Do I Know The Magnitude of My Sin? | Fr. Michael Payyaplilly VC

the lord be with you and with your spirits a reading from the holy gospel according to matthew glory to you lord peter went up to jesus and said lord how must how often must i forgive my brother if he wrongs me as often as seven times jesus answered not seven i tell you but seventy seven times and so the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who decided to settle his accounts with his servants when the reckoning began they brought him a man who owed 000 talents but he had no means of paying so his master gave orders that he should be sold together with his wife and children and all his possessions to meet the debt at this the servant threw himself down at his master's feet give me time he said and i will pay the whole sum and the servant's master felt so sorry for him that he let him go and cancel the debt now as this servant went out he happened to meet a fellow servant who owed him 100 dinari and he seized him by the throat and began to throttle him pay what you owe me he said his fellow servant fell at his feet and implored him saying give me time and i will pay you but the other would not agree on the contrary he had him thrown into prison till he should pay the debt his fellow servants were deeply distressed when they saw what had happened and they went to their master and reported the whole affair to him then the master sent for him you wicked servant he said i cancelled all that debt of yours when you appealed to me were you not bound then to have pity on your fellow servant just as i had pity on you and in his anger the master handed him over to the torturers till he should pay all his debt and that is how my heavenly father will deal with you unless you each forgive your brother from your heart the gospel of the lord today's gospel passage is the parable of the unforgiving servant we just had uh around three or four weeks ago a full retreat on forgiveness and once you have a full retreat on forgiveness then you kind of get exhausted with what you have had to say but it's a beautiful parable that jesus brings out when jesus says about the parable of the unforgiving servant what's interesting here is the fluctuations that you can see in the attitude of of the master the king who who's decided to to take the accounts of the slave and settle the accounts with the slave and the word word tells us in matthew 18 verse 24 when the when he began the reckoning one who owed him 10 000 talents was brought to him so there's a couple of things that we we just need to we need to kind of have as a background to understand this one is what it means to owe a talent and what a talent is a talent according to those times one talent was 15 years of wage if you worked for 15 years you would get one talent and so he owes the king ten thousand talent now later we would read about the dinari one dinari this is hundred dinari that was owed by one slave to the other one dinari is one day's wage so just keep these two in mind one is one talent is 15 years of wage and he owes him he owes the king 10 000 talents one dinari is one day's wage and that slave owes the other slave a hundred dinari now let's go back into into how the king reacts to this when he comes to know that a slave owes him ten thousand talents he brought him to him as he could not pay the debt now look at the extreme the king ordered him to be sold together with his wife and children and all his possessions and make the payment that seems a bit bit too extreme now mind you jesus is telling a parable so this is not a true life incident that's happening but jesus is telling a parable but when jesus is telling a parable you can kind of read the mind of jesus when he's telling the story for the storyteller in every sentence and in every word is intending something when he's when he's bringing out the story or narrating the story so here jesus says the the king in order to get back those talents he says let him be sold together with his wife and children and all possessions because according to old testament law all this belong to the king now and so let the payment be made that way it seems kind of cruel to do something like that and that seems the extreme and why is jesus taking that extreme because we're going to see the other extreme now the slave fell on his knees and said have patience with me and i will pay it back that actually is a lie one talent is 15 years of wage 10 000 talents this man's not going to be alive forget about patience and that's where you start seeing jesus actually us using a lot of extremes over here jesus just doesn't say you know 100 talents it could be 100 denarii and 100 talents no jesus has gone to ten thousand talents an impossibility jesus is speaking about the king who wants to see sell everything wife possession everything and seem to be very mean or cruel so there's an extreme there that jesus is taking when he's narrating this parable and he says be patient with me i will pay back everything he can't pay it back now out of pity that's verse 27 out of pity for him the lord said that the slave should be released and forgiven the debt now that's the other extreme one extreme was this man seemed to be so cruel but why is jesus taking the extreme in order to reveal the other extreme to show the give the the big difference between the two when he forgives everything and says i don't need time i don't need the money i don't need the talents you're free to go and that's like a bonanza you you just don't don't expect something out of the blue something like this comes and he's walking out of there scot-free totally free without without having to pay any of the debt and then he comes across his fellow slave who owes