valuables over here anything in there i don't know how much do i have so far i need a thousand all right i got a hundred bucks right now i need like nine more items there's a look for hidden panels on the walls i don't see anything in here all right not a bad start let's go he's walking ooh a rare painting no that's a that's a chair i thought it was a painting hold on why do you have nothing you have why do you have nothing really keep going where am i i'm on the second floor i could go down into the basement and go kind of into his private counting chambers okay this topic away let me check that out of the room why does your mic have an echo it shouldn't have an echo all right i open this door with a key lock pick ooh is that working i don't know what's happening here got it i guess hold it oh all right private stash we got what open there's nothing even in here don't press that button that's that that's the diet coke button expensive very expensive stuff what was that 200 oh well i don't need that now richard day in i know it's pleasure that again one of my tough boys has been taken to craig's cleft may i remind you of the substantial donations i make to your office such that i may pursue business unhindered by idle scrutiny may remind you as well of your predecessor's unfortunate end the rivers are so treacherous this time of year i trust that you will attend to here to this and if the hammers are too difficult for your policemen i trust as well that you'll let me know okay here's something private book stash or something what is this what is this plate this is weird that looks expensive oh my goodness very expensive nice can i get in there how much more do i need i'm gonna pick up yep all right okay i'm collecting money i'm doing all right i'll find you where who damn you oh who's running i hear somebody somebody up there next to the gigantic explosive barrel i can jump in that window i wonder if i should try it now worth doing i can get it nice okay so what do i do with this what's the point of all this what did i just do that for uh what was this for lock pick my way out of here the grass is not this loud secret ladder secret ladder secret ladder in that fireplace secret ladder in the fireplace the fireplace had a secret ladder secret ladder are you serious go back and extinguish the fireplace the secret ladder in there the guy right here oh my goodness how did you wait for me you knew i was coming somehow wow that was terrifying geez all right well be i gotta be careful i'm gonna wait till they leave the tapper room worry i'll find you he's right here take your head out here i'm gonna bludgeon you in the face the roof is really loud moss i'll find you damn you come out and fight me i'm over the ledge i have an idea close your eyes one two three i don't think you can hide for long don't worry i didn't want to [ __ ] do that again how am i gonna do this i gotta get into the darkness here no come back out here i think i have to just wait till they get bored use the bomb arrow come on now come on i accidentally let go i slipped off together there's no error that i figured out why i miss there's no drop on these arrows they go in a straight line there's no drop [Music] all right one on one let's go buddy i don't think this guy knows how to swing a sword that guy does never try and hit a swing sword everybody have anything on them that was just a prop for that guy they don't have anything on them all right how could i have missed that we're good to go i have no more fire arrows though oh dude you guys weren't kidding around this is a secret entrance here but now that's a that's important now that this is important stuff here now oh hell yeah somebody else's bedroom or something what's this can i climb through here can't get through this i can't go through it i'm trying to stuff in i can't i can't i can't how much money do i have now 675 no total of 380 i got 1100 i got it i have enough now [Music] reagan is mentioned take what he values most the purse from his belt so i gotta find his where's his room i have enough where's his room jump all right nice got enough money now i gotta find his personal belt is this his room second floor basement ramirez mansion i feel like i'm just his room is still somewhere he's in the basement do i have to go to the basement i'm on the first floor now keep going did you say there was a creature down here i don't watch out for that creature that you kept down there or something right i don't see a creature still in the bay this is a pretty i got a key though oh yeah there's an alarm [Music] oh [ __ ] is that him that's him that's him that's him that's him that's him i think that's him that's him is that him what was that should have known nothing could get in here the king center's regards it maybe [Music] no i wanted to get [Music] yeah there's like a bunch of [ __ ] in here i i want to get the the money first i'll just end the mission wrong one no really how do i get in here does he have a key i can't open these there we go hell yeah what's in here the other one works for this dude doesn't it thank you very much what do you got open it up open it nice all right i want to get all the items all right here we go hell yeah got it good maybe [Music] add coke button yeah all right cutscene coming up that was a cool mission i like that one stealing fur and fang of beasts for survival then came the builder who brought us the hammer and with it we forged a new way of life to reject the hammer is to denounce the builder the book of hammers i was going to pay lord randall and his vase collection a visit but the downwind thieves guild beat me to the score word is that they haven't divvied the booty yet apparently their leaders donald and reuben are arguing over the prized sapphire base sounds like they