- What's going on? I'm Kevin Hart and right now you're watching
season three of "Cold As Balls". Oh my God, my God. - What's happening? - CP, woo. He ain't six feet. F*ckin' liar. - 6'1". - Liar! - 6'1". - Put your robe on the hook. - [Chris] All right, all right, coach. - How you doing? - I'm good, you sure you all right with this? - Brother-- - This what athletes do. - What, what? - Athletes. - Say that word again. - Athletes. - Ain't what you said the first time, you
said ath-a-letes. - I ain't say that. - You said this is what ath-a-letes, ath-a-letes
do. Get in the tub, oh yeah! There we go, huh. Welcome everybody, to a all new episode "Cold
As Balls", I of course am your host. I am the Kevin Hart, and today I am very lucky
to have Mr. Chris Paul, how you doing brother? - Man, I can't complain, yourself? - I'm good, I can't complain either. Hey I'm not giving you all extra package am
I? I went a little higher with these trunks today. So let me know if we got to blur something
out. We had that incident one time. - Man, shut up. - What, no, one time I went too, I went too
Euro with the trunk. I go to get in the tub, bloop. We blurred it out though, we fixed it in post. I got no problem with that. You act like you the tallest person in the
world. - I'm not I, you know what? I'm usually the shortest person in most rooms
that I go into. - Are these rooms full of giants? Huh? White hand, weren't we in a place one time
and somebody was smaller than me? Huh? White hand? Okay, well, thank you, that's all I'm asking,
Jesus Christ. And who's this mixed hand back here? Who's this bi-racial hand? Where's white hand? - What's wrong with you man? Come on man, we got to go, we got to go. - You are the definition of family guy. I've been to your house. - Hmm. - When you out here in California, I mean,
you had everybody from Charlotte out there. Is it expensive? - It is, but it's a gift to yourself. The people that I have probably the closest
relationships with, you, Bron, a different guy, is guys that are about their family. - Mm-hmm. - That's what we talk about probably more
than anything. We gotta keep it moving. - Yeah. - I gotta get rolling. - You right, next step. - I'ma go ahead. - Next step. - Yup. - Okay. - CP, you have-- - Man, get in! - Brother, you don't rush me. I run this! Let's talk about your start in the NBA. You're coming out of Georgia Tech, you end
up in New Orleans. - You're damn wrong. - Where'd you go? Wake Forest. - Wake Forest. - Wake Forest, you don't have to say damn
wrong. It's the same colors. - Not really, but okay. - They both black and yellow. - That was J. Jack, Jarrett Jack went to Georgia
Tech. - Okay, two scoop ball head-- Friends of mine,
okay? - You know what's, people always say that
too. One is blue and gold, one is black and gold. - Oh come on, man. - [Chris] Color blind. - Now everybody a color surgeon. Mixed hand! All right, this episode of "Cold As Balls"
has been brought to you by Old Spice. Sweat defense anti-antiperspirant, which lasts
for 48 hours. Getcha some! All right, why is it always such a crazy time
when it comes to these trades, and the way that they're happening? You've been a part of some of the biggest
conversations. Is there a point where it's just business? Or is it becoming personal? - Every situation is different, but the team's
gonna do whatever they want to do. They'll tell you one thing, and do a smooth
'nother thing. - That's the business side of it? - Exactly. - Have you felt like there's been times where,
damn, that's a little eye opener? - Absolutely. - Got stabbed in the back. - This last situation was one of them. You know, the GM there in Houston, he don't
owe me nothing. You know what I mean? He may tell me one thing, but do another thing,
but you just understand that that's what it is. - You've been a part of some of the craziest
shit that has happened in the NBA, the Donald Sterling shit. - That was real crazy, but that, that was
tough, but we got through it 'cause we did it as a team. We talked a lot as a team, and we just tried
never to become the story. - Y'all tried to be bigger than the stuff
that was going on. - Exactly. - And move beyond it. - Yeah. - Let's talk Lob City. Let's talk about that god damn, that era. - I was throwing lobs from half court. - Stupid. - Like, on the regular. - It was stupid. - Even just coming off a screen, I came off
one screen against New Orleans-- - What are you doing right now? - I'm dribbling a basketball. - Just wanted to know what that was. - This is what athletes do. So I was dribbling off a screen and I just
threw it and Blake went and got it. Like, Blake was a freak. - What do you think the word is on Chris Paul
in the NBA? - That's a good question, I don't know. - Well that's why I fuckin' asked it. - Some guys probably think its hard to play
with me. I try to compete at a high level, always be
a good teammate. If you can handle that, cool, if not than
I do what I can. - Is there anything that you would tell young
Chris Paul, that's playing in the NBA to do different if you could? - Yes. When I got to LA it was life-changing, 'cause
