Dylan Farrow on Trusting Her Husband & How HBO Max's Docuseries Helped Her Family | FULL INTERVIEW

our first guest is the main subject in the harrowing documentary allen versus pharaoh in which she leaves no stone left unturned bearing it all about the abuse she says she endured as a child it is important to note that woody allen has never been criminally charged in connection with these allegations to say this story has a very complicated history is an understatement please take a look the new hbo docu-series allen versus pharaoh examines the abuse allegations involving fame director woody allen this series revolves around dylan farrow the adopted daughter of actress mia ferro and woody allen raised by someone considered to be a treasure of the cinema dylan's childhood was once seen as idyllic to the outside world but in 1992 when abuse allegations were raised that all changed ellen denies child abuse woody gave a press conference and our jaws dropped no matter what you think you know it's just the tip of the iceberg dividing her family hollywood and the public dylan's claims of abuse and the latest interviews bring us into her past trauma with the aid of her brother ronan and her mother's perspectives new footage and recordings are shared in this documentary seemingly supporting the claims made by the then seven-year-old dylan he made me feel so special that's where things get really really complicated because throughout all of those good times there was a lot more going on woody allen and his wife sunyi also an adopted daughter of mia have consistently denied these allegations stating that they are quote categorically false it's taken me a long time to sort of reconcile that you can love somebody and be afraid of them an adult now dylan remains adamant in her disclosures that she has repeatedly stated for the past 20 years she now uses her platform to try and teach other survivors to be brave and resilient themselves i'm very honored to welcome the very brave dylan farrow [Applause] i feel like you look so different in person do i oh my god i have all my makeup on like normally i'm like if you saw me crawl into work every morning i look like someone they wouldn't let in the building and not the same way there was very nice girl who came to the hotel and she did it ahead of time and it was really cute my daughter got to see all of her makeup stuff she was very enamored of that so you know our life is in chapters and i think we should hold this conversation especially in honor of you being an incredible novelist oh my gosh with your brand new book out called hush um i think i would love to conduct this conversation if i may in a writerly way to honor your beautiful career and because i do believe that life is a book with many chapters i want to say first out of the gate too that i uh i would like to explain myself because this is not about me but i wanted to sort of have this type of candor i worked with woody allen i did a film with him in 1996 called everyone says i love you and um there was no higher career calling card than to work with woody allen and then i had children and it changed me because i realized that i was one of the people who was basically gaslit into not looking at a narrative beyond what i was being told and i see what's happening in the industry now yeah and that is because of you making that brave choice so thank you for that thank you oh my goodness hearing what you just said like i mean i i'm trying not to cry right now um but like it it it just just so meaningful because it's easy for me to say like of course you shouldn't work with him you know he's a jerk he's a monster but i just find it incredibly brave and incredibly generous that that you would say to me that um that that my story and what what i what i went through was important enough to you to to reconsider that absolutely and how hard was it for you to engage in this documentary which i really want to make a caveat about that your family did not produce no no they came to us i think that's very important for people to understand your family did not produce this documentary we participated and apparently everyone was asked to participate yeah no they they they went to everyone um and and and that was important you know even just to me to know that like that there was a level of journalistic integrity at work here so did your family get together and say these people are different they're taking a tone they're using a diligence there there's a thoroughness here that feels safer in order to come out and make this brave decision um i was actually the one who initially told my mom and told ronan you know like hey you know i sat down with with these people and i really think that they are on the up and up so then when my mom agreed to be interviewed i was really really shocked and when ronan agreed i was even more shocked and then fletcher agreed and i was i mean i was picking my job off the floor and you know gradually more and more of my siblings signed on and a few of them didn't and i've spoken to them about that too and i i respect that decision as well um but i mean in terms of like a family meeting not really but um but there was there was communication and interestingly the the documentary has led to greater communication between us as a result i think which is interesting may i ask why you were surprised that they signed on i think mostly because we wouldn't talk about it to each other so talking about it publicly it was just it just seemed absolutely incomprehensible how did your mom feel watching the documentary i mean it was tough because i would have loved to have been able to watch the series with her um and at the time that just wasn't possible we were we were in separate quarantine pods unfortunately um so i really sort of heard everything from her after the fact you know it was just a very strange pathway that we navigated separately and together but i think it it definitely changed a lot about how we how me and my mom relate to each other and interact with each other and i think there's a very renewed level of just respect just woman to woman i mean sometimes when i think back uh on memories of my life there has like a gauze a patina a sort of surrealist reverie um i know mentally that time has gone by but i also can feel like i can be back there in a moment's notice like that um even if it does feel almost watching a home movie and then when you were watching the home movie of you what did you think and feel and remember it was a really bizarre psychological experience for me honestly because i had the video in my house um i gave it to my husband and i just said put it into sort of like the darkest corner that you can find just know where it is and that moment of just in case happened when i was talking to amy and she asked if she could see slash use the video in the series and my first reaction was like absolutely not like no i draw the line here this is too much it is too personal i don't want to see the video i don't want anybody else to see this video and amy i don't know how she talked me into it she managed to get the video taken i i had my husband bring it out of that dark corner of wherever he stashed it in the closet and we watched it on someone's computer and my husband had to leave the room he was like i can't this is like this is too much and i was just like completely numb i watched the entire thing as though i was watching someone else just a little girl who looked kind of like me who you know sounded kind of like me you know and i just completely disassociated from it and you know they went on their way i was like please just you know let me think over using this and a week went by almost like exactly and i was sitting in my house and i just suddenly burst into tears and it just it hit me everything from the tape just i mean it punched me right in the face and i was just sobbing uncontrollably for like a couple of days on and off about what i saw and just sort of trying to mentally reconcile the fact that that little girl on the tape was me and she was talking about something that happened to me and it was overwhelming it's very difficult sometimes to know that that part of me is such a dark painful place i mean because when i look at my life now i have a wonderful husband i have a wonderful daughter i have a wonderful life and i'm really excited about you know my