could use it what do you mean the creature is like there's a creature down there or something that i can like what do you want to do they'll be so busy blaming each other no one will suspect an outsider the down winders you can milk the creature it's a meme okay well i don't nearby i don't really care the guild's hideout is beneath the casino i have a map of the complex i got from sources from the inside once i'm in the overlord's fancy i'll have to search for the secret entrance to the hideout i have to be careful the downwinders know me all too well if they catch sight of me they'll nobody said you should really skip this mission they don't just kill me for trespassing does this one suck finding the vase may prove difficult since i have no idea where it is should be a hot topic of conversation among the downs this is the worst mission in the game skip this one i cannot i don't think i can skip missions one has an incredibly confusing layout uh i mean is it possible that i could bunnyhop all the way to the end and pick up the item i skipped this one in my playthrough too really what's why is it so bad our break into the downwind thieves guild by breaking into the gambling den the overlords fancy retrieve the sapphire vase guild made stealing the vase more difficult make them pay don't leave with less than a thousand in loot get out of the guild and back all right so just take a thousand bucks get the vase and get out is he enough [Music] i yeah i'm taking like at least two of these yeah maybe not that many see you in four hours is it i can't even i don't think i can skip i'll figure it out whatever i like the water arrows though they're very useful all right that sounds good to me let's go okay so yeah that is a i feel like i have to go like this and lean in real close and get to about here and then the girl from the exorcist is gonna scream in my face what is this map [Music] okay howdy what did i do wrong this guy's gonna step on it i'm gonna make you bleed somebody step on it [Music] so they don't like that i'm what are they don't all right let me just okay they don't like me at all they don't want to see me at all open the door okay so nobody can see me which is weird because how am i supposed to walk by this um what are you talking about what am i doing i'm like passing out what's happening it's me security is necessary to prevent exposure and delusion of talent do you want to argue with the lords now what's the password hand of shadow foot of air i think i have to sit here open the door okay well now he hasn't given me the password are you tapping me he tapping he is necessary and i'm standing here listening to danno tell you the password do you think he's gonna let me if i'm not in the guild or you think i'm liquid enough not to remember it shutter i'll put up with your air i got you now tapper shutter i'll put it over here that guy still had to get his point across excuse me he didn't see me at all you left the door wide open knock knock anybody help yeah i see you're right wait time what do i do now let him talk i'm just every orc in every movie let them do their little cut scene and i'll move on password reeves balls sutter it's me security is necessary to prevent exposure and dilution of talent do you want to argue with the lords now what's the password hand of shadow foot of air open the door okay well now he hasn't given me the password are you taffing me security is necessary to pro and i'm standing here listening to danno tell you the password do you think he's going to let me if i'm not in the guild or you think i'm liquid enough not to remember it sutter i'll put up with your heirs a ways but if you start putting it like i'm that much of a fool there will be blood now open this door pop the door [ __ ] oh [ __ ] there's a lady right there did you see something how about you [Music] i just i just might i just have it's a gta i have to just throw stuff with people all right relax all right just close my eyes and just wait open the door okay well now he hasn't given me the password are you tapping me security is necessary to pro and i'm standing here listening to danno tell you the password you think he's gonna let me if i'm not in the guild or you think i'm liquid enough not to remember it reminds me of a local like car commercial start putting it like i'm that much of a fool this is larry and steves larry and steve's auto empire come on down and visit me and steve we'll take good care of you are we good where did he come from all right i'm going this way i'm not just going to go in the front door like i got away with it i did okay let's go so i gotta get into the casino because you stole that from there's a justin roiland joke relax okay so is this the casino save it it's so bright out here too turn around i.e okay well this is great this guy slowly walks up this hallway that's really fantastic you don't come all the way over here right what the okay i'm hidden right here i can probably just uh smoke him right this is dark any keys on you all right let's take this guy money helping doesn't work when you have a person kind of does yeah it does all right get into the casino save it right here what is this place it's merlin's workshop i don't know what this is it's locked none of these open deliveries to the back door only oh i'm delivery i got a delivery for you okay delivery got it deliveries to the back door wait patience don't come all the way over here right hope not huh something there all right i'm in oh [ __ ] don't worry i'll find you where's his feet oh he's coming back hmm must have been rats hey what was i didn't know that that opened up to right there oh give me a break you didn't hear anything how would you hear that right i swear i gotta kill this guy right now i gotta wrap around and kill this