How I Overcame Depression & Anxiety | In-Depth Guide To Healing

[Music] hi there I'm a Mangel and this is kind of a special video for me it's one that I've been wanting to do for a long time actually a year now it just feels like the right moment to finally sit down and just do it I'm gonna share with you my mental health journey and how I managed to overcome depression and anxiety and like generalized anxiety disorder JD and all that I'm not a doctor I'm not a medical professional I'm not a guru or any sort I'm a person who went through an experience and I remember when I was going through what I went through looking for sources of information for help guidance just reassurance because the people in my circle didn't understand what was happening to me I didn't understand what was happening to me and I was sure I was going crazy I was sure I had cancer I was sure something was wrong with me physically but it was really a mental health issue I found maybe one or two videos on YouTube of people sharing their experience and giving advice they didn't really go in depth so I thought and I know that there are so many people going through this all the time every day and maybe me sharing my experience and giving tips and explaining what I did exactly what I did that helps me get over all of this maybe it'll help you I don't know or someone you know so I'm just sharing my experience I don't know if it'll work for you this is what worked for me so before I share my advice with you if you are going through this right now I want to tell you you are not alone so many people are experiencing this at the same time as you I took a little bit of comfort in knowing that that I was not alone I was not crazy that this was something real what you're experiencing cannot kill you anxiety cannot kill you how you behave from the anxiety may be harmful you know if you make a crazy decision or you do something dramatic and drastic to get over it that's where the harm comes but what you're experiencing will not kill you it feels like death but it's not your thoughts are just thoughts and the feelings are terrifying and uncomfortable but ultimately they cannot hurt you if you do not choose to act upon so let me give you a little bit of background on my story and what happened to me warning if you are going through this this might be triggering I remember I couldn't even talk about this when I was was still healing because just the thought of what happened to me and what I was experiencing would trigger panic attacks so trigger warning I've battled with depression most of my childhood between hood adolescent life so I'll very familiar with depression but in September of 2017 I experienced anxiety it came out of nowhere it was intense and crazy and I was convinced it was a physical ailment that I had cancer because the symptoms would come out of nowhere like I would be sitting on my couch I'd be in the kitchen and it would get progressively worse and worse I couldn't leave the house at a certain point after a few weeks without getting panic attacks I couldn't go to the grocery store I remember once going to the mall to get medicine or some natural remedies and having a major panic attack on the floor I couldn't breathe in hysteria crying with my boyfriend at the time and we rushed to the hospital they checked me and they said that you're physically fine there's nothing wrong with you so see a therapist there might be something wrong mentally emotionally I made an appointment with a psychologist reluctantly because I was convinced now they they didn't find it like in Grey's Anatomy or a dr. house you know I need someone who's really gonna find the little thing that's inside of me that's causing all of my symptoms symptoms by the way were heart palpitations major heart palpitations nausea stomach pain diarrhea loss of appetite I went from like eating an emotional eater who eats a lot to not wanting a thing all day I couldn't even think about food and made me nauseous tingling in my hands and my feet dizziness oh my god I would just get dizzy spells I was extremely sensitive to sound and movement you know I couldn't watch TV anymore it was too much I couldn't move around too much I felt like the world was just too chaotic everything was so loud everything was so noisy everything was intense and overwhelming music would make me cry like I would hear a song and if it had sad lyrics I would burst since it's years I lost interest in everything that I used to that I used to like to do and of course the pure sense of fear and dread you feel like you're dying you feel like you were dying it's hard to explain it's just fear the worst part was the trouble breathing it was the scariest thing for me and I later on found out that it's actually hyperventilation you're super aware of your breathing so you're actually taking in too much air so it feels like you're not ever taking in a full breath but it's really because your body's like I've got enough air what why are you giving me so much more but the sensation is like you're not getting in the enough air after a month of trying to figure out what was wrong with me especially physically I was in such a bad place like low scared terrible luckily my loving family my parents told me come home and we don't know what's going on but we'll figure it out together I live in Montreal and they live in Maryland USA so I went to stay with them and I stayed there for three months as it got worse and worse some of the symptoms were really alarming like I felt like I was going crazy like I was going mentally insane I felt like