career writing and you know taking my daughter to kindergarten next year and all the all the wonderful things that surround me and yet there is this impenetrable darkness deep deep inside that i mean i'm gonna be honest i just i still don't know what to do with wow i would love to talk about your husband how do you go from having the life that you had and and not being trepidatious but being emboldened i really liked him i was i was very smitten and i felt confident that i wasn't like asking for something ridiculous because i've you know seen guys and i've been like so what do you think of moving this into relationship territory and they just like book it and at the time of course i internalized that as like oh well this is because i'm messed up um and so you know how did you not do that with your husband that is a really good question i guess it was because i really liked him he did try to break up with me and a lot of that was because i had hang-ups about sex so i think it was when he tried to break up with me was when it sort of crystallized for me that this was something that i wanted um this was something that i wanted enough to address the things that he was talking about the issues which was sex which was from trauma which was from things that i did not like to think about so in a lot of ways it really i think it started me sort of on that path to looking inward and examining myself a little bit more critically so then did you overcome that hurdle i'm guessing it's an ongoing process i mean because in a lot of in a lot of ways i feel like sex hang-ups are something that grow with us and it's just sort of confronting the issues as they arise and not getting discouraged by them i guess i mean what is wrong with me has been like my mantra across my life and i'm trying to change it because it's an outlook thing it's an attitude thing and the fact that it's my knee-jerk reaction you know is because of trauma it's because i internalize things and i think that everything is my fault and i think that i'm a failure and i'm you know again like what the the person that i am when i'm tanked so today say that crops up it rears its ugly head how do you whack them all that today what would your inner dialogue be today to thwart that demon it's you know honestly i i want to know the answer to that question too because it is a work in progress and sometimes it does feel like i'm flinging pennies at a battleship and you know that there's nothing i mean like that i can say or do for myself to myself that will change anything because i'm stuck and yet you're out there being brave so what attempts did you make to reclaim your life you know like there are times when i'll be you know having a bad day and my daughter will come home from school and i'm just like okay no now i am in mom mode i am i am her mother now and this this can't interfere with that i can't let that interfere with with her um because i don't want her i don't want my problems to be her problems do you think that you're the most sane when it comes to being a parent i think being a parent has given me a clarity of being able to sort of step outside of all the craziness in my brain and examine myself as who do i want this person to be that my little girl is going to see looking up to for her entire life i i want her to think you know my mom was a fighter and i want her to think you know my mom never gave up and my mom didn't let crappy people bring her down she you know she stood up to people she stood up for the things that she believed in the things she was she thought was right um and i want to be that person too do you know that you take on a very different energy when you talk about being a parent i love being a parent i love being i love being evangeline's parent i you know she is just the light that she brings to my life is indescribable is it the best thing that's ever happened to your life yeah it really i mean i'm very lucky i have a lot of good things in my life and evangeline i feel has just elevated that how do you deal with any fears that crop up as a parent because i have mine from my own history or my own stories or things that are big triggers to me i mean i i think about that a lot because i do have things that trigger me in my daily life things that you know are probably just like completely stupid for other people that just send me completely down the spiral and i'm actually kind of proud of myself that i've gotten to the point where i can see a trigger or experience some sort of trigger i freeze and all that you know fun stuff happens the the emotions the the recall the sensations and i can process it and sometimes it means waiting through some of the negativity how do you tell people to handle their triggers if you see an image i mean i mean this happened to me like last week maybe the week before i was just you know scrolling through my uh news feed and an article pops up that you know who and his his wife went to a restaurant and i was just tailspin completely i was just like i can't handle this i don't want to see this like why are they going to restaurants anyway like i was really very heavily triggered and i was not okay and it took a couple days of me just sort of like trying to like massage myself back into a normal space can i ask do you you know if people looking in who maybe have not experienced anything like this is it the layers the repetition the many years you watch the documentary and it's it's it's really i mean the unfairness of it it's frustrating and then it makes me feel hopeless like like what was the point of it and then it's reminding myself of facts that i know things that i can tether to the documentary did accomplish something i mean i think rain reported that people were calling them at an increased rate of like about 20 during the documentary which means that survivors are out there connecting with my story and and healing from it it's bittersweet thinking you know like this story is something that connects a lot of survivors who are hurting and okay what more can we do for them like how how can we make this this world a space that women feel empowered or feel at least less terrified that is so well said thank you it really is what a perfect amazing answer to that question it's tough because like i wish that i could say like here is here is like you know a 10-step plan to you know completely feeling healed and fulfilled in your life if you follow these steps you know you're you're going to be just fine i wish i had that what works for me might not work for somebody else so i think the best the best advice that i offer is just be true to yourself and and and and and and the truth that you have lived as a last question uh you turned to fantasy writing i did um what do you get out of creating these fantasy worlds for yourself and what do you want other people to get from them i think in a lot of ways seeing that sort of veil of fantasy is a very appealing way for me to sort of process stories that are stories that i read how they relate to myself sort of um understanding them a little bit better maybe you know it's a metaphor or an allegory of like a dragon because like dragons are dragons are cool dragons are awesome and dragons are also really scary i was gonna say they really represent like the thing that you slay yes they are there to be overcome or they will eat you alive yes and it's a very it's the ultimate metaphor for struggle is a dragon in the metaphor of the book and the closing of that circle and that loop what is your next chapter well i'm actually really excited i i've entered the editing phase for the sequel to hush and i'm looking at starting a whole new writing project and you know diving into something completely different maybe and also just you know continuing my my little life in my little house with my little family unit and seeing seeing what else is on the horizon i feel like you know i feel like good things are on the way i think that is absolutely full of hope full of strength thank you so much um dylan farrow the four-part hbo documentary series allen versus pharaoh is available on hbo and hbo max and her book hush is also available and apparently might have a sequel which is very exciting thank you so much dylan for coming here this conversation everything i've been so looking forward to it oh seriously thank you thank you so much everybody thank you so much

