Donor Dad | Father discovers he has 11 children he never knew about | Sunday Night

[Music] bays are incredible the very family-oriented they're selfless when people used to ask Ken Allen about his life his story was simple retired teacher amateur beekeeper and father of four or so he thought this 59 year old has recently found out his life isn't quite so simple he's also dead to 11 other kids that he never knew existed four of them have so far been discovered what word would you use to to sum it up 11 11 kidding me yeah I just kept on thinking that and then I thought how am I to tell soon how am I gonna tell the kids ken has been married to sue for 36 years ken was always um doing different things yeah he wasn't you normal he was he always seemed to be exciting to be around they have three children of their own and one adopted daughter to understand how four children turned into fifteen need to go back to the late 1970s when Ken was studying to be a midwife in Melbourne there's a photograph of you and yeah I think you wanted the only blokes in the picture be wrong yeah what why mate wife um look I just love seeing families and seeing them in a joyful environment and it's it's it's really great to be around as a midwife did you see parents who were straitly or couldn't have children absolutely it was a lot of fun and certainly a lot a lot of parents that were unable to have children and they had a real trial real anguish in 1982 Ken married sue a year later they had a daughter Leah and five years after that their first son Marcus so now you have leav Marcus mm-hmm at some point you decided to do something yes what's that I really recognize the need for sperm donors and came home too soon and said look we've got these beautiful kids you know and you know there's so many couples that over here my heart bleeds for so Ken I'll sue if he should become a donor so all of a sudden you know your husband will potentially be father to a number of other children yeah I at the time I didn't hesitate um yeah I yeah the I was working at the same hospital so I had a lot of interaction with these sorts of families as well so it's in learn no hesitation no hesitation at the time over two months ken made multiple visits to a clinic anonymous donations he hoped would bring new life to young couples trying to conceive so a couple who can't conceive who don't know your name they don't know your background but they just know certain things what what information was given to those parents yeah there's a two-page sheet which had my occupation my eye color hair color eye height there's not much information for a prospective parents to go on know it student two pages yes I hope I have it here yes two pages very very brief but the philosophy section mm-hmm caught my eye and there's a quote you wrote on there could you read that for me sure it says man cannot discover Asians unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore why'd you write that I knew that there was a possibility that my don't offspring may in future get ahold of this and I really wanted to encourage them to pursue their dreams and also to perhaps pursue me so in that brief two-page synopsis you'd brittle coded messages yes can never expected contact after all the laws in those days meant everything was anonymous donors would never know if any pregnancies eventuated and any children conceived would know who the donor was I would have liked have had some contact of some sort but at that point in time we were taught that it was and had to be anonymous donation so life went on Ken and Sue had a third child Jason and then adopted a daughter from Taiwan named Jaron he continued teaching becoming the principal of his local high school then in late 2014 on his lunch break came a bombshell phone call from the IVF clinic where he donated all those years earlier she said well you have and two of the girls said how does that make you feel I said well I'm not drinking then but probably do something right now your NGO lunch break father of four kids yes you can have lunch break father of 15 kids it's wrong in the space of a lunch break you gained 11 children absolutely it was a real shot system and she goes yes you know I'm sorry that you but you know would you mind me putting you in contact with this young man he's looking for you and this was the young lady who was searching for Ken 25 year old Chloe or worthy when I turned 18 I thought this is the time I can now you know look for this man who was given me the gift of life what why did you want to know why do you want to meet him I wanted to meet him to understand more about my identity um also my medical history was a really big thing unbeknown to Ken Chloe had spent 7 years searching trying to find her biological father strangers I love music I love odd I love dance I love life and learning new things and no teaching [Music] I guess I just thought I can't be this different where is this all come from and I thought this has to have come from somewhere all Chloe had ever known about Ken was the two-page profile he'd completed decades earlier I'd never had this information before and just knowing an eye color a hair color he's philosophy for life was incredible and what was that philosophy he's philosophy for life he noted that down as men can not discover new oceans unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore ken told me he wrote that as a code to his children okay to find him wow I didn't know that I wasn't aware of that that's lovely that was a secret message