- <i> Tonight on Supernanny.</i> -<i> We have four
beautiful children.</i> -<i> But our schedules
are different,</i> which causes a conflict
in our marriage. <i> I work an overnight shift,</i> <i> so I try spending
some quality time with them.</i> - Emotionally,
how have you been feeling? - Oh, I'm drowning.
- We're just stuck in this rut of what we call everyday life. You can't deny
that you have said things to me that are way out of line.
- I don't deny it. - You want everything
at no cost. Nina, that ain't gonna happen. <i> Listen to me seriously,</i> how are you gonna change
anything? <i> I'm in the Windy City
of Chicago</i> <i> ready to help the Bean family.</i> <i> They are struggling
with four children</i> <i> under the age of 6.</i> - [crying]
- Please get up. - Don't cry.
You don't have to cry. You don't have to. -<i> Dad works
the graveyard shift.</i> <i> They really don't get to see
much of each other,</i> <i> so I'm hoping to help them</i> <i> find the balance
between work and home life.</i> - Excuse me,
we don't kick the book. I'm Nina.
- I'm David. - We live in Elmwood Park.
- Chicago, Illinois. - No. [laughing]
- Well, you--well, you told me to say Chicago,
is what you told me. - We're gonna be here
until midnight. <i> We've been together
for 15 years.</i> -<i> I couldn't imagine my life
with anybody else.</i> - Aww.
- [laughs] - Hello. -<i> We have four
beautiful children.</i> <i> Emily is sweet.
- She's more worried about</i> <i> other people than herself.</i> - Lucy was a difficult baby from day one. - Do not do that, remember? -<i> She just doesn't listen.</i> <i> Nora will be in a bad mood</i> <i> if she didn't get her way.</i> - She wanted a braid done
to her hair, <i> so she decided to throw
a temper tantrum about it.</i> -<i> Dylan was our surprise boy.</i> Yay.<i>
There's not a day that goes y</i> - <i> that kid doesn't have
a smile on his face.</i> - In the morning,
I want your beds made. - No. -<i> I'm a bus mechanic.</i> I leave for work
at 10:30 at night and I don't get home
until by 8:00 in the morning. <i> So, it's hard for me
to discipline the children</i> <i> because I'm trying</i> <i> to spend some quality time
with them</i> <i> so I'd just rather
just give them what they want.</i> -<i> I am a stay-at-home mom</i> and I also work
at a restaurant part-time. -<i> Our schedules are different.</i> She's dealing with them
most of the hard part of the day <i> where they're up
full of energy,</i> whereas versus me
as I'm getting them out, <i> they're trying to wind down</i> <i> before they got to go to bed.</i> - It's exhausting. What's wrong, Nora? <i> Nora and Lucy
have been difficult.</i> No matter what type
of punishment we do, <i> they just don't listen.</i> <i> When it comes to discipline,</i> <i> we are not on the same page.</i> - It causes conflict
in our marriage <i> because we're so focused
on them.</i> <i> We need time to focus
on each other.</i> - It's 7:30.
I'm done. No more mommy. <i> We just kind of live life
together for the kids.</i> - I don't wanna
use the word desperate, but I think
that we're out of options. - <i> Today, I'm observing,
asking questions,</i> <i> so I've asked dad
if he could take some time</i> <i> off of work so that
he'll be awake this morning</i> <i> so that I can assess
the whole family.</i> - Why were you so cranky? Jo is about to come
and I am feeling anxious. <i> And I'm wondering
if anyone has ever backed out</i> <i> because they're so nervous.</i> - [doorbell dings]<i>
Someone's at the door.</i> - Come on in.
- Hi. - Hello.
- Hi, how are you? - How are you?
- Good. How are you? - Good.
- Pleased to meet you. - Hi, I'm Nina.
- Hi. - Pleasure.
- I'm David. Nice to meet you.
- Pleasure. Nice to meet you. - Yes, yes.
- Hello, darling. - This is Nora. - How are you, Nora? Oh, quiet. - All right.
Who we got over here? Emily, how are you doing? Nice to meet you. Lucy, nice to meet you. Hi, Dylan.
Got a sleepyhead on. So today is just to watch you
with the children so that we can get
to the nitty-gritty of really where the challenges
truly lie. Sound good?
- Sounds good. - Yes.
