How To Choose A Partner

[Music] I'm very excited about science that can speak um I've always wanted to meet him in person I listen to every Saturday morning husband and I when we are doing our chores and then one should say something I like I'm like I'm listening are you here you know so I'm really excited that she's here sometimes she speaks no sense all the time and the night sort of has but she's so wise how what did she get this from you know but I'm excited that she sounds which would you separately second speakers lady Reverend idly she would Mill's she's the lawyer by profession and she serves another ministry of her husband bishop Dockyard Mills who is the found I am Presiding Bishop of the lighthouse chapel international just for children and it's amazing I know and she she's the preacher she's that speaker she speaks internationally locally she speaks with all manner of people pouring out her life and her experiences and what God puts on her hearts for the people as people and she has this program as I said early on honey on my lips or Saturday mornings I absolutely fell in love sometimes during the week when of there has been a misunderstanding you know and then it's Union and it's like oh okay I are you listening and and we are just blessed to have been our presence I just want us to give a warm round of applause for lady Reverend hallelujah shall we just pray I need Thee Oh I need thee [Music] we me eat thee Oh bless me now my Savior I come um to Ruthy oh I need tell the Holy Spirit you need him this morning he's the one who knows where to touch we're two minutes at us Oh Thank You Holy Spirit he you are called to help us you are called to teach this morning without you we can do nothing we thank you fill this place full of clay take a patrol atmosphere yeah thank you for your me thank you [Music] to the Holy Spirit this morning come and have the preeminence amongst us I pray that you anoint this vessel of clay anything that is untoward in this vessel Lord may your messy set aside may the grace of God which brings salvation bring salvation in different forms to your people I pray for the anointing Lord is not he that winneth no he that runneth but you who show mercy let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable unto you I come against every high thing that exalts itself above the knowledge of God and I pull it down I pull down every stronghold that opposes the things of God and I say O God let that be freakos and let your weight be glorified in Jesus name Amen hallelujah please take your seats it's a privilege to be here amen now I've been asked to speak about how to choose a partner as a lawyer I was blessed by mrs. taco news peace and the fact that Christian growth is the first thing and I've taken some notes on the second amen and it is true that your accountant whatever you really need to balance your life and juggle your life otherwise you'll lose out on one of them amen now you said I should speak about how to choose a life partner as a lawyer Romans 3:11 says that God is no respecter of persons He Man maybe you chose it as a lawyer that when the lawyers choosing a mate what should the lawyer look out for isn't it but I think that basically the first thing is the fear of the Lord you need to look out for somebody who fears God because the Bible says that the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom amen the Bible also says there's so many promises to those who fear the Lord now as you choose a life partner what will sustain your marriage is not your beauty because your beauty will fade if you like when as Miss Ghana 2005 whether she's given up a title and as Miss Ghana 2013 whether she's not about to give up a title so beauty the Bible says in proverbs 31 charm is deceitful you see sometimes people get husbands and wives by pretending to be charming or maybe they are charming but they are not able to hold on a charm for so long do you see so the Bible says charm is deceitful and beauty is vain it's not a beauty a good thing but it is vain in the sense that it doesn't achieve anything it will be nice to look at whatever by every way you get married to somebody for a while familiarity you become used to the beauty and that's why some people say that this man is a nice wife how could he have gone for such a shrimp because he has gotten used to that beauty and also because beauty is know everything so that fear of the Lord is what is going to keep you and keep your marriage like justice Trudy said keep your hair on do you understand that's what is good because marriage is also for the long haul marriage is a marathon is not a sprint you just go 100 meters - when you've reached and then we also have an idea of marriage because we save in inches or require where I don't know how to speak to you in fancy or okawa Dulce so we imagine that a warrior is something that has been created and then you just but I have news for you marriage is hard work and marriage is what you are going to make you are not going to do is not that it has been built and constructed as auj I just going to live inside the marriage there's nothing like that it is you who is going to put something into that marriage and the first pillar the first foundation that you must put is the fear of God amen and many of us when we are in love we don't want to look for the fear of God in people I'm a pastor I see it all the time even men come and say what I do every I found somebody you will be surprised some time ago I asked some missionaries I was outside Ghana we are the program and then there were missionaries in the southern region of Africa so they had come for the convention so two of them came and said I'm looking for a life partner can you help me but I want to marry a ganyan I said me a very good matchmaker but at least I can find out from you so I asked them two men two young men what are you looking