Dan Bilzerian is the King of Simps (I Was Right)

every time i get that fresh express you know shit's about to go down i was right about dan bilzerian about a year ago i made a video lampooning him for representing everything wrong with social media dan has been the talk of the town recently everyone's making videos exposing dan bilzerian it's already been done people he's already been exposed who would have thought guys i certainly didn't see it coming that the trust fund ponzi scheme inheriting pseudo commando wannabe kirkland brand hugh hefner was a fraud remember this clip oh give me your gun i'll save the day last time we checked in on dan balzerian he got kicked out of the navy seals program like nine times threw a porn star off a roof and broke her foot and photoshopped celebrity pictures to make himself look cooler look it's never good to root for someone's downfall but i'm not a fan of liars so let's throw a goddamn party shall we according to forbes dan bilzerian is a renter and someone else pays his credit card bills lawsuit let's read this article together shall we the mansions the yachts the parties the models how does dan bilzerian the globetrotting cash-stacking gun totem instagram boasting partying playboy do it or more to the point how does he pay for it all according to a lawsuit filed this week he doesn't dan bilzerian rents his house and charges the rest of his six-figure lifestyle to a credit card that someone else pays off the lease on his home is 200 grand a month bro forbes reported on tuesday that ignite lost 50 million dollars last year and is likely to fail a recreational cannabis company turned into a cbd facade headed by this holier-than-thou i'm better than you sketchball is coming crashing down good dan bilzerian is such a cool guy he must get laid all the time these girls are on payroll wake up buddy nobody [ __ ] flies on a jet and goes to hang out with this dude no it's not how it works there's money involved he's not that cool have you seen him interact with people yeah it's all about the life set up i kind of like figured out that life is more about setup you know i wanted i wanted to like set it up so that i could get laid without like having a bunch of conversations and dates and whatnot so i swear man everyone who is friends with dan bilzerian just strokes off his ego because he has the appearance of money meanwhile his tall tales are complete [ __ ] i could make up a dan bilzerian story right now this one time i did a triple gainer off a bridge shotgun to beer blasted an rpg into a narwhals [ __ ] and then got brain from nine models on instagram what did you do today it's all about your life setup you know what pisses me off the most dan bilzerian's company ignite received 1.2 million dollars in federal aid for the coronavirus pandemic what does dan bilzerian need 1.2 million dollars for that he's asking for forgiveness on his loan he's blowing all of his money on fancy photo shoots that he can't pay for with investors money yachts and [ __ ] that's great he's a true american this cnbc video aged like milk it was posted about three weeks ago toured dan valzerian's 65 million dollar mansion with kevin o'leary you know the guy from shark tank secret lives of the super rich i've been inside some of the most incredible mansions in la this is the home of the infamous instagrammer dan bilzerian to his 27 million followers he's known as the king of instagram he's not the king of instagram he's literally a man child he's a puss boy he reportedly paid a mind-boggling 65 million dollars for this mega mansion number one the house was never bought it was rented number two dan doesn't pay for the house ignite does number three the funds for ignite come from investors not dan number four all the investors are pissed off because ignite is down 50 million dollars dan how are you good how you doing look at this clown vaping kevin o'leary from shark take enters your house yeah let me just get a fat rip real quick this house is a joke man it's too big it's ridiculous that's what we're shooting for it actually is a joke because it's not his house this is a bowling alley here you never know what you're gonna get today it's bowling and heels oh look at that there it is this is where the djs their performers set up what's the biggest performer we've ever had in here cardi b tiger marshmallow it was a lot yo remember when you photoshopped her pictures that was funny dude can you write any of this off because it's really promoting your brand and your lifestyle i mean i talked to my accountant about all of it i don't know this right here is gold hey dan can you expense any of this yeah he actually expenses all of it and that's the problem this guy heffernan blew the whistle on bilzerian according to the suit the accountants flagged 843 thousand dollars in company expenses that appear to be personal in nature these included payments for charges racked up on one of daniel bilzerian's credit cards a half million dollar yacht rental a six figure two night trip to london a 65 grand four elements guns and star wars set a fifty thousand bed frame and a seventy five thousand dollar paintball field and eighty eight thousand dollar vault to name a few the company also paid twenty six thousand dollars to boost bilzerian's instagram followers and paid for the travel expenses of the rotating cast of models that permanently accompanied bolsarian wherever he goes the suit claims dan says he made 50 million bucks playing high stakes poker so when i spot his card table that seems like a perfect place to ask dan how he can afford this lifestyle most people only dream of this is the dumbest thing ever and i think dan thinks it's like a galaxy brain move to say that he won all his money from poker there is not a snowball's chance in hell that dan balzerian won 50 million dollars in poker he's not good at poker second of all it's not on record how convenient it is yeah i won 50 million our main focus right now is on the cbd pens and we're doing um thc in the states that are legal for those pens hey guys spoiler alert cbd does nothing where do you want to be in 20 years the goal is to make a couple billion dollars in cannabis give a bunch of the way decent charity spend more time surfing in hawaii and then i want to be president you want to be president united states yeah i think i can do it not at this rate buddy not at this rate this man's igniting 50 million dollars kevin my guy kevin shark tank i got a question for you now that you know that dan balzerian's a fraud what do you think of him you know what's really ironic dan bilzerian prides himself on being a ladies man he says that because of his life set up he doesn't have to try anymore the women just flock to him he has so much sex it's boring to him now but guess what he pays for women to be around him therefore he's not the king of instagram he's the king of [ __ ] sisters philly i'm pulled up [ __ ] your [ __ ] anybody wanna run up put em all up in the ditch puss boys no gold better back up quick you punk don't flop [ __ ] you ain't [ __ ] you

Channel: Philion

Views: 1,273,201

Keywords: philionfit, phil rusnack, philion, dan bilzerian, bilzerian, blitz, ignite, dan bilzerian ignite, ignite fail, 50 million, ignite 50 million, king of simps, simp, simps, dan bilzerian manchild

Id: UO8XJI8VaGg

Length: 7min 51sec (471 seconds)

Published: Fri Aug 07 2020

Reddit Comments

[u/kivasquirrel]

Love his accent.