Family-ish (Part 4): Fighting FOR Your Family

i love it i love it hey um at the valley of uh at the valley of illah all the israelite soldiers were on one side right and all the philistine soldiers had gathered on the other side and we just kind of see this same ritual playing out every single day really for 40 days is that this giant of a man named goliath he was nine feet tall he would come down into the middle of the valley and he would issue this challenge it was called the the the challenge of champions and essentially he would say this he'd say today i defy the armies of israel today i defy the god of israel send out a man to fight me if he beats me we will all serve you but if we if i beat him you will all serve us that is until a little shepherd boy named david was sent in by his father to um go visit his brothers go check in on his brothers who were israeli soldiers and his dad gave him some bread and cheese david was the original uber eats all right and he he rolls in on day 40 of goliath making the challenge he got the kroger bags in his hand sees his brother as he's coming into camp he hears goliath making the the mocking the boasting he sees all the soldiers shrinking back he sees everybody kind of running away and just hiding their head and he asked this in first samuel 17 verse 26 he says what will be done for the man who kills this philistine and removes this disgrace from israel who is this uncircumcised philistine that he should defy the armies of the living god come on jesus don't you love it when somebody with some backbone walks in the room come on all these trained soldiers saul who stood uh head and shoulders of everybody else the king of israel everybody's shrinking back and this teenager comes in and it's like who's this punk who's it i'll kill him nobody else is gonna do it okay i'll do it but then all of a sudden if you know the story david's brother starts saying like david be quiet man just what are you about like be quiet the other soldiers are like dude just be quiet but david's soul won't be quiet here's what he says in psalm or in verse 29 he says this he says is there not a cause is there not a cost david surveys the landscape he sees the the the the armies of the living god of yahweh god the ones who who stand on the shoulders of the generations who have gone before him who have seen the miracles of god he he looks around and they're all hiding they're all shaking in their boots and the and the enemies of god are gloating are boasting are mocking and david's soul says guys is there nothing worth fighting for come on is this not something worth getting upset about he's like where's all the passion where's the strength where's the fighting and he says is there not a cause and this victory family as we bring our families right into the crosshairs of our focus today is what i believe that the lord wants to say to us i believe that the lord wants us to get these five words deep down in our soul to the point that they would never leave is there not a cause is there not a cause is there anything in this world worth fighting for anymore like actually really worth it i was reading an article this last week and the author was stating out the the obvious he said you know all this canceled culture all the rage everybody's getting offended about everything and here's what he said he said this is a first world problem you understand afghanistan has different issues right now right they're not having the same arguments that we are he said this is what happens to a culture who's lost the plot that when we don't have anything legitimate to be offended about we start making things up to be offended about and here's how i'd say it okay is that we live in a society where people care deeply about things that don't matter and they don't care at all about the things that do matter right come on i see i see men paying more attention to their fantasy football teams than they do their own kids come on i see wives paying more attention to hgtv and chip and joanna than they do their own husbands come on i see more kids playing call of duty than they live on mission come on and everybody's spending more time on instagram than they do on the things that actually matter and what's happening is the families are just drifting families are drifting apart it's like it's like they're just sitting in the middle of the ocean and just that just slow kids hearts are drifting from their parents parents hearts are drifting from the kids marriage couples hearts are drifting from each other right um that so many hearts are just drifting from jesus sexual sin is completely rampant and to that i would say is there not a cause is there is there nothing worth fighting for anymore listen i've seen more families drift apart and break apart in this last season than i have in 15 years of ministry right you know it didn't take me long after getting into ministry to realize that that pastors don't get invited to parties we get invited to car crashes right we we get the call when the cancer comes back we get the call when the family breaks apart and those are the calls that i've been getting those are the emails that i've been getting right i i've sat i've sat across the table i've looked into the eyes of the husbands who don't know what to do because their wives just left i've looked at the desperate wives who are breaking down because their husbands just left i've talked to the parents who who are heartbroken because their children have just completely gone off the radar their hearts are chasing after the world and to that i say is there not a cause and victory family i'm saying this we have got to learn how to fight for the right things once again yo i've i i've been married for almost 20 years talked about that a few a few weeks ago i've got a now 16 year old son who is driving god help us