Christ In The Home – Wives | Colossians 3:18 | Pastor John Miller

going to read the whole passage the scripture that we're going to take for the next four weeks but then come back to verse 18 so I want you to follow with me closely in your Bible Paul says wives submit yourselves unto your own husband's as it is fit or fitting in the Lord husbands you are to love your wives and be not bitter against them children obey your parents and all things but this is well pleasing unto the Lord father's provoke not your children to anger lest they be discouraged servants obey in all things your masters according to the flesh not with eyeservice as men pleasers but in singleness of heart fearing God whatever you do do it heartily or with all your heart as to the Lord and me not into men knowing that of the Lord you shall receive a reward of the inheritance for you are serving the Lord Christ but he that does wrong shall receive for the wrong which he hath done and there is no respect of persons chapter 4 verse 1 masters given to your servants that was just an equal knowing that you also have a master in heaven storia soul of a seven-year-old girl who had just for the first time seen the movie Cinderella and she was testing her neighbor's knowledge of the story the neighbor was anxious to impress the little girl with her knowledge of the story of Cinderella and said I know what happened at the end what said the little girl the neighbor said well the Cinderella and the prince they lived happily ever after and the girl with the frown on her view said oh no they didn't they got married you know there's no doubt about it the marriage has fallen on hard times happily married couples are an oddity in our culture today it wasn't that long ago that even the Supreme Court of the United States changed the definition of marriage and now we have same-sex so-called marriage and I think we're floundering as a culture wanting to know what really is marriage and how to define marriage and what does it mean to be a married person what was the pattern or designer well what is marriage really all about and many are abandoning the institution of marriage and just not even getting married all together I think marriage is the divine institution created by God and God has given us the Divine Design in his word as to what makes a blessed and happy and fruitful and successful marriage but I want to ask an answer the question why is marriage so difficult today and I believe the answer is one little word starts with an S si n sin the theologians call it the fall of man back in the book of beginnings the book of Genesis God made man and God made the woman he brought them together the two became one wasn't long afterward that we know the story Satan tempted Eve and he ate of the pee ate of the fruit she gave unto her husband and he ate and this is what's called the fall man fell into sin the Bible is clear it teaches that thus everyone born out of Adam afterwards was under that curse and so because of the curse and because of the fall we live in a sinful selfish world and we have odd time relating to each other because of our emptiness and of our alienation so a person gets married and they're empty and they're alienated and it affects their relationship in the marriage relationship but I believe there's hope for us in Jesus Christ that we can be forgiven that we can have the power of his spirit fill our hearts and fill our lives in the context of Colossians 3 Paul has already told us to put off the old man with his deeds that's the old sinful lifestyle and his patterns and to put on the new man which is the new nature created after the image of Jesus Christ and if we do that we saw three things will happen I want you to see this in verse 15 we saw that the Peace of Christ will be ruling in our hearts in verse 16 we saw that the word of Christ will be dwelling in us with songs and hymns and spiritual songs will be singing making melody in our hearts to the Lord and then in verse 17 the name of Christ will be glorified him and we looked at that last Sunday the Peace of Christ the word of Christ and the name of Christ but I want you to note that the results of that is verse 18 wise will be subject to their husbands and verse 19 husbands will love their wives in verse 20 children will obey their parents think about that what an awesome thought obedient children in our culture today it's like I've never heard of such a thing and parents verse 21 will not provoke their children to anger Paul says in the parallel passage of Ephesians 5 but they'll bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord and then verse 22 servants or employees will obey their masters are their employers and employers chapter 4 verse 1 will give unto their employees that which is just and right and equal the point being that Jesus changes everything amen when Jesus comes into our hearts and to our homes he changes everything I'm just warming up to verse 18 by the way and this is a real note-taking sermon I want you to write these down there are four things that Jesus brings into our marriages he brings his presence he brings his power he brings his purpose and he brings his pattern notice in verse 17 look at look at your Bible with me for just a the reference to the Lord Jesus he says do all in the name of the Lord Jesus giving thanks to God and the Father by him and then again in verse 18 as it is fit in the Lord and then jump down to verse 24 this is well pleasing unto the Lord and then I want you to notice in verse 23 and whatsoever you do do it hardly as to the Lord and not unto men then notice verse 24 knowing that of the Lord