I learned about diet, I learned about eating. I got a chance to play with Grant Hill, who
taught me about the things that I'm putting into my body so-- - I thought you was gonna say big ears. - Who? - When you said Grant Hill told you, I thought
you was gonna say about how to deal with life with big ears, 'cause you guys both have. - Everything good with you? - No I was gonna, your ears-- - Is everything good with you? - Yes, I'm telling you what-- - Okay, when you talk to me right now, I can't
see your ears. - What does that, I'm not-- - I thought you didn't have ears. - We don't have to do this. We're having a great conversation. Darrell, are we not having a great conversation? Where the f*ck are your glasses? Can you see? Did you leave your glasses again? God damn it, Bam? Where's his glasses? Bam! He probably don't even know who the f*ck is
in the tub. God damn it! - You're the first elf I ever seen with no
ears. - Oh, that's just great. - I can't see 'em. - All right, all right, I get it. - It's time to fully get in here. - White hand, where you at? - Let's do it. Well, it's mixed hand today. - Mixed hand? - And whoever made that decision is f*cking
fired! - Mixed hand is diversity. - No. - It's a combination. - No, no, I need two whites. Bam-Bam and white hand. Okay, that puts me in a different ratio. Then I got Darrell, me, and you. I got three black people today, this is not
good. When we get a chance, I need a white guy to
run by in the back just so they know. - Stop all the talking. - All right come on, let's go. There you go brother, give 'em the thing. All right, all right. - Oh, dip. - I got a good one for you right now, a good
question. - Shut up, shut up, hold up. - So-- - Hold up, just stop talking for a second. - Brother! Oh, so you just want dead time, huh? He don't know how TV work. Ma, ma, me, CP don't know how TV work. All right are you okay now? Let me go ahead in. - If I'm right here, then you are in danger
of drowning. - That's why I never sit all the way down. - You are in danger of drowning. - It gets close to my neck. - You are definitely in danger of drowning. - I don't feel safe sometimes. Here's my other question, you got you, Bron,
and you got DWade, you got Melo, you got Russell, you got KD. You guys all have a f*cking bond. - Yup. - Right? What I want you to tell people is simply how
that bond has never been compromised, regardless of the movement that's taking place in the
NBA. - You know, winnings and losses they happen,
but if you don't got no real friends, it's lonely out there. - That's right. - You can have all the money, you can have
all the championships you want, but if you ain't got real people around you at the end
of the day, you empty. - Well, that's why I want to say you're welcome. 'Cause I know that's your way of saying thank
you, Kev, for being one of my real friends, and you're welcome. - Kev-- - You don't have to get emotional-- - That wasn't about you. - Oh, let me finish. You don't have to get emotional and bring
this thing down to a place where you end up crying in the tub. - No. - So you're welcome. - No. - Let me tell you a funny story. Darrell, you know my son. My son, Hendrix, for a brief moment displayed
an interest-- For the game of basketball, so you know what I did? I called CP. CP, dude want to play ball. You listening to me, Darrell? Can you see where I'm at? You f*cking better be listening. 'Cause I'ma quiz you on this story later. So I say, "CP, my son want to play". He takes my son to go play basketball. I'm expecting my son to come back on cloud
nine. "How was it son?" My son looks me in the eye, and goes, "He
can't play". "I just want to learn from Mr. Radoff, my
gym teacher." Mr. Radoff, who the f*ck is that, son? - Man, we had a good time, but he didn't want
to come back. He was so tired when we left too, he was knocked
out. - He hasn't touched a basketball since. - He was knocked out. - He was on fast break and he just stopped
running and started counting the lights, that's when I gave up. I was like, all right, this it. What was this Banana Boat shit? What's the Banana Boat thing with all the
guys, that was out there for a minute? What is that? - Man, you been on vacation before right? - Yes. - You go on vacation, you just wanna have
a good time. You ain't worried about everybody. - Oh, y'all got caught. - You just. - Oh, you got on a Banana Boat with the fellas? - We thought we was having a good time. - One picture will ruin you. - Yeah. - OKC, next chapter. - Yes. - What do you want from this chapter right
now? - I'm excited, and I'm not, old by no means,
you are. - Well. - You are. But I'm not old by no means. - In basketball years. - But it's crazy when you're on a team and
guys like, "Man, I remember when I was in elementary school "and I used to watch you". - Yeah. That means you're old. - I'm not. - Listen, you just don't want to get to that
point where you start walking with your ass on your back. You ever see Charles Barkley walk, right? Charles Barkley's a** is right behind his
head. It wasn't always there, but it's something