all um i have a 12 year old who's in the middle of all the mess of middle school so you better believe that we have some good arguments in the bowie household all right am i the only one you'll have some you have some good good arguments every once in a while in your household okay but here's what i'd say to that is that we are all used to fighting with our families but here's today what i would call you too is that we need to stop fighting with our family and we need to start fighting for our family and if you need the reminder today your family is worth fighting for come on your vows are worth fighting for your spouse is worth fighting for your purity is worth fighting for your kids are worth fighting for leaving a generational blessing to your children is worth fighting for listen maybe you're here and you're young your parents are worth fighting for your siblings are worth fighting for the example of a godly family to a dark and desperate neighborhood and a co-worker relationships is worth fighting for and we've got to start fighting for the right things again nehemiah says this in nehemiah 4 14. he said i looked and arose and said to the nobles the officials the rest of the people he said don't be afraid of the people who are coming against you remember the lord who's great and awesome and fight for your brothers your sons your daughters your wives and your homes is there not a cause is the family not worth fighting for is it not worth getting something in your soul some passion once again for the things that actually matter and so here's the question obviously if we're not fighting against our family who are we fighting against because there's some fight in you i promise we're just putting it in the wrong place so who are we actually fighting against who are we supposed to be fighting against here's the first one it's the devil come on somebody we're finding the devil you just we see this like on the second page of the bible all right it doesn't take long there in your your one year reading plan you probably did on the first day right we see adam and eve in the garden the enemy comes in the devil comes in tempts eve to eat she does but adam doesn't get off he eats too and then god comes into the chaos and he says hey guys what's going on and then all of a sudden all the fingers start going everywhere it's their fault it's their fault it's adam's fault it's eve's fault in fact it's god's fault because he made eve right and they start blaming everybody adam and eve are at each other's throats but they're not even looking at the one who caused the whole situation the devil right jimmy evans pastor jimmy evans here's what he says this is so good he said if you don't know how to do warfare with the devil he will slither in cause chaos slither back out and you don't even know you've been doubled [Laughter] if we don't acknowledge that the devil is at work in our families he's that we're coming to steal and kill and destroy your marriage your kids listen if you're a kid he's trying to ruin your relationship with your parents he's trying to ruin your relationship with your god he's accusing everybody he's the accuser of the brethren if we don't realize this and acknowledge this we will spend all of our energy fighting the wrong enemy come on we will fight each other and we'll even fight god you'll find yourself sitting back and you'll spend your whole time if if your whole life is complaining to god in prayer you've got the wrong enemy oh god my husband won't do this my kid's doing this and they're doing this and you're not doing that and the devil's just sitting back like i i love this old quote when satan is working double time be in prayer over time because if we don't acknowledge the fact that we have an enemy of our souls then we will spend all of our energy pointing our anger and our aggression at the wrong enemy at the wrong enemy so if we're not fighting against our families who are we fighting against we're fighting against against the devil the second one is we're fighting against the culture listen there's there's a cultural gravity in the world all around us we are we're living in a culture that cares about all the wrong things right we're living in a culture we're full of people who care more about celebrity relationships than their own relationships come on my tmz crew where you at come on we hear more about jlo and ben we're we're tracking more with we're we're checking in on on kim and kanye how they doing we're checking in more on them than we're checking in on our own families come on somebody when it gets quiet you know everybody's like oh yeah yeah oh yeah listen i know more people who spend more of their anger more of their aggression more of their energy trying to fight against waging a war to wear a mask and they so that they don't have to wear a mask in publix then they are using their energy to fight for their families spend all of our energy online well trump's the one who really won and our family's falling apart guys we're fighting the wrong wars here is there not a cause is there not a cause and listen if there ever was a time we don't live it any anymore where the culture does not reinforce the kingdom and so we cannot take our clues from the culture around us we have to take our clues on how to live from the kingdom all right because the culture does not value the ideas in in the heart of the kingdom and so we live in a world that doesn't value value vowels right and so marriage is take it or leave it marriage is low i don't feel like i love you anymore so i guess we're supposed to get a divorce right listen you have a god who doesn't care what the culture says because culture changes but god doesn't right and the problem is i even hear christians buying into this and i hear christians saying things like well you know like i don't know pastor like