you shall receive a reward for the inheritance where you serve the Lord Jesus Christ then jump down to chapter 4 and verse 1 he closes knowing that you also have a master in heaven and again that master is none other than the Lord Jesus Christ so when you become a Christian there's a new presence in your marriage marriage is not just two it's three and the Bible says a three-fold cord is not easily broken so Jesus needs to be the center of your marriage relationship he brings his power right down Ephesians 5:18 where Paul says be filled with the Holy Spirit then he goes right in that parallel passage to speak about wives submit to your husbands and husbands love your wives and then thirdly he brings a new purpose I want you to notice in Colossians 3:17 says we do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus so the purpose of your marriage and this is kind of foundational for you married folk this morning is to glorify Jesus your marriage is to bring honor and glory to Jesus Christ so you have a purpose and we have a new pattern fourthly a new pattern in Ephesians 5 verse 24 he says as the church is subject to Christ so let the wives be to their own husband's in everything and then in Ephesians 5 verse 25 he says husbands love your wives even as Christ loved the church and gave himself for it until Christ came into the world we didn't have this pattern now the pattern as the church is subject to Christ so the wife is subject to her husband and as the Lord gave himself for the church so the husband gives himself in sacrificial love to his wife so if we as Christians are going to change the world I believe we must start by changing our homes and that starts with our marriages marriage as the foundation of the home and the home is the foundation of society now Paul first speaks to the wives in verse 18 wives submit yourselves unto your own husband's as it is fit in the Lord and I confess I've been preaching a long time but anytime I preach to just wives one verse on submission I do so with a little bit of fear and trepidation and I got my car running backstage if I have to make an exit here after church you know whatever I officiate a wedding we get unbelievers come in for the wedding and you know non-christian family members and I read from Ephesians it says wife submit to your husbands if looks could kill I would have been dead a thousand times over you can see the hair stand up on the back of their did that preacher just say submit use the S word can't believe that what came did he just crawl out of I mean people literally cannot believe that I would say that it's like hey I didn't say it I read it it's called the Bible don't shoot me I'm just the errand boy I'm just passing on them I'm just reading the Bible you read the Bible in a freak out well that's in the Bible and I want to I want you to make sure that you see it right there verse 18 it's in the scriptures wives submit yourselves unto your own husband's as to the Lord now I want you to note in one simple statement one verse he deals with the wives one verse verse 18 he deals with the husbands one verse verse 20 deals with the children and one verse verse 21 he deals with the parents so Paul isn't messing around here he minimizes his words and he gets right to the point and he's talking about basic essential foundational truths now I want to point out a few things marriage is a wife and a husband look at verse 18 wives submit yourselves into your own what husbands now I realize today that those that promote same-sex marriage define any sex as playing the role of a wife or husband if two men get married sometimes they'll say this one's the wife and that one's the husband and they convolute the passage here so I want you to be clear here that a wife is a female and a husband is a male and if you don't believe me then believe what Jesus said in Genesis chapter or Jesus said in Matthew chapter 19 Matthew chapter 19 verse 24 or verse 4 and 5 excuse me he says he which made them at the beginning made them male and female and he didn't stop and he says and for this cause a man will leave his father and mother cleave unto his wife and the two male and female become one flesh marriage is one man and one woman you can redefine it you can tear it apart change it do whatever you want I see these government paid for ads on the TV love is love and I'm thinking you have no idea what God's love is all about you can't change the definition of marriage and you can't change the definition of love and love is you know God's love is pure and holy and righteous as well so I wanted to make that clear and you know I've preached this text many many times but it never really stood out to me that he made clear that it's a wife and that it's a husband as he addresses married couples and he was writing to a culture the Roman Greek culture that was lately perverted Christianity brought new standards into the marriage relationship as never before known so Jesus makes it clear in Matthew 19 verse 4 and 5 that it's a male and a female now what is God's Word to the wives basically submit yourselves unto your own husband verse 18 now the word submit their means be submissive in the Greek and I want to share some things with you that are very very important he says be submissive or submit yourselves this is not a very popular subject today it's misunderstood I believe and and and I don't believe we have a right understanding of this concept of submission so what I want to do is I want to share with you five things submission is not and then I'm going to share with you seven things that submission is again if you're taking notes you can write