[ominous music] I realized that if they
didn't get me out pretty soon, my neck was going to snap. [slamming sound] That was the moment,
which I thought, this is it. This is the end. This is how I will die. And I thought
I'm going to hell. And I was terrified. [ominous music] And that's when being human
and occupying this human body of ours just came
flooding back into me. [ominous music] [acoustic guitar playing] My husband and I moved to
Colorado about 13 years ago. And probably everybody that
lives there, myself included, feel it's probably about as
close to heaven as you can get. The antique store has become
kind of a tourist destination. So we know everybody
in town, and everybody brings their friends
when they come to Salida. It's just worked out
really wonderful. It was getting close
to Thanksgiving. And during that time, I usually
go to the Springs, number 1, to do shopping for
our antique store, and then also, usually, to
have dinner with my son, do some more shopping the
next day, and then, take off. [ominous music] I was pretty loaded with stuff. I had bought a lot of
stuff for the store. I was very happy. My dog was in the backseat. Reebok is my best friend. He's my pal and buddy. I got him as a rescue puppy. And he's just with me
24/7, everywhere I go. Unfortunately, when I was
just a few miles out of town, my wheel caught off
the side of the road, and scared me to death. I thought I had a blow out. [ominous music] I was hanging on to
the steering wheel. I saw these two 18
wheelers coming down. I figured I probably
had about three seconds to live at that point. [ominous music] What I did not realize was
to the right of the road, was a very steep embankment. And I'm doing about 60
miles an hour so, of course, it propelled my car up
the embankment, sent it into a spin, so to speak. And a couple of spins later,
my car landed upside down. [ominous music] And the next sound I heard
was glass, the crunching of glass and plastic bags. And that's when I realized
that my dog, Reebok, was in the back seat. He was scrambling over these
bags, crunching the glass, and I heard him
leave the vehicle. And I started
screaming, "Get my dog. Get my dog. Please, somebody
just get my dog." [ominous music] I tried to pull myself
out of the vehicle, but I realized that
the weight of my body was right on the center
point of the back of my neck. And I couldn't
wiggle myself free. I couldn't really do anything
but hang onto the steering wheel and try to keep my body
weight up so that it didn't snap my neck. [ominous music] I was screaming for my dog, or
yelling as loudly as I could. It was getting harder to call
for him because my mouth was filling with fluids. And I was starting to choke. And all the color was
starting to go from my vision. I was scared because I should
have been driving home. I should have been with my dog,
and all my goodies going back to Salida. I had no idea that
life could change in a fraction of a second. [whooshing sound] [ominous music] Anniston's a small
town environment. People know each other. A good school that our kids
go to so it's a great place to live. [ominous music] You know, the funny thing
is I don't like rodents. I don't like insects. But it was a job, and
it paid the bills. So I would spend my days
crawling under houses. I had gotten a call that I
need to go to this house that was having some problems. And so probably about 5
o'clock when I arrived there. And you know, I pull up to the
house, and Jerry met me there. It's one of his rental houses. Matt was different
from the beginning. He was a nice guy. He knew everything that
was to be known about, what his job was for,
and what it was about, and what he was using. I liked him. Jerry took me to
the side of the house where the crawlspace
opening was. And I remember the crawlspace
opening was about two feet by a foot and a half,
so it's pretty small. And I actually had to
throw my flashlight, throw my hat in,
and actually look like I was diving in a
pool to get into the house. You know, the crazy thing was
Jerry sat there and watched me the whole time. I crawled under anywhere from
five to seven houses a day. I never had a customer watch me. But he was there and
in fact, I remember thinking man, if you'd
quit watching me, I'd get done with
this a lot quicker. [ominous music] Crawled under that
first support beam, was making my way to
the second support beam. And when I got ready crawl
into that second support beam, I was at the point at
which, I came in contact with 110 bolt wire. [zapping sound] That's when things
start to go crazy. That's when I heard that
terrible sound of him getting electrocuted. [ominous music] Every muscle in my body was
