Changes in Personality and Behavior of A Dementia Patient

I'm Al Gordon I live here with my wife I think that the roughest part of this whole thing is watching your wife deteriorate as you live with her my wife was a teacher for thirty years she was a president of the New York State Teachers Association she was a president of Hadassah she used to paint and you look at her now and it's very easy for somebody to say don't put too much into it don't kill yourself you can't the wood we're in an awkward spot because she's past the initial stage of Alzheimer's but she's nowhere near the other end of it so that half of the time have you talked you would never know she's even sick but her memory is shot she hasn't and she's she it's very difficult apart I mean what else I tell you well I find it very difficult now because she's finally fully aware that she's sick and and the one thing she's on it don't leave me alone don't know my dad even take me away you know she and the fever and then yesterday she works up I mean she says can't you help me this variable you can do well I changed my kid is James bitter I'm now sending you five days a week to my second home it has I think her attendance there has had a great beneficial effect 204 huh we're experimenting with the five days we don't know it might be too much for her not sure and I went we went to the neurologist on Tuesday no Thursday and you know I don't know I sometimes sit in question why do we go to these meetings because there's nothing they can do he looks at you yes you have five questions which we know she's not going to be able to answer and and he says I'll see you in nine months well what he told me this time was that I better start looking into nursing homes so that's not a positive position that's that's different so we've got to step up on that she is able to do quite a few things which I consider myself lucky because for she plays the piano and people say she plays the beer I said yeah it's the same music over and over again I played a pianist you can read the paper she can actually carry on a conversation and she's if you didn't know that she had Alzheimer's you would just think that you know she's normal but or maybe she's just forgetting things but the thing about Alzheimer's is that I never knew she had it as probably you people have found out that it it is it was told to me by my friends which was you know false keeps repeating things or forgetting things and I said oh so I thought I'd you know keep an eye on that and then I took it to the doc and they said yeah she has signs of Alzheimer's so that was a shock to me because that's the last thing I thought that would happen to her she was we go to dances we like today I'm taking her to the nutrition center now in Peekskill so she could see her friends again and she's pretty normal and I used the word pretty loosely because she can do everything she was to get upset ah my son just uh he came up from Atlanta to see me for a week and he put in a bolt on top of the door I was talking about getting a deadbolt so that I can lock it from the inside with a key and then they said you can't do that against the law so we have this bolt that all I can do is I'll move it over when she tries to get out because I don't know why but she thinks she lives across the street and she keeps telling me she's gonna go home put your harp on and the first time it happened she got out and went across the street and ride the Bell and then she came back in to me and she says there's somebody home I says where'd you go I says I went alone I said but this is your home now I went across the street so I told us sit down and I said let me see your shoes and her shoes were wet I said jeez you know if she did go across the street so then I start being a little more aware of what she was doing and she'll come into the den a TV and she says I gotta go over there I said you don't I says that's pop South no I live there no no you don't live there so I found not to argue with her I change the subject and it's great because now she's on another thought and that thing about the house is gone so she'll come in I got nothing to do and that's the biggest problem you know that there's no other ladies around so that's why the the nutrition center is important for her core she meets a lot of people there and our visiting other places is limited so we also go up to Grandma the mother Lorena house which is a very nice home there that's run by the nuns and they're a support group for a lot of adults that have problems and they do singing and we go to hospitals and nursing homes and sing for people and she likes that and she likes the people but she always wonders what am i doing I don't know anybody here but then after she goes in I can't get away from people she's talking to them she's friendly and everything and then when we leave little nuns are giving her a rose and we did take a home and she's quite happy but uh so I I have to try to keep her occupied the afternoons would go for a walk down on a track I'm lucky I think that she's cooperative with me and the things that we do that is there's no indication that she has a disease except when you talk to her and she doesn't know who you are or we'll be sitting there eating and she'll talk about something and then two minutes later should be talking about it again and I'll say fellas fellas we just talked about that okay so that's it you know always a terrible disease and the fact that we have a place like this but I think if you have a partner you have to do a lot of things you can also get worn out and I try to keep a happy attitude and the walks we take is good because we meet other people the nutrition we meet people and we go to the firehouse whenever they have affairs so you really have to put her in circulation cause when she's home by herself I think it's the worst thing because most of the time when she got not to do she's sleeping you know two things she loves to do eating sleep I mean eat I can I make supper every night I put in front of her at the table while watching television and she says boy she says you made that I said nothing I don't tell her that it's some of the stuff that we get from the nutrition center some of the stuff I went to the supermarket so I'll put some pickles and potato salad and stuff and make a half a sandwich and she thinks it's great you know and then I give a coffee and then I give her a piece of cake you know and she's happy yeah but she never says I'm not hungry No I think I place exactly when I think I'm lucky at this point what's going to be down the road I don't know

Channel: CaregiverInsights

Views: 285,072

Keywords: Alzheimer's, Dementia, Changes, in, Personality, and, Behavior;, Caregiver, Insights, Foundation;, cif;, caregivers, personal, reflection;, disease;

Id: m18shMbpsQQ

Length: 10min 12sec (612 seconds)

Published: Thu Apr 28 2011