I tried beating God of War With Only BOY - Part 1 of 2

you know I've been feeling a little lazy lately doing all these challenges putting my mental state into anarchy and praying to the Lord every night that I make it through yet another grueling challenge with my sanity but today I said no enough is enough no more praying no more mental torment this time I'm not doing the heavy lifting I grabbed my boy gave him a good old slap and sent him on his way today I will depend and heavily rely on my boy of course I can't completely beat the game with only my boy because there are certain parts where he's not available but how far can the little lad go can you defeat ogres trolls and skinny white boys all by himself our boys Nikes faster than mine can I beat god of war with only my boy come with me on this journey and you'll see how I went from absolutely despising my boy to finally loving and respecting him so of course I started out my journey by cutting down a tree and oh my god I had actually cut it down in just five swings how was a new record and my little Kratos imagination I had been pretending that the tree was my boy did I hate him no but he pissed me off on the daily you know how people are sometimes full of surprises well boy was like that except he was full of disappointments we made our way to the river and I ship chopped some logs while my boy lit some candles I quickly found out that you actually can't use photo mode during your wife's funeral trust me I tried it was time to hunt for some deer in the direction of deer and holy crow Tula's 17 seconds later the mighty beast stood before us I told boi to hold his fire but he completely ignored me and shot anyways in my testosterone fueled rage I reminded him of how much of a disappointment he was and I think I might have heard his feelings right when I thought life was good a spooky creature left out of the woods and it was up to me to give him a knuckle sandwich before I get too much farther into the adventure let me explain the rules so initially I played on the easiest difficulty and my puss no I've beaten this game fists only on the hardest difficulty so one could say I know my way around Midgard the reason I picked the easiest difficulty is because boys arrows are weak as hell and enemies have more health the higher the difficulty goes if one enemy takes 5 minutes to kill on the hardest difficulty that same enemy only takes one minute to kill on the easiest difficulty so it's not a question of skill it's a question of patience the rules are pretty straightforward as long as I'm doing nothing and boys doing everything we're good obviously I still have to use my weapons for certain areas and boy isn't always available like for example when you get sick and I have to go to Helheim but you understand what I'm trying to do here boy can use his arrows his melee attacks and his runic summons to get us through this journey while I just sit on the sidelines with my sunglasses on enjoying the view I proceeded to tell my son that he wasn't ready for literally the easiest enemy in the game and this made me immediately fail the challenge I had enough of him being completely useless and decided he was ready to shoot his first arrow my god what you want a gold medal or something out of the blue we were attacked by a troll my boy was heated and my dear was meted don't be ridiculous boy you're gonna fight that thing the boy might not have been ready to fight that draugur five minutes ago but something about a 20-foot killer troll who could eat some deer meat 50 feet without breaking a sweat made me reconsider my life choices I mean look at how scary he is I wasn't gonna risk my life fighting that thing and so the battle began at this point I was playing on the second hardest difficulty and that was clearly a mistake was the troll difficult absolutely not in fact during the entire battle he didn't even hit me once funnily enough halfway through the fight the troll completely forgot about me and put all of his effort into squashing my son since he was clearly the problem there was something really satisfying about seeing my son finally get the beating he deserved I was at peace I didn't do nothing though I gave him emotional support through the whole thing half an hour later the troll was finally defeated boy I had actually taken out the troll all by himself but there was a problem boy couldn't completely defeat this muscular hunk without my help while he was down I commanded my little lad to shoot the troll in the back I whispered sweet nothings into his ear heck I even offered him a position as a slave for the house but this didn't seem to help and he just continued to sit there crying you eat babies you have to survive everyone knows that you eat babies oh my god man he just kept crying and crying and crying and I was getting sick of it unfortunately I was forced to slop some sense into him and I finally got him to stop crying Jesus you may have taken down the troll single-handedly but I'm taking credit for the kill boy look at me look at me boy [Music] you are not ready what are you serious and so we continue to our perilous journey I set the difficulty back down to easy because Frigg that half an hour for a