Kenneth Lamar Noid walks into a Domino’s Pizza
shop in Chamblee, Georgia. The smell of freshly baking dough and tomato sauce fill the air. The
man behind the counter smiles and asks Kenneth what he can get him. After a moment's pause,
Kenneth pulls out a gun. “I want $100,000, a white limousine, and a book,” he says. “And if I
don’t get it, I’m killing everyone in this store.” Sean Burnsed freezes as the .357 Magnum is
pointed at him. Adrenaline pumps through his body as his fight or flight response
engages. “Whatever you want man,” he tells Kenneth. Burnsed fumbles with the
cash register. He puts in the wrong code, and the drawer doesn’t open. The gunman
becomes visibly upset. He tries again, and this time the drawer opens. The store itself
doesn’t have $100,000 in the register or safe, which means that Burnsed and his
co-worker are about to become hostages. Kenneth seems to want more than just
cash, though. Burnsed and his co-worker had opened the shop only minutes before
Kenneth Noid walked in and took out his gun. Originally they had just wanted
to make it through the day so they could get paid and go home. Now all they
want is to get out of the store alive. “Take everything in the register,” Burnsed
tells the gunman. Kenneth looks at him, becoming a little bit annoyed. He starts
explaining that it's not just about the money; Domino’s has been using his identity and making
fun of him at the same time. He believes that Tom Monaghan, the owner of Domino’s, owes him
a lot of money because their new mascot is based on him. Burnsed pauses for a moment with a
confused look on his face. “The mascot?” he asks. Burnsed glances at the poster hung up on the wall
of the store. On it is the claymation mascot of Domino’s called “ the Noid”. The man pointing a
gun at him tells Burnsed that his name is Kenneth Lamar Noid. Burnsed immediately realizes the
mascot’s and Kenneth’s last name are the same. This man is clearly not well as the resemblance
ends there, but he isn’t about to tell him that. Kenneth Noid had first seen Domino’s
new mascot in a television commercial, just like millions of other people
in 1986. Domino’s had developed the character to sell their groundbreaking
new promotion: delivery of your pizza in 30 minutes or less or your cash back. In the
commercial, “the Noid,” short for annoyed, tries all sorts of crazy gimmicks to delay a
Domino’s pizza from being delivered on time. These commercials were a huge success. People
not only loved the idea of getting their pizza delivered quickly, but they loved the mascot as
well. This started to bring Domino’s more and more business, which meant they had big plans for the
Noid. In fact, the Noid character itself became so popular that he even made appearances in Michael
Jackson’s musical film “Moonwalker,” video games, and clothing lines. But Kenneth Lamar Noid did
not like the new mascot one bit. He truly thought that Domino’s was using it to directly make fun
of him. This led Kenneth to the conclusion that he needed to do something drastic to get Tom
Monaghan’s attention. He decided that holding a Domino’s store hostage was the best way to get
what he rightfully deserved from the company. Kenneth Noid yells at Burnsed to get Monaghan
on the phone. In a panic, Burnsed starts to tell Kenneth that he doesn’t know the number to
reach Tom Monaghan. Employees are not normally privileged to that information, but before he
speaks, Burnsed remembers that he was given the safety hotline number during his training.
He dials this number; the phone begins to ring. It seems like an eternity until a friendly
female voice picks up. Burnsed looks at Kenneth, who is still pointing the gun at him, and explains
to the woman on the other line what is going on. Kenneth Noid tells Burnsed to inform her of
exactly why he wants to talk to Tom Monaghan. The lady on the other line chuckles as she
thinks this is some kind of joke. Then, over the receiver, she hears a gunshot. The
line goes deadly quiet. Another shot is fired and can be heard through the phone’s speaker.