Wow to take the take the risk take the chance well I contend and Chloe took the chance you've been sharing videos on YouTube of a search backstory and shorter that I can do it is I am Darlie conceived which means that my parents needed a little bit of help Enoch creating me did you ever want to give up no never there was never a doubt in my mind I didn't care how hard it was or how many people told me no we will not help you find your donor or know your donor won't be found you're pretty determined I was very determined and that determination finally paid off I got a phone call from Melbourne IVF and she said once again are you sitting down and I thought I don't mind if it's a sibling or the donor either one would be great and she said I've had contact from your donor Ken and that was amazing how'd that make you feel that you've found you've got a daughter as she wants she wants to meet you hmm it was it was pretty awesome really I flew to Adelaide and that flight was so anxiety provoking I was just thinking the whole time I'm about to meet this man that I've dreamt about you know and he's at the airport and and I'm gonna say him and I'm gonna hug you in the first time I spotted him instantly and I said to my partner I said sit that's him I know that's him he turned and instantly our eyes made connection husband is good highways we both knew you know is that that was that was a person we were looking for I was just in disbelief that this man I could feel the warmth coming from him and the kindness in his eyes and that was half of me you know and he was right there was no so hard to describe it was just like and I have a whelming feeling of compassion of I just warmth really do you feel like a father it was very obvious that there was something more there yeah situations like this redefine the word family absolutely yeah put aside all the complexities to you in that moment yes who was she Ken Allen has just met Chloe the first of eleven children who were products of anonymous sperm donations he made in his 20 Chloe had been searching for Ken for years and that search is paid off in other unexpected ways while looking for a biological father Chloe found Robert whose parents had also used Ken as a donor this meant Robert was Chloe's half-brother I'd gone on this search looking for my biological father but I'd found so much more than that and at that point I thought this this isn't you know even the beginning I want to find all my siblings as well we met on the Geelong foreshore she was a lot shorter than I imagined but she was very friendly very friendly really nice girl I saw a lot of similarities between us did he look like your brother hi yeah we shared the same pale skin but he has beautiful blue eyes which I I missed out on is so very jealous of that Roberts parents are Dean and Margaret gomathy all they ever wanted was a family I remember the day that I went to my mum and dad's house and was crying and said you know it's not actually it's not just me who's not ovulating but it's also Dean you know we're both infertile and my dad who was from another generation said now love you're gonna have a baby you know you gotta have a baby even if it's using another man's sperm so that's just what's gonna happen so Dean and Margaret went to a fertility clinic and chose Ken's profile from the anonymous database I'm not in any way you know jealous of Ken or anything it's just a fact of life it's just the way we had to have children it was just different to others the ivf worked and Margaret gave birth to Robert it was just magical we were just tears mmm it was just really nice from that moment yet no doubt he was yours definitely it never felt anything other than that either never Dean always felt like he was both it ours yeah there was never a consideration that he was anything other than that Robert is now 27 like Chloe all he knew about his donor dad came from that two-page summary you write something which I presume at the time in a lot to him which is were quite she said man cannot discover new oceans unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore and for a long time that was all that was all I had in relation to the donor and and it stuck with me a lot so I got that hug I that's how you done to my to my body um after a lot of thought soon it was Robert stone to meet Kim then shake or hug very much physically I could see the the similarities between us immediately I was a little bit shell-shocked just for a moment just to to know this is this is my biological father this is a big moment for me in my life it was incredible and he was just just gave me a big hug and yeah didn't did like a guy for about a minute but it was it was it was excellent I feel good it felt great it was a really good experience ken was keen to discover the rest of his 11 newly discovered children and then in March last year that process became a whole lot easier Victoria introduced a new law a world-first which meant that donors could now be contacted by their biological children but controversially it also meant that children could be contacted even if they have no idea that were conceived with the use of a donor it was a letter pretty much started it it was it was the whole thing that I wasn't my father's daughter well biologically not not his for all her life Melissa Miller's dad Wayne was the center of her world three years ago he died of a heart attack eleven months later she received news that her dad wasn't her biological father instead it was a stranger named Ken Ellen