contracting, and pulsating, and just throbbing. There was tremendous
heat, like almost as if my body was on fire. The heat, electricity,
I felt like, was actually burning my insides. I thought this is it. This is the end. This is how I will die. [zapping sound] [acoustic guitar playing] I live in White
Pine, Tennessee. I was born and raised
there all my life. So I was a package
delivery driver at UPS, with a farm on the side. I had an online business,
selling farm pet supplies. And we had a little,
local store, pet store. Family was important, but it
was way back from making bucks. It was the whole thing. It's make as much
money as you can. You know, every dad with most
toys is the one that won. [cars driving by] [instrumental music] And we brought it back home,
which was nothing unusual. We never ate out. And we were constantly
eating at the house where I could work at
the same time that I eat. I put some cheese on
it from the house, and was running up orders, you
know, while I eat the chili. [ominous music] I don't even think
I got finished with my little bowl of chili
until I started getting sick. I threw up every thing that
you could possibly throw up to the point of what we used
to call dry heaves, and sweat. Lord, I couldn't have
jumped in a tub of water and be any wetter. [ominous music] It was hurting down my arm,
in between my shoulders. But I attributed
that to, you know, it must be muscle spasms
from throwing up so much. After about two hours of
it, I went down the hall and woke my wife. I remember even
telling her, you know, I need to get to the hospital. Anyway, I've gotten sick of
either the chili or the cheese. And she looked at me
and said, no, you're having a heart attack. [ominous music] The symptoms in his arm and
across his back, him nauseated, everything just said,
screamed heart attack. And I said we need to go now. So I ran into the kitchen,
and I got an aspirin and made him chew an aspirin. And then, off we went
to the emergency room. Which even then, I
argued and said no, I'm not having a heart attack. You know, just cause
you're a cardiac nurse, don't mean we're all
having heart attacks. I'm just sick. [ominous music] He looked me up
to an EKG machine, and he never said a word. He just-- he had this
funny look on his face. And Denise jerks
it from his hands, and she gets the same
look on her face. And I thought, crap, I'm
having a heart attack. It was a very long segment of
his right coronary artery that was blocked. So I'm really
terrified at this point. I mean, I was sitting there, the
only thing I could think to do was pray. I never did pray to come
back, didn't pray to live. I just prayed that I'd die with
a smile, if I was going to die. And I prayed that
I'd be forgiven. [ominous music] The weight of my body was
right on the center point of the back of my neck. My mouth was
filling with fluids. And I was starting to choke. [ominous music] And at some point, and
I truly don't remember whether the paramedics
were there or not, I realized that if they
didn't get me out pretty soon, my neck was going to snap. So I hollered to
whoever was around me, you have about 30 seconds
because I know that my neck is going to snap. It was just like magic. The door opened up. Some hands grabbed me and they
slid me out into the roadway. [ominous music] As soon as they slid
me into the ambulance, I knew that every chance I had
of getting my dog was gone. And I just said
please, dear god, you are the only thing
at this point that can take care of my dog. [ominous music] She had what's called a
pulmonary contusion, which means that there was blood
in the alveoli, the air sacs, and the lungs themselves. When she got to the
emergency department, she had started having
trouble breathing. Her oxygen saturations
or her ability to oxygenate
deteriorated as her lungs filled up with blood, to the
point where her condition had become life threatening. I felt like I was
in one of those TV movies, those medical
emergency movies, because everybody seemed
to be in such chaos. But I heard my son's voice,
and I just felt such relief because I knew that
family was there. [ominous music] People with pre-existing
lung disease, very often, can deteriorate into what's
called adult respiratory distress syndrome or ARDS, which
has a very high mortality rate. And that was what we suspected
was going to happen with Dea. [ominous music] The trauma surgeon that
was taking care of her felt that we needed to put
a breathing tube in for her, and put her on the ventilator. [ominous music] We're about 15 minutes
away from Colorado Springs. Brendan calls, and
he says they're going to have to put her under. I said, what do you mean. And he said they have to