him a hundred dinari 100 days wage he gets hold of him throttles his throat and tells him you paid back and he says i promise you give me some time the very same words give me some time and i'll pay it back and he's not able to he's not able to have that patience he puts him in prison and when the king comes to know he's wild now why is it why is it that the slave couldn't forgive his fellow slave when is it a struggle to forgive now this whole parable is about forgiveness it's it's it's a parable that's brought out when peter comes and speaks to jesus it's it's coming after a series of words that jesus speaks about forgiveness and about love and then peter says lord how many times should i forgive seven times and jesus says seventy seventy times seven or seventy seven times any one of the two according to the translations but what is surprising over here is he's not able to forgive why why is he not able to forgive who finds it difficult to forgive only a person who doesn't understand how much they have been forgiven are people who struggle to forgive someone else only people who haven't understood the intensity of their own sin and how much god has forgiven them are those who are not able to forgive other people their sins and that is why it's important to understand do we understand the intensity of our own sin do i understand the intensity of the sin that i have committed against the lord and have i understood the depth of his forgiveness for those sins that i've committed against him very often the forgiveness we give to someone else is is very integrally connected to our own sins and the forgiveness to our sins that we have received from god when i don't understand the intensity of my sin i don't understand how wrong my actions have been i will always struggle to forgive my brother my sister the wrong that they have done to me that's because i haven't understood what i have done to the lord you know it amazes me sometimes and i'm no one to judge when and someone comes into the confessional but at times what surprises me is there there are times when people come for maybe their yearly confession once a year they are making the confession and and there have been times when people have said i i don't have much to say i haven't committed many sins and it always surprises me that after one year we don't we we don't realize that we have actually committed sins we don't realize the intensity of that sin we were conducting the retreat in sydney when i was the director in the retreat center there and during the retreat we have an examination of conscience on the second day of the retreat before the confessions and it's this long list it's just to help people go through the examination of conscience and um we were going through this long list of sins and the different aspects of sins the person came to me after the retreat and told me father when i initially was going for confession i i started writing down what my sins were because that's what you asked us to do and and the person said i barely had two things to write it's been a year since i've made my confession but i just two things to write and i thought that there's not much that i have to say and the person said after listening to the examination of conscience and as you went through the different sins suddenly i had five pages to fill up i didn't know that i was committing sins i didn't know that i'm how much i'm hurting the lord very often that's the problem with today's society that's the problem with us as christians today we don't understand the intensity of our own sins we don't understand the impact it is making on god and when i don't understand that impact i don't understand how much i'm forgiven i don't understand the depth of that forgiveness i remember the other day i was i think it's been it's been a few months now but i had a dream at uh at night obviously at night and um it was only a dream it wasn't a vision mind you you can interpret it as a vision but it was only a dream but i was uh i was when i was sleeping i can i can see the crucifixion of jesus now mind you there's not a vision this is just a dream i can see the crucifixion of jesus happening and and they're putting the nails into his hands now they put the nails into into one hand and i can see the names of people you know this is your sin and that's the first first hammer blow that's coming in this is your sid and each person's name is coming i have no clue whose names these are but i i remember i don't know if i was listening to that that him as well how deep the father's love for us and in one of those uh in one of those stanzas the the the verse reads as um my sins have nailed him there i don't know if that day i was listening to that that him and that's why i had the dream i don't know but each time the hammer is coming down and the nail is piercing i can see these names called out you know in your name this one's in your name the second one this one's in your name in those of you who have ever watched a bollywood movie um a hindi movie and at one point there would be there would be times at the end of the movie in the long lengthy movies and we go on for two hours and more and at the end of the movie you'd have the the hero of the movie taking his revenge with a villain and and he's he's punching him and if it's you know um if it's anger because of what he's done to his family the first punch would be this is for my father who you hurt this is for my mother who you did wrong to and the third punch this is for my sister who you abused or whatever it was in and there'd be each punch would be for each each member of the family well if it's uh if it's going to be a a very big large family if victor is going to be punching me i'd have a lot