I was possessed I was like maybe I'm possessed by some demon or something and then the loss of sense of reality starts to kick in at some point and that was terrifying if you're at this stage you know what I'm talking about you you don't know what's real anymore you don't feel like you've got a grasp on reality everything it's like your perspective really is wobbly itching it's like okay it's hard to explain it really just feels like you're out of touch with reality and you're terrified that you're out of control and you might hurt somebody you love you know like I was in the kitchen I would be you know cooking and I was scared to even hold a knife all of these terrifying images would pop into my head and I was I was just terrified fear had taken over and just a note on the going crazy I want to let you know that I looked into it and apparently there's nothing more sane than to feel like you're going crazy to notice that you are insane to examine your sanity it's just a symptom of extended exposure to severe stress and anxiety apparently that's what I read it's true as I got better that was one of the first symptoms to disappear that strange crazy feeling I became agoraphobic I was afraid to leave the house I was afraid to see people I was just afraid like I said anxiety it was just pure fear I don't know if you can relate to what I'm saying and if you can let me share with you what I've learned and what helped me after seeing a doctor make sure you rule out that there's nothing physically wrong with you if you don't have any physical ailments all of these symptoms are the result of extended exposure to stress and anxiety ruled by the thoughts in your head the way I came to understand what happened to me and I could be wrong like I said I'm not a doctor but this is what made the most sense I experienced a mental break an emotional mental break and like you break a leg if you try to walk on it it's gonna hurt but it takes time to heal and eventually you can use your leg again so for me that's how I understood what happened to me it was an emotional break and I needed time for those symptoms to go away I needed to no longer be exposed to the stressors and those stressors are thoughts the thoughts in my head were attacking me so what happens when you break a leg you go to the hospital you get surgery you make sure to not put any pressure on it you give it time and it heals over time you do some rehabilitation exercises and if you're good and diligent and lucky you'll get back to normal and of course recovery time varies from person to person for me this experience was the same I had to do some emotional operations remove the stressors do rehabilitation exercises and over time I healed it almost feels like what happens to me was inevitable because I had accumulated years of insecurities of doubts of self-loathing so many negative thoughts they would just rule my day to day so much so that I didn't even notice anymore that I was just always bullying myself I even there like anger problems and all of this negative thinking and basically in September of 2017 there was an event in my life a very emotional intensive vent in my personal life that triggered a break kind of like if you stack bricks on top of your leg you just need that there's comes a point where that one more brick will break your leg and that's what happened I had one more negative brick added to my subconscious and it broke my brain so that's what happened and every time I would have a negative thought even the slightest negative thought it would trigger a fight-or-flight response in my body my body was like in survival mode every time I couldn't handle the slightest emotion if I would laugh too hard it would trigger so I hope maybe this information already helps you to understand what might be happening to you maybe at some point you experienced overwhelming emotions you've accumulated years of small emotional traumas well I'm here to tell you that you can heal I'm not a superhuman I'm not exceptional in any way so I want to believe that if I could heal and I could get through this you can too but you have to believe it it starts there you have to believe it so my advice here's what I did first get into a safe space I was very fortunate to have my parents home in Maryland to disconnect it is crucial that you take this time to recover in a space that is safe in an environment that is safe around people that care about you you really have to treat this like you are a patient who broke part of your body and our brain is like one of our most important if not the most important organ in our body so you really have to take care of it I know this can be tough and complicated but we're talking about your health here and your future so it's it's crucial try to take a month like off of work and rest you need to rest because the work you're about to do is gonna demand a lot of you your time and your effort but you can do it because you've already done one of the hardest things ever and it's to survive up until now you've been experiencing something that is so terrible a lot of people most people don't understand how easy it could be to end it all but you didn't so you can do it you can get through this number two emotional surgery I had to do it dig into your past I went through my childhood I examined my behaviors I confronted my demons I face the truth about myself things I wasn't proud of things I was ashamed of things that hurt me acknowledging all those things analyzing those things maybe do it with a therapist if you need like somebody to guide you through