How to Achieve Anything You Want in Life with Marie Forleo

[Music] - Marie welcome to the feel better live more podcast I'm so excited to be here thanks for having me on hey not at all look you have been on a grueling tour I think so far is that fair to say I would say it's intense I haven't experienced as grueling although I will admit that I was definitely nervous because I've never done this before and we did eight cities in two weeks in the States and I've been here in London for about five days now and it's been you know every day has been full of press so it's intense for sure enjoyable totally I mean this is so fun for me the idea behind the book everything is figure out Abel is something that I so believe in deeply and I'm so excited to get out to people so the actual doing of that and talking with different folks and doing podcasts like this it's such an honor and it's really really fun I think you know even this whole message that you're out on tour it's busy you're rushing around from country to country yet you still got this energy in the spark about you and I think that very much is in is in keeping with what the book is about right when you live a life of purpose actually you know you get that energy right you're not feeling as though you're doing something that someone else has asked you to do you're doing it because you love it yeah and I think you know when it comes to burnout and exhaustion so much of that isn't necessarily about the quantity of work it's about the quality of work because I think it's a lot easier to get burned out and to feel exhausted if you don't really believe in what you're doing if it's not really rooted in something you care deeply about or it's not rooted in a sense of contribution I've certainly seen that in my own life if I've been pushing myself too hard and I'm just kind of grinding through chances are I don't really believe in it as much as perhaps other things like for example this book so we're at the tour piece right now which is almost like the end of it to a certain degree because writing the book was really intense and then getting it to the final stages and then the actual launch of it you know I don't know if you know this but I had this wild idea to launch the book in a very unique way I had a dream I said imagine if a Beyonce concert and a TED talk had a baby then threw a block party and it sounded like the funnest thing ever but it was also really scary and intimidating and it took us months to pull this off and we did it back in September in New York City we had almost 2,000 people come in and I'm telling you that story because it was probably one of the most demanding things that I've done in a really long time in terms of how early I had to wake up how much I had to use my brain and my body and then keep everything else going and yeah you know I slept really good at night but I wasn't burned out because I believed in the project so much it's such a powerful message to people because a lot of the time you know it's adults where I see fatigue a lot of the time yes and you know fatigue is not always that we're doing too much it's something that we're not doing enough of the things that make us feel alive that's right and right in your introduction actually you you put a statistic there which jumped out to me when I saw it which was less than a third of us employees are actively engaged at work yes that's a trend that's continued for years now the Gallup polls show that and when you think about the economic and the spiritual and the psychological repercussions of over 70% of again Americans feeling some level of disengagement meaning dissatisfaction with how they're spending the vast majority of their waking hours it's tragic and you just think about all of the potentiality that's being missed because people aren't happy at work you know and spending eight to ten hours a day in that state chronically month after month year after year you start to understand why people are unhappy you know later in the book we talk about the fact that there's over 300 million people around the world currently that suffer from depression which is one of the leading causes of disability in the United States suicide rate sort of 30-year high so I think collectively we're in a lot of pain in different ways but I'm hopeful because I've seen throughout my own life and I've seen throughout my own work and doing what I do for the past 20 years we humans are incredibly resilient and we absolutely have the power to change these things and that's why I'm excited to talk about this idea everything is figure out a ball because I certainly don't pretend to have all the answers but I think the philosophy and the tools and the strategies that we share in the book help people find or create their yeah 100% I've got a say Murray it is a fantastic book you know if you had a look at my advance copy that I've got there scribbles on pretty much every page there are so many lot of nuggets of wisdom I think for me what I love about it as this is say I think it's a deceptively simple way work yes it's deceptively simple because it is so powerful and it works whether you want to you know change your business be more productive in business whether you want to improve your health whether you feel a little bit stuck in your life wherever it says I think that whole idea that everything is figure on scible is very very powerful it's a great it's a great saying to live your life by yes I think and I think before we dive into some of these practical tools off which there are many where does that phrase come from so we got to take it back to New Jersey to my mom who gets all the credit for this so my mom is this amazing character she's about five three she has got the tenacity of the bolt of a bulldog she looks like June Cleaver and she curses like a truck driver so she's this fantastic character and she grew up the daughter of two alcoholic parents and she really learned by necessity how to stretch a dollar bill around the block and when I was a young girl one of my fondest memories was sitting at the kitchen table with my mom on Sundays clipping out coupons because she loved to teach me all the ways that our family could save money she also taught me about the fact that brands would send you cool free things like maybe a recipe book or cooking utensils if you saved up your proofs of purchase I don't know if your family ever did that yeah back in the day back in the day that's right it's an old-school thing so one of my mom's most prized possessions was this tiny little transistor radio that she got from Tropicana orange juice for free so it was shaped like an orange had a red and white straw sticking out of the side that's the antenna and my mom's one of those humans who's always busy she's always doing something and I remember as a kid the way to find my mom somewhere around the yard or somewhere around the house was listening for the sound of that tinny little radio so one day I come home from school and I hear the radio playing off in the distance and I got closer to the house I realized the sound was coming from up above and I look up and I see my mom perched precariously on the roof of our two-story house which was frightening I was mom are you okay what are you doing up there and she yelled back she's like I'm fine no big deal the roof had a leak I called the roofer he said it was gonna be at least 500 bucks I said screw that I'm doing it myself then I come home from school another day and I hear the little radio coming from the back of the house and I walked to the back of the house and turns out my mom's in the bathroom and I push open the door and there's like dust particles in the air there's pipes sticking out of the wall it looked like an explosion went off and I was like mom are you okay what's going on she's oh oh I'm fine you know the bathroom tiles there were some cracks in it then I didn't want the bathroom to get moldy so I'm retiling the entire bathroom and you got to get my mom is high school educated and this is the 80s so this is a pre-internet pre-google pre-youtube world she could not look up tutorials on how to do this stuff so one day it was actually the fall and I was coming home late from school and it was already dark out which was eerie and I approached my house and the house is completely dark and it's silent which for an Italian American home not a good sign I walk inside and I felt that pit in my stomach that you have when you're a little kid you kind of sense something is wrong or something's off and I'm thinking to myself like where's my mom where's the sound of the radio and all of a sudden I hear these clicks and clacks coming from the kitchen and I follow that sound and I see my mom hunched over the kitchen table which looked like an operating room there was screwdrivers there was electrical tape and then in about a dozen little pieces was a completely dismantled Tropicana orange radio and I was like mom are you okay this is like your favorite thing she said I'll read no big deal she said I'm just fixing it you know the antenna was off the dial was a little broken and so I'm putting it back together and I stood there watching her work her magic for a second and I finally thought to ask the important questions which was this hey mom how do you know how to do so many different things that you've never done before but nobody's shown you how to do it and she put down her screwdriver and she cocked her head to the side and she looked at me and she said Bri what are you talking about this is no big deal nothing in life is that complicated if you roll up your sleeves