them down first of all five things that submission is not submission is not merely a concept for women submission is not just a concept for women Ephesians 5:21 says submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God before he says wives submit and husband you love your wives as Christ loved the church he actually says that a husband and wife should be submitted to God in reverence and fear and they should be submitted to one another in a reverence and fear for God so there's a mutual sense of submission in first Peter chapter 5 and verse 5 it says likewise you younger submit yourselves in to the elders yet all of you be subject one to another be clothed with humility why because God resists the proud but God gives grace to the humble you know whatever happened to younger people respecting older people we've lost that in our culture today and even the Bible says you younger submit to the older all of you be subject one to another be clothed with humility God resists the proud but God gives grace to those our humble so submission is not just a concept for women and then secondly submission does not mean that the wife becomes a slave the minute you hear the word submit kind of in a word association you think of a slave but the truth is the wife is never more free than when she is in submission to her husband I want you to notice a little word in verse 18 wives submit yourselves unto your it's the word own Oh WN own husband's that word really jumped out from the passage to me this week I thought you know it could have been that he would have said wives submit yourselves to your husband's and that would have read just fine we wouldn't that never thought another thought about it but he says your own husbands why does he put the word own in there and how this is kind of cool you're submitting not to just some man out there in society you're not just submitting some Oh Gert some crazy person you're submitting to your husband you go well yeah but you don't know my husband people think you know if my husband would have been here when Paul wrote that he probably wouldn't have put it in the Bible but the word on just really spoke to my heart because I believe it's it's intentionally purposely meant to convey the he's your very own and why is when you think of your husband you need to think of him he's mine he's no one else's he's mine he's my very own husband and that's the individual that you're submitting to and your very own husband is to love you sacrificially and self-denying lee modeled by the love that jesus had for the church and gave himself for it so you're submitting to your very own husband he is yours he belongs to you and then thirdly I would say submission does not mean that a wife never opens your mouth never has an opinion and never gives advice we get this idea that a wife submitting means that she is to be seen but never heard this used to be busy working and serving but not speaking that she has no ideas or opinions or thoughts and yet the virtuous woman described in proverbs 31 verse 26 says that she opens her mouth with wisdom and her tongue is the law of kindness I like that she opens her mouth with wisdom so ladies if you speak speak with wisdom and be kind but I think a man would be a fool not to want to know his wife's feelings want to know his wife's opinions or ideas our views and my wife has ideas and wisdom in ways that I don't and you're wise to be able to draw from duds when Albert Einstein and his wife were celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary someone asked dr. Einstein - what do you attribute 50 years of successful marriage and Einstein said well we decided when we got married that I would make all the important decisions and she would make all the minor decisions and then he said but you know after 50 years of marriage there's never been an important decision kind of funny I've heard women say well if my husband's the head I'm the neck and I can turn him whatever way I want him to say he wears the pants but I tell him which ones to put a hot butt but again she has her ideas she hasn't she's got understanding and wisdom and you should draw from that you're a team submission does not mean fourthly that the wife must obey ungodly counsel write that down there are limits to submission if your husband has visions are you becoming Bonnie and Clyde the next Bonnie and Clyde you're going to rob the bank Columbus you know let's go rob a bank it's like no I must obey God rather than man or he wants you to do something that is immoral or contradicts God's Word you must obey God rather than MIT but just a little footnote there make sure that it's really a legitimate violation of God's Word not just he would like to have some mashed potatoes for dinner you know your husband says would you could make some mashed potatoes for you no it's like I'll rebuke you devil get behind me Satan not you notice that that's not ungodly or I'm scriptural or not not not even horrible I just thought I'd share that with you number five here's my last what it's not submission does not mean that the wife is inferior to the husband this is perhaps the most important negative point that I'll make this morning in no way does submission indicate inferiority the Bible says in 1st Peter chapter 3 verse 7 that they are heirs together of the grace of life husband and wife or heirs together of the grace of life God doesn't love the husband more than the wife God doesn't hear his prayers before her prayers the ground is level at the foot of the cross and husband and wife's can equally and their access to God and their blessings from God but still God has