How To Properly Set Dates

hi I'm coach Corey Wayne and this is my video coaching newsletter and the topic of today's newsletter is going to be how to properly set dates I'm seeing a lot of emails that I'm getting from guys I'm also noticing this pattern happening with some of my phone coaching clients and it seems to me that some guys struggle with learning the difference being able to balance the difference between being direct and hanging back and so the result is up being is that when it comes to making a definite date with a woman so she'll actually keep it and you can go and have your date and have a great time obviously get laid to do sir have a relationship get a girlfriend get married whatever it is that your objective is but the key is is like I said is that I seem to have what ends up happening is they end up leaving the plans up in the air instead of being direct and making a definite date on basically in essence what they're doing is the woman makes herself available by contacting him like in this particular case it's an ex-girlfriend he hasn't heard anything from him in four months and so she's doing sexual innuendo on the phone and she's talking about getting together and wrestling with him again so he could teach her new moves and stuff like that and then he doesn't make it definite date he just kind of leaves it up in the air and essence he's throwing it back in her lap hoping that she'll make the plans and she'll make the next move and a woman doesn't want to do that I mean she's already calling him to make herself available but yet he's just with a few subtle tweaks he can get his approach perfect and she'll be coming over in no time so I'm going to start going through his email here because he's a really good email he's doing a pretty good job of things but like I said that one thing he's doing wrong is he's just not being directing and getting the point and making a date and getting off the phone so he says hey Corey I've read your book several times and I have been applying the methods at every opportunity about seven months ago my girlfriend of four years and I broke up she was unhappy as I was act needy and jealous she won a distance space and time apart it turned out just a few weeks later she was dating someone new she probably had them lined up already a lot I'd say probably the majority of women are like that they like to have other guys that they know or that her friends especially when they're dating a guy and they either know it's not going to go anywhere or they don't think it's going to go anywhere or they don't think it's going to last because it's you know you understand women are emotional beings and you know I think in some ways they probably experienced the pain of rejection a lot more intensely or a breakup a lot more intensely than us guys do the difference is is that they'll actually be proactive about going out and getting another guy or lining up another dude so she's not sitting home moping about the break-up she's moving on with her life and that's one thing that you know the women really seemed to have an advantage over guys these guys tend to sit around and sulk for months and months and months sometimes years at a time whereas women they're just right away they're they're trying to end the pain they're trying to get jump right back out into a relationship or a rebound relationship so they lose the attachment that they had to the guy that they split up with so it's a lot easier emotionally to recover and move past and get on with their lives he says I chased her with a few months with no success and that's when I stumbled across your book since then I've not contacted her reached out to her or truthfully even thought of much about her and that's awesome that you can do that because most guys that I see emails from and even some of the guys that I coach they really struggle with letting the pass go letting a relationship go when there's been a breakup and moving on and you've done a good job you followed my advice you focused on succeeding and hooking up with other women and so it puts you in a non hungry state and it's like four months have gone by and because you're having so much fun with these other women it's like it's really not a big deal and so you've made it easy on yourself to move forward and this whole time that you haven't talked to her you've been practicing your skills and so now you're getting better and so when she calls you out of the blue you're not in a non hungry state where you're chasing her like you once did which is what turned her off in the first place so good job on that because most guys just don't have the balls to do it it's really hard it's really tough so he says about three weeks ago I get a text message and it's from my ex wanting to just say hello and see how I am it's shocking how walking away and never looking back when a woman dumps you or breaks up with you somehow miraculously causes her to give you a call sometimes months later when it doesn't work out with the other dude or whatever it's just amazing how powerful that is because you women really love a guy that can't have their way with and when you just say I'm not into this just being friends thing only or you know you're with another guy oh hey give me call it doesn't work out it's the best way to be he says a weight of the day then I responded kindly and flirted a bit I cut the conversation after a few minutes and said nice talking to you about it that's great because really you were just it probably was out of the blue and you were surprised to hear from her and set your hook another woman you probably saw it in your phone you're like you know busy I'll get to you tomorrow kind of thing and the fact was you know what was great is you exercise extreme self-control and you didn't even bring up getting together or nothing because I mean let's face it she basically blew you off and dumped you for some other guy and now she's basically coming crawling back and you're not in such a rush which causes her to wonder where she stands with you maybe she wonders because you didn't say anything about your dating life so she's assuming probably or that you may be taken and so what this does it causes her a week later because she's you know the old you would have called her hey where you been how are you I've been trying to make something happen and instead you're doing nothing which is great because she calls you the next week and basically what she says is the next time she texts him she says she started talking about she started doing sexual innuendo and she says I want a wrestle I need to show I want you to show me your new moves and so that tells me right there that she wants to have physical contact with you and wrestling play wrestling obviously leads to sex and you know that's what that's what's on her mind maybe she got dumped maybe there's another guy coming in and out of the background that's the other thing you keep in mind with these situations is if she's making a break from some other dude and possibly looking to hook back up with you you got to keep in