How Do You Work on Yourself? w/ @Rachel Cruze

hey y'all I'm hanging out with my good friend in real life Rachael Cruz and we are talking about how do you work on yourself Rachael this is a struggle for people because I think they want to work on themselves but they're not sure how and it feels selfish and I know for years you've helped people with money and when you dig into it it's not just money like money is bleeding into every area of their life and you end up helping them with their life so talk a little bit about what you've been doing and how you do that yes it's so true when everyone so excited oh yeah yeah money I see it as a tool to help you in every area of your life okay so whether it's your marriage and you're planning a vacation whether it's your family and you're deciding okay you know even go out to eat as a family I mean whatever it is money is a tool that helps us with our lives and so for me getting people under control with that tool and saying hey this tool doesn't need to consume you you actually need to be able to control it that helps but at the end of the day it is it is so much about people's lives because especially I'll say with marriage yeah when I'm talking to a couple I mean the amount of questions I get of my spouse doesn't want to do a budget was mirrors your house is not as passionate of getting out of debt and you start really really digging in you end up finding marriage problems right right I mean we all have them right it's not like but money can reveal that it was parenting right I mean I even get in a bad cycle of like my four-year-old Emilia she loves like bracelets she calls them her treasure I love treasure you know the Moloch okay I could go to Amazon and buy like 50 of them for 10 bucks and keep her happy for two weeks but I've realized I started doing that I'm like no no no why why am i doing that it's because I realize wow I'm kind of being lazy as a parent I don't want to engage her it's just easier just to give her stuff and I'm like I teach this stuff all the day how that's unhealthy and Here I am doing it so they can be self-aware that you even realized like yeah that's impressive yeah so again money touches every part of our lives but it goes even deeper it's kind of the the it masks the problem but when you actually dig into it it becomes life problems yeah and money just manifests out of it I think it's so interesting because you and I are friends off camera and we have you know we talk all day every day through Marco Polo and like you know text or whatever and we'll be talking even about in our own lives not just money but just hey I'm struggling with this with my kids I'm struggling with this with a work schedule or man I really want to read more and I don't know how to make time for it I mean if I think this is a real struggle that people deal with and you do not talk about it all the time and so I find such encouragement and hey friends that you'd be like hey are you struggling with this or what do you do but for our listeners let's just talk about that like what what does it look like in your life to work on yourself to grow as a person to try to improve yourself and invest in yourself like what does that look like yes I think a big part is just its being intentional for me the needs that are in front of me okay and so for me it may further could be a season where I'm like hey my need is I just need quiet time so that means I'm gonna get up extra early and just have time by myself whether I'm reading scripture drinking coffee whatever it is like that could be a season of that I'm currently in a season of figuring out like I just want to like do deeper work and me we got so what would you show us but you're like obsessed we've been talking about this a ton even on our own yeah my gosh and so I'm just like for me right now in this season it's about learning more about what's going on in my heart and and I'm in a season of counseling for counseling name and and I a lot of my and that's what's crazy God has put people in my life a lot of my close people you being one of them we're all in the season together it kind of feels like we're all on this journey and not everyone's connected but like I have so many outlets of relationships even including my husband like this is just a conversation so for me right now in this season I just know I want to work on my heart the part of me so I think it's just being aware of what do you need in this season and being intentional that because you can't do it alright look I'm like you always say it but life balance is not about being 50/50 it's not having the perfect amount of time to work out how's your life work family I mean it's not gonna be sliced perfectly and so for me again it's just digging into like this specific season what do I feel the tug of my heart being okay that question right there though like you said that as kind of a flyover but that question I feel like so many people miss hmm what do I need right now like even for me or women that I work with I see this all the time where women are running so hard like it's like fixing lunch it's getting dry cleaning trying to just keep up with the day-to-day they never stop you asked that question yep they never stop saying what do I need right now yeah I need a nap or do I need to work out or do I need to get in my Bible or like for you has that become a habit of practice like how do you even stop your crazy world to ask yourself that question because that's a really important question yeah and honestly