given order in the marriage so that there might be order in the home so the question now is what this omission actually mean the word submit is taken from the military concept genre I don't let that freak you out doesn't mean that the husband's to bark out orders and the wife must obey but it is a military word and this is what it literally means it means to arrange under means to arrange under it's for the purpose of order and function so if you're just going to define the actual word submit means to arrange under and the conveyed idea or concept is order and function order and function has nothing to do with superiority has everything to do with order and function and God is a God of order now let me give you seven facts about submission again we need to write these down let me say this I don't think I've in this it doesn't matter if you're a guy or a gal or married or single who are you you might find yourself counseling somebody praying with somebody if you're young and single you haven't gotten married yet you going to get married everyone needs to know what the Bible teaches about marriage submission and a husband's love for his wife and we need to know these principles no matter where you're at so I want you to write these down number one the wife submission to her husband is voluntary voluntary notice verse 18 submit your cells he could have just said submit no he said submit yourselves why because it indicates a voluntary action you choose and we're going to see in a minute to be obedient to God and you choose the husband can't command his wife to submit she has to voluntarily submit herself some translate that be in subjection number two the wives submission to her husband is an imperative it's command in the Greek it's what's called an imperative so it's not a suggestion it's a command wives submit yourselves it's command of God's commands or for our good and for his glory and we need to obey and trust God you say well what if my husband makes a decision that's really a bad decision that's when you have to trust God I have wives come to me and they're all freaking out my husband wants to do this and it's crazy and I don't want to really do it you know but I know I'm supposed to miss him it what should i do how can i circumvent my husband or get in to change his mind well you can share with him you can communicate your feelings together and then you trust in the Lord amen we talked about the shield of faith Wednesday night and our study the armor of God and there comes a point in time in all of our lives where we just we just flat-out need to trust God you can trust God to take care of your husband you can trust God to take care of your wife you can trust God to take care of your choice you can trust God to take care of your health you can trust God to take care of your finances but you have to trust him and when you trust him then God will go to work so we need to put it in God's hands then I want you to notice that thirdly a wife submission is to be continuous in the Greek this is in the present tense when he says wives submit yourselves it's in the present tense in the Greek and that means that it's ongoing continually that is to be a lifestyle that you're to continually ongoingly be submitting and that means that you submit you know things you might not want to and the things you want you if your husband says let's go shopping and buy you a new dress oh yes Ani I submit then he asked something else of you is like no no no no no no I I don't do windows I don't clean windows I I don't vacuum but it's something that's to be continuous it's a lifestyle number four write this down number four the wife submission to her husband is to as a positive concept I believe that it's a positive concept you notice in verse 18 this is not what she's not supposed to do this is all about what she's supposed to do it's positive it's not negative wives submit yourselves unto your own husband's the the command is positive a wife submission to her husband has been described as and I love this definition the freedom to be creative under divinely appointed Authority submission means the wife puts all of her talents abilities resources energies at her husband's disposal submission means that the wife yields and uses all of her abilities under the management of her husband for the good of her husband and the family and that's a freeing liberating concept remember in Genesis chapter 2 verse 18 the Lord said it is not good that man should be alone I will make a what a what helper suitable for him god looked at Adam and said free paraphrase dude needs help big time I mean I look at some of the men around here and I go thank God they have a life dresses impedes them fixes some of domestication and there's so many guys need domesticated get married dude and gotten to fit Adam and he said not good man's aloneness I'm going to make a helper and he said suitable for him so God created the life to be a helper or a helpmeet suitable for Adam so the wife finds her purpose in her role but number five the wife submission write this down the wife submission to her husband I believe it enables leadership it enables leadership a lot of women say well my husband doesn't take the lead in the home and sometimes not always because the wife isn't submitting and a lot of times that will open the door for him to be able to take his leadership so ladies your submission allows your husband to demonstrate loving leadership in the home shortly after their marriage are currently after her marriage excuse me to Prince Albert Queen Victoria and her husband had a quarrel and Albert walked out of the room and locked