I became Homeless because my Family Hated Islam - My Journey to Islam

before Islam my name was Oliver Groff in Deptford I went to primary school in debt for called a Shamir primary school in class I always was talkative creative I've got bored a lot and someone said some so I would even say that I was you know black cause a little bit of trouble I like creativity saw I like Finn's like like oh I wasn't that good at art by like dramas good at Jarl mine and music and things like that so that's kind of what I live a lot like I went in to act like my mom put me into fear a company like theater companies in Deptford desert there's a theater there so like I was always active my mom put me into gymnastics because I was an active child she put me into yeah activities that would you know take my energy away because I just had so much energy I was born with a heart condition and and it like all them I was bit deaf when I was born as well so like I had like problems as so I was always in and out of hospital as well as a child missing out primary school days like it was yeah it was it was wasn't that easy but yeah I managed to like I made people laugh a lot like that's what that's what helped me through I guess and you know growing up in Deptford like it was easy just to go outside and just go on the street with your friends that's why even as an even in primary school I like to go out on the street I wasn't allowed my mom would always chase me down like she would always find out where I wasn't running me down and had a little yeah like I would always be on on this on this going outside like just just trying to have fun I guess at the end of primary school actually got excluded for swearing our teacher that that was a big thing on my primary school not and and then they someone told the teachers I had a knife on me because I like a little penknife someone told the teachers that so when I went I went to us as I when I left primary school I went to Deptford Green and at first I was a bit like skeptical I didn't want to go there but my mum my mum put me there because it was close and we moved to we knew from Deptford to New Cross that middle of New Cross so it was easy just to get to depth for green so when I went to that for gree made couple friends obviously the areas and called ghetto I was out all the time straight after school out that 13 I was already basically like selling drugs trying to make money like it wasn't easy I don't think that I was a middle child so I thought like I lost out on a lot of things like my brother would get brand-new things and then I would get that handed down by was too soon it was to ever it wasn't the right size for my little brother so he'd get brand-new things so I was always getting the the middle thing side I wanted my own stuff so I just I just went out there like us and study I'm a mum like I got it was first started as that little like not not too bad then it like 14 15 I was making a lot of money I'm not going to lie everyone everyone around knew that I was doing that by causes jealousy and I was on my own doing it like well it looked like I was on my own doing it so I was still going to school as well but that kind of started taking over more and more like and then when I got to my GCSEs past them not that like I was 11 and mostly at drama and that was good art was kind of good maths and that wasn't it wasn't that good but yeah that did the road thing took over more that I enjoyed it it gave me what I wanted and I didn't realize that people I was so young I didn't realize people can get jealous of what you have and just because I wasn't hanging around with them and sharing what I had like they tried to stop me in at 16 like 17 maybe like a big a big thing happened where I got accused where I got I got attacked and then accused of attempted murder so at 17 I run our unknown Allah run out of town and I tried to get away from it and eventually I came back and I was on bail for two years so obviously all the money thing kind of kind of stopped and I went to a trial now I went to the trial and it was for attempted murder and for GBH of intent yeah saucepan Allah I remember at bucket when I was 11 obviously I had a heart condition and it got to the point where I needed like a valve replacement so it took about like the best surgeons in the country took about seven eight hours eleven light years seven eight hours to do the operation and after that it was it was one of the biggest things that I went through and the recovery was was crazy because I was even when I wasn't allowed it back to school for months and imagine at 11 like the this is important because a year later my next-door neighbor she she died right in front of me panel and that just shows me like the year before I was out I was saved somehow that the operation actually saved me like if I didn't have the operation it I wouldn't I wouldn't have been able to go on like living and this girl she fell right in front of me for no reason she was talking to me and for no reason she fell and dad so you I was looking down at her and I realized that this is just this is part of a cycle and twelve years old that that hit me I wasn't sad I wasn't happy it was just part of a cycle that's what I took it as so but that have been on trail the first trail was was both charges and the first trial was was both charges and handle alert they they proved that I didn't attempt to murder anybody and they couldn't prove that I didn't try to cause GBH so they needed a second truck on the second trial the barrister that ad was a was a Muslim and I didn't know that until he salams someone and I was like what's that about that do you know that guy that you the salon he says no I don't know him but because he's a Muslim we say Salam alaikum which means peace be upon you that's the first kind of introduction that I had to Islam like I except for going back to the girl that died next door I went to her janazah because I thought she was mostly my family was Muslim and they asked me to come to the digitizer so I addressed in a kameez and I and I went to the mosque and I did will do and I prayed and I made duaa and the brother of the sister told me when you make a prayer make it straight to God don't make it through Jesus don't do any