maybe we shouldn't have gotten married to begin with i don't know maybe i feel i feel like god's telling me i need to leave my family and go marry that woman you think i'm joking i get these conversations i'm like really really when did the devil tell you that well we'll just have to wait and see no we don't because the word of god is the will of god and so we already know how god feels about this all right uh malachi 2 guard your heart remain loyal to the wife of your youth come on for i hate divorce some of you are like i don't i don't know maybe i need to hear maybe god's gonna tell me for i hate divorce did you hear him i'm gonna say it again for i hate divorce says the lord the god of israel to divorce your wife is to overwhelm her with cruelty and who said this one the lord of heaven's armies sometimes god has to remind you who's actually in charge so guard your heart do not be unfaithful to your wife listen this this was a culture where women had no rights and so they couldn't divorce their husbands but their husbands could divorce them and so we live in a different culture now and so this applies to you ladies as well you didn't get it out you didn't get it out here's what i'm saying god hates divorce but our culture doesn't and so we have to avoid that gravity we can't take our clues from the culture anymore we have to take our clues from the kingdom and so if we're if we're not fighting against our families who are we fighting against we're fighting against the devil we're fighting against the culture and we're also fighting against our sinful nature listen i've got news for you just in case you didn't know this the father did not send jesus into the world because we were great people jesus did not walk around expounding on the the fundamental goodness of humanity no man we are loved but we are wicked come on here's what jesus says these are red letters mark 7. he says for from within everybody say within out of a person's heart come evil thoughts sexual immorality theft murder adultery greed wickedness deceit lustful desires envy slander pride and foolishness all these vowel things come from within they are what defile you these are not listen leave that up there for a second these are not things that the devil made you do come on somebody yes we do have an enemy called the devil but if you're if you follow christ he cannot make you do anything he can tempt you away lust you away offend you away accuse you away but listen he can't make you do it here's what he does he knows what you want to do offers you a carrot and you gladly bite that's what happens and then we blame the devil when we're the ones who did it listen there is a sinful nature in me and there is a sinful nature in you that we have to allow jesus christ to come in and transform us to be born again and become a new person listen our sinful nature cannot be changed it has to be crucified with christ so we can be born again and walk out in newness of life and our chief sin is idolatry if you ever wonder what's the number one sin of humanity it's idolatry here's what the dollar tree is idolatry is wanting pleasure and freedom on my own rules idolatry is saying i call the shots you wanna know why because i'm god that's what idolatry is yeah sure we make idols of other things but really that's because we're our own idol and i sit on the throne of my own life right this this is why sexual identity is all over the place right now this is why same-sex stuff is all over the place right now why because we call our own shots god that stuff's old it's outdated it doesn't fit the culture because now i'm god and i decide what i want to do you want to know where you see idolatry the most on the interstate i am the king of this and all of you are peasants all of you are in my way all of you are just annoying my life this entire road is about me you ever see road rage that's idolatry because i am better than you are get out of my way and guess what we see the same thing in marriage see the same thing in family husbands and wives say i know that i'm supposed to keep my vows i don't want to anymore that's idolatry we say hey i know the right thing to do i'm not going to do that that's idolatry i'm god and jesus christ is the only one who can set us free from that the only one and what all this has produced all this the the attacks of the enemy the culture subtly dissolving family our sinful nature at war with everyone it's produced i don't have a better word for it than adrift it's produced this drift where the love of many is growing cold and in married couples i see them drifting apart i see us drifting from god i see kids drifting off i see parents drifting off i see everybody just kind of doing their own thing because this is what i want to do and so there are those who are drifting but what gets me is i see the families who are just letting it happen we're just watching it happen right where where where mom and dad are watching their kids drift and or we're watching a spouse drift and we're embarrassed about it come on somebody so we don't say anything about it and we just privately hope it just works out and then i get the call and it's all falling apart because yeah well this thing happened five years ago and we just kind of tried is there not a cause is the family not worth fighting for anymore let me tell you it is i know i know i know i know there are a thousand different situations i know they're the circumstances i know maybe you're the one you're the one who's watching that person drift and you've been fighting and fighting and now you're exhausted i know some of you you're the one who's drifting and you just got dragged in here with your spouse i know some of you drifted and now there's a fracture now you just feel guilt and condemnation i know there's others of you that you've already left a toxic broken a