himself in his private apartment Victoria hammered furiously at the door who's there called Albert the Queen of England and she demands to be admitted there was no response the door remained lock and Victoria hammered again who's there Albert inquired the reply was the same in the door remained shut but furiously fruitlessly Victoria continued to knock was followed by the same pause and there was a gentle tap then finally who's there Albert said your wife Albert the Queen replied then the prince open the door at once you know I believe that when you are submissive that it opens the door it opens the door to communication it opens the door of an able mint it enables your husband to take that leadership and is a great responsibility and I believe that the more you submit the more your husband will rise to the occasion number six submission involves the attitude as well as the action it's not just submitting yourselves it's doing it with the right attitude because God looks not just under actions but he looks at what he looks at our hearts God wants you to do it with the right attitude in Ephesians 5 verse 33 Paul concludes that parallel passage and he says the wife let her see that she respects her husband in the King James it's reverences her husband better translation would be respects her husband you say well he's not respectful but I believe that you still need to respect his position there are two themes from verse 18 of chapter three 2 verse 1 of chapter 4 and those two themes we don't like them today but there's so much needed in our culture is authority and Submission Authority and Submission Authority and Submission whether it be in the home parents husband wife parents children children learning to submit to Authority or whether it be in the workplace employees employers that those two themes run through that whole passage and so God has ordained that in the home the wife be subject and submitted to or husband and here's number seven write it down the wives submission to her husband is a spiritual matter and if you miss this you miss everything ladies your submission to your husband is a spiritual matter notice it in our text go with me to verse 18 wives submit yourselves to your own husbands as it is fit or fitting or proper in the Lord notice how he ties the Lord together this is fitting or pleasing unto the Lord in Ephesians 5:18 it says as unto the Lord this is what I call the mission of submission you got that there's actually a mission in your submission the mission of your submission is that you're going to do it is unto the lord you're going to do it in obedience to god you're going to do it because you want to please the lord i believe you submit out of obedience to god that you submit out of love for god you submit because you want to please God and you submit because you want to glorify God it's all about the Lord I already pointed out to you the references to the Lord all the way through this passage and when you Christ comes into your heart he also comes into your home and he brings his presence and he brings his power he brings his purpose he brings his pattern it's all about Jesus Christ and a wife submission is all done out of obedience to Jesus Christ and this is the motive of submission Jesus said it like this in John 14:15 he said if you love me you will keep my what if you love me you will keep my Commandments never as a wife demonstrating more her love for God when she is living in subjection and obedience to God's Word by submitting to her husband story is told of a captain of a ship who looked into the dark one night and saw a faint light in the distance immediately told a single man send a message altered your course 10 degrees south promptly a return message was received alter your course 10 degrees north the captain was angered and he commanded and and his command had been ignored and so he sent a second message alter your course 10 degrees south I am the captain soon another message was received alter your course 10 degrees north I'm a seaman third class immediately the captain sent a third message knowing the fear that it would invoke alter your course 10 degrees south I'm a battleship then the reply came alter your course 10 degrees north I'm a lighthouse I believe this book is a lighthouse amen this is God's work and if we do not alter our course to line with God's Word we're headed for destruction if we don't align our self with God's Word we're headed for destruction if you're here today and you don't know Jesus Christ he's what you need he can bring a new presence and a new power and a new peace and a new purpose in your heart and your home and in your marriage Jesus Christ transforms lives and the sea transforms marriages but it all starts with seeing your need for Jesus and trusting him as your Savior and if you haven't done that you need to do that you need to say Lord I I ask you to please forgive my sins and come into my heart and I surrender my life to you as Lord and Savior I want you to make me your child when you take up this book it's a lamp to our feet and a light to our path and you begin to read God's Word and obey God's Word and God's Spirit work through God's Word to change your life change your marriage now we only read one verse on the life but next went next Sunday one verse for the husband but God wants to heal your heart he wants to heal your home he wants to heal your marriage we must align our course we must change our course to line with God's Word amen

Channel: Revival Christian Fellowship

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Length: 34min 40sec (2080 seconds)

Published: Sun Aug 13 2017