you get in there and you do it everything is figure out a ball and I was like whoa like it was so just powerful and you know you have those moments in life where you hear something and everything clicks and I started repeating that phrase to myself and her and my dad really modeled throughout my childhood just that you know when there is something wrong you just dive straight in and that phrase has really been the single most powerful driving force of my entire life in my entire career when I was in high school I used it to get out of this toxic and physically abusive relationship when I was in college I used this phrase to help myself get these rare work-study positions so that I could actually pay for school I'm the first in my family to go to college then after I graduated it's helped me get every single job I've ever had from working on the floor of the New York Stock Exchange to publishing with Conde Nast to selling glow sticks at nightclubs to becoming one of the world's first elite Nike dance athletes despite having no formal dance training and then of course to building the business you know I started at 23 I didn't have investors I didn't have a clue I was full of self-doubt tons of debt and then building it into what we had today so I will say this there is not a single day that goes by that I still don't use not only that fries but the other things that we talked about in the book yeah Wow super powerful story amazing what our mothers can see just right that's right and what's coming to my mind is you tell that story is did you know then and there how powerful that phrase was or did you hear it and you thought yeah okay I kind of get that that's what it wisdom for my mum and then did you go through life not thinking about that was that was there one particular incidence where you remember thinking oh my god I get it now that's what mum was talking about I think it was a little bit of a combination I think I really like saw her doing her thing with the Tropicana orange radio and the thing that was striking to me about that particular example was again my mom is not an engineer or G just was fearless about going in so I think I got it then but throughout you know becoming young a young adult and going through college I kept revisiting that and every time I would activate that idea meeting like I'm gonna try and figure this out I'm gonna find a solution I'm gonna be creative and not stop until I find some way to resolve this I kept building up proof for myself that this was a real thing that this worked and so I think it was a little bit of a combination like a dance between forgetting it remembering it activating it and then building up this spiral of confidence as I got into adulthood yeah that makes sense doesn't it I guess it's not a straight line to sort of boring something or having an idea and actually get into where you want to get to it's always but if up and down right yeah it's funny you say we've got to go back to Jersey yes to tell the story and you know as someone growing up in the north of England my you know New Jersey always had this sort of iconic place in my mind and the reason is basically because of Bruce Springsteen and Bon Jovi yes when I was a kid playing my guitar dreaming about rock stardom those two were two artists who I listened to a lot and in their music you would always hear about New Jersey you would hear about you know we want to break out we want to go and change the world so it was I don't know I'm there's something that's connecting with me on that level because I feel that there's a real sense of limitless possibility in your book that we can all read it and go well I can take on anything yes how much do you think your New Jersey roots have played into this book well I think there's a lot of it because it is just my genuine history and there's just I think a grittiness and a groundedness to my particular family because both of them my parents didn't grow up with a lot so they're very industrious and I think you know the folks that I grew up around kind of had a lot of that same element of Kendu let's work really hard you know the work ethic thing I think is really strong in my family and a lot of the folks that I grew up around but I will tell you I always had a dream to live in New York City I remember when I was six years old I told my mom I was like I'm gonna live in New York City and particularly in the West Village like not even two blocks from where I actually live today and she looked at me she's like what are you talking about we live in New Jersey you you're not gonna go there that's crazy it's it's too dangerous blah blah and now she's like you've known ever since you were a little girl like this is where you need to be yeah it is incredible what you have achieved is simply incredible and I guess it would be good to understand at some point if you know if people are listening to this and they think maybe I get it for you it sounds that you know there is limitless you have this hugely successful business you've got your your YouTube show marietv you're inspiring you know mmm probably millions of people around the world you know I'm not like you my life isn't like that I'm stuck I don't have the same opportunity what would you say to them well a couple things one I certainly didn't wake up like this to use a Beyonce phrase you know I've been doing what I've been doing for 20 years and I started off like all of us do not having a clue feeling tremendous amounts of self-doubt when I was 23 and started my business I was piles and piles of debt and I felt honestly really just kind of embarrassed because you know in my mind I thought in order to be a successful business owner you have to have an MBA you have to have all of this kind of these advanced degrees in this pedigree in all this education and I had none of that and I had to build it from the ground up and because I was young when I started I was also really insecure around my age meaning who's gonna take me seriously you know especially in the realm and I even hate the term life coach it's really it's not for me and not that it's bad for anyone else it's just not something I identify with but in the world of supporting people I was like who the hell is gonna hire a 23 year old life coach like this sounds nuts so for anyone that's watching right now going like yeah this is okay for you but it wouldn't work for me I don't have whether it's the advantages or look like you look look like or come from where you come from there's a couple things I share in the book itself we have stories from dozens of people who I've never met from all walks of life all ages all backgrounds who have used this simple phrase everything is figure out able to create massive change in their own lives and not just on stuff that is forward moving in terms of building a business or reshaping your health or getting out of debt I mean we have stories of folks that have faced some of the hardest most difficult truths in their lives like dealing with grief and loss getting through trauma and addiction and you know I'll tell you one quick story when I first shared this idea on a platform outside of my own it was with Oprah and she had a one-day event called super soul sessions and I was one of nine speakers and so I talked about everything was figure out able for the first time and after that talk out into the interwebs universe I started getting letters from people who heard the phrase and started using it and one letter came from a woman named Jen and Jen said this Marie I really loved her Oprah talk this was an idea that my mom had been trying to teach me in fact we loved it so much we sat down and watched it together and then suddenly everything changed my beautiful mom who's like my best friend was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and suddenly nothing seemed figure out of all she said but when I took a step back and looked more deeply here's what I figured out I could figure out how to get nursing care for my mom who lived in a rural area I could figure out how to find foods that she could actually tolerate and this was the big one for Jen she said I could figure out how to get medical equipment so my mom could spend her last days and in fact her last five weeks on earth exactly where she wanted to be which was in her own home so Jen said you know I can say without a doubt that everything really is figure out able and thank you for sharing this tiny phrase that made such a big difference in these two women's lives they're from New Zealand and I share that to say that this phrase is simple but it can help us in our most challenging days and then in terms of privilege or advantage if we want to have that conversation like I'm very clear as a white woman born in the United States I have one what Warren Buffett calls the ovarian lottery meaning by no effort of my own I was born into a family and into a country that I had a roof over my head I had food on the table and I had access to education in health care which are things that millions of people still don't have access to so in that regard I understand my place in this world and here's what else is true in this book I tell stories of other humans that are far more compelling and diverse than my own so for anyone listening I would just say this to you that I respect you and I respect and appreciate our differences and while I don't know the specific details of your history or your hardship here's what I do know you as a human being your power is immense and your potential is limitless and you have what it takes within you right now to transform or transcend any