fair ridden physically abusive relationship and i'm not telling you to get back into that but what i am saying is this that we need to listen to what god is saying today i know it takes two to make a thing go right i know that i know that i know that but what i'm also saying is this is that some of us have resigned ourselves to a passionless loveless fractured family and we just say well i guess that's how it is and maybe you're sitting now i felt like the lord wanted me to say this maybe you're sitting next to each other today but you couldn't be further apart i'm closer to you than your spouse is and you're six inches apart right now and what i'm saying is this it is time to fight for our families again [Applause] [Music] you cannot control that person but you cannot passively sit back and watch them drift into the gray you can refuse to not let them go without a fight for their soul and a fight for this family and here's what i'm saying i cannot want your family to thrive more than you do because i sit in rooms and i look at husbands and wives and you're like this and she's like this and i'm like listen guys i want you to succeed more than y'all do get your fight back get your fight back so listen some of you are single today put this in your quiver all right cause you're gonna need it some of y'all hurt some of you wounded some of you just been abused in your soul i pray the lord would heal you but what i'm saying is this is that even though there are many of us today who do not believe that a healthy life-giving thriving successful love-filled family is possible here's what i'm going to say what's impossible with man come on somebody it's possible with god so here's the question how do we fight the good fight how do we fight the good fight how do we fight the good fight here's the first thing we got to dive into this how do we fight for our families very simply it starts with me and jesus it does now i know you're like oh we're in church all right yeah we are in church and so i'm going to tell you the truth because whenever i sit down with somebody who's having marriage issues i always give them the i always say this first right off the bat i say hey i know every everything inside you wants to go run and try and fix your family but before you try and run and go fix your family the first thing you need to do is go and fix you and jesus before you try and fix your family you got to fix you and jesus in fact here's how i say it okay is that the best way to fight for my family is to surrender to jesus the best way to fight is to surrender and because here's what happens too many people try and fix their families when their hearts are still jacked up and this is usually why reconciliation doesn't work because you go back and you try and do it in your own strength you're like is this round two of the same fight right except now i'm gonna try right and so you do it for like a week you do it for for two weeks but then the old you comes back out right and so you used to cuss her out then you do it again see i knew i knew here we go again right it all falls apart she used to hit him when she got angry now she does it again used to be critical used to be nagging you used to be nitpicking you do it again you do it again you do it again you used to do it you did it again why because my heart's so jacked up so listen before i try and fix my family i need to fix my heart that's how this thing works and i'm going to give you the secret for every single healthy family here's the here's the secret to every single healthy family first john 4 19. we love each other because he loved us first that is if you want to know the secret you wanna know how a family works you wanna know how to have a healthy family first john 4 19. we love each other because he loves us first listen because i cannot give what i do not have and what our families need is the love of jesus christ right and so what what is the love of jesus it's patient it's kind it's good it's full of self-control it doesn't envy it doesn't boast it's not rude it's not proud like oh i would love to have a relationship like i've been trying to not be proud i've been trying to actually be humble in my arguments will get god's love you spend all your love you're spending all your energy trying to be patient what if you just got god's love and spent time with the patient one and allowed the patient one to rub off on you and here's how it works i said here's how it has to work i get love from him so i can give love to them that's how it works and what it does the love of jesus it makes me a whole person because listen you got to kill jerry maguire you gotta kill him you complete me no we don't no you don't no you don't because if you're an incomplete person and you marry an incomplete person it's gonna be chaos all right i'm just telling you marriage is multiplication right it's not addition and so if you're half a person they're half a person you're gonna be a quarter of a person which means you're gonna be worse off than when you got married because you were trying to leech off of each other and like be a little parasites and i need you to meet this jesus knee in my life and you need me to meet this jesus but what would happen if i actually went to jesus got my needs met then i wouldn't try and put god needs on my family you're not affirming me and you don't appreciate that i work and you don't love me enough no i get love from this is why we say this listen if this is okay this is gonna be okay i get love from him so i can give love to them why do you think that that that remarriages don't work now listen listen listen i know all things are possible god i know the room's full right okay but listen listen that's why 40 there's a 40 chance of divorce right you know for the first marriage guess what there's a 67 chance of divorce for the