I think God's put people in my life to make me aware of it because it's so easy subconsciously just to go through life like you're saying you're just doing tasks and checking off and making sure ever it's breathing at the end of every one cigarette if you like we're good but man and that over again a short season maybe survival mode but I'm like I don't want to live my whole life like that and so we've even heard um someone talked recently and they said like our souls are created for a village like we're supposed to know like what's going on like we were never created to know what's happening on the other side of the world like it's like we're almost on empathy overload and so for me that's just like hit home for me where I'm like we're in such a rush emotionally physically everything and like I don't think we were created for that so I'm pushing hard against it because I'm a task oriented person I like seeing achievement I like doing stuff and for me to like force myself to slow down is is something that again people have been telling me but they're doing in their own lines-- and it's just encouraged me so I think it's being around a community and people around you growing honestly has helped me grow that make sense yeah oh yeah sure because when you're around people it becomes contagious whatever it is yes if people are running fast I want you to run faster if people are just chilling out you're like oh maybe I can show you a memory in the book we might pull out there's a bit of reading about hurrying up and I'm like oh my gosh that's a that was another gone moment for me Chrissy's reading this book I've got to get this book like the ruthless elimination of hurry and I'm so into this book right now specifically because he's talking about how hurry keeps us from having a deeper relationship with God and so like I think about this with my kids I'm not nice when I'm in a hurry you were talking about this morning even trying to get out the door to get to work you're like it's hard yes when you're in a hurry okay so when we're talking of these different aspects of our life whether it's our faith or our health or our relationships our marriage whatever do you find that it is easier for you to work on some areas than others like some you have a natural pool like me I want to invest in this I constantly go to this but other ones I should I should I want to but I just have trouble getting around to it absolutely okay well my gosh for sure I'm curious um right now like the part that I'm kind of hyped up marriage yeah once and I are in like a great season right now and we're like canceling amen yes I know but like we're connecting on a whole different level because you're working on it I want to clarify that nah man that's easy but because you're working on it yeah yeah we just looked up like wow for two years we kind of just been living like this and I'm like oh that's probably not like what are we not digging into you start digging it's so good so rich right so that's good my my least is the physicalist blown away and the hard thing is and I thought like we're putting demands on people like this is this should be your workout regimen nothing like that but there is their science and proof like if you just get up and move more it does things to your body like again it's not better yes you just feel better so I know cuz I'm just exhausted at the end of the day I'm like man if I know if I just did a couple of things just for myself not for anyone else but for me to feel better that that's true yeah okay you talked a minute ago about being intentional and I know you've talked about this a lot not just your money with your marriage with your health whatever yeah but the biggest struggle is time and then you feel this and I feel this our listeners feel this or if you were still this like how do you make the time to be intentional how do you make the time to work on yourself how do you make the time for these things that not just you feel like you should it's not that obligatory all I need to do but you want to I want to read more I want to but I never seem to find the time make the time whatever for sure what does that look like for you when you're trying to be intentional and it seems like every minute is taken up yes this is super tactical but it just it's hell no do it is I just put it in my schedule okay like I mean I live on my calendar oh yeah until like whether it's like forcing myself to say okay no I'm gonna go to counseling this week or whatever it is I put that block in and I'm like yet nothing else is gonna go here or in the morning I block off yeah I'm gonna you know go in at this time for work and so I have this time so like I literally tactically put it on my calendar so that helps me just have it in there but another thing is I find if you can overlap things that's helped me so again talking about like my emotions and my feelings recent yeah and understanding that more I'm sitting about cuz a lot of my friends are in that same journey so if we're if I'm hanging out with girls at night our conversations become intentional about things in our heart so it's like things that I need that I find time like oh yeah sometimes it's just hard just to focus on myself if I have a girls night we end up going in conversation it's almost like two of my things overlap right so it's like if you have a friend that who loves to run okay you could hang out with your friend and y'all go run together so it's like you can do two things at once right so I found in this