of that just make it to God you see what happens so I made some old young but I need some serious prayers like I remember it kind of kind of clearly and then so on the second try now that was just a GBH of intent so throughout the trial the brother was I was asking in questions he was he was telling me about Islam like about the prophets about Jesus about muhammad's allah salallahu alayhi wasalam about about about the whole thing and the similarities between Christianity and that so it opened my eyes and he saw that I was interested so he actually gave me his his own Quran then I spoke to my next-door neighbor who who I said you know I'm thinking about Islam can you can you give me some information or something any brought you brought a teacher like up they call it mustard or something like that and he fought for about for about a month came to my house every day my mom she didn't like it she don't like that my family did disagree with the whole whole thing they didn't didn't didn't like me like they didn't like this guy coming in my house with a big beard that they didn't like it that they didn't like it so they like I suppose my mom got worried because I'm and like an Asian man with a big bill and a long gown you know it's just it's not long after 9/11 like I should have I should have understood that more about you know me being me I didn't really understand that so I just I just kept kept him coming to my house and he he taught me a lot and then at the end of him teaching me about like everything he spoke about he said everything I said is from the Koran nothing is from my own words and I said because because of that I agree with everything that that you said and I want to take my Shahada so he said I must then take bottle and and and then cut I went next door and took my Shahada and it was beautiful muff when I took my Sharada as I was taking it felt like I knew the words already and my body from the feet was like it was filling up with warm water like my body was empty and it was filling up with like I don't know I can't explain the feeling properly but it's filling up with something something until got to my eyes and then I started I started crying like it was my body and my mind was so happy and I'm from that I tried you know I was trying to practice but try to keep it secret from my family because they did they already show they they decided they already show that they didn't they agree with it so every time I go to the mosque with a Khamis on I tuck it in before I go home and go in just normal like but I was still on the road don't lie still on the road and then it got to the I think what was it the first Ramadan yes I think it was the second Ramadan that I was Muslim I asked obviously I was fasting went to the mosque every day I was going to lessons as well at brother's house it was good like masha'Allah and then yeah like I done it took half in them in in the Masjid and and after like after that my mom my family they said if you want to carry on being Muslim you can't come you can't stay here so I stayed in a mosque for like months the Masjid let me stay there I was basically looking after I was basically looking after the mosque like helping out under and then got to the point where the mosque couldn't it couldn't accommodate me you know it's too long so any man took me to his house and I was I was staying with him for for a long time and then hola I was proud I was just I was practicing fully like and then I went and then I had to start staying with a brother stayed at his house he lived in a domestic so I lived with him and and you know staying in a muscular it was weird because I'm new to the Dean and I know that the mosque is is only letting me stay there cuz you know my brother and and they they have they basically have to let me stay because I've got nowhere to stay so it felt I thought I don't know I felt alone I guess that was crazy storm laughs was mad like I left I started you know when you just because I was so keen about Islam ah I started dissing all my old friends like because it was so rolled like that's distant like when I have phone calls to ring me up straight away I'm giving him gaol but it's a wrong kind of down arguing that you don't know you don't know the true flat I'm tryna tell them when I don't really know that I didn't so when I'm arguing with him I don't really have no weight in my argument I'm a new Muslim night I barely know how to pray says was it was a it was a crazy time in my life I was a crazy introduction to to to practice him because even um I did I stopped grinding in it I stopped I stopped the road thing because I really I really learned about that Dean and that was one thing that you have to come away from cuz it's not just the money you know the horror on money's it's the lifestyle you that money stays in that life starts a circle in it it's a circle like you make that money then you've got things that you got to spend that money on because it's that lifestyle you got a keep up to date with it you all get the trainers you got to get the girls you got to get you know you just got you got me I was pried it out after that 15 light/noor I had a Prada file bought it from him because it just select matches my outfit like I was I was so indulged in like I didn't know anything but that innit that's what I come from just blowing and just obviously after that just beefed and things like that that and like when I was staying in the mosque the the the people that run the mosque they didn't even I guess they didn't want to tell me to my face that they couldn't have me there no more so the email at the time that was you know leading Salah in Ramadan and like the Imam of the mosque they asked him to tell like tell me and I think my like how I saw it is he couldn't tell me just to leave that because he knows I don't have nowhere to go so he invited me to his his house and I didn't realize until years later like about three years into it into practicing that at the time every night is his wife was making my bed making me food all of this she was pregnant and I needed a mention that he just he just he just did it for the sake of Allah you know just let me stay in his house so how was I wanted to practice but like like he you know what yeah he took he