- All right. - Emily, we need lunch, okay? - No cookies until after
you eat your food. - So milk times,
is this--no more? - Mm-hmm.
- Behavior-wise, I mean, they're all behaving well.
- Oh, no. - Sitting down, eating.
- No, no. - No. This one
is normally getting up the chair numerous times
walking around the house and... - You work during the weekdays? - My set schedule
is Wednesday during the day and then Friday night and then Sunday night.
- It's difficult. She leaves
and then I have to transition. I have to take over.
- Yeah. - And the communication
between her and I isn't there because, like, we're really,
like, breezing the wind. - Yeah.
- So, she's leaving and I'm-- and I'm taking over.
- Yeah. - David and Nina's schedule
is really tough because when one
is coming back from work, the other one's leaving. <i> They barely overlap.</i> <i> I mean,
this can't be easy for them</i> <i> or their kids.
-</i> Let's take a nap. Come on.
- Mommy. - I'm just taking
your bobby pins off. - Mommy. Mommy. - Goodnight, Nora. This is Nora's room.
- Yup. - And then here's
the girls' room. Lucy's on this side
and Emily's on this side. - Sweet. So in general,
how's the bedtime routine? - It's a struggle
because I feel that Dave has created
a monster for bedtime. So at 7:30, when he--
right after I say my goodnights, I'm done.
Don't come knocking. You should be sleeping.
- Right. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, yeah.
- And that's the way I feel. Like Dave will lollygag
upstairs and... - Lollygag? Do you lollygag, David?
- I do. I play with them.
- He stimulates them before they go to bed.
I call him the push-over because he--
- Look at his face, though. He feels like really bad
for you saying that. - That's the truth though. - And then the place--
- Because I--just I feel like they're gonna grow up so fast
and I'm gonna-- I'm gonna miss that
and I don't want to. I feel like
this is really the time that we really get to be father and daughters,
do you know what I mean? Like this is our
one-on-one time, you know what I mean? - Well, okay.
All right. I heard you. We'll work with that. It's really great
that David's involved with the bedtime routine, <i> but the kids need to sleep,</i> <i>and David keeps messing around.</i> - I guess I'm just fearful
in a way when they get older, like, I don' want them saying,
well, daddy didn't spend enough time with me
or I missed this with daddy and stuff like that. Like-- - You spend time
with your parents? - My mother and father divorced
when I was-- when I was younger,
so my father, like, kind of wasn't
that father figure to me. - Did you have any
intimate relationship with him? - No.
- All right. - Nope.
-<i> He's not having</i> the opportunity
to connect with his dad on a level
that he would really like to. - Come here. It's okay. - I do think
it has had an impact <i> on how he thinks</i> <i> about himself as a father</i> and the relationship
with his own children. <i> Covering the kids
and giving no discipline</i> <i> ultimately is gonna do them
more harm than good</i> <i> because they're not gonna
learn healthy boundaries.</i> - How do you wanna do it?
How do you wanna decorate it? - I wanna draw
like the hat black first. - Okay. - David, mom would normally
be at work by now, wouldn't she? - Yeah.
Nina will get home like around 10:00 at night
before I have to leave. - But in the morning,
what would you do? The--this--today, Wednesday. - Oh, right now,
I would be up. I wouldn't be--I wouldn't be
sleeping right now. Wednesday-- - All right.
So you do night shift on a Tuesday.
- Yes. And I'm up since-- - Since the night before?
- Yeah. - So you're up for a whole day 24 hours? - It's just--
it's just how it is. - How does that work
for the pair of you? How does that--how does that
have to make any sense? - It's hard. -<i> There's clearly
a disconnection here.</i> I mean Dave is telling me
that he has to be up for 24 hours <i> so that he can
look after the kids.</i> <i> There needs to be a change
in the schedule.</i> - Hi, can you please go
in the living room? - No.
- Don't pick him up. Please don't pick him up. - He won't go. - Lucy,
hands to yourself, please. Thank you. - So you have a babysitter? - Any time I get a babysitter, get the kids situated, go out and leave it's, you know, it's hard for us. The last date we went on
was literally drive to a restaurant, put the food in our bag, go to the movie, and we ate
while we watched the movie. - And an ideal date
would be what, Nina? - Maybe something
we've never done before together just to reconnect. - But you said the operative--
- Yes. - --word there is connect. - Yes, we--
- You feel like that hasn't happened?