guy i know you're around here somewhere i didn't mean to quick save [Music] your dog meat come on now come on as soon as i find you this way okay run saved ron has been officially saved we're okay i could be more careful get the door out of the way before i have a meltdown all right relax slow down huh garrett we have an intruder keep your mouth shut keep the mouth shut keep melting keep your mouth shut keep your mouth shut i'm gonna let you live keep the mouth shut keep your mouth shut you're gonna keep your mouth shut [Music] gave him a chance i gave him an opportunity it looks like wolfenstein like this of the ground what's down here [Music] i'll do that later you have a key on him or anything line it up he wasn't doing anything if he had gotten up i'm in a lot of trouble that's one less person to walk around and find me you have bloodlust i don't have i don't have bloodlust i'm just trying to think things realistically i'm just playing a video game if that guy gets up i'm i'm in trouble and you know for a fact i'm gonna throw a box at somebody and he's gonna go he's gonna go from this lying like this to what was that and run straight out the door like i'm not going to give that not going to have that chance i'm going to go in here i don't wanna get hurt though can i like crouch and i have to take that damage that sucks um what why am i this is like uh what's a game not boardwalk empire the game with the music and it's hard and you run around through the hallways and it's top down hotline miami secret door all right where am i they're so busy gambling their money away they won't notice if i take a bit oh he got a big key on him there's nobody even down here just take everything [ __ ] there are people here now the plane can i play blackjack of course you'd want to hit on 20. 28. you lose boy what are the odds of that save me there's someone here i guess i can go wait there might be more stuff over here there is of course yes yes yes all right there's more tables over here now over here i don't spin the roulette table [Music] i didn't know i did not know that was gonna happen i gotta go this way no actually let me go over here first may the trickster find you in the dark didn't quite catch that i said hit me someone there sorry nothing here now here we go i'm not there's nobody to milk you relax you're not one of us piece of [ __ ] i swear to god where this guy's walking around alright take out the torches thanks for the reminder video game much better you don't even see anything shut up um okay all right nice nice nice nice [ __ ] there's so much stuff in here what am i supposed to do about this look at all the stuff that's back here have light over here i know but there's so much cool stuff i guess i could can i go around the other side moss arrows that's a good idea that's a really that's actually really an idea oh [Music] what do i do i'm getting too jumpy got him [Music] uh whatever i'm just gonna leave what's with this light i thought i saw something dude guess it was nothing sorry i made a fuss did i just see what i think i saw [Music] stay right there garrett oh [ __ ] you're gonna learn what pain is all about i'm a genius i think oh he's got a gold key all right let me in oh my god i figured i got it i got it i got i got i got it i got it i'm stuck on the guy's body i'm stuck on his body get off his body please with him again okay oh [ __ ] oh [ __ ] oh [ __ ] oh [ __ ] oh [ __ ] don't hurt me oh [ __ ] oh [ __ ] don't hurt me oh [ __ ] anyway i can't get away anyway don't wake up with explosions i can't go over there we have an intruder walk on that no no no no no no don't turn the alarm on got him all right he's gonna step on the land mine i'm good he's dead you stepped on a land mine my friend you stepped on a land mine and you're fine [Music] thank god you have a potion on you can i like get rid of their bodies i don't i don't think this works i'm gonna drink that potion what what's going on what's going on guards it's garrett get him oh my god you have money what's happening wait are they not i thought they were dead ah they're only knocked out i thought you said i was killing people i'm bro i didn't know i was doing this i thought i was just getting rid of the bodies okay oh he sees me he sees me the other guy's just blocking him secrets can't break that water arrow please hurry i'm not going to do it i promised i wouldn't do it ever again it didn't have yeah okay i got it right i got it nothing in there all right secret in the fireplace what's up use the back door 47 if you must visit i don't give a damn what it does to your clothes i will not risk reuben scum following you in until i get my key back and the vase is sitting on my mantelpiece you're just going to have to tolerate the inconvenience diana i need the sapphire vase i need a thousand bucks sapphire vase where would i be what an awful map i might as well just guess i have absolutely no idea where this would be so overlords fancy [Music] i wonder in the fire hold on did i go over here did not okay doesn't know where i am don't let that guy ring the bell why do you have to just run all over the place [Applause] okay i'm fine oh there's a dead guy over here look i'd be a dead lady too look let me give it to you straight the guy that you work for is a real bad guy he's a mean person he's he's corrupt he has all kinds of awful [ __ ] going on i'm just telling you right now this is i'm giving you an opportunity for you to go for you get out and leave i'm going to take a bunch of [ __ ] from this guy because he's a bad guy someone's searching for something and we'll get the tap for it exactly i'm talking about exactly so you and i are on the same page so i mean if you feel like it you just kind of forget that i was here and we can just go on with our