Burnsed comes back on the line and tells her that Kenneth Noid just fired two bullets into
the ceiling to show he was serious. He pleads with the woman on the phone to get in contact
with the owner of Domino’s by any means possible. She immediately picks up another phone
and dials the police. On Burnsed’s line, she can hear Kenneth screaming that he will
kill everyone in the store if he doesn’t get exactly what he wants. Kenneth Noid grabs
the phone from Burnsed’s hand and continues yelling into it. Then he hangs up and slams
the phone back into its receiver. Shocked, the woman working the safety hotline tells the
police exactly what happened and the location of the Domino’s store where people are being held
at gunpoint. Officers are immediately dispatched, and the Domino’s hostage situation
over the Noid mascot officially begins. Burnsed and his co-worker are stuck behind
the counter. Kenneth points his gun at them as every phone in the store begins ringing at
once. The sound of sirens can be heard in the distance. The Domino’s employees can clearly
see that Kenneth is unhinged. They don’t know if they will make it out of the pizza shop
alive, but they do their best to remain calm. As police cars surround the Domino’s shop and
blue flashing lights flood through the window, Kenneth Noid fires four warning shots into the
ceiling. The police realize just how dangerous the situation is. They don’t fire back, but
they draw their guns and cover all of the exits. Kenneth locks all of the doors and stays
away from the windows. Officers get a glimpse of him every now and then but
cannot safely take a shot at Kenneth. The phones continue to ring as negotiators
try to get through to the man holding the store hostage. Finally, Kenneth Noid picks up.
On the other line is a negotiator. They talk for a few minutes while the negotiator listens and
builds a profile of the man he’s speaking to. Kenneth explains how Domino’s is using the
Noid to make fun of him and how the company owes him a lot of money for what they’ve done.
The negotiator actively listens to Kenneth and tells him that he’s being heard but that he needs
to release the hostages as a sign of good faith. Kenneth Noid loses his cool and begins screaming
at the top of his lungs. The negotiator becomes worried that he might do something drastic. He
talks Kenneth down and continues to listen to what he has to say. Although he is coherent,
a lot of the things Kenneth is communicating are irrational. He also no longer just wants
money but a getaway plane to Mexico as well. The negotiator has Kenneth go back to
the beginning of his story and explain once more why he is holding the people within
the pizza shop hostage. The police are biding their time as they formulate a plan to get
everyone out of the Domino’s store alive. Kenneth goes through his whole convoluted story
of how Tom Monaghan created the Noid mascot to taunt him and make him look stupid. There is
no reasoning with Kenneth Noid at this point, so the negotiator just listens. Kenneth
explains that he still wants the money, but he also requires the police to bring him
a copy of a science fiction book called “The Widow’s Son”. The negotiator says they
can get the book first and will work on the rest as securing the money and plane
will take time. Obviously, the police are not getting Kenneth a plane or the money, but
they need to keep him talking. As negotiations continue, chaos breaks out at the Domino’s
headquarters in Ann Arbor, Michigan. The executives of the company meet in a
boardroom to closely follow the hostage situation. They inform the police that they
are willing to provide them with anything they need in order to get their people
out safely. Monaghan even goes as far as to offer them his private jet if it will
help with the negotiations. The police tell the executives they’ll be kept in the loop,
but for now, everything is under control. Even with this reassurance, the heads
of the company can’t help but worry. They have all of the televisions in the
conference room on. Every major news station in the country is reporting on the
hostage situation. Headlines flash across the screens as reporters speculate what the
most likely outcome will be. At any moment, Kenneth Noid might snap, and people
could be seriously injured or killed. Back in Georgia, the police get their
hands on a copy of “The Widow’s Son.” The negotiator informs Kenneth
that they have the book for him, but he will have to release one of the
hostages in exchange for the novel. This does not sit well with Kenneth. He once
again begins screaming into the phone about the conspiracy Domino’s has been perpetrating
to make him look like an idiot. Kenneth Noid then tells the negotiator he doesn’t want the
book anymore and is keeping all the hostages. The law enforcement agents on the scene regroup
to come up with a new plan. It might be time to consider using force. They must either get into
the pizza shop to confront Kenneth or find some way to get him to let the hostages come out. While
the police formulate their next course of action, Burnsed takes matters into his own hands. He knows
that the officers outside are trying their best, but it might not be enough. He can see
how disgruntled Kenneth Noid is becoming and is afraid that if he doesn’t
calm down, someone could get hurt. Burnsed begins to talk to Kenneth. He tells him
that he believes his story and that he feels awful for what Domino’s has done to him. Burnsed
then asks if he can get Kenneth anything. They have been in the shop for a few hours now, and
everyone is nervous and exhausted. Kenneth Noid looks up at the menu and thinks for a moment.
