How to deal with Parents' EXPECTATIONS? Sadhguru Answers

I said Guru welcome to Australia and I have a question um sometimes we get a new situation when we're surrounded by people who is have a very high expectation to in terms of us and when we cannot fulfill the expectation you start feeling a very terrible feeling of guilt and it's okay when it's your mother-in-law you can kind of go for that but sometimes it's your parents for example I have no problem I have nothing against her I just joking and sometimes it's the people who's very close to you like your parents and you cannot really fulfill the expectation because you would like to do in your life what you want to do and obviously it's not what they want and how to cope with that feeling of guilt and also what do you think what kind of relationship should be between the parents and the children thank you [Applause] uh that reminds me of something see one thing is it's not just between parents and children just about every relationship everywhere people have all kinds of weird expectations it's like this a lady went to the butcher shop and all this chicken which were hanging upside down dressed chicken poor chicken feathers are their dress you rip it off and say they're dressed laughs so she went to this chicken and lifted one leg smelled wrinkled her nose lifted a wing wrinkled her nose like this she was going from chicken to chicken it was having an effect on the rest of the customers so the butcher saw it's having an effect so he went and tapped on her shoulder she turned it on so he asked ma'am can you pass a test like that it's a whole lot of people are always busy putting everybody to test that they themselves cannot pass especially parents parents think all the things that they could not do they must achieve through their children so they should have bred racehorses I want you to understand this children are not your property it's it's a privilege another life came through you must enjoy it do your best to nourish it what it becomes is not your business your business is to support it create a wonderful atmosphere around it create an Ambience where it grows well I'm using the word it consciously like a tree like a plant you just create the nourishment that it needs it grows well is it going to Bear apples pears mangoes or just flowers or just nothing we don't know only thing is your wish is they must grow to their full potential they are not an extension of your ambitions they're not and they need not be so this is because people think they own their children no they're not your property I think these days they're telling you older generation hesitated to say this this generation by the time they're 10 they're telling you you got no business to tell me what to do so does it mean to say you don't say anything to them no it's your business to see because if you don't guide them somebody else will on the street or somebody will do it long distance on the internet all kinds of creatures are out there all right so yes to protect them to nourish them to allow them to explore their possibilities it is your business to do that as a parent but parents concern may be what will happen what will happen what will happen I my dear father he's 95. uh he's a physician in his mind that generation of Indians will understand that unless you become a physician you're no good so I was no good [Laughter] but that was good for me because when you're no good nobody pays enough attention that's all I wanted did they leave me alone so I'm just saying you know he's always worried what will happen to this boy his concern is this this boy has no fear in his heart what will happen so one day when I was 11 years of age he said this you know I came home with a 12-foot Cobra he was my friend and he said this boy has no fear in his heart what will happen then I asked him when did fear become a virtue when did this happen he said see you I told you he has no fear in his heart I said that's fine but when did fear become a virtue why is it like this why fear anger all these things have become virtuous is it tell me when you go through fear is it fantastic hello it's one of the most terrible emotions you can go through why are we thinking that we should be fearful of our future not only of your future of anything that you do on your even God fearing all right fearful about everything what is the point there is no such thing there is no such thing that this generation should be an extension of the previous generation this generation should do something the previous generation could not imagine that is when there is a purpose to this generation isn't it otherwise what's the point if you're going to do the same things [Music] well if you want to do something that you really want to do if you think you're going to do it with everybody's approval I'm sorry life doesn't happen that way it is just that whatever the hell you want to do just do it well once there is Success your parents and your uncles and your aunts everybody says wonderful all right they want success they're only afraid they have every right to be concerned about you they have every right because they brought you up they're concerned whether you will do well or not they have every right to be concerned but that concern should not become control foreign

Channel: Being Enlightened

Views: 14,856

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Id: gE7LydVnAwQ

Length: 8min 10sec (490 seconds)

Published: Wed Aug 30 2023