with our days yeah there's a dead guy right here but don't worry i'm not gonna shoot another error at you i know this is gonna be really gruesome but this is just how it is welcome to the business i don't know if you knew this person or not but like they were potentially bad they were trying to shoot me with arrows i thought we had an understanding i thought we had an understanding i was i thought we had an understanding how do i get down here over here he has a sword oh he's right here yes hi how are you there ain't nobody left there all the guards are dead i just you know what i'm just trying to help here there's nobody left i killed all the guards yes i have a sword yes i have a bow and arrow i'm not gonna hurt you i'm just i'm not going to please leave go go into like a minecraft gold dungeon oh holy [ __ ] oh my god you led me to the sacred room uh davey till dono and ruben quit their bitchin best we just stick to our own turf i'm too much donald's man to risk it all right he has a sword this lady i swear to god okay i've not gone down here yet let's save it i wonder if there's something down here first this doesn't open where am i going it's the creature this creature it's a spider relax loud i can't break those though am i going the right way dude okay i have no idea i hope this is the right way i slows down the intruders though i couldn't do i couldn't do anything about that well this vase situation might give you all the action you need i heard vase action i heard vase holy [ __ ] you're awful ah oh okay you got me that one that one was in the head that one was in the face i you could yeah that was actually not bad that was not bad but now he pissed me off climb the ladder all right vase is down here somewhere oh my god hey what was that drop that weapon don't move oh yeah you have a sword i don't like it stop running stop running open this door open this door right now open this door right now [ __ ] cover me i'm stuck i'm actually kind of glad i got stuck everybody have a keys on them no i need help cucumber save it here now what is going on with this this is blocked 47 47 what is it said something about 47 what was it i have to get in here i can't get in here though is there a drill that way i think i gotta go this way right in here help i gave her like 100 opportunities to leave she's just yelling and she's gonna get attention called to here all right now i need what do i need to do i need the sapphire vase 47s over here do i do with this though i can go over i don't know there's a tunnel in the like water here oh look at you i open that i can't open that a hundred opportunities i did i really did 47 there it is all right 47. 47.48 what is this for i just do them both there's something they're doors hold on all right whatever open 48 literally riding in the wall good puzzle i mean yeah but so what milk so i opened the door that's labeled 47 i remember even a door labeled 47. get me out of the water what's this okay so i opened that does that do anything up here or something i don't know yeah 47 48. something back here i have no idea 49 well [ __ ] i don't know where to go remember this level was really there's a window on the other end two doors in tunnel from before window like back here uh here over here actually unironically skip this this level sucks ah a back door i think i just found it sutter's job last night heard he came in pretty late you get something good don't he wish he's up in this lady's bedroom all quiet like when he hears that outside nothing's so tame you can scarf out the way he came quick enough but he don't want to go till he's got something so he sweeps everything on the dresser jewelry candlesticks whatnot into his sack gets halfway down the stairs when the sack starts leaping about owen wilson he's cut the lady's cat too cat claws a hole in the sack everything falls out except the cat and that's halfway up his arm with claws every which way had to jump in the river to get the damn thing off left a trail of blood and water over half the city just going home it's garrett get him oh actually i bugged the cutscene perfect into the dark into the dark down down down okay the sky was stealing something from the i just see what i think i saw hey get out of here did i just see what i think i saw i gotta get this other guy too he walks all the way over here watch what i think no you didn't see anything this is a good hiding spot i'm gonna use this as a hiding spot yeah that's a good spot and go even deeper or let me let me use this area first probably something here oh is that money behind the bed it is very nice explosive barrel oh come on i thought this was bags of like scrooge mcduck money whatever there he is got him thank god all right what's in here nothing by the bricks sideways i don't know anybody in here treasure in here though oh hell yeah i'm i definitely have to be at the threshold now right i don't have a thousand bucks yet how that seems impossible i get this one too i can't unsee the vertical bricks now it's weird oh nice don't throw a piece of dynamite in here please nothing a terrible room give me a break what's that oh well too many imaginings this sounds real quick is someone over there glad it was nothing i don't like don't think you can hide for long how have you not triggered this how have you not triggered this uh oh excuse me over there oh well sorry guess it was nothing don't say anything what's that [ __ ] someone's coming i'm hidden no skip this level i'm probably i'm almost at the end of the level probably we're probably right at the end for the last time tell the maid to stay out of the banner room and don't touch anything in it it is the room where i can have peace of mind my collection is too precious to risk any colombian okay any cleanliness so hit the banner