- No. We're two people
living in a house, taking care of four kids. - Okay. So now we're talking about something different. And what I'm hearing is that there's no time
between you and him, that you just feel like
you've become mom. - Mm-hmm. For sure.
- And not sexy Nina. - No.
- Not the woman that he fell in love with. - Not at all.
- Right? - Right.
You know, we were happy. We did things together
and we were on the same page and we talked all the time
and we went to, you know, do things together.
- I want the iPad, mommy. - We are not playing
with the iPad. I am talking.
- I want-- - No, she did not. The iPad has been in my room
all morning. Nice try. Please go in the living room.
- Mommy. - [mumbles] Goodbye. - [crying] Let's go. It's not a game. -<i> She's lost the connection</i> with her husband, overwhelmed
with raising the kids <i> and I think the kids
can feel the distance</i> <i> because mom's in this space</i> <i> where she's up
to her wit's end.</i> Emotionally,
how have you been feeling? - Oh, I'm drowning
on the inside for sure. For sure. - We're going
to get that going, okay? - Come here. I wanna ask you a question. I'm gonna ask you
some questions. If mommy says,
"Clear up your toys," do you clear up your toys? But not all the time, do you? - Yeah,
because toys are very hard. - Toys are very hard, are they? So bedtime is here.
- Yeah. Bedtime is supposed to be
no later than 8:30 because I have to start--
- 8:30? - Yeah.
- [laughing] 8:30? No. Nice try.
8:00. And what do I always say to you? - What?
- Come on, Dave. It's 7:50. Come on, Dave.
It's 7:55. Come on, Dave. Lollygag.
Yeah. - But she's not even
letting me finish what I'm--what I'm saying.
- Oh. Okay. I'll let him finish. - So at about like even
between 8:00 and 8:30, that's when I have to start,
you know, making sure that I'm-- that - for me to leave
on time to work because I can't be late for work.
- Mm-hmm. So you only stop
because you've got to think about yourself
and getting ready for work? - Yeah. Yeah.
- Otherwise, you'd carry on? - Probably. -<i> Both these parents
are not respecting</i> <i> what the other needs</i> and it has led
to underlining resent and complacency. And resent and complacency are poison arrows
in any marriage. I can see you
brushing Emily's hair and a thousand thoughts
are running through your head. What's going on, David? - I find myself, like, arguing with her, and I tell her all the time,
like, stop yelling at me in front of the children.
She just-- she's like she doesn't care. - If you were to open up
and just tell her how you feel, how do you think
she would react? - That's kind of hard to say
because I never had that conversation with her. We're just stuck in this rut of what we call everyday life. - This is the last page and then it's time for bed,
okay? - Bedtime is just
too complicated for these parents. They both have different ideas <i> on how to do it. </i>
- All right. Nora, give me that book.
Let's put it away. It's time for bed. No, it's time for bed. - You wanna read that?
Come here. Let's sit
under the light though. Come here. So I can see. - They finagled daddy
into another book. - With mom,
it's like, "It's bed. "No nonsense. "Off you go."
- Who is this? - Pete.
- Good job, girl. -<i> With dad, he's lenient.</i> He is worried
about how they may feel. <i> And kids are never
going to say no</i> <i>to spending more time with dad.</i> - Go say goodnight to daddy. - You always say
goodnight to me. - I always say
goodnight to you. - Oh, here. ♪ Skinamarinky dinky dink ♪ Skinamarinky doo ♪ I love you - [laughing] <i> They seem to have
their bedtime routine down.</i> It's just the actual
leaving the room. I am off. But I'll be back tomorrow
to sit down and talk to you both.
- Okay. Okay. - <i> It's been a great day
observing the family.</i> <i> I've got to see a lot.</i> They have very serious,
real issues. <i> As parents, it's about doing
what's right for the kids,</i> alongside how they treat
one another. Goodnight. - Thank you, Jo.
- Thank you. It's time to change, and I hope tomorrow will be the beginning of that.
- [insects chirping] [music] -<i> Today, I will be speaking
to Nina and David,</i> <i> starting off
with a parental consultation.</i> - Oh, good morning.
- Hi. - Hello.<i>
I felt that I wouldn't be abe</i> - <i> to have their full
concentration,</i> so the children
are now being babysat. - [inhaling] Breathe. I can feel--
- [laughing] - --the tense energy. It's going to be okay. But we have to identify, right?
