Explaining PDA, OCD, SPD, Anxiety & how to help your child with a dual diagnosis

hey guys welcome back to my channel [Music] so today i wanted to talk a little bit about a dual diagnosis every child is different but very rarely is a child just diagnosed with uh being on the autistic spectrum so some children are diagnosed with having ocd anxiety tourettes adhd and pda they're the sort of main ones that come with the autistic diagnosis now this might sound all very scary and it's a bit like what what are all these things and should i be worried and please do not panic all these different labels they're just words but i just wanted to talk a little bit about it and what it means so if you get a diagnosis and they say oh they also have ocd what it means and how you can perhaps help support your child [Music] so dylan is on the autistic spectrum he also has severe anxiety which came at about probably we started really noticing at about 10 11. anxiety is a big one this is really really hard and again it's about having everything from me for for dylan having everything mapped out taking deep breaths getting into the meditation anxiety is all in the head once it's in the head it then manifests itself in the body and i know when i get anxious and i'm an anxious person as well my shoulders go up i get that knot in my stomach things like breathing kind of lowering my shoulders down going for a walk going for a swim all help me but i'm an adult i know how to do that how do you help your child essential oils are really good and i rub dylan's feet for younger children putting on calming music you know kind of doing that to their hand getting them back into their body again [Music] ocd obsessive compulsive disorder now this is a word that's kind of like thrown around a little bit like i sometimes say oh i have ocd because i like a tiny house or i like my wardrobe to look a certain way but obsessive compulsive disorder is a condition that can be very debilitating to a lot of adults and it can literally take over people's lives now before you start panicking there are things that can be done like with autism the earlier you sort of recognize it the more you can do about it further on in the season we're going to speak to a friend of mine called dan who gives some great advice what he did with his son but basically it's to change up routines if you notice your child being obsessive about something you know it can be a routine it can be your toys it could be things being a certain way it could be doing things a certain way now how do you break that pattern so dylan would have to do things a certain way and he got into a habit of going three times and he did it twice he had to go back and do it again he had to do it in the same way every time that ocd is usually heightened in times of anxiety so anxiety and ocd tend to go together for dylan i would get his hand after one go and he wouldn't like it because he felt like he had to do it and then i would say to him now he's older say well look if you don't do it three times what do you think is going to happen and he would say something bad's going to happen and i would do it once and i'd say see nothing bad happened and after a few kind of meltdowns and uh crying episodes you kind of realize that actually nothing bad is gonna happen if i do that but you have to kind of break the cycle and this is what i do and i suggest for younger children instead of breaking up the cycle or you know if you leave the house at 8 30 every morning perhaps leave at 8 35 one morning because life isn't always going to go smoothly and life is always going to throw curve balls so the more you can break up routines the more your child's going to get used to and at first you're thinking why am i doing this i'm upsetting my child just let them do what they're happy with but that child is going to become a teenager that teenager is going to become an adult and if you have an adult with severe ocd they can control your life because they are so controlled in their own life and you don't want that so the earlier you can sort of break that routine the better you can ask your gp or your pediatrician about ocd and if you want to get your child diagnosis um go ahead and do that tourettes i think maybe you and i would know it as saying things uncontrollably but it's saying things uncontrollably and your body acting in a way that you can't control you usually get a diagnosis around 10 11 12 and it's sort of easier to diagnose at that age before that they can present itself in like a tick or a stim but when they become sort of teenagers it becomes more apparent that it's actually tourette's so i'm not an expert on tourette's as dylan doesn't have tourette's but i know it is a very it's a very common uh dual diagnosis with autism again don't worry there's nothing to be embarrassed about or ashamed about if you're if you're autistic and you are worried about tourettes please do talk to your doctor and they can lead you in the right way there's also some fantastic youtube videos dedicated to tourette's that you can look up as well i will link some below for you [Music] pda so this is something that i've had to learn about and a quick crash course in the past couple of uh months which is pathological demand avoidance and i think i spoke about it a little bit in my um in my video when we came back and basically it's any demands being put on them they avoid basically and you might say oh all kids do that it's quite severe in terms of you know in terms of you need to go to the toilet no i won't go to the toilet i didn't realize that dylan had pda i had to learn the hard way because i'd say to him do you need to eat your food and he'd say no and i'm like no you need to eat your food and he'd say no so the more i pushed the more he pushed back at me the more he got angry and the harder it was to get back from that if you think your child has pda the best way to get around that is literally just to rephrase things and to make it very child-led so you can say do you want to eat dinner tonight at six o'clock or 6 30 and even that small little change makes them feel they're more in control even though you're the one in the driving seat you're basically saying do you want to go left or right and you're giving them that choice by giving them that choice you're taking away the demand so they feel they're in control and they can go okay so for dylan i was like that's no problem so which time do you want to eat then 6 or 6 30. and even though it was half an hour different he felt in control he felt calmer and we we managed to go ahead that way again with the food i mean there's obviously certain things in life i am the parent i am the one who knows better quite frankly sometimes sometimes and i had to say to him no it's three meals a day and with that three meals a day you can have them whenever you want and at first he was like no i'm gonna have two meals a day and i was like nope three meals a day and end of conversation i just walked away and then