it's uh that's all of it go to the banner room oh i'm gonna come you're not even halfway you know what what how am i not halfway you're halfway through or less this mission is the worst how do i skip it i don't think i can skip this press ctrl alt shift and put your entire fist in your mouth okay i'm right look i'm in the guys quarters i thought i saw something what's going on how are you nice to see you somebody hear that i know you're around here somewhere right there oh no it's all right linus item see you later there's the next guy all right i'm up here now private quarters let's go all right what's this dude's name i don't know huh i've got you [Music] hmm hey get stop splashing around oh you idiot you won't stay hidden for long taffer what do you say where are you okay all right don't touch my things don't touch my things right don't touch my things got it don't start thinking i'm gonna forget about you [ __ ] [ __ ] where's the key stay alert someone is up to something come on out and i promise i'll take care of you quickly remember did you plug in the smelloscope this game you needed to clear some levels i'm gonna make you bleed you can't be serious not when i'm this far into the game what was that what makes doors that open like this why open the whole [ __ ] way here how do i open this that's the safe right there i need a key to get in there or something is it in his room with a key with a lockpick key in the other house i mean other house note this is possibly the most complicated map in the game from conversations or scrolls you can easily miss hold on this is important you can easily miss you will gain the following knowledge donald has lord randall's vase locked in his private safe in the west reuben has a stolen reuben has stolen the key to donald's safe he's also entrusted his house key to his right-hand man tom you must first find tom get the key to ruben's house steal donald's safe key from ruben's quarters then retrieve the vase from donald safe bro i'm in the wrong house is there a console command to skip the game like what's what's the console come in just play the game all right all right well i know where this guy's house is with the other house on the other side of the game this is sunk cost fallacy are you having fun i mean yeah kind of okay ctrl alt shift end that's not how that you made that up control alt shift end is as you made that up as a funny joke control shift alt end i feel like it's gonna all it's gonna control shift alt end i feel like i could have accidentally oppressed all those at some point in the game okay i'm sorry i skipped it everyone told me to skip it look this is an old game sometimes all games have like hard weird levels [Laughter] a lot of people in chat were saying this next level is like the best level in game i was contacted by a woman named victoria she claims to remember in the game by the way i took care of ramirez and now wants me to steal something for him the target is a magical sword owned by an aluminum collector named constantine little is known about constantine except that he is an eccentric new face in the city and mostly keeps to himself this next level is a skipper victoria says the sword will probably be on display we'll see we'll be well protected i know have that power security systems she also mentioned that the guards are tough and organized and the mansion is confusing to navigate in they tell me it's confusing already constructed recently so i've had to piece together my own map from observation and hearsay sounds like the place is a bit of a maze i guess if you're rich enough you can build any sort of med it's a maze this is going to be a challenging job but it'll pay better than the last few i've taken skip well i know i can at least complete the game by skipping as usual the front entrance is heavily guarded but i've managed to find another way in this game is fun though this is cool because once i've picked up the sword i'll still have to worry about getting back out you guys have to remember this game was made in like 1989 or something it's a long time ago okay find and obtain the sword it's probably on an upper level of the mansion take the opportunity to steal other valuables leave the mansion with the sword [Music] a lot of stuff i want more of these [Music] what the f what how much of these cost okay uh another mine no the bombs they just don't do this caused a lot of problems the mines suck they're loud they don't go off right away they're terrible and flashes flash me too they're awful you know i'm just gonna get more fire arrows just get another one these at least kill people but i probably should get a heel okay yeah another pose i need a potion right let's go i'm back all right get into the mansion steal the sword you got it and it's a guarded entrance right probably not come on now come on okay you taffa i'll find you this is perfect come back here perfect you can't see [ __ ] come back here don't come this close thank you very much i'll take that thank you wait till he turns around i say where'd you come from and i'd like to know what happened there run you're scared not very good swordsman are you come back here nice key got there love how like when something happens i i like look to you i like look over to you right i like look to you almost like i can't believe it so you must not be able to believe it either i'm looking at you like you're a person like can you believe what just happened i'm over here for reassurance that like i'll turn and i'll see like a bunch of oh my god dude that was [ __ ] up stop right there come get me try sneaking that's a good trick i got the key off of you all right i'm just going on the front door man whoa what was that oops oh shut up i've already used so much health already it's bad news all right i'm i'm