second marriage and a 74 chance of divorce for the third marriage you want to know what that tells me it wasn't their fault give me grace there is one consistent person in all of your jacked up relationships it's you well all men are dogs no you just keep dating dogs maybe you should look at your selection process listen if i get love from him then i can give love to them if you want to know how a marriage works how a healthy family happens it's because i get love from him and i give love to them here's how i'd say listen is that the best marriages the best marriage isn't two people pursuing one another the best marriage begins with two people pursuing jesus [Applause] because when i meet jesus it transforms me it pulls me out of my sinful nature listen you meet jesus you're not gonna be able to stay in an affair hear me if you say i love jesus then you will not be in an affair don't mock god like that because you're not actually you you conceptually love jesus but there's not out you've actually jesus says if you abide in me and i abide in you you'll bear much fruit the fruit that you're gonna bear is not an affair quote me on that and what that means is i've disconnected my life from jesus and i've tried to plant myself in something else and expect to thrive god will not bless an affair if you spend time with christ it will pull you out of your old way of life and i got good news for you you'll actually love it in the moment you dread it but once you step out of the darkness into the light you're like this is what was possible my whole life it pulls me out of my old way it pulls me out of my pride it pulls me out of all the argue and the nitpicking and the critical spirit pulls you out of that to become a life-giving person why because i'm now connected to life and listen this applies to you even if you're the one who hasn't drifted this is what you need to seek jesus first even if you're the one who stayed faithful even if you're the one and you're watching everybody else drift why because listen because some of us have already started to to buy into plan b's we've already given up hope we've uh i guess you know i guess starting to look forward to being single again right we've already we've already given up in our own soul right i want to say it like this i want to say it like this maybe they're the one who had an affair but you're the one who needs to hear the word of the lord you're the one who needs to hear the word of the lord because listen the lord might say hey listen they've already broken covenant you're not leaving them they've already left you listen some of you need to hear that because you're being guilt-tripped by an unfaithful spouse and disdain see you made vows to me they already broke their vows are you hearing me and so the lord might be saying hey they're going to do it again and do it again it's time to leave it's time to make this thing official or the lord might be saying i'm the god of second chances and third chances and fourth chances i'm the god who resurrects dead things and brings them back to life you need to fight for your marriage you need to fight for your children listen they're the ones who are drifting but you're the one who needs to hear the word of the lord because i need to hear how do i need to put one foot in front of the other to move forward in my life so i'm not stuck here 20 years from now and listen this is this is why listen because this is why i even if i'm not the one who's drifting why i got to pursue jesus listen because i'm not just trying to get that person to come back and love me that's very self-centered i want that person to come back and love jesus does that make sense i'm more concerned for their soul than i am for our family and i know this if they get back right with jesus then things if this is okay then this is going to start working out because what i want to do is i want to get in there and make it happen listen especially as a man i i'm great at fixing things listen this is what we do you ever get in a conversation with a man like a woman you're trying to open up your heart he's like well you need to do this you do that you do that and you're like i did i just wanted to share my heart we just fix things i want to fix it with my own strength i want to change you but zechariah here's what the lord says not by my nor by power but by my spirit says the lord almighty some of y'all need to hear this listen not by nitpicking not by a critical spirit come on not by i'm sick and god on you not by you better come to church with me on sunday or else no we can't do it in our own strength it's the lord the lord is the only one who can change the heart we might be able to change some actions but listen we can't change the heart only god can do that and so we gotta we gotta dive head first into jesus fighting fighting for your family begins with fighting on your needs and just saying god is not by my it's not my spirit i can't do this i can't change this you're going to have to be the one who does it but god start in me start in me change me give me your eyes give me your perspective god i want to see my family like you see my family god i want to love my kids like you love my kids i want to love my spouse like you love my spouse i want to love my parents like you love my parents got to awaken my heart and listen if we put our efforts vertically then god will empower us horizontally so that reconciliation will actually be possible and here's the second thing how do we fight for our families we begins with me and jesus the second thing is this we then we fight together we fight together see god told adam and eve right that they were supposed to have dominion right that they were supposed to lock arms and they were supposed to actually uh be fruitful multiply they were the ones who were gonna see god's glory cover the earth like