put her under and put her on a respirator. And from what the doctor says,
it's a life or death situation. And I asked him, couldn't
they wait till we get there. And he says no. So I said just tell
her we love her, and we'll be there
as soon as we can. [ominous music] All of a sudden,
all I could see was the color orange
and the color blue. And I thought,
well, this is weird. Then I started to
experience pain. [ominous music] I felt as if somebody had
picked me up by my ankles and used me as a baseball
bat, and slammed me on a cement surface. And I remember screaming
with all my might. And the pain, at that
point, was so intense. I totally blacked out. EKG MONITOR BEEPING [flatlining beep] [ominous music] [weird ticking sound] And I looked down. And as I looked
down, that's when I realized I didn't have a body. And all of a sudden, I am in
this totally fantastic saffron, gold, yellow color. The heat, electricity,
I felt like, was actually burning my insides. I thought this is it. This is the end. This is how I will die. [ominous music] That's when I heard that
terrible sound of him getting electrocuted. He was, I think, about 16
feet away with his face down. I thought he was dead. It was a pain like I've
never experienced before. And my head was like a
basketball being dribbled real low to the ground, like
do-ga, do-ga, do-ga, do-ga. My teeth were like a wind-up
set of chatter teeth. You know, you wind them up,
and chk-chk-chk, your teeth are chattering.
That's what my teeth were doing. In the midst of everything
that was taking place, I do remember being scared. And I think my fear was
probably more for my family than it was for me because
I knew that they were going to experience the pain of losing
someone that they loved dearly. I did feel, I did sense
that my heart was stopping, that it stopped. But it was in that moment
that I was taken from it, and actually allowed
just to witness it from outside of my body. I began to realize
that this is the end. This is it. This is that dying experience. I've always wondered how
is it going to happen. Well, here it goes. [ekg monitor beeping] [flatlining beep] [weird ticking sound] At that point is when everything
went to the supernatural. [ominous music] [ekg monitor beeping] So I'm really
terrified at this point. I mean, I was sitting there,
the only thing I can think to do was pray. [ominous music] They go in and put a
balloon in the coronary artery to flatten the plaque against
the coronary artery wall so blood is restored to
that part of the heart. You know, one
minute I'm dressed. Next minute, I'm not. And then they shave
off your groin area. You can't have any
body hair around you groin area because that's where
they're going to go in at. The little, old
lady come by, and I can't remember what they said
her name, Grace or something. She takes her hand and she rubs. And she goes, oh,
that's not good. So she takes her
razor and she shaves. [laughing] She goes-- [blowing sound] --and she shaves. She looks back,
and I'm grinning, thinking this is the
funniest thing I've ever saw. But I'm still hurting, I
still thought it was funny. And I'm thinking,
god, don't laugh. She'll castrate you. [laughing] [ominous music] DENISE: His heart
rate was going down and his blood pressure
was going down. And at that time, I did not
know if he would make it or not. And it really worried me. It really did. And it was cold. God, it was ever, I mean, it was
just like being in an ice box. And every breath seemed like it
just took that much more energy to get. [ominous music] [ekg monitor beeping] I didn't feel great,
but I felt good. You know, pain relieved. I'm still freezing my butt off. But then it collapsed. And when it collapsed, it
was just like getting hit with a sledgehammer. [slamming sound] [ominous music] He was going Anthony,
hang with me, buddy. Anthony, buddy, hang with me. But every time, he
would say it, it sounded like he
was backing away. [ominous music] And then all of a sudden, I
couldn't hear him anymore. [ekg monitor beeping] [flatlining beep] [weird ticking sound] And that's when I realized
that the reason I couldn't get my breath is I was dead. I quit watching the monitors. I looked at him and
I started praying. It's all you can do. And I looked down. And as I looked
down, that's when I realized I didn't have a body. And all of a sudden, I am in
this totally fantastic saffron, gold, yellow color. [grim music] [weird ticking sound] [somber music] Thing that really
worried me is she's got scar tissue on her
lungs, and I knew about that. And so I knew, if she
was to be injured, the lungs were the worst
place for her to be injured. I was starting to realize
that the colors were changing. The first color I remember