in i got on the front door though now we slow down be careful with everything i steal a bunch of stuff all right nice somebody coming oh you gotta be kidding me right when i open the door he's there you sidestep me i got sidestepped over here he just left me to the treasure chest what a dope okay this is the main entrance here we're gonna rap this way so the sword is up in the top floor the same room that's a big vase upstairs i'm not done yet i'm i think there's more stuff here there is it's all just bottles that's it oh this is pretty that's really pretty who's there oh who's hearing me i see you there come out drop that weapon don't move get out of my way i'm stuck on this chandelier still all right i'm just going the way that i was supposed to go and it's this way take out the club let's go what a weird i feel like i'm on the set of a nickelodeon sitcom like what is this this is kind of creepy oh info right here what do you say that's weird that's weird that's a weird door to have in your house that's very strange what oh my god i thought it was i thought it was speaking to me this is weird there's definitely a hidden thing in here no doubt they have things that shoot out of the mouth don't move this is uh this is tripped yeah this is trapped knew it i'm good oh hell yeah definitely where is it and like gold nugget up here i did pretty good i think that's it that's gold rock dr seuss house i don't like this place i heard a shot i was in a really good place i gotta stop yelling too i'm just like yelling for no reason i'm just making loud sounds like i heard a shot like you could just say that you heard a shot you don't have to yell it into the microphone they're all here they're watching they can see you said you were going to be a normal person and not be a weirdo anymore i mean i think that went out the window i was i tried that was my new year's resolution but all new year's resolutions don't work i did it for like a day is this a meltdown stream i don't i don't think so no way i mean i've been a little a little uh a little active but i've been i've been active i wouldn't say this is meltdown it's not even close i'm just kind of having fun with the video game already went down there it's gonna shoot again isn't it oh that was [ __ ] up this wall let's share this that scared the [ __ ] up what do you think how do you think i feel and it happened to me what do you think how do you think i feel i it i'm it happened to me i'm the one that got hit by the car you watched me get hit by the car i had to get hit by the car your scream was scarier than the thing okay don't i gotta be careful all right don't get trolled by the stupid joke room all right go ahead three two one shoot it oh what the hell am i doing is it turn oh all right this is charlie in the chocolate factory fun house wait will he get hit by this this will shoot him right someone will whoa what's down here okay um oh [ __ ] come on now come on oh [ __ ] out your dog meat okay that was just that was do or die right there i had to do that it was over are you all right no no of course you're not all right sorry on out then yeah where is this guy down here oh [ __ ] oh that hurts right in the head [Music] all right we're good i want to go that weird door on the ground wait what am i doing is there a second floor third floor what am i what am i doing here i go in there you can cheese guards what's that hey some come on over here help shoot him oh you just sounded like finn from adventure time what the [ __ ] is this place [ __ ] this level this level sucks this is it's just like a trap fun like what is this all right i guess i'll walk over here and get eaten alive by the monsters get off of me this place is huge i'm gonna go up [Music] there's the bug room hey let's open this one with a pic a pic lock where we at cash very nice all right am i i'm on the top floor no what's up where's the there's another floor where this looks like the top floor one what happened to those people okay nice i gotta find a staircase up secret in the fireplace i look i think there might be look at that right above looks like a button just where the fire place [ __ ] goes okay whatever um hello oh hell yeah okay all right i gotta find the staircase this is the main entrance this goes down i believe yeah so i gotta go up and in here i've been pretty much everywhere i've been everywhere okay i can go up from here oh you unlucky bastard i don't know how you turned around give me that key right now give me the key got it i gotta put it behind the put at least put them behind stealth game by the way i know it's i am stealthing i'm i'm in a fun house right now it's hard to stealth me you don't know what room you're coming out from or going into uh i'm okay oh more stuff it's the big dining room yep remember this is violent you fell off uh how long how long do you think i could have like an underbite for before somebody like that's new to the channel real like is like what what's this what are you doing i gotta go over this way what the [ __ ] i need more potions i think that hurts to do that he had a key too all right i didn't i haven't been out here marlon brando oh weird stuff over there that's pretty cool garden that's not a bad garden let's go magical tree stump wait this is this is underneath the where what is this this is really weird i climb up here there's a door up here wait rope arrow what's the point of this being in the game it only works on wood uh i wha would i apparently it only works on wood we're going to like jurassic park now okay time to go visit the keebler elves this is so strange what is this all doing here yeah this is crazy oh there's your wood yeah can i go up you can't i can't even shoot up i can't go up there's nothing to even do this for what is going on was not