for tell me so that when I see the person I'll see whether what you are looking for tank-top Kingdom on custom missionaries who have given their lives to Christ to go to a mission field to welcome us for about 36 she must have and he is 44 now let me tell you that the Wednesday time comes with a touch he 44 will not solve the situation neither will pass I was shocked so I said no I'm sitting here alone with you and nobody will believe so let me call my peace so the way two of them I thought maybe first a bridge of my own we're sitting here it was the Shaylee come come so they search with me and I say I just want them to know what you are looking for so that we can help you who were telling lady Reverend that at least by 66 and we have 44 they repeated it then I I started to preach was going to help you you must really whatever and then we left do you know that one of them came to mommy and then when he admits the person he brought the passage to my office my staff were they I came to introduce the person and lo and behold it was actually hit 44 so even though you may be moved by sight it is not the most important thing amen and when I told my husband he said that how do they know the measurements and I am sorry to say that even though he married him 40 44 his ministry has virtually ended with him 44 you see I'm so surprised that my prophecy has come to pass so quickly I'm shocked and saddened that's what has happened he came he brought the lady I spoke to her are you sure you can move with such a person whatever hit 44 you've got the hips what has it done a few of God it's the beginning of wisdom a fear of God is watching because your husband will not be faithful to you because of your beauty you'll be faithful to you because that's the other law your wife will not be faithful to you because you are the greatest man on earth you may be but you have your faults and she to half efforts but the thing that will keep her going is that that's the law she fears God and what has happened in the body of Christ is that nowadays we don't have any nevertheless in our lives you don't Peter said after all denied I've not got anything nevertheless at your weight Jesus said I knew I came to die whatever I faced was will let the cup pass nevertheless at your will but like so sometimes it's like really in love with this foolish man you understand but in spite of my feelings nevertheless what God's word has said and in marriage you may not feel like forgiving your husband but nevertheless because God said it you will be surprised at this person that when you don't see how goosebumps you can't whatever when he are nice you don't want to be your little toe to touch him but then nevertheless will keep you going amen but we don't have any nevertheless now we just react I'm angry I you see because you don't know God you have never cultivated your relationship with God God is not the most important person in your life so when something happens is how I feel how could he do this and in the end we walk out but we are not prepared to die on the cross we don't think that you see the books you read the movies you watch they don't bring out what marriage really is you know we just see some movie a train is moving then the pitter-patter of the rain then the girl's face is touched and glued to the pain and she's just looking and they are crying saying oh if I marry couch oh that's how it should be but you are living in a movie they don't show conflict they don't show misunderstanding they know short things we don't understand they don't show that sometimes you are let down there's no such thing I used to read a lot of Mills and Boon you know and the Lord told me at the point that this milsim Boone that's not the real life and so Mills and Boon would tell you that when you are looking for a partner he just has to have a deep voice hi baby tell me what is they going to contribute to the marriage so we watch things and we read things and and then we went free my mind's from day but we must actually frame our minds based on the Bible the fear of God you come he said maybe I want to marry this man on tomorrow's my said is she born again that she know God she said thank you every piece he the black American and so what does that compensate for the fact that a person doesn't know God it's only the fear of God that will keep your marriage I mean the Bible says are even when people have made mistakes and married unbelievers they will be warned by your conduct 1st Peter chapter 3 by your conversation when they look at you how you are holy in your weddin in your deed that is what might turn his heart to God so it's very important to know God for yourself and knowing God for yourself means like justice Trudy said reading the Word of God for yourself the Word of God is better than graphic and times and delegate and your briefs when anything comes knocking at your door you cannot cause in ryuko to react or - you can't constitutional lawyer when I caught this wilkinson and bouncing it will help later or not it will not so it's true that we are lawyers and we work with the tools of our profession and all that but the real foundation is a personal relationship with Jesus Christ and I get past justice Trudy said she wakes up early in the morning me I sleep very late when the whole world has slept that's when I sleep and then I wake up at 2 not by design it just happens so everything I have to do I do it to them by 5 o'clock my sleep has come fully for what reason I don't know but because my little daughter is still at home and has to go to school then I have to get up and get her ready and all that but you need to develop a prayer life of your own because you throw so many things that you so many things in fact the grace to cope the strength to cope with the different vicissitudes of life and all that it is the people that know they are God who shall watch