challenge that you face that's my belief that's what I'm standing by that's what we talked about in the book and we have so many examples that embody that truth yeah it really is inspiring and I would absolutely echo that there are some really amazing stories in the book about people who are using this philosophy if you will want to get them through life and make significant change and you know I've been a practicing doctor now for nearly 20 years and one thing I have seen with people time and time again is when people feel that they've got no agency over what happens to them they've got no control over their illness or you know how things are going to progress in their health it's very disempowering it's very demoralizing and I found that often the best thing I can give people is to listen to them without judgment but be is to help them understand what they can't control the things that they can do and I see a real similarity in your philosophy because what you're saying I think in this book one of the clear messages is that there is no problem out there that cannot be overcome right and you're you know you very openly say at one point you know maybe I can't prove this to you with scientific papers but actually it's so beautifully written and it's this whole idea that actually but whether I can prove it to you or not here are some examples this is what I truly believe and if you don't believe me and you don't want to follow this well what kind of life do you live without this yes and I will say this so I love that you brought this up because for anyone who's skeptical or cynical first of all I welcome that because we should think critically about whatever we're consuming and whatever idea or philosophy mean we might want to experiment with you know when I was writing the book I actually went to brunch with a few friends and one of my friends brought her 10 year old son and they were asking me the Marie what are you working on next what's your next project nice I'm working on a book what's the title I said everything is figure out Abel and the ten year old said no it's not nope no it's not and I said oh this is awesome because I will meet more of this when I meet more people out in the world tell me more what's not figure out Abel and he said well we human beings can't grow working wings out of our back and fly away and I said well that may be true as of this moment in time however you know that we human beings can indeed fly and he was like oh I guess you're right he's like well I can't bring my dog back from the dead and I said well that may be true at this moment however scientists are working on cryogenics and there have been people that have been cloning their dogs and he was like oh I guess you're right so a few more conversations like that inspired me to actually create a little set of rules a mental container if you will which allows us to use this phrase and philosophy for its intended purpose which is to help us reawaken our own power and strength and agency and then use that power and strength to change our lives and create meaningful change around us so here are the three roles of the figure out abel philosophy ready yeah rule number one all problems or dreams are figure out abel rule number two if a problem isn't figure out a ball it isn't a problem it's a fact of life death gravity certain laws of nature rule number three you may not care enough to solve this particular problem or reach this particular dream and that's okay find something you do care deeply about and go back to rule number one you know when I was working on the book I loved including great inspiring quotes and I found one for a ton of instance in this book there's like 70 I think we counted and we've researched all of them you know they are they are true they are who said you know whoever we said said them actually said them and there's one from a British quantum theorists named David Deutsch he wrote this phenomenal book called the beginning of infinity it's a mind bender he has this great quote which says everything that is not forbidden by the laws of nature is achievable given the right knowledge and here's what I would say and because after having conversations about the book especially from a scientific perspective I do want to share this just because something hasn't been figured out as of now doesn't mean that intrinsically or scientifically it's not figure out about just that it hasn't been figured out yet so for example 100 years ago having a human being walk on the moon right hadn't been figured out yet fast forward to 1969 and we human beings collectively figure that out I'm sure you have tons of examples from the world of Medicine yeah lady example The Commitments endless but the one that comes to my head is I remember my parents are immigrants from India to the UK yes I remember as a kid like whatever my parents wanted to speak to their parents in Calcutta or in India it'd be this big event like you know in India they wouldn't know at what time to be at the phone box you know we would know what time we were calling ever want to be ready for this big source of weekly phone call or do weekly phone call yes and now anyone's got an iPhone and can go and FaceTime someone so even in the space of what 15 years communication has dramatically changed right right so anything that hasn't been figured out yet and that's why this becomes so fun and exciting and if we think about it even in a broader sense you know for anyone to say well no not everything is figure out about we would never have any advances in science or in medicine or the humanities or arts or sports or anything so again coming back to your point it's like you don't have to necessarily take my word for it or a quantum theorists word or anyone's word but I would invite people to try it before you deny it try it before you deny it just experiment play and see if this phrase and philosophy doesn't help you become more creative more action-oriented and find solutions to the things that are really troubling you yeah Marie I would just say to people listening whatever you're trying to achieve in your life at the moment I genuinely think that by adopting their philosophy in your book you're gonna you're gonna feel more optimistic you're gonna feel that you've got a frame what you've got you're gonna feel as though actually you can achieve it there are steps that you can take to get there that's right and it might not have it's probably not gonna happen overnight and the other thing I want to share about this idea this isn't about being a Pollyanna it's not about sugarcoating reality and it's certainly not about a quick fix that is for sure the more challenging our challenge is you know the problem is or the dream is it's gonna take time and it's gonna take hard work and you might fall on your face and you might scrape your knees we all do and that's okay but ultimately you are gonna find a way to transform or transcend any challenge you face for sure on the subjects of these amazing quotes yes and I've circled so many of them the one I thought I'd looked at to talk about is this whole idea about perfectionism yes now this is you know this is something many of us struggle from I certainly raised yeah absolutely and I'd like to say I'd like to admit that I'm I am a former perfectionist it's something I've worked really hard on to sort of you know just stamp out on me bit by bit and I feel that even this podcast I guess is was a lesson and not mean a perfectionist you know when I started it had an idea I had a concept I didn't have a logo I didn't have the proper equipment you know and it just I thought I forget if I wait for all those things to happen and have the perfect logo and everything it's never gonna get off the ground let's just start and it's exploded in popularity without even waiting for perfectionism so I think it is something that holds a loss for spot particularly in this era of social media and we can maybe touch on that why why that might be but the quotes that I love is I don't know who said it I'm sure yeah but you may remember off the top of your head but it's perfectionism is self abuse of the highest order yes I don't know but we do have it in the book and we can certainly look it up but isn't that a great quote come on I feel it right I just thought that thinking about it for a few minutes really trying to reflect on it so you do feel it why do you think perfectionism is what many of us strive for and why did you keep that quote in the book well first of all I think that many of us have high standards you know and we want to get things right I think sometimes it comes from somewhat of a good place of wanting to do our very best of wanting to put out an amazing product but I think we're you know high standards are healthy we're perfectionism is not I think it bleeds over into a form of self-abuse and and the fear that we're not good enough and that we will never be good enough and that usually is connected to some form of comparison of comparing ourselves to other people perhaps to people we admire to people that we see on social media to some ideal we also have in our head of who we should be who we think we should be the quote unquote perfect version and that's where it bleeds over into a really self-destructive and painful place you know perfectionism can keep us spinning our wheels but in the extreme versions of it it's actually tied to some pretty serious mental health issues and eating disorders there was a study done that we talked about in the book where the folks who there was a group of folks who had taken their own lives and researchers