Jail An't So Bad | #isawthisontheinternet

what up y'all welcome to I saw this on the internet today's guest to my immediate left we have Rome from the illustrious YouTube group dormtainment from Atlanta by way of Miami uh Rome say what's up man hey what's up everybody how y'all feeling how you doing we have computer engineer actress comedian from Detroit Keisha e and we have at I'm sorry Cobb County thank you my boy who is Brandon Lewis today it was your first time watching this show we talk about random old stories that are on the internet nothing trending nothing new all bizarre today's first story and they don't know any of these stories I'm just going to tell them as they as this happens did you guys know because I saw this on the internet Aretha Franklin was tracked by the FBI for 40 years because she was she was you know from 1967 to 2007 the Federal Bureau of Investigation methodically collected information about Aretha [ __ ] they use false phone calls surveillance infiltration and highly placed sources her her files started because she was connected to Martin Luther the King and you know what they did with old Martin yeah yeah and um basically they they they they they wrote this letter for example 1974 said deartha I'm still in charge of you I'm not to be crossed you should be paying me some of my money evidently your advisor do not know the dangers of neglecting what I'm saying I would hate to drag your father into this and then four months later her father was shot oh dang the FBI declined several comments that already when you decline comments you did it yeah yeah I declined copy your brother either you did it yeah they were shocking her but I definitely knew that she uh really was about the action what was she yeah okay okay okay it's funny because in the studio she wasn't you know most knows artists they bring their life to the studio she's like nah I'm gonna keep that on this side oh yeah meanwhile she said I'll be fresh as hell at the Feds Watching another three outfit changes at her funeral don't play with her yes wait is that true yes yeah actually changes three yeah 50p Cadillacs she had three outfit Shane she shut the city down now I'm not gonna lie from here there's no way I'm not telling my people make sure you give me in three to four outfits before my funeral because that's fire you don't say you could pick it out you you or your dead man they come in they lay it out says okay so is this so is this how uh respect came I mean yeah [Music] out of jail Keisha [Music] I've picked somebody up from jail okay no but you was giving her the question but we didn't did you put some money forward okay okay he's a personal trainer if he'd be training people on the outside world it's a [ __ ] in jail that's a personal trainer to the outside so this is the outside world yeah that's fire so if y'all need a personal trainer out there look them up confidence yeah this is what I'm this is he getting real money he getting real money jail really ain't that bad I don't think [Laughter] he was popping bottles I said [ __ ] what are you celebrating first of all how did you get the Moet exactly what are you doing what are you celebrating yeah so he had his he sent it on Jpay to his brother and because I guess he don't got Instagram and he had the brother screenshot and send it to me because he saw my special or the show on Revolt TV funny yeah right yeah so I said y'all [ __ ] got premium channels in jail that's number one so he I did a joke on there about that so he's like you know I could just tell like he was done let me just say a bit about me like I get out and fight and I think he said he got like five more years what he said like it was a short time answer my call this next month so I just wanted I was like oh I've never done that joke again I get out in five years five more years I got a 10 year old daughter I says that's who your focus need to be remember that's one of my worst fears is prison like I watch prison shows and they do there was one show where the guy said as soon as you get in there they line up and you gotta fight I'm talking about as soon as you like soon as you cross your your feet into the lineup and you gotta fight and if you don't fight you know what it is for the rest of the time you in there anybody yeah it's an old injury and nobody's gonna care and here's they're not gonna care you got to get out gotta get down and being locked up abroad is even worse because one I don't speak the language two they don't care about Americans over there Jones are probably better no no what no no no no no America is and you get some cocoa I feel like recently I was reading an article watching the documentary on Switzerland jails and they look like they are in a dorm like this they're all about Rehabilitation and learning and stuff but America ain't designed to rehabilitate you the issue the prison system here is for-profit so they they want you to just stay in here yeah and make stuff for cheap and they also even if you don't make nothing uh I think that documentary the 13th uh Amendment yeah Ava was talking the able board she producer they're talking about how much money they're made just by you being there yeah yeah cars and food and yeah you know like and then you're going to make stuff so that in Switzerland they like bro we want you to go back to the world America and then America when you get out they they don't they don't want you to work you can't get a job right so it's like people don't even they'd be like bro I want to be regular they'd be like nah bro you'll never be ready food is very healthy in like L.A prisons details she don't got just like random information [ __ ] FaceTime are you just