of punches that i'd receive as well so it just depends according to hindi movies that's how it is each time in that dream when that hammer was coming down there were names that were coming and then it came to the next hand and the nail was put and then i can see the name michael it's actually my first name vijay that was there and that's the first and again i hit and again i hit and all that is my name and i woke up from that dream crying perspiring and crying and suddenly just that intensity when when everyone else's name came onto that it i don't think it disturbed me as much but when my name came up and that intensity with which the the hammer was coming down suddenly it was like making myself aware of how my sins have pinned him there sometimes this is this is our problem we don't understand the intensity of our sin and the depth of his forgiveness towards our sin now as long as i don't understand that when it comes to me forgiving my brother my sister i will also hold back because i haven't understood the intensity with which i have been forgiven the slave when he was forgiven the ten thousand talents it doesn't seem to have got into him the intensity of of this of what he owed to the king and the depth of the forgiveness that he has received from the king that is why when it came to his brother he couldn't forgive him because he hasn't understood the intensity of what he owed the king and the depth of the forgiveness he has just received anyone who understands the intensity each sin of ours against the lord is is in comparison to those 10 000 talents and this is why jesus has taken the extreme of ten thousand talents will you and i ever be able to repay the lord for what we have done to him take each of our sins and when we come into the reality of that sin i was speaking the other day to to one of our parishioners and um a close friend and and we were speaking about this uh um this prophecy of an illumination of sins that will take place now i've just started reading the book so i'm not an expert at it and nor am i propagating it um but it's been accepted by by bishops as well and this message it's about the illumination a time will come when there will be an illumination of our conscience where we will get to see all our sins as it happened from the time we were small all our sins in its reality and those who have gone through this are in shock of what has happened of the intensity of what their sin meant and what it meant to god and how it hurt god now mind you i'm not propagating any of that i'm not i'm not speaking about it because i'm just i've just started the book but it's it's just to bring ourselves into an awareness if i come to know what my sins have done to god in its reality what my sins have come to god not watered down in reality what my sins have done to god how much it has hurt the lord how much that hammer has banged down that nail into his hands if i understand that intensity and then i understand the depth of his forgiveness like the slave should have understood it with the king when i come across my brother my sister who has done me wrong it will pale in comparison the letter to the colossians chapter 3 verse 13 colossians 3 13 bear with one another and if anyone has a complaint against another forgive each other just as the lord has forgiven you so you must also forgive just as the lord has forgiven you the great intensity with which god has forgiven you you must also forgive that is the call that jesus is giving us let us ask the holy spirit one to enlighten us about our own sins and the pain it has caused god as as john the letter of john sorry the gospel of john chapter 16 verse 8 would say when he comes speaking about the holy spirit when he comes he will prove the world wrong about sin and righteousness and judgment he will make it plain and clear every day we should pray o holy spirit reveal to me the intensity of the sin that i have committed against my god don't brush it under the carpet don't water it down and say it doesn't mean much the holy spirit revealed to me the intensity of the sin that i've committed against the lord and revealed to me the depth of the forgiveness that he has given me and then we will be able to look at our brother our sister the sins that they have done against us and compare the 200 dinari to the 10 000 talents and be able to look at them and say i forgive you far i forgive you for what my lord has forgiven far more towards me a part of that forgiveness i offer to you the lord is calling us towards this forgiveness and this love let's ask the lord to give us this grace to understand the intensity of our sin the depth of his forgiveness for us and the call to forgive our brother our sister in return let's close eyes for a moment as we bring ourselves into the presence of the lord lord we pray our sins have pinned you to the cross every scourge that you went through every thorn that pierced your head the nail that pierced your hands and feet ultimately that lands that pierced your heart it was our sins to all of it you said i forgive you give me the grace of jesus to understand the intensity of what i've done [Music] the great depth of forgiveness that you have given now i'm faced with a 200 dinari that my brother my sister owes me for what they've done to me the pain they've caused me and i compare it to the 10 000 talents of intensity of my sin and the depth of my forgiveness and on bended knees o lord in all humility i forgive my brother my sister for the 200 dinari is nothing in comparison to the 10 000 talents i owe you the name of the father and of the son and of the holy spirit amen

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Length: 23min 28sec (1408 seconds)

Published: Thu Mar 03 2022