He asks for an “ExtravaganZZa” pizza. Burnsed tells him it's no problem at all and gets
to work making the pizza with his co-worker. The two Domino’s employees put four
kinds of meats, a plethora of veggies, and extra mozzarella cheese onto the pizza.
They slide it into the oven and wait. Time ticks by. There has been no communication from
the negotiator for a while now. Kenneth Noid paces back and forth across the store. The oven dings
and the steaming pizza is pulled out and placed onto the counter. Burnsed reaches for a pizza
cutter when Kenneth starts screaming at him. “Don’t touch that!” he shouts. Burnsed freezes
and drops the pizza cutter in his hand. “Did you think I wouldn’t notice you were
going to attack me with the pizza cutter?” Kenneth asks. Burnsed had no intention
of trying to fight off a man with a gun using only a pizza cutter. But Kenneth
doesn’t believe him. He tells Burnsed to just leave the pizza as it is, and he will
eat it without having it cut into slices. Burnsed shrugs and hands the uncut pizza over to
Kenneth. He begins chowing down on the pizza as the two Domino’s employees stand in the corner of
the store. On the other side of the front door, dozens of police officers aim their pistols at
the shop. Across the street, a crowd of people has gathered. News reporters give minute-to-minute
updates while pedestrians look on in anticipation. Even though Kenneth Noid has been given one of
the most expensive pizzas on the menu, he is still dissatisfied. He continues to ask where his
money and plane are. No matter what the negotiator says over the phone, no headway seems to be
made. The officers in charge decide that they need to go into the shop to talk to Kenneth. The
face-to-face interaction will give the police a better idea of his mental and physical state while
also allowing them to check in on the hostages. The negotiator calls the store and waits
for Kenneth to pick up. When he does, the negotiator calmly explains that they
need to have an in-person meeting to talk about what the next steps will
be. After going back and forth, Kenneth finally agrees to let officers into
the store. Everyone gears up and prepares for the meeting. However, no one could
have predicted what would happen next. It is clear that Kenneth Noid is unstable. The
negotiator puts on a bulletproof vest just in case things go sideways. He hopes that by talking to
Kenneth in person, he can convince him to release at least one of the hostages. The last thing
anyone wants is a shootout, but this is still a very real possibility, and the police know it.
They tell everyone who is watching the situation unfold to stay back. This is a crucial moment
for the hostages and the mission as a whole. The negotiator signals to Kenneth that he’s
ready to proceed. Kenneth has become extra cautious at this point. The police brought him
the book he requested but haven’t met any of his other demands. He knows that they might try
to shoot him if he goes to the door himself. So, Kenneth tells Burnsed to unlock
the door and let the negotiator in. Burnsed slowly walks up to the front door. He
reaches out and turns the deadbolt. The door unlocks with a loud click. Burnsed looks back at
Kenneth and sees that he is several feet away and hiding near the counter. He takes a deep breath,
closes his eyes for a moment, and then pushes the door wide open. He rushes out and sprints as
fast as he can towards the nearest police car. The whole time he is running, all Burnsed can
think about is how easily Kenneth could just shoot him in the back. But he had to get out of
the store. Although Kenneth hadn’t harmed him or his co-worker yet, he was slowly becoming more and
more unhinged. It was only a matter of time before Kenneth Noid did something crazy, and Burnsed
was not going to wait around for it to happen. Burnsed pushes his body as hard
as it will go. Officers run out from behind their cover and escort him
to safety. Burnsed collapses and tells the police everything he knows about
the situation inside. Every piece of information is vital if they are going to end
the standoff without anyone getting killed. Kenneth Noid begins to scream as one of his
hostages escapes. He runs towards the door but thinks better of it. Kenneth turns and
sprints towards the counter and hides behind it. As he turns his back to the door for a moment,
Burnsed’s co-worker makes a mad dash for the exit. The co-worker bursts through the opening and runs
to safety. The police have secured both hostages, but the gunman is still held up in the Domino’s
store. They are really hoping the situation can end without any casualties, but Kenneth is
armed, dangerous, and now extremely mad. The sun is setting over the small town just
outside of Atlanta. It has been nearly five hours since Kenneth Noid entered the
Domino’s pizza. Through the windows, police can see that Kenneth appears to be
talking to himself. This man is not well, and they are worried that he could hurt
himself or do something drastic if they don’t get to him soon. The negotiator gets
back on the phone and talks to Kenneth. Kenneth Noid no longer has any hostages or
leverage to get what he wants. The negotiator tells him that it’s over, but he still wants
to help. If Kenneth surrenders willingly and without incident, the judge will be lenient as
he hasn’t hurt anyone yet. There is a pause on the other line. Kenneth hangs up the phone. The
negotiator doesn’t know what will happen next. All eyes are on the pizza shop. Kenneth Noid
approaches the front door and opens it. Every officer in the parking lot has their gun
aimed at him. Kenneth places his firearm on the ground and puts his hands over his
head. Police officers slowly approach him, place his hands behind his back, and arrest him.