in your room like ain't nobody came to check on you and then like 10 15 minutes like all right I gotta go Gotta take these Christmas pictures as the unit they take it they said my ex got married in jail you know how first of all oh yeah you can do that you can do that you could do that yeah it's so cold were you hurt when that came out or are you proud when I tell you the first time okay I watched that video because I had recently moved to LA when that video came out right so you're still trying to like find your way and figure it out right I watched that video every single day every morning before I even talk to a guy yes that's motivation it was motivated it was like if this girl can do it oh she ain't waiting for us because I have this like perfectionist thing where it's like it has to be perfect or I don't want to put anything out until it's like [Music] through and through but I seen like that one part where they be in their jackets [Music] all the words I watched that video like and I was dying laughing and then I was tweet about it and I think like with Ricky Smiley because he really was like um playing at our time and her feelings with her she's on the news because she was like I thought he liked my music and I found out I was the butt of the joke so she was like well let me read you she did a remix because she knows or the remix is auto-tune because the beat was off on the first one how old is she so she came with a mink like I got y'all this time she's downtown she said y'all don't like it I'm the butt of the joke here's a remix what what this you know according to that wig she might be too baby [Music] Big Sean and tee Grizzly and Aretha okay before we finish this segment top five Detroit artists you can't use tea baby we know she's golden yeah so she like that line down line down yeah I say big time for sure is this an order or five to one oh just no no are you just naming it okay cool um Big Sean Aretha mm-hmm um hmm [Music] Rock the Boat means [Music] Street Lords and rock bottoming yeah Dej Loaf is not in my meatloaf because I said digital sound like nice like a nice bread let me get some days loaf yeah yeah let me get that all right next to the video yeah but he might be from um all right next seconds all right meet Azalea the chip who smokes a pack a day North Korean Zoo oh who Stephen wonder which is like okay a chimpanzee smokes a pack okay cigarettes 19 year old female whose name is Dale smokes a smokes about a pack a day they insist however that she don't inhale my question to you guys is this what the monkey going that's that's all I'm thinking about stress a little bit a little bit I said this the other day you need animal therapy because think about gazelles they are on alert every day every day you wake up I'm gonna die can you imagine you have a baby in the hospital with a [ __ ] like you better protect it as soon as it come out so this monkey may just be taking on the stress of his whole everything it's like this animal [ __ ] ain't really here monkeys are like probably the closest animal to human beings that's like oh this [ __ ] gets to go you know baby get off stage and tell jokes and I gotta sit here and just you know what I mean yeah where's the monkey at North Korea North Korea first of all North Korea I mean it's controlled so he's smoking cause [ __ ] I only get to come to the zoo once a year someone I'm stressed because I told my other monkeys I had some [ __ ] going the zoo didn't slow down I got bills I know that monkey got a deep voice question is where is he getting the cigarette from yeah the guards the guards is giving it the guards is giving it to the monkeys to your [ __ ] Andreas he's liked it himself want to take a quick break from the show to tell you about DraftKings look football is back in full swing with another week of epic games and who's got you covered on the action for every single one of them DraftKings sports book and official sports betting partner of the NFL new customers can bet five dollars on football and get 200 instantly in bonus bets nobody's missing out on the action this season all DraftKings customers can take advantage of two new offers every game day this September get in on the NFL week two actual DraftKings Sportsbook download the app now and use the code crazy to sign up new customers can bet just five dollars and take home 200 instantly in bonus bets only on draftking Sportsbook with code crazy the crown is yours and now back to the show hey let's shoot me one more pack [ __ ] now it's you better man yeah I'm in North Korea I'd rather see them rolling up cigarettes not cigarettes cigarettes fit the Asian culture that ain't mean to me yeah no I mean it's a monkey the monkey where are you are you an Asian monkey have you born you know I was that question the other day like do animals and like insects have like because money is what I mean your dog is what money he he's he's Rich he's bushy yeah he blacks because if you like a roach in Africa is it different because they have different type of throat you know what I mean that's a good question yeah yeah and the bugs in Africa they don't run it's like people yeah they don't have remember we was on tour we was in Virginia and Angel and Josh went to a yard house and the roach was in there like Angel saw wrote run through and Angels like hey man first of all this is a water bug yeah relax don't don't do that it's a naked eye the thing got six legs and they're supposed to be the restaurant this is a German hypocrisy it looks it most similar to the American cockroach I think the point is right last year a water bug don't breathe as fast as a roast though so yeah just get it out of here a roach you got