- Yes. - Right.
- So that we can own this and then move forward. And so I do wanna talk
about your relationship first and foremost.
- Okay. - This is your schedule, okay?
- Mm-hmm. - We've got you, Dave, working your graveyard shift, right?
- Yes. - Which is the major large
income of money that's coming in here.
- Mm-hmm. - Right?
But then, Nina, you took home work. I wanna bring this
to your attention visually because we got to start
getting realistic here. Dave needs to sleep from working
that graveyard shift and now having to be
looking after the children because you decide
that you wanna go to work now. And to me,
it doesn't make sense. - We use the money
to pay for the girls', like, extracurricular activities or for us to do
something family-like, so. - But at what cost
to the two of you? Where is your time together? - There's been occasions
where she's had the day off and she has chosen
to go to work, too. - Because I like to make money. - You want everything
at no cost. Nina, that ain't gonna happen. The pair of you both,
emotionally, are not being fed. Dave, your wife is craving emotional intimacy. But Nina, you're not gonna get any attention
when you're so stressed that you say things
that you can't take back. - And you can't deny the fact
that you have said things to me that are way out of line. - I don't deny it,
but you make me mad, so sometimes I say things that-- - And you seem to, like,
you talk to me, shouldn't we reward you
by doing nice things for you? You wanna know why
that it is the way it is? It's because of how
you make me feel, the way that I've been treated in front of my own kids
and--by you. - You both are not getting what you need
in the relationship. And all I see is when two people
do not get what they both need
in a relationship, they put all the emphasis
on the kids. What are you gonna do
when the kids are grown up? And now you've got no kids
to look after anymore? You're gonna stare
at each across the dining table and not even know
who each other are anymore. And it doesn't create
a home environment where the kids can thrive. Now, the bedtime routine, you guys do very well. But David lollygagging upstairs, it's about you--
- Yeah. - --and not about them.
- Them. Right. - A lot of the things
that you wanna do for your children are also attached to how you can
emotionally recall how you felt as a child, with the way that your dad chose to interact with you. But you're not your dad.
- Right. - You're you. And the way that you choose
to parent your children, you'll take the good bits and you'll leave
the bad bits behind. You got lovely kids, and really beautiful children. Like each of the little ones, the personality and characters. But you both just need to see
eye-to-eye with your parenting opinions so you can give them
the stability they need. So enjoy the experience. I'm not gonna tell you
it's gonna be a walk in the park because sometimes
it's not gonna be. - Right.
- But the fact is, is that you both really,
really want this. -<i> It felt really good
being able to talk to Jo</i> and for her to understand
how we both feel. -<i> It was surprising</i> because I thought
it was all gonna be about Dave. [laughs] To be honest. <i> Right now,
I'm feeling excited</i> <i> to move forward</i> and make our family better for the future. [music] - What are guys up to? Where are we?
- We're getting dinner going. - Sounds fun. The Bean family
are trying to balance <i> raising their four kids</i> <i> and their complicated
work schedule.</i> But I do have some thoughts
on how to get this situation underhand. So David, you've been not feeling like you're getting quality time and you have to look
in your routine, see the time that you have
with the kids and make the most of it.
- Okay. - You might get a moment where you run an errand or you decide to go somewhere
and say, "Right, "I'm just gonna take Nora
for now somewhere half an hour." - Right.
- And that happens sporadically with all the kids.
- Right. -<i> David needs to be consistent</i> spending time with the kids that is not at bedtime so it doesn't affect
their bedtime, <i>even if it's just spending time</i> with one or two of them
at once. So Dave, you take that time
right now with the kids. Nina, come and talk to me
in the dining room. <i> Today, I showed
David and Nina a chart</i> revolving around
their working schedules to illustrate
just how complicated it is. <i> Now they're gonna have
to figure out</i> <i> what to do about it.</i> Tonight, I want you to be able
to look at this, really sit and think about this. If Dave is going to work
every evening and after work, he needs to sleep.