adjusted to somebody's mansion walls or trees wait i can go down here i was already here okay uh i swim i wonder if this takes me somewhere please take the next left you see i'm not joking this is left i took the left arden um wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait a minute stop it once and put your hands up i haven't saved it in a long time you won't come in the water [Music] we're safe as soon as i find what's he doing get in the water get back in the water okay did i make it through this garden is this a new area that i haven't no i've been here before guys i have no idea what's going on right now back on the second floor let's open this one you gotta follow the music thanks for staying up late by the way i and we're about 9 30 pacific which means we're past midnight eastern so thanks for staying up this looks important nothing in here though it's gonna be a trap room crouch e and i already read this one astor the one who trespassed your greenhouse is chastised he did not know the rules but spies there no longer one who trespassed your greenhouse that i just was i think i was just there i didn't go this way really really cannot open this really really nice try good try i will commend you for the effort all right third floor right no still the second floor so eb and j are grilled cheese uh i would say grilled cheese i gotta be in the mood for a pb j but a grilled cheese i could eat at any moment of any day of any time it could be two o'clock in the morning it could be eight o'clock in the morning i could have just woken up i could have just you know gone to sleep i think i'm where i'm supposed to be no don't pull this [ __ ] on me right now i'm already kind of getting tired and i this is this is one of those everything's upside down things uh um i'm going up going up you eat grilled cheese in your sleep i mean i don't i'm just i'm just saying it's good whenever you can enjoy your grilled cheese at any moment of the day and i'm looking for the sword how do you guys even now i feel bad for you guys i really do honest to god like how do you navigate all this you must have a headache all day oh my god of noise i don't i'm not do i'm done i'm i think i'm done this is really the game's really fun i'm done what's your favorite type of cheese ah i like swiss cheddar provolone um super mario tubes uh what else do i like i like um i see you there just give me the sacred baseball bat whatever the [ __ ] it is get out of my way get out of my way give me the sacred sword whatever it is where is it parmigiana's yeah i love shae parmesan is fantastic did you hear that nobody was like giggling there was like a giggling like gnome person [Music] don't worry i'll find you don't make me come find you don't think you can hide for long you've got a bow too you are in my way oh my god sacred sword time to take my new sword and get out of this crazy place here we are i'll keep you out give me i'll give [Music] [ __ ] [Music] step on it the mind's the worst there's more society in the whole game worthless what's it worth i can't even say worthless wagon that's a worthless item [Applause] [Music] do i hear somebody it's like somebody's screaming you hear this step on this somebody's going like get out get out oh my god get me out of here somebody's laughing i you heard it uh what that was like that was like [ __ ] this is mario [ __ ] this is tomorrow this is like mario 64. this is [Music] i leave i can't open this from this side of course i can get out of my way oh this way this way was that me out oh shut up the music is getting scarier and scarier i'm trapped in this goddamn house i'm trapped in this house i'm stuck here this way then i could go right yep and then here's that this is the entrance i gotta so the lady was laughing and making all kinds of weird sounds that was terrifying that's fun level though that was a good one it gets worse garrett it's victoria i trust you made it back alive you've done well garrett come with me and bring the sword it's much worse it's time for the payment you've been promised yes oh god a reference this is spongebob do you have any questions for me position of a superior brandy that has the most respective effect i prefer my payment in cash pbj or grilled cheese spongebob which one my apologies i've been watching you mr garrett so closely in fact that i'm afraid i'd forgotten we haven't actually met yet i am constantine animated you were gonna pay me you brought me here to kill me but you have it all wrong mr garrett would it surprise you to know that it was i who hired you to steal my own sword yes you see victoria and i are old associates yes you were being tested do you understand and i must say you more than live up to your reputation wait you are quite an extraordinary thief testing me what is it you want from me if satan hooves i am a collective but there are some items that are not available for purchase they must be acquired using other means in this case the item in question would be best acquired by thieving not simple thieving no i need an artist like yourself what exactly is this item it is the gemstone he's got like goat hooves for its unusual appearance yes kept hidden in the sealed cathedral deep inside the halls of the scum you are possibly friendly with the order of the hammer no fanatics make unreliable friends excellent i am prepared to offer you quite a sum a hundred thousand upon receipt of the eye i don't see how i can refuse such an offer marvelous victoria can fill you in on all the particulars this is the final mission mr garrett the sword keep it you have earned it but also i believe you'll find it useful in your quest no okay there's a few more this is mission number six right from the time of peril did the grounded gape and did the dead rest unquiet against us