season that's helped me yeah I love that because a lot of times people feel like they have to choose well I can either do something for myself or be a good mom or be active I'm like I can do all these things I can go for a hike with my kids I'm being active Emma yeah exactly yep so that's how you combine that I love that okay one of the things that I think a lot of people struggle with as well is this idea that working on yourself is selfish it's like the equivalent of a pedicure you didn't mean it's like anything for me feels about me it feels selfish there's so many other needs people need me I should be cleaning I should be reorganizing the toys whatever how do we get over this idea of the guilt and the shame associated with there's no growth personal development so we can be a better mom be a better wife be a better leader be a better anything business owner how do I get over this idea of it's selfish to work on yourself that's the case but it is it's like almost like an undercurrent it's not always right here in the front of mind like I'm selfish but we neglect it again and again because of I should be doing this yeah I just know for myself I'm like I'm just such a better mom I'm such a better wife I'm such a better friend when I'm functioning out of the whole person of who I am I like but I like that word I got a whole person yeah so when I can like when I can work on myself and make time again whether it is something like a pedicure maybe you have to get away for an hour go go do that or something as intense as you know reading a big self-development book and your minds being blowing every page right I mean like whatever it is that you're doing you're creating a better person so I'm like for me I don't see it as selfish I see it you know since it's selfless because I'm a better wife right I'm a better mom like they're getting a much better part they're much better me than if I am like at my wit's end and I'm stressed and I'm empty emotionally all the things like that's not a fun Rachel yeah like no one needs that and I don't want my kids memory to be of that mom right of this tired like you don't I mean I wrote them to see a joyful whole mom and but that means I have to work on myself to become whole yeah I love how you said that maybe it's just flipping the script and saying like I'm doing this for them for them because I'm gonna be better for them not oh it's for me it is but it's also every mom is wired differently and so I even here's some working moms who like our passion other job they love it is there the mom guilt are these the struggles are there yes but I've heard so many friends say like but I'm such a I'm such a better mom like and not that made everyone may not feel like it's right for them that's right but it but I'm like yeah that's a great point for you like yeah it's like you just come home and you're you know you're playing with your kids more than you would if you were just home eight hours a day every day cuz of how you're wired yeah it's like no you have to know yourself um one of the things that I love that you've hit on multiple times is you're seeing in your circle that your friends and the people closest to you are kind of walking on this journey with you and I'm so um I think that's such a good point because a lot of women feel alone or or tired or feeling I'm the only one that feels this way and so I just think it's a great take away as we wrap up to surround yourself with people and you're like you and I are so in sync oh not from work to just having our third baby yes and just kind of this season of life together and let me tell you this Christie I found the riches I'm like in my season of like rich relationship yeah whether it's marriage or friends I'm just like on a high yeah because I have my four girlfriends you're one of them yeah one of the four that knows everything about me but in order for me to be known I have to be vulnerable and willing to share and you know that I mean after what you been up to I'll come I'll call Chris Mike we need to get the download and you do the same and I learn things of what you're learning right right but you have to be willing to be known yeah and that can be scary so I would always encourage women find one would rent yes start with one you don't have to have six but be willing to be vulnerable because if you're the first one to open up usually if it's a safe spy and you trust the person it's reciprocated yeah you may have to be the one to initiate it and it is that deeper level of friendship and relationship that I didn't have at that surface level wall right so I'm so thankful because we get to do this in work in route you know all on a set in an office and you know put it all together but at the same time like we're gonna go Marco after this me like oh my gosh you know whatever and it's just so fun that those friendships are authentic on screen and off sync so I'm sure something for you thanks for being here I know people are probably wanting to know like how they can connect with you and find you so come all your details so she'll be very yeah what you're up to yes all you got Rachel Cruise everything and a YouTube show the Rachel Crew show Anna podcast on it so I'm gonna check that up awesome oh thank you thank you for being here thanks

Channel: The Christy Wright Show

Views: 5,182

Keywords: christy wright, life, encouragement, business, leadership, How Do You Work on Yourself?, rachel cruze

Id: 7tXUuGI-krc

Length: 13min 22sec (802 seconds)

Published: Thu Jun 04 2020