The hostage situation caused by a misunderstanding over the Domino’s mascot has come to an end.
But the Noid’s story is not quite over yet. Kenneth Lamar Noid is placed in jail to await
his trial. He is charged with kidnapping, aggravated assault, and theft
by extortion. During his trial, Kenneth explains to the court that Tom Monaghan
was entering his apartment and snooping around at night. He states that Monaghan then used
the information he gathered on him to create the Noid mascot. It is clear from Kenneth’s
testimony that he is paranoid and mentally ill. After some deliberation, the judge finds
Kenneth not guilty due to insanity. He is placed in the care of a psychiatric ward, where
he receives the help he needs to move past his delusions. For several years Kenneth receives
psychiatric care. His progress is slow and he continues to believe in the delusion that the
Noid mascot is out to get him. The doctors give him medications and have him in therapy
multiple times a week, but nothing seems to help. At the same time that Kenneth is being
treated, Domino’s continues to use the Noid in their commercials. Even if Kenneth
didn’t like the mascot, other people did, and it was helping the company sell pizza. The
Noid continued to try and thwart Domino’s pizza delivery personnel from getting to their
customers in 30 minutes or less. He used a freeze ray to try and make Domino's pizza cold
upon delivery, but no matter what the Noid did, he would always fail. It is these commercials
that led to the Noid becoming a small but memorable part of peoples’ lives. The nostalgia
that they felt for the Noid helped the character come back in future adventures, even after
the hostage situation at the pizza shop. But as Domino’s continued to promote their
products and the business continued to grow, things started getting worse and worse for Kenneth
Noid. He was still receiving psychiatric help, but his delusions persisted. Then
in 1995, Kenneth Noid passed away tragically. It was around this same time
that Domino’s stopped using the Noid mascot. The timing may have been coincidental
as no official statement was made. Some spokespeople in the company said Domino’s
was just going in another direction, and their former mascot wasn’t in line with their
marketing strategy anymore. But others speculated that the decision to stop using the Noid had
to do with Kenneth’s passing. Either way, by the mid-1990s, the Noid mascot stopped
appearing on merch and in new commercials and became just a memory for many. However,
the Noid would one day appear again. When Domino’s started tossing around
the idea of self-driving delivery cars, the Noid was brought up as the perfect villain
for their commercials. However, nothing ever came of this. In 2011 Domino’s created the “Noid’s
Super Pizza Shootout” Facebook game to promote their brand on social media. This was short-lived
and didn’t seem to help sell very many pizzas, but it did show that the Noid was still in
the marketing department’s bag of tricks. In fact, the Noid made a much more recent
appearance in 2021 in the Crash Bandicoot video game franchise. The game Crash
Bandicoot: On the Run! includes a level where the player has to dodge the Noid’s
freeze rays in order to complete the level. The hostage situation that developed as
a result of a mentally ill man having the same last name as the Domino’s mascot
was tragic. Kenneth Lamar Noid needed help, and the day he walked into a Domino’s with
a loaded gun asking for reparations from the pizza company for using his identity was
the beginning of the end for both him and the Noid. Even though the Domino’s mascot still
makes an appearance now and then, the hostage situation likely put a damper on the company’s
future plans for the mascot in the 1990s. Now watch “Insane Way Bank Robbers
Executed Perfect Bank Heist (Stole $20 Million).” Or check out “Why
Diplomats Can Commit Any Crime.”
