Finding Love In Japan | 101 East

love makes the world go round except it seems in Japan here romance is on the rocks a third of young Japanese have never been in a relationship and many say they don't want one now the government is playing cupid to try and increase the nation's plummeting birthrate I'm Steve Chow on this episode of 101 East we ask can love find a way in desperate and dateless Japan women often say humour is something they look for in a man so you'd think a comedian would be a hit with the ladies but stand-up duo K go Masayoshi and you Toninho say they both struggle to fall in love I know almost really dance it do you know what women find funny man interesting but it rarely goes further than that you need to be more manly they want gentlemen not Jokers the comics turn a routine in this Tokyo at our technical Nicola continue from Zynga new engine for this only guy's muscle and some of their gags revolve around being a herbivore man it's a Japanese buzz word to describe shy young men who show no interest in chasing romance why do you both see yourself as herbivore many a Bakunin car each day I'm 22 years old and I haven't even been on one date it don't it's not that okay knee for me I can talk to girls but when I'm alone with them I feel they will hate me if I kiss or hug them so instead of chasing a girlfriend Kegel gets his female interaction from a cafe where waitresses dressed as maids worn over customers these famous diners found across Japan its uses first time they were caught of it Hey ah look what's on the height Dakota no nobody okay go and user a less socially withdrawn than other herbivore men in today's Japan many per the doorman don't leave their rooms these comedians are more outgoing but they are still more comfortable with superficial interactions they're docile at all so none of our coming here is more exciting than a date on a date you have to focus on the girl and impress them here I have fun the girls are quirky and whatever you say or do here the may to excess you however cago wants me to make the one dream girl he'd love to have a real relationship with me English so I visit his bachelor pad her name is Nana say national a pop idol with Japanese Dan Nagi Sawa 46 what makes her so perfect the ladder quit her voice the way she talks and effort she puts into performing if there's a girl better than an SI I would date her but that's impossible to imagine I only fantasize about her so a couch guy needs a talking on desk at all one time I introduced myself to Nana say at an event a month later I met her again and she still remember my name I reacted wow you still remember me it's one of his happiest memories other memories are not cago says he was dumped by his first high-school sweetheart and has lost all trust in real girls I get rejected all the time I mean why do you fear rejection so much awkward otaku nation so no kids at schools good night I don't have a strong heart and possible I want to live a life with less hurt I want 100% assurance that I won't be rejected if I go out with a goal I'm mentally weak if real relationships have an emotional cost Kay goes relationship with pop idols has a financial one he spends three thousand dollars a year on merchandise and attending shows featuring young girl bands personals I get a nervous excitement because it's rare to have girls so beautiful come close to me uh no Iman Oh Joseph normal girls are too rowdy idols have an x-factor and like everybody luckily Kay go also makes money working as a photographer at these events for many fans getting a picture with an idol is as fun as watching them perform there's a time limit to talk with the girls so the queue up for photos again and again some file them away by date the idols are thankful without them they can't be on stage I notice connected I think idols suit those who don't have experience with girls they can pay and spend time with them to satisfy themselves to them it's a relationship the world of manufactured relationships is a step away from real life but some take it even further hiroyuki Nomura is in his 50s but there is a girl in his life who makes him feel young again but each month I Sony Oh guys a coke dealer model she's the first girl I welcomed into my life if not for her I wouldn't have my current friends or much fun that's why TC especially yes tsa isn't your average girl she's 25 kilograms of silicon in station your face at first she was just a doll I bought from a store but I began to feel affection for her she's not a girlfriend or a daughter but she says very important t.t se is not his only object of affection Hiroyuki used to love buying motorbikes now his passion is collecting doll characters from his favorite animation shows la mom ultimate Aquanaut when you buy the doll the face is plain I have to paint the eyes to give them a soul in character Courtois problem juvenile get a 1-up when you dress her comb her hair it feels as though a soul dwells in her and she's alive Hiroyuki says living with these seventeen dollars is more exciting than his job as a window cleaner Jamuna what da da capo Chiho I don't know what this is not a power relationship I think people choose dolls because reality is harsh Hiroyuki takes his dolls on holidays around Japan with other collectors he hopes by being public it dispels the image of dolphins as weird recluses facial a bubble or model before my collection group they felt like a family with so many of them it feels like they're an idol group and I'm their manager and photographer it doesn t know people epi punished oh god it makes me happy when people come and say I like your dog I like taking long trips in my car to see the reactions of people most people are generally nice and I only get mean messages online what's hard to ignore is their girlish appearance it makes me wonder if Japan creates unrealistic expectations of women through dolls idols and maid cafes caution or pushy do you know the dolls are young because he meets the public's demand their school age because animation films wouldn't sell if characters were in the 30s it could be the reason why men go for idol groups I think many men are disappointed by real women like have you been in a relationship with a human oh yeah theory Morimoto no I didn't like something that complicated I couldn't get myself interested in pouring my energy into a relationship the dolls have a healing quality and make me smile when I come home but men like Hiroyuki who live in a fantasy world are often blamed for Japan's loyal marriage and birth rates kick ball I'm not looking for a real partner because lots of people are unhappy after getting married I think you should decide how to live your life I don't care about the pressure to get married in Japan because if you care you won't enjoy life with some men opting out of committed relationships where does that lead Japan's women increasingly they're joining Japan's corporate world but instead of bringing more men and women together it seems to be doing the opposite so same model same urges oil filter sources now since women are working alongside men they've become rivals that leads to less opportunity of a relationship both men and women are preoccupied with climbing the ladder and it leads to less marriages sakura works in television production she says most of her relationships have been short-lived affairs and dating is difficult for japan's new wave of ambitious women no one is near someone will crush got a new home they were in Japan the men used to make the first move pay for dates and initiate everything but now Japan's in bad economic shape lots of men struggle to find jobs and have no confidence while many women want marriage and children men only think of those ideas once their job is secure Sakura says she really wants to get married land and water I've known two or three men and I thought I'm going to get married after 2 or 3 years but after that time I'm not married you know all this time I thought I knew the right man for me in the end I was wrong Sakura is not alone being alone only 1/3 of young Japanese are in relationships the young women it used to be a big decision to choose a wedding dress now the decision is whether to choose a partner at all love and marriage a falling out of fashion recently elected governor of Tokyo Yuriko quicky headed up the Japanese