Bully Boss? Six Steps to "Beat the Beast"

[Music] hi I'm Alan's clover this is clover working wisdom the blog site that's dedicated to your success in negotiating and navigating for yourself at work this is our video number 20 in our video series that's intended to give you information insight and inspiration to stand up for yourself at work this video is one of our most important videos because it deals with an increasingly common and perplexing problem what we call the bully boss the title of this video is bully boss the six steps to beat the Beast now this problem is so common and so important that 17 states here in the US are now considering legislation to make bully bosses pay as a violation of law now there have been no state yet who have passed those laws so at this time the law itself is not very protective of employees that's okay you can help yourself nonetheless with what we call self help and that's truly the purpose of this blog site I will present to you right now six steps that you can take to beat the beast so to speak of a bully boss first acknowledge that you have a problem at work it is a problem and it is only a problem it is something that you can overcome though a bully boss often makes his or her employees feel helpless intimidated humiliated sometimes infuriated you can counter the actus in my thirty years as an employment attorney helping individuals we have been successful successful many times in using these six steps to beat a bully boss so acknowledge you of a problem but acknowledge to yourself that it is only a problem and it is a problem that can be overcome the second step is the following do not engage in the bully boss's antics do not get involved in screaming matches arguments discussions that you know and the bully boss knows is only a trap for you many many bully bosses male and female do bully bossing as almost a taunt they do it because they want you to get involved in a game that only they can win so step number two is do not engage in a battle with the bully boss farmers have a saying you don't wrestle with a pig because the pig loves to get muddy you don't argue with a bully boss over his or her bully bossing step 3 gather a record now what do I mean by a record gather when you're home with a piece of paper and a pen not at the office but couldn't make a list of facts events witnesses documents that can very graphically illustrate the bullying that you are experiencing all of the things people perhaps who have left customers who have left employees who have left all sorts of incidents with specifics that will illustrate the bullying most importantly if the bully boss him or herself is engaging in any kind of impropriety make a note of that cheating on times sheets perhaps petty cash expenses perhaps giving people performance improvement plans which are really not honest make a list of those also that's what we call gathering the record step number four review your employee handbook at work and your corporate policies look for statements that are protective with regard through prohibiting harassment of people that make it a violation of company policies to engage in hostility dishonesty fraudulent practices discrimination any kind of retaliation because those are most of the things that bully boss is engaging on a regular basis so review your employee handbook review your employee conduct manual or policy manual and look for things that the bully boss has violated step number five make a list of what you consider to be the damages to the company that have been caused by the bully boss due to his or her bullying it might be good employees who have left and discussed it might be lost opportunities with customers who just couldn't deal with the bully boss it might be vendors who have chosen not to work with the company because of the antics and the attitude of the bully boss make a list of those damages step number six is the big step it is to make a written complaint or a record of the bully boss's activities the wrongful activities it is something that you should write up with specificity something that you should consider less an accusation and more a report of an improper conduct it is something that you must be scrupulously honest about if you're not certain of something say that I believe but I am NOT certain that something took place if you believe that documents may exist to prove this matter say I believe documents do be as honest and as scrupulously specific as you possibly can in writing up this written complaint now I know many of you are going to instantly say I cannot do that because I will be retaliated against sooner or later in one form or another it's for this reason that we usually suggest that your first complaint be anonymous that it not include your name or anything in the complaint that would identify you include details as I said before of incidents and witnesses and maybe even lists yourself as one of the witnesses involved in one of the incidents but do your best not to identify yourself it should be in writing it should be typewritten or word-processed it should be delivered to by first class mail from a mailbox near your workplace not near your home deliver to the CEO the board of directors or and even and I usually suggest this the local district attorney because some of the things that your bully boss may do may in fact rise to the level of being a crime now I often suggest that people have another person who is very close to them not a colleague at work but a family member perhaps do the word processing so if human resources asked you did you write this you can honestly say no likewise if that very trusted friend or family member mails it for you if you're asked by human resources did you send this you can honestly say no that may seem deceptive but it is an honest answer to an imprecise question that can help you in your letter in your complaint which should be again very specific and totally honest cite harassment but be specific what kind of harassment against who and when site incidents of hostility especially if there's any dishonesty or fraud if most importantly if anyone has ever been touched or by this person in an unfriendly way or an unwelcome way or if any of this if the bully boss has ever thrown or threatened an employee put it down there that itself may be a crime perhaps most importantly also put in if this person has engaged in retaliation and mentioned that the reason I'm sending this letter is because I fear retaliation ask for an investigation of this and ask that if he or she the bully boss has been found to do something wrong that they be appropriately disciplined warned and if necessary even terminated bully boss is an increasingly common problem and increasingly perplexing problem and more and more people and even legislators are recognizing it for how corrosive it is don't fall prey to it it can be overcome with these six steps again I'm Alan's clover this is clover working wisdom the blog site on our blog site you will find questions and answers I've answered for people who have written in and you can do that too at no charge I have articles you can read we have videos all on opportunities and problems at work to help you again with information with insight and with inspiration to stand up for yourself at work and to be treated the way you should be for 30 years now I've been helping my clients worldwide with their own opportunities and problems at work I've helped them navigate and negotiate successfully it with just problems and opportunities just like this now for the rest of my professional life that's what I want to do for you so please come and visit our blog sites go over working wisdom calm once again I'm Alice clover and I thank you for watching our video today [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] you [Music]

Channel: Sklover Working Wisdom

Views: 246,770

Rating: 4.8752737 out of 5

Keywords: bully boss, bully supervisor, politics, office politics, bully at work, counteract your bully, work bully, work bullying, job bully, job bullying, Al Sklover, Sklover, Alan Sklover, Sklover Working Wisdom

Id: w2HkHxVUyRM

Length: 12min 5sec (725 seconds)

Published: Tue Sep 20 2011