- Mm-hmm. - Right? This Wednesday
doesn't make sense. David goes to work, gets home,
and he's up all the way until then
because you go to work. - I do work a lot,
but it's, like, really quick. But then we don't have
that extra money that comes in. - That, I get it, right? Making ends meet. And if you have to work to make ends meet,
you have to work. But you're telling me
that you only work because you wanna pay
for all the kids' extra stuff. And then you're exhausted
from it. You can't say yes
to everything. What's more important
for you right now? - My family and my husband. - I'm all for women who
wanna be out there and work, but it's either
one or the other. At the least, you could stop
working Wednesdays so David could get some sleep. - I'm just afraid
if I tell them that I, like, let's say
don't work Wednesdays, that there's gonna be, like,
"All right. You're done."
- And then what? - And then I don't have a job. - It's not gonna stay
like that forever. You know that Nora's gonna
end up at pre-K, so will Dylan, and then you know when
they're at school, that's it. You're gonna be out there
getting a job, you ain't gonna sit at home. - Yeah. I will definitely
text her tomorrow. <i> I will ask
for Wednesdays off completely.</i> - I agree with you. -<i> A reality check
kind of hit home.</i> <i> Hopefully,
my boss would be understanding</i> and realize
that family does come first, and I wanna do everything I can to be more present
in the kids' life and also in Dave's life as well. - It's bedtime. Go up the stairs and you do a story, all right? And then it's, like,
"It's bedtime now, okay? "So time for sleep
and I'll see you in the morning, "I love you," kiss the kids.
- Okay. - And then come out. All right?
- Okay. Okay. - <i> Dad has a real problem</i> <i> detaching from the kids
at bedtime.</i> - Let's go read book. - As mom would put it, he lollygags around <i> and draws out bedtime.</i> Well, let's just see
if he can do it better tonight. - Which one do you take? - That.
- The dog, right? Hey, girls.
Can you get in your beds and wait for me, please? Get in your bed. - [cries]
- Okay. I'm gonna put you in here
and I'm gonna go get mommy, okay?
- [crying] - Hang on. Okay. [ speaking indistinctly ]
- Goodnight. - It's all right. Goodnight, Emily. I'll see you
in the morning, okay? -<i> To see mom and dad
working together</i> <i> on the bedtime routine,
it's really great.</i> Dad. He's the one that needed
the coaching, not the kids. But he did do it. So, well done. Get a good night's sleep. I'll see you in the morning. Tomorrow's another day. What do you need both right now? - Sleep. [laughs] - I think he's got
a crush on you. Let her - you work that out.
- No. - Oh. I'll give you a hug.
- Hmm. That's what she needs more
from you. Good night.
- [laughter] [music] - Nora? Can you please
eat your sandwich now? - Hello. I'm back in the house
helping the family. Did you finish your lunch?
- Yeah. I ate the crust, too. - You ate the crust, too? <i> I wanna see how well they do
with the kids,</i> <i> especially around discipline.</i> From what I've seen,
the kids just act out to get their parents' attention. Emily's finished, you finished. Nora, how are you doing? - Nora, sit up in your chair,
please. Nora, sit up, please.
- Okay. - Nora?
- Firm voice, please. - Nora?
Please sit up in your chair so you can eat your food. Nora, can you please sit up
in your chair so you can eat your food?
- I need you to listen to daddy and sit in your chair upright. - Nora.
- You are not listening, that's not good.
- [whines] - All right.
So I need you to be assertive. So take her off the chair, bring her over to the side, and with a low tone, firm voice, tell her, "Your behavior
is being naughty." So you need to tell her
with your assertive voice that you're not happy how
she's behaving, Dave, not okay. - [crying]
- Nora, I'm not happy with the way
you're behaving today. - [crying] - Nora, stand up.
- [crying] - Nora, stand up. Nora, stand up. Nora, stand up.
Nora. -<i> David is worried
about reprimanding the kids</i> and what they'll think
about him. But it's not about him. <i> It's about what's right
for the children.</i> - Stand up.
- Tell him what you need to tell her, short and sharp. - Okay.
- And then right, we're going off to bed. Unfortunately,
Nora's suffering for your decisions right now. Come with me. Leave her there. How are you gonna change
anything? - Yeah. I have to. - No, listen to me, seriously. How are you gonna change
anything? [music] - How are you gonna change
anything? You asked me here to help you. Trust me when I tell you, this is a mock temper tantrum. She wants to get her own way.