government's push to boost marriage rates the former defense minister says the marriage drought and the consequent falling birthrate a mashes of national security as serious as tensions in the South China Sea was a the population tricked down it is so hard to to secure the society and to to secure for instance Islands near the you know East Sea and so forth but currently I'm presiding parliamentary group too intense or two to support the young people to get to marry more easily and more happily and because the young people have less opportunity to meet their future partner so that's why matchmaking comes in that's right that's right the declining population is so severe in local cities for instance in shopping streets you can find the shuttered stores well in order to to vitalize the local community so this is why the local cities are really a challenging keep on challenging for this much making events in order to to secure the society the dying local cities the minister is talking about stretch across rural Japan making them increasingly lonely places to be 65,000 towns have seen a rapid decline in their population one of them is o-tar for Kazuki Tatsumi it's the perfect place to play the blues there are a few residents to complain about the noise there's only two thousand eight hundred residents the population has shrunk by almost half in the last two decades with few jobs and industries many families have abandoned Atari for cities so does it pain you to see the town like this well there's now I'm norm cash your mud um a lot of places I used to go to have now disappeared that makes me sad even my old school is gone this is happening in towns across the mountainside people don't really go out or mingle so it's difficult to get married or have fun that's why I need to make the town more lively and young people more active when Kazuki is not playing music he's a matchmaker because he believes love can revitalize rural Japan and save towns like his today Kazuki is hosting an event called let's have a drink together most of the attendees are from Atari and other villages nearby about a hundred people signed up for our event and more than 80 people came so I think it turned out really well I need with government financial assistance rural towns across Japan are now holding similar speed dating events sometimes only a handful of people show up to these events because many are shy about seeking apartment last and why must there our approach is impromptu at our meeting three men and women get to know each other for about 20 minutes and we do three rounds he's developed a yellow card system to keep guests in check hana saku dear oppa tomato juice carotenoid OC dispel for mana your name buddy go Sanka she's like in our muscle it's not easy running dating events some events offer all-you-can-eat buffets so I hear some women sign up for food rather than a partner other events make you feel you must get married there and then some mix 20 and 40 year olds so it looks like parents and kids I think if young people get together love will naturally emerge but could over the outfit Atari's mayor is proud of his beautiful town and wants it to survive closely at all so when the young people organized matchmaking parties we give government money to them we also pay for them to attend matchmaking parties in other cities I know how do we all did that we don't do it the population will drop dramatically and the town will die that's why I have to do something to keep the community alive he first encouraged Kazuki to stop working as the local tax man and pursue matchmaking instead and aw geez on our morale there are we depend on Kazuki's worth - now he always wants to support the community he's a good solver any problem in the town as a young member of the town I hope he gets married himself and has children that will make me happy how does that make you feel hi I'm here a lot I will try my very best because I also want to get married yeah that's right the town matchmaker himself is looking for love Kisuke says he found at once but sadly it ended in divorce while romance can be Rocky Kazuki says he hasn't given up Tony Leggett economic I believe in love because I feel we can't live alone that's how I feel about love myself in order to achieve fulfillment you have to involve other people I feel if we don't have a relationship we don't have a life six hundred thousand couples did tie the knot in Japan last year but the government wants to double that figure by 2020 to do it they are spending thirty million dollars annually on projects that encourage matchmaking and marriage but this approach has its critics especially in these tight economic times how do you justify that 30 million dollar expense well some people criticize it but they this is one of them I mean the effort that a country has to do matchmaking it's a very old-fashioned approach in a very technologically advanced country well because it's people's - people people has to meet each other and get to know each other and to to rule to understand each other well I don't think technology doesn't work so well to get people's they think according to the statistics one-fifth of men Japanese men lost their life without marriage they kept they keep on living alone do you think that's sad I think so can you change your herbivore man with some of these government strategies changing the mind is very important not only that but also we need to give more opportunity for poor young man and woman to have to - to have an opportunity to meet each other but it's a very tiny step but it works I've suggested Kay go and Utah take a tiny step out of their comfort zone so we've organized for our herbivore men to attend a matchmaking event we're over 400 singles are expected to attend they're getting prepared inside the do this heart do this I think you guys need to go back in here and soon we're downtown where style elegance and beauty grace the streets even KOCO likes to see himself as a bit of a trendsetter do you always carry around that woman's handbag this is Joey whatever no this is style this is my favorite bag back all right if you say so at the event participants mate at several restaurants and bars throughout the night when the boys register they're given a map and a schedule their first dates iris an Indian cafe the boys shuffle from table to table and despite my initial fears it's encouraging to see women find them entertaining company more than a your son okay well dr. su you sure Khun Danai Susan got you now sir for your as you'd expect on a first date this moments of awkwardness oh it's all there nothing what nothing remember any muscle did you meet anyone that you felt a connection with yeah more there's a lot of beautiful girls there but if my idol Nana say is at this level then the other girls were down here so there's really no comparison so no my for me no girls met my standards from where I was watching it looked like you were being more entertaining than seducing Hall is heppa for that I think the fact I wanted to entertain comes out instead of satisfying myself I try to make the girls laugh so they won't get so nervous they have one more chance to find love at this Italian restaurant once I'm done one other time ago the boys are more confident but perhaps there are little too candid another kick won again k go opens up about his fear of rejection and two girls try to consoled him but compassion is one thing attraction another after their date the girls tell me K go is not really an option the guy in a white shirt is flirtatious but he has no substance at the end of the night k go remains alone I've watched you tonight you've made a lot of women laugh and you're really quite endearing and charming but what I cannot understand is why do you choose to be a herbivore man it makes absolutely no sense to me thought that they still hunted me no used to this all the girls are friendly and I like them so much but I don't want them to love me it's a waste to love me I'm happy though I have fun tonight but I don't want to hurt people I am someone who likes pop stars is a pretty low form of math anyway I'm fine with a fridge whether it's low self-esteem and confidence or unrealistic expectations it's a recipe for loneliness despite japan's best efforts commitment to lasting relationships is still proving elusive