single troll fight was way too long and my boy was starting to really impress me he defeated an entire horde of draugar all by himself imagine my surprise when I heard a knock on the door oh boy we hadn't had a guest in a hot minute the blood of Jesus done for us today oh god it was another one of them Jehovah Witnesses I immediately told my boy to hide in the floorboards and pretended I wasn't home but like usual it didn't work these people have some kind of superpower or something there's no hiding from them so why manda counted to five and opened the door I instantly regretted my decision again prepared to die so of course boy isn't available during this fight big goof I started using the man's body to mow my lawn and for such a skinny boy he was surprisingly efficient he helped me cut down a tree we finally fixed that hole in my roof together and he ended up using me as a football it was pretty degrading no you fool don't you see he just activated my trap card this man was easy peasy just like the troll all I did was give him a good ol chiropractic adjustment and the fight was over I was a changed man after that we were blood brothers I went home got Harry Potter out of his bedroom and this is where the journey truly started a group of draugar was ahead of us and it was up to my boy to get us out of that situation what the [ __ ] did I just say to you at Reyes was really starting to piss me off but I gave him the benefit of the doubt since his mother had just died the boy got through yet another horde of demons and we arrived to a bridge I didn't see any PewDiePie's around so I assumed it was safe to cross still I knew it was smarter to send my son across first just in case the bridge wasn't safe I made sure to tell him to really hard in the center of the bridge to test its strength and darn-tootin was I ever right this bridge was incredibly unsafe was it really worth it i sat there for a good long while and ran every scenario through my thick bald head you know as much as I was disappointed in the boy I had to admit he had loss of potential so I decided to save my boy the next fight was brutal the big boys kept bullying my small lad and there was nothing I could do but watch as he cried out for my help luckily they couldn't kill him so I didn't really have anything to worry about other than completely destroying my relationship with my son revenants were easy big leveled Jumbo's were easy and I had a barrel hat you hate babies I don't know you tell me the boy and I came across some cannibals and this marked the fourth fight I had to do all by myself unfortunately my son had defended himself which meant he was now a killer like me he was really upset and I didn't blame him taking a life can destroy a man except me I enjoy it sheesh don't cry son you know what happened to the last guy I caught crying you eat baby's father Troy you're actually those trees on the other side of the bridge trust me just this once please why isn't he throwing the eggs you broken her something we do not fully understand what causes Alzheimer's disease we finally made it to Brock's upgrade table and I looked forward to upgrading my son I'd be able to upgrade his Aero damage and firing speed throughout the journey which would really come in handy later but the boy left me alone he was right there beside Brock yet he completely refused to help me no matter how many times I pressed square are you kidding me you may have killed countless dozens of enemies but that's no excuse you left me to fight alone I did pull your weight or we go home shortly after that we came across a fire troll and even though on the outside I seemed to be handling it well on the inside I was terrified this time the fight only took ten minutes and at Reyes was actually able to defeat the troll all by himself my boy was getting stronger more powerful he didn't completely have my respect but he was getting there oh my frigging God it was a bore chest Oh what's the hell I do what you said it looked like it bounced off maybe try using an arrow next time dumb [ __ ] apparently my son was practicing form I'm school because he refused to shoot an actual arrow you know I humored the boy and instead of giving him the backhand like he deserved I gave him a second chance to prove to me that he knew what he was doing yes and of course here's where I met my videogame crush I hadn't seen her in years and damn was she ever fine damn girl you grew up little at Reyes felt pretty bad about the whole situation but I assured him everything was okay I had still be giving him a good beating later for almost destroying my chances with Freya but he didn't need to know that right now we saved Freya's large piece of bacon and off we went to the spooky basement of doom we were ambushed by a platoon of flying eyeballs and as if our day hadn't been horrible enough already boys started to get choked out by one of the eyeballs and he cried out to me for help I put my hands up in the air and said sorry man not my problem that creature violently choked my son out and you probably think he died right wrong my son was used to being choked out how else do you think I woke him up every morning enemy alert enemy alert these gentlemen were the main