went interviewed their family and friends and over half of those interviews they described the person who is no longer with us as a perfectionist and so we know in the extreme that's where it can go and I think the fix is one to understand that you don't have to be that way forever and to it's a simple mantra that can make a huge difference and it goes like this we strive for progress not perfection you know perfection is a thing that I don't think can ever be achieved and again here's what's awesome about what we talk about in the book and what we're suggesting right now you can still have high standards you can absolutely go for excellence but when you focus on progress not perfection the quality of your work increases because you're actually producing more and the metric through which you're measuring yourself is not did I get this perfectly right is did I put something out there did I learn did I grow am i taking any step forward even if it's just a little and here's what's cool progress doesn't always look like a straight line going up sometimes when you make a flop or you fail or you fall down and scrape your knees that's also progress because there was some type of growth in there there was some opportunity to gain experience or to learn what not to do which also moves you ahead yeah I mean it's it it's got so much relevance to whatever people are trying to change yeah you know I know people do your USB school isn't says yeah cool for modern entrepreneurs who want to make money and make a difference yes yeah but the same principles what excites me is the same principles apply to any change in life rights they're not the universal truths of course especially if we think about it in terms of our health you know we don't necessarily have to eat perfectly every single day most humans can't you don't have to necessarily you know I'm a big proponent of meditation it has radically changed my life I don't meditate every single day I'm not perfect at that but I still get the benefits from it because I'm consistent enough to see it and I'm always striving for a little bit more growth and so I can be kind to myself in that respect and anything that I am looking to expand in terms of my skillset my ability to be accomplished in a certain area I am always just looking for progress not perfection even as it relates to this book you know I could hear the voice in my mind when I was first starting to craft the book and write it I was like oh this is crap no one's gonna want to read this like I could hear that perfectionist his voice why isn't it just pouring out of me and I had to keep coming back to the same mantra I used all of these tips every single day of going numerate just write this paragraph today then this is the first forgive my french but shitty first draft and it'll get better as you refine it and as you edit it and that is the truth so I think just progress not perfection if you repeat that to yourself often you will find the perfectionism melting away and find your place in a really exciting state of continual growth and expansion yeah for sure we're on the subjects of growth you talk about fixed mindset versus a growth mind your work all of it so I think mindsets when people are trying to make change mindset is clearly very important and I just wonder if you can expand a little bit on why you think it's so important to have the right mindset and if people don't have the right mindsets can they change it yeah well first of all let's just give a huge shout out to the book mindset and Carol Dweck's work and if you haven't read that I really recommend it for everyone I think it's just just such a transformative concept we mentioned that in the progress not perfection chapter because it's really good so you know a fixed mindset just for folks that aren't familiar is when you believe that whatever talents abilities strengths or skills that you were born with that's it like you've either got it or you don't and no amount of hard work no amount of effort no amount of training is gonna make you better it's just again you would either got it or you don't and it's a very toxic mindset it's a very limiting mindset you kind of operate from this place of scarcity from competition it's just a lot of toxic behavior thinking and outcomes a growth mindset on the other hand is when you understand that whatever you were born with in terms of talents give abilities or skills that's just a starting block and you can absolutely grow and improve and and become better over time through effort and through dedication and through failure so you actually embrace challenges you don't shy away from them you look for opportunities to kind of test your skills and maybe even scrape your knees because you know I'm gonna learn something and that's how I'm gonna grow so that's really kind of the core difference between a fixed mindset and a growth mindset and so I think when it comes to learning anything new or changing our lives 80 to 90 percent of the game is mindset because if you don't believe that it's possible to change you won't if you do believe that it's possible to change that's again 80 to 90% of it the mechanics of any change of regaining your health of starting a business of getting a relationship back on track of feeling better in your day to day life I don't think the how to's quite honestly are that complicated they're usually not in some rare instances absolutely yes there are some things that again as a society and collectively we still have a lot to figure out but making some profound changes in your personal life on a day to day basis we know what to do you just have to believe that it's possible and then have the follow-up and the follow-through to see it happen yeah for sure has the internet and this social media world in which we live in I wonder how much in many ways it's been empowering to see what is possible sure but I think on the flip side it's probably made things like perfectionism and the toxicity of comparison and you know talk about the specs mindset where you operate from a prevent from a place of jealousy and competition in some ways it's made it worse I think let's say you'd release this book 30 years ago pre-internet of course the tooth that tips and tools would have been just as valid I'm sure but do you think there's something incredibly powerful about it today in the 21st century in the era of Technology well every day we can see what our friends and what people around us are achieving amazing things our daily life can never ever live up to the highlights of someone else's Instagram wheel yeah well so let's talk about comparison for a moment because I think comparison is creative kryptonite you are never going to come out feeling good when you compare yourself to others it's always a losing proposition so that's one thing to recognize you know when I was in college I was a party girl and I like to party a lot and I used to go to the bar and drink this awful liqueur it was called Goldschlager it was flavored like cinnamon and it had these gold flakes inside terrible stuff and I remember just drinking way too much of it one night and just completely thrown up in the bush and the reason I say that is because you know having a Goldschlager hangover was horrible you just felt so sick for days these days people do shots of compare slogger online on their Instagram feed or floating around the internet or wherever it is that they kind of consume all of that comparison and doing shots of compare lager and then for days if not weeks they're off their game they're not really creating they're not in rooted in their own gifts and talents and the difference they want to make they're like trying to bounce off what someone else does and thinking through their own life in terms of how they're measuring up or not with people around them which again completely takes you off track so I think that it's important to recognize how you feel after you engage with your phone whether you do it through blogs social media whatever your kind of poison is that you like to go to and then I would invite people to just stop you know you don't have to pick up your phone you don't have to scroll through the social feeds and if you find yourself being lost in a comparison or hangover you have the ability to end it you really really do I would say that choose some people that really help you to feel inspired and then most importantly spend the vast majority of time creating not consuming it's actually one of the things we talked about in the book and I've shared this with people one of the best habits you can build is to create before you consume so rather than wake up in the morning and scroll your feeds or take in your email or look at the news create a stronger mind through meditation or start writing the next chapter of your book or get a workout in like create a stronger body rather than just consuming passively the work of others and if you just build that habit at anytime you're going to go to consume something is there anything you'd like to create first and if the answer is yes do that and you'll see before you know it the ratio will shift where you're creating a lot more than you're consuming and then comparison becomes a thing of the past like I'm too busy right now to be really honest with you this is something I've seen from this whole book process the periods in my career where I have either felt like crap or I've gotten a little bit off-track is probably because I wasn't busy enough and I'm spending a little bit too much time looking at what other people are doing the past I would say my goodness 18 months or so