took me under his wing properly like took me everywhere he was going use it he was he went to would you call him addresses like he was a busy in I'm like he did rookie I learned a lot from being around him like it was it was a good it was a good experience at the same time it was a very very difficult situation to understand lad how did I put myself here like that is it worth it I guess all them questions come and then like hamdulillah brothers what the most art you know that stadium that's my local that was my local mosque on like one of them or okay or older so the brothers did it we all know each other it was a good strong circle of brothers you know young brothers that some of them have similarities and some of them are just you know reverts from from this kind of like we just all like come together because we would China practice you know so one burr we lived near the mosque as I said any he just let me stay and it was more comfortable because he's like my age yes I was staying at the brothers house handle er I stayed there for for a long time that as long as I can remember but you know I got to know the Dean a bit more so it wasn't just me trying to blow my beard China where the fall I was actually learning this point well I was around a lot of brothers give every kind of brother like oh there's so many you don't even realize you're on a brother that's in a group don't even realize you're you're around a brother that you know that's got all tamales or whatever you don't you don't see that because as a new Muslim your sincere you know yeah well your your fresh so your China you know you're open to anything basically whereas you know I should have should have done the things that learning Arabic first whereas I jumped straight in at a deep in like there was brothers all's around I shouldn't have been around him that groups that that you just shouldn't be part of you know the a lot of people will tell you they they know this and they know that but really and truthfully they don't even know Arabic or maybe they do know Arabic but you know manipulation is is just because someone's Muslim the beard and a soul it doesn't mean that they can't trick you or they can't manipulate you into something that they want you to do so you know you have to stay steady you have to there's a thing take the middle path like there's a that's there for a reason because taking the middle path keeps you safe like go just just be Muslim in it like it's easy it's an easy way of life you're making things difficult we come from the road so we're aggressive so yeah so coming to the Dean is not it's not I'm not going to say it's easy it's not easy in it because you're you're leaving a lot behind so you still remembering that so you think everything in front of you is truth or you think everything in front of you is is good and even in Islam there's bitter so there's P there's this brothers that will prey on you a lot especially if you don't know especially if you don't go straight into learning Arabic or something like so you can read what you're being told because people will teach you things and English the English language is very limited whereas Arabic you could say one word and it means so much so I could tell you Islam means peace yeah it could do it doesn't it but it means so many things means the one who submits to align that do you understand so I can't translate something the way I want to translate it to you if I want to in it if someone's trying to manipulate you you won't even know because they've good at it in it they've been they train themselves to get you manipulated like you're not the first every most brothers that come from the road that's what they go through a lot of the time they go through pull it this arm that way that way that way like and then you get confused that's in fact like I practiced a lot and I was that in the deep and I was swimming deep I was I was I was as I said I wasn't learning all the things I should have been like Arabic and things like that whereas and then it took me it took me back away from Islam basically like ah like years later I stopped our basically stopped practicing and Allah who Adam why in it but could have been the reason in it like that was in a deep and when I should have took it slowly humdinger law guided me away from all doubt I'm not trying to say I'm perfect I'm not I'm not angel I'm like everyone does wrong things like but one thing I learned through through my whole see through my whole experiences is that you can't swim if you don't learn how to swim because you're going to drowned so you can't mistake things like passion for truth for Huck because you know if you're if you're thinking about coming to Islam or your new tits learn you might see someone shouting and and they might it might look like it's from their heart so yeah I'm down with that person like look at him look at him look he's down he's rolling I'm rolling with him black that's not always true though that there might be something else that you need you need to learn you need to learn and it's E is easy to learn just just take it easy don't so before I was all over the place I was I was going here going there shouting I was I was going to even go to protest like shouting about things I actually don't really know about we're handing their black now I'm back at square one learning my Dean you know and anything that I was associated with before I'm free from that I'd handle in there I'm back to square one I'm learning my Dean and anyone that's thinking about becoming Muslim was new to the deal they need to do the same and learn the beam barakallahu you

Channel: Digital Mimbar

Views: 253,524

Keywords: islam, muslim, muslims, islamic, quran, koran, allah, muhammad, mohammed, prophet, hadith, sunnah, shaykh, imam, lecture, khutbah, khutba, ramadan, bilal philips, sufi, salafi, hanafi, hijab, nasheed, convert, revert, shahada, dawah, da'wah, maher zain, sami yusuf, atheism, science, atheist, qur'an, recitation, surah, afasy, religion, religious, deen, madhhab, shia, sunni, I became Homeless because my Family Hated Islam, Brother yusuf, Homeless, Hated Islam, Family Hated Islam, Inspiring, My Journey to Islam

Id: QlLlrmNq-9A

Length: 21min 57sec (1317 seconds)

Published: Sat Nov 07 2015