strong and do exploits so you need to know God for but Christians of today we just come the preacher we don't even search to see the script Chester so we just leave it whatever the pastor says is true but the book of Acts says and the Christians or barrier there were more noble than the ones in Thessalonica why because they search the Scriptures daily to see if those things were true Paul is preaching and people are searching the Scriptures Great Wall is which but we don't say anything we are a manpower for what a schock better so you need to know God for yourself the at times in your prayer topic would be your husband and the attention his prayer topic would be you there are times your prayer topic would be your children not touch them Lord what is your choice for their lives not what is your decision Lord keep them as they go here look anything that you have it comes with a responsibility so if you have children the more you have the more your responsibility not only financial but emotional everywhere they are people you don't know you know when we are going up to we feel that about they were in disbelief as a smile it's not like that so the fear of God is very important you must know the Scriptures for yourself you must quote the scriptures to yourself the woman with the issue of blood she said to herself if I would touch his garments up Jesus quoted scriptures to the devil and the devil also knew scriptures and most of us in the body of Christ now that devil knows more scriptures on you and you don't even know how to apply the scriptures so when you get angry say hey this Pizza I'm packing my things I'm great the Bible says what what God has put together sometimes I'm people come in they change we signed in court so it's not going to put us together today - Reverend I think I can check out I said no God respects the laws of the land anyway you marry in church you still sign because God respects the laws so you can't say based on that that you are just going No so the fear of God is very very very important and sometimes we don't look out for that we look for the wrong things somebody told me I want to marry a tall man so the way needs speaking to me I would say what are you saying minds are not even spiritual we don't choose things that will last you understand we choose things like that brothers you choose shimmery shiny things my husband says anything you see that strikes you it has been stricken by many people email and I think that you also have to prayerfully consider you know your ways acknowledge him and he shall direct thy paths proverbs chapter 3 and then some 37 says commit your way unto him Trust also in him and he shall bring it to pass so you need to ask the Holy Spirit as many as are led by the Spirit of God not as many as are led by their emotions as many as are led by money you know some people feel oh I have to marry a does that person I was just talking to somebody she said me before I marry I will ask him can you take me to the Bahamas every year so one might be crying she the most important thing with me I must blow time can you give me money for this she said I myself two cars packed in my house a four wheel drive and a Benz if you can provide these things then come as a husband but many people have all these things and they are still not happy they still don't have a fulfilled life so you need to ask God about everything you do you know your ways just acknowledging some of you you think that God will say - is that even though you don't like him he went hey who wants the Bible says that if you be willing first oneself when he's talking about marrying the flower of your youth and all the because of time I will read some scriptures but he says is willing to marry you that's it so marry somebody who appeals to you but still ask God what he thinks amen because his God who owns the future it's God who knows but we do so many things I was brought up as a Christian to acknowledge God in everything so whether it's business whether whatever I'm doing you know whatever event I'm going to do whether it's something to do with me personally what if I just say Lord I acknowledge you as for your hand your favor helped me direct me you know many of us we are know used to that even learning you see I was in the same discussion group with mr. pempek and I'll tell you a secret our discussion group was a unique one because we discuss and everything and then at a point we say charlie we are tired let's listen to some weight then we'll put a message in a who freaked out in the place then later where we go for lecture some people say can I join you then we just look at each other I will say that you can join us so every day we want to come to your discussion that you say you can't join us the win no way because after that jobs like you also cook something your love would not make and so many thing for would continue our discussion let me I tell you to join us it's a problem you understand we have a discussion that Charlie let's just speak in tongues in the middle of it I mean we are such great let's just speak in tongues then we speak in tongues we're happy do you see but you can join our discussion could get to be a per-user this with you're not serious when the reason we need your love they are these just by the way but what was I saying the things of that things of God can really be a carryover for you do you understand but when you are looking out you should acknowledge God because God knows the future god knows what it hurts you don't know even your presence you don't know so you have to acknowledge God in everything that you do God will not force you to marry somebody you don't like when Isaac was arranged with Rebecca Abraham sent his seven ahead when the seven got there and he thought that he had found the right person he also said that let's go to your house and find out whether you are willing to go