concern for me for this challenge because they regenerate health like madmen luckily though at races arrows stun enemies that they hit so these losers never even had a chance to refill their health here a good boy boy but my celebration was instantly taken away from me I'd like to introduce you to I don't know this creatures name so I'll just call them Jeremy's Jeremy's are pretty difficult to fight why Dante because they go underground no because they're hard to aim at no these creatures are hard because for some damn reason boy does almost no damage to them I swear if a trace does a hundred damage to a regular enemy with his arrows he does one damage to any Jeremy heck I almost caved and punched the with my meathooks but no I said if I'm gonna be a masculine man like krei DOS I can tough this out so I sat there for 17 minutes while at Reyes very slowly whittled down Jeremy's health on the next battle I found out that my boy could actually smack enemies across the head which was a much faster way to kill the Jeremy's and I was very happy about that looks like the gods were on my side so I mean we came across more hell walkers boy defeated Trek very easily and off to alpha and we went again I thought these winged demons would be harder than an old man who takes a blue pill but they were surprisingly easy there's really not much to say about alpha in every single enemy was usually huddled around at Reyes since he was the real threat and there was a moment where I had to save my son from a gang of wounded demons but other than that I didn't have to use any muscle definition in this realm heck my son could even kill the ancient all by himself this really surprised me because I was sure I'd have to defeat him all I did was get my boy to shoot arrows at the ancient anytime his chest opened up and slowly but surely he was vanquished the horde part wasn't too difficult I'm not sure if these enemies infinitely spawn or if there's a set number of them but my young lad was able to carve a path for us eventually and here we finally arrived to the light of alph I'm Kratos decided he was gonna step in and I think he enjoyed the light a little too much my son was starting to be a little because he thought I enjoyed the light more than I enjoyed him was he right or wrong I don't know but what I do know is the light of Alfheim doesn't fall through goddamn bridges or shoot fake arrows and then blame me for it the boy and I had spent enough time in this place it was time to leave but oh my god the thickest angel in the West plopped out of nowhere and tried to make me his queen I didn't want any part of it I tried reasoning with the lad but nothing worked get on the ground get on the ground right now it was time for me to pull out my trap card my last uno reverse I stick to my boy on him and watch the madness unfold it was an epic battle arrows were shot grown men were screaming and my boy was finally turning into a man it was a glorious day indeed and look at all about damage phil swift would be so proud eventually the mad lad was defeated and just like the troll situation I had to do the killing blow but I couldn't do it yes indeed he was defeated so I took the law into my own hands and offered him a position as our new slave I made sure to read him his Miranda rights and offered him a nice cozy place to sleep in our cellar you're under arrest Nimrod you know he wasn't budging and he really didn't seem enthusiastic about being our slave I thought hey maybe he could be our dog but when I tried petting him it just it wasn't right if you're not with us you're against us at this point I only had one thought in my head this is a damn ugly world we live in [Music] they caught it on the blanket I don't want them I don't want them to see that there's a body oh wait let's try that again I want to do like maybe two or three more times okay well I'm calling it boys this is gonna be a two-parter well boy finally earn my respect well Freya become my sweet sugar mama and will I finally get to whisper sweet nothings into Boulder's ear find out next time on the Dante ravioli channel based on my upload schedule part two should be up in approximately seven years so make sure to subscribe to me to make sure you don't miss it and click the bell if you don't click the bell you pretty well aren't subscribed to me so make sure you click the bell as is dawn to your a vo Lee tradition how many times did I say the word boy in this video only the truest Matt lads will comment that down below thanks for watching watch my other god of war video here and I'll see you boys [Music] in my next video [Music]

Channel: Dante Ravioli

Views: 5,222,967

Keywords: dante ravioli, danteravioli, can you beat, god of war, god of war 4, gow, gow 4, god of war boy, god of war only boy, god of war with only boy, god of war 5, god of war trailer, god of war review, god of war gameplay, god of war walkthrough, god of war ending, god of war story, god of war challenge, god of war boy only, god of war boy challenge, funny god of war, gow gameplay, god of war gameplay ps4, god of war ps4, kratos vs baldur, atreus is loki, gaming, games, satire

Id: UHycOP5uaEc

Length: 15min 34sec (934 seconds)

Published: Tue May 26 2020