How Embracing ADHD Unlocks The Power Of Learning | Katherine Lizardo | TEDxMilton HS

I was on pins and needles my husband had just picked up the mail I can see him waving this white envelope and I could see the emblem of my school it's here ever since I was a little girl in the Philippines I've always wanted to be a lawyer and it's my big American Dream now it feels that my big American dream is riding on that tiny piece of an envelope they say that your first grade during your first semester in law school determines how you succeed I told him he has to open it I'm just simply too nervous to do it I heard him rip open that paper he took that paper out and read it and with the longest pause that he could muster he blurted out you got straight A's yes I did it I grabbed that paper from his hand I wanted to see it for myself there capital letter Ace I felt like I just conquered Mount Everest I started jumping up and down and then I had my husband and we both started jumping up and down and then I started running all over our tiny apartment waving my hands in the air I just stake my flag on that Mount Everest life felt good I don't always feel that way while I did well in school in the Philippines there would be episodes that are embarrassing and I can't quite explain them but they made me feel and questioned if I was smart for example I was in fifth grade and I decided to learn a musical instrument we had limited selection and so I picked the organ which is this bulky wooden box with two levels of keys like piano and it has Petals on the floor on the day of the recital I realized I forgot one crucial detail I forgot to practice not right forget to practice I mean I've been going to my music class every single day and then I realized that my teacher told us that we have free time to practice our music but I got distracted instead of practicing I decided to figure out how the petals work I tried to call my nerves I took a deep breath I tried to convince myself that the music will come back to me once I'm on stage yeah that wishful thinking vanished I walked on that wooden stage smelling that fragrant white flowers adorning the stage I could feel my classmates gaze my teachers and my family looking at me waiting for me to play I sat on that wooden stool and started playing I tried not to close my eyes in agony as I heard that sound coming from the organ but I continued playing what I thought was my music after that last note I prepared myself for the worst part I had to get up I had to walk to the center of the stage with pursed lips my eyes staring straight not looking at anyone not making eye contact I took a bow in front of the silent crowd I never talked to anyone at that event that night I never talked to my parents about that after the recital I never retold that story until today I buried that deep I didn't want to think about it it was just too painful to remember but I promised myself I won't let that happen again even though I don't even know how it happened in the first so I lived my life pretending it never happened I immigrated to the United States when I was in high school I went to college I graduated and I started working then the embarrassing episodes came back but this time at work I was starting to feel depressed because of my inconsistent performances I didn't know what was happening so I decided to finally see a psychiatrist who diagnosed me with ADHD as an adult I didn't know what that meant I thought only kids get that so I decided to learn more I read books magazines articles and then I read an article about hyperactivity I wasn't hyper so I wanted to learn more I got deeper when I finally went to law school and graduated and achieved my big American dream of becoming a lawyer I was able to confirm that I could have ADHD and be a successful lawyer too but that made me wonder how come I'm only hearing stories about ADHD and the Broken Ones then I read this article about this nine-year-old boy whose teacher told him that he would never succeed in life because he could not focus he was just too disruptive he could not sit still for 30 minutes in class but he could swim for three hours straight in a pool he transformed his wiggling in class to wiggling in the pool and becoming the best Olympic swimmer of all time how did Michael Phelps do that how did Michael Phelps have ADHD and succeed I continued going to my therapy once a week for 21 years ever since my diagnosis at some point my therapist told me that my kids will have adhd2 I confirmed that when I read the book of Dr Russell Barkley he's the leading ADHD expert and in his book he wrote that a parent who has ADHD has a 40 percent to 57 percent chance of having a child with ADHD knowing that my kids and my grandkids lives are now at stake I was even more motivated to learn about ADHD I actually got pregnant twice while I was a lawyer and had kids I have two fascinating kids one of whom has ADHD so I shifted my focus as a mom and having loved my kids unconditionally I changed my objective from trying to overcome ADHD to embracing it that's why today I want to share with all of you how I did it how I got here here are the three intentional actions I took to get here today first I truly understood my ADHD second I reframed my view of ADHD third I gave myself permission to ask why questions truly understanding ADHD you have to learn deeper dig deeper than the surface 20 years ago my psychiatrist recommended this book for me I bought it I read it after I read it I had no idea what it said so many like executive functions that were so foreign to me especially since English is my second language but now I can Google terminologies that I don't understand after reading a book I can watch YouTube and with graphics and animation actually learn deeper so remember with our evolving technology use that and don't take that for granted in learning deeper even though there's a lot of information out there most of them are disjointed and some are based on outdated research and some are even based on myths that's why now my mission is to simplify ADHD and debunk those myths I actually was very surprised how little I knew as well for example I thought ADHD was about being hyper and unable to focus after all the name is hyperactivity hyperactivity oh attention deficit hyperactivity disorder there you go that's how ADHD works right you forget some of the words and it's totally fine ADHD stands for attention deficit hyper activity but it's not about hyperactivity and it's not about Focus like many people I relied on the name alone to Define ADHD but I was wrong this system of defining it that way is greatly mistaken that approach is wrong and when you do your own research you realize and you'll confirm for yourself that the name ADHD is wrong doctors know this experts know this most people with ADHD know this so why has the name yet to be changed it's because doing so will create a ripple effect of unintended consequences to loss rules and regulations that benefit people with ADHD as a lawyer I know how challenging it is to amend laws I wish it was easy though but we can do something about it still we can research diligently to find the truth because the more you read the more you research the more you learn about it the more you can compare and contrast information and sources the more you know for yourself what is valid data and what is based on folklore now the second step is about reframing your view of ADHD and once I understood ADHD truly something magical and unexpected happened I realized something inevitable truly understanding ADHD leads to positive perception of ADHD we see so many successful stories of 8-h people nowadays who have done exactly that they were able to transform themselves and their weaknesses they were able to play up their strengths and compensate for their weaknesses That's The Power of learning about your ADHD and the profound learning doesn't stop there because the third step is to permit yourself and others the question why why did you do that why did you say it that way why did you think it that way why did it work for me this time but not others instead of simply memorizing content engage in the process of understanding other people are likely asking the same question too so to recap the three intentional actions you can take to embrace ADHD is first truly understand your ADHD second reframe your view of ADHD third permit yourself to ask why questions so as you go about your day there's a simple action you can take to remember to embrace your ADHD and that is tap your heart like this try there think of it as a like button but better press your Embrace ADHD button so if you forget your keys again and you tell yourself how could I possibly forgotten it why can't I just pay attention why can't I focus or any other negative self-talk press your Embrace ADHD button I leave you with these words that I heard three days ago and I paraphrase from one of my favorite inspirational speakers and authors Simon Scenic who also has ADHD there's no positive or negative it's all contextual I have attributes that in the wrong context can cause me pain distractibility a little unreliable and I talk too much but in the right context it could be a source of great inspiration exceptional creativity and profound Focus I can do in one day what people can do in a week I call it hyper Focus I'm immensely grateful that I was born with it because it has given me my life my purpose and my kids and in turn if you have ADHD it has given you so many traits that makes you you got this foreign

Channel: TEDx Talks

Views: 99,248

Keywords: Acceptance, Achievement, Childhood, Compassion, Development, English, Family, Health, TEDxTalks, [TEDxEID:53688]

Id: -VJWowFjvOU

Length: 16min 33sec (993 seconds)

Published: Fri Aug 04 2023