(upbeat music) (gentle upbeat music) - Hi everyone and welcome back. My name is Dr. Nicole Assisi
and I am joined as always by my awesome colleague, Shelli Kurth. And together, as you know,
we've got a few years under our belt as educators and parents who are joining you today to provide you just some tips and tools
to help you stay sane in these times of unprecedented parenting and also to help your child thrive. So to kick us off today, Shelli tell us what we're talking about today. - Well, first of all, for more about today and the resources we'll talk about today as well as the other
resources that can help you with distance learning, you
can go to our family playbook. It's completely free, and it's found at wwwthriveps.org, and you'll find a lot of tips and tricks to help you get through and stay sane during these weird times. You know, most of us,
we're all in the middle of a new school year and
homeschooling or distance learning or trying to balance work
life and school life. And I had a few families
call really panicked because they're recognizing
that getting their kids back into a school schedule has
been particularly difficult. It was a weird spring and then
maybe even a weirder summer with not the same things
that we do all the time. And now we're back at school and supposed to be having
a rhythm and a routine. And it's feeling harder. One of the big problems
is sleep and exercise and then figuring out how to navigate the new communication style
that is distance learning. How are we getting to know our teachers? How are we getting the best for our kiddos in this new world? So today we're gonna be talking
about those three things. How to develop that
new routine and rhythm, getting your kid to sleep and exercise, and then how do you develop a
relationship that's positive and assumes the best of
intentions and graceful but also getting what you need and your kiddo needs out of school. Nicole, why don't you start us off today. - With my favorite topic, sleep. Now, my enthusiasm comes from
not getting enough these days. You know, I have a toddler at home, but sleep is super important
and hard to get into a rhythm of especially when school
looks so different. You know, usually you have
to get up in the morning to shower and get dressed. And if your kids, any thing like mine he usually zooms in his PJ's. So creating a schedule can be hard, which means that creating a
sleep routine can be hard. It also could be even harder to get into the sleeping rhythm now because we're spending more time indoors which means less time
outside getting vitamin D, less time exercising, burning off energy and more time online which actually makes it harder for, as we mentioned in other episodes for the brain to come to rest and to get into our sleeping rhythm. So all of those things are
probably making it hard for your kiddo, whether they are seven or whether your children are 17 it's getting harder to find a rhythm. Now, I say the word rhythm a lot because one of the most critical things is to really create some consistency. So sleep is really important
and occurs in patterns. Children, as we mentioned before need at least somewhere around 10 hours. Again, in previous episodes,
we discussed exactly how many hours and tips
for each age range, but remembering that your
kid needs enough sleep most sleep should be
occurring before midnight. Again, experts actually
say before nine o'clock, getting to sleep is really important. But independent of when you go to sleep, make sure you're getting
enough hours of sleep so that your body can
get into that rhythm. And make sure that you're consistent so that there's not a huge difference between weekdays and weekends. Your body really needs to get used to it and it cannot get used to
and fall in its rhythms, if you know, on some on weekdays you're going to sleep at seven and then on weekends you're
going to sleep at 10. Makes it really hard for your body. The other thing that's really important is eating and drinking well. Now, everybody knows that
coffee before bed is not good. We also know that sugar
before bed is not good but most of us often
forget that carbohydrates. So bread, pasta, all of
those things turn into sugar. And if your kiddo is having
a hard time falling asleep and you feel like they're kind of amped up as if they've had too much sugar think about the carbs that
they're putting into their body and look at your diet in that way. And last but not least having
a comfy, quiet, and dark space is also super important. Now, when everybody's working from home and in the home, it
might be time to invest in a white noise machine, or maybe even getting
some blackout curtains to keep it dark. So even though we're heading into the winter months right now those are always a good idea. My son even though he's seven, still has a white noise machine and some darker shades just to
make it a little bit easier. Hey, I'll take all the help I can get when it comes to sleep. Now, if you have an older kid having sleep conversations
can sometimes be really hard. You know that for a while, we had a teenager living with us and my rule of thumb is
always clear communication is half the battle. We actually looked at some research because he was trying to convince me that he did not need enough sleep or did not need more sleep. So we read some research articles, looked at what experts recommended. And then I just asked him
to create his schedule based on that expert research. So you don't always
have to be the bad guy. You can blame it on the scientist, blame it on the researchers. But again, create that consistent schedule with a good diet and a comfy,
cozy, dark, quiet space to get you started. Half the battle is just
getting enough sleep. - Well, you said you had
a teenager living with you for a while. I get a teenager all the time. And one of the things that
I am noticing is naps. They love to take naps and you
know that's one of the things that can affect the sleep. If you take a big long nap
in the middle of the day and you know, they're at home and that's what they're
doing in between classes. Sometimes now that classes are online and there's not a lot of other
things happening for them. So trying to encourage your older kids if they're older than five, not to take a nap and try to
get them to do other things that can really help you
when it comes to bedtime and getting more sleep at night and going to bed at an earlier
time instead of a later time. And that is hard with teenagers. And I know we have to pick our battles and there's a natural consequence I suppose to staying up late. But when they're trying
to nap on my couch, I'm making a little extra
noise, trying to get them up. Exercise, you know our
kids aren't expending as much energy as they used to. Sports programs are often not happening. They're not running around at
recesses like they used to be. Things are just a different. And so trying to get some of
that energy out is important. Walking around the block,
encouraging riding a bike, anything you can do to
get some of that exercise that energy out through exercise will actually help them
sleep better at night. You might notice that for you too. That if you're off your exercise routine you sleep a little worse,
same thing with our kids. We need to burn some of that energy out. Get outside. If you can do the exercise
outside there you go, right? You've got two great things happening. The environment gives us hints to our body about when to be awake
and when to go to sleep. So if you're outside getting some light that's giving your body a
hint and then the dark comes and it gives your body another hint. So getting a little
vitamin D, getting outside that's promoting sleep and
promoting good sleep routine. And the hardest one is
to limit screen time. Really hard with my
teenager and super hard when so much of our day is on screens now. But if you can limit right before bedtime that we know the science shows that the more screen time
you have right before bed the worst you sleep. So trying really hard
to change that habit. And I know for a lot of us adults that's a habit we should change too. But getting those building good habits and trying to get them in
your kids now might be easier than waiting until they're old or older. Nicole, do you have anything to add? - Absolutely, and this
is really important. So we want you to lean in and listen. The single most important
thing that you can do is give yourself some grace. Everybody's doing the best that they can. There's a lot going on. Many of us are juggling work
and home and homeschooling and maybe you're even doing
your own master's program or graduate studies. You're trying to fit it
all in and it's hard. And sometimes it feels like
you're in it all alone. So remember to take a breath but also remember that when it comes to educating your child, you're
actually not in this alone. And there are some amazing
educators out there who you can lean on. So reach out to your child's teacher, before you do take a breath
they care about your kid. They're trying to do the best they can. This is just really darn
hard for them as well. So reach out to them and
ask if they have some tips. If there are some
moments that might not be as critical as others, if there are assignments
that they can skip or other assignments they might
have for you to supplement. They see children and
have for many, many years, and probably have some
really great useful tips that are specific in
particular to your child. So don't forget to reach out to them. Reach out with kindness
and grace and lean on them. There is so much happening right now that we can't isolate ourselves. We have to stick together. We have to work through this
to the best that we can. And your child's teacher is in this work because they care about education and wanna do the best that they can. So work with them,
together you have got this. We will make it through this. Check out the website for more tips and tools, thrive.ps.org. See you soon. Bye now. ( gentle upbeat music)