this process there was a lot of crying in this process obviously and you may even have to pull an e on LA and confront slash talk to the people that have hurt you that have had an impact in your life or contributed to a certain emotional trauma in your life it's one of the best and fastest ways to get rid of those emotions so you get closure and learn to forgive that's the important part to replace that negativity with positivity move past it and close the door forever tip 3 accept the past for what it is and especially accept the present where you are you have to accept that this is happening to me because my tendency was to fight this presence to fight what was happening to me constantly wishing that it wasn't happening constantly wishing I was in a future where I was healed constantly you know trouble then angry and frustrated and afraid because I was going through something I did not want to experience but that negative emotion that tension from not accepting that girl you're going through this it contributes to the situation's at the condition and it slows down your healing process observe it observe what's happening to you and I saw that by observing and accepting it it would dissipate you know like if you're in a there's a cloud or fog or something smoke coming your way you know if you start flailing around how you're gonna spread that smoke everywhere now but if you stand still and just like hold your breath I guess it'll pass number four forgive yourself and forgive others I had to forgive myself for the wrongs I had committed I had to find it in my heart to forgive those who had wronged me free myself of all those burdens those grudges number five and I'm a writer so for me this was crucial and very very helpful journaling I wrote I wrote I wrote I wrote hours on and writing getting all the bad thoughts out but if you're not a journal or maybe record some voice notes you know it's about getting the thoughts out of your head talk to a counselor sit in a tub and speak out loud for hours you know like in Harry Potter when they had that wand and they tapped it on the head and then they put it in that bowl that's what you're trying to do here basically you have to get rid of the bad energy to make space for good energy number six which really helped were breathing exercises I used the headspace app which really helped me breathe and meditate I also discovered the wim HOF breathing method and it's pretty intense I couldn't couldn't do that for more than what a few times but breathing exercises are important especially if you like me are afraid of the trouble breathing symptom breathing from your stomach that's where you have to breathe not from your lungs but pushing air into your stomach pushing your stomach out slowly letting that air out pushing breathing into your stomach and exhaling it seems like nothing but I had to learn to breathe and breath is life so regulating your breath connecting with yourself inside of you it really is such a great way to calm down and even still today when I feel just an inkling of anxiety a little tingle and I know something you know I'm getting stressed about something I immediately starts to breathe into my stomach and before I know it I'm feeling so much better number seven meditation walking yoga all of these acts that bring you closer to your source that is within you that is yourself I would walk an hour a day in the stillness of nature luckily my parents live in a very woodsy area that might not be easy to do if you're living in a city or the desert I guess but try to find a way to walk it really helps to be outside in nature that's why I said in step one find a safe space resort or retreat somewhere or get a plants try to connect with a living organism something about the exchange of energy it helped me I would go in outside and I would plant my feet in the grass and it was cold it was winter but I did it anyways my bare feet on the soil it helps I'm giving you all of the little things that helps each little thing contributes you healing they call it grounding by the way when you plant your feet on bare ground because the earth is made of energy and we are made of energy our material we are energy so having that exchange with nature mama nature it's kind of like recharging your battery because what you're going through is exhausting it is depleting so you have to find ways to recharge naturally which brings me to the next point number eight eat right make sure you are nourishing your body maximize healthy eating as much as possible limit the intake of junk it doesn't help I found that it would contribute a lot of people say alcohol would make anxiety worse I tried drinking once I'm not a drinker but I it did try to be as healthy as possible give your body the tools it needs to heal number nine is the most important tip tool change the narrative in your head what I had to do what I recommend you do is stop thinking like you used to it clearly doesn't serve you look at where you are so it's time to confront your thought processes your rationales and tell yourself maybe I need to start thinking differently even science has demonstrated this that our brain creates neural pathways so certain events will trigger certain thoughts automatically you know like repetition creates these neural pathways however you can break these bridges and create new connections so instead of something bad happening to you and your first thought is oh woe is me the world is terrible I hate these people my life sucks cut that bridge interrupts that pattern and try to create a new one where you're