- All right. - And you can talk
till the cows come home, but if you can't walk the talk, then those kids
won't respect you. They won't listen to you. You got this. <i> I know that when David
finishes work,</i> he wants to come home, spend time with the kids, <i> and have fun.</i> <i> But being a push-over
is not gonna do the kids</i> any favors in the long run. - Walk. Nora, stand up, stand up. - [crying] - Nora, stand up. Nora, stand up. - He emotionally looks like
he's just gonna burst into tears
every time that they cry. <i> And somewhere along the line</i> <i> it's connected
with him and his dad.</i> [music] - So... how old were you
when your dad left? - Well,
my mom and dad separated, I was about 8 or 9.
- Mm-hmm. And what's your relationship
like with your dad? Did he make you feel he cared? - No. Nope. And as weird as it may sound,
I accepted it. - I beg to differ. I think it's a big component with how you choose
to parent your children. As a child you felt rejected,
you felt abandoned, and the fear
is that you think that if you behave
a certain way and you see
your children cry that you think
that that crying will make them look at you in a space where
they won't want to know you. - I can see that. - You've got to find
a space of peace for it not to disable you, because of fear
that your own children are going to reject you,
abandon you, never want to speak
to their father. You're teaching them
right from wrong. You're teaching them to listen
and to be respectful. You are present,
you are there with them. You are home. [music] - It's nothing like... the actions of your father. You are a very different man, a very different father in the way that you raise
your own children. You never had a chance
to tell them all the things you wanted
to tell them, did you? - Nope. -<i> I think Dave
has to come to terms with</i> what he can and can't control with respects
to his own father, <i> and find somehow
some peace with that.</i> I would like you to write a letter
to your father. What we're gonna do
is we're gonna take what's been sitting here
for how long? - Thirty years.
- Thirty years. That's been sitting in there,
festering for too long and you're gonna put it on paper
while I'm not here. - Okay. - Okay. - Thank you. [cries] -<i> Dave has another chance</i> <i> to really tell his dad
how he feels.</i> I hope that Dave will rest, be at peace more over time, <i> and hopefully
he'll be in a better space,</i> <i> so that he can do</i> what he needs to do
with his own children. [music] -<i> Mom and dad, come with me.</i> Wanna have some fun? Want a new adventure? Open it up
and see what it says. 5:45 PM tonight. - So scrub up. Put your fancy black shirt on. - All right.
- Okay. Grandma is on her way, she's gonna take over
with the kids and you guys are gonna
put your glam clothes on, get yourself
all shh, shh, shh ready, and have some fun. Hello.
- Hi. - Hi, nice to meet you.
- Nice meeting you. - It's been a long time
since David and Nina have spent time alone together. <i> I just hope this evening
will be the start of rekindling</i> them spending more time together
and enjoying that. - You like that? - I look beautiful?
- Yeah. -<i> Definitely excited.</i> <i> I'm glad to try something new,</i> this would be good. Good building step for us, you know,
in the right direction, you know
bettering our marriage. - Bye-bye, Daddy.
- I love you, okay. - Bye, Daddy.
- See you later. [music] - Hello.
- Hello. - Thank you.
- Nice to meet both of you guys. Michael, can we have just
a little bit of music, yeah? [salsa music plays] - Five, six, seven. One, two, three,
and one, two, three. One, two, three,
and one, two, put on your back, Nina,
three. -<i> I thought for sure
he would be worse than me</i> but apparently
you are a good dancer. So you learn something new
every day already. - You're not so bad yourself. - One, two, three. -<i> I think
we're gonna be open now</i> to doing other things.
- More spontaneous things. - Besides movies and dinner.
- Yeah. <i> It's definitely refreshing
coming out</i> <i> and doing something new,</i> <i> puts a different mood to us.</i> - Oh, thanks. [salsa music plays] [applause] [music] - You want this one to color?
We're gonna go on the table and you're gonna color
on the table, okay? - Good morning.
- Good morning. - Good morning, how are you?
- How are you? - Good, how are you guys? It's my last teach day. <i> There needs
to be follow through</i> if Nina's speaking to her boss
about the over schedule <i> because she's gonna
cut back a little bit.</i> Did you speak to her?
- No. No, not yet. She always says to text her. - When it's something
that's important you call. This texting
I think is your fear from actually picking up
the phone and talking to her. It's just a professional courtesy consideration.
- I know. I am feeling a little nervous <i> to speak with my boss.</i> <i> Hopefully my boss
is understanding</i> <i> but I don't know
what to expect.</i> - That phone call. - I don't like you right now. Hi, how are you? I called because... I have such
a busy work schedule that I don't spend
any time with the family. So I am proposing to you if I could possibly have
Wednesdays off. Yeah.