kind of washing over me was this beautiful magenta. And I was so taken
with how deep and rich and full this color was. And at some point, it was almost
like I was on a little mini-- or my mind was on a
little mini roller coaster because all of a
sudden, I would get whooshed through another color. I thought I was hearing music. And sure enough, the
music got closer. The sounds got clearer. And the sounds and the
music just kind of converged together, and it was absolutely,
phenomenally beautiful. [ominous music] Their brain dies after about
four minutes with no oxygen. Lots of other tissue in the
body can survive without oxygen for long periods of time. But the brain only has
about four minutes. [weird ticking sound] I seem to have
questions inside myself. But every time there
would be a question, it's as if some hand would
brush the side of my face. Only there was no face, it was
brushing the side of my soul. I became totally
relaxed, at this point. I knew that I was definitely
somewhere else, yet, I was still me. And I was very much
at home with this. And all of a sudden, I
realized that where I was, I was in the presence of God. [somber music] When that happened to me, all
the colors just faded away. And all of a sudden, I
was out in the cosmos. I saw the stars. I saw the universe. I saw the past, I saw the
present, and I saw the future. But I saw it all at once. It was like I understood. And it was so beautiful. This is that dying experience. I've always wondered
how is it going happen. Well, here it goes. [ominous music] [weird ticking sound] I experienced the very real
plane of a 39-year long life movie being played, where I
was allowed to literally see my life flash before my eyes. I saw image after image. And what I saw was
the faces of people that I had the opportunity to
know and have relationships with over the years. But what I vividly remember
is at the end of this movie, I remember seeing the face
of my wife and my three kids. And one of the reasons
I exist is to be a dad and be a husband to my family. [bell tolling] [grim music] [weird ticking sound] I knew I had to get to Matt. I was the only hope he had. And I slammed on that deck. [tapping music] And I just dove
through that hole to try to get there
as quick as I could. As I'm experiencing
the movie, I'm actually experiencing the
very real presence of God. It happened through
the form of a-- through light. It happened through the
form of actually hearing my name actually being called. That light was all encompassing. It was surrounding me. It was basically, at that
point, the essence of who I was, was that light, as I'm
moving, if you will, almost closer to the light. I heard god literally
speak my name. Imagine if thunder could speak,
if when you heard thunder, it actually was
speaking your name. It was in that
moment that I knew that God was very real and
very in that moment for me. [ominous music] And that's when I realized
that the reason I couldn't get my breath is I was dead. [weird ticking sound] [grim music] And then all of a sudden, I've
seen, at the speed of light, everything thought
that I've ever had, and everything that
could have done and didn't, everything that
I said that I shouldn't, and everything that I didn't
say that I should have. It's all traveling
at the speed of light but it's all slow enough to
digest each and every second. It wasn't like any type of slide
show, home movie, anything. This was like you were
actually reliving it, only it's like that moment is
inside of you all over again. A lot of the stuff
that I thought was OK, because everybody does it,
suddenly didn't look so OK. And I thought I'm going to hell. And I was terrified. This is a point in time
that I'm leaving my body. [ominous music] When I looked back
at my body, it could have been anybody's body. I felt no connection. I watched one of the
nurses come running in, try to help the doctor
and the other nurse. I saw that from actually being
above, not just sitting up, but being above the whole thing. And my wife was lined
up to the far left. And I could see the person
standing beside her, talking to her,
trying to console her. And I could see the worry
and turmoil on her face. It's a very critical
time at that point, making sure that, you know,
you get that artery back open. [weird ticking sound] [somber music] They put him in the
coronary artery wall to hold the coronary
artery wall open. Anthony had such a long
blockage in his coronary artery that they had put
two end to end. The next thing I saw was just
the whole room illuminated. [grim music] It was a light that was
filled with love, peace, joy, acceptance. It seemed like everything,
every flaw that I had, had been corrected. And there was really