has been all so all-consuming when it comes to this book and the promotion and the Beyonce TED talk block party thing and now the tour I have no time to compare myself to others and guess what I don't I there's more than enough to go around so I bless everybody in their success but I am so fulfilled and happy because I'm doing what I'm meant to be doing and I'm not consuming the work of others yeah I guess the flipside is a budding author and they look at you yes and go wow she's doing an incredible book she's hit number one on the New York Times bestseller list she's on this global tour what is the point of me trying to write a book why and actually Marie's done it or she said everything that I would have said let's talk about that yes I think that's because I really appreciate you sharing your story I think that's amazing you are busy you're living your dream you're living your purpose right yeah but what about the person who's watching you who isn't and they're getting fatigued by and it's actually putting them off yeah absolute the only way that I got here was because I've worked my butt off on creating for the last two decades so I absolutely first of all I'm a lifelong learner so I'm always reading books and I am consuming things but I've more recently gotten the ratio right does that make sense so that you will have more creation than there is consumption and then you don't feel that comparison nearly as much you just get inspired by people which further fuels your your work so it's a healthy cycle so that's number one number two whenever anyone says like what do I have to offer everything's been said before everything's been done before all of these other people who are so much more experienced or accomplished they've already got it in the back there's no room for me here's what I would say to you think back to Oprah in her early days what if she said to herself you know this Phil Donahue guy who's got all these talk shows he's really gotta cover there's really no room for me there's no why should I do this he's already done it all or think about let's say Beyonce right can you imagine her just going and looking out in the music landscape and going you know what there's already enough pop stars there's just all the world ever needs why am I gonna sing my songs and dance my dances and add my voice to it it's all been done before I think about this in a really small and acute way so I love eggplant parmesan and I have a particular restaurant in New York City it's a tiny mom-and-pop kind of shop it's called pepid or so and I often think about like can you imagine when whoever started Pepito so they started it and they were kind of unsure they said you know it's New York City there's enough Italian restaurants there's more than enough eggplant parm we don't need to add our eggplant parm to the mix I would have missed out on so much eggplant parm goodness if they didn't add their voice and their creation to it and what people don't realize is that when you have a dream or a gift a product a service a message that you want to create and share with others if you don't actually bring that thing to life and do everything in your power to share it you are stealing from those who need you most why because there never has been and there never will be another you your genius is unique and your DNA is unrepeatable and if you don't do everything you can to follow those dreams and to share your gifts with others the world will have lost something truly irreplaceable which is you yeah I mean it's such a powerful message Marie and I really hope people are listening to that and because I do know a lot of people feel that way I've probably felt that way at various times my wife absolutely can I share one more thing about this and it's a quick story so on this lines of it's all been said or done before I remember when Josh and I first got together first of all I used to eat like crap you know I was just I was working all of these part-time jobs as bartending waiting tables teaching trying to get my coaching practice off the ground and Josh would go away to work on a television or film and he would come back to our apartment and my trashcan would be filled with like empty cans of you know macaroni and cheese and Chef Boyardee and you know potato bag chips and you know all this kind of crap and he's like Marie you know we should start juicing and he'd try and turn me on to all these supplements and how about more vegetables and I was like whatever man you know I don't have time for that it's too expensive it's too gross like I was just making all the excuses so cut to a few years later I met who is now my best friend in the whole world a woman named Chris Carr she's an amazing wellness icon she's a cancer thriver she has all these New York Times bestselling books and anyway when Chris and I became friends she started introducing me to cream juice and to all of these supplements and she gave me all these recipes for smoothies yadda yadda yadda so one day I come home and I tell Josh I'm like hey Josh I'm like you should see all these supplements that my new friend just recommended she wrote all these New York Times bestsellers and here's the juicer we should get and here's the salads we should start making like we should have done this years ago understandably Josh had a facepalm moment he's like what are you talking about I've been trying to tell you the same exact thing for years but here's the point no matter how many times something has been said or done before sometimes it takes that one person in their voice at the right time for it to actually make a difference and you who's listening right now you are that someone for someone out there so it doesn't matter how many times things have been said before the world needs your voice yeah I love that and you know there's seven billion people at least in the world and many growing every day and growing ends you know we're clearly many of us are in need of help in a whole variety of different ways whether it's work whether it's health so our voice is important to someone that's right and unless you put it out there you're never gonna find out who needs to hear that message to in many ways you're almost saying I don't want to put words in your mouth but I guess in many ways it's an obligation on us in some ways to make a difference yeah for Sean who doesn't want that right 100% you just said in that story that you were talking about you and Josh in in the early days you said you were making excuses yes and you have dedicated a whole chapter to excuses and I really like it and what I think that does well frankly what I think the whole book does is it helps us all reframe the stories we tell ourselves okay and I'm not saying this with any judgement I also tell myself a lot of stories yeah and I do too you know if asked Youmans we have to we I guess the question is what story do you want to tell yourself is the story you're telling yourself gonna get you to where you want to get to and so I won't if we could dive into that excuses chapter yes and talk about stories I took what excuses and how we can reframe them yeah 100% so from the onset I think the eliminate excuses chapter is is one of my favorites it's one of the most powerful because there's so much freedom that is in that chapter so all of us make excuses I make excuses you make excuses everyone listening makes excuses from time to time so this is nothing to feel bad about this is not about berating ourselves there's no need to feel shame it's just how it is now the way to break free from excuses in the best way that I found is to get really clear on two little words that can make a profound difference it's understanding the distinction between can't and won't can't and well so so many of us again I will raise my hand to this have said something like this throughout the course of our lives you know I would really love to get stronger again and really get back to the gym and really use my body but I can't because I'm too busy with work of the kids or I would really love to take that design class I think you could open up a whole new career but I can't take it it's too expensive can't afford it or you know I would really love to start that new nonprofit project I have all of these ideas for how to make a difference but I can't get started because I don't know how have you ever said anything like that yourself a version of that I certainly have but here's what's true 99% of the time not a hundred but 99% of the time when we human being say that we can't do something can't is a euphemism for won't and what is won't mean won't means that we don't really want to that we don't want to work that hard we don't want to make the sacrifice we don't want to be inconvenience twe don't want to take the risk or we don't want to move around our other priorities in order to slot this thing in and for anyone who might be resistant in saying wait you don't know me you don't know my life I'd say just hang on for a second if you consider how this idea might be true even just a portion of the time I promise you'll break free from so much of self-deceptive crap that can hold all of us back and I would invite people to ask yourself has there ever been a time in your life when initially you said oh I can't because I don't have the money or I can't because I don't have the time or I don't have the resources to do something then you came across an opportunity or a situation that was so important to you that you busted right through your excuses and you found that money or you found that time or you moved heaven and earth and you made something happen