mind is one minute she could be really hot for you the next minute she's totally cold in other words she's emotionally wrapped up in this other guy and then he does something right and it caused her to be confused and not one and a wonder where she stands or if she should go with this other guy or hooked back up with you and that's why the best thing to do is is nothing at all let her and this other guy figure it out and should get in touch with you as you go about your life and so you're doing a beautiful job so far what I see there and so he says he says I guess she was headed out on vacation so he says when you when you come back I will allow you to seduce me that's great it's beautiful it's charming you could also said you know if you're really sweet charming when you get back maybe you'll get lucky sweetie just say like that you know however you guys used to talk to each other when you're in your flirty suite you know where you you you talk googly eyes and you go gaga with each other or your baby talk our does he do it or the little cute nicknames that she made up for you or you made up a herd that's always a fun way to just you know put yourself right back into that place it's just acting act like nothing ever happened always treat her like your girlfriend always treat all women like your girlfriend and your sweetheart and your honeying and you know a girl that you love and you dar and you appreciate you celebrate her so she came back the next week and texted again this time she wasn't as sexual in a bit less flirty and I would say she's probably testing you but also you at this point because she's texting you again you should just got right to point made a definite date but nonetheless she reached out to me instead of me chasing her I attempted to arrange a date and she said she was busy on Thursday so in other words what you did was you said hey how about we get together Thursday and she said I'm busy so the question is did you wait long enough when she says I'm busy I can't do it Thursday and then you just you don't say nothing it's a technique from sales because in say when you give a client a number or a figure you say nothing and you wait for them because you who speaks first is the one that loses the negotiation and so in this particular thing thing you know she's wanting to get together in wrestling she's texting you and contacting you and so you say how about Thursday and she says I can't do it Thursday and then you just sit there silent and you don't say nothing because the silence is deafening as we used to say in sales so what'll happen is she'll start she'll have to say something and when she does say something cuz what you're waiting for is you're waiting to see how badly she wants to see you if she really wants to see you she'll when she says I can't do a Thursday but how about Wednesday of next week or Saturday or so whatever it happens to be she'll offer another day and if her interest is kind of low or whatever and she doesn't say anything she says well I can't do it Thursday you know maybe we can do it some other time and you go great you know just give me a buzz when you're free and well I'd love to get together and see you just that's the way you leave it leave it that but the best way to handle it is instead of asking for a day you know especially if you're unsure what her schedule is just say what days are you free to get together question mark I'm off Tuesday and Wednesday it's a great how about Wednesday at 8 o'clock just and I would invite her to come over your place because it was a girlfriend you were with for several years and so you know keep mine she dict you around you know she hooked up with some other guy right after you broke up and so you should make her work to get you and so with you know at the end of the day I'm not going to go out of my way to take her out and wine her and dine her on all this crap because I want to see that she's going to treat me properly and so I just invited a vital over to your place a bunch come on we'll make dinner bring a bottle of wine or have it bring the food you bring the drinks whatever it happens to be that's the best way to handle you know that particular situation instead of offering a day just just say what day is he available and then pick one of those and then that way you make something definite and so he basically says and then another time she texts them and he says well I'm busy most of the weekend but if sunday works for you let me know and again your that tells me just kind of being vague in your league leaving it in the air because again you're trying to pin her down to a date and waiting for her to say yes or no to that so she's being kind of vague like this it's easier just to say what days are you free and get right to the point and say great why don't you come over Sunday or whatever it happens to be this week again she texted me and I said I was busy but if she wanted to come over and hang out to call me you know this might work after several weeks but the point being is you're basically you're still leaving it up in the air and so instead of saying that I would just just said hey what days you free great how about Tuesday you know if it's one of the days that she offer that's the best thing that you can do in that particular situation it's a subtle difference but I mean it's a big difference and so I would say that you know you were great at first by being vague and you know the fact that she brought up wrestling you made her reveal her cards and that's what's beautiful about using these techniques is that you can talk to the other person and they think you're just having a conversation but what you're really doing is you're gauging their desire to actually see you and even you know you know because there could be another guy in the picture too you know so you really don't know and by doing this like week after week and you're not all over her like you used to be it's confusing to her you're basically acting like a busy successful guy who is successful with women would act and she's starting to respond to this and so the next time she contacts you ask her what day she's free Megan definite date say awesome looking forward to it I'll see you then it's the best way to handle it so if you find this message of value you can show your appreciation by going down the Webby toolbar which is at the bottom of your screen if you're watching this video on my website and click the Pay Pal donate button and donate any amount that you feel is equal to the value of the information in this video at the very least please share this page with all your friends and family by clicking any one of the social networks sharing buttons which are also located too will be a toolbar at the bottom of your screen and if you have a question that you want to ask me there's a topic that you'd like me 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Channel: Coach Corey Wayne

Views: 142,472

Rating: 4.9104338 out of 5

Keywords: How, To, Properly, Set, Dates

Id: tp9K3VQ1Xxs

Length: 13min 49sec (829 seconds)

Published: Thu Apr 26 2012