that happens because when basketball players get older, they start to lean forward. You haven't gotten there yet, you're still
in a good place. So this is a good time for you, man. The one thing that I gotta talk about. Houston Golden State. Damn. You get hurt in game six. It was your hamstring, right? - It was my hamstring. - Yeah. You're sitting on the sideline. What did that do to you, mentally? - Game six was at Golden State and the feeling
that I had on the court, I never had that feeling. Right before jump-off, trying to find me a
bathroom 'cause I got nauseous, I was about to throw up. - Mm-hmm. - And it was because I knew that I couldn't
do anything to affect the game, was definitely one of the hardest things I ever went through. - Jeez, it reminds me of when I played, Bam-Bam,
you remember, I tell you all the time, about me in the church league. We made it to the finals against Christian
Bell. And I'll never forget it, Pastor Jenkins,
Pastor Jenkins gave a 47. We didn't know Pastor Jenkins could hoop. He's not a preacher no more, he's in a jail. Found out he was moving weight in the church. You now in Houston, tensions flare, tensions
are f*ckin' high man. There's a rumor of f*ckin' CP going through
a underground tunnel. - Right. - Like Harriet Tubman to go f*cking fight. They called you the Harriet Tubman of today. - Oh, that was funny too. So it was said that me and James got in a
fight in the back. I think the toughest part behind that was
that the game happened or whatever, it was all the issues or whatever, and tempers flared
in the back. Once again, the media, and it was a good story. It was a good story, people saying this, saying
that. - More media embellishment, you gotta love
it. - You been asking me all the damn questions. Let me ask you a few questions. See if you know. - Oh brother, I know you like the back of
my hand. - Well, I mean, I should ask you, start off,
and ask you what college I went to. You would've got that one wrong. - I would have said what colors? - So listen, what pick of the draft was I? - Come on now, you gonna ask me that? - I'ma ask you that. - You went in the first round. - You know how many rounds it is, right? - Three. - Three rounds. - Yes, you went in the first round - That show how dumb you are, it's two rounds
in the NBA draft. What pick was I? - You were number four. - Mm. - You were number four. - That's a good eye right there. That was real nice, whoever was back there
throwing up them four fingers. - Number four, get it in there. Yeah. - Hey Bam, you ain't did nothing else he told
you to do all day, and you gonna do that? How many gold medals do I have? - How many gold medals do you have? - How many? - You. - Me. - Are we talking about bought or you talking
about the ones from competing? 'Cause you bought some gold. - Huh? - I know that - Did I. - You definitely bought some gold. - Did I? How many? - Three. - Yup, yup, you're exactly wrong. Let him get some ice. So he tell you what to do? - Where am I ranked on the all-time assist
leader board? - Ooh, I can, all right, well let's say who
you not above, okay? - Tell me who I'm not above. - Let's start there. Avery Johnson, he definitely kicking your
a**. - Yup. - Earl Boykins, I know you're not above him. - Man, you got that right - He definitely kicking your a**. - So what is it, what number? - No, you're number two, you're number two. - Number two? - Number two. - On the all-time? - Number one, come on, man, you don't think
I know? - Number seven. - Yes. - Number seven. - You don't think I f*ckin' know? - How many assists you think I done had in
my career so far? - In your career, you're over 15,000. - Please. - Come on, man! - 15,000. - Ah, no, stop, I mixed 'em up. Pastor Jenkins had 15,000 assists. So last thing I got to ask you, man. Your facial expressions have become legendary. You laughing at Steve Kerr and then stop laughing. The meme that has taken social media by storm. It was ha ha, and then you. It's like what I do to you, Darrell, when
you tell me shit you think it's so good. You like, remember that time? And I'm like, yeah, no, go f*ck yourself. Right? - Man. - You know what I'm talking about? - I don't really remember. He might have said something like, no, that
was a travel, or something like that, you know what I mean? - Do you remember how you did it? - Do I remember how I did it? - I'ma tell you something funny and then let's
see if you can do it. Are you ready? Here it come. - I guess - All right, how do you make a napkin dance? Put a little boogie in it. I thought you was laughing for real. I thought I really got him. Ladies and gentlemen, this has been cold as
Paul. I, of course, am your host, Kevin Hart and
this is Cliff Paul. - Who, this is who? - Good show, Cliff. Good show, buddy. Bam-Bam, take the nuggets out of Darrell's
dressing room, he's not eating today. This is the second day that you're not gonna
eat. So, how often do y'all take these Banana Boat
trips? Is it a thing, I'll go, I'll roll with y'all. We just got to say no pictures. You know, at the end of the day, you don't
want that to be seen. Why would all you all go back to back? Whatever, we can talk about that later.