that initially seems so far beyond your capabilities have you ever done that 100 me to so many times so that is proof positive for ourselves that it really most the time isn't can its won't and here's why the distinction and the use of language is so important because when we humans use the word can't we start to feel powerless and helpless as though our life is not our choice how we're spending our time how we're spending our energy it's as though we're victims and that is not a beautiful or powerful place to create change from it's almost impossible learned helplessness right we know this from psychology on the other side when we use the word won't or we just say you know what I don't want that right now that's not my priority I'm not willing to work that hard for this I don't want this bad enough when we just say that truth even to ourselves we feel empowered we feel at choice we feel like we have agency that we're in charge of how we're spending our time our energy and our money and from that place all miracles are possible so I would invite anyone listening if you want to play with this idea for yourself the next time you catch yourself saying or thinking I can't because I don't have the time or the money or the whatever try replacing it with won't or I don't want to and see if that feels more true and in that space there's a lot of miracles that can happen yeah for sure and I really want to echo that the language we use to describe our life to describe various situations is so so important you know a very subtle shift like you just mentioned can bring it a completely different meaning and actually the language we use day in and day out that sort of permeates into our brain and our being in a and how we define ourselves comes from that language that's right and I just want to give people an example again because if anyone is skeptical they're like what are you talking about let me tell you guys this so I know in my lifetime if God willing I am on the planet long enough I have a goal of speaking fluent Italian I think the language is beautiful you know I visit the country often but I don't speak it and I know that at this stage and season of my life it's not that important to me so it's not that I can't learn Italian because I'm so busy on book tour or I'm so busy with my business that's not the truth the truth is I don't want it bad enough you know how I know that because after I get done doing my work for the day even if I've had a 10 or 12 hour day and I have let's say a half-hour left sometimes you know what I do with that half hour I sit with Josh and I watch a fun show on Netflix or I read a book or I play with my dog I'm not actually picking up my phone and learning new phrases in Italian because it's not that important to me right now and I'm not beating myself up about that but it gives me massive freedom so I don't have a conversation in my own mind going oh you really could be learning Italian but you can't because you don't have to time that's I don't want it bad enough everything I do want bad enough I'm actively working on yeah I think that's a great message isn't it for people that's like yeah what have you said in your own life that you want to change do you really want to change that is it really a priority for you at this moment in time maybe it is maybe it isn't it's and using I can't I won't you know or these sort of the little tips to make you feel maybe differently but maybe actually you know what you're a busy mom at the moment and you've got two kids to bring up and that's your arity yeah it should be and then you can release the guilt not to cut you off but you can release that feeling that you're not winning at life because guess what you are winning at life and you're being the best mom possible and if you can find that self compassion for yourself ironically more energy and time and freedom opens up and who knows what's possible from there yeah and just to echo your previous point when you're feeling like that and you are busy and you're doing an amazing job bringing up your children that's right sometimes actually the whole social media comparison trap can be even more problematic than because you're comparing you know what do they say you're comparing your sort of page one to someone else's final chapter you know your a different point in your life and it's not fair on yourself to compare yourself with other people who want a different journey everyone's on a different journey every single person every single person on this earth is on their own unique adventure and again catch it the moment you compare you lose the moment you compare you lose so as much as possible enjoy your own life and bless other people wherever they're at honor their success their challenges be there be there with compassion but most importantly stay rooted in your own path yeah remember you mentioned there there are 70 brilliant quotes in your book I've got to say you're Kuwait that I'm going to be posting and attributing to you as comparison is creative kryptonite yeah love it it just speaks to me on so many levels that you probably won't even realize because it has been you know there are just so many things I can relate that to at various points in my life so thank you for that I think it's amazing phrase and really often say that authors write the books that they need to write for themselves oh yeah I know what I sort of I want to just push a little bit on this and see you've obviously had a lot of experiences in your life you've applied these principles that you're now teaching the rest of the world through the book on yourself which is you know you've shared ups and downs in your life which is I think it's great because it's it sort of takes away that I'm feeling what people think Oh Maurice got it all figured out as you were writing it with all your knowledge and I appreciate you've interview some of the most successful and influential people on the planet on marietv as you were writing it I don't know have you started to apply any of the tools you know have you started to look at any other tools in a fresh way and start to apply them in your own life in a way that you possibly weren't doing before you sat down to write a book well here's what's awesome about this book is that I feel like any big project is there to teach you a lesson so I kind of had this intuitive sense I was like oh I know there's gonna be a tough one you know I've been teaching about business for ten years I started off teaching only about personal development and when you write a book about a big idea especially a big simple idea we talked about that the phrase is very simple right but simple doesn't necessarily mean easy and so for me part of the challenge was actually figuring out what to put in what not to put in and how to communicate what is not a linear journey in a way that it was comprehensible and that made sense especially to people who have never been familiar with my work so I struggled a lot there was so much fear and self-doubt and crying in the corner and I thought isn't this awesome I wonder % believe that everything is figure out Abel I know that my bones to be true yet I am having trouble figuring out how to write the book everything is figure out a ball so there were all of these metal lessons am I good enough to write this do I even know what I'm doing is anyone gonna even want to hear this haven't they all heard this before so every single thing that I write about I was also having that experience simultaneously does that make sense understand so the book was like kicking my butt which was it made me laugh and cry at the same time because I'm like this is actually quite perfect and it's almost like a magnifying glass anything you think you figured out it's like hold on we're gonna ramp this up now we really figured it out yes but but here's what I love about this this is an ongoing practice so in my position you know I am no sage from the stage I'm a guide on the side everything that we talked about in the book I use every single day so I still practice progress not perfection I'm still starting before I'm ready I am still figuring things out day in and day out so for me this is a very active living practice that I will tell you I'll be doing all of this stuff until my last day on earth for sure and when you decide actually there is the time in your life to learn Italian yes at some point no doubt you will sorry you're gonna have to use these principles right that's right they always it's like a circular beautiful process that keeps coming up anytime you grow and embrace a new adventure two big themes in your book for me or these sort of I think if you'd call them rules on up but these two sort of things you keep talking about our one you are not a failure and two you are not broken yes I think it's such powerful messaging for people I see this in my clinic as a doctor all the time you know people may often not say that but they often feel like that and it's often it often keeps them locked in a cycle where they can't change because they don't believe actually that they deserve change or that actually change is available to them so why is it you're so passionate about these two ideas because I think they're incredibly transformative on a really fundamental level so if you're working from the perspective that you are broken and that something is wrong with you and it will always be wrong for you it's a little bit like falling into that fixed mindset as though whatever you are born with or whatever is happening right now is static unchangeable there's no possibility then we start to slip into helplessness