Channel: Al Jazeera English

Views: 1,842,413

Rating: 4.7851191 out of 5

Keywords: dating, otaku, manga, documentary, full documentary, Asia-Pacific, Al Jazeera English, News, al Jazeera, Government, jazeera, youtube, 101 East, asia, Love, Japan, matchmaking, Current affairs, herbivore men, find love in japan, find your love in japan, 日本人, 日本, find your love, 外国人, 街頭インタビュー, 恋愛, japanese, japanese girls dating, the path to true love, relationships, spirituality, awakening records, maid cafes, dating advice, boyfriend, love in japan, japan al jazeera, al jazeera japan, asian girls

Id: 2XllGh3OExA

Length: 25min 45sec (1545 seconds)

Published: Thu Aug 18 2016

Reddit Comments

[u/Garlicholywater]

The guys that they followed around were delusional and need a mirror... "none of these women meet my standards." They need a smack. These dudes have nothing to do with Japans declining marriage/birth rate. They just have super low self-esteem and are taking themselves out of the game before they even play. I was the same way when I was their age. It would have also been interesting to know these guys opinion on casual sex. Instead of just vaguely addressing love and marriage.

[u/TechnoRaptor]

why is japanese love so fascinating. whenever a doc comes up about it have to indulge. Felt bad for the comedian guys, they are really cool and deserve women.

[u/[deleted]]

So what happened to the comedian wearing the red?

[u/heytrev123]

Why is this video blocked in the U.S.?

[u/nextsgin]

not available for me(USA)

this one works: http://www.aljazeera.com/programmes/101east/

[u/R3dCzar]

They even have to pay people to date, how serious is this problem?!

[u/Venaxibene]

Are there japanese documentaries not from the point of view of outsiders? Because that's all there seems to be.

[u/Mad_Mordenkainen]

The comedian guy in the white shirt was ridiculous. He just needs a bro to talk some sense into him. The guy has standards through the roof. If he dropped the "I'm a herbivore man" meme he could be drowning in pussy.

[u/herecomedatbot]

Can't they just get some immigrants in if they're worried about the birth rate and size of the population? It's not like we have a shortage of people globally. The world doesn't need a lot more people.