nothing I wanted for. I was at peace, content. When I'm trying to communicate
to my wife, and you know, I'm trying to tell her
that I'm better than great, I am excellent, I am perfect
for the first time in my life, not to cry, not to
worry, not to be sad. But no matter how hard I tried
to get my point across to her, I couldn't. [ominous music] And all of a sudden, I
realized that where I was, I was in the presence of God. [somber music] [weird ticking sound] At some point, and I don't
know when this happened, but I felt a coming
back into myself. [flatlining beep] [ekg monitor beeping] I wanted to go back. I tried to turn
my mind or my soul or my being around to go back. I desperately wanted to go
back to where I had just been. But I felt like I
hit a cement wall. [somber music] When Brendan pulled
that curtain back and I saw her there with
all the tubes out of her, I knew how serious it was. We were giving her
pulmonary medications through the
endotracheal tube that keep the airways opened up. But there aren't any magic
medicines to fix the issue. It's a matter of trying to
keep her stable until her lungs start doing the
work on their own. And I remember Dr. Leininger
saying that now is just out of our hands. It was just a matter of watching
and waiting, and letting God decide what he was
going to do with her. [ominous music] About 10 o'clock that night,
I found out nobody had the dog. I said we have to go. We have to go find the dog. And they said it's night. It's dark. The dog is black. It's the side of the highway
in the middle of nowhere. I said we have to go. We have to go. [somber music] We're looking all up
behind the accident site. And I mean, we searched
and we screamed, and I couldn't talk anymore. And I said, Lord, I
said if Dea wakes up and I don't have this dog, I
said, I don't know what she's going to do. She won't make it. And so I kind of shook my
fists at God, and said, you got to help
me find this dog. And I drove right down the
hill, and there he was. And he came to me. And it was just one of the small
miracles of the whole thing that happened. [somber music] I looked up, and I saw what
was a figure standing over me. I didn't realize
this was a figure. I didn't realize it was human. I had lost concept of
what being human was, or what a human body was. And it wasn't until he smiled
that I recognized my son. It was almost as if my mind was
one of these little flip toys. And it just went ching,
ching, ching, ching, boom. And he squeezed my hand,
and he said I love you, mom. And that's when being human
and occupying this human body of ours just came
flooding back into me. [grim music] As I move in, if you will,
almost closer to the light, I heard God literally
speak my name. [ominous music] [weird ticking sound] When I saw the encompassing
light, when I heard my name being called
by this powerful voice, that's when everything stops. [ominous music] [ekg monitor beeping] [zipping noise] [creepy wood shifting sound] The wire was hanging in
the middle of his back. And I just reached
and got the pipe, and brought it up, pushed
the wire out the way. [ominous music] I remember at that point being
pushed over onto my right hand shoulder. And I looked, and I saw the face
of Mr. Jerry Oswald, the man who owned the house. Said, how'd you
get here so quick? I said man, I don't know. I really don't. I was overcome by an
appreciation for him, appreciation for what God had
done, what had taken place. There's no way he could have
gotten in the crawlspace in that amount of time,
just based on his ability, his physical ability
at that time. We crawled out from
under the house together, got out from under
it, and remember telling him I need help. My body's hurt. Call 911. [somber music] They were just
astonished that I was-- number 1, I was alive. And number 2, that
there was no long term, lasting side effects. Long term exposure to
electricity like that can often cause neurological
damage, can often cause cardiological
damage to your heart. And every one of
them, to the person, said you obviously have a reason
and a purpose for being here because you should be dead. [grim music] There was really
nothing I wanted for. I was at peace, content. [grim music] [weird ticking sound] I was above the doctors
at that point in time. I really don't think that I made
the conscious decision to come back, although I was
thinking, you know, I got a wife and kids. And it would sound better
if I said, you know, oh, I knew I had a wife and
children I had to come back to. But really, I don't
think I had a whole lot to say in the matter. But I do remember looking down,
and I thought, if I do go back, this is going to hurt like hell. It wasn't like there was