and hopelessness then that becomes a cycle of feeling really sad possibly depressed and there's all kinds of outcomes negative outcomes that we don't want to see happening from that whole strain of emotional being and thinking and believing on the flip side if you start to experiment with the idea that perhaps there's nothing broken with you maybe there's just some ideas or habits that you have that are simply unhelpful and that no one has ever shown you another possibility all of a sudden things brighten up and you're like oh it could that be true your mind starts to open up to new possibilities to think in new ways you get curious you may want to learn you may want to start experimenting that starts to feel hopeful and creative and exciting and again from that state I think everything can change I remember someone who works on my team a woman named Chelsea and and she's just miraculous I had talked about this idea you know that you are not broken in an earlier program that I did and she listened to the audio and she said Marie I had to tell you I listened to that in the car and I had to pull over it was so moving it changed everything for me and I don't know if it wasn't for Chelsea really highlighting that and a piece of my earlier work that it would have made it in this book and I'm really happy that it did because it's been something a number of people have commented on and I think it's true it's like look our educational system doesn't teach us currently how to harness the power of our thoughts and our beliefs and the wisdom in our bodies in order to live lives that are filled with joy and fulfillment and meaning right I didn't learn that in grammar school I didn't learn that in high school I didn't learn it in college that's the whole reason that I do what I do because when I started understanding all of these tools and principles I was like whoa why are we not teaching this Wyatt why did it take me until my 20s to start even exploring these things so I don't think any of us are broken I just think some of us haven't been exposed to ideas and tools and concepts that can help us live the lives that we want to leave ya for showing you you you tell that story and I'm I mean they were thinking about my own children because I I think the thing that worries me about schooling in the education system these days still as I don't think schools are teaching kids these kind of tools and I think they're the most important tools arguably yes to lead that sort of happy productive fulfilled life that ultimately is what I think we're all after yeah and I think also to empower ourselves and our kids with the tools to deal with challenge and adversity yeah to help them because they're gonna run into walls they're gonna run into difficult people they're gonna fail they're gonna fall on their faces so that is a guarantee for all of us humans so let's empower them with the tools and the mindsets and the healthy perspectives to grow from those experiences rather than shrink from them yeah 100% I think I think on that note I think your philosophy has merit not just for adults trying to make changes but also for children and these are a lot of the themes and there are the themes I'm actively trying to teach my kids all the time very young my mitosis seems to have this real knack well I guess I've ingrained in her so it's no surprise when she pulls it back onto me and I think a couple of weeks ago I thought what it was but I said ah darling I can't do that now I need to go and do this and she said daddy you don't need to do that do you you choosing to do it wisdom yeah nobody thought initially I was like yeah you're right actually I was super tough I was really pleased I thought okay cool she's only six yes I hope that she can maintain that yes and I do that I think a lot about language as we've already touched on it and that is so powerful the way we describe things and I don't really think until the last few years I've really had any idea just powerful it says yeah you mentioned what the only given is that we're all gonna have adversity yes okay and in many ways that is how many many of us talk about adversity in the term many of us talk about adversity and call these adverse events mistakes hmm right we say oh I made a mistake you have a very very interesting perspective on mistakes in the book and I wonder if you could share your thoughts on mistakes oh you're talking about the story when I was interviewed and asked you know about my mistakes and my failures and how I froze like a deer in headlights is that the one I don't recall that one but just generally how you reframe mistakes you know mistakes aren't things that we've got wrong necessarily there're they're a tool for learning well for sure so there's two things I'll say on that quickly I remember I was being interviewed and the interviewer asked me okay some rates didn't tell me about your biggest failures like I want to hear about your biggest flops and your biggest mistakes and I literally sat there like a deer in headlights like and I am rarely at a loss for words right and I remember leaving that interview feeling like such crap I'm like oh my god I must sound like the biggest idiot because I make flops and failures and mistakes all the time why couldn't I pull up an example and this is what I realized in my early 20s I had learned this phrase I win or I learn but I never lose and I loved it I latched on to it I adopted it I made it my own and for me there are no such thing as mistakes because I win or I learn I don't lose so any place where it's like okay you know I probably did maybe waste a little money or some time or I had a shitty judgment call ultimately if I extract some type of growth for that it was a learning opportunity and I know that may sound like so Pollyanna it's actually the truth every single time in the business when something goes wrong we do a post-mortem and we're like okay what can we learn from this how can we use this to help us not make that quote/unquote mistake again and I think in terms of progress not perfection going back to that theme mistakes are kind of a part of the journey we have this idea that progress is like almost like a straight line like okay we start at the bottom and then we inch up we inch up we inch up we inch up we end chopped and we eventually reach our goal that's not how it works you start at the bottom then maybe you take a step back and then you swirl around and go in a circle for a minute and then maybe you inch up and then you inch down and then it's just this squiggly line and quote-unquote mistakes are a natural part of that it's just a part of the learning journey yeah for sure super super powerful for people I think because I think mistakes often put us off they make us feel like you know we're not good enough and we can't make progress Murray I wonder you should have so many stories in your book about people who are not like you who have overcome obstacles and used your philosophy that everything is figure out for they've used that to get through their life and actually break through barriers are there any particular ones that you'd like to share with my audience that come to mind it's a sort of you know display and kind of bring to life some of the concepts that we've been talking about yeah so there's stories from actually two different camps of people there are readers of mine who have actually used the phrase everything is figure out able to create massive change in their life and then I tell stories of other humans who simply embody that belief like they have not read the book I've never met them some of them are you know famous and known and some of them are not but they should be I think one of my other favorite quotes that is stories actually from readers is a woman from Europe actually she's here and she's from the Netherlands and she wrote to me and told the story of just being in a really tough place in her life where she had lost her father as well she had lost her job and she found herself in this space where she felt like she had nothing she was in piles and piles of debt she didn't have work and she actually started drinking and and abusing drugs and just finding herself day in and day out just watching television and drinking more wine and just in a just a horrible cycle like so many of us can find ourselves in then she stumbled upon marietv she heard me talk about this idea that everything is figure out Abel and she started saying it to herself and started saying it to herself and it didn't happen overnight but she started to not drink the wine and then she started to put on her running shoes and then she started to take runs around the block and then she started to eat more healthy and within the span of about a year and a half she completely moved through her addiction her health completely transformed she got a new job she's actually doing the thing that she most wants to do in the world and that one really inspires me because she was in a really dark place which again so many of us will find ourselves in at various points in our life and the fact that a simple little phrase could help her reconnect to her strengths and reconnect to her own ability to turn this around including grief including addiction including all the things that can be so difficult to make it through she really inspires me yeah and I just give her so much credit and I thank her for sharing that story yeah absolutely and thank you for sharing that that is super inspiring to hear it's you know the things she's talking about at the moment make me think of that book that I've been spending a lot of time with