the waters cover the seas but then when the enemy comes in he divides that instead of fighting together they're fighting at each other and what we have to do we have to recapture the vision of what it looks like to lock arms what would it be like just recapture the faith of that recapture the hope of that some of you are sitting next to each other but you're miles apart what would it look like if you left her actually arm in arm fighting against the right enemy recapturing that vision ecclesiastes 4 12 year set at marriages at weddings a person standing alone can be attacked and defeated but two can stand back to back and conquer their three or even better for a triple braided cord is not easily broken listen alone doing this thing alone you're gonna get taken out you and your spouse together is awesome but when you bring jesus in listen you can have dominion you can rule together you can conquer together you're undefeated together and so if you're married here and you've drifted apart it's time to have that conversation you know the conversation i'm talking about it's the elephant in the room it's the one that you both know if we have this conversation it's it's it's going to get heated is there not a cause is there not a cause is it not worth it would you rather eke out a passionless existence or have a flare-up invite jesus right into the middle of it fight against the right enemy so you can leave their locking arms moving forward together in a passion-filled love-filled relationship for the rest of your life it's worth it it's worth it if you are the one who's drifted maybe you're thinking about leaving right now there's somebody here who's thinking about leaving listen the grass is not greener on the other side the grass is greener where you water it and maybe you're looking at that grass it's really green over there let me make you a promise it's astroturf it's all fake it is not real because listen they got issues too and your 40 just turned into 67 so take the low road come on ask for help you don't know how to have the conversation talk to somebody after service how do i have this conversation my heart's drifting choose your vows choose your family choose jesus choose jesus if you are pursuing the one who's drifted let me say this somebody has to start the conversation and here's what i see i see so many so many spouses they'll be like well they're the one who did that so they need to yes they should yes they should but clearly they're not in a place to do that somebody has to go first somebody has to go first and so what you need to do you pray say god how do i do this i'm going to go to jesus first right god how do i do this because i want to fix it and i want to tell them everything they've done wrong i want to get in their face god i don't want to just say what you're saying i want to say it how you're saying it and and and i need to love them the same way that i've been loved but here's what i'm telling you guys it's time to have courage come on shoot your shot come on don't just let them drift into the gray somebody's got to go first listen i don't want the call i don't want the call in six months from now that you've known for the last three years but you never did anything about it because they did it so they should have gone first yes they should have but you're the one who's closer to the lord right now listen if you're if you're in here and you're fighting for your children's heart authenticity goes a long way real conversations go a long way listen your our kids our kids are going through things right now in the world that we're having a hard time with and you actually have some maturity you actually know how to process some things you're talking about 13 year old 14 year old 15 year old right now and they're growing up in this mess listen listen this is not normal just so you all know this this is not how it's always been now it may continue like this and so you need to be ready with this because listen this jesus is going to come back at some point i don't know when it's looking like tomorrow but but listen as parents we have to help our kids process these things your kids are having faith struggles right now because they're glued to social media right there's 168 hours every single week and we try and bring them to church for for two hours and think that's going to fix it listen you have to intentionally engage your kids you have to step in you get them when we don't right and so have the tough conversations be willing to have the conversation ask me like hey where have i gone wrong is there is there anything because listen you might be telling them to do something that you're or not do something that you're totally doing right i know parents are like uh will you talk to my daughter about you know she's like dressing dressing risque right when you're sleeping with your boyfriend you need to talk to your kids for the sake of their own soul because there might be a reason that they're drifting listen if you're a child who's pursuing your family listen i i i know this and i want to talk to you for a second some of you maybe you're even online i know teenagers who come to this church who you're the only one in your family who serves the lord you're the only one in your family who loves god i just want to say this god bless you god bless you god bless you for real and i pray that the lord would give you courage and boldness and wisdom beyond your ears on how to love your family the way you've been loved by the lord and we have faith with you that you will be a change agent in your family and listen wherever you're at here's what we got to do in our families we have to re-establish the right priorities okay listen because fam we just drift it just it just happens okay but here's use use today as a catalyst to say hey um we're we now we're gonna eat dinner