i come back in again and i would literally just keep this up until his body got used to eating again as i mentioned before he had an eating disorder based on control um it wasn't anorexia nervosa he got looked into for that it was literally he felt out of control he felt anxious what could he control that was what went into his mouth and i couldn't do anything about it which was pretty heartbreaking as a mother but the way we got around that was to lower his anxiety around food to help him eat in his room away from other people so if your child is having difficulty eating have a look at the setting have a look at the lighting have a look who's there maybe they want to eat on their own whatever it is let them do it you'll slowly get them back but sometimes it feels like you're going five steps back to go two steps forward but you will get to your end goal so give yourself time give your child time and work on it together you know if your child is verbal ask them what would they prefer you know what do they want for dinner would they want this or this and it could be do you want mashed potatoes or roast potatoes at least you're giving them an option so hopefully that should help listen for my water school so it's muffy day here come sit down dinosaur and do you want to tell people what adhd is attention deficit hyperactivity disorder it will get really thinly and it's hard to concentrate and you can't sit down can you yes that's why in school i was almost standing up the whole time do you really set up in school all day i just do this on the table and i just can you tell everybody what you use in school to help you with your adhd like what helps you find bits of blue tap in their tables and then i play with them so he gets blue tack and he just plays with it and it stretches under the table which is a good one he likes doing that you you have a lot of friends who were autistic don't you yeah so luca because all he's ever known is having a brother on the spectrum luca feels very comfortable with other children who are on the spectrum and there's a few in your class how many in your class um so he has adhd and autism and he finds it hard to struggle so that's the most common dual diagnosis would be the adhd and autism together that's the most common one luca doesn't stim as such but he finds it very hard to sit still and also he's very sensory so sensory processing disorder is basically a way you can find lights too bright you can find sounds too bright clothing or you have an issue with clothing don't you he does not like certain clothing at all he finds fancy clothes uncomfortable by fancy clothes he means a school uniform he means jeans jeans are not fancy he just wants to work like tracksuits all the time but that again is sensory processing disorder and i know that if luca gets too hot or too cold he loses concentration it doesn't like food touching either but again i don't know is that because he's following his big brother or is that something you don't like what do you reckon do you think it's because you've always seen dylan do that no it's because i have seen dylan do it mm-hmm and sometimes if i see foods that don't look that nice i don't want to eat it yeah he has an adversion to a lot of foods is it going to be a video yeah okay do i get a microphone thingy when your child's diagnosed with autism you have all those younger things to contend with in terms of you know what's the life going to be like how is it going to be and i think the journey with autism is ever-changing like where we were when he was two is nowhere near where we are now but every stage has its challenges just like any child going through teenagehood it's difficult right you've got hormones and i'm trying to explain that to dylan at the moment a lot of people say to me at what level is dylan diagnosed i don't like answering that question because it changes it really does it's different here into the uk than it is in america so but he was diagnosed as quite severely autistic he might never talk um walk make friends and of course now he's done all of those things so if you're looking at the richter scale you might go well he's he can do this but he can't do this and then you look at you know toileting he couldn't really help himself on the toilet up until last year so again that would be classed as quite severe so it the whole range of spectrum goes like this um so i don't really like answering those questions of where he was because it changes all the time you're right cutie should we talk about you about how beautiful you are what does mommy do with you mommy always says i'm beautiful and she kisses me a load of time she i do we have special times together don't we i want tickles not right now please tickle me again he likes sensory touch as well so i hope that's not too much information for you please do not freak out i just wanted you guys to be aware that sometimes when you get your autism diagnosis you also get another diagnosis because it likes to come together with something else but it's all gonna be okay as always you have got this your child has got it and you know like i said the spectrum moves and some days you have bad days sometimes you've got good days isn't that right yeah and on the bad days we think what we're grateful for we give each other lots of hug and time and love and we just make sure that we look after each other and you guys look after yourselves and yeah if you guys have any questions or you want to comment below please do subscribe to us ring that bell subscribe and press that like button is it a like button now yes this is like man i'm so ancient i thought it was a bell the bell is notifications and then the notifications like every time you make a video and they're like playing a game or something or making a notification saying tara lenses made a new video okay so what do we want what do we want our subscribers to do you know what that is now and subscribing you know what that is and then like button it's just a like button is just they like the video oh a like i think this is like a light like a thing i like bob if anybody would like to leave a comment for luca please just put luca in the beginning and he'll read it sometimes i feel like i'm the only reason that everyone likes the channel guys i'm the actor everyone loves me wow uh you're humble too yes do you know what humble means no yeah all of you subscribers are the best you're the only reason why we keep doing this yes that's right we love you we love you and we'll see you very soon yes goodbye now goodbye now goodbye bye

Channel: Coming Home to Autism

Views: 14,732

Keywords: coming home to autism, tara leniston, autism, autistic son, family vlog, family, ASC, ASD, PDA, pathological demand avoidance, anxiety, child anxiety, autism diagnosis, early intervention, OCD, tourettes, SPD, sensory processing disorder, sensitive to lights, sensitive to sounds, dual diagnosis, autism and ADHD

Id: xIlWurKZn3U

Length: 14min 6sec (846 seconds)

Published: Sun Nov 21 2021