to get you take out the packet [Music] foreign braid it up it was bad yeah just to get out of here and before y'all say I see you say the fancy way he pronounced the country when we went to Tanzania they told us to pronounce it that way not Tanzania you know what I'm saying I'm just letting you know patreon that's what they told us so I'ma listen to the people that's right Tanzania yeah Tanzania so this whole time in school think about it the teacher that was teaching us wasn't from Tanzania all the way out damn monkeys out here oh he really is grabbing he's really great you don't want the banana oh inch why was the monkey you have two monkeys on you because the [ __ ] attacked me they was like what can we steal oh she ain't got no no we're gonna take the hair we can resell this in um in Bali listen Keisha is the only person I know personally that I be who I travel a lot you travel a lot you travel a lot Keisha don't never be at home Keisha have you been to uh 23. what so you win the 23 weeks yeah you know we like traveling yeah um I think I probably first started traveling I was like the hell was that 17. that makes okay that makes sense I think like 9 19. what about you zero Mexico [Laughter] I beat this guy don't let the government hear you say that yeah no traveling got to you got to go I bet you're probably about 10. yeah maybe 10 maybe 12. 22 is favorite off the top of your head yake says I was just seeing if you had one it's tough though I know it's tough little baby [ __ ] start throwing questions out 23 at me somewhere between Fiji Fiji Water crazy the real features first of all it's only like a dollar for the big one number one still coffee if you wanted there or it's just called water and I meant actually the color of the water oh yeah yeah South Africa Tokyo oh damn you know we can talk about the podcast I think my favorite probably was Japan probably was the most Japan and Egypt from America's crazy Egypt is like a whole bomb went off when we got to Egypt soon as we landed like oh okay all right yeah in Europe you feel like especially California but in Europe you feel how Young America is you like Otis oh yeah when you get to Egypt you'd be like oh yeah this is pre-civilization like they've been here absolutely way California just feels like it's like 14. it was 115 degrees when we went I said no it was really fun yeah we went during the Christmas I got cut off at a bar and uh in Venice look at you yeah slow down I mean it's the first time I I underestimated wine I underestimated one and I greatly underestimated pork wine so I was I was on that dessert one so the waiter comes by and um and you know it in in uh Italy they don't feed you portions like America like yeah spaghetti don't be you know we be grandmas spaghetti it's possible they give you like they don't even take up the whole plate yeah so we eating but drinking more than we eating because they bring the wine before anything else they're like get this so anyway we drink and drink and drinking and the guys like would you they ask you for a Grappa all the time grandpa is like the final uh Digestive and he's like would you like some Grappa sir and I was like yes absolutely and he goes to get it and the manager's like no more for the America and I was really like I'm cut off yeah come on it was like eight o'clock all right next segment ain't gonna be no Segways add here [Laughter] that's the yeah all right here we go next segment guys hiker lost his phone for 24 hours he ignored Rescuers calls because he didn't recognize the number wait wait he lost his loss a lot no he he was in he was lost oh a hiker in Colorado was lost for 24 hours because he was ignoring Rescuers calls because he didn't recognize the number black people we tend to like no for sure but we would never be in there without cheating yeah you know you're not lost and I'm not gonna answer the call cause I don't know the number he took the booty to the woods he took the Moody to the woods he was like yeah and then you got to make it so then it's 24 hours so your wife is or your girl is like frantic and she's just happy that you home she's not even gonna question the situation he's like I'm taking the bush to the bush I'm taking the bus to the bus I really took the story at face value and Keisha you ain't get on Instagram you ain't you ain't dropped your pen nowhere women are good man women are but who was lost though he was lost and the people calling him when you do that you know right now I was lost hiking why you can't put in in your GPS home but but remember if you get off the track it'd be like proceed to the round because you had a phone but what are you gonna say if he in the woods you're gonna call somebody gonna say something what are your location contact me middle tree uh rock formation can you imagine like he was really lost but is Keisha boyfriend he got to explain it she just not buying it baby listen you know I just take me to where you was at no you didn't no you didn't I don't want to go back there right so we we set up where did you make the wrong turn okay well first off you know I was hanging out with I was hanging out with Kev and he like adventurous I watch a lot of his he just tells stories and each of the stories that ignorant stuff be happening it'd be the woods that's why I don't go they also be of a pale color so there's not me but I'm not going to the woods just to be out there no more especially these these like places where it's just like nothing there's just trees and rocking like nah nah because therapeutic though I'm gonna tell you what with some people on the pad I need a couple people that you know I was out not running uh there was hiking trail near