together five nights a week it's just what we do now well mom we we always just we just sit in my room and play xbox and i eat dinner that's what we used to do we don't do that anymore here's what we do here's what our family does now you and your spouse you go on one date night a week at least well i don't i don't know how we can afford that make peanut butter and jelly go sit in a park all right it's just what we do now it's just what we do as a family we pray together every night before bed we never done that before it's just what we do now this is who we are all right because what we're going to do is we're going to lock arms and we're going to fight together not at each other with each other at the right enemy so we got to go to jesus first we got to fight together and here's the third thing we got to fight with family with family right if there's one thing that this season has revealed it's that nothing good happens in isolation come on and that's that's why my heart goes to you if you've been online in this entire season listen for the sake of your soul nothing good happens in isolation and you have to intentionally find ways to not be isolated because that's where the drift happens because you're just you're just just the culture you caught up in the culture the cultural drip and listen we're called to fight with family right this is what we talked about the first week spiritual family right these people who who may be blood but they may just be your church family this is your spiritual family that you fight with you fight alongside and our families are always better when we're around other families who love jesus always always always bring your ember into the fire and you'll get hotter bring your family and other families who love jesus and you'll get better so listen i'm not telling you that you need to tell everybody every time that you get an argument okay that's not what i'm talking about but what i am saying is there's such a thing as the principle of the path and your family is on a path and if you can look at your family and say we're not on the right path that's when you pursue jesus you try and lock arms but listen if change isn't happening you need to open up your circle you need to say hey we need help and please do not do it on your five please do it on day five please do it on on week two be like hey we've been trying but it's we just can't get past this and you have to make a decision in your soul i'm not just gonna let us drift off into the gray so don't be embarrassed listen you need to hear this don't be embarrassed everybody has issues come on anybody in here never had a family issue okay all right and listen if you can't resolve it invite others to come and speak into it listen i know there's gonna even if it makes your spouse upset now again i'm not talking about calling your mom we had no argument sex six seconds ago right you know no listen don't call your parents call your spiritual family all right because your parents love you and they're gonna attack you're gonna kill your husband um so here's what you need to do listen you need to get in a small group you do that may be your next step victoryatl.com right we got married small groups right some of you are like hey i'm the only one who's fighting well get in a women's small group getting them in small group for a time for a season until until you can lock arms and willing to step into a married small group um some of you you have the opportunity to talk to a prayer leader here in a few minutes you know at the end of service um the other thing is we've actually created a page on our website full of resources okay it's you write this down victoryatl.com marriagehelp slash marriage help all right and what what is on this page is it's a video from our marriage pastors matt and angel risby um it has the resources that are available right now all the way through you know from like hey we do a monthly um kind of like a live stream thing on facebook um all the way to there's marriage intensive retreats depends on where your marriage is at right now and what sort of help um that you need and so i can't encourage you enough some of y'all need to send that to somebody who's going through some issues right now and here's what i'd say here's here's the last thing is we fight you know um begins with me and jesus we fight together we fight with family and then we fight with prayer that's what we do and so what we're going to do right now we're actually going to do that all right we're going to pray for a few minutes and so here's what i'd ask you to do let's go and stand up to our feet um and this is how we fight our battles okay and so let's bow our heads father i thank you that you care about the family god i thank you that you care about names that you care about individuals that you care about moms and dads and husbands and wives you care about children you care about parents you care about relationships you care about siblings god you care about our souls god you actually care about the things that matter and so help us to be most passionate about the things that matter the most god rescue us out of complacency today and put this in our soul is there not a cause so right now here's what i do i come against condemnation right now i come against a condemnation that says you've wasted too much time that wants to bury you in regret that wants to say hey you've wasted these years you you can never start again there's too much water underneath the bridge right now i come against that condemnation in the name of jesus the there's no better time to start than right now than right now i come against the condemnation that says you are hopeless and that your family is hopeless and right now god i pray for an infusion of hope that says what's impossible with man is possible with god god i come against the condemnation