any type of motion at all. I mean it-- you're here,
and bam, you're there. You know, it's just like
getting hit with a ton of lead. [ominous music] [flatlining sound] [ekg monitor beeping] [snickering] The first thing I remembered
when opened my eyes was that actually that I had
both my requests filled. And I had been forgiven. And I requested that I not die
without a smile on my face. And I was smiling
when I went out, and I was smiling
when I come back. Second thought was oh,
dear god, I'm in pain. But I knew I was
supposed to fight. I mean, I knew that. I think we're all supposed to
fight with everything we have, and not make the decision
on when it's time to go. [ominous music] The whole experience
was very, very surreal because, in that moment where
my body was literally convulsing with pain, I really would
equate it to almost like a hell experience. But in that in that moment
of experiencing hell, I was literally experiencing
heaven in a very real way. The significance of
that moment for me was that I needed to be reminded
that God hadn't forgotten me. And went to college,
got a Masters, did all the stuff I
was supposed to do. And here I am, crawling under
houses, looking for insects. This is not what I felt
like I was created for. And I need to be reminded that
my life does have purpose. Now, it's not wrapped
up in what I do. It's wrapped up in who I am. [somber music] I sent a bug man
down in that hole, and pulled a preacher out. [somber music] I don't fear death. I've been to the edge. And I've tasted, and
I've experienced it. I've been reluctant to change
light bulbs since then. But there's-- what's on the
other side of dying, for me, is so much greater than
what I live for that now, I don't fear death. [grim music] [beeping sound] And it was then I realized
that all of the plaques, and all the ad boys, and all of
the money, and all of the toys, and all that time that I'd
spent being in a hurry, all that was for nothing. It wouldn't buy
me another second. And it sure didn't ease my pain,
and it didn't help my passing. You know what, my
relationship with my wife, with my daughters, with
my parents, my friends, those were things
that really matter. When Anthony first came back,
and he was out of the sedation, he said you know,
he said, I love you. He said, and you know, thank
you for what you did for me and getting me to the
hospital as soon as you did. [melancholic music] Why come back to
this, I don't know. It could be that there is
something it could be that can help somebody, somehow. And you know, like
I write a blog. It's almost become
like a diary now. There are some doctors and some
nurses who say that they read it every night, and it's helped
them with their patients. And it's not well written. I mean, it's--
god, it's horrible. I talk horrible. I write horrible. But it comes from the heart. That could be the reason. [acoustic guitar playing] What I've told Denise,
and I've told my children, too, you know, if the time
comes, and it will come, be it cancer or
rake, you never know. But it comes for all of us. And when it does,
I don't want her be sad because I haven't died. I've actually came alive. [somber music] One of the first
things that they did was, of course, tell me
that my dog had been found. That Reebok was alive. He was about two
feet off the roadway. My sister knew, the minute
they grabbed a hold of the dog and got him in the car, that
she knew I was going to live. The dog became
important to all of us. And we were all grateful, the
next morning, when we found out that her dog had been found. My sister had gone over
to the parking garage where the dogs were
in the car, and had taken Reebok out of the car. She stuck his forearm out
and waved it back and forth. So from my hospital bed, I
could look out the window, and I could see my dog. And of course, as soon
as I saw that he was OK, I was crying and
couldn't tell anybody because I couldn't talk. So I just laid there and cried. I could see, from 50 yards
away, that she recognized. She was happy to see the
dog than me, I think. [grim music] I felt as if my whole
soul had been splayed open. Very profound experience, to
say the least, for somebody who prayed occasionally. And now, I feel like every
minute of my life is a prayer. And I'm so blessed to have
had the experience that I did. So did it change my life? Absolutely. I know that the person I
used to be is still there, but I truly feel like Dea died. I still have her memories. I still have her thoughts. I still have some
of her bad habits. But I'm a different person. And I've never known
such happiness. I want other people to know
that there really is something beyond what we have here. There really is a
beyond and back.