so your willingness it's also important now some people say I don't believed in arranged marriages I believe I must meet the person myself I think that there are different ways of killing a cut and there are different ways in which God brings people your way sometimes there are two people you think they are suited but they have not seen each other not just going in circles in circles in circles such as I missed some young men and they'll bring somebody late 11 this is the one I want to bring okay how long have you known each other for then you went to follow this message from Congo especial from Zimbabwe this person from I didn't think about her because we were friends but marriage is about friendship but sometimes God will open your eyes so that you will see who the person is amen and then also marry somebody whose values and vision and purpose is in line with yours Amos chapter 3 verse 3 can any two walk together except they be agreed can any two walk together Amos chapter 3 verse 3 except they be agreed so you may be a Christian but you may not have the same values same vision everybody is going a different direction you want to take your law career to a certain degree this passage just says I don't believe in education true but you wear my name then everything uses and we are booked alone I knew you do not respect me you see especially female lawyers have that problem you are already to your type before you even marry you see people just assume that once you are a lawyer you are to noon you are difficult to marry you don't have the fruit of the Spirit you are quarrelsome and contentious and laticious that's what they think before you start when I met my husband one of the things he said was that he was just a president of my fellowship but one of the things he said was my father is a lawyer and I can never imagine marrying a female lawyer but there was nothing we are just chatting as friends my father is a lawyer I can never imagine marrying a female lawyer I said why the female version of my father it will not be easy but I think that as we became friends and we moved along then perhaps he saw that it wasn't necessarily a female version of your father but when you have seen the lawyer you just have that and the way you go and say that you're on the bench is waste we a judge and it was somebody power so look for somebody who has the same values that the present value God like we value God that's the present value that things of God like you value that things of God what does the president think about education what does the president think about self-development what does the person think about of course the president's outlook on life do you understand some people believe that if you're a woman and they get guests you should never come to the city room and should never contribute to the conversation they themselves may be very educated and some near lawyers I like that they really bullied their wives because it's like knowledge has come a lawyer so and we will pick this up as we are friends with a person as you have friends that passes so many things will come up I think that we see a lot of things but because we are in love is the love is blind but the neighbors are not you are but those of us standing around we are not and you seen many signs that God will show you you say oh it would be better some quick I said he driven she has such a world temper that last time I went to a she was angry she poured all this two away many way she would change Hey the Holy Spirit has been working in here for how many years and it has not been easy for the Holy Spirit now you are going to change that person how does the person handle money now there's a person value money how does the person who treats other people she's probably going to treat your family like that what does the president say about baby mothers and fathers of other people and me answer me I don't believe that I believe that the family is a nuclear family and it's true but sometimes some of those things will give you science as to the type of person you are marrying how does the person feel about respecting women some people don't believe that a woman is anything you can see all the values you can see the vision you can see the peppers and then you still say love but marriage takes more than love it does so you need to see beyond your love you see and you need to be realistic in your seat because God gave you eyes so that you can see amen some of you you are going with people who are already very unfaithful already so unfair every day he makes you oh you know this girl I just feel oh you know this girl I just see you every day you are doing that when I'm I am you become more stable based on what God has given us wisdom a has shown you so many things but you are refusing to see if you are going to marry somebody who cannot cook you say well women she can cook chicken coop are you asking to do light soup you don't know whether is bald water with what you need to and many of your ladies in this morning that you can't cook mahathma says can't cook once cook chance cook do you see and you can see it one brother told me every time when visited she says let's go and buy pizza it's a message is this justice to do say that she made chicken and then she made sandwiches and then then you are looking at a I can adjust estates on it but your profession is different from being a wife my husband said some of the ladies they have made themselves like another boy in the house do you understand so what are your values some of the things are not going to change that girl is telling you I don't believe that 21st century girl must cook and that choice must be shared what is that okay okay okay okay okay oh okay that is how it tastes and since this is not too late to humble yourselves and land because service is beautiful don't come with your baby or gone to the kitchen when