and that stranger wanted to contact her at that point I just just cried I didn't know how to feel who I was just like numb inside so your whole life you grow up and you were never told you were dundar conceived you never never at all not once the thing though back him in my mind was that am i disrespecting my dad that was one big thing like because my dad didn't want me to know I just feel horrible that he's not here and I can't talk to him because he was I could be part of my wife would you prefer to if you if you haven't been told probably yeah pretty much despite this Mel agreed to meet Ken you could have said that I could have said no but I think just the curiosity of myself and wanting to know you know who this man was you know who that who was man that helped my dad have me the first moment you you had Ken yes the man who is your biological father yep how did you feel um not that actually like I think all my nerves went then like thinking yeah finding that you can I go home though but this man no he's he's blood he's my biological father but he's not my dad no one can replace my dad in Victoria the work of finding and contacting donor children rests with this government agency while three of Ken's kids have met him a fourth 25 year-old Nathan cough has just learned he's another of Ken's offspring you are the newest member of a very unique family yes I am how's it feel it's quite something I didn't expect I think you know six months ago oh my god Chloe has now met Nathan and they're making up for lost time Nathan knew from a young age he was done' conceived but he's yet to meet Ken what if the other guys told you about about Ken that he's the nicest bloke ever I've considered herself pretty lucky in that aspect I really came to meet him Ken and his family are also very musical [Music] something Nathan's new half-sister Chloe has inherited [Music] [Applause] and just like Chloe and Kenan Nathan shares the musical gene yeah yeah well I think in a bad that was kind of the craziest thing no I went straight the moment you know you'll never believe what my newfound sister does she sings the band also the grampians national park western Victoria Chloe Olli is driving her half brother Nathan cough to meet his biological father for the first time it will be a gathering of a new very unconventional family you know shake his head you can imagine it I think I'm gonna I think my huggy people prefer the sounds of things along I'm a hugger like those before him Nathan gets the for welcome treatment [Music] [Music] [Applause] [Music] not one after Robert arrives [Applause] it'll also be a special moment for Rob's Paris Dean and Margaret you said you've wanted all these years to thank the man who helped you what what do you say to Hank first I think I'll get my hug yeah thank you thanks for being the person you are without you we wouldn't have robbed fun it smells tannin those initial fears now replaced by laughter [Music] ken and his four new children spent hours catching up on last year's yeah [Laughter] and they get together for this very musical family wouldn't be complete without a single this family is quickly filing out they have more and more in common we all love the great outdoors and and we love hiking so we're gonna do a bit of walking and and just being in their company when for so long I didn't have that is so special to me out there somewhere are more members of this drawing family you have seven more sons out there yes in the late 20s means and they could be watching this yes what would you say to them um I suppose some yeah I'd really love to me with them I don't want to you know feel and so the thing force but I'd really love to make some form of contact so they know who I am and you know I also would like to let them know about my health as well and where that since look I I the last four years I've been diagnosed with that symptoms of Parkinson's there are a number of other medical issues that have a strong hereditary basis and and they're starting to show up in in some of our children now so you know for them to be in their twenties and thirties um they they need to be aware of those medical issues so they can actually take good care of themselves and seek the appropriate treatment but for now Ken's focus is on what's going well and that more than ever is spending time with his new modern family I mean to you guys now who who are the people around you know who are you guys - it's bigger than this isn't it I mean yes there are seven more effort that's right that's right there's seven there that we'd love to be in contact with the future and for sure yeah so how big can this canister group get Wow knowing that I had all these family out there like it's good to know you know have these people like it's overwhelming as Kim says it's just a big thing we don't recruit bugs look a bit more excited on the count of three one two three [Music] you

Channel: Sunday Night

Views: 574,124

Rating: 4.8929858 out of 5

Keywords: Sunday Night, 7 Network, News, Channel 7, Australia, Australian News, Current Affairs, world news, headlines, story, stories, Melissa Doyle, Steve Pennells, family, extended family, father, dad, donor, donor-conceived, Ken Allen, Chloe Allworthy, sperm donation, pregnancy, sperm donor, donor sperm, conception, donor offspring, Parkinson's, how it feels to be donor conceived, anonymous donor, sperm donor kids, sperm donor baby, health, donor conception, genetics

Id: EElCj8NjGxo

Length: 24min 10sec (1450 seconds)

Published: Sun Sep 02 2018