my son old soccer field and I was out there oh yeah I remember that yeah bruh over this Ridge there was a whole coyote big because you there's coyotes in my name right now in my other neighborhood but they're usually small they like small dogs yeah this one yeah okay now we got coyotes my bad I know it's a little coyote I'm just saying we destroyed their habitat Loki gotcha they had this whole part we was like [ __ ] houses but you still ain't got no home but I'm saying the point is I was out there and I seen a coyote and I just thought like he wasn't bigger than me and usually they'd be scared but I thought about the people who be running to like Bears mountains like the ones that will kill you like you know what I'm saying like yeah I don't I think there's old like black people be too stressed in life to add that type yeah we don't need that we don't need we're the monkey smoking the seeds white people looking for the thrill they'd be looking for the we like we got it I wake up I walk outside it's man life is crazy not the monkey I mean not monkeys we are just people smoking cigarettes matter of fact take it out just whoever's editing this go back and say the monkey part take it out we are beautiful people right now all right let's cut back to the wide black people smoking cigarettes Tanzania is that really how they say it yes because it is very much looks like 10. they corrected me immediately so the a is pronounced like a u ton Tanzania so both A's are like long you asking me stuff like I'm listening to what they tell me how do you spell that it's t-a-n it's tan smells like Tanzania oh no if you pronounce the A's different you can get Tanzania yeah what language do you think do you think do you know offhand Swahili all these people okay Swahili yeah they spoke that ass that's all The Lion King pretty much yeah they speak that in South Carolina see y'all [ __ ] I've never been to South Carolina uh probably I ain't been to the weirdest States Wyoming Idaho South Dakota North Dakota Maine yeah I don't know everything else I defeated I don't know the ones I haven't been to is not for it's not that I want to go yeah it's like I haven't been to South to go to North Dakota Wyoming I've been to Wyoming but I drove through it I've been in Miami too many times I've been in Alabama Japan you've been to North Carolina my home and you haven't been to North Carolina you've been in North Carolina shout out to Durham shout out to Bull City shout out to Queen City I just never had a reason to go because that cause your ass all in Tanzania [Laughter] Chicago is not a state ment replace it like here's the thing I love North Carolina I ain't going back there but you know I'm going back okay I go to North Carolina I like North Carolina I like North Carolina I like it for if I need to go like chill yeah we work working comedians be having a reason to go that's true I don't think people if you don't have a show there there's no yeah I don't know if many because you usually travel you vacation yeah I don't know if you're not working there you don't have family there Charlotte is a growing city like so a lot of people are like getting proper like this it's right growing but I'm like asking myself why would Keisha be here yeah and if your family's in the midwest like all your family in Detroit right for the most probably I have family in Texas I have family in St Louis like kind of a little bit all over no family out there I don't have any family in North Carolina I don't mean I don't and I'm not even straight in Charlotte or Raleigh because I love those cities but I can't remember people being like I'm gonna just vacation in Charlotte if they're not going to CIA CIA yeah you're not going to that or you didn't go to college one I um I had my best show in Charlotte but then two North Carolina I got shouted because North Carolina got the most colleges by square footage it's a lot of Education there so it is don't none of y'all be acting stupid because it's too much education maybe okay maybe not yeah maybe because I figure out like maybe that's right yeah all right final segment that's not what the jail homies she's from North Carolina Billy Graham they got pigs yeah he kind of swole yeah you kind of short swell yeah a lot of the white pastors be like yeah first of all he'll put the blessing on you boys like that's why Keisha ain't got her black cards so many requirements I feel like no other culture does this has so many things that you don't do it like do you wear thong sandals right like they don't check for stuff like that they might do we don't know no we're not white they don't be saying that but we don't know why people press the notebook yeah right [ __ ] you ain't seen one of 60 black movies I didn't see one Spike Lee movie boy they was eating me up first one here's the thing like I saw the I saw five parties right and then people like well did you see the sensation and it's like my [ __ ] it's four five [ __ ] in public somebody took the lead singer spot like it's gonna be the same storyline you seen paid in full what you was doing in Detroit that is a very violent movie it was like eight nine years ago first of all it was really violent second of all it's called teenage years yeah I honestly honestly you didn't have time to watch movies whatever [Laughter] final segment I love these blacks all right the final segment of this show is called pick your poison it's a card game from Target uh and just has a whole bunch of random stuff okay if you want to by the way submit stories to us or pick your poison suggestions send them to internet kevonstage.com uh anything story wise just has to be old no training topics no nothing that happened