like that's probably happening for a reason oh that person did this because of X Y Z maybe you know what I'm okay I can live with whatever is happening you know think positively basically it takes a lot of training repetition to create these new pathways basically so you have to be patient it's not going to be immediate it takes constant effort and practice and that's what I did relentlessly every single day every moment I tried to catch myself in a negative thought and change it redirect its recalculating like a GPS a year later I'm still obviously sometimes struggling with negative thoughts but I catch them a lot quicker now and I have a lot less so it's easier to clean the cobwebs I don't know what you want to call them so a great way to help you change these neural pathways and to think differently is by content consumption I watched a lot of videos videos of philosophers of life coaches Tony Robbins Alan Watts etc I read a lot of books and listened to a lot of audiobooks self-help in nature a new earth The Four Agreements the book of joy I actually already created a video where I share my top five books for and audio books for mental health I watched Iyanla fix my life and Oprah super soul Sunday TED talks about anxiety and mental health and personally abraham-hicks talking about Law of Attraction super helped me so the book money and law of attraction I think that's really the book that helped me be most throughout this journey helped me see things in a different perspective and really motivated me to think differently so yeah it really was a mental health journey trial and error progress I saw an increase in the time between panic attacks you know it went from hours two more hours to days to weeks to months and now I'm hoping it'll be years years with an S it's a transformation you have to transform yourself I had to acknowledge and hug the angry scared little girl that was living inside of me who hadn't grown up who I did not move past I had to forgive people people that hurt me deeply I had to learn to forgive myself from huge mistakes that I made in my life that I just could not forgive myself for I had to learn to not be perfect or to not strive for perfection to the point where you are so dissatisfied with who you are in any given moment because you're not who you wish you were learning to love yourself I had to learn to be my own best friend I discovered a love for myself I never had before and I even developed spirituality that I had struggled with throughout my life I felt connected to God the source energy you know and in that sense I never felt alone anymore I had to learn about patience and I'm still learning about patience baby steps every time I consumed a piece of media that was helpful I would write down key words and sentences that would empower me and I would read them once a day once a week just constantly feeding my mind empowering statements positive statements positive affirmations yes I made a list of all of my fears and all of my negative thoughts and when I saw that list I was like whoa no wonder I broke any human under this much pressure and fear constant fear would go crazy and then what I did is I would make the same list but the opposite so any fear I had I would write the opposite empowering statement so if I wrote something like I think I'm fat and ugly I would write the opposite I am fit I am beautiful I am healthy and just go on like that you know as I was healing what also helped me recover was to take care of other people I was in a situation where I had to take care of my mother and my siblings and being there for them it kind of took me out of myself you know always being concentrated on fixing myself and getting better and loving it was about loving someone else and that also helps that positive energy that you give not just yourself but to others loving caring kindness compassion it fast-tracks your healing you can volunteer at a pet shelter or a homeless shelter or nursing home I don't know maybe those things will help you just a suggestion helping family was good enough for me so maybe you have family members I need help help them too but like I said when you're already stable enough that you're not panicking over leaving the house you know here are Tuesday means that I would repeat like mantras that really helped me calm down the first one was do it and do it badly the moment I was like oh my god I have to leave the house today or I have to meet people and I would get really anxious all of a sudden and I would feel a panic attack brewing I would like do it badly be a mess if you have to cry outside cry outside if you're gonna fall faint in front of people faint if you're going to mess up a task mess it up just do it but do it badly I would get an instant release of pressure so I recommend you saying that if ever you feel the pressures that we put on ourselves and then the second statement that I love is what is the use in suffering and worrying about things you can change and what is the use in suffering and worrying about things you cannot change basically what's the point of worrying if you can change it change it you can worry in the process but it's not gonna really help if you're in a situation you cannot help you cannot change like the way your body reacts when a panic attack comes on what's the point in worrying about it what's a point in suffering and driving yourself crazy if you can't change it that would also help me like relax you know I was like what's important to worry about this just let it pass through you you know I spent over 20 years of my life