How To Stop Playing Small And Shine Your Light

[Music] welcome to the thrivers life series the creation of your highest and your best life after narcissistic abuse now I've got a little bit of a cold so if a cough or a sneeze you'll know why and I know a lot of people in Melbourne have got a cold at the moment it's freezing not by some of your standards but by hours it is okay so today's topic is one of my favorite because this is one which has plagued me greatly so much so that I've needed to do a lot of work around this namely the fear of shining my light and playing large in life and I adore the beloved Marianne Williamson quote which many of us you know many of you you're going to be familiar with this one and it goes like this our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate our deepest fear is that we're powerful beyond measure it's our light not our darkness that most frightens us and we ask ourselves who am I to be brilliant gorgeous talented fabulous actually who are you not to be you're a child of God you're playing small does not serve the world there is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you we're all meant to shine as children do we were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us it's not just in some of us it's in everyone and as we let our own light shine we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same as we are liberated from our own fear our presence automatically liberates others and she is so right but this is not what we were taught through admonishment and being told children are seen and not heard or even being punished for expressing our unique selves so many people in my generation and naturally repressed we're terrified about fully being cells and this differs from many children are today who were raised with greater opportunities and encouragement of self-expression and not to take anything away from men who were also dim down in regard to my sisters there's an enormous female collective wound of playing small because in nearly every woman's DNA is a terror about speaking out having her own dreams and rights and being in her power centuries ago women were burned at the stake by the millions for being women expressing their womanhood and it's only less than 150 years ago that the suffragette movement was orchestrated by incredibly brave women who against all odds started to allow women to have rights in the developed modern world tragically in many parts of the world this is still not the case as thrivers regardless of if we are male or female this part of the puzzle is essential being ourselves shining our light and playing our life out loud in a big way how else can we connect to our Damas how else are we going to be a sole fully expressed a source flowing through us as us will we be able to actualize our missions and make this world a better place by revolutionizing relationships and systems if we hide out tuck ourselves away and dim down No are we able to be fully happy without living as our true self no and this is why this the thrivers life episode is so important because most of us who were narcissistically abused already had a predisposition to hand our power away dim down walk on broken glass and keep ourselves small as to not put other people's noses out of joint many people believe that narcissus went after us for our light yes that was true but they also could only target us if we were not fully and powerfully anchored in it and even though we were giving incapable people who had a lot to offer people we were still precariously stuck in the beliefs that other people were big a stronger and more capable than us we were not healthfully partnered in our own power and light and it was the smaller broken terrified to stand fully in the light places that subconsciously decided you narcissus are my source of self and I need to do all I can to retain you so that you can love me and keep me safe until we became a true source to self false selves can be very alluring it's like the glitter that wasn't the gold additionally many of us had literally come from epigenetic wounds or past life embedded traumas in our energy fields in regard to having to go underground literally or cloak our true identities because if we were discovered for who we really were we would be eliminated maybe we were the wrong race or religion or held beliefs against the system that deemed us as heretics so was it any wonder that when the narcissus grand standard took center stage and demanded that all and sundry gravitate around him or her or be punished that we stayed and we acquiesced we weren't free to express our dreams and missions we lost ourselves our resources and health that was needed for these dreams and missions as we let the narcissus siphon all of that out in our attempt to survive so we then so without we were play in our subsequent lifetimes an evolution the composition of our emotional energy fields if all of this was previously familiar to ourselves and/or our ancestors we can be highly susceptible to living the same again until we go inside and release and reprogram these traumas after recovery from narcissistic abuse not only do we need to heal the deep traumas and fracture that narcissistic abuse activates within us we also need to find a way going forward to be our truest selves so that we vibrate in a universe where false selves are as repelled by us as a vampire is - a bright spotlight and the greatest way that we ever achieve this is by freeing ourselves and then no longer dimming down and hiding our true selves away let me share with you my terrors regarding this topic which I know is so many of yours as well I certainly believed if I exposed who I was that I would be targeted torn down even annihilated or people would abandon me compete with me or invalidate me which is painful so as a result of this I wouldn't let people know who I really was I felt what's the point additionally I also strongly believed men cannot tolerate capable and powerful women you must doom down to have a man because you can't have a man and your mission and I know many many women in the community of struggle with this one also fortunately totally expressing Who I am is something that I've been able to do in this community and I've healed my beliefs at that level I also now thank goodness have healthy beliefs that men can actually accept accomplished women as their partners that definitely no longer plagues me however i 100% know that i still have work to do on my close intimate relationships in regard to who i am can a life partner fully share in and be interested in what I do on my mission also if you were to meet me out socially still to this day I can struggle with expressing who I am and what I do I'm much more likely to ask people about their lives and have conversations centered around that and personally fade into the background yes I know that I'm doing my mission in through MTA but really isn't that countless other people I could be touching and inspiring in everyday life as well don't people come together in the most random ways for a reason and as I'm creating this episode for you right now I know I still have more work to do around this topic much more in fact okay so let's all together now look at the beliefs that need work and shifting to fully claim and bear light for self others and our planet and I fully suggest working with the goal-setting module in nap or in your empowered self course module work with the following in a work and my suggestion is to start by clearing all the resistance to these goals because we want to be a 10 out of 10 on them we want to be a match with them the first one is I am free and safe to be myself next one as my true self I'm bringing heaven onto earth for the greatest divinity for myself and others as my true self I am heard seen and met healthily in abundance as my true self I am Locke others and inspire them to be their true selves also as my true self I am God guiding source sourcing creation creating whatever works for you this is the most correct and natural state for me to ever be I love that one it's very powerful now let's look at the specific wounds that we may need to target to clear and I suggest clearing everything that feels limiting on this topic ok so if I am my true self I will be abandoned and I elated rejected invalidated ignored punished however it feels to you when you feel into that and that specific inner work will help you so much and this is what I find exciting how off how awesome it is that in this day and age we can be ourselves in so many ways we can get our messages out we can have our beliefs and we can express who we are this is the Golden Age of powerfully being able to create change if we throw off our shackles and really claim and express who we are so are we in I am in fact I'm going to go and do some empower which powered self quite a freedom healing ship work on this stuff as soon as I can because I want to go to the next level with this stuff okay I really do believe that this episode is going to resonate with many of you because it's a really big and important topic and I'd love you to share with me your thoughts and your feelings about this and I'm so excited to answer your comments and questions regarding this episode I really am it's going to be amazing and remember after narcissistic abuse recovery gloriously we take it further why because we can lots of love pave [Music] you [Music]

Channel: Melanie Tonia Evans

Views: 17,518

Rating: 4.9292603 out of 5

Keywords: thriving after abuse, narcissistic abuse recovery, thriver's life series, melanie tonia evans, ptsd, npd, emotional abuse, trauma bonding, fear what others think, fear what others will say, loneliness, after narcissistic abuse, healing from narcissistic abuse, dating after narcissistic abuse

Id: ua_kcZwio4E

Length: 12min 42sec (762 seconds)

Published: Mon Jul 23 2018