you get home you put your gun down you put your bib down you put your wig down and you become a wife amen because service is beautiful and some of you because you don't know how to do anything you leave everything to the mate the men do come and do come and do she offer all the services and after that she astronaut of a bedroom services they say how could you abdicate that your throne you have dictated your place so even though you may be a lawyer that is where then law I am choosing them Mike the law should not get into the way of being a virtuous woman amen and I'm the first to tell you that is no easy because before I also came here to do domestic duties this is that the lady who introduced me she said in the morning when they are doing their chores I hope they were doing more than doing their choice Amen because that's also part of marriage it meant somebody so choose somebody was the same values the same you see a brother was going to marry and he was marrying somebody outside Ghana I don't have a problem with it but I said that you know marriage itself can be complex and then now you're going to marry somebody from a different culture different outlook and I asked him you you see some people are to ganon we understand so you have to be able to evaluate yourself and know that you see a member of stuff of my way she got married she was cooking for her husband she said Oh breakfast the husband's what do you have she's I have Weetabix I have this that the man said Adrienne idea and wanna let me inquire now if you are a brother like that then you come and tell me that your voice my an Irish lady then is okay it's good we are in the body of Christ we are whatever we are all good choices the way you a shinobi Cocotte requesting is your wolf is for Mom now you are going to marry somebody who will give you sandwiches are you going to prevail you see so we have to look at our values our time is not very long but I will do my best so you walk with somebody who has the same values and then also you seek counsel in the multitude of counsel the Bible sees their safety so seek godly counsel someone blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly so you need to seek counsel Naomi gave counsel to Ruth she said go to the field of Boaz and stay there and the way she came back said wash anoint yourself dress yourself but don't make yourself known to him so through that Ruth found a husband Esther was counseled by mother Chaya take part in the beauty pageant don't disclose your nationality and the way she had to go for the parade the Bible says that she was advised by the Kings Chamberlain and she just took it you know so counsel can make such a difference I don't think that I'll be my to my husband if it were not good counsel from godly people like my roommates you see because I loved him and everything but the first best one of the early people I told was a total unbeliever an auntie of mine and she said no no no the other fonti boys the other fancy boys is not watch whatever whatever but thank God I spoke to my roommate and I have no regret amen so the multitude of counsel who make a difference for you and then also we always feel that what are we going to get my just mom what you are going to give and that's one of the showcase you feel that all what a mic when I ask people would you marry a woman who can look after me a woman with tender all our reasons are selfish but it's not what the path is going to be to you is what you are going to give the Bible says husband's love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave marriage is a giving relationship and we get so discouraged because we felt that we're coming to get but if you have the mind that you're going to give and the other partner also has a mind that he's also coming to give then it brings a fulfilled relationship and then lastly I hope if I have time I'll go on but lastly first Corinthians 7 verse 28 it says among other things that they that shall marry shall have trouble in the flesh it's a professed receive it and so as I said we don't expect that the Bible says that they that shall marry shall have trouble in the flesh it didn't say that some or maybe on my church you have trouble in the flesh because for is the way you decide to marry it means that your night can be stepped Amen but you are single you sleep nobody wakes you up for anything when you get married they are intruders if you like and the Bible talks about all that area and it is an important part of marriage amen some of you in the world you have done all that robotics or the when it comes to myself headache my church they say that the women the headaches come at 8 9 o clock in the night do you see so that is even trouble in the flesh well you're not married you can decide to eat anything for Gary soaking you are sitting here after die so let me go and visit them ever whatever but when you are mighty what are we eating this afternoon so much opt be numb why it's not like that so there's trouble in the flesh you have different temperaments you are likely sometimes not to see eye to eye all that is trouble in the flesh and that is what people cannot sustain and then they just give up but a prophecy so you must go into marriage with that mind that as I'm going I'm going to have trouble trouble in the flesh there are happy times there are joyous times where there is also trouble in the flesh which Paul and told us like we will have okay so and then Paul kept saying finally finally Esther chapter 4 verse 11 when you read it Esther was saying that she has not been called by the king these thirty days you see Esther was beautiful the King had many beautiful remember he chose Esther on that day of the wedding he declared a public holiday the give drinks they said everybody you your party with twenty people you are always come to bring your card this is but this one they said the whole