over the last few months Ryan holidays book the obstacle is the way yes which I love and that's I also that phrase the obstacles await I use a lot in my own life when something seems like a struggle or something you know if you also say you can't smell something it's like oh this is teaching you something and as you say early on in your book and earlier on in this interview you know what can I learn from this it's such a it's a subtle reframe but it's so powerful whenever we look at all these obstacles in our life and think well what can I learn from this as you say in your business if something happens that you guys don't want to happen you know you do it post what you figure out what's the learning from it and it's it's really in keeping with the theme in your book right these are these are as I say Universal themes that can help all of us no matter what we want to do in our life and Marie you've shared lots of brilliant tips in this book there are so many more in the book well I think I just want to cover before we wrap up is if people feel inspired listening to you and they think yeah okay right that's it I've got it everything is figure out ball I'm gonna start making those small changes I'm not gonna compare right I'm gonna I'm gonna throw perfectionism out the bedroom window I want to get on with you know progress and focus every day on progress what if the people around them their partners their family their parents their friends don't believe in them what if actually they now feel inspired to make this change but they don't have a supportive community around them have you got any tips you can share for them if they find themselves in that situation yes so you've got to build what I call your figure out able forcefield which is a little bit of a community around you and all it takes is just one person to start so it's not like you have to go like oh my goodness I need to gather 15 people in order to have a figure out of a force field no just one is enough and one of the best ways to start to build your figure out able force field is to actually share this philosophy and these ideas with someone that you care about someone that you think could be a good running buddy if we call it that way and by the way you don't ask them for support on your dreams you support them on theirs and who knows the first person that you might choose to be kind of like your figure honorable friend may not be the right fit so don't give up you know you just try someone else try someone else until you find at least one person that also is open to this idea and you can support each other you know in my life right now honestly my team everyone that I work with they live and breathe this philosophy Josh my dear friends anytime one of us finds ourselves a little bit in the corner and going like okay I know this is figure out a bowl but I'm not quite sure what to do next we support each other you know say okay great let's brainstorm this or just have a listen you know sometimes when you listen to a friend and just give them the space to say their piece lots of solutions come so I would say do anything you can to find that one person and sometimes you can find a friend online I've met some of my dearest friends in the world through online connections and DMS and emails and you know with people that we don't even live in the same geographical location but you find a kindred spirit and that's all you need and then once you have one maybe you can build to and build three and built four because I think well everything a book is absolutely applicable to you as an individual it becomes exponentially more powerful when you apply it collectively when you have people around you and so that in and of itself is figure out a ball so if you're like I don't have anyone near me that's okay you just don't have anyone that you can play with yet why et such a powerful word it's not permanent just yet and so make that your first challenge to figure out yeah incredible and one of the reasons I I set up recently a Facebook community actually it's because a lot of people are saying to me look I love the podcast wrong and I love your books but I I don't have you know people around me aren't into the same kind of stuff and I'm not saying it's perfect but at least you know online can be very powerful right it's not it's not about just criticizing online and saying it's causing all these problems we can meet people and connect with people and find other candid spirits online in a way that frankly we could never have done in the era when your mum was actually using her radio right she could never have done that that's right yeah so that's super empowering Marie to sort of finally closest interview off one question there is a burning question inside me is throwing marietv you have interviewed and had conversations with some of us incredible people on the planets that must feel slightly bizarre on one level I guess you must pinch yourself sometimes it's super fun I love talking this smart amazing creative yeah exactly you know I'm in a year and a half into my podcast but the one of the great things about is you get to talk to and get to know really amazing people from all around the world but I'm interested in all those interviews that you have done are there common themes that come up from a whole variety of different people and different industry doing different things are there some common themes that you have learned that all of these different influential people are doing or sort of principles that they are applying in their own lives I think one is that they believe that they can make a difference meaning that their contribution their voice their ideas their product their service whatever it is that they're up to they actually believe in it like they believe it has merit and value and that it could actually make a difference and I've seen that to be true across the board so again it could be an author it could be a scientist it could be someone who started some kind of business or a creative in any sense there's something in them that believes that they have value and that that value is worthy of sharing yeah which again is incomplete keeping with the book right there what they wanting to share what they wants to change that problem that they're trying to solve in the world is figure out a ball I think it's a really nice nice bit of harmony there in terms of your message and what the lessons are that you've learned on marietv Maria I always like to finish off the podcasts by leaving the listeners with some actionable tips things that they can apply in their own life immediately to improve the way that they feel this is why this podcast is called feel better live more yeah I think your book absolutely echoes that although it's not you know conventionally a health book I think the principles are absolutely applicable to people who want to make health change in their life so thank you for watching a brilliant book but I wonder could you leave my listeners with some practical tips that they can think about applying in their own life immediately this is the one thing that I would invite everyone to do and it's so simple say the words everything is figure out a bull out loud as often as you can so say it when you wake up in the morning or when you're taking a shower say it kind of you know went over a lunch time or if you're taking a walk around the block say it before you go to bed at night but you have to say it out loud first of all we know this from science when you actually use your voice to say something out loud it helps you remember it and helps you create new neural pathways in your mind far greater than just thinking something in your head so the more modalities you can use like your voice it's gonna help you really embed it but here's why this is so important because when you embed this belief everything is figure out able into your brain it starts to become your default response especially when the shitake hits the fan it will train your brain to think more creatively and more with more innovation and more resilience and you'll focus on solutions rather than problems and here's why it's so important to say this to yourself as often as possible because here's what I believe the most important words in the universe are the words that you say to yourself lovely really inspiring Marie I know you're on a busy store and you've got an incredibly popular events and I think 1800 people come to see you live in London tonight so I hope the lucky ones who would go and get to enjoy the event tonight thank you really appreciate you sharing time I really appreciate it right is such an amazing book that's gonna help so many if people want to connect with you online where is the best place that they can find you so Marie Forleo ma RI e fo r le o comm is where we have hundreds of free marietv episodes the marie forleo podcast it's at marie forleo on social channels i'm having the most fun on instagram right now and then everything is figure out it will calm we've got some extra resources that just didn't make their way into the book so if you'd like to access some of those they're free as well you can go to everything as figure out of allcom Marie thank you for joining me today and maybe we'll repeat this at some point in the future absolutely was an honor thanks for having me on no worries you

Channel: Dr Rangan Chatterjee

Views: 21,315

Rating: 4.9051723 out of 5

Keywords: The Four Pillar Plan, Whole 30, NHS, GP, Progressive Medicine, Type 2 Diabetes, Low Carb, Four Pillar Plan

Id: ptleEq14V-Q

Length: 71min 49sec (4309 seconds)

Published: Wed Dec 04 2019