this week this month it got to be old all right if you want to submit those things internet camera station here's a question for you guys pick your poison watch your partner have sex with someone else or shoot yourself in the foot somebody getting shot baby yeah you gotta get clapped up it's like damn he said well would you say keep somebody getting shot the way it goes yeah hey baby listen baby do what you got to do I'm not I'm not shooting myself in the foot do what you gotta do let's figure it out I could never be wrong girlfriend let's figure it out it's like I ain't shooting myself in the foot the foot get together no no he should I I boy you're mine that's that computer engineer your mind I don't really even love me no love and compatibility two different things that's funny that's good Keisha for real that's good how you turn that around I like that angle I never thought Keisha said how you just gonna let me know you gotta put yourself in a situation where you are at deeply in love and it's gonna it's gonna that's a tough situation I will shoot myself okay yeah if you've been married yeah love me love love Melissa there you go so what kind of gun is we shooting though 22 22 a 22. well I ain't taking no 22.99 yeah well I don't know about bad but the bones in your foot are small exactly you know you can be damaged before so you this life she living is wow this is very much an accident I learned my lesson too wait your mind back Keisha she got right over and said this you know what hey it was no okay was it your toes she ran me up she had to rerun me and then she had to run she had to rerun you ugly I'm sorry y'all I didn't mean to use that bomb but that's too bad you come to visit me my little brother was like three and people he was like he had his little toy car his little Superman like this Keisha all right this is what we're gonna do okay it was an accident she was picking me up from cheer practice I was supposed to run two laps I only ran one so I learned my lesson there number one no okay never cheat and she was black parking to go pay for my um uniform and so I was walking to the car and my coach called my name and my mom I guess she looked behind didn't see nothing whatever so when my coach called my name I stopped and was like huh and then my mom started backing up and I guess you know I guess she had looked behind and was looking this way and the car hit me I was like eight so I'm like 42 pounds so then she was because she's like I didn't see nothing like I didn't see nobody and then she's steady backing up and she ended up running over my foot so then everybody's like wait wait wait so now the car is on my foot so now she got to go back over so then my brother calls my dad he runs to the pay phones back in the day like Daddy he says somebody hit Keisha right you don't say it is my mama my daddy get up there in two minutes flat right oh no please come to ambulance because they're like who do you want only one person can ride an animal that's what you're I'm like who do you think I want right so when they asked my mom a question they ask me like has anything like this ever happened we didn't even get weapons grown up so I'm like no like what are y'all talking about so in evidence my dad's trying to be cool and then he's like did you see who did it and I was like we still don't know he don't know I'm like yeah he's like was it a man or a woman I'm like it was a woman and he's like do you recognize I'm like it was mama like my daddy's ready to kill somebody it was mama and for like that whole year I just was like pulling all types of rank like anything I wanted it was like oh if you run my foot over oh yeah oh come on I love to yeah but walking up the stairs first of all what type of LTD Lincoln Town Car y'all on your foot she was on my foot because she didn't see me so she's bagging up and I was on my foot and everybody is yelling like wait you know and she stopped so then it's not like I gotta get off her foot so you had a whole car on top of your foot yeah she had a whole Lincoln it wasn't it was a Cadillac on our YouTube called Story Time wait it was a cutlasses so yeah so we got I know we got more questions what I'm making is that your foot Will Survive okay no that that's it oh there's only one question I couldn't take it yeah I love my wife yeah and I don't have a big meat so I imagine they're gonna be going to town wait a minute [Applause] in order to have an average some [ __ ] got to be on the other side wait no but I really know the danger my [ __ ] go into town no you do gotta think about that you gotta think about that come here because Kevin Hart said that on some podcast because one of his friends I guess volunteered and he wanted a threesome and he said he had to resource of him his wife and two other people he said Till to this day he think about how that man was drilling drilling it down You Gotta Be You you got to be a strong individual myself foreign [Applause] Melissa is out and she's taking Kevin she helped me to get half yeah yeah well I'll be okay with that yeah you could take the half what I can't take is the dignity yeah yeah the dignity no I'm insecure it's the dignity that's what it is this is the first episode we shot now this is a good time yeah it's a good time follow Rome at where I'm tripping my bad uh and I roam a lot I roam alive it's Keisha keisha.e follow biloo and who is Brandon Lewis and I'm hey uh I'm getting that caffeine money no they they they ain't hit me [Laughter] all right perfect

Channel: KevOnStage Studios

Views: 36,478

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Id: 3ihjesUgCu4

Length: 42min 21sec (2541 seconds)

Published: Mon Sep 11 2023