That's understandable. I will see you soon
and we'll discuss this further. But I'm glad
that I called you. Okay, bye. - Good?
- Yes. She said that
they just hired someone and she'll be able
to give up my Wednesday. - Okay. That's good. It's really great news
to hear that mom got that Wednesday off <i> because it means that David</i> <i> will not have to stay up
for 24 hours.</i> <i> Plus Nina
will get the chance</i> to spend more focus time
with the kids and David. I mean, who doesn't like
the sound of that? - That was so easy. - Picking up the phone
and calling? - Yeah.
- Oh yeah. Yeah. -<i> I'm gonna put Nora down
for a nap right now.</i> -
-<i> Have a good little nap.</i> <i> Yeah. </i> - Nina, both said to me we don't have time to talk
and to hand over what's been going on
with the kids. So the quickest way
you can do that is to video talking
to your phone, say, this is
what's being going on. And then send it
to the other person. - Okay.
- Because this is the time you are gonna stop
getting up dad. - Okay.
- All right. Because I think you should hand over now to give you enough time. Due to the overloaded
work schedule, really Nina and David
didn't have much time <i> to talk about what's going on
with their days</i> <i> when they were
with the children,</i> <i> and so I want them
to get into the habit</i> of talking
to the video chat. - Do you have
my video message? - Yup.
- All right. Cool. [music] - Get this fork for Nora, okay? Can you all put them
on the table for me by the plates? [music] - Hi, let's keep up
this nice temperament here. Okay? [music] - Eat your sandwich, hon,
take a bite. You can bite. - Stop messing around...
- Put your hand down right here. - ...and eat up right now. - You eat. Bite it. - Lucy?
- Take her away from the table for a minute. - Come put your sandwich down.
- Like you're just correcting picky.
- Come here. - You need to speak
to her right now, take her by the kitchen
and tell her. - Come here.
- Good girl, Nora, keep eating, please. - You need to eat your food. Look at me
when I am talking to you that way I know
that you understand what I'm telling you.
So what are you gonna do when you go sit back
at that table? - Eat.
- Look at me. Look at me. What are you gonna do
when you sit at that table? - Eat.
- That's right, okay? Come on. Walk in there quietly,
not along the wall, you are going to walk
like a little girl, okay, and walk in there
and I want you to go sit down at the table. You want--just a little bit
at a time, in here,
let 'em all pass real quick. - Good girl.
- Good job. - That's it,
well done, keep going. - I pulled Lucy aside
and I had a firm <i> but fair voice with her,</i> <i> and like that
this is like the first time</i> <i> she actually like</i> really like tuned in
and was listening to me. <i> It's a little hard
to get used to</i> but I know that the more
that it's implemented I think the easier
it's gonna get. - Clean up the kitchen, right? Get that done because mom
is gonna be home, so it can be nice for her
to see that clean. [music] - Hello, girls.
- Mommy. - Can I have a big hug? Hi. - You ate dinner already? - Wow.
Did you eat all your food? - Mm-hmm.
- Hey. - Why? - You're not in trouble. I just wanted
to say thank you because I noticed
that the dishes were done and you did dinner and... I appreciate that. - Yeah.
- So thank you. - Daddy. - Always you're welcome. - So I'll be leaving
for a couple of days. - Okay.
- Jo, be careful out there, it's...
- Yeah. I know, yeah. - It'd be a challenge,
given the fact that she's not gonna be here
guiding us <i> it's really
gonna test us to see</i> <i> if we can do this on our own.</i> - See you in a couple days. Good night, lovey. - <i> I hope that Dave and I</i> can use our skills
that she gave us and I hope that it turns out,
you know, better. - Take care.
- Jo, thank you so much. - All right. Do good, okay? This family
is really making headway <i> so they need to remember
what they've been taught</i> and keep following through otherwise you know
where it will be for this family
if they don't, back down that slippery slope. Bye. [music] -<i> So I've been away
for two days.</i> <i> I have left the Bean family</i> <i> to get on with the techniques</i> <i> and the advice
they've been given.</i> <i> I really do hope</i> <i> that they have
followed through.</i> So I guess we'll see. Hello, how are you?