Channel: The Drew Barrymore Show

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Keywords: drew barrymore, drew barrymore show, drew barrymore talk show, drew show, drew, interview, drew barrymore films, drew barrymore e.t., drew barrymore news, drew barrymore career, talk show, daytime show, dylan farrow, kathering schwarzenergger pratt, allen v farrow, hbo max, dylan farrow interview, drew barrymore dylan farrow, dylan farrow 2021, dylan farrow on drew, drew barrymore full episode

Id: x7bElVJBIyY

Length: 24min 30sec (1470 seconds)

Published: Mon May 17 2021

Reddit Comments

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[u/Algaealligator]

Thanks for posting! I’m looking forward to reading her book, now that I know it’s available

[u/Remindme2000]

As I am watching the HBO series I realized so many celebs ignored what he did. They continued to praise him publicly. It is disgusting. He abused his daughter...and MARRIED another that he helped raise. How can their be any denial? He married his daughter.... I watched Dylan speak. I saw her teeth chattering and her shakung as she spoke. That is a trauma response.

I do not care that Moses says it didn't happen. He was not given even fleeting attention from woody. He only wanted those girls and his biological child, sachel. The others moved on the outer circles of that family. He was given financial support, paid college etc by woody. Ronan has said Woody offered him the same IF he spoke put publicly against Dylan and Mia. I see a clear motive for his stance after years of saying he wanted nothing to do with Woody after he abused one sister and married the other.

Adults saw inappropriate things occur. There is no denying that.

It is disgusting how this has played out and how he is still heralded as a one of the best filmmakers of all time and the fact the custody trial made its own statements saying he was indeed inappropriate with Dylan and everyone has ignored that!!!

I do not understand how he walks free. And now there is a whole list of other celebs I no longer support because they support an pedophile.