nation didn't have problems and the King to get to the chamber and everything but it got to a point in her life when Mordecai as therefore a favor she revealed something she said I have not been called into the king these thirty days so no matter how beautiful you no matter if they put a crown on your head no matter how much your spouse loves you there will be times when he hasn't called you for 30 days 30 days is very long but it's a shock isn't it so Esther revealed that and my point that God does not give one person to be God to you and when we are choosing spouses we think that this person is going to solve all my problems in my life be everything to me and I will have no need marriage is a fascinating thing your mother your father have given birth to you they've looked after you nicely suddenly you wake up I am going to stay with the stranger I don't know him I don't know his parents so well but I find him more than I value you mommy and daddy so I'm going it's divine amen but as you marry sometimes we put unexpected expectations on our spouses he wants him to make you happy he wants him to be responsible for your laughter you want him to be responsible for your penis you want him to be a sport and you want the woman to give you joy unlimited before you manage the air in the bedroom to do this this that you don't know that is your mind but the person is different so you I use the remote control to see what the person would be and then also ask you are marrying the we are cinder he'll be tender you'll be carried you are you are imagining on even after you have said bye-bye to you instead of meditating on Matthew 4:4 you are meditating on the words of a man amen and therefore we look for everything in one person but if you find everything one person then that person has become God and God will never like that God will always leave a place in you that is hungry God will always leave a place in you that's not fulfilled God will leave a place in you that would bring you running back to him so don't look for God in human vessels the bible says we have this treasure in earthen vessels that the excellency of his path shall be of God and not of us so there's no perfect person you are you perfect but we always look at our faults through rose-colored glasses and then the other person is for whom magnifying glasses you are this you are that you are that so we have this idealistic view of what the person is coming to do in our lives the person has just come in to complement you to be a companion but the path is also coming with her bag of problems backwards when the person is going out to do say Oh lay your troubles on my shoulders put your worries in my pocket always will not fit into his pocket and his shoulders cannot carry his own problems by what he sang today he said I should give him my worries he Jesus it's only Jesus who said casting all your cares upon me because I care for you so don't look for God in human vessels as you are choosing you may see some faults ask yourself can I live with it can I live with it because everybody has a downsize and were to somewhere too talkative some people don't budget some people overspend and sometimes it even comes to temperaments that's what brings a differences I believe that this all time will allow God bless you and lead you amen you're here this morning we have had the Word of God in succession but you don't know Jesus as your saving you are not serious in your walk with God you want to say lady Reverend this morning I want to make a commitment to God I want to give my life to Jesus I want to start all over again every head bowed and every eye closed you are here like that's this afternoon I just want you to lift up your hands and I'll pray with you wherever you are standing it's not okay to just show you that this is how to choose a life partner you need to know Jesus for yourself that is what makes the difference you want to say lady Reverend I'm not sure without go to heaven or hell when I die I am not sure about anything I want to make it right with God I want a relationship with God lift your hands high above your shoulder forget about what's on your left wrist on your right Jesus is here to meet you that afternoon I see your hands I see your hands god bless you Father thank you for these people whose hearts you have touched and if you've put up your hands just come forward to me give me the privilege of leading you to the living water give me the privilege of leading you to the one that gives life there were many more hands just come forward I want to pray with you this is about life and death this is our by eternity I'm bargaining for yourselves please come forward here and we all took this step to give our lives to Jesus you are here like there's a lady Reverend I want a new beginning I want a Newton just come forward and I'll pray with you is there anybody else coming if you've come forward just lift your hands and as I say this prayer please say it after me let it be your own prayer and mean it from your heart you want to say Lord Jesus this afternoon I come to you just as I am Lord take my life and make me a new person come into my life and be the Lord of my life thank you Jesus for coming to die on the cross to save me from sin and thank you that I will rise again in eternity because I know you Satan listen to me carefully today I am born again I break every link with you Christ has set me free and I'm free indeed thank you Jesus thank you for strength to go on thank you for a new beginning and thank you for grace to walk with you in Jesus name Amen please put your hands the happy birthday you are born again congratulations god bless you and don't go back walk with the Lord amen [Music]

Channel: Lady Rev. Adelaide Heward-Mills Official Videos

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Length: 45min 13sec (2713 seconds)

Published: Sun Jul 05 2020