our bands of iron and hammers of stone prevailed not some did doubt the builder's plan but the seals held strong and the few did triumph and the doubters were in chat thinking he wouldn't beat the last level but he did laying into the minions the eyes ride at universal studios the abandoned cathedral of the hammerheids pretty lit cathedral is located i don't know i'm done i'll see you guys tomorrow not tomorrow what what day what's today some kind of catastrophe what's i've heard stories of the incident most are wild rumors about hordes of zombies and raging fires saturday okay now that part of the city is walled off no one's allowed to go in not that many people all right i've got a question for people in chat here maps of the area are easy to find in attics and old trunks but like all of them the one i've got is over 50 years old i plan on streaming again on wednesday i'll make my way through the ruins to the hammerhead cathedral i was going to do vr way inside want to sue inside the cathedral i think i want to do one more game stream with the eye i want to do everhood something tells me i also kind of want to finish this easy but for the amount i'm getting paid i'm willing to take some serious risks how much more time is in this game another couple hours maybe two three hours this is fun it's a little old it's a little crunchy but i'm having a good time so what i'll probably do is on wednesday it's probably two to there's like eight missions thief two is better oh there's a lot more okay this might take more than another stream all right well i'm i'm down to play it again uh i know you just you got sucked into a wormhole oh yeah i'll play yakuza again i'll play sam and max again season three oh yeah i'll play no umbrellas a lot oh yeah i'll finish i'll finish hollow knight oh i'll i know i'll do monster ranch i know trust me i know trust me or hollow knight oh no i i actually will probably i'll put this again wednesday i want to do everhood but at this time i also kind of want to maybe do this too and or i'll just do this maybe i'll won't do vr yet maybe i'll finish this or play some more if not then this is really fun it's cool to play for a while wednesday everhood's the plan but you know we'll see what about olives part two no all this part one was enough let me save it though yeah let me just let me get prepared this is a seems like a big mission constant oh i actually get the new sword too uh i'll take one of these [Music] take two of these and i'll take a few i'll take a few of these [Music] i think that's all i can afford [Music] it is okay very interesting save the game hard save right here in the beginning right at the top uh i think i'm gonna call it here that was really fun if we see this again then we see it again if not then that was thief gold i would give that a stamp of thumbs up i had a good time hope you did too are you gonna put the ring light around your neck i if it's safe i would do it but i don't know i'll see you guys on wednesday around four o'clock pacific and i know that we're starting late a lot recently uh my sleep schedule is kind of all over the place so once i correct it and i can pull back my sleep schedule a little bit uh we'll try to start more around that like 2 2 30 area pacific [Music] yeah that was thief i will see you guys on wednesday [Music] as always thanks for watching go to the credits yeah another reason why i want to start earlier is because i know that four o'clock pacific if i stream for more than five or six hours it starts to get really late for people and i don't want to keep everybody up crazy late you know ten o'clock pacific is twelve one a.m eastern which is just an ungodly hour eu i'd like to try to stay in that at least most of north america doesn't have to stay up too late now sorry eu friendos i live in the pacific time zone and i stream in the afternoon i'm very sorry it's the way it is though we have a 15-hour difference that's just that's ridiculous to me yeah well at least be doing everhood keep an eye out if we do something else and then i'm probably gonna get back into vr hitman vr comes out on the 20th the second that releases we're gonna play it we're gonna play it on the 20th hopefully it works hopefully there's not server problems or something the olives i already did the olives in the beginning of the stream i mean i attempted it can't say it went very that well but i did i tried what is the big stream the big stream will probably be i don't have a hard day for you but it's supposed to be somewhere in the end of january into maybe the first or second week of february i don't have a date yet but i will give it to you there's a lot of factors as to what that date is no i missed the olives all right let's raid uh uh we got we uh connor eats pants is live connor has raided the stream a bunch of times really swell dude been a huge supporter of the channel as you know uh and i'm ending and conor's live so let's uh let's go say hi to connor say hello um there we go playing pokemon brilliant uh diamond or whatever this is if i die in the game i die in real life okay um say hi to connor everybody say hello to connor connor now go say hi i will see you guys on wednesday good night goodbye take care of yourself sleep well have a good one good night [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] he's he's literally at the very end of pokemon brilliant diamond he's literally at the last cut scene of the game just be aware of that by the way guys be aware that he's literally like a last cut scene i think i have no idea he just that's what he just said all right be careful i'll see you later

Channel: Mike322

Views: 15,250

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Id: nvXX5HT9U6U

Length: 347min 12sec (20832 seconds)

Published: Sun Jan 09 2022