suffering self-inflicted suffering then I spent those three months of intense suffering from my mental break then I did the work for I would say three six eight months working on myself rehabilitating myself changing my thoughts my patterns my behavior fixing my brokenness in a way that enabled me to sometimes access happiness and joy pure happiness and joy so intense unfamiliar to me I had never been so happy I never felt such relief I had never felt such a joy and pleasure and where I am in my life now it's like I am living my best life sure there are hard days but I am anxiety free and have been for months I've made decisions in my life drastic decisions that were very scary but led to me feeling free like ending a relationship that wasn't serving me changing the job that wasn't serving me these bold steps you're taking brave steps you're taking towards being happy it helps it works so I'm telling you it can be done you can go from having a really hard time with depression and anxiety for years years years and end that there is no reason why it has to be your forever it's really just a question about doing something new to treat this you can do it beloved be patient with yourself baby steps relax don't take life so seriously believe in your process in your timeline but believe especially that you can get through this and you don't have to do it alone on Facebook there are mental health support systems and support groups open up to the people around you on social media you'll be surprised to see that there might be people in your own circle that a maybe have been through this and can help you or be are going through this and together you can help each other improve and and heal because that sentiment that you're alone in this and it'll never get better it's fog it's an illusion it's fog dissipate that fog it's no that's not true no don't accept that you are not hopeless you are not some unique rare case that you know oh that might work for everyone else but not for me no you're very much human you're very much capable you probably like everybody else you want love and happiness you don't want to cry you don't want pain you don't want suffering so I just want to emphasize the fact that no one else though can heal you but yourself you have to do the work throughout my journey I met people that asked for help and it seemed like they wanted help but when I would offer them advice and try to help them they weren't doing anything to help themselves it's like they were unconscious at how comfortable they were in their complaining about their situation rather than taking drastic measures to fix their situation playing the victim without even realizing it if you gonna challenge everything I suggest maybe you're not ready to recover maybe you like the fact that people pity you and they give you attention because you're in a dire state I don't know examine yourself that's all I'm saying I really hope that you find your solutions tailored to you like I said I also got a therapist talk space I think I have a referral link I'll leave it in the comment section below if you want to start off therapist is there to guide you and help you and be an ear but you're the one doing the work you have to be open you have to talk about things you don't want to talk about you have to examine things you have to analyze things you have to to think things through and be open to questioning why you think a certain way why you do certain things what's cool about talk space is that I could talk to somebody twice a day sometimes seven days out of a week that really helped me for a few months I tried it and it it really contributed to me healing as well and never give up never give up keep trying different things keep looking for resources out there something will speak to you something will motivate you inspire you give you comfort love yourself start with loving yourself because you are loved you are that pure energy that we call love you have to tap into that the last image I want to leave you with analogy if you will that I find very interesting I know some people that when one pixel on their cell phone screen dies just blacks out they are so bothered by it that they want a new phone and I'm talking about one pixel well imagine that in this large universe of ours you are that one pixel we are all pixels in the screen of the universe so you matter in the grand scheme of things to the whole and when you shine when we all shine bright together I don't know who's watching but it must be a beautiful picture you are needed in ways you don't even understand look at your life through heavens eyes is one of my favorite sentences even if I don't know you I am sending love your way take care of yourself you can do this you can heal I believe in you and I wish you all the luck and strength and love in the world thank you for watching and I really really hope that I've helped you share this with somebody that you think this might help as well take care bye [Music]

Channel: M-Angel Says

Views: 26,422

Keywords: M-Angel, how to, anxiety, how to reduce anxiety, how to beat anxiety, calm anxiety, stop gad, stop generalized anxiety disorder, stop depression, how to get out depression, healing, mental health, mental healing, mental health advice, mental illness help, self help, how to overcome depression anxiety, overcome mental illness, no medicine stop anxiety, medication free mental health advice, no medication advice anxiety, panic attacks, stop panic attacks, panic disorder cure

Id: UdsQJhtX9xU

Length: 29min 16sec (1756 seconds)

Published: Fri Nov 09 2018