- Hello, good, nice to see you. I'm excited for her to come in
and review stuff but I'm also a little nervous <i> because maybe
something we missed</i> <i> that we need to change</i> but that's why she's here,
she's here to help us. - She's laughing already.
- I'm not you gonna let-- the suspense. So we'll take a look at this. [music] - We don't--we do not--
we do not climb up there. Lucy.
- Daddy. - Wait, Lucy, don't-- Lucy, can you look at me,
please? - What's wrong
with that image there? - He's not... - I'm not at her level.
- Yeah. - Stop messing around.
Come on. Lucy. - Look at me, eat your food. - So the fact
that mom had to come in, no good.
- I know. - Because it will
undermine you, right? You're not doing the job that
you're supposed to be doing. Nina's looking like,
you like, "Dave, step up." Right? That's what had you both
at base one with me when Nina
was sitting there going, "No, this is making me
feel resentful." - Yeah.
- "Because Dave is not "stepping up." So I'd like to see that. All right, let's look at
your parental review. [music] -<i> Dinner went well,</i> Emily had helped me
with clean up by putting the dishes
in the sink then we worked
on their snowman projects for their schools, <i> and I'm on my way out
right now.</i> - How is it a benefit? - Just so
we don't miss anything, I feel like missing so much, being like,
"Oh, how is your day?" "Good." Boom. And nothing was said about... - The detail.
- Yeah. - Your conversations are split, you start off to say something,
and what's that? You're like this. Continue doing the video, but don't miss
saying hi to one another and hugging each other
before you leave. - Right.
- Always room for improvement. However,
great work the pair of you, you've done really well,
you really have. You've put the effort in
and you've got the results and that's what it's all about. <i> I think both parents
have made tremendous progress</i> but I have to say
it's been wonderful to watch David's journey, <i> I do know that he spent time
writing a letter,</i> put down on paper,
what he'd been holding, uh, emotionally for so many years
about his father. You spent time
writing a letter, what did it do for you
writing that letter? - It allowed me to let
a lot of things go, it's like I never realize
it like that-- holding onto that
is somehow affecting the way that I'm raising
my own children. - I wondered if you'd like
to share any of that letter? - It resurfaced
a lot of things of how I reflected back
on my childhood as, you know, of him being there
and not being there, like, it just feels... so refreshing knowing
that I can move past this now in my life
and just being concentrating on what I'm trying to do. - Maybe you just needed
that chance to get what was buried in here.
- Yeah. - For 30 years up and on paper.
- Yeah. - And that I'm proud of you
for doing. - Thank you so much.
- At least you have done that and that's important.
- Thank you. - You're welcome. - I mean, not only helping us
with our children but helping me and Nina
with our marriage, and me with this is--
it's a lot, you're great. - Oh, thank you very much. I appreciate your kind words.
- Yeah. <i> I was a little worried
coming into this</i> but since Jo's been here, I felt my confidence grow
as a parent, <i> and Nina and I have both</i> <i> really been working hard
together as a team,</i> and I'm feeling positive
that we can definitely move in the right direction
of keeping this going. -<i> It was an eye-opener to see</i> what we thought
was the right way and to actually see <i> how to do it the right way.</i> <i> We have a little bit
more work to do,</i> <i> I know it's not
gonna happen overnight</i> <i> but I look forward
to spend more time</i> <i> and to reconnect with David.</i> - Bye darling,
I'll give you a hug. Bye my love. <i> It has been
a really lovely journey</i> <i> with this family.</i> Take care. <i> They have been so open
to the process.</i> Thank you.
- Thank you. - Thank you for allowing me
to come and help you. <i> When I first arrived,</i> there was a lot
of guarded feelings, <i> overloaded work schedule,</i> <i> and the biggest thing
is the communication.</i> Bye love. - Thank you nanny Jo.
- Thank you nanny Jo. - <i> Now, they're in a better plae
than what they were.</i> It's continuing the good work
that they've done. <i> I am feeling very hopeful
for this family.</i> <i> Next time on Supernanny.</i> - Life with three children
is tough. -<i> Meal times are difficult.</i> - I'm not eating it. - Smell it. Don't you throw up on me. Stop hitting me. I wish they would respect me. - What was that discipline? - We definitely don't have
the shared vision of our styles. You're gonna eat all of it. - I don't like it. - I know honey. - You literally
just made us the bad cops, how are you going to undo that?