that says your past determines your future and you've made these mistakes in the past and that's just who you are god i thank you that you're the god of new beginnings [Music] and let's say this together come on let's say this together they god start the work in me say it together god start the work in me god i know that we want to run and we don't want to go fix things and we're just angry at stuff we're just we're bitter we're offended some of us are jaded some of us have drifted there's so many things that have happened god starts the work in me what i want to do i want to i want to pray right now some of you just need to say hey i've drifted from god but today i'm coming back home some of you need to say i choose jesus today today i lay down my idolatry i confess that i am not god but i've tried to be god i've tried to get everything on my own terms i've tried to find my own pleasure i've tried to make my own way but god today is bringing me home god today start to work in me and so i want to lead you in a prayer even right now let's pray this together say jesus christ you are the son of god who died on the cross to forgive my sins and make me new and so right now i repent i say i'm sorry i turn from my way in my sin my idolatry i lay it down i lay down the evil i lay down the dark to go your way today i choose jesus jesus christ is my lord and he is my savior i bow my knee to jesus come and make me a new person in jesus name jesus snape god i thank you i thank you for new beginnings god i thank you for making us new people and even right now as the scriptures say we do not wrestle against flesh and blood and what we have to do sometimes listen we have to take our thoughts captive and i want to give us an opportunity to do that what the scriptures actually say is we need to take our wicked thoughts captive and bring them into submission to the obedience of christ you are not captive you're not a prisoner to your thought life jesus christ can be lord over your thoughts as well and so listen some of you are having thoughts of leaving your family submit that just say i take that thought and i submit that to the lordship of jesus jesus now that's your thought i give that to you i put it at the cross some of you are having thoughts of an affair say i take those thoughts sex thoughts of sexual immorality i take those thoughts i give them to jesus some of you feel like you've just been trapped in hopelessness and depression since whatever that event was right now i give those thoughts of depression i give those thoughts a hopelessness and i give them to the cross of christ and right now come come on god come and breathe hope god breathe life god calls it god cause a righteous fight to come up on the inside of us got to fight for the things that actually matter in fact i want to just say this some of you say some of you need to say this message is still resonating with me and you just need to make a statement if you say today i'm going to fight for my family and very specifically i'm going to fight for my family i want you to raise your hand some of you this is a big deal because you're sitting next to the person that you've drifted from or maybe right now you're sitting next to the person that you're fighting for come on in faith just say god i i'm gonna fight for my family fighting for my kids fighting for my kids hearts fighting for my parents i'm fighting for my husband's heart i'm fighting for my wife's heart fighting for my family god fighting for my siblings and so right now god i rebuke the devil off of the family in jesus name i reboot the spirit of divorce coming against the family in jesus name the spirit of rebellion god we come against that in jesus name and what god has joined together [Music] let no man separate it let no woman separate it let no affair separate it let no judge separate it let no divorce paper separated let no lust separate it let no pride separate it what god has joined together we'll be one in jesus name god right now we claim our children's hearts in jesus name that our children belong to the lord we call them back in god we call our kids into the kingdom in jesus name and here's what we know it's not by might it's not by my strength that my family will be saved because the battle is the lord's and he will give the victory and he will give the victory and he will give the victory listen i pray this over you that the lord would bless you he would bless your families he would bless you he would keep you he would keep your children he would make his face to shine upon you and be gracious to you that he'd lift up his countenance on you and he would give you shalom [Music] a deep peace bathing peace and overwhelming peace to come upon you and that the lord's blessing would rest upon you and your families forevermore in jesus name in jesus name here's what we're gonna do okay is the band's gonna lead us in that song this is a number six song okay and i'm gonna i'm gonna this isn't for everybody but i feel like some of you need to make a statement there's a handful of individuals out here for your own reason their hands full of couples out here for your own reason some of you actually need to step out of your seat you come down here to the front because that's a this is a statement some of you need to make a statement there's a family we're gonna fight this would be this is between you and the lord junior you and your spouse whatever that is that while this song's being played allow this song to be sung over your family in jesus name let's worship together

Channel: VictoryATL

Views: 4,184

Rating: 4.869565 out of 5

Keywords: Victory Church, Johnson Bowie, Family-ish series, how to fight for family, what does the Bible say about families, how to